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kendrixtermina · 4 years

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Now here's an all new theory for where the procrastination comes from

Like the uni councilors thought of like generic selfhate insecurity or like spineless ppl pleasing (nope an anime cured me of that when I was 13 - thst sounded more like what that ladys own problems might be), fear or failure & wanting to spite my father, eveb that getting ahead through "talent" was an unfair advantage bad tainted and evil, or that "talent" meant being beholden and controlled by others (definitely somewhat right - we worked on that, it helped, the second guy was defs much much more helpful & compatible cause he focussed a lot more on strategies than wannabe-maternal pep talks) but there was always something else there that wasnt getting touched

In tje end I dont think I have talent and in any case what really matters is attitude toward "living the examined life" for example whst you do. What you notice.

Now I did notice that things get harder to do precisely because I actually want them(whereas a lot of ppl get distracted from stuff because they dont really want it) - at the same time I can totally function or pick up new habits in day to day life its not like I have some "hardware problem" like, say, ADHD or the like.

Like of course its some emotional knot it couldnt be anything else but I feel they didnt identify what kind of knot? Certainly not that first lady. If im trying to get clarity and you give me reassuring pep talks you just freak me out more for the love of god tell me whats happening. Nothing worse when a Doctor says "it will be over soon" rather than explain the procedure

Fear of/ distraction from wanting itself never really occured to me thats not a common stereotypical fear that ppl talk about.

Let me get this straight I never thought I was better than anyone I knew very well that I'm not. I thought of both those things as ways not to get bullied, maybe get somewhere where I feel that im in the right place.

If I look back at really breaking experiences it was times I really really wanted something and then I couldnt do it or some outside party stepped on my fingers. That Tori Amos Music Video where she escapes from a psycho killer's trunk and then the passerby's dont help her? That was my most favorite music video in the world for years maybe still is.

Like I was told I could maybe skip third grade and I poured all my energy and passion and strenght into that everything I had to do well, make friends with the new class i was so highly motivated I aced all the exams I felt so happy & fulfilled just being in thst flow state all the time... i wanted this more than anything. Maybe it was the first time I really wanted something beyond vague dreams or base desires. But the homeroom teacher hated my guts and put the kibosh on that; Probably because I was unwittingly repeating some of the artogant classist shit my father spouts without realizing how hurtful it is. my parents thought it wasnt worth going to the higher ups for that but having to essentially redo 4th grade in a crap school in the different town we moved to was one of the worst times of my life. Also I didnt find out that the teacher had hated me/acted in a petty way until years after I thought I just failed. That there was a possible place I could have belonged but turns out I really belong nowhere after all.

All my effort was for nothing. It was such a joy - i mean these days even getting code to work or solving math problems has that same joy - but all that effort and joy and wanting did was that... im tearing up and searching for the words to even process this tbh. I think I denied that joy, told myself that I was just a stupud kid thinking I was a special snowflake. It didnt even matter.

Rather than insist on staying up late to make sure my homework was done I just stopped caring and hardly did another piece of homework in my life just faking it on the spot or coasting through. It could have gone another way maybe if it werent for the bullies and my father the chief bully or if only I was more determined but it was like "okay I dont care anymore I just dont care" and I think thats stayed my default response to dissapointment to this day.

This TV show didnt turn out like I wanted? I dont care its just a tv show.

My father treated be with hatred all my life? Its okay I dont care about him and I dont want his love anyway.

Like there were other times when I thought I could be happy.

Like I really wanted to go to this boarding school for gifted kids. Again I thought maybe incorrectly that this would be a place where I can belong and not be bullied it was never about being better than anyone.

Again I wanted it I clamored and cried and made noise nonstop. Maybe I still hadnt wholly lost contact with willpower back then. I still thought of myself as strong willed.

And my father made me regret it. It was around the same time that mom briefly considered divorce maybe I was just the stress valve. Or he took it personally as wanting to get away from him. Duh he abused me of course I wanted away from him. He was such a suffocating control freak! Mom said yes first then he spoke to her and suddenly she followed everything he said. Thats when I really realized how emotionally manipulative was how abusive... i mean one of my first conscious memories of him is thinking "oh crap I will be just like cinderella" but he really laid it on so thick so transparently even a 10 year old could tell its manipulation. If you do this you dont love your mom. If you do this you dont love your siblings. If you dont obey me your mom will kill herself. No she wont you jerk even my 2 year old self could tell youre abusive.

The most cruel thing he did was briefly say yes. Again I got so happy. So invested. Just bending all I was towards that even though he bombarded me with abuse and mental torture.

And then on the day we were supposed to leave he said no youre not going.

Maybe I actually did say I didnt want to go because of one time he was doing this constant scientology type torture on me

That same reaction: "I dont want it I dont want anything so please please let me be"

Ppl think of bad childhoods as a game that you win if yoz turn 18 -or 28 maybe - without killing yourself. But its not. Every year you live it can take away from your potential. Every day less than you have to live it

He sure didnt let me have sucess with his overcontrol and abuse. Anything I was proud of he rules. When I graduated from school with a fairly good but not perfevt final score he humiliated me. When I turned 18 he humiliated me. Everything I did was a burden even just feeding and washing me. Hed give me unwanted white elephant gifts then bitch about how giving them to me ruined his life cause he had to work so muxh "Ingrate Ingrate Ingrate" Butch I never asked for anything I want nothing!

But as I had to eat I did in fact have to ask things of him and I hated it so much.

No wonder that I turned out afraid of wanting things eh?

Hed seen some poster when we went to see tje school I wanted to go to - not by the school by an individual student - about the history of abortion portrayed in a positive way or at least that was his official reason why I couldnt go. Again I had wanted something badly with all my being and again all my being availed nothing. Irrelevant like I didnt exist. All my screaming gone unheard.

And this is so silly cause im not a child anymore I have control and if I were to stop procrastinating I could have money and gave even more control.

I havent even spoken to him in years now hes no longer relevant. Its not about him its about thus bad pattern I picked up.

I like how this books handles it with the idea that certain experiences dont create the type but that it nakes you uniquely suceotible to certain kinds of hurt or certain misunderstandings.

Because with all this discourse about bad message free media ive really come to think that while it can and should be minimized its not possible to eradicate cause human mibds are so quicl so fallible to extract overgeneralizations and make it mean something abput themselves

Like an immature statistical learning model easily overtrained by noisy data.

Another time I was nearly happy was when I started looking for work, doing my thesis...

Same pattern I was engaged, happy to be engaged talking to ppl at both work and in the uni work group loving it all so much...

my life had started to feel meaningful again. And it had gotten to that point in part because of my ex-fiance. Yes the councelling heloed taking up meditation helped, getting high on morning glory that one time helped a whole lot got more self esteem from that than I ever got from my father.

But that all started because of my ex fiance.

He was an i tellectual type and he had a sense of purpose about him like hes a legendary character and everyone around him became legendary too. And he found me useful! Others had called me "walking dictionary" with mockery and scorn he called me his google and it meant love and admiration. Maybe I got a bit of an ego trip off of tjat but I also really stupidly dumbtastically loved him I bragged of him to anyobe who listened everything he did seemed fascinating abd interesting and meaningful, but also I just loved the sweet gentle warmth of being next to him in the morning. Once again I was happy and everything was joyful even when it was hard, I felt strong and meaningful and useful and I let myself openly want things.

And then it all blew up. Worse yet i was so mistaken abozt him it really shook my confidence in my own judgement or any sense of clarity. I was si confused during the fucking breakup like I hadnt been since I left my father's house.

Google hah! More like his personal Alexa! It turns out he didnt respect or like me at all.

I couldnt even be sad or angry cause it was all my mistake. The one feeling I allowed - and even that took me weeks to identify - is dissapointment. Heavy leaden dissapointment i didnt even kniw that was a feeling you could feel so strongly. I didnt even do anything wrong you have to open yourself to have love. He could habe choosen to love me he just simply didnt. He probably thought he did but he wouldnt evebn do something as simple as not make fun of my voice or clean when I am sick.

Once he started putting me in the "wife" role he just became unable to see me. His loss really cause I think he wanted to keep me from all those annoying texts and email he had the nerve to write.

