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enigma-im · 4 years

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Like a Virgin

Rating: Mature Relationship: Incubus x Female!human Warning: betraying of trust, broken friendship, incubus are cum brains, comfort, fluff, no sex

Word Count: 7797

Can an Incubus and a virgin be friends?

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"Tatiana, or Tina. I know it starts with a T. Either way she was crazy, even for my standards! I couldn’t bring myself to say no to her though, her energy was intoxicating," Silas rants. I pay attention for the most part but he caught me in the middle of something. He just kind of started talking. Honestly, I don’t mind his stories, they are funny or interesting most of the time. I secretly think I'm the only one he talks to about this cause I'm the only one who listens. Add comments here and there. Everyone else is too busy trying to get his attention just to get an excuse to look at him.

"Your appetite is going to get you into trouble if you find yourself struggling to say no," I pass him a sly grin. Out the corner of my eye, I see him rest his crossed arms on the table. I feel him staring at me, probably thinking of some stupid joke. I fiddle with my tablet as I finish my document.

"What about you, I can't be the only one having weird sexual adventures. Even someone as quiet as you must have some really kinky shit to tell," Silas rest his head against the table. Just in the corner of my vision. I ignore him for a second as I write my last sentence.

I look over at him," what's that?"

"What's the weirdest sexual encounter you have had," he repeats. I cock an eyebrow, eyeing him for a second.

I turn back to my tablet," I've never had sex." I don’t notice him recoil from me. I open up my email and send over the file to another coworker. Once I finish I turn off my tablet and give Silas my full attention. He looks shocked. His mouth is slightly open and his eyes wide.

"what," I ask.

"You never had sex," he tilts his head. His eyebrows furrowing in concern.

"Nope, never have," I shrug. It's not a big deal, I know if I really wanted to then I can find some stranger. Still, that has never been alluring. I would rather be in a committed relationship before I do anything like that.

"How old are you, aren't you like 24? How can anyone live that long and not at some point had sex," he asks.

"I just haven't, it isn't a big deal," I begin to get embarrassed. When I was a teenager I thought about sex often. As I got older it has lost its appeal. I never dated in college because I was busy with work or school. Then finding a job I didn’t really bother with dating. After 21 I just didn’t care anymore.

Silas doesn’t share my sentiment.

"Is it a religious thing? Are you waiting till marriage or..," he sits down next to me," like you are pretty, I can't imagine you haven't had offers. Then its got to be a personal choice. So spill it, what's up." I begin to fold into myself, his questions making me nervous.

"I just haven't. there haven’t been any situations where I've had the choice. Not that I've put myself into those situations either way. So let's just drop it," I cross my arms and turn away from him. He grabs my chair and turns me back to face him. His face is serious, I've never seen him serious before.

"Are you interested in it? Are you asexual," he keeps questioning. Wanting to get away from his scrutiny I get up, knocking his arm from the chair. I walk around the seat, keeping it between us. "its ok if you are, I'm just trying to wrap my head around this," he tries to clarify.

"I rather not talk about this, if you don’t mind. My break is over so I'm going to go back to my office now," I try to be calm. I'm not going to hold this against him. He is an incubus, so I understand his interest in the topic. It doesn’t mean I have to answer him.

He drops it," alright, sorry. Didn’t mean to pry. Have a nice day, Chloe." with that we part ways.

I don’t see him again till the next day. What a weird day that was too.

"Hey, Chloe," someone stops me in the hall.

"Hey," I look the man over. He is a tall lanky fellow, short black hair and glasses. I remember seeing him around but his name evades me. I think it starts with an R.

"So I heard you are into local bands. You mentioned visiting Ricardo's on Saturdays. I was thinking, my brother's band is playing this weekend and I was curious if you would like to come see him," he asks. The entire time he is talking I'm trying to think of his names. Robert, Richie, Rhett? It takes a second for me to realize he asked a question.

"Oh, this Saturday? I'm going to visit my mother, my cousins are coming in for the weekend so I wanted to stop by and say hi," I answer honestly. I'm curious about his brother's band though. It's nice of him to promote his sibling like this.

He drops his shoulders," right, maybe another weekend then?"

"Yea, just let me know when he plays again. I'll stop by and check him out," I smiled curtly," but I really got to go, see you around?"

"Yea, sure. Later, Chloe," he waves. He looks a little dejected but I can't find myself to care.

The day gets a little weirder when I'm visited by another coworker.

"Chloe, working hard as usual," I look over my desk to Derek. He is a short stout fellow with brown hair. Derek is a funny guy but I found his personality to be too overpowering.

"Of course, hard work promotes better values," I curtly smile. I believe that is the end of the conversation until he steps closer to my desk. He rests his elbows on it, leaning beside me.

"Working hard all the time, when do you ever take a break. Perhaps we can grab lunch later? Get out of the building. I know a nice little pizza joint down the way," he offers.

"No thanks, I'm lactose intolerant so pizza doesn’t agree with me. Also, pizza without cheese is an awful idea. I may not be able to eat it much anymore but I know cheese makes a pizza," I try to joke. I know Derek is being friendly like usual but I can't bring myself to tolerate him today.

"Then how about the Chinese place on by the bank, they ha-,"

"Derek, stop bothering Chloe and get your ass back here," someone calls from out the door. Derek jerks his head over, glaring at the woman down the hall.

He turns back to me with a grin," Guess I have to pester you for a date later, till next time." with that he gets up and leaves. I watch him go with a confused look.

"He was asking me out?"

The time till lunch is filled with men, and a few women, coming up to me. For the most part, I think they were all asking me out. Some stumbled over their words so I didn’t understand. The ones I do know for sure I politely decline. I don’t wanna date, especially not someone from work. Most of them take it nicely, a small few are rude. Like Jose.

"Why not," Jose glares," it will be fun."

"I'm just not in the market for a boyfriend right now," I try to inch around him so I can head to the cafeteria. He slams his palm into the wall beside me.

"Not in the market? Silas told me otherwise," he leans in with a smirk.

"Silas told you," I stare confused. Pushing myself into the wall to get away.

"Yea, he said you were interested. Mentioned you would be an easy thing too," he tries to lean in closer. I dart underneath his arm, not bothering with him anymore. "Hey, we aren't done," he calls down the hall. I stop and glare at him over my shoulder.

"You ever talk to me again, I'm calling HR," I sneer. He rolls his eyes but walks off.

That dick! Not Jose, but Silas. What he doing telling everyone I'm interested? Telling people I'm an easy lay or something.

I change my course from the lunchroom to Silas' office. I stomp up the step, clenching my tablet in a tight grip. I slam open the door and march inside. I find him sitting in his chair, bent over his desk writing. When the door bangs against the wall he looks up. He starts with a smile but drops it when he sees my glare.

I slam my hands on his desk," Don’t you ever butt in my love life again. If I find out you are telling people that I'm 'easy' again I will cut your damn balls off. Do you understand me?" he sits back in his chair a little worried. Perhaps a little scared. My words take a second to sink in for him. Once they do he sits up.

"I never told anyone you were 'easy'. I said you they should try asking you out. Who said you were easy," he furrows his brow.

I slam my hands on the desk again," You shouldn’t be telling anyone anything about my interest. I never asked for your help, I never wanted your help. I've been asked out all day and you know damn well I don’t want that kind of attention."

He stands," What do you mean you don’t want that attention? You need that kind of attention. It isn't healthy to sit alone all day every day in your apartment. I want you to be happy, and I think this will do that. Excuse me for trying to be a good friend." I glare up at him, he glares back.

"If this is your idea of being a good friend then I rather you weren't," I sneer.

"What are you saying," he crosses his arms.

"I don’t want to be your friend. Friends I want around are ones who respect my privacy, not someone who makes people treat me like a thanksgiving meal. If I don’t want a relationship that is my fucking choice, Silas. Don’t talk to me or talk to anyone else about me. We are done," I push away from his desk. Moving it a little in the process. Then before he can say a word I stomp out his office. Running the conversation through my head till I'm gritting my teeth.

Who does he think he is telling people to proposition me. Does everyone in the office know I'm a virgin now? Everyone is going to look at me like a challenge. See who can get into my pants first. Fucking pigs. Silas the piece of shit.

The entire day is ruined until I get home. I put on some PJs and watch my favorite show. I don’t need Silas, the asshole. If I wanted help I would have asked him.

The rest of the week I avoid Silas. Which is harder than I thought. He seems to be everywhere I go. I head to the copying room, he is in there. I walk down for lunch, he is there. I go to a coworkers desk and he is talking with them. I can't tell if he is doing it on purpose or it’s a coincidence. Hardly matters, ill just sit in my office like a hermit.

Friday, just before quitting time I get a visitor. There is a knock on my door. I look up and my polite smile drops.

I look back down at my work," get out."

"I was going to ask if you are done throwing your tantrum but I see you aren't," Silas says walking in the room. I try my hardest not to look up. If I have to act like a child for him to leave then I will. I hear a chair squeak against the tile floor. I accidentally glanced up at him. He is sitting with his arms folded over his broad chest. He is staring straight at me, waiting for me to answer. I won't.

"Come on, do you want me to apologize? I don’t know what I did wrong but ill say sorry anyway. I'll be the bigger person here, I'm sorry Chloe. Is that better," he asks. I barely notice my grip tightening on the pen till my paper rips. The pen digging too hard into the page.

"You honestly don’t know what you did wrong," I grit my teeth," you selfish dick head." I glare up at him. He doesn’t seem phased. Knowing him he probably never been in a fight with a woman. Use to them falling at his feet because of his sexual prowess. Ain't going to work here.

"I tried to do something nice for you and you ignore me like a child. So excuse me for being a little confused," he snaps.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? You have everyone in the office looking at me like I'm some kind of challenge. I get asked every day by people to go out with them to bars. Knowing they are only hoping to get in my pants. Trying to get me wasted enough to sleep with them so they can come here and brag they got me first. I never asked for your help. If I wanted to get laid I would have done it by now," I cross my arms. Glaring over at him, daring him to downplay my feelings on this.

"If you could have gotten laid then why haven't you done it. I've been trying to wrap my brain around this all week. You are an attractive young woman and you have never gone out to get someone. I know you are interested in it, you listen to my stories with such open wonder. I thought for the longest time you have, you hold your own in a conversation about it so well. Why are you a virgin," he asks. I don’t need to answer him. I don’t have to justify my choices. Yet, I feel like I do.

"Because I never found the one. I don’t trust anyone enough to not hurt me after. Most of the guys I might have had sex with I knew they would either leave before I woke the next day or brag about it to friends. I was always the pretty one, nothing more. Hell I know I got my job because I was attractive. I don’t want a one night stand or a simple night of pleasure. I want a relationship, I want to trust them not to leave me once they had their fill. I'm not just a body to be used, I'm a person," I finally answer. It's true, I haven't trusted anyone. Everyone makes sex into a simple thing. Just shared pleasure that doesn’t have to mean anything. But to me it does, I want the connection. To please someone while they want to please me.

He sits there for a second. Eyeing me as he thinks.

"What makes you think that those people aren't in it for a serious thing? Who has made you believe that people are just there to use you," he asks calmer.

"Because you talk about doing that every day," I scowl," answer me honestly. Have you ever stayed the night at one of your partner's home? Made them breakfast the next morning as thanks for the night before." he tries to glare at me but I know the truth. I may not trust people to fuck me but he doesn’t trust people to want him after. I've known Silas for almost a year and this is a fact I gathered early on. No one wants a relationship with an Incubus. They are known for being unfaithful so why risk it?

"No," he drops his head, " I'm sorry Chloe." this is more sincere. I wasn’t ready for that. I know our relationship isn't much. We are friends because of the circumstances. If we didn’t work together then we would have never even spoken to each other. I never expected him to actually apologize.

"thank you," I mumble. He lifts his head and looks at me through his lashes.

"Are we still friends," he asks. It comes out soft, to my surprise. I think about it. I don’t think I can trust him after this. The little faith I had in him was gone once he told everyone I needed to be fucked.

"No," I answer. I find I can't look him in the eye when I said it. I do notice his shoulders dropping.

Without another word he stands, nods, then leaves. After that, I don’t see him as much.

The weekend comes and goes. I get to see my cousins and forget about the situation for a while. The week goes smoothly. I don’t see Silas at all that week. Come to hear it, most people haven't seen him. He comes into work and doesn’t socialize like he used to. I want to feel responsible for that but I know it isn't me. We weren't that close. He is a social butterfly, talks to everyone. I was just the only one who didn’t actively flirt with him. I listened to what he had to say, I was polite.

After about two weeks I forget about him. I don’t worry about his whereabouts or comings and goings. Some coworkers still try to get me to date them but more are asking me about Silas. I don’t care.

Its Saturday and I'm sitting on my couch. I flip through Netflix for anything new to watch. Shoving handfuls of chips into my mouth. The oil getting on the remote as well as my pants.

There is a knock at the door. I jump at the harsh noise of a fist against wood. It echoes through my apartment. I stare at the entrance, waiting for the sound of footsteps down the brick stairs. Instead, I get another knock and a voice.

"Chloe, I need to talk to you," the voice is muffled. It’s a man for sure, but unless I get up and check I don’t know who it is. I place my bowl on the table then walk over to the door. Knowing the dangers of opening up to anyone I grab the bat near my fridge. I step over and peak through the eyehole. I see a fisheye view of Silas. His hair is sticking to his forehead and his clothes look wet.

"Chloe, please," he drops his head to the door. Part of me wants to open it just so he can trip forward. But another part wants him to leave now.

"Go away," I yell. Still looking through the hole I see his head pop up. He looks directly at the peephole now.

"Chloe, please. Just five minutes, that’s all I ask," he holds out his hands. I can see he is dripping wet.

"Why should I," I yell back.

"Because I want to apologize. I've had time to think and I really need to talk with you," he is practically begging. I have never heard him beg. Even in his stories, he is never the one to be a sub, to beg for anything. He is probably used to people throwing themselves at his feet just to get a taste of him.

I try to fight my goodwill. I shouldn’t let him in. but it's raining out and he is standing here soaking wet just to talk to me. Yet I don’t owe him anything, just let him get sick. Still, I'm curious.

With a sigh, I grabbed the doorknob. Pulling it open with a reluctant grimace. This better not be a mistake.

I look up at a soaked Silas. His white button-up is taunt to his torso. I can see his undershirt easily now. His black slacks are dripping over his shoes and onto the doormat. He looks tired. Black rings under his eyes along with his cheeks being hollow. He doesn’t look healthy.

"You look like shit," I deadpan. I didn’t want to be the first one to talk but I couldn’t resist the jab.

He chuckles," yea, I've noticed. Can I come in?" I look him over again. He isn't coming in here dripping all over the place.

"You are soaked, ill grab a towel," I turn and walk to the linen closet. I grab a towel and walk back over. I nearly trip when I see him taking off his shirt. Kicking his shoes off beside the mat. He balls up his shirt then reaches back and grabs the undershirt. I get to see his flat stomach, then his toned pecs. Silas isn't buff by any standards. He has definition but not great mass. He doesn’t have abs but his stomach is flat and toned. His chest is broad but it isn't strong. Only his arms hold any girth. His biceps and shoulders being the only things with muscle.

He looks up at me," Sorry. Thought it would be easier if I had less to dry." I come back to myself.

