5 & 8 about the Crow !!! :) (Bloody Crow/Luther ahah)
MY BELOVED <333 THANK YOU!
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(5) Oh my Kos, this a complicated one. It gets a little crazy, but to explain—basically he had three stages in his life that sort of affect how he related to other people, and each one is a different level of complex.
I’ll start with how he was as a child.
Basically little Crow/Luther was an absolute angel of a child, and literally couldn’t hurt a fly without apologizing. He was shy around others, and sometimes had a difficult time reading social cues, understanding certain expressions, and reading emotions in others, but he cared about that and sought for help from older figures like Maria. He really cared about being accepted and seen as worthwhile by other children and especially adults. He wasn’t ever rude or abrasive, and his anger was a rarity. Adults knew he was a quiet and peaceful child. Just an overall sweetheart, really.
But there was a deep-rooted insecurity that caused him to feel incredibly inadequate and disliked if he wasn’t able to receive approval from those he looked up to. I don’t know else to say it other than being loved and accepted was -extremely important- to him as a child, and if he felt it wavering, he’d spiral into fits of self-loathing and intense anxiety. It wasn’t at all healthy for a child his age, and it wasn’t a normal level of insecurity by any means. You can thank a particular parent for that 👍
Fears of rejection by others, fears of being seen as weak/frail, and fears of being left behind/abandoned were huge factors in how he approached his family and friends. He had to make sure that he made them proud and that they valued him. Unfortunately, not everyone realized this in time, and that’s where we jump into the next stage.
Young adult Crow had gone through some utterly horrific things, and there was absolutely no chance he was mentally stable. At that point, the only person in the world that he actually trusted was Eileen, but even then he needed her constant verbal reassurance to keep him afloat. A break in their trust would send Crow into a really bad place. By that time, he was so violent and volatile that he had a horrible reputation among hunters, which he actually relished in. He didn’t trust anyone, and tended to think they were all lying to him or trying to trick him if they tried to connect.
His manic behavior, paranoid suspicions, sarcastic/snarky way of relating, and easily sparked anger were all problems that kept him from being able to really relate to anyone normally. Eileen was an exception, but that remaining isolation only made things worse, and I think it’s safe to say that this older Crow tended to feel a lot of hatred and fear towards humanity in general.
But deep down, there was of course that longing to feel accepted and to belong to the world others inhabited. It was just too late for that in his eyes, or at least, he came to believe that at a critical point in his development. The heartless and naive people in the world around him never reached out to help either. Eileen was the only one that truly tried without holding back because she wasn’t afraid of him or how he had changed, but a few key misunderstandings/mistakes birthed some rifts between them.
Finally, and I hate to say this, but Vileblood Crow was sort of the seal to all of these problems. The Bloody Crow of Cainhurst wasn’t really human anymore, and had been “cured” of these aforementioned “flaws” in a sort of…inverted and twisted way. At that point, even Eileen couldn’t help him, and Bloody Crow’s dedication to Annalise ruined whatever chance he had of truly healing.
Annalise’s philosophy was to embrace every flaw in one’s person, to bury every weakness, and to become reborn as a “perfected” and stronger version of one’s self. When Crow decided to heed this and give into his darker ego, he lost his humanity. That’s what becoming a Vileblood was for him, which meant that there were no more peaceful interactions between him and anyone besides his Vileblood queen, really. He only had his mission and his revenge.
Yes, this is essentially the extremely dark and depressing story I came up with for him and I still feel really emotional over it lmao. Why the hell did I deliberately upset myself like this.
*clears throat*
ANYWAY.
Cutting here for space—
(8) Agh, he has so many headcanon connections for me!!
Eileen is the obvious one that may very well be canon, but…in my eyes, she totally raised him through the latter half of his childhood, and was going to pass her mantle to him eventually. Their relationship? Oh, it was super important.
Lady Maria is the other one I obsess over, but yes, I totally think she was his older sister and that they were the lost children of Cainhurst. Their relationship got complex as hell when they were older, and I don’t wanna say that Maria’s suicide was the worst timed thing ever, but yeah it was the worst timed thing ever lmao.
Annalise!! This one is also probably canon, but basically Crow was Annalise’s last knight until the Good Hunter took his place. Annalise and Crow were childhood companions who reunited as adults, and Annalise basically encouraged Crow to become what he turned into later. He hated the idea of becoming a Vileblood, but desperation drove him there and his love for Annalise gave him the desire to fight in her name, albeit with the freedom to choose otherwise if he wished.
She honored this and they made a pact, vowing to respect each other’s choices and wills at all times. This was entirely because of their affection for one another, but they also never let that affection control them. It didn’t lead to any sort of actual relationship. They would never compromise their values and duties for that. So, Crow fought for Annalise, and freely received her blood in return, while she received the offerings from him, but that was all. There was also a long period of time where they were separated and Annalise thought Crow was dead, but that’s for another complicated reason lol.
Vileblood Leo! Ok, this one I don’t wanna say too much, because it’s a bit of a surprise, but Leo IS an important character to me, and basically he was a childhood friend of Crow’s. They also reunited as adults and Some Very Dramatic Things happened. Not all good things either.
Logarius was like…one of Crow’s worst enemies and that became a serious issue around the time of the Cainhurst massacre, as you might imagine. All of the surviving Executioners would suffer for Crow’s hatred for Logarius, let me tell you that.
That includes Alfred, haha. I totally think Crow detested Alfred and often toyed with him just out of pure malice. When Alfred made the final move and snapped, killing Annalise…Crow went ballistic and marked him as a key target.
Crow knew the Gascoigne family because of Eileen, but only peripherally. In my headcanon, he left them alone until Henryk and Gascoigne were kind of some of the only sane hunters left in Yharnam, and by that point, Crow had been drawn into a game of cat and mouse with Eileen. So, that’s why I headcanon he murdered Viola to send Gascoigne and Henryk mad. It would draw out Eileen.
Arianna was someone Crow protected on behalf of Annalise and distantly provided aid to out of duty and loyalty. Arianna didn’t really know anything about him, but when she was young, she would often say she had a black-winged guardian angel looking out for her. Crow hated the potential shame of being thought of as some benevolent protector and withdrew when Arianna was a certain age. He knew he had failed her when she ended up in a rough financial position, but in the end, he decided that all that mattered was that she was alive. It was better than her developing some undeserved attachment to him.
Crow did have some connections to Gehrman, Ludwig, and the hunters through Maria at one point, but it didn’t last…and ultimately the hunters of the church became Crow’s biggest targets.
The one that’s really in development for me now is Crow’s connection and thoughts on the Doll. I do believe he dreamt at one point, and when he saw the Doll…who obviously came after Maria’s death, I can only imagine that screwed with his mind. Especially if they were brother and sister. Good Lord.
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Ok, whew. That was long. But thank you for giving me the chance to ramble about my boy, Fantomette! I needed that. It reminded me that I gotta keep writing my fic, because I have been a bit sluggish with it lately. This story has gotta get out of me somehow <3
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