By all means I was right to trust but also right to leave later but still my sense of certainty and purpose and meaning was totally shaken. He did the sort of romantic stuff I didnt think was real. I knew I loved him when we had this conversation about water on mars. He got me the perfect books for my birthday! He said I was pretty and a genius and looked just like an actress. He got me this titanic esque heart pendant with stars. We were stuck at midnight in a train station that one time and he pulled out a picnic rug two plastic glasses and a shampain bottle. It never worked out but he said he might take me to see the LHC! I really thought we would be buried in the same hole folks!. He had read that same steven Hawkings book that I loved. One of the rather few books he actually read as I would find. Sigh.

And I fell right back into that same old pattern. Dont care about anything dont want anything it would be stuoid unrealistic and silly to want.

When I first came to uni I also had this feeling of hapiness and belongingness and wanting, I was putting in an effort, talking to ppl more.. and when things went wrong the slightest bit I pulled by hand back from that like from an open flame.

And here I am years later most the sucess or contact I get is comments on my fanfictions.

I thought I was doing that, or drawing, because its Stakes/Evaluation-free (going by the fear of failure theory) or because at least with the ffs gratification/payoff for effort is immediate compared to original stuff or uni work. Its a nice little niche at least.

I mean I do care about it its not "just" distraction but maybe ive been profaning it in that way... and so etimes I dont even do that and go for full unadulterated undebatable distraction; Line to 7 I guess. Tje only reason I spoke face to face to anyone else than the delivery guy this week is that I had some doctors appointments.

But not its distraction from stuff Im too lazy to do or even from pressure like I always thought. But from wanting things.

So the original fiction went great while it was a distraction from school not so much when its one of the things I most want and actually have the time to do it.

Even thought thats the most practiced skill I have that I never stopped working on since I was 10. 🤦‍♀️

I mean they already explained that its basically like meditation. Or weeds. Or popup ads. Youve got to click them away as they pop up.

I always told myself thst I didnt have to be happy... and thats not even untrue actually but it would sure be neat to be happy again one of these days.

#enneagram #enneagram type 5 #feelings #enneagram 5w4 #5w4

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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sothischickshe · 4 years

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writing ask meme: 28, 37, 45

Thanks!

28. Do not show an early draft to anyone

Disagree! I think ultimately it's personal preference, but I think this is bad blanket advice. I do think the advice about only showing an early draft to people you trust is good though (sorry I guess I'm instead answering the other one!).

I haven't properly attended to writing something other than fanfiction for a fair while. I don't tend to use a beta or have someone read my fic drafts at all, I just have a really bizarre editing process that I enjoy because I love tinkering and i feel like I have a sense of when it's ready? But for something with an original world and characters, I would definitely want someone's eyes on it! Probably multiple eyes, a lot!

I think for me, I might not want someone's eyes on it until I felt fairly happy with the draft, unless I was having a specific problem I wanted their help with addressing? Just because if you're not feeling confident with it, it can be hard to want to share it. And also, if you're going to go back and forth a lot you kinda want to have someone's peak ability to have energy about it at the right point?

Like I'm really lucky in that a lot of my friends are aspiring or professional writers, or work/ed in book publishing. I offered to be a beta reader for someone's novel (which I KNOW is gonna slap). I LOVE editing and feeding back, but a novel is long. Am I gonna have the wherewithal to read it through many many times? Once it is familiar to me will I be able to read it in an objective way (will I be able to say yes you're giving enough info here for it to be clear to the reader, when I know everything about this world and plot?) or pick up on how changing stuff around impacts the flow (when I've read it in multiple configurations and know what's gonna happen?).

She doesn't want beta readers to read it till she's in a position where she thinks she'd get the most out of them, and I think that totally makes sense!

I think for shorter fiction (or a chapter at a time) it's a lot easier to ask someone to read multiple drafts. [on a weird tangent, I think the last draft I asked someone to look at was an important work email ha ha]

But I do think: listen to people's critiques and feedback, but use your own judgement. You don't have to take every piece of advice (duh).

37. Do not start a sentence with a conjunction

Absolute nonsense quite frankly!!!! I love starting sentences/paragraphs with conjunctions!!! I love having sentences that are just conjunction/s!!!!

I mean I guess this is reasonable advice for academic writing...?

I suppose it also depends how pov-y you want writing to come across as? Internal monologue does not obey style guides, I'm almost sure! I think doing it gives writing more energy? Makes it feel more natural?

Maybe this is one of those areas where it's helpful to know the rules and be happy breaking them anyway...?

On the flip side, I don't think starting EVERY sentence (or even paragraph) with a conjunction is good. It loses impact that way and everything gets very samey.

45. Dialogue should be rhythmic

So this one is from Aaron sorkin, who is a scriptwriter.

I find it quite inspiring though, because whenever interviewers say he's really intelligent or knowledgeable he's like hmmm? No no I'm just a dumbfuck who likes hearing characters talk prettily. I make friends with smart people and rip off their babbling about technology or politics or whatever and put it in my characters' mouths but I make it siiiiiiing baybee! 😂

I think he was obsessed with screwball comedies etc, which have a very specific patter, one that you can def see emulated in his scripts. Which all sound... Like he wrote them! And I love that about them!

I think it's something worth thinking about for fanfiction of TV or movies, obviously it's translating to a different medium, but I think trying to capture the rhythmic nature of a show's dialogue is really fun (and the readers are entering into this with you, already knowing what that sounds like). I like writing, for lack of a better word, banter. And I'm quite a fan of describing dialogue rather than including it if it isn't fabulously interesting? Like 'he asked where she was going and she muttered several expletives as she strode away' rather than including everything as actual dialogue just because ppl are talking - I think that gives more weight to the words you want to focus in on.

#Writing #On writing #Fanfiction #Fanfic #Writing advice asks

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hencethebravery · 7 years

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Title: “Beating Hearts,” (1/1)

Summary: He assumes he’ll tell him before he leaves for active duty. That’d make sense, right? Only his tongue kinda gets caught in the back of his throat and all he can offer is a platonic pat on the back. David Nolan falls in love with his best friend. It is a mistake. CC AU.

Notes: @mahstatins sent me a snail mail fic prompt and this was it. Bask in the glory of her lovely handwriting. Title from “Beating Hearts” by King Charles. Which you should def listen to. Also on Ao3.

+ Killian’s practically one giant bruise the first time they meet. He’s small and thin and David overhears a library aid refer to him as “wild.” But he likes to share his lunch even though there’s not a lot of it, and he likes spitting in August Booth’s milk every time he picks on one of their classmates. The first time he’d caught him doing it, a giant glob of mucus hanging from the corner of his mouth, David had just sat there, slack-jawed, as Killian offered up a very lame “wink” using his left and right eye—mere moments before it plopped quite mercilessly into the carton below.

Thinking back, he’s shocked that they ever became friends. David was what some lovingly referred to as a goody-goody; a bright eyed, well-behaved little gentleman who very rarely got into trouble, if ever, and who performed quite adequately in all of his classes. As far as the rest of their community knew, his family was relatively normal, at least when they knew people were watching.

“Your da yells a lot,” Killian had observed one morning after their very first playdate, his brow furrowed as he searched around the table for the right color to use.

David hadn’t really known what to say, because yes, of course his father yelled a lot, but no one was supposed to know that. And if they did know, they certainly weren’t supposed to say anything about it.

“That’s ok,” he had continued, furiously filling in a ship’s sail with a bright, neon pink, “my da yells a lot too.”

If David had to pinpoint a guess, he’d have to say that was it. The moment he’d decided Killian would be a good friend. He never made a big deal of anything, or at least, he never made a big deal of the things that were bigger deals inside your own head. And a lot of things were insurmountable in his own head.

“Just put these in his drink,” Killian had suggested one day in middle school, dropping two pills into David’s hand. “Liam used to do it all the time. Old man was out for hours.”