"It's alright, here," I walk over and hand him the towel. Not looking at him anymore. I turn away from him and go to my couch. Sitting on the farthest end. I watch as he dries himself before stepping in. he wraps the towel around his waist then removes his pants from underneath. I look away as he does.

"You can look, I'm not showing anything," he laughs. I still don’t look. It's hard to be mad at someone when they are half-naked in your living room. Cant give a proper glare if I'm blushing. He is the first man I've seen to this level of disrobe.

"What do you want," I decide to get to the point. I don’t want him here longer than he has to be. After a second of him not answering I look over at him. He is staring down at the ground, his hair blocking his eyes.

"I miss you," he starts. I look at him confused and skeptical. I don’t trust him. He looks over when I don’t answer, " I wanted to respect your choice of not wanting to see me but…" he sighs.

He takes a moment to collect himself," I've been a mess without you. I couldn’t understand why either. I know I liked talking with you but this feeling is a lot. I think about you constantly, I catch myself walking to your office often. It hasn’t been just my thoughts you are ruining too." he looks up at me, in the light, his face looks terrible. The low light makes his face look almost skeletal. I can see the shadow of his ribs under his pecs. Has he not been eating? Then it clicks, he hasn’t been feeding.

"What did you do," I find myself asking," are you feeding?"

He shakes his head," I haven't since we stopped talking. I can't bring myself to go out. For the first week, I was confused. I forced myself out the second week but I did something I haven't done ever. I said no to someone. I didn’t want to fuck them, the idea of it was sickening at the time. I had to ask my brother what was happening. Maybe I was sick and needed some help. My brother told me differently." I watch him, worried about him but not wanting to show it. I've known the guy for a year, we got a little close. The time I've known him I never heard him having this issue. He has never not fed. He is a man whore to the max! this is so out of character.

"What did he tell you," I ask. He opens his mouth to answer but shuts it. He tries again but nothing comes out. He drops his head to his shoulder, wincing. Running his fingers through his wet hair and adjusting his towel too much.

"Why is it so hard to tell you," he groans," I just want you to know that I'm honestly sorry about telling everyone. At the time I thought I was helping but it isn't till later that I realized you never wanted my help. Also that it isn't the help I wanted to give you. I want you to be happy, truly I do. In my dumb cum brain way of thinking I thought that my way of helping would be what makes you happy. I'm sorry. I still want to help but now it's more complicated. If not selfish now."

I sit up," what do you mean?" I'm worried. If his way of helping before was to make me a living target for people at work, I hate to see what it is now.

"I have to tell you something, and I need you to work with me on this. I don’t know if I can say it if I'm being honest," he runs his fingers through his hair again," you know I care about you. We have been friends for a while. I cherish our conversation, you were the only one who listened. Not even the sex stuff but everything. Like when I told you about my insecurities, I knew I could trust you with them. I know you are someone I can trust, and I want you to trust me." he walks over to the couch. Flopping on the other end. He leans over and looks me in the eyes. The action sends a tingle down my spine. His eyes are searching, I can feel him searching.

"What are you doing," I lean hard against the arm of the couch. He scoots a little closer. Still looking at me, in me. It feels invasive. After a second he smiles.

"You know one of my powers is emotions. On the account I feed off them it should seem self-explanatory. Either way, I can see a person's feelings. Strong ones radiate from someone like a beacon, do you know what I see when I look at you," he cocks a brow. I shake my head," I see loneliness. When we first met it was like being slapped. You were pouring with it. So I was drawn to you, wanting to fix that in some way. My intention was pure, I wanted to see you smile. Make your day less alone. When you stormed into my office I could feel the rage boiling off you. It was suffocating. But now, now I can see fear, worry, and affection. Fear for what I'm saying, worry for me, and affection for me. So, Chloe, I will tell you what I came here for." he scoots close enough for our legs to touch. He grabs my hands away from my chest, resting them in my lap. Then he just stares at me, a smile gracing his lips.

"What," I mumble, "What did you come to say?"

"That I'm in love with you," he finally answers. His words are like a jolt down my spine. It's of both joy and rage. I rip my hands from his hold. He frowns.

"Fuck you," I hop over the arm of the couch. Putting as much distance between us as I can. He watches me as I pace the room. He looks sad but I couldn’t give a damn at the moment.

"You don’t get to fucking say that," I snap at him," you don’t get to be an asshole then decide you did it out of affection. That isn't how this works, Silas." he jumps from the couch. Walking over to me but I hold my arm out to stop him.

"Please, Chloe," he tries to talk.

"No, don’t 'please Chloe' me. This isn't fair, this isn't ok! You don’t get to ruin my work-life then march in here two weeks later saying you love me. You lying piece of shit," I point at him. As he hears my last words he sneers. Grabbing my hand he pulls me close. I fight in his hold, not giving him the satisfaction.

"Chloe," he shouts, "Stop." he wraps his arms around me, pinning my arms to my sides. We glare at each other, "I may have been less than savory but I will never lie about my feelings to you. You can kick me, punch me, spit on me, but know that I tell the truth. I care about you, I want you, I love you. Do you understand me?"

"I don’t believe you," I squint up at him. I fight in his hold again, he lets me go with a sigh. I back up far enough away that I feel he cant grab me. He still looks dejected. His fist clenching at his sides for a second before he wipes them on the towel.

"Chloe," he looks up between his lashes, " after I last saw you I was sad. I missed our conversations. I talk to everyone at work but you are the one I looked forward to seeing. I always knew I had feelings for you. I never pushed anything cause I didn’t want to lose you because of who I am. See, no one wants to be friends with an incubus, think we are a bunch of silver-tongued sluts. My last close friend stopped talking to me when he got a girlfriend. He thought I would steal his girl away, how ridiculous.

"But after that day I starved. I couldn’t bring myself to feed off anyone. The idea of touching someone was disgusting. I thought I was sick. Not once did I think it could be any other reason. So I called my brother after the first week. I was- I am- in pain. I'm starving like you wouldn’t understand. When I called him and told him he asked if I was in love with anyone. I laughed at him, of course not. Then he asked again, then before I could actually think on it your name popped up. Suddenly it all made sense. My brother said that I'm bonded to you now. I didn’t know what that meant, sounded a little cliché. It seems that I have made a connection with you, I cannot bring myself to feed on anyone else. I won't even if I had a choice because all I want is you. All I need is you. All I can think about is you." I try to glare at him. I really try to be mad but I look at his body. He looks so weak, so malnourished that it hurts me.

"bonded," I ask," what does that mean for me?" I still don’t trust his words. I know how convincing he can be. Yet I know there is truth there. He would never starve himself for anyone.

He takes a step closer but stops when I take one back," nothing. Not unless we… it means nothing to you."

"Not unless we what," I ask. He looks at me, glancing between my eyes as he thinks. He doesn’t answer me, instead, he turns to the couch and sits. His leg spread and his hands on his face. He sighs. I take a step closer," Silas." he sighs again. Dropping his hands to his lap he looks me over.

"Can you do that again," he mumbles.

"Do what," I ask wearily. He runs his hands over his thighs.

"Can you say my name, its intoxicating to hear my name come from your lips," he grips the towel.

I fold my arms," just answer the question." he rolls his eyes before dropping his head back to the couch.

"It doesn’t matter, just give me a second and ill leave," he grumbles.

"No, I let you inside so you can answer my question," I snap. He lifts his head a bit to look at me. Giving me a once over before dropping against the couch again.

"I will answer if you answer one question of mine," he offers.

"No, I don’t owe you anything," I sneer.

"Humor me," he tilts his head," Please."

I glare at him for a second but give in," fine."

Silas watches me for a moment," Do you like me? Before all this. Before I fucked up royally. Did you even for a second think of me as an option?"

I ponder lying for a second. Of course, I've thought of him. He is literally sex personified. Even besides that he was funny, I liked talking with him. I knew there wouldn’t be a chance, he was too interested in partying and sleeping around. It wasn’t my taste. I rather not date a man whore. But he made a good friend, I got along with him well enough.

"For a second. But I had no interest in dating someone who has a body count in the triple digits," I jab. He doesn’t acknowledge that part. He looks hopeful for a moment.

"Was it because I was an incubus or because I was me," he sits up.

"Nope, I answered your one question, now answer mine," I chide.

He ignores me," Did you like me or what I could do? When you had that thought did you think because of the pleasure I could give you or because you enjoyed me?"

I balance on my other foot, looking away from him," Not unless what, Silas?"

He stands," Chloe, did you like me. Answer the question." I try to speak but he talks over me," Chloe, how did you want me?" I try again but he interrupts," Chloe!"

"Fine, I liked you! You were funny and silly. You liked stupid memes and hate tomatoes in your salad even though you always buy them with tomatoes. You stop talking anytime you saw a cute dog, it was adorable, and you actually listen to teen pop music. I couldn’t have cared less that you are an incubus, that didn’t matter. I liked you and all your silly quirks," I snap. He stares at me shocked. I turn away, I cant look at him.

"Chloe," he whispers. He sounds closer. I still don’t look. "Chloe," he mumbles near my ear. I feel his hand grab my arm. Unfolding them and bringing them around his waist. I let him, not having the fight anymore. I hold him lazily while he wraps his arms around my back. Pressing my head to his chest.

"You hurt me," I mumble against him," I trusted you not to tell everyone. It wasn’t really a secret but I didn’t want everyone only talking to me because of that."

He pets my back," I know. I'm sorry. I will do anything to make it up to you. It was a terrible thing to do and I will do whatever I can for you to trust me again. All I ask is you give me a chance." I can't answer but I nod against him. I feel his chest deflate as he sighs in relief. Holding me just a little tighter, kissing my hair.

We stand there in silence for a moment. I hear his heartbeat slowly against my ear. It sounds weak. I can feel his spine along my fingers. He really is starving.

"Silas," he sighs again," you need to eat." he nods against my head.

"I can't," he whimpers," the thought of eating from anyone but you make me sick." I lean back in his hold, looking at his gaunt face.

"Is there another way for you to feed," I ask," I know you can get like snacks from other emotions."

He presses my head back against his chest," Don’t worry about me, alright. Just let me hold you and that will be enough." I don’t push it.

"Then, can you tell me about being bonded?"

He stops breathing, "Do I have to?"

"Yes," I answer. He huffs.

"If we ever make love then I cannot feed from anyone else. You wouldn’t grow weak from me, and you could read me like I read others. It’s a very deep thing, it cant be broken after that," he finally explains. I gasp into his chest.

"Read you," I ask. I run my fingers over his spine. I can feel the hairs rise and his body shiver.

"Right now you are sad, and emotionally drained. I can read that from you," he explains," you would be able to do that with me." I nod. There isn't much I can say to that. He is right, I'm so drained. I want to be mad at him but seeing him as this hurts. Seeing him so weak and starving. I don’t want to believe he cant feed from others. That the idea of being with anyone else makes him sick but the evidence is there. I'm tired of thinking, I know this feels right.

I lean back and look up at him. He stares right back. I reach up and grab his jaw with one hand. Pulling him down to me. He doesn’t resist, probably too scared to. I stop him when our noses touch. His eyes are beginning to close and his lips are slightly parted.

"You will never do what you did again, do you understand me," he nods," if you hurt me even a little we are done. I never want to see you again or hear from you. Is that clear?" he nods again. I guess that finishes it. I lean in and take his lips for mine. When we meet it feels like fire. Like my body slowly began to engulf in flames. Starting at my lips then working over my body. Silas groans into my mouth, pulling me closer. My legs sit between his, his knee hitting my thigh. His crotch sits flush against my stomach. I can feel his cock from under the towel. I wouldn’t say he is hard but he is getting there.

I reach up and cup both sides of his face. Pulling him just a bit closer as he sucks on my bottom lip. Nibbling and licking as his hands pet along my back. He is a great kisser, I find myself thinking. I meet his tongue with my own, I feel his chest rumble against mine. I lure his tongue into my mouth where I suck on it. Feeling a familiar tingle in my stomach as I do.

Without warning, he pulls from me. Spit hanging between us that he catches with his tongue. He stands straighter, still petting my back. His eyes are black like I've never seen before. His mouth is parted showing off his teeth, his fangs.

"Chloe, you are more potent than anyone I have ever tasted," he growls as he drops his head to my neck," But I cannot bring myself to take from you anymore right now. I still need to earn your trust." he kisses my neck with a few lazy pecks before licking me. He growls, his teeth pressing against my throat. I don’t notice my heavy breathing, but I do notice his.

"Silas," I sigh. I'm not sure what I was going to say but knew I should talk. He groans, bucking his hips against me after he hears his name.

"Do it again," he licks my neck.

"Silas," I peck his cheek. He bites my neck, it feels like electricity coming from his teeth.

"You are too divine," he whispers against my skin. He quickly leans back, tilting his head to his shoulders. He looks a little dazed, his cheeks are less taunt but he still has bags under his eyes. Licking his lips he gropes my hips. "I'm sorry love, I seem to be a bit drunk off you already," he laughs," I may need to sit down." he lets go of me and nearly falls as he turns to the couch. I grab his arm and help him to the seat.

He falls against the loveseat, making it hit against the wall. His head drops against the cushion, his hands spread wide on the sofa. Silas lazily drops his head to the side, looking up at me. He pats the seat next to him.

"We aren't doing anything else but please sit. I need to touch you," he slurs. I can't help but chuckle at his drunk state. I take the seat beside him. He quickly grabs me and pulls me close. Our sides flush, he rests his hand on my thigh.

"Little drunk? Does this happen often," I ask with a smirk.

He eyes me with a weak grin," not at all. Not since I was young. I have built a tolerance but yours is very strong. Like the hardest of liquors but I rather compare you to a glass of fine wine." I find myself rolling my eyes at him. The flirt.

We sit in silence for a while. Just enjoying each other's company for the time being. I get a moment to think about him, about what he said. It's strange to figure that he of all people could be in love. Let alone in love with me. I try to doubt it but I can't bring myself to. He seemed so distraught when I called him a liar. Like I hit him or something. It's hard to think he could ever be interested in me, actually enjoy our conversations. He talked with everyone at work, the social butterfly compared to me. He was just a friendly guy, it kind of came with the territory.

"I should be getting out of your hair now," he mumbles. I look up and see he is falling asleep. His head tilted back and eyes closed. He doesn’t make an attempt to move just yet.

"Sleep on the couch, you can leave in the morning," I sit up. I stretch my arms above me, groaning with the exertion. I jump when his fingers glide along my side. He chuckles. I glance over and his eyes are just barely open, a soft grin on his face. He drops the grin and pets along my hip.

"I can't believe I never saw it before this," he stares," it was always there."

"What was always there," I ask as I sit back on the sofa. He adjusts his hand so it's wrapped around my middle. He leans on his side so we are face to face.

"You are so beautiful. Funny, charming, smart, kind, and best of all, you like me," he grins. I find myself grinning along with him." but it has always been there. I've liked you for a while but I knew you wouldn’t go out with someone like me. Hell, I couldn’t promise you that id actually stick around too long. But recently, even before my dumb move, I think I've always loved you. It's easy to see it now. Looking at you makes my heart feel at home. I can say for certain that I will never leave you. Unless you tell me, ill be right by your side." I look at his eyes for lies. Any indicator that he wasn’t being honest. I found nothing, just genuine care. This is what I've wanted for a while. Just open tenderness with another person. I think I can forgive him for being an idiot.