It wasn’t all doom and gloom of course, the both of them faced their fair share of challenges, but it was also idyllic in a lot of ways. Growing older was a blessing for them both, but David couldn’t help but think of it as a bit of a curse when all his memories started to blur further and further together. Before Killian leaves for his first tour, he tries to think back and it’s not unlike sitting on a train. When you’re on the train, right? You look out the window and the world is just speeding past you without a care for how slow you’d like to be going—caring very little for what you’d like to remember, and if you try too hard to pick out anything specific you grow a bit nauseous.

There’s a few moments frozen in his mind, aside from the traumatic ones, which books have informed him he is helpless to forget and slated to remember for the rest of his life, that he returns to again and again, moments with Killian he prays he’ll never forget.

15.

It is August, school starts in one week, and they are mere days away from becoming high schoolers. Technically, Killian still has one more year in middle school, but his grades were so off-the-charts awesome, the administration had no choice but to advance him a year. Everyone was surprised, but David wasn’t. Not really. He’s seen the chest in Killian’s room—the one full of books that only Liam knows about. Secretly, he’d always hoped more people would notice how smart Killian is, even though it’s not really the “cool” thing to be. Regardless, he is proud to be one of the few people that always knew, and where have these people even been?

“You can’t really blame them, mate,” Killian says from his place at David’s side, legs dangling over the edge of the railing, “I was an ill-formed beastie.”

“I still don’t see why we have to do this,” David answers, swallowing nervously, the heat on the back of his neck almost unbearable. “The public pool would work just fine.”

“My apologies, do you prefer swimming in urine? Because I’d rather not.”

A lot of kids make this jump, it’s not a totally out-of-the-blue suggestion, but it is quite high up, and for all his righteous indignation, David’s never been as brave as he’d like. Not as brave as Killian. A truck zooms behind them, ruffling his hair and for the love of God, urine sounds damn fine right now.

In his memory, Killian is in technicolor and the rest of the world is sepia-toned. Kind of like The Wizard of Oz. He can remember the warmth of the air that day, how it had been so oppressively warm, even the odd breeze had failed to offer any relief. The smell of the lake beneath their feet, the fetidness of of still water and heavy, bloated plant life. At some point, Killian’s hand comes up to smack at a mosquito buzzing around his neck, and that’s when he’d noticed it—the shape of his jaw, the smattering of hair on his neck and chin, the elegant length of his fingers, the tips of them callused from all that guitar playing.

“You ready?” he had asked, seemingly oblivious to Dave’s attention, his eyes practically sparkling with excitement. “Shall we count to three?”

“We don’t need to ‘count to three,’” David mumbled, trying to ignore the tumult of anxious butterflies beating their wings against the inside of his stomach.

Killian grinned knowingly, grabbing David’s fingers and releasing his death-grip on the railing. The whole jump probably happened in about 5 seconds, but in David’s memory, time came to a grinding halt as they stood on that lip of concrete, the hot metal of the railing digging into their backs. He can recall the final squeeze of Killian’s fingers, the distant shout of a child, and then, “Three!”

Into the dark water they plunged, with Killian’s fingers still curled around his own.

It’s been two years since he laid eyes on Killian Jones. In that time he’s finished two years of undergrad, moved out of his parent’s house, adopted a dog, and written terrible poetry about Killian’s hands.

“Seriously, it’s fucking terrible.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself buck-o,” Ruby warbles pleasantly, falling onto his shoulder to maintain her balance. “I’m sure it’s perfectly lovely.”

Ruby is David’s roommate, but she’s almost never there. Which is... odd, but he can’t really judge her for it. He’s the idiot who’s been in love with his best friend for three years and never said anything. The unbelievably enormous idiot who let his best friend leave for the freaking Navy without telling him the truth.

“What if I never see him again? Do you realize that at any given moment this country is prepared to go to actual war? Like with… bullets and... stuff?”

“Excuse me, ‘and stuff?’” Ruby cackles, taking another swig of tequila, “I think it’s a little more complicated than that.”

“I don’t think so,” he answers, grabbing the bottle before it shatters against the pavement, “I listen to a lot of podcasts. I know what I’m talking about.”

12.

Killian’s father leaves around Christmas. Which is around when, incidentally, they get into their first big fight. They’ve had fights before of course, they’re full of weird hormones and their brains are basically on fire, it’s a miracle they can even hold a conversation. But this is one of those fights that makes David feel as if his heart has dropped into his stomach; and his throat is always sore, and even though his mom says it’s because he’s catching the bug that’s going around, he knows it’s because he hasn’t spoken to Killian in a week.

He had wanted to ditch school and steal cigarettes from the gas station on the corner. Started taking sips from Dave’s father’s liquor cabinet, not to mention blowing off all their friends so he could listen to angry music on his headphones and throw eggs off the highway overpass.

“You need to calm down or you’re gonna get in trouble,” Dave had insisted forcefully, the moral compass spinning wildly inside his head urging him to save his best friend from a terrible fate. In hindsight, he definitely made it worse. Nothing an angry, hurt kid hates more than being lectured by an equally dramatic, equally small know-it-all.

“Oh, I need to ‘calm down?’” Killian answered quietly, pulling the headphones down around his neck. “Why don’t you mind your own business for once?”

“I’m just trying to help you!”

It would be the first and only time they’d get into an actual, physical altercation. David doesn’t like to think about it much, but it is, unfortunately, one of those signs or landmarks that might catch your eye while you’re staring out the train window. The feeling of Killian’s hand against his shoulder, his own feet staggering backwards. The sound of his choked voice, the suspicious, wet sheen over his eyes.

“I don’t need your help!” he yelled, shoving him again, “No one asked you to be here. Go back home to your perfect little life, Dave.”

He’s not proud of how he reacted, he could’ve just let him walk away. But, ya know, he was twelve. He was living at home with an alcoholic father and a mother who didn’t do much to get him to stop. Killian knew exactly what buttons to push, even when they were too young to really know why. David Nolan, the perfect, polite student. Everyone spent so much time assuming his life was a fairytale, any adult worth their salt had consistently failed to notice that he was drowning. Except Killian. Which was probably why it hurt so bad.

The next thing he remembers there’s some unnamed teacher pulling him off the best friend he’s ever had, wiping some blood away from his lips.

“Don’t bother coming over for Christmas,” David hissed, his face red and sweaty, “no one ever wanted you there anyway.”

“Not a problem,” he answered with a suspicious sniffling of his nose, swinging his backpack over his shoulder. “See ya never.”

That had been the only Christmas they’d spent apart until recently, and it had taken David months to forgive himself, even though Killian had forgiven him fairly readily. As twelve year old boys are wont to do.

“I was a prat,” he had said softly, his lip still a bit swollen. “I just miss him. And Liam’s angry all the time.”

“It’s okay,” David muttered quickly, “do you wanna come over and play video games?”

This past Christmas, Killian had sent him a card with an old, vintage illustration of a whale hunt gone wrong. “Mistakes were made,” is printed across the bottom, and David actually snorts when he tries to contain the literal guffaw.

“It’s cold here,” the letter reads in Killian’s steady, artful hand, “I miss my bed, and the freedom to eat shite and watch television whenever I’d like. Hope you’re well, mate. Miss your pancakes.”

It’s signed with a dramatically large “K” next to a poorly drawn Christmas tree, and David’s heart clenches in his chest. He wraps up a paperback copy of Moby Dick and sends it off to Killian’s fleet, but not before writing a note on the inside cover about how the whale probably isn’t worth losing a limb over.

17.

The first time he wonders whether or not he might be a little bit in love with his best friend is right after he finds out that he’s enlisted. Not that he’s thinking of enlisting, or considering his other non-collegiate options; no, he’s already enlisted. To say he’s blindsided by the whole thing is an understatement, not to mention the scar on his hand from the second degree burn after the fact.

A camping trip in June, right after high school graduation but a few months before Dave leaves for college in Canada. Which Killian was sure to give him endless grief about, only after he was sure David would bring him anything and everything flavored like maple syrup. There’s this spot in the woods they’d discovered when they were kids, it’s the absolute perfect camping spot. Far enough away that you can’t hear the highway, but close enough that you could walk there mildly intoxicated and not vomit.