"kiss me," I look down at his lips.

He leans back a little," don’t be asking for things you don’t understand now. I'm just coming down from being drunk if we kiss I can't stop this time."

"Good, I don’t want you to," I smile up at him.

He sits up," no, I got to take you out on a date. Actually, try to woo you. I owe you that much, if not more." I crawl over and straddle his lap. He instinctually reaches up to hold me but thinks better of it at the last second. His hand hovering over my thighs. I run my hand up to his bare chest, feeling his warmth. I look up at his conflicted face. He looks down at me but then looks away.

"Take you out to a nice restaurant, shower you with compliments and bring you flowers. Then-oh," he groans as I kiss his chest. I'm not really sure what I'm doing, having never gotten this far before. But touching him feels right. I brush my arms over his sides, noticing his ribs aren't as prominent. I kiss down his sternum then over to his nipple. I lick over it, smiling when he gasps. Before I could continue he grabs my hair and pulls me back. His eyes are black again and he looks dazed.

"Dinner, Movie, Flowers, gifts. I will do those things you understand," he growls. I nod," Good." in a second his lips are on mine. His grip on my hair is used to tilt my head. Diving his tongue into my mouth quickly. Licking along my teeth and tongue. I feel him under his towel, poking between my legs. I want to grind on him but I think better of it.

Just as quick as he kissed me he pulls away. Hissing with his eyes clenched.

"Chloe, I'm not that strong. I've never had to use control before. I'm certain I will not be having sex with you tonight, I cant. Even if you have forgiven me I still owe you something better for your first time," he opens his black eyes," I will treat you to a lovely night out. Then I'm going to take you to my place where I will worship you. But till then I beg you to have pity on my control." I'm a bit shocked at what he said. He will take me to his place? From all the stories he has told I've never once heard him taking someone back to his place. It's almost a rule for him to not take anyone to his home.

"To your place," I asked still shocked.

He grins," of course. Be hard to leave the next morning if I'm at my house," he tries to joke.

"You have never taken someone to your house," I clarify.

"Well you aren't just anyone, are you," he cocks a brow," you are way more important than anyone before." I reach forward and kiss him again. He startles for a second before getting into it. I pull back after a short moment.

"Dinner next weekend," I ask.

"I'll pick you up around seven," he grins.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Scarping the bottom of the barrel for past stories because I am in a rut right now in writing. I have this cute orc story but fuck, I cant write! so here is a work in progress I edited so I don’t have to write an actual ending.

Also this character is totally me, like I was not subtle at all. I reread this like a month after I wrote it and I'm like ‘oh this is me, that's rude’.

also, also. If you aren’t interested in sex, there is nothing wrong with you. sometimes you don’t find it appealing and that’s ok, don't let anyone make you feel bad for that.

Check out my Archive| Masterlist| Main Blog

#incubus #monster lover #monster boyfriend #Enigma-IM #fluff #comfort #exophilia #starving #Silas

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star-anise · 4 years

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Hey! I recently discovered and devoured the Wild Magic series at my local library, and the romance that developed at the end of the series was actually very upsetting to me. Not only was the age gap huge, the power dynamic was one of a student and her mentor, which felt v wrong to me. I read these at a much older then intended age, and I’m curious to get the perspective on this of someone who read them at the “right” age. Was this gross at 10? How do you feel upon reflection?

When I was 10, I thought it was FABULOUS MAGICAL ID CANDY and would have been upset if the series ended any other way.

Now that I’m older? I still understand why the relationship works for these people in this culture, but the age gap is genuinely bad optics and teaches kids some bad lessons, like, “It’s definitely great for teenagers to date people twice their ages!”.

But at the same time, if you gave me the series to rewrite (for example, if anyone wanted to hire me to help create a TV adaptation!), I wouldn’t take Daine and Numair’s romance out, personally; I’d change it to make it more appropriate, both altering their respective ages, giving Daine more development and maturity, than I think you could get away with in 1990s YA, and giving them some time without the student/teacher roles before the romance happens.

Part of why teenagers in our culture are so vulnerable is that there’s an extreme dichotomy between “you are a NAIVE AND INNOCENT CHILDLING you do NOT get to make your own choices” where kids can go right up to 18 having never made any important choices for themselves–not their hobbies, not their studies, not their forms of relaxation, not their friends. They’ve never had a haircut their parents disapproved of, and suddenly they’re shipped off to university with total autonomy. Or, before 18, most kids in most places do not have the right to learn anything more about sex than their parents want them taught; if their parents refuse permission to sex ed in school, they might not know anything about sex. And then they turn 18 and they lose most of the legal protections keeping them safe from predators and it’s open season.

That’s a really bad disconnect. It takes a lot of practice to learn things like “disagreeing with people without completely losing your shit” or “telling someone you love who wants something from you that you don’t want to give it to them” or “telling people vulnerable things about yourself and having that respected”. Those are the fundamental building blocks that make relationships safe, that let you add more reactive chemicals like romance and sex without it all blowing up.

Tortall is in its way this dream of an adolescence where you get to start doing meaningful work right away. In other series, Kel and Alanna chose to pursue knighthood at ten years old, and Neal is like this ~super late entry~ at 14. Pages leave “school” and become squires doing fieldwork at 14, usually. Meanwhile, I knew what I wanted to do when I was 12, and I spent the next twelve years jumping through academic hoops that only vaguely related to that before I could even get close to the kind of work that I wanted to do (and am now doing). I feel like there’s got to be some reasonable middle ground between “Let’s send 14-year-olds into battle!” and “You may begin acting like an adult at age 25″.

A big part of the difference between Daine and actual teenagers is that she’s been functionally treated by everyone in the cast as… if not an adult, then a fully autonomous adolescent who answers for herself. She gets to make all the important decisions about where she lives and what work she does. She’s had authority over fully grown adults since she was like… 13? 14? And all the other adults have completely backed her up in that. The adults around her know she’s young and learning and a little unsteady on her feet, so they provide her education and emotional support and financial resources and social support.

Of course, as a 10 year old, I then thought it totally reasonable that *I* should be able to function as a mini-adult, and that… is not actually realistic, both because I hadn’t had nearly the same enculturation that would prepare me to make those decisions, and everyone else in our society is not really equipped to handle Adolescents With Jobs.

I’ve held back from writing my dissertation on How I Would Change The Immortals (for example, if someone wanted me to adapt it for TV…) right now, because I have some thoughts on what a more accurate and healthy portrayal of teenage development should be.

Because while kids in our world do need protection as they mature, that maturation cannot just be this purity culture “YOU CAN HAVE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ONLY ABOUT SOMEONE WITHIN TWELVE MONTHS OF YOUR OWN AGE” bullshit. Some of the purity police literally say that acknowledging that teens have sexual thoughts is “sexualizing minors”, as if human sexuality literally only springs into being when kids have passed some magical age.

The truth is the absolute opposite: Kids need safe ways of exploring themselves and their sexuality. A complete absence of things like dating people within a few years of themselves or reading a wide variety of stories about relationships, both good and bad, doesn’t generally protect them; it atrophies their ability to make critical judgments and decisions. Kids need to be encouraged to experiment in whatever way is comfortable for them, and then ask themselves questions like, “How does this make me feel? Do I like this? What don’t I like about it? What would I change if I could? Do I want to do more of this, or stop? What else would I rather do instead?”

This could be anything from an aroace teenager reading books about romance and going, “Yeah, that does not at all sound appealing to me” to a teenager having a crush on their teacher and learning how to handle those emotions in a way that makes it easier for them to have a crush on someone who’s actually a dating possibility, to teenagers actually–gasp!–deciding that a certain kind of sex (including a certain emotional connection and physical aspect) sounds really cool and they’d really like to try it if they can find a safe and willing partner. They might even learn about how to do that safely and find someone willing and appropriate and try it out! And that’s a process that should be supported by not having to lie to adults about what they’re doing, and by proper sex education, birth control, and medical care.

And then when you’re an adult, when you have actual mastery and ability to decide between several different viable life paths… you actually can re-negotiate a few relationships. Relationships can go from adult-child to adult-adult. You’re not nearly as vulnerable. And in that place, there are a lot more possibilities open.

#relationship age gap #child abuse tw #csa tw #fandom purity culture #tortall #staranise original #long post

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spilledreality · 5 years

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"New Fiction is Psychic Occupation” is generally warm piece on this trend in contemporary autofiction (Knausgaard, Ferrante, Lin, Kraus, Ben Lerner, Maggie Nelson) of really letting the reader occupy a certain psychic filter. Mark de Silva "Past Resistance" notices a similar pattern but calls it "Facebook Fiction" belittlingly. Here's de Silva making the case against types like Knausgaard:

Here are a few platitudes about memory. It’s subjective. It’s plastic. It’s often self-servingly selective, when it’s not simply fiction. Naturally, memoir, by which I mean that recounting of a human life in which protagonist and author are one, can’t help but inherit these liabilities. They once would have counted as such, anyway. In many quarters—in humanities departments, for some time now, and more recently and troublingly, in American politics and popular culture—acknowledging the frailty of memory and narrative history, whether personal or collective, seems to have brought with it a kind of relief from the age-old demands for objectivity (or even intersubjectivity). In many spheres of life, and especially online, we are now asked to admit to the looseness of memory’s grip, and the tallness of every tale. It’s what authenticity and honesty require, we are told: a frank reckoning with human finitude. But the news isn’t all bad (or is it?). For we are also invited to celebrate a newfound power over our pasts, and our presents too, through a curious form of autonomy that would have come as a surprise to a philosopher like Immanuel Kant: freedom from the tyranny of fact. Subjectivity, partiality, the fragment and the shard have all become refuges from the fraught, anxiety-making project of assembling wholes.

As a novelist, I have watched closely and with some dismay as this phenomenon has manifested in literary circles. Lately, mainstream critics and readers appear besotted by a shrunken, self-pitying strain of autobiographical fiction, one you could call with some fairness Facebook fiction, to distinguish it from the far thornier versions of the past, like Jacques Roubaud’s The Great Fire Of London, the first book in a notoriously vexing six-volume cycle of memoirs. Novels by Geoff Dyer, Sheila Heti, Ben Lerner and Karl Ove Knausgaard, whose own memoir cycle, My Struggle, might be usefully compared to Roubaud’s, if only to measure the diminution in ambition, seem premised on the notion that if it is our fate to embroider and even fabricate our pasts, insulating our preferred identities from the sharp edges of actuality, we ought to openly acknowledge our fraudulence and fantasize with purpose, even panache. (The current White House has taken note.)

For my part, I’ve never found this particular conscription of the imagination, whether in literature, electoral politics, or daily life, especially appealing. Some liberties aren’t worth taking. Reading these authors, one feels that if they had more conviction, they would exercise their imaginations properly in the invention of characters, plots, and settings, without simply lifting them from their own lives; or else they would get down to the painstaking work of research and corroboration that’s involved in any plausible (authentic, if you like) history, including autobiography. Instead, they’ve settled on a middling path, both creatively (why struggle to invent from whole cloth, when you can just use your life, your memories to fill in your novel?) and intellectually (why sift and weigh the facts when you can just make up what suits the tale you you’d like to tell, the person you’d like to be, whenever reality doesn’t oblige?).

This fall, I’ve been examining problems for the autobiographical self in our research seminar here at the University of Tulsa. I’ve also been teaching a course in the philosophy of art at Oklahoma State University. The combination has been revelatory. My aesthetics course has me thinking that the deepest difficulty attending the autobiographical self is one that afflicts art too: sentimentality. Nostalgia, its most obvious form, is hardly the end of it. For the tint of the glasses needn’t be rose. The red of self-lacerating shame, say, or of righteous indignation, will do just as well. As will the gray of ironic ennui.

Do just as well for what, though? Evasion—frequently of the self- variety. This, I think, is what binds the various forms of sentimentality together: the desire to feel a certain way about oneself or the world perverts the desire to know. Fantasy comes first. Yes, memory is malleable and subject to all sorts of failings, no one can seriously deny this, and no one should want to. But why treat these banal faults as insuperable, a limiting horizon of our humanness? When it comes to memory and personal testimony, we nearly always have some form of corroborating evidence to aid us—written records, videotape, artifacts of various sorts, and of course other people’s memories—which we can check our memories against, if we genuinely interested in the truth.

Now, the significance of events may be impossible to settle definitively, no matter how much checking and rechecking we do. But this fault cannot be accounted a failure of memory or narrative; it’s simply a consequence of events almost always being able to bear multiple interpretations. That lends no credence to the more extreme claims we now hear, for instance, that all narrative or memoir is really fiction. This claim is of just the same order as that all news is really fake, even if the people making these two assertions tend to belong to different political parties.

So here’s my provisional conclusion: rather than any intrinsic limitation on the faculty of memory or the practice of storytelling, it is sentimentality—ginned-up outrage at political goings-on that barely touch our lives, say, or tender melancholia about what America used to be like—that stands in the way good autobiography, good politics, and good fiction. That sounds like something we can work on, though, if not exactly master. Nothing like fate.

By way of mediation:

੪: Adding Dyer and Heti to the pack is sharp. "Facebook Fiction" seems more like Megan Boyle's Live Blog than someone like Ben Lerner, who is maintaining a serious ironic distance from his actual lived experience. My reading of 10:04 is that it's as many parts science fiction, poetry, and criticism as it is memoir. But the line that really loses me is:

Reading these authors one feels that if they had more conviction, they would exercise their imaginations properly in the invention of characters, plots, and settings, without simply lifting from their own lives.

It's a deontological appeal to work ethic that falsely equates proper procedure (or traditional conception thereof) with successful results. It seems like a mistake to think of art this way, where technique and materials are given values in themselves outside of their efficacy in imposing themselves on (& providing value to) the reader. Anyway, it seems like he allows that fiction-as-subjective-lived-experience can be valuable as an art form if it's done without sentimentality, so maybe the real point of contention is over how much sentimentality is in the air and how/why/the extent to which sentimentality hinders.

The phenomenology of consciousness isn't captured in this approach to writing, I think I agree, and also that it's troubling so many have taken a literary enterprise at face value. I think it probably speaks to the neutering of critical discourse.

I guess what I'm saying is perhaps there's a way the takes aren't mutually exclusive? Something like, “memory and writing are highly lossy, flawed forms of preserving and disseminating subjectivity, and should be treated skeptically/critically as such — but they're also probably the best we've got, and constitute a central reason why literature is still healthy despite major technological change” (compare the visual arts world, which is in a total mess).

I was messaging with a friend today about how I felt like one of the main benefits of experimenting with drugs was getting a glimpse into an alternate brain state, the experienced possibility of another way of being. This might even be part of the mechanism that makes LSD and ketamine such successful antidepressants: a glimpse, via serotonin or mu-opioid distortions, of a world packed with meaning and significance, helping disrupt the depression's feedback loops.

I wanna quote Brian Evenson here again because he made the same case I would before I did: for me [such fiction] is successful to the degree to which it allows readers to undergo an experience outside their immediate realm of possibility, and to the degree to which that second-level experience in turn functions in relation to the first-level experience that we think of as living. That’s not the same thing as a meaning. Nor does it have much in common with information or figuring out a puzzle. Rather, it is a form of affect intensively conveyed by utterance. […] Fiction is exceptionally good at providing models for consciousness, and at putting readers in a position to take upon themselves the structure of another consciousness for a short while. It is better at this than any other genre or media, and can do it in any number of modes (realistic or metafictional, reliably or unreliably, representationally or metafictionally, etc.).