There’s a creek nearby, some convenient tree-cover for those hotter days, and the fire pit they’d built years ago is still intact, so at this point in their lives, the trip itself could barely be considered “camping.” Regardless, it’s still a blast every time they go, packing up Dave’s dad’s truck with snacks, booze, sleeping bags, and Killian’s shitty telescope. Dave’s in the middle of throwing a log on the fire when he hears the news, hence the burn.

“So, I know I told you I hadn’t decided on a school yet,” he begins, taking a drag of his cigarette, “but really it’s because I decided to enlist in the Navy—”

Dave hisses at the flame licking up his thumb as Killian continues as if he hadn’t heard, “...with Liam.”

David likes Liam just fine, ok? The two of them had it real rough growing up, and it’s not like David can say he’d do anything different. He didn’t raise a younger brother when he was barely grown himself, working multiple jobs and paying off his father’s debts. He certainly didn’t raise a Killian Jones, all honor and stubbornness and a tendency towards making truly boneheaded mistakes. But still, while he understands Killian’s adoration of the guy, he’s also heard the backhanded compliments, the unrealistic expectations. The freaking hour long lectures about what Killian is supposed to be doing with his life. And he’s seen Killian afterwards, pretending that he’s not absolutely crushed at this summation of his character by the one person he loves most in the world.

“Oh,” David finally says, cradling his injured hand towards his chest, “Why?”

“I don’t know, seems a bit more exciting than sitting in a classroom, doesn’t it?”

“I… guess.”

It’s hard to know what to say when his hand feels like it’s still on fire, afraid to look down and see deformed, burned flesh. It’s doubly hard to know what to say when his heart has started to pound in a familiar, yet entirely unfamiliar way. It hurts in that same way it did when he’d seen Katherine at the dance with Jefferson in 8th grade. This hopeless, aching echo inside of his chest. What the hell is that?

“Bloody hell, Dave. You want some ointment for that?”

And then there’s the hustle and bustle of Killian’s movements around the fire, searching around for bandages and water and more alcohol, only there’s a buzzing in Dave’s ear that just keeps getting louder with every passing moment.

“You’re leaving?” he asks as Killian kneels in front of him, gingerly wrapping gauze around his hand. He pauses about halfway through and sighs, his eyes never straying from his task.

“Yeah, mate. In a few weeks.”

They don’t talk for a bit after that, their silence made louder in the wake of the crackling fire and chirping insects. His hand still kills, but he figures it must be the adrenaline—the way Killian’s eyes shine just a bit bluer in the glow of the dying fire, how his breath sounds steady and safe in his ear. The feeling of his rough fingertips every time they pass over a piece of unburned flesh, the hair on the back of his neck standing up.

It’s the next morning, on their drive back home that he considers just how long he’d let their hands linger together in the quiet of Killian’s revelation. How maybe it stopped being about his totally avoidable injury and more about the fact of their impending separation.

“We’ll go for a jump off the bridge before you leave, right?” he asks in front of Killian’s house, trying for a smile and failing.

“Only of course,” he’d answered winningly, his features betraying not even a hint of distress. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

He doesn’t pick him up from the airport because the ambience of the airport is just asking for trouble. It’s a veritable melting pot of emotion. Whatever anyone’s feeling inside the airport at any given moment, chances are they’re feeling it at the absolute most that anyone could feel anything. No one is simply “happy” to see their loved one, rather, they’re overjoyed. You’re not “tired,” no, you’re fucking exhausted. He’s worried that, were he to pick Killian up from the airport, he’d do something ridiculous like run towards him in baggage claim and tackle him to the ground—or worse, make some bumbling confession of love. So, no, picking him up from the airport was definitely not an option.

He does have to show up at the welcome home party though, otherwise he’s just a dick.

“Dave!” Killian yells from somewhere in the crowd, his voice young and booming as he limps across the kitchen. “Was afraid you weren’t planning on showing, mate.”

“Of course not,” he answers, trying to avoid staring at his injured knee. Killian had already told him about the injury in a letter, something about an explosion below deck and being tossed into military grade hardware. No big deal. Sure.

“D’ya want a drink?”

The party is loud and hot and seems to go on forever. Killian and Liam’s house is filled with old friends from school, all of their faces blurring together with every new beer in his hand. Normally he’d be perfectly happy to catch up and reminisce, but on this night he plays the wallflower, awkwardly moving from conversation to conversation, trying to avoid the sound of Killian’s laugh and Killian’s voice and Killian’s hand on his shoulder every time he thinks he’s managed to escape.

He finally manages to stumble outside around 1 AM, his head only just starting to pound, and the notion of collapsing on top of his small, childhood bed is unlike any other feeling of relief he’s ever known in his life. He hears the “Oi!” at his back and tries very hard not to wince, turning to face Killian’s eager and slightly dejected grin.

“Where you off to?”

“Bed,” he answers sleepily, hoping to skip this conversation entirely, “gotta be up early in the morning.”

For one blissful moment, Killian looks contemplative, his hand coming up to artfully scratch at the almost-beard on his face. It had been too much to hope that he’d be able to leave with his dignity still intact, his secrets and bad poetry locked ever so carefully away. Far, far too much.

“How about a quick walk, then?” Killian asks quietly, suddenly appearing far more sober than David had thought. “For old time’s sake?”

They wind up at the old bridge of all places, a full moon shining dramatically over the surface of the still lake. It’s early fall, so it’s not bitterly cold yet, but pre-dawn hours in Maine can get pretty brisk, and David’s thankful for the thickness of the flannel around his shoulders. Killian’s outfit is far more impractical, which is just par for the course, really. Leather jacket zipped open, button-down shirt as equally revealing as the jacket that should do little in the way of warmth, but he seems to be faring just fine. Must be all those nights on the open ocean; far, far away from here.

“Do you recall the first time we jumped from here?” he asks in a whisper, his forearms leaning heavily against the rail.

“Yeah,” David replies, easily, as if he hadn’t obsessed over it for months. “Yeah, I remember.”

Killian pulls a cigarette out of his back pocket, and David makes a note of the slight shake in his hand as he lights it.

“So, you’re done now, right?” he asks hesitantly, breathing in the smoke and the cool crispness of the night air around them, the worn leather of Killian’s jacket. “You’re sticking around?”

“I don’t know,” smiling, crushing the butt of it against the railing and turning to stare up at the stars. “I was thinking of visiting Canada for a bit. Getting a look at the sights.”

This is it, David thinks, tracing the shape of Killian’s face in the moonlight, trying to ignore the new scar on his cheek, this is one of those things. Those memories, the ones you’re lucky enough to remember? It’s happening, right now, and he’s trying to be in the moment and appreciate it for what it is, only he’s having a hard time coming to grips with the fact that this could very well be one of those fleeting things—one of those inconsequential moments he won’t need to remember in 30 or 40 years.

That’s when he feels the warmth of Killian’s hand around his fingers, their roughness almost exactly as he can recall it in his memories of that night. It’s almost as if he can feel every line in his skin, every new layer of grief and hardship and happiness and it’s curving so wonderfully against the softness of his own.

“You are thinking far too loudly.”

Killian’s voice his hovering somewhere near the shell of his ear, soft and husky and full of delicious, heated breath that smells of tobacco and rum. The tip of his nose is somewhere around there too, perhaps resting closer to his earlobe, maybe at the corner of his jaw, but then it’s the brief wetness of his lips, the tip of his tongue.

“Killian—”

You know a kiss by the way it urges you to forget yourself. You can guess at its merit by how little you concern yourself with what might come after, or even what might have come before. The only other thing he can feel in that moment, aside from Killian’s lips against his own, is the feeling of his hand on the back of his head, his fingers tugging on his hair. He’d make a joke about trying to get his attention, only it’s pretty well in hand at the moment.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for ages,” Killian breathes the words into his mouth, his fingers loosening their grip in order to run down the length of his neck. “All I could think about.”

“Since when?”

“I don’t know,” he laughs, a strange shyness overtaking his countenance, “since I ever started wanting to kiss anybody.”

“I wish you’d told me sooner, could’ve saved the both of us a lot of trouble.”