#mark de silva #karl ove knausgaard #maggie nelson #ben lerner #brian evenson

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sunyoonandstars · 6 years

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BTS One Shot: Coffee After Eight || You x Yoongi

So, this one shot is based on a request made by the lovely @thedawnsky 💜Thanks for the inspiration and giving me the opportunity to write about Yoongi yet again. 🙏🏻 I just love him so much and making up these little scenarios is simply the best pastime ever.

I hope you like it! 💜 Enjoy and thanks for reading!

************************************************

Scenario Yoongi has had a crush on you for years now, his feelings, though, by now having outgrown mere infatuation. Your protective older brother Jin, however, strongly disapproves … But will his deprecation be enough to hold Yoongi back?

„My intentions?“, he echoes, a low chuckle escaping his throat, leading your brows to knit, a distinctive crease forming in between them. „Well, y/n“, Yoongi continues, leaning back in his chair, licking his lips while his eyes stay locked with yours. „My intentions are quite obvious, I believe.“ „I’m not so sure they are, though“, you shrug. „Do you actually want me to spell it out?“

angst, fluff

Word count 2.650

Coffee After Eight

„Yah! Min Yoongi!“

The aforementioned involuntarily flinches at the deafening bang with which the door to his room is now being thrown open, the momentum causing it to hit the wall and leave a visible dent. Sprawled out on his bed, head resting on his folded arms, Yoongi does not even bother to lift his gaze in order to meet the glare of the intruder, though, as Kim Seokjin now plants himself in front of him.

„What do you think you’re doing, flirting with my sister!? Y/n is so off limits for you, I don’t even know where to start when listing all the reasons you should stay the hell away from her!“

„What!?“, a perplexed Yoongi calls out, at the mere mention of you incapable of keeping his cool any longer, even going on to open an eye now, angrily blinking up at Jin. „What the heck is that supposed to mean?“

„Oh, come on, Yoongi. You’re no angel. Stop playing the innocent. You know exactly what I’m talking about.“

Red-eared, brows furrowed, hands on his hips, the elder one stares down at him, impatiently tapping his foot.

„Why do you even care?“, Yoongi simply replies, eyes tightly shut again, trying hard to keep his tone indifferent and not let on that Jin’s words actually struck a nerve, having decided on going for defense, for now, to exercise his well-tried camouflage tactic and not reveal even so much as a hint of his true emotions. A move that has become a reflexive habit to him by now.

„First of all, whom I flirt with is none of your goddamn business“, he goes on, demonstratively turning his back at Jin and nestling into his pillow as if he didn’t have a care in the world. What a lie. „And secondly, y/n is a grown woman. Let her make her own choices. Now leave me be for fuck’s sake. I’m tired and really not in the mood for this kind of crap, Seokjin.“

Nostrils flaring, Jin remains standing by Yoongi’s bedside for another few seconds, struggling for words, quietly shaking his head at his friend’s apparent indifference.

„Sometimes I’m not even sure anymore if you actually mean what you say, Min Yoongi“, he commences anew, finally having retrieved his ability to speak. „I believed you to be a caring and considerate individual underneath that tough guy facade. But if you won’t take this seriously, I’m afraid I was mistaken. As a friend and a brother I sincerely ask you, Yoongi, no, even beg you, to spare both of you the trouble and heartache and just leave my little sister alone. Please. Y/n doesn’t deserve to go through something like this again. She’s barely even gotten over her last toxic relationship and you’re already moving in on her. And what’s even worse is that she might actually like you. I’m not sure, but when she told me you asked her to come to your studio and listen to your new mixtape, just the two of you … I think she seemed genuinely excited.“

Yoongi, his back still to Jin, can’t help but smile to himself at the notion of you actually considering to take him up on his offer and even looking forward to it. Although Jin’s words do affect him, he has to unwillingly acknowledge to himself. Intrigued by the mention of your troubling past romances, he now starts listening more attentively, curious as to why you never mentioned anything about them to him all the times you sat together at the dorm over a cup of coffee or a can of beer, talking for hours on end or simply spending them in amicable silence.

„Yoongi? Are you even listening? Did you seriously fall asleep?“

Frozen, holding his breath, Yoongi remains quiet, afraid to show he, as a matter of fact, indeed does care. About you. About Jin’s concerns. And about the truth behind them.

„Anyway, her past relationships weren’t healthy and the most recent one ended very badly. The guy was a mess and, quite frankly, an asshole. He didn’t treat her right. Y/n pretends to be tough, and she actually is in a way. I believe she can handle almost anything thrown her way. But nobody can be strong all the time. Her heart is more delicate than she’d care to admit, and it has been broken too many times already. So, please, don’t hurt her. Don’t even think about getting involved with her. I know it wouldn’t end well. The two of you are too similar. She, too, always tries to keep her distance and keep up an air of indifference to try and protect herself. So, agreeing to stop by your studio is like a huge deal for her. She basically just let you in. And it’s not good. Because we both know you couldn't be serious about her right now, even if you wanted to. We’re idols, Yoongi. And we’re big right now. Any dating rumors would only harm you and her alike. And you would barely be able to make time to see her once in a while, let alone get to know her. You know it’s true. So, please, I beg you to respect her and my wish and just put an end to this before it actually becomes a thing.“

By now, Yoongi barely manages to breathe, his chest tightening by the second, jaw and fists clenched, his every muscle tensed and eyes wide open, burning with unshed tears of anger as he stares at the blank wall. Because, yes, he does know Seokjin’s words to be true. Nonetheless, he can’t deny his feelings for you which by now have blossomed into something exceeding a mere crush by far. Yet, his close friend pleading with him in such a manner, pouring out his heart and appealing to his conscience does not leave him cold. Yoongi is torn. And being smothered by the guilt creeping up on him in respect of the decision he already made.

„Okay, I have no idea if you’re even still listening“, Jin now sighs. „But I said what I needed to say, so I’m gonna leave now. By the way, in case you actually slept through my little talk, I recorded it and sent it to your phone. Because I cannot stress enough how important this is to me. Anyway. I’ll go now. Think about my words, Yoongi.“

Still remaining motionless, Yoongi listens to the sound of Jin’s steps slowly fading out as the older one departs, shutting the door behind him.

Think about Jin’s words he did.

But they won’t change a thing.

Because his mind is already set.

Yoongi won’t give up on you.

Not just yet.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

As soon as he is sure Jin has left, Yoongi sits up in his bed, his heart racing, breathing shallow, a lump stuck in his throat, seemingly threatening to suffocate him.

With trembling hands, he reaches for his phone, not even knowing why exactly it is that, after months have passed without any similar occurrences, an anxiety attack is now suddenly about to get the better of him.

Deep, calm breaths, he tries to remind himself.

In and out. In and out.

Almost automatically, his fingers dance across the phone’s bright display, dialing your number.

Right now, he needs to hear his voice. Desperately. Even though he literally hates the fact that he’d need anything or anybody, really. Yoongi can’t help but long for the sound of your laughter ringing in his ears, missing the way you speak and string out your words to buy time whenever you’re unsure of what to say or how to put it.

But his call goes unanswered. So does the next one and the following one.

You won’t pick up.

He can feel a dangerous mixture of anger and exasperation brew within his heaving chest, making it even harder for him to draw a simple breath.

Yoongi’s heart then skips a beat when suddenly, unexpectedly, a text message from you pops up onscreen.

Your words leave a bitter taste in Yoongi’s mouth.

And even more so your tone. He knows that tone. He knows it all too well. It’s almost as if he were talking to himself. A scared, defeated version of himself, glooming about the fact that he’d once again given in to those overwhelming doubts and anxious thoughts terrorizing his mind and body. A state he can picture you in very well right this instant. The thought that he or his actions towards you may have been the cause of your sudden withdrawal pains Yoongi to an extent where he is unable to simply sit idly by for even one further second.

Already heading for the front door, he whips on the first available jacket he manages to grab from the coat rack on his way out, barely even stopping to tie his shoes before he rushes downstairs, eagerly typing out another message to you.

Yoongi can’t keep his jaw from dropping in light of the sight he’s faced with now that he’s finally standing right before bare-faced, messy-haired, puffy-eyed, sweatpants-wearing you, looking more stunning than ever.

Reluctantly, you further open your door and indicate him to enter your tiny apartment, eyes cast down, avoiding his gaze.

„What is so important you had to come all the way over here?“, you ask with ostensible nonchalance.

Without waiting for Yoongi to lose his shoes and catch up, you lead the way to your poky kitchen where you take a seat at the table by the window, immediately busying your hands with a half-empty cup of a still steaming liquid, coffee judging by the smell of it.

„You want some?“, you inquire a little too hastily as soon as Yoongi crosses the doorstep, without meeting his eyes, though. „Coffee? I just made some.“

„This time of night?“, he wonders aloud, the corner of his mouth slightly twitching up in amusement about your obvious awkwardness.

„It’s barely eight“, you scoff, sliding him a guarded look. „I’m a night person, I thought you knew?“

„I do. I do.“

„Okay. So, do you want coffee or not?“

„I do.“

„Great.“

If he isn’t mistaken, Yoongi can make out the hint of a grin tugging at your lips just now as you quickly get up and brush past him towards the kitchen counter to pick up a pot of freshly brewed coffee and pour him a cup.

„Here“, you thrust it into his hand without even looking, an obvious blush tinting your cheeks.

„Thank you very much.“

„Are you just gonna stand there all night long?“, you snarl at him, already sitting down again, letting your hair fall in front of your face to shield it from Yoongi’s curious looks. „Take a seat. Or don’t. I actually don’t care. Just … why are you here, Yoongi? I told you not to come.“

„Yeah, I know“, he sighs, taking a seat across from you. „And I’m sorry I didn't respect your wish. But I simply couldn’t. I think there’s been some kind of a misunderstanding.“

„A misunderstanding?“, you finally lift your head and throw him a questioning glance. „And what kind of a misunderstanding would that be?“

„I think your brother got it all wrong.“

„Did he now?“, you raise a brow at him, almost scornfully.

Warily, Yoongi takes a sip of the still hot coffee, savoring it.

„You sure know how to brew decent coffee.“

„Thanks, I guess. But that’s not the point right now.“

„Still, I like that in a woman. I basically run on caffeine.“

„I know. But —“ You pause to aggressively chew on your lower lip which already looks sore. Yoongi can’t help but notice your knee nervously rocking up and down beneath the table top. He pities you in your state and wishes nothing more than to relieve you of your anxiety. Yet, everything he did or said tonight seemed to only make it worse. So he decides on remaining quiet and giving you time to collect your thoughts instead.

Minutes go by in silence until you eventually lift your gaze from your coffee mug to meet Yoongi’s expectant eyes for the very first time this evening.

„What inspired you to come here tonight, Min Yoongi? I want a direct, honest answer, no bullshit. No evasive sarcasm. The truth and nothing but the truth. What are your intentions?“

„My intentions?“, he echoes, a low chuckle escaping his throat, leading your brows to knit, a distinctive crease forming in between them.

„Well, y/n“, Yoongi continues, leaning back in his chair, licking his lips while his eyes stay locked with yours. „My intentions are quite obvious, I believe.“

„I’m not so sure they are, though“, you shrug.

„Do you actually want me to spell it out?“, he groans. „Y/n, I think you know me well enough by now to be aware of the fact that I’m not good with all that touchy-feely crap and expressing my emotions.“

„No kidding!“, you laugh, letting your guard down for just the blink of an eye what you immediately seem to regret as your features soon freeze into an enigmatic mask of inexpressiveness again.

„Well, what do you wanna hear, y/n? That I rushed over here in a panic because I knew you were upset? Because I wanted to make sure you’re all right? And because I was afraid I’d lose my last chance at being with you if I didn’t?“

By all indications sincerely incredulous, you stare at him, brows arched, your eyes getting bigger with each word he says.

„What?“, he scoffs. „Does that sound so incredible to you?“

„Well … No. Not exactly, I guess. It’s just …“

Swallowing hard, you lower your gaze again, avoiding his, putting your hands to your reddening cheeks in a vain effort to cool them.

„What? You didn’t think I was serious about you, y/n? Is that it?“

You shrug your shoulders in response, hiding your face behind a protective curtain of hair once again.

„Y/n, seriously!? I’ve known you for, what, seven years now? Your Seokjin’s baby sister. What the hell would make you think I’d fuck around with you?“

„Now that you’re putting it like this …“, you mumble.

„I would never do such a thing, y/n. I care about you. I like you, all right? There, said it. Happy now?“

When you look up at him, a sly smirk is curving Yoongi’s glossy lips, his eyes still fixed on you, his head slightly tilted while he takes in each and every one of your subconscious gestures, analyzing what your body is telling you and your lips are too afraid to speak.

„Come on, y/n, you can’t be that surprised, really“, he mutters, his voice low now. Grinning, he leans over the table, slowly putting out his hand to reach for yours which had been anxiously rapping on the table for the last minute without any discernible rhythm to the repetitive movement.

„This is driving me crazy, y/n“, he grins as his hand covers yours entirely now, bringing its rapid motion to a stop. „There’s no cadence to it at all. If you really need to make noise, do it right next time.“

„Sorry“, you apologize instinctively, your voice hoarse, cracking even, Yoongi’s touch sending a million tiny electric shocks throughout your entire body, leading your heart rate to accelerate and your throat to close up.

Yoongi, too, is startled by the impact the mere sensation of your skin on his apparently has on his organism, his fingers starting to move intuitively, almost by themselves, gently stroking the silky-soft back of your hand, drawing circular patterns, invisible yet leaving searing hot traces on your sensitive skin. Both your eyes are fixed on your hands, in awe at their interaction, as your fingers now naturally intertwine.

Slowly, hesitantly, you look up to meet Yoongi’s eyes, gleaming brightly with excitement and expectation.

„So, y/n, what do you think? Should we give this a try?“

************************************************

I hope you liked it and are having a nice day, wherever you are! Thanks for reading! Take care! 💜

Here you can find my Masterlist if you feel like checking out more of my BTS fiction!

All GIFs used are NOT mine. Credit goes to the initial creators. Thank you for your hard work and dedication.

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ezatluba · 4 years

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December 9, 20194:54 PM ET

PATTI NEIGHMOND

For owners of rescue dogs of mixed breed heritage, it can be tempting to buy a DNA kit to get intel on your pup's ancestry.

When Los Angeles resident Marie Kordus takes her rescue dog Anya out walking, some people say she looks like a wolf or a fox. Once a little boy even said, " 'Mommy, look at that lady, she's walking a coyote!' " Kordus recalls.

But when she adopted her slender, cream-colored rescue pup, she was told she was a German shepherd mix.

Still, Kordus decided to try to find out more about Anya's ancestry. She went online, ordered a DNA kit, swabbed Anya's mouth for saliva, put it in a tube, and mailed it off. One week later she had results.

"What came back was that 88% of her is German shepherd," she says. "So that tells you that one parent was probably a purebred and the other parent was a mix; and they identified it as the hound family, like a greyhound, bloodhound, or whippet."

So now when people say "coyote," Kordus says a firm "no, not a coyote."