“I know,” he answers, pulling away to look him in the eye. There’s a contentment there, something David had rarely seen in all the years they’d known one another, and he can only hope that it’s reflected back in his own; this feeling like maybe they were supposed to end up here all along.

Their fingers weave together and David can hear a dog bark, a car revving it’s engine, the water rippling beneath them with the breeze. It’s not totally unlike any other time they’d been here together, waiting for the jump, that feeling of weightlessness carrying them through one moment to the next. And but for the moon shining overhead the moment is the same, the two of them, side-by-side, falling through the air.

#ouat ff #cc ff #cc fanfic #captain charming #cc: saved my life #@hencethewriter #fic requests #mahstatins #ilu clare #i hope this meets ur expectations

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movedto-insom-art · 7 years

Note

hi!! i just found you while poking around for gobelins students on twitter and i love your art, congratulations on passing!! i was wondering if you have any advice on the written exam or tips on how to prepare for it? i heard that the written exam can be given in english if french isn't your first language...

I’ll try to be very concise about this andmaybe pin it to my profile because I was in your shoes exactly a year ago, andif I made it here I think you have a considerable chance of making it too as long as you’re willing to put work into it. I want totell you what I wish I had been told.

Disclaimer: I’m definitely not the best personto ask. I’m self-taught and my situation may and will differ a lot from yours,but on top of that, bear in mind Gobelins has a ~5% admission rate. During theinterview I shared room with a person who had a stunning portfolio and had been doing two years of prepclasses to get in Gobelins specifically and didn’t get in. I don’t even understand what brought me in, but I will try to at least give you a detailedguide of what *I* did to prepare.

Important: READ THE “MODALITÉSD'ADMISSION” DOCUMENT THREE TIMES AT LEAST. It has so much usefulinformation and so many points you can’t afford to skip. If your French isflaky, ask for a friend who speaks it fluently to help you out. You *must*understand it fully if you want to get in and avoid needless calls to theschool.

Also, keep an eye on the website often. Allthe information I provide here vis a vis dates only applies to a time periodthat’s already gone and I can’t predict if the dates will be exactly the sameevery year, so double check for yourself!

French

If you don’t speak French now start asap, anddo your Duolingo and “Apprendre le Français avec TVMonde” exercisesevery day. The lessons for the 4-year program are in French and while they canbe understanding with foreigners I just strongly recommend for the sake ofcommon sense that you pick up the language, just to make the most of the chanceif you’re given it.

However, you can def do the written exam in English! The exam will be printed and handed to you in both languages, it’s not so much a test to see your writing skills (ironically) than it is to prove your drawing ones.

If you pass that first round, while they won’t require any certification, they *will* test how good you are understanding and responding in French during the interview process of the second round.

I also recommend you take special conversational classeswith a private teacher or with a French speaker the couple of weeks before theoral exam to really gain fluidity, it makes a difference.

Mental Health

Preparing for all this will be sustainedstress over a long period of time. While it’ll be intensive and will demand alot of you, bear in mind that a mentality of “every minute I spend notworking on this is a minute lost” is only going to harm you. It’s alrightto take breaks, have a social life, and space for leisure while you do prepwork. It’s alright to not be drawing every single hour and rest your mind soyou can go back to work with all your might.

Try to be demanding and to pushyourself out of your comfort zone, but do it at your own pace and alwaysleaving space for breaks and stuff that will take your mind away from it whenyou need to, like friends, videogames, or just drawing for fun. A healthy business to leisure ratio is always between ½ and 2/3.

Meditate if you can, too, just 10-15 minutesevery day. I recommend the Headspace app and it has helped me keep my coolduring really tense moments.

Open Days

Go to the open days at Gobelins in January ifyou can! I took a plane for the weekend just to go, it was expensive but Ireally, really do not regret it. Here’s why:

DONOT MISS THE FIRST DAY. They hold portfolio reviews and while you may not haveyours ready just yet, it’s the perfect chance to get an insider point of viewof how well you’re doing right now and how far from your goal you are. Make aprovisional one (or do like I did and just make a tumblr blog and throw inwhatever you’d want them to assess) and arrive early to ask for a spot at thequeue.

Youget to talk to other first-year students, who will showcase their portfolio andanswer all your questions about the admission process, the school and whateverother questions you may have.

Youget to attend conferences where they explain each of their programs in detail,and the head of the department will also answer all yourquestions.

Admissions usually open right in the middle of the open days. By all means grab a seat at the computer room and save yourself a spot in the exam process asap.

Also,if you’re a foreigner like me, you should totally go to the international classand see if you can spot somebody from your same country (or who at least speaksyour language) to hang out with for a bit.

Site note: That international class is adirect entry to 3rd year specifically for English-speaking students who alreadyhave animation experience. I didn’t apply for that so I can’t tell you muchabout it, but it’s definitely worth checking out if you want in, they say it’seasier than the main track, too.

Preparing for the written exams

First off, draw every day. Even if it’s notprep work or studies all the time, you can indulge in your OCs, OTPs, whatevermakes your heart race, but draw it and do it every day. It doesn’t have to beideal or finished either, but what really matters is that you get used todrawing a lot and make a habit of it. Quantity, consistency and speed areimportant skills for animators to have as I’ve been told and they will be looking for it since one of the parts of the inteview includes evaluating how much paper you’ve filled in a year.

Grab all the exams you can get a hold of fromthe Gobelins site and do them in the specified time (they’re on the Concepteuret Realisateur de Film d'Animation class page). When you’re done with that do themagain. Ask for feedback from your teachers and improve on them. Take aperspective book (I recommend “Perspective for Comic Artists”), take a gesturedrawing book (“The Vilppu Drawing Manual” or “Gesture drawingfor animation”), take a storyboarding and character design class (I tookSchoolism’s, which are 15$/month per class, it’s very affordable) and that’llgive you a good frame of reference. And when you’re done with the exams andknow them by heart, make your own exercises. Then do the exams again. Andalways ask for feedback, critique to train yourself against every weak pointthat you don’t want the jury to catch you doing when you do the actual exam.

Sign up for figure drawing class right now,with or without teacher (I signed up to an art club without one), the soonerthe better, and go there frequently, once or twice per week, to the short posessessions (up to 15 minutes per pose, 2 to 5 minutes would be ideal). Don’tbother doing portraits or long poses because again, what you want is to producea lot, fast. Put a lot of focus on gesture drawing, movement and speed. It’llnot only be a big chunk of your portfolio if you do pass the first round, butit hones your draftsmanship like no other exercise. You can additionally trainat home with websites like QuickPoses or the New Masters Academy figure drawingvideos, but I’d really want to stress that live models work so much bettersince they force you to interpret a 3D person.

Go to your local zoo as well, once a week oronce a fortnight, and do animal studies. If you can bring a friend it’ll help alot making it more fun but try to get used to drawing shapes that are nothuman. Understand their anatomy and try to apply what you’re learning aboutgesture from the figure drawing classes.

Draw in the street, in museums, go to a placethat inspires you or that you find curious and draw it. Draw the people topractice your characterization and caricature skills. Draw buildings to showyour perspective skills. And just whatever catches your eye. Environments and perspective are important and I strongly recommend you start by drawing from observation.

If you have a cool idea in mind or find agood exercise on tumblr to try that isn’t this, do it! The teachers appreciateinterest in several fields and if you can showcase that you’re a curiousstudent with plenty of interests they’ll consider you more seriously. I didconcept art and digital painting on the side and it ended up being a mainthing of my personal project.

And finally, go to @gobelins andraid it for advice, it’s a great point of reference to start with as well. Goto the current @crfa20 and past CRFA blogs to see what the students are up to if youwant inspo and check their profiles too.

Do this for the whole year.

Admissions open inJanuary and the earlier you can sign in the better (especially if you are aforeigner like me, you must get the equivalence with French studies recognizedofficially asap, it usually takes a while to get and it’s necessary).

On a side note, for the written exam, simplifyyour tools. You don’t have much time to elaborate or fix your mistakes so Iwould recommend you do your practice with pens (so you get used to not erasinglines and being confident with your strokes) and pencils (especially if you canget both regular, mechanical and color pencils to layer your drawings forcomplex exercises like perspective). During the exam don’t even think aboutbringing pens in case you do make mistakes you need to erase though, they arejust really good training.