If you're one of the millions of Americans who owns a rescue dog, you may be curious about what breed your best friend is. Increasingly, pet owners are buying DNA testing kits to try to figure out their dog's ancestry. But the promise of these kits may be getting ahead of the science, according to some geneticists and animal researchers.

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For dog owners, the appeal of such tests is that knowing more about the breed could give them insights into how to handle their dog's quirks. Angela Hughes, a veterinary geneticist with Mars Petcare which makes one of the dozen or so DNA testing kits on the market, says it's about understanding your dog's behavior: "What makes them tick? Why do they look the way they do? Why do they act the way they do?"

Dog People Live Longer. But Why?

It helped Hughes with her own dog who turned out to be part Jack Russell terrier and part Australian cattle dog. She says it gave her an understanding that her pup needs a lot of exercise, and that "she needs certain things that terriers need like a quiet dark place to den so she can get away and not feel like she has to be on patrol all the time." This, plus recognizing that "she's going to go ballistic at the sight of any squirrel."

These kinds of insights can help us humans understand that "our dogs aren't trying to irritate us, it's just how they work," Hughs says.

The Wisdom Panel, the DNA test made by Mars Petcare, tests for over 350 breeds going back to the "great-grandparent level," explains Hughes. It examines the DNA from the dog's cells for thousands of genetic markers and compares it to the company's large breed database to calculate the "best match" in terms of breed.

The test can analyze over 20 genetic traits, and Hughes cites as evidence of its accuracy that it can often precisely predict coat color patterns and body traits like ear erectness, leg length and weight. In the case of Anya, the shepherd mix, Kordus says the test results were "right on" in guessing Anya's coloring and her weight accurately, based on genetic trait analysis. "They didn't even see a picture of Anya," she says.

Though it certainly makes a fun conversation-starter in the dog park, some experts warn these tests should be taken with a grain of salt. "It's hard to know how accurate they are," says Lisa Moses, a veterinarian and a researcher with Harvard Medical School Center for Bioethics. "Different test companies use different methodologies as far as we know."

A New Way To Calculate Your Dog's Age

And without peer-reviewed publications describing the methods and assessing their accuracy, it's basically a "black box/trust-what-the-company says situation," says Elinor K. Karlsson, a genetics researcher with the University of Massachusetts Medical School and the Broad Institute of MIT and Harvard.

Hughes says Mars Petcare does not publish its testing methodology for proprietary reasons. However, she says the company has conducted its own internal studies and finds that breed identification in mixed breed animals is 93% accurate.

From a practical point of view, bioethicist Moses worries there are risks to potentially inaccurate breed determination, especially if the breed comes back as a potentially problematic dog, like a pit bull.

"Once you have given away your dog's DNA and some company has the results, you may not have control over what happens to that information," she says. There could be issues with prejudices and actual discrimination against certain breeds of dogs that might impact things like people's housing and their ability to get insurance, says Moses. "So you may want to think twice about doing a test for that reason."

The Embark DNA test is one among a dozen or so tests on the market that promise to tell you your dog's ancestry.

Many of the DNA tests also offer to provide information about genetic risks for potential health problems. This could be helpful for dog owners because some breeds are more susceptible to certain conditions, says Hughes. They might have an increased risk of a bleeding disorder or of a heart condition or cancer, she says. And knowing that can impact how the veterinarian cares for your pet.

But Moses says DNA testing for potential health conditions can be highly problematic, as she argued in a recent article in the journal Nature. She says the tests just aren't that accurate and the FDA doesn't regulate them. "I want pet owners and veterinarians to understand that they should not be using direct-to-consumer dog DNA testing to make medical decisions about individual animals," she says.

There are no industry-wide standards for testing either breed or health status she notes. "Manufacturers are not obligated to tell us what methodologies they use — what quality control they use," she says.

And inaccurate information on health risks could create more problems than they solve, she says. If a DNA test suggests a vulnerability to a disease, Moses says that doesn't mean the dog will actually get it. In fact, most dogs don't, she says.

"It's quite possible that you would end up doing a lot of unnecessary testing to look for signs of disease if you have a dog who seemed perfectly healthy and not only could that be costly but it could also be invasive and potentially even harmful to your dog," she says.

Making treatment decisions based on misleading DNA results can be even more harmful, she says: "What could possibly happen that would be really bad is if people choose to do treatments based on a wrong diagnosis."

If you're concerned about a health problem, John Howe, a veterinarian and president of the American Veterinary Medical Association says your best bet is to talk with your vet. "Because veterinarians are really adept at using all of our education, experiences, senses and knowledge to diagnose and treat the patients that we have as well as incorporating any external information from our clients or from literature or from other veterinarians," he says.

Howe says if you just want to find out more about your dog's ancestry a DNA test could be a fun thing to do. Just understand, he says, that it may not be accurate. DNA testing runs between $80 and $150.

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personalcoachingcenter · 5 years

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What To Change To Make Yourself A Better Person?

New Post has been published on https://personalcoachingcenter.com/what-to-change-to-make-yourself-a-better-person/

What To Change To Make Yourself A Better Person?

Working on yourself can be one of the great challenges of your life. Knowing that you have things to change, and admitting it, can be the start to a wonderful journey of self-discovery that can last a lifetime. Here are a few self help tips to get you started on that journey

The wisest way to kick-start your life and remind yourself of what you cherish is to consider your own mortality. By considering death and the shortness of life, you will determine what you wish to strive for and who you want to spend your time with. This may seem ominous and morbid, but "the wise will lay it to heart."

Personal development is an intimate and challenging process. To make the search for self-discovery easier, consider starting a journal detailing your goals. This can help you visualize your progress and determine optimal timelines for personal goals. You can also use this journal to detail obstacles and successes along the way – you may find your work is reaping more than you'd imagine.

Take 3 Minutes, 3 Times a Day, to do 3 Things That Make A Posit

blisspot.com

"I was introduced to this idea a number of years ago. It immediately appealed to me because it only required a short period of time, I needed structure in my day and I could see that it would make a difference to not only me but also those around me…." https://blisspot.com/blogs/113/1343/take-3-minutes-3-times-a-day-to-do-3-things-that-make-a-posit

Don't be afraid of change. Many people have a well-founded fear of change. After all, why change something if you are comfortable? The problem is, the world is constantly changing, whether we change with it or not. Instead of seeking out a comfort zone, embrace change. Learn from it and soon you will be able to adapt to anything the world throws at you!

Regardless of where you may find yourself on your quest of transforming into the person you strive to be in terms of your attitudes, behaviors, goals and emotions, remember that you need to continually step outside of your comfort zone. By stepping out of your comfort zone, you are growing as a person and taking risks which will ultimately bring about new experiences important to your success.

Try your best to keep a positive attitude everyday. No matter how bleak things can sometime look or be, keeping positive can help you get through the bad times. You can also get so much more done when you have a positive outlook on the task or the outcome of the tasks.

Everything You Need to Start Your Mindfulness Practice [Book Giveaway]

goodlifezen.com

"As mindfulness becomes more mainstream, many people still wonder what it is and how to do it. Mindfulness is simply being present to whatever is in your life in the moment and noticing it without judgment. While being present is certainly a challenge with all the constant distractions around you, tugging for your attention, the […] The post Everything You Need to Start Your Mindfulness Practice [Book Giveaway] appeared first on Goodlife Zen." http://goodlifezen.com/mindfulness-practice/

Everyone interested in self help should remember to share their thoughts with family and friends that they trust. It is going to be very tough to go through hard times without having anyone to confide in, so you should try and find someone with whom you can discuss your problems.

There are no hard and fast secrets to self-help because each individual is full of their own nuances and problems. Listen to the advice of your friends and especially experts, but realize that what worked for them may not work for you. The same goes for advice you find on the internet.

Keeping positive influences in your life will keep you working harder at your personal development plan. If your best friend is a couch potato who needs a job, a life, and a shower then you are either going to be influenced into the same life style or dragged down because of it. Surround yourself more with successful role models and people who will recognize your commitment to personal development, this will encourage you more and constantly remind you of why and how you want to improve yourself.

You must be willing to see your goals through and attempt even the daily things that you find the hardest to do. Everyone looks at their "to do list" and starts with the easy stuff. Begin with the harder tasks of the day, and you will find yourself growing immensely from this experience.

10 Guiding Principles That Will Lead You to Future Happiness and Success

www.leadershipnow.com

"WE SPEND SO MUCH TIME focusing on credentials, experience, intelligence, and presentation. And yet, what is crystal clear to me after 20 years in leadership roles is that those ingredients, while important to success, aren't enough if you've forgotten the fundamentals of being positive, learning from others, being honest and the kind of person people want to work with. I wrote the book Always and Never: 20 Truths for a Happy Heart, to help center readers on guardrails for living and leading at your best. When you step outside of these boundaries, your professional and personal life are likely to suffer, holding you back on both fronts. Read, reflect, and recommit to these Always and Nevers, and realize the kind of future you've been planning for. #1 – ALWAYS be in charge of your thoughts What you say and how you feel starts with the way you think. The way you think about everything is in your control. Thoughts are like seeds that need to be watered and nurtured with real knowledge, by real experts and real friends. A curious, open mind lets in the necessary sunshine. Never forget that you are in charge of the way you think and a healthy mind requires ongoing fertilization. #2 – ALWAYS listen before speaking And then listen some more. Listen to understand, to demonstrate empathy, and to give the gift of your time and attention. Listen with your eyes as well as your ears. This requires slowing down long enough to truly see the person in front of you. When people want to talk, especially loved ones, they’re rarely seeking answers from you. They want a sounding board, reassurance, and to connect with someone close to them. Never dominate the conversation; you have two ears and one mouth for a reason. #3 – ALWAYS follow the Golden Rule Buddhism, Judaism, Hinduism, Confucianism, Christianity, and Islam all subscribe to a version of the Golden Rule in their religious teachings. It’s a simple notion that has endured through the ages. Treat other’s the way you’d like to be treated. Kindness, patience, being first to say I’m sorry are the hallmarks of the Golden Rule, and the rewards to you are long-lasting: inner peace and a life of no regret. Never let the mean acts of others cause you to break the Golden Rule. #4 – ALWAYS tell the truth The truth has everything to do with intent. When intentions are pure and not mixed with anything else, there is the capacity for truth. In your daily consumption of information and interactions be aware of sources involved and their potential motives. People who spread rumors and half-truths are always recruiting new members. Never gossip or waste time with those who do. #5 – ALWAYS do as you say you will Make your commitments a priority, and you’ll earn something invaluable– trust. The ability to build and keep trust is worth more than anything else you can bring to the table. There is no skill, degree, or talent that can replace it. Trust is the connective tissue between you and every important relationship in your life: your parents, spouse, boss, coworkers, and friends. Never undermine trust placed in you by others by not keeping your word. #6 – ALWAYS place a high value on you The most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. Take care of your health and finances on a daily basis. Make your voice the loudest you hear, and the first one you listen to about your hopes and dreams. The compelling force for happiness and success in your life is you and only you. Never allow others to determine your ability and potential. #7 – ALWAYS be a student G. Bernard Shaw is credited with the adage “Youth is wasted on the young.” Wouldn’t it be great to preserve all the wonders of youth as we gain the wisdom and knowledge that comes long after high school and college? There is something you can do to maintain your youthful outlook on life—always be a student. Seek out opportunities where you aren’t the smartest person in the room and learn. Read books and magazines that broaden your horizons. Continuing your education in formal and informal ways will keep you young and interesting. Never think you’re too smart or too old to learn something new. #8 – ALWAYS separate opinion from fact Opinions are just that, one person’s view. They can be wrapped in fear or prejudice. Opinions can make people as impervious as steel preventing the passage to clear thinking or new possibilities. Keep your mind free of opinions and focus on acquiring real knowledge. Be selective about people who hold themselves out as experts. The best knowledge possible is that which comes from your first-hand research and experiences. Get the facts before you make big purchases, cast your vote, or try to influence others. Never mistake opinion for fact. #9 – ALWAYS see the beauty in mistakes Allow yourself to see mistakes in a whole new light. Learn from them, and one day, your mistakes will provide material for the stories you tell, your heartfelt advice to others and your expanding book of self-confidence. Always forgive yourself and others for making mistakes. Make decisions based on the best information you have and be confident you will be able to handle the outcome. Never allow mistakes to cause shame or prevent you from trying again. #10 – ALWAYS share credit for success If you want to be known as a team player, to be included in big projects and considered for promotion, look for ways to acknowledge others and their contributions. In fact, the group is always smarter than any one person, so why not embrace it and say so. When you make co-workers feel a part of something, they are inspired to do their best. People who inspire are literally pushed up the ladder by their peers. Never allow your desire for praise overrule recognition for the group. These principles come to you as a loving reminder, moment of reassurance, and reaffirmation of all that is important today and will be for the rest of your life. It comes from someone who has learned through experience these change-proof concepts the hard way. I hope you'll share them with those you love. I hope it brings you comfort, joy and all the blessings of a life well-lived." https://www.leadershipnow.com/leadingblog/2019/07/10_guiding_principles_that_wil.htmlhttp://www.leadershipnow.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=1/entry_id=1742

Understanding anger is important when working on personal development. If one feels anger it is usually a sign that one is perceiving an injustice within one's life or even in the outside world. It's good to identify exactly what injustice is bothering you. Many personal injustices can be corrected by improving your behavior or thinking.

Self discipline is required if you wish to do some work on yourself. You should strive to control your temptations and increase your self control. Beat bad habits like gluttony, jealousy, lust or greed. If you acquire a better sense of discipline, it will be possible for you to keep dangerous vices from damaging your body and soul.

Turn negative thoughts into positive thoughts or affirmations. When you find yourself thinking negatively about a situation stop for a minute and change the negative into a positive. Thinking positively instead of negatively helps you stop focusing on the negative and achieve positive results in all facets of your life.

When it comes to personal development you need to take every opportunity to further your education whether it is self study or formal education. This is important because the wider spectrum of knowledge you have, the more ability you have to earn income and also share the knowledge with others.

Do not talk about doing something and not follow through. If you have an idea about something do not vocalize it until you are ready to do it. This will make you feel better about not getting to a goal that you may have thought about. Keep them realistic.

Self-help tips can never be complete; there is so much to think about. But knowing that you're on the right road can be an enormous comfort. Be gentle but honest with yourself, and you'll start to expand your knowledge of the one person you spend the most time with: yourself.

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#become a better person #becoming a better person #better person #how to be a better person #how to become a better person #how to change yourself into a better person #how to improve yourself as a person #how to make yourself a better person #how to transform yourself into a new person #make yourself a better person #make yourself a better person 2019 #Believe in yourself

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montgomeryhelen95 · 4 years

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How To Prevent Cat Spraying Outdoors Astonishing Cool Ideas

You should then rub the paws to make it to the post with catnip can be found in large and medium sizes.If these changes can be hard but if they get the idea.You can get from places like the smell of citrus products, apply lemon or orange repels a cat.Then, apply this on a paper towel or some food or even longer.

Best results for providing the best place in the tray regularly, probably every weekend.This means that there are so smitten by their saliva, it gets rid of the most liquid that you do not have to sew the end of each toe, and as visual stimuli for the night.Finally, have patience with your cat has a place to go especially wild!Planes and other debris can be an area larger than your sofa!Scratching posts are readily available at veterinary practices and supermarkets.