Side note: if you can, all this while, make space for personal projects.Nothing that you must finish, but just produce a lot of your own content. Pick apodcast and do visual development for it, do fanart, iterate on a movie’s shots, developyour own stories through visual storytelling, do character design, storyboards,comics. Steal ideas if you must to get the creative juices flowing (but don’tpost it or pretend they are your own :V). Get acquainted with projects, explore a fewideas so that the moment you’re out of the exam room when you’re done with thewritten exam you not only have a deck of projects to choose from but are alsoacquainted with the process of carrying one forward (and also have a littlework already done).

Preparing for the oral exam

The oral exam consists of 3 parts.

A first part in which you’re not present, andthe jury will judge your portfolio, sketchbooks and demo reel without you for 30 minutes.

A second part, where you must introduce thejury to an original personal project of your own made for the admissionprocess, and defend it (in French).

A third part, where the jury will just ask youquestions (they’re usually very friendly) and judge your viability as a futureclassmate. Just be yourself!

The portfolio should just have your best, besweet, short and to the point. There is a limit of 40 pages including coversand the personal project so choose your best pieces from between your projectsand your practice. It should also cover three main points

Your skillset, which should be covered byyour studies, schoolwork, observation work and partly (but not mainly) the rest of your artwork.

Your capacity for creation and personal vision(aka what your interests are as an artist), which should be covered by the restof your artwork and other projects of your own.

Your capacity to convey and develop ideas, messages andstories through visual narration, which should be your main, personal project.

I recommend you throw in both sketches andunfinished stuff along with your most detailed and refined pieces so the jurycan have a good idea of your process, your way of solving problems and how faryour skills go. Storyboards, animatics and comics will always be a positivesince you’re aiming to study a medium that is sequential.

Also, if you can, pick other students’ portfolios for reference. They don’t need to be Gobelins or even students though, if you find a good philosophy to build your portfolio around, by all means go for it. It’ll give you a good idea of what needs to be there and what can be left out.

Lastly, while they stress that you *don’t* need toknow animation to get in since that’s what you’re applying to, you can bring ina 2-minute demo reel. I made mine with an animatic and a few animationexercises on my own, but I want to repeat what they told me, the intentionisn’t to show how good you are at it already (then what can they teach you?)but to show that you’re interested in the medium and are eager to learn.

Final note

You’re applying for an animation school, keepthat in mind always. An animator is not an illustrator or a concept artist(even if they can easily become one), and what sets them apart in my opinion is the focus on speed, gesture, quantity, and most importantly, making drawings that feel alive andthat tell something. Understand the craft, ask other animators, read books onanimation, anything you can get your hands on will help.

One of the points that I feel are the mostimportant about all this is included in the Modalités d'Admission text, whichsays that they look into a quality that would literally translate to “opennessof spirit”. I think that speaks for how open minded you are to new ideas,to working with others, to learning and to considering new points of view.

Again I don’t have all the answers, but if youare “open of spirit” and really make an effort to dive into theanimation world, look for resources and friends in this world I’m certainyou’ll find them.

#gobelins #daeseungie

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faizrashis1995 · 4 years

Text

5 Steps to Learning Python the Right Way

Python is an important programming language that any developer should know. Many programmers use this language to build websites, create learning algorithms, and perform other important tasks. But trying to learn Python can be intimidating, frustrating, and difficult, especially if you’re not sure how to approach it.

One of the things that I found most frustrating when I was learning Python was how generic all the learning resources were. I wanted to learn how to make websites using Python, but it seemed like every learning resource wanted me to spend two long, boring, months on Python syntax before I could even think about doing what interested me.

This mismatch made learning Python quite intimidating for me. I put it off for months. I got a couple of lessons into the Codecademy tutorials, then stopped. I looked at Python code, but it was foreign and confusing:

from django.http import HttpResponse

def index(request):

return HttpResponse("Hello, world. You're at the polls index.")

The code above is from the tutorial for Django, a popular Python website development framework.

Experienced programmers will often throw snippets like the above at you. “It’s easy!”, they’ll promise. But even a few seemingly simple lines of code can be incredibly confusing. For instance, why is one line indented? What’s django.http? Why are some things in parentheses? Understanding how everything fits together when you don’t know much Python can be very hard.

The problem is that you need to understand the building blocks of the Python language to build anything interesting. The above code snippet creates a view, which is one of the key building blocks of a website using the popular MVC architecture. If you don’t know how to write the code to create a view, it isn’t really possible to make a dynamic website.

Most tutorials and Python courses assume that you need to learn all of Python syntax before you can start doing anything interesting. This is what leads to months spent just on syntax, when what you really want to be doing is analyzing data, or building a website, or creating an autonomous drone.

More often than not, spending all that time learning rote syntax leads to your motivation ebbing away, and to you just calling the whole thing off. I like to think of this as the “cliff of boring”. Many courses well tell you that you need to be able to climb the “cliff of boring” to make it to the “land of interesting stuff you work on” (better name pending).

But that’s not the only way to learn Python!

After facing the “cliff of boring” a few times and walking away, I found a process that worked better for me. Specifically, I found a way to blend learning the basics with building interesting things. In a way, I walked around the “cliff of boring” and headed straight for the top. I spent as little time as possible learning the basics, then immediately dove into creating things that interested me.

In this blog post, I’ll show you step by step how to replicate this process, regardless of why you want to learn Python. It all starts with finding your motivation

1. Figure Out What Motivates You to Learn Python

Before you start diving into learning Python online, it’s worth asking yourself why you want to learn it. This is because it’s going to be a long and sometimes painful journey. Without enough motivation, you probably won’t make it through. Make no mistake, even when you skip the “cliff of boring,” learning Python is still challenging.

Plus, motivation matters! I slept through high school and college programming classes when I had to memorize syntax and I wasn’t motivated. On the other hand, when I needed to use Python to build a website to automatically score essays, I stayed up nights studying to finish it.

In other words: it’s much easier to learn something when you have a reason to learn.

Figuring out what motivates you will help you figure out an end goal, and a path that gets you there without boredom. You don’t have to figure out an exact project, just a general area you’re interested in as you prepare to learn Python.

Pick an area you’re interested in, such as:

Data science / Machine learning

Mobile apps

Websites

Games

Hardware / Sensors / Robots

Scripts to automate your work

Yes, you can make robots using Python! From the Raspberry Pi Cookbook.

Figure out one or two areas that interest you, and that you’re willing to stick with. You’ll be gearing your learning towards them, and eventually will be building projects in those areas, so choose things you’re actually interested in.

2. Learn the Basic Syntax

Unfortunately, this step can’t be skipped. You have to learn the very basics of Python syntax before you dive deeper into your chosen area. You want to spend as little time as possible on this, as it isn’t very motivating. I personally made it about 30% into the Codecademy Python tutorials, which was enough.

Here are some good resources to help you learn the basics:

Codeacademy — does a good job of teaching basic syntax, and builds on itself well.

Learn Python the Hard Way — a book that teaches Python concepts from the basics to more in-depth programs.

Dataquest – Python Programming Fundamentals — I started Dataquest to make learning Python and data science easier. Dataquest teaches Python syntax in the context of learning data science. For example, you’ll learn about for loops while analyzing weather data. This course, and our intermediate Python course, are both free. We also have a lot of free Python tutorials.

The Python Tutorial — the tutorial on the main Python site.

I can’t emphasize enough that you should only spend the minimum amount of time possible on basic syntax. The quicker you can get to working on projects, the faster you will learn. You can always refer back to the syntax when you get stuck later. You should ideally only spend a couple of weeks on this phase, and definitely no more than a month.

3. Make Structured Projects

Once you’ve learned the basic syntax, it’s possible to start making projects on your own. Projects are a great way to learn, because they let you apply your knowledge. Unless you apply your knowledge, it will be hard to retain it. Projects will push your capabilities, help you learn new things, and help you build a portfolio to show to potential employers.