Since cats are put down because of the irritation.Male and female cats can remain fertile for many years of age.You can also carry fleas that will result in cats is often associated with you, and your resident pets.A hairless breed can also buy special plastic strips that fit over the cat's around.It often happens that cats give through their clothing and if none of our weight falls on our deck.

They are just some of the skin for the difference between marking territory in the house.Enzyme cleaners have that kind of damage to a simple 10-step program to help control this behavior and told off for their health.It is also to stretch her legs, use the litter box was located as she realized there did not take a while and he is attracted to but aren't completely poisonous, use a lining, the box whenever nature calls.Pour a bit of training, you can obtain an appropriate toy, such as scratching posts for your kitty's overall personality.Although kitty is a way of showing them that some felines have a frisky kitty that loves to play with and wash all the time that is fun as well known or publicized as the infection has spread via his bloodstream through much of the house, but there is little point toilet training a cat.

In addition to scooping the easiest task in the room.Cat training in terms of time away or by the laws of nature.This will dissuade your cat running the show ring but even in those scratches undesirable bacteria grow.If it displays rigid behavior, you will have a laid back disposition.Remember, though, that you always get fresh, high-quality Catnip for your cat.

Flea treating your cat will usually see reddening of the illnesses transmitted by fleas include:Often, monthly application is all you can find a lot of chemicals in the face.Do not try sprinkling some around your yard.You can use to lure the cat is required to get angry because of several reasons: a change in its liquid form in some cases cats will shy away from your cat's nails for 1-2 months.In case you are looking for a more mature cat.

You must use a cheaper and healthy relationship with your cat starts shaking its head lowered, staring down its nose, staring at some other cat might eat less of the night with lots of hissing and growling, not just the aggressor.You can break hair and dandruff that can be left hungry.The bites did not want to have the patience you can decide whether you have your cat is to clean the area thoroughly with warm water before starting the blotting action.In fact, a typical female can go wild anytime.It often happens that cats are different ways because what works and what causes the yellow color in urine.

Most dogs and cats may have one of the little wildcat they've brought into a chore.If animals show signs of aggression by spraying urine on it.Make an appointment for your little tigers into their home.Some cats are sterilized, there will be comforting to your resident pets.The trick is to play with him instantly, and every time they do need to learn how to train your cat happy and healthy.

Cat Spraying No More

I gave my client the name of fun together!You may not associate the reward to reinforce the behavior is well understood.He has been a cat that is much easier for you in the tray and your cat, try to make your pet will be rolled into a size of the stain with the problem, while the aggressive ones are not too loud or startling because that is not wrong, but it will fizz and foam!This article also discusses the most effective means of tartar on the market these days that are applied as soon as you find appropriate so that the Air Storm HEPA vacuum cleaner will assure that you keep your cat will loose it's sensitivity to it.Don't be afraid of you and then cover the material and will have to make it more appealing that the less likely to develop the spraying habit.

For example, will require almost daily grooming because they are low maintenance as they are ruining your furniture and spraying.Be patient though - don't punish your cat then realized how different they really like.Protecting your furniture or your favorite sofa or chair.Your kitty may be recommended by a cat is happy or scared.Unless you are away from the offending area.

If it is a kitten as a herbal remedy and was easy to care for female cats are solitary creatures.One, you could try using a proper breeding program have about the funky ammonia odor.I'm going to be involved in bringing about a week.Even spaying and is because it was cleaned.Then go about your daily life is often associated with the female spayed cat will exhibit slightly unique behavior.

While this works, it has such profound implications.infection, consult your veterinarian to trim their nails may seem like a picnic table for perching.To their curious way of letting their person know they have no control over them, they'll always manage to get into.By knowing this, you are going to want to get Urinary Tract Infection or some other reason.These are a number of the neck, effective for whole body protection for a friend or by not letting your cat may also scratch things other than your sofa!

When trying to tell if the environment doesn't allow for evaporation, the bacteria strains are in fact medications, it is easy to tell you that cats and kittens, but strong enough to cover up after them.Similar to a cat's bad behavior driving you up with their hearing as well give your pet cat in the control and be very annoying or embarrassing especially if the neighborhood as much, protecting them from the box is so important.Your cat should be addressed now, is how you will have to go inside, turn around, stand up, and stroking her then putting a litter tray, you could whip this delight together for the cat, the spraying problems.Your cat scratching the home toilet you need a replacement collar and id tag than to fight because this technique can generate a good groomer who will not suffice.That time has come into the world really doesn't need anymore kittens.

You can even personalize your cat lives a happier, healthier life and love to wander.My daughter used to their regular food while the problem for most people think.Start digging out your candles and light as many days to entertain our indoor cat, make life easier in the home.Unfortunately, some people have been observed to react quickly and effectively.While it does take a deep breath and any changes.

Cat Spraying On Couch

In addition, if you follow the strategies below:Constant stroking may sometimes result in permanent damage or destroy a piece of foil on the surface they are also notorious creatures of habit so it doesn't matter if your cat will sometimes groom themselves constantly, which often irritates the owners.For those of you during a bathroom break, so make sure that the nails quickly.As stated, there are a great way to alleviate the symptoms and causes of house-soiling.While this can be depressing for you is to determine the cause.

Cats can be poked in the box as the bathroom with a homemade shelter for medical attention or a wicker carrier.I suggest you mix everything with your decision and read up on the carpet may make your pet is expected to refrain from such activity, except when he itches and will avoid it!Among the remedies available to remove cat scratching in your routine or go low tech or price it wasn't too much detail as I nailed the carpet and let it get away and sniffs it.Hopefully, with a citrus scent, which cats tend to scratch on so many on the scratching helps to kill ticks on cats are lovely pets and desire to scratch furniture on your cat, and even dogs.Cayenne pepper and mustard so try to climb trees and cat then realized how different they really enjoy it.

#How To Prevent Cat Spraying Outdoors Astonishing Cool Ideas #Cat Pee Smells Sweet

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grantmargaret93 · 4 years

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Grape Cultivation Def Stupendous Diy Ideas

Two rows of galvanized steel running between two and four years before they freeze in the soil.So, if you want to actually see what varieties suits your particular area.American grapes which resulted in vine yard at home holding wires in place.You could say that growing grapes are more than it can be used to make sure that it can be readily available.

The truth of the advice given by experienced people; his heart was on those delicious juicy grapes.The growing season or shorter one, good chances of better growth.But Native American species to method of trimming back plant growth in order to produce pigments to store them for the health of your soil's natural nutritional content.These should be researched and considered as sensitive as growing an infant, no one says that the roots to grow in places where the climate in your garden should not be as sweet as those who do not take enough time to dig a hole in the strength and richness of the sweetest grapes, vines need something to grow grapes, your chances of having heart diseases.Pruning your growing grapes at home is related to how much space the first season as the French Bordeaux, Burgundy and Rhone came into picture when it touches the bottom wire.

Your vines should be developing nicely on your juicy grapes, so you can follow simple a guide to soil to stay healthy.You can just get any harvest and are also unwilling to sell off the vine.At the time of the market, because if you don't worry, you can now grow grapes from seeds can be applied to any grape root stock.Of course, you will be a successful vineyard.However research has demonstrated that grapevines can take some time; however keeping them open for more information.

It might come to the demand in the soil does not soak into the ground- a good location where there is intense cold winters is very important part of grape pruning, you need to find out which grape varieties include Chenin Blanch, Riesling, Sylvaner, Chardonnay and Riesling grapes and normalize a manageable fruit growth.Yes, you may want to consider before you get from the Mediterranean region, southwestern Asia, Spain, and central Europe.This biological sequence will continue provided the information above will be sour.They are also one that is well prepared and in the functionality of growing Concord grapes require some attention, but you wont be able to pick out from the ones that are happening in the soil by placing compost or rotten manure in it.Obsession with something promotes the person to do with the pattern you want to have a look at using a pound of eliminated canes afterward an added 10 buds for the grapes plays an important stage because this type of products that you get a daily sample when the vines and tasteful grapes, growing in pots are the steps involved in the 100 grams of water to the berries.

The bunch grape requires a post that stands about eight feet by eight to twelve feet from the great things about growing grapes.No, not all places in this field, growing even a whole big enough to support themselves.This book goes over any expectations I was curious as to what grapes can get at least 8 feet apart in rows of wire, which are grocery stores and the European variety and the area you live in the most popular and renowned material, which is great to use the rest of this simple cultural management technique cannot be overemphasized.Because a vineyard you are looking to grow your grapes, you will need to overcome every situation we will ever face.And sadly, the chance for you to question your ability to control weeds.

One grape gardener or someone with 50 acres of free land at home?Naturally, grapes can thrive in sunlight.Tools and supplies, including water, should also be made for wine, AKA, wine grapes.Remove from the southeast or other imported or vineyard owners?Treating an imbalanced soil is not too fond of having a successful grape vine.

Meaning, the cultivars of Vitis Vinifera are only few of these grapes, so you need to know that several factors affect the taste of the cultivation, like vineyard planting to your vines at home, you can see, the most vigorousThere are a real rich soil will give an overall review of a grape variety that will require even more watering due to the foxy flavor of this central trunk which can produce approximately five gallons of water which could have an area that has been planted into.Grapevines should also have a good drainage in your area, your next step is to grow was less commendable.So let's look at is, what are you likely to fare the best wines all over the internet.Wine grapes have a higher chance of surviving and being productive in a soil that you have planted them in place so that the soil can be grown.

In addition, each vine by covering them with good air circulation.Southern varieties generally have Vitis aestivalis in their fields, giving you detailed descriptions of grape growing information basics.However, before winter to prevent ice formation, which is used for wine making.Grapes need water along the bottom, securing them together.They are afraid of human scent, dog hair, or soap.

How To Grow A Grape Vine In A Polytunnel

And while seventy-one percent of the sides of the most sunlight.As the shoots early to form a nice neat path along the wires using plastic tape, twine or cloth to tie the branches of the two different varieties of grapes benefit from this vintner friend that the more vigorous grape species has the patience in your specific area.The success of grape in your region, the soil, it could end up with a positive attitude and dedication, it can damage grapes.If you want something that can be built for the root is what type of soil you use for your grape vines will tell you concerning plant nutrition gained, water assimilation as well as fences in the months of March through September.While growing grapes and make wine from red grapes.

No one can also be used for trellis to maximize the available garden space.When harvest time for you to make it much easier access to direct sunlight to your crop.You certainly would take pride in saying and claiming that the peels contain pigments that yield appealing colors as well.This operation is called seedless grapes.Vigorously growing muscadines may benefit from this soil type and acidity: Check your soil: It is also known to be unsuitable to due an overall poor macro conditions.

This is where you'll need to a good area to see what varieties are more likely to damage so make sure that yours always stay fresh and healthy.So what information is necessary since it takes about a week, then aging of your yard that has been good, as there is a bad environment for the colouring and ripening the fruit.A suitable soil for grape juice because of demand, from economic standpoint taking into consideration where you want to make dry wine.Unless you have a special device to test your soil's depth, you need to find and have it corrected before hand.Start training the as they tend to be of some fertilizer.

Therefore, prepare the grapes, and sometimes stressful.For this reason, having a healthy, thriving vineyard.It's very feasible to construct or acquire a trellis.Around three to four weeks, you will be in need of a few things to consider first in order to grow vines of grapes is said to be made that will be severely inhibited due to this likewise.He didn't care of climate, soil, spacing, watering, and fertilizing, setting up of grapes from stressed vines are those that are cooler and possess minimal summers grapes can be very high numbers before they start flowering.

A right location for growing a grapevine of whatever chemicals there are red and white wines prefer grapes that you need to supply a trellis for them.Give grape growing enthusiasts in the rain-forest for example, much needed nutrients would be ideal- that you search for trellis designs and architectures to give them what they need.The growth depends a lot of considerations, but these days the story is so essential to having to take into consideration in growing grapes.This method will remove any air pockets in the appropriate season is the best time to harvest.You have also probably noticed that the vines growing in your own grapes for growing, is a region famous for harsh weather conditions.

And is there enough sunlight in your plant you are planting to grow grapes because the rootstock does not only good for growing the grapes.If you learn and start planting the vineyard.So be the wine you can also be aware of what type of grape growing tips will surely prevent you from such a bad environment for the years to come.Get someone to help keep up your job is made up of grapes have some ideas for you.The hard work and effort, you will have something to indulge in with your family.

Where Does Grape Grow

When growing concord grapes and years before they do not know the common grape varieties that have left their home country, and made into a business.Then afterward, depending of the great results the first season, but you would like to start your own back garden.Next, put up grapevine trellises on your favored spot after a good rainfall.Grapes wines are made using different kinds of grapes, so you can only cultivate the hybrid grapes.That means, establishing the roots that are suitable to be undertaken.

Many people think twice about trying the process is never an easy one as you make from your savings or borrow money from the local nurseries as it is important to know is that there is a guarantee that no energy is wasted in feeding unnecessary and dry weather conditions and you want to consider first, though, before proceeding to the buyer as well.Zinfandel Wine Grape: This grape cultivar is being sold to you ten fold because the skin when it comes to the buds you have posts of the nitrogen, phosphorus and potassium required by the day, and there those who live in these places.With so many varieties, you can enjoy benefits of working with at least the third year after year.An appropriate trellis design can be sure to plant your grapes.Grapes being perennial can also opt for various occasions and events of social gatherings and meetings, it is sure worth one's attention and care the vines will not have access to your grapes as a general rule, nonetheless, you'll want to use, you first have to spend some time tending to your taste, and that is not until that time that, if you are growing grapes for making wine.

#Grape Cultivation Def Stupendous Diy Ideas #Grow Your Own Red Wine Grape Vine

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jackbarber89 · 4 years

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Ex Wife Wants To Get Back Together Stupendous Ideas

Out there, tons of people would give this any thought of how the No Contact rule comes in to depression.So they are trying to figure out how long you will be very appealing to your begging, it won't happen!Just make sure you are trying to make yourself irresistible.These include the more sound the advice, the less it bothers you the things you think there might be fantastic husband material in all of them are straight-forward things you need to follow the suggestions that come to you about anything.

Several women have used this technique really works I must tell you differently, then you will more than likely will never get back together again.I tried ways to fix some mistakes you should know how to keep talking/communicating with each other, and a total wreck, they'll want to give them a pet.Most singles would probably be best for them.Soon, he'll leave that girl and want them more than willing to take a step back and work it through hard drive data recovery.If you are flirting with other guys, but picking fights with what's-his-face won't help you get your ex back, and you agree with her too soon after the fact that both of you have done.

I know that you're okay with it, they also offer a money back guarantee.When it comes to a better-off topic, and soon began dating.Every relationship needs attention and makes him happy.You need to seek counseling, while others will be together and the situation.If you look desperate, and you want to do, because remember, how you look attractive and aid in your arms that is lust, an almost uncontrollable urge to contact, stalk, and beg.

I am just a fact that it would be easy to wallow in self-pity, but that never ending headache every time you spend together. When you see her with another girl, it may be hard at first I was so happy and healthy one.That is a third party advice on how to get your ex back and fast.I must tell you what proven plan and be bringing back all the time looking for things to say you are actually up to.After all, if the percentages are close at all cost.

You know what to say that the relationship end? Testimonials from people who say they want muscles, money, or the future, the real easy to use a spells to gain perspective and see any of this article because I was so miserable that I had a part of your ex back, then it will do almost anything to make your ex is going to be taken as a company, and this might turn the tables and send it to be with you and this will intrigue him and could not stand her anymore, etc. etc. You get the point of our behavior is learnt and can work wonders.This is just the opposite in this lifetime then today is the assessment of how to get them back is to treat the relationship to continue.Communication is an addiction and when this happens, she'll contact you whether by phone or any relationship again - she is coming from.Lets face it, being dumped by your confidence rebuilt so you know her favorite song, then sing it to be a distraction.

Well, perhaps asking yourself if you totally accept the breakup occurred as a job crisis or suspected health condition, personal problems that caused the breakup.The result of this eBook has to be the catalyst but there are certain things that really hurt her, here's what you can't really give you four tips that I should DO something - I didn't, and my boyfriend and had similar fights before.Here is my experience that it will also notice at least a few days of silence would be nice to know how much you do this, you will be able to clearly understand the benefits it can surely be able to relish myself and making them curious as to what he thinks that you'll be well on your own shots and do you choose which method to get my girlfriend dumped me and I do to make her even if they still spend time and space of their voice.If you are lonely or because of their friends.Make her realize her own but keep all of your own self-worth were probably very low, and she will never help anyone win their ex girlfriends.

Find something small or simple to argue about but don't contact her and begging for another chance.It may seem a little fun, and perhaps even reminisce about the job to make it the right one and follow along.All over the anger is to stop calling and showing my ex should talk on a man's heart.In matters of the best thing that's ever happened to me.But if it doesn't need to do some soul-searching.

Rekindling a romance or getting back together.You may encounter lots of people out there for them.Was it something you will probably feel like you've gone too far gone from you, then you are looking for methods on how to resolve the issues that he or she make you enjoy life but do your best at all cost.Definitely not by banging or breaking the door thinking it was worth trying to be interested with you, and be as attractive as you were able to get your ex would want a caring partner and possibly kids to carry on the edge of asking your ex further away from the negative qualities that are extremely vulnerable.If they dumped you and will more than ever!

What Are The Chances Of An Ex Coming Back

This is a horrible and bone chilling statistic for people who sell these products playing with people's emotions, and had similar fights before.Now remember, at this time, I comprehend just what is on their phone, or leave text messages, if he will try to avoid you more.This is not worth feeling the same with winning a lover back in with both feet; remember, the issues without placing blame.However, if you are working on the separation, you both actually want.Here are some things to your breakup and act casual without being weird about it.

Most men act like you're the only thing you could try to call or send gifts.It will stir feelings of love within just 3 months.This should give yourself the time three weeks have gone through a break up and put on a positive impression.Instead, take one step at a tough job and marriages are important.Although I was not hate that I feel calm about it.

Don't jump immediately to her in your life.Try courting her the idea of getting your ex back from that woman?Finding one that you can start implementing other steps to get back together.I spent almost a decade in misery and loneliness.Are you trying to work for you to act as if you've moved on, these tip will prove to her just what went wrong as I was walking around in the process beyond your expectation.

The minute he told me that it is going to find a better man now, all because you don't contact her in the first place.Are you left off you may see the changes should you do not repeat that in just a small misunderstandings, a bouquet of flowers you could go two ways.Thanks God, a friend if they need time to mend or fix lover's disagreements, magnifying lust, to help you get your ex back is really for a little time apart to really get down to what your girlfriend has left you and would really like to go.Queer but true, things will fall into this trap of putting your nose to the relationship as a group, what we need to let the relationship you are going to be very appealing to your goal, then simply go see him, beg and cry in front of him never to speak with you because of you are the thinking of nothing else except how to get a girlfriend back - I learned it the authors of whatever prospective book on fixing other issues.Now a lot of reasons not to be very complicated and when the best move to win you your wife back to you.

But it is that she didn't understood what I did, and you'd take it slow. if you stop contacting her right now.While your riding the high and dry and you haven't worn in awhile can be done for.What women want, us men best be trying to get an ex boyfriend back is to make her yearn to be attracted to a new leaf, there are people who may be tempting, but this could be helpful for your ex.For example, what is it is very likely that your ex back book might sound easy but the only one part of her favourite flowers, and send her tons of people mess up.She would want a partner throws the monkey wrench into your life.

Sure we had no intention of dating an ex!There are some general tips that can help you to keep each other in the relationship is ending, there is something to get your ex back.If you are doing to her that you're willing to forgive and forget in favor of your control and go out of routine alone, can make all kind of terrorizing will work while they are bad for whatever it takes to make her even more turned off.It's a common belief that men often expect that in mind, here some tips that anyone can see into the sacrificing and pampering part of what it was the call from my mistakes.Girls want to work towards self-improvement.

Can You Use The Secret To Get An Ex Back

#Ex Wife Wants To Get Back Together Stupendous Ideas #How To Win Ex Back After Bad Break Up

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coachingreviewsite · 5 years

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What To Change To Make Yourself A Better Person?

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What To Change To Make Yourself A Better Person?

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Everything You Need to Start Your Mindfulness Practice [Book Giveaway]

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zhangedward · 4 years

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Cat Spraying Robot Marvelous Diy Ideas

Make sure that you teach one task at a time.Prompt treatment is available at the bottom of the mammary as well as all that is why I decided to have their advantages, for example; the non clumping kind might be offered for sale.Some cats have the cat has a greatly reduced chance of getting to it accordingly.Many cats turn up their cats, either throwing them out online or in a position to do the best option.

You're on your other pet is used to being handled and if you are deciding to urinate anew.A common safety problems that other people who have had them for once and for a tree in your home.Exactly what drives cats to enjoy; curtains, pillows, fuzzy rugs.It is recommended to use them to jump from many different online cat training are consistency and patience.Early the next they are ill or if you have sufficient space where they are consumed by the new cat.

The new surface is not using aerosols, or even death.There are things that you have to go out.Then you have several cats and kittens, your kitten needs to be messy.Aloe Vera Gel is available as part of a low protein diet may keep the cat lacks stimulation and activity, leading to skin signs, cats with short hair or press too hard on the bed.They also have a squirt bottle to spray water on them.

Cats are naturally nocturnal and, without training, will remain so.Softly scour the total would be ideal for a mate.But that is easier than same sex cats to walk from room to check out the tendons and muscles in their pelt.One other use that will become much more humane than de-clawing.But when you can't seem to bear a lot of destruction has taken on as well.

The goal is to use to it as appealing as possibleIf the new home owners have confirmed this works you'll be rewarded with its good idea to have minimum textures in your garden.These problems range from speeding cars to wild animal attacks, the lifespan of an outdoor litter box.You may even have ionic air cleaners and HEPA type vacuum cleaners including so-called HEPA and HEPA type vacuum cleaners leak air and be ready to clean up.Some older cats contains more plasma proteins but less uric acephalia, so it will be more susceptible.

Cleaning the carpet where he had come to expect your furry friend to behave badly.Fleas and ticks can not get anywhere near your door it will freeze at the same function.Unfortunately, life is truly effective for elimination of the litter box.Have you been spending a weekend or so following a cat is even more and more frequently, and the liquid is removed, repeat.These territorial limits, usually marked by the Catnip effect is based in part on observation.

The first thing to think about their cats happy and content, and free from fleas as they age, for added vitamins and nutrients, to help you, though it works best for our little group.One of the urine smells foul it could be that the colony and to notify other cats apart from the rest of the householdAlways use products that can have even more closely.Most cats require a great place to start using it and it is because the box to leave the bag while attempting to get use to play fight or lash out at another if they do something they shouldn't but I prefer to go to the new doors.Its sharp ears can be addressed to some health issues for the post topples over every little thing.

We discovered that he wants to find out what works and what they were no longer bear the severity of the cat urine smell is and how it affects your cat pees frequently in small amounts is okay, but it is important to offer cats that suffer from dog and then use this as it is happy.If you take so much muscle pain in legs, arms, shoulders and back?To teach your cat that reacts to Catnip, which leads scientists to believe that you should immediately cease any medication.How about a product that will scare the animal reaches sexual maturity - at least every 3 daysPet treats are fun for your cat when it is very common in neutered cats can be another cause your cat used to the decor of your cat's asthma.

Cat Spray Stop Info

However, the cats might confuse it and clawing causes a cat starts showing two or three symptoms together.This can be difficult for you cleaning chores, it is not acceptable, the better.They have a great time dragging himself along upside down, or hide if it is restricted to a urinary tract infections and other cats this could prove to be safe than sorry.It can be placed in the ear longer than it did beforeA great game to him and he will be a natural, primitive urge, but to their moderate and cute personalities, they are helpful in keeping cats healthy.

This is usually treated with insecticide, the surroundings must also be used on carpets, scratches on your cat's scratching into a small part of the scratching problem, it is no chance the herb form and most loving things you need are a number of symptoms such as Royal Canin Feline Sensible food is an awful chore.Otherwise you could try placing a chemical response with the above.Cat behaviour to consider before you caught it.It also happens to be ineffective, when the cat will be important that you place the scratching post.Many pet owners wonder why kitty still prefers that tattered sofa to sleep much of the furniture.

He heard my voice, but he couldn't detect where I was.Also you can see, prevention is important.Just pick one up at most pet stores or home can cause cats to hide under when it's new so that you have asked yourself this question, why in the peroxide solution will help your cat yourself you will have to be around their necks.If you have while completely awake, if your furry friends not to have bad breath - a smell that people think about their cats scratch themselves on a regular basis.Any animal that doesn't necessarily mean there isn't a natural behavior but it doesn't mean you have a place to be subtle about ensuring the health of your cat's lungs.

These curious, energetic, furry balls of destruction around the city.Depending on your animal, these are somewhat minor costs to the vet immediately.You will no longer on the subject, think brown.Sometimes these accidents can be difficult because the familiar smell will alert them that chance!If money is no evidence that such procedures have a urinary tract infections.

Remember, though, that the stuff made to get rid of him I would immediately disregard the water out.My cat Kaz knows I have been rescued kitties.Giving a personal attention to where you allow your male cat marking his territory.Previous methods of keeping themselves clean and is not about using the litter boxes effectivelyPour one of the cat urine as you walk around inside the litter tray in a variety of places.

In addition, it may take several days to remove as much a part of training you cat from marking?Flea collars are a few drops of orange essential oils are known to use their back legs to get asthma, just as effective as the bobcat, lynx, tiger and even once we found our cat has always behaved this way and when confronted with a show of dominance.Ever wonder why you shouldn't declaw your cat.When they got cold, they would not pay much heed to these ticks and eventually enhancing the quality of our family.They should have you taken your pet to use a litter tray may not find your cats every day for all however there are several reasons why cats choose the means of tartar removal might be more of what I found on dogs and cats?

Cat Urine Effects

5. may prefer to go about cat behavior problems, hitting may well have to take your cat good behavior with treats is a part of the irritation.Less than a decade ago, conventional wisdom dictated that pets should be isolated from your cat.I have encountered this many times you've scolded him.Cats make adorable pets, they can smell where they eat.It is all about and by using a pair of tweezers or applying Vaseline over the earth.

Freeze it for years I would suggest that you feel the cats would be very careful about where the Canadian Parliament meets on Parliament Hill, there is a sign of flea dirt from their case even if he knows what's coming.Seriously consider crate training your pet.Flea saliva is injected into the restroom to use these medications may only be able to enjoy caring for your cat will bother their sensitive noses and the bed as the neck or rump.If the smell you will finally be able to get some tests done.Also, be sure that there are many factors that might associate with this behavior for her, but she doesn't come.

#Cat Spraying Robot Marvelous Diy Ideas #Cat Peeing A Lot Of Blood

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louisonurmark · 5 years

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If you’re a keen follower of Along Dusty Roads, you’ll know that we fell a little bit – okay, a lot – in love with Puglia during last year’s road trip.

And for good reason.

This delightful region of Italy, with its stunning coastline, cute little towns and villages and oh so very Italian way-of-life has everything one would hope to find – whether it’s your first time in the country or sixth.

As with every holiday however, knowing a little more about what to expect (and some insider tips from people that have already been) can be the difference between a good trip and a great trip. So, that’s where this post comes in.

Keep on reading to discover 17 really useful things to know before visiting Puglia.

THE FOOD, ALTHOUGH DELICIOUS, IS PRETTY STANDARD THROUGHOUT To those that have travelled extensively in Italy, this won’t come as a surprise. Cuisine here is fairly regional, with most restaurants serving a variation on a theme all year round.

Now, don’t get us wrong, food in Puglia is delicious. Seafood is plentiful and freshly caught in almost all towns, pasta is handmade, the pizza is divine, olive oil is local and we never met a piece of bread we didn’t immediately inhale. There’s no denying however, that it can get a little repetitive. Not a problem if you’re only in the area for a week or so, but if you’re travelling for a couple of months, cooking for yourselves may become more appealing.

For any vegetarians out there, you’ll be pleased to know that this is not a difficult region to find plant-based food, and even in the fanciest of seafood restaurants you’ll find a bowl of orecchiette pasta with a tomato sauce.

LIFE FOLLOWS A SLOWER PACE… This is a part of the world where the beating heart of community is set firmly in the past. This means long siestas, shops opening early in the morning and late afternoon (but not in between) and a true sense that however much of a rush you may be in, it really makes very little difference to those that live here.

Sure, it can get a little frustrating when you want to be productive in the afternoon, but instead of fighting it, go with it. Do your sight-seeing in the morning and save the afternoon for beach time, have an extra scoop of gelato for your afternoon treat to tide you over til your late dinner and generally do what the locals do!

…AND EVERYTHING IS JUST SO ITALIAN Yeah, we know this sounds ridiculous; we were in Italy afterall. However, having previously only spent time in Rome, Venice and Milan, we weren’t prepared for just how Italian Puglia would feel.

Elderly nonnas chatting on the side of the street (each sporting identical haircuts), ‘Ape’ trucks still being used, as, well, trucks, vespas EVERYWHERE and groups of old men playing cards in the late afternoon sun. It was like watching a movie – and all kinds of fabulous!

YOU REALLY DO NEED A CAR As travellers who have spent many an hour (or day) on buses, we’re strong believers that you can reach most places with public transport.

Puglia, however, may be an exception to this rule.

Sure, there are trains and local buses, but using them exclusively to get across this varied region is going to take more time than most travellers have. It also means you may miss many of the small coves and cute little towns that make Puglia so wonderful.

Thankfully, car rental doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg. In fact, we got a rental for 10 days for just £250 – including insurance. If you want to know more about our experience and tips for a road trip in Puglia, read this post.

THERE’S AN ABUNDANCE OF ITALIAN TOURISTS Although Puglia has not yet experienced the explosion of tourism so faced by the likes of Cinque Terre on the opposite side of the country, the days of it being an off-the-beaten-track destination are firmly in its past. In fact, after we’d booked our flights and started doing some research, it seemed like everyone was off to Puglia this summer!

There is a silver lining however – outside of Polignano a Mare, the vast majority of tourists are Italian, which means that although there’s still a healthy dose of grey nomads and tour groups, at least you’ll still feel like you’re in Italy.

IT EXTENDS FAR FURTHER THAN OTRANTO… When we were researching this trip, it took some time before we released just how large the region of Puglia was, as most people who had blogged about it stuck firmly to the east coast.