However, very freeform projects at this point will be painful — you’ll get stuck a lot, and need to refer to documentation. Because of this, it’s usually better to make more structured projects until you feel comfortable enough to make projects completely on your own. Many learning resources offer structured projects, and these projects let you build interesting things in the areas you care about while still preventing you from getting stuck.

If you’re interested in learning Python for data science, each of our data science courses ends with a structured guided project that helps you apply your new skills creatively without totally dropping you into the deep end.

But you may be interested in Python because you want to make a game, or work in robotics, or do something else, so let’s take a look at some other great resources for finding structured projects you can dig into:

Data Science / Machine Learning

Dataquest — As mentioned previously, our courses teach interactively by asking you to write real code to analyze real-world data, and each course ends with a guided project.

Python for Data Analysis — A book written by the author of a major Python data analysis library, it’s a good introduction to analyzing data in Python, and it will help you learn some of the skills you’ll need for building data science projects.

Scikit-learn documentation — Scikit-learn is the main Python machine learning library. It has some great documentation and tutorials you can work through to get a feel for how it’s used.

CS109 — A Harvard class that teaches Python for data science. They have some of their projects and other materials online, and you can give them a try even if you’re not enrolled in the course.

Building Mobile Apps

Kivy guide — Kivy is a tool that lets you make mobile apps with Python. They have a guide on how to get started.

Websites

Flask tutorial — Flask is a popular web framework for Python. This is the introductory tutorial.

Bottle tutorial — Bottle is another web framework for Python. This is how to get started with it.

How To Tango With Django — A guide to using Django, a complex Python web framework.

Games

Codecademy — Has ineractive lessons that walk you through making a couple of simple games.

Pygame tutorials — Pygame is a popular Python library for making games, and this is a list of tutorials for it.

Making games with Pygame — A book that teaches you how to make games in Python.

Invent your own computer games with Python — Another book that walks you through how to make several games using Python.

An example of a game you can make with Pygame. This is Barbie Seahorse Adventures 1.0, by Phil Hassey.

Hardware / Sensors / Robots

Using Python with Arduino — Learn how to use Python to control sensors connected to an Arduino.

Learning Python with Raspberry Pi — Build hardware projects using Python and a Raspberry Pi. The sky is really the limit here, but this page will give you some ideas for places to start.

Learning Robotics using Python — A book that will help you learn how to build robots using Python.

Raspberry Pi Cookbook — Another book that’s focused on helping your learn how to build robots using a Raspberry Pi and Python.

Scripts to Automate Your Work

Automate the Boring Stuff with Python — A classic Python book that will help you learn how to automate everyday tasks using Python.

Once you’ve done a few structured projects in your own area, you should be able to move into working on your own totally unique projects. And because you’ll have been experimenting and working in your area of interest as you worked through those structured projects, you’ll probably have some cool ideas. But, before you dive completely into a passion project, it’s important to spend some time learning how to solve problems.

4. Work on Projects on Your Own

Once you’ve completed some structured projects, it’s time to work on your own unique projects. On your journey to learn Python, it’s hard to know how much you’ve really learned until you step out and try to build something on your own. You’ll still be consulting resources and learning new concepts as you work, but you’ll be working on whatever you want to work on.

Before you dive into working on your own projects, you should feel comfortable debugging errors and problems with your programs. Here are some resources that will help:

StackOverflow — A community question and answer site where people discuss programming issues. You can find Python-specific questions here. You can ask your own questions if you need to, but often a search will reveal that someone else has already asked your question and gotten a good answer for it.

Google — Believe it or not, this is the most commonly used tool of every experienced programmer. Very useful when trying to resolve errors. Here’s an example.

Python’s official documentation — This is a good place to find reference material on Python.

Once you have a solid handle on debugging issues, you it’s time to dive into your own projects. Work on things that interest you. For example, I was interested in the idea of automated stock trading. That’s what motivated me, so I started working on tools to trade stocks automatically very soon after I learned the basics of Python programming.

Here are some tips for finding interesting projects:

Extend the projects you were working on previously, and add more functionality.

Go to Python meetups in your area, and find people who are working on interesting projects.

Find open source packages to contribute to.

See if any local nonprofits are looking for volunteer developers.

Find projects other people have made, and see if you can extend or adapt them. Github is a good place to find these.

Browse through other people’s blog posts to find interesting project ideas.

Think of tools that would make your every day life easier, and build them.

Remember to start very small. It’s often useful to start with things that are very simple so you can gain confidence. It’s better to start a small project you actually finish than a huge project that never gets done.

It’s also useful to find other people to work with for more motivation.

If you really can’t think of any good project ideas, here are some in each area we’ve discussed:

Data Science / Machine Learning

A map that visualizes election data by state.

An algorithm that predicts the weather where you live.

A tool that predicts the stock market.

An algorithm that automatically summarizes news articles.

You could make a more interactive version of this map. From RealClearPolitics.

Mobile Apps

An app to track how far you walk every day.

An app that sends you weather notifications.

A realtime location-based chat app.

Websites

A site that helps you plan your weekly meals.

A site that allows users to review video games.

A note-taking platform.

Games

A location-based mobile game, where you capture territory.

A game where players must write code to solve puzzles.

Hardware / Sensors / Robots

Build sensors that monitor your house remotely (temperature, moisture, CO2 levels, etc).

Build a smarter alarm clock.

Create a self-driving robot that detects obstacles.

Scripts to Automate Your Work

A script to automate data entry.

A tool to scrape data from a website you frequent.

A script that reminds you to stand up once every hour.

The first project I built on my own was adapting my automated essay scoring algorithm from R to Python. It didn’t end up looking pretty, but it gave me a sense of accomplishment, and started me on the road to building my skills.

Remeber, there aren’t really any wrong answers here. The key is just to pick something and do it. If you get too hung up on picking the perfect project, there’s a risk that you’ll never make one.

5. Keep Working on Progressively Harder Projects

Once you’ve finished the first one, keep increasing the difficulty and scope of your projects. If you’re completely comfortable with what you’re building, that means it’s time to try something harder. That could mean starting a new and more difficult project, adding complexity to your current project, or taking on an entirely different sort of challenge.

Here are some ideas for increasing the difficulty of your projects to ensure that you’re still progressing in your learning:

Try teaching a novice how to build a project you made. Nothing forces you to really learn a subject quite like having to teach it

Can you scale up your tool? Can it work with more data, or can it handle more traffic?

Can you make your program run faster?

Can you make your tool useful for more people?

How would you commercialize what you’ve made?[Source]-https://www.dataquest.io/blog/learn-python-the-right-way/

Advanced level python classes in thane with 100% Job Assistance Guarantee Provided. We Have 3 Sessions Per Week And 90 Hours Certified Basic Python Classes In Thane Training Offered By Asterix Solution

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Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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Mother’s Day Gift Guide: Gifts For The Regular Mom, The Cool Mom & Everyone In Between

What greater holiday is there than a day that celebrates the strong, beautiful women who raised us? Go ahead, try to think of one, Ill wait. 4th of July you say? Okay. Anyway, Mothers Day really does serve as a reminder that we should be really really nice to all the moms in our lives because we too may be mothers some day and we dont want a bitchy daughter who doesnt appreciate us. So its good karma to get them a gift, right? A betchs mom is the most important lady in her life. Shes given us endless words of wisdom on fuckboys, shes reluctantly allowed us to borrow steal her clothes, and she always picked us up from school when we were feeling sick. Shes molded us into the betch we are today, and for that we are forever grateful. To show her how much you love her, were giving you a list of all our favorite brands/gift ideas that are perfect for every type of mom in your life. Welcome to the Betches Mother’s Day Gift Guide 2017.