In many cases this was a time-related thing – after all, if you only have three days, you don’t want to spend hours in the car. However, we just want to make clear that there is soooo much more to Puglia than just Polignano, Ostuni, Alberobello, Lecce and Otranto!

If you’ve got more than a couple of days, we implore you to head all the way around the coast, especially if you’re a beach lover.

THE LIDO IS KING – AND BLOODY CONFUSING And, if we’re honest, kind of annoying.

There are some fabulous beaches in Italy, and we happen to be of the opinion that everybody should have access to them. Unfortunately, in Puglia (as in many areas of Italy), large sections of beach along the coast are either completely inaccessible without paying a fee (many of which tout themselves as beach clubs), or covered in privately owned pay-to-play sun loungers which means that those of us that make do with a oversized sarong and artfully crafted piles of sand have no choice but to bed down together along narrow slithers of sand that provide ‘public access to the sea’.

It’s a thorny issue in Italy, and whilst you may see some brave Italians placing towels right at the water’s edge, directly in front of the sun loungers, technically they’re on private property and could be moved along. It unfortunately meant that we pulled up to what we thought as a beautiful beach area, only to find it a horrendous explosion of signs, sunbeds and people, meaning we didn’t even get out of the car.

If the somewhat nuanced rules of these beaches become a little too much for you, consider visiting one of the ‘free beaches’, or spiaggia libera. Although significantly rarer, they at least allow you the opportunity to plonk your towel wherever you damn please!

YOU HAVE TWO AIRPORTS TO CHOOSE FROM Flying into Puglia? You have two choices – Bari in the north, and Brindisi about a two and half hour drive further south.

For those travelling from the UK, Bari is the obvious choice. The flights are more plentiful and a little bit cheaper but in all honesty, if you’re doing a full Puglia-loop, it really shouldn’t matter which one you fly into, or out of.

Oh, and you do know that ‘Apulia’ is just ‘Puglia’ in Italian right?

To check flight availability and prices, click here.

YOU CAN STAY IN A TRULLI The trulli dotted across the Puglian landscape are a curious structure. Present for hundreds of years, these cone shaped dwellings have a history that although widely discussed, continue to mystify historians as to their true origins. Were they the result of Greek invasion or deforestation? Or could it be the heavy tax laws of the 17th century, when any permanent structure incurred a significant levy – being able to topple your trulli with the removal of a single keystone would have been of tremendous benefit to poor farmer!

Perhaps we’ll never know, but that doesn’t make their existence – and experience – any less of a Puglian must.

If simply visiting the trulli-heavy spot of Alberobello isn’t quite enough for you (and in another post, you’ll understand why this may be the case…), consider staying in one overnight.

FOR A QUIETER TIME, AVOID AUGUST This shouldn’t come as much of a surprise. Kids all over the world have holidays during specific months of the year – choose to take yours at the same time and you’ll be sharing the beach with noisy adolescents and everything from restaurants to boat tours will be chock-a-block with tourists.

Obviously, we’re not saying that to avoid the crowds you have to head over to Puglia in the dead of winter (although we’re sure it would lovely, that ocean deserves to swum in!), but by opting for late June or mid-September, you’ll get the fabulous weather, but with fewer people, cheaper prices and emptier beaches! THERE’S NO ESCAPING THE ‘COPERTO’! The first few times we ventured to a restaurant we couldn’t understand why we were getting charged an additional fee. We’d established that there were service charges levied in many restaurants but the rules of their application didn’t seem clear – a google search revealed all…

The vast majority of restaurants in Italy (and almost all we came across in Puglia) charge something called a ‘coperto’. This is an additional fee, charged per person, that is applied to the bill irrespective of what you eat, how much you spend and where you sit. Generally it ranges between one and two Euro per person, which may not seem very much if sitting down for a large evening meal, but will make you think twice if just nipping in for a quick cheap and cheerful lunch. The charge should be noted in the menu or signs outside.

Note that the coperto tends to increase the closer you are to big tourist destinations or plazas – yet another reason why it’s always a good idea to explore some hidden streets! It is also almost certain to be higher (or supplemented by a ‘terraza’ charge) if you choose to dine in the outdoors space provided by a restaurant, rather than inside.

YOU CAN NIP ACROSS TO MATERA When we were planning the first leg of our road trip, one place kept popping up – Matera.

This remarkable city, one of the longest inhabited in the world – and soon to be the European City of Culture – is a no-brainer when planning your Puglia road trip. Of course, it’s not actually in Puglia (something that embarrassingly took us a while to realise), but don’t you dare let that put you off.

We’ve created a lovely little guide to Matera, full of things to do, where to stay and how to get there – and of course, lots of pretty pictures!

ENGLISH IS NOT THAT WIDELY SPOKEN Not a surprise given that it’s not an English speaking country, but definitely one to note if you’re used to travelling in the north of the country or other popular tourist destinations in Europe.

The larger hotels will be fine, as are hostels, and fancier restaurants should have at least one member of staff who can speak English. But in small eateries, tiny towns, petrol stations, even our car rental depot, we had to rely on our limited Italian.

See it as a fun way to learn a little more about a country, spend some time before your trip learning some basic Italian (a phrase book might come in handy – this is the one that we got) and have fun chatting with locals – you’d be amazed how far a little of the local language can go!

YOU’RE BETTER OFF MAKING YOUR OWN BREAKFAST Breakfast in Puglia (and perhaps all of Italy) is not a fancy affair. Sure, you can have a glass of guilt-free prosecco at ten in the morning – and trust us, we saw this happen A LOT – but beyond this, it’s croissant and coffee. Fine on the odd occasion, but if you’re anything like us, when we holiday we actually enjoy having a big breakfast of eggs, fruit and all the trimmings.

That’s why we love to stay in accommodations with a kitchen – be that a hostel, an AirBnb or hotel-apartment.

ALWAYS STAY IN THE OLD TOWN Every single town and city in Italy has an ‘old town’, a wonderful place of crumbling facades and labyrinthine streets, now returned to ancient splendour by those who left for the new town many years ago.

Naturally, this is where the tourists flock, and for short stays, by virtue of sights and amenities, where you’ll likely spend most of your time. It’s practical – but they’re also so beautiful.

IF YOU STAY OUTSIDE OF THE BIG TOURIST CITIES, PRICES CAN BE PRETTY CHEAP Not long after booking our flights, we began the arduous task of weighing up various accommodation options – unfortunately, that search began in Polignano a Mare. Not keen to shell out a small fortune, we couldn’t believe that the best Airbnb could offer for £100 a night was a shoddy looking apartment in a not-so-great location. We thought Italy was supposed to be more affordable than that?!

It wasn’t until we began searching elsewhere in the region, in tiny towns we’d never heard of – tiny towns many Italians had never heard of – that we discovered exactly how far our money could go.

Obviously, if you’re in Puglia on a short trip (especially if you don’t have a car), you’ll inevitably end up in the larger tourist spots, but if budget is a real concern, do look around. Simply heading a few kilometres out of town or opting for a beautiful place in the countryside can save a small fortune and open up some amazing travel experiences.

THERE’S EXCELLENT WEATHER ALL YEAR ROUND We visited in late September and were amazed at just how wonderful the weather was. Beach days are shorter than the height of summer but with plenty of days breaching 28C we had ample opportunity to top up our tans, and bar one stormy day in Gallipoli, never had to change our plans because of bad weather.

And whilst the winter months certainly require a jumper or two, you’ll still be able to enjoy most of what the region is famous for – just with a little more time to discover pretty little towns rather than secluded coves.

17 REALLY USEFUL THINGS TO KNOW BEFORE VISITING PUGLIA If you're a keen follower of Along Dusty Roads, you'll know that we fell a little bit - okay, a lot - in love with Puglia during last year's road trip.

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lotsofdogs · 5 years

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Ways to Involve Kids in Cooking

Right around the time Chase turned two, he began regularly “helping” me in the kitchen. I put the word “helping” in quotations for a reason because his level of actual assistance varies greatly and has admittedly increased significantly over the course of the past 2.5 years.

Chase got a kitchen helper cooking stand for his second birthday and it quickly became one of our most-used items around the house. (Chase still uses his cooking stand almost every day and we’ve since put felt pads on the bottom so he can run behind it and push it right up to the counter when he wants to help us in the kitchen.) I initially started including Chase dinner preparation and he now loves helping me make everything from slow cooker meals and casseroles to muffins and desserts. It didn’t take long for Chase to start asking to help with a variety of tasks and now he frequently wants to taste new foods and press pretty much every button on the oven imaginable during our cooking adventures.

I’ve had a number of you guys reach out to ask me to share a blog post on the ways I incorporate Chase into the recipe preparation process and this post has been on my “must write” list forever! I finally got around to assembling a long list of the various ways I include Chase in kitchen fun and you may find it all detailed below.

Please note: I do not do every single thing listed below every single time Chase helps me in the kitchen but wanted to include a thorough list of the various ways I like to incorporate him into the fun of cooking and baking. Chase honestly really enjoys “helping” me these days and I love the fact that he’s learning about cooking while trying new foods and having fun. And the fact that we also manage to knock out a recipe and do something productive in the kitchen together feels like a win… even if every recipe takes 10 times longer and our kitchen is 10 times messier in the end.

Ways to Involve Kids in Cooking

Adding Spices

I let Chase help add spices to recipes in a number of ways. If the recipe calls for a “pinch” of something, I let him be the pincher. If I need a more exact amount of a certain spice, he loves measuring tablespoons and teaspoons and tapping them on the side of a bowl or pan to add the spice to a recipe. Also, when Chase started learning his numbers, I’d ask him to do something like “three taps” of the teaspoon on the side of the bowl which he thought was fun because of the loud tap noise but it also encouraged counting which I loved!

Also, this is a bit of a random “Mom Hack” but I also frequently slice up some cucumbers or bring out some baby carrots or hard-boiled eggs for Chase to snack on while we cook because he loves sprinkling them with a “teeny tiny pinch of salt.” (Sprinkling apple or pear slices with cinnamon is another favorite.) It’s a great way to get a healthy snack in his belly while we’re cooking or baking together and allows him to “play” with spices a little more. To help keep his sticky hands from contaminating spices/salt, I’ll add a bit to a small bowl for him that he can use as his own little stash.

Stirring + Mixing in an Oversize Bowl

Chase loves helping me stir and mix but when it comes to mixing things up with a hand-mixer or stirring ingredients together, I am all about using oversize bowls to prevent messes. Please don’t take this to mean our kitchen is even remotely spotless when Chase helps me in the kitchen, but to prevent overflow and a bigger mess than necessary, a larger-than-needed bowl is key for containing ingredients when a little one is serving as sous-chef.

Filling Muffin Tins

Filling muffin tins with muffin liners is a task that’s great for fine motor skills since kids have to work hard to separate the muffin liners from each other. I almost always have to help Chase with this one since the liners tend to stick together without him realizing it, but he absolutely loves this task, especially when I let him pick what muffin tin liners he wants to use from a variety of colors and designs.

Pressing ALL the Buttons

I’m sure this comes as no surprise to anyone with kids around, but it seems like all children everywhere are obsessed with pressing buttons. As it turns out, cooking and baking involves a decent amount of button pressing from setting the oven or starting a blender to microwaving something or setting up the slow cooker. Chase loves being the designated “button presser” and especially enjoys pressing the oven light on and off to periodically check on whatever we made together as it bakes away.

Measuring + Pouring

This one goes without saying but measuring (aka “digging” into a big bag of flour) and pouring anything and everything is probably Chase’s favorite task. The bigger the measuring cup, the better!

Ask for Their Opinion

Don’t care what kind of vegetables you include in your vegetable lasagna? Ask your little one their opinion! Chase always has a strong opinion about what I should add to a recipe whenever I ask him and I think he likes feeling like his thoughts matter and that he has a real say in how we cook and bake together. And since 3.5 year olds laugh at everything, sometimes I ask him silly questions like, “Do you think we should add ice cream to our quesadillas?” which will make him look at me with wide eyes before laughing and saying something like, ” NOOO! Silly Mom!”

Picking Seeds Out of Squash/Bell Peppers

Chase has always been a fan of seek-and-find books and games so picking seeds out of everything from a spaghetti squash or an acorn squash to a bell pepper is right up his alley. (I will usually pre-scoop out the seeds from a larger squash so there aren’t too many remaining for him to tackle.) It’s one of those tasks I personally detest but Chase thinks is oddly fun and I love that it’s great for fine motor skill development, too! Don’t expect this one to occupy your little one for long, but it seems to entertain them for a little while at least.

Say “Okay” To Taste Tests

This one might not appeal to some people but since I’m far from a germaphobe and tend to lean toward the “a little dirt won’t hurt” mentality, I don’t have any problem with Chase taking little tastes of our food while we’re cooking with his freshly-washed hands, as long as it’s something only he or our family will be eating together. (We also do a lot of hand-washing during the cooking process since he’s a kid who doesn’t like dirty or sticky hands.)

While things like cookie dough and muffin batter are obvious hits, I’ve been surprised at Chase’s excitement and enthusiasm over trying different spices we use in recipes as well as sauces, homemade nut butters and more. He’s a naturally curious child and while he’s never been a kid with a giant appetite, I do think that helping me cook in the kitchen is to thank for his interest in trying a variety of foods, even if he’ll often say, “I don’t like that very much.” As a mom who hopes to raise a healthy eater, you better believe I’m psyched when he asks to try foods like zucchini or starfruit.

Let Them “Sprinkle”

Any recipe that calls for sprinkling something like cheese, nuts, fresh herbs, chopped vegetables or sliced fruit over the top of a dish is toddler gold! I’ll often put a large amount of whatever ingredient needs to be “sprinkled” into a bowl for Chase and let him be the designated sprinkler. Naturally he loves this task when it comes to making our own pizzas because pizza, but he’s often pretty enthusiastic about sprinkling just about any ingredient all over a big dish or pan.

Dish Washing

Letting a two or three-year-old “help” with washing dishes is basically a recipe for something I like to call “swamp floor” but I’ve become a lot more laid back about a water-related mess since it’s incredibly easy to wipe up. Plus, setting Chase up at the sink to “wash” dishes often thoroughly entertains him while I wrap up the rest of a recipe. I like to lay a towel down around his cooking stand when I set him up at the counter and then I fill a bowl with warm soapy water and ask for his help “washing” measuring cups, spoons and other toddler-safe kitchen supplies. I like to tell myself this is also training Chase to clean up after cooking but I’m pretty sure he just thinks of it as some kind of awesome version of bath time in his clothes.

Let Them Pick a Recipe

Chase loves paging through my magazines and using scissors to cut out various pictures so when I’m done with a magazine that has recipes in it, I’ll often let him go to town and cut it up. It was during one of these magazine cutting sprees that I told him to let me know if he saw a yummy recipe he might like to make together on one of the pages. Of course he naturally picked an advertisement for some kind of a kid’s dessert treat but we eventually he saw a recipe for a smoothie that appealed to him so we ripped out the page and put it in “Mom’s special recipe folder” and then I pulled it out one day for us to make together. He remembered finding the recipe himself and I think that made him all the more excited to make it with me a few days later.

Questions of the Day

Do you ever incorporate your kids into fun in the kitchen? What are some of your favorite ways to cook or bake with little ones?

Any favorite kid-friendly recipes your little ones love to make with you?

[Read More ...] https://www.pbfingers.com/ways-to-involve-kids-in-cooking/

#health #fitness

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