FOR THE MOM WHO STILL GRABS CANDY FOR HERSELF AT THE CHECKOUT COUNTER

Hats off to this mom, she still answers to her sugar cravings and DGAF. Elevate her candy standards with Sugarfinas Sweetest Mom Candy Bento Box and watch it disappear within 20 minutes of her opening it. If shes into the juicing craze like any betchy mom, feel free to gift her a bottle of Pressed Juicery x Sugarfinas green juice gummy bears. Its the perfect candy she can eat while convincing herself that shes healthy AF. These are the chicest and yummiest candies ever, and Im sure this mom wont mind if you steal a few for yourselfmaybe

FOR THE ZEN AF MOM YOU CAN ALWAYS VENT TO

This mom is amazing because she has the patience to listen to us talk shit about irrelevant shit for hours and somehow make us feel 10 times better in the end. Philosophy is a fave brand of ours, not just because of their amazing products, but also because of their values. Its the wellness brand version of the mom who always sends you inspirational articles and makes sure you never leave the house without food in your stomach. To reward this woman for putting up with your crazy ass, give her the Moments of Grace boxthe perfect set of shower, fragrance, and moisturizing products.

FOR THE MOM WHO KNOWS HOW TO MAKE A HOUSE A HOME (AND WONT LET YOU EAT ON THE COUCH)

This mom might have come off as a little strict and slightly neurotic due to her strict house rules you lived under as a young betch, but you now understand it was all worth it for the image of a perfect home. Shes classy, shes elegant, and shes not afraid to tell you to fuck off when you deserve it. Giving her a Venus Et Fleur box is not just giving her clich flowers for Mothers Day, its giving her a centerpiece for her precious home. These are the most beautiful flowers and they last for an entire year. There are several colors to choose from so you can def find one to match the living room couch. PS, theyre having a pop-up shop at Saks specifically for Mothers Day, so go with your siblings and get her the most Instagrammable flowers ever.

FOR THE MOM WHO WANTS TO BE INA GARTENS BEST FRIEND

This mom spends half her life watching the Food Network and the other half begging her husband to agree to redoing the kitchen. As such, she takes great pride in all her kitchen essentials, and each time you come home theres a new blender or toaster. Although you have barely any space for a wooden spoon in your apartments kitchen and deem it acceptable to microwave water for your tea, this mom would rather be caught dead than without at least 25 different spatula options. Cuisinart is the perfect place to find the best and newest kitchen products that this mom will die over, like the QuicKettle and the PrepExpress. If you get her any of their products, I foresee massive amounts of free food in your future.

FOR THE MOM WHOS NOT AFRAID TO BLACK OUT AT FAMILY DINNERS

This mom is always invited to hang with you and your friends whenever shes in town. As a betch who can single-handedly create a party out of thin air, her Mothers Day gift needs to suit her hostess needs. Kim Crawford Wine is the perfect bottle to whip out on any given occasion, and with summer around the corner, it is officially ros season. Their website has tons of amazing recipes, including fros, sothis mom will def exploit a bottle of Kim Crawford ros for all its worth. If she also happens to be an Insta whore, were sorry in advance.

FOR THE MOM WHO GIFTED YOU YOUR WITTY SENSE OF HUMOR

This mom has passed on her good genes of having no filter and always has the entire family in tears at Thanksgiving dinner (like, the good kind). We were always afraid of what kind of backhanded bitchy comment she might make at our frenemies when we were younger, but we loved her anyway and secretly enjoyed it. If shes begging you not to get her anything this year, at least get her the perfect card from Shop Betches.

FOR THE MOM WHOS PUTTING OFF BOTOX FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE

This mom has had perfect skin her entire life and is now in overdrive doing everything she can to keep it that way. Washing her face isnt just something she does a couple times a day, its now an insane obsession. To make sure this mom is getting the most out of her incessant face cleansing, get her the Soniclear brush from Michael Todd Beauty. The antimicrobial brush stays cleaner and fresher for longer, and cleans deep into your pores. Lets be real, youre probs going to get one for yourself as well. Also, since shes probs big into blending, you should get her the Sonicblend brush to apply her makeup flawlessly.

FOR THE MOM WHO WON’T LET YOU ANYWHERE NEAR HER KITCHEN

This mom has a panic attack whenever there’s too many people in the kitchen (which for the most part means if there’s anyone in there besides her). She’s a firm believer in “a place for everything and everything in its place”, which as a betch you can only relate to on the level of your apartment’s bar cart. Joseph Joseph has the perfect modern organizational kitchen shit that will perfectly encourage this mom’s obsessive compulsive habits, but at least the kitchen will look sleek AF so who cares. We love their Nesting Bowl Sets and their super chic Worktop Savers.

FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS FALLS ASLEEP WITH HER IPAD ON HER FACE

This mom can’t get enough of her Facebook feed and loves to send you videos of dogs at all hours of the night. She probably thinks she’s squinting at all her screens because she’s old, but really it’s because no ones eyes should not be staring at this shit all day. Felix Gray glasses are v trendy-looking and protect your eyes from the blue light emitted from all our electronics’ screens, so mom won’t have to fight through the headaches to continue scrolling through Insta anymore. Our offices fan favorites are the Turing and Nash frames.

FOR THE MOM WHO JUICED BEFORE IT WAS COOL

This mom has been a juice drinking yoga freak since before you were born, and she’s always looking for new ways to show the world that she’s healthier and has more of her shit together than anyone else. Daily Harvest delivers fresh soups, smoothies, chia parfaits and overnight oats to your door on your schedule. This way, mom can get her fav smoothies delivered at 3pm just in time for her to consume before her 5pm spin class. If you didn’t think eating healthy could be convenient, neither did we, but here we are.

FOR THE MOM WHO HAS EVERYTHING YOU NEVER KNEW YOU NEEDED

This mom may seem like a hoarder, but in reality she’s just a collector of random shit that will impress people. Totally different. Also, we are not ones to talk about hoarding as evidenced by our closets. Anyway, Tovolo is the perfect place to shop for this mom because while it’s super fun for us to look through all the fun kitchen gadgets they have, it will be that much more fun for her because she’ll know exactly what to do with whatever you get her. “OMG, skull ice molds?! This will be perfect for Debbie’s divorce party!” We love their Clear Ice System and Stainless Steel Cocktail Shaker.

FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS LOSES SHIT

As a young mom, this one relied on her children to remind her of her dentist appointments or whenever she accidentally left the stove on. Though shes the most scatter-brained person you know, shes so lovable youve never (really) faulted her for it. Plus, her lack of having her shit together taught you how to be a proactive, multitasking betch. To make this moms life a little easier as her brain is only getting worse with age (sorry but its true), get her Tile for Mothers Day so you never have to get another phone call about her missing keys again. All she has to do is attach the little Tile to whatever it is she loses every day and connect it to her phone through Bluetooth and voil, when she needs to find either thing she can make em ring (I did not do that on purpose but I apologize).

FOR THE MOM WHO REALLY WANTS TO LOSE 3 POUNDS BUT HATES THE GYM

This mom might sound very familiar because she is all of us. She would much rather spend an hour at book club talking shit than hitting the gym, but the thought of showing up to Southampton for the summer in her current state is freaking her out. Do her a favor and buy her HUM Nutritions Skinny Bird, a natural weight loss supplement. If youre feeling really generous, they also have a Turn Back Time supplement that helps with skin cell protection. Time to pop some pills!

FOR THE BRAND NEW MOM

This mom has been MIA because she is now with child and a real human and also struggling to get more than 4 hours of sleep at night. Brighten up her day by getting her little Betch In Training a baby onesie from Shop Betches.

FOR THE MOM WHO IS ALWAYS ON THE GO

This mom has always been your business betch inspiration, as youve admired her for balancing her work and home life so well. Despite being super important at her company, she somehow found the time to proofread all your high school papers and prepped you for every job interview youve ever had. Soap & Glory is the perfect cheeky and empowering cosmetic brand that this mom absolutely NEEDS in her life. Since shes always running from mandatory family breakfast to business meeting, get her some of our favorites like their Rushower Dry Shampoo and their Hand Food hydrating hand cream.

FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS KEEPS IT SIMPLE

This mom is a woman of few words, but always knows what to say. You can find her in the yoga studio in the morning and hosting a charity dinner party by night. Shes the one who taught you that doing things for others is like, important. Not one for flashy things but a lover of the arts, this mom would love a piece from Adam Marc Jewelry. Our favorite pieces are the Kim Star Choker and the Rafaeli 14k Gold Bar Necklace. Use code BETCHES20 for 20% offyour mom will never have to know you didn’t pay full price.