thejesterjournal

[thejesterjournal]

Post X: A Semester of Poetry

Honestly, I wish this class was longer. I learned so much in just these few months and I was able to see myself progress in real time. Being able to write in different styles of poetry has kept me engaged and inspired. Seeing my poetry growth from last semester’s Intro to Creative Writing course to now has made me realize that I am a good writer and I will continue to be one. I decided to experiment and get fancy with my topics and writing style, and they tended to work well. I had such a fun time reading the poetry of my peers and seeing how they adapted their writing styles to the type of poem.

What I enjoyed most about this course was reading other poetry. The word substitution exercises were great with helping me get comfortable with exploring the different styles of poetry. Reading the works of other poets and analyzing their style has helped me develop my own. I now have an obsession with Kaveh Akbar and his poetry. Being able to see why a poet writes the way they do helps with determine why you write the way you do. I broke the line here because it does this like in that poem or I didn’t use punctuation because I wanted it to have the same effect as this poem. These kinds of thoughts appear only when you have more than a surface-level knowledge of poetry or yourself.

What I learned from this class is that poets have to know themselves. You have to know what your brand is, what audience you want to cater to, and what motivates you to write. Sure, inspiration can come from here and there, but why do you write? Why is this poem important to you? What do you gain from this? These are questions poets must answer. But, it’s okay to answer with an “I don’t know” and keep going. Sometimes, I don’t know what possessed me to write a poem, but I know that there’s a part of me that was itching to get those thoughts out.

Overall, I love poetry. I want to get an M.F.A. in Poetry and learn all that I can about it. This course has helped me understand myself as a poet better and has just thrown gasoline on the fire of my passion for writing. I wish all my peers the best and hope to see their works inspiring others just as they’ve inspired me.

Thank you,

The Jester

[thejesterjournal]

Post IX: Submitting Publications

Prior to this blog, I had already created a submittable account. In one of my other classes, I had to create a publication notebook, and a few entries included poetry contests and open submissions. I've been poking around literary journals and magazines for a while, trying to find ones that I would like to submit to. Most are general and I submitted to some.

A few, however, came with guidelines that I didn't agree with. Of course, all journals and magazines want unpublished work. That's a given. However, some make it a rule that published work includes social media and I don't agree with that. If someone submits their poetry to a personal blog that has frequent followers, then yes, that's published work. But, if the poem is submitted to a site such as this or on a small Instagram page, I think it should be given the chance to appear in a real publication.

Other than that, most guidelines are the same: 12 point font, 1 poem per page, single spaced, and up to 5 or 10 poems total. Some journals want a simple bio, while others want a professional cover letter. It's good to keep in mind what publications want what. My publication notebook helps me keep track of differing guidelines and deadlines. When starting out, submit to as a many different journals or magazines as you can. Find what fits for you. Once you know what you want, you can begin going for specific publications.

Overall, tailor the experience to you. It's okay to be a little picky and not submit to a publication because of their guidelines or what they showcase. If it doesn't fit your brand, don't go for it. Start small and work your way up. Publishing is not meant to be an immediate success process. It takes time. What might accept you this year, could reject you the next. Just keep going and do what's best for you.

[thejesterjournal]

Post VIII: Sonnet and Haiku

After writing a Sonnet a second time, I can happily say that I don't enjoy writing them. They're definitely something I can explore if I want a challenge, but I wouldn't willingly write another Sonnet (unless I'm experimenting). However, I tried to let myself have fun with this one. The first time I wrote a Sonnet was just last semester, in my Intro to Creative Writing class. I went with just putting 10 syllables per line and tried my best to simply get through each line. It as, admittedly, not my best work.

For this Sonnet, I tried to challenge myself and write in Iambic Pentameter. I'm not sure if I accomplished this or not. I admit that I forgot the deadline, so I wrote both the sonnet and the Haiku in one night. My desktop had so many syllable tabs open, and I still wasn't convinced I was stressing them correctly. Either way, I made an attempt and I can always revisit it later (if I don't rip my hair out first).

Despite the rushed process, I liked how this poem turned out. I had a completely different theme in mind, but the words starting flowing and who was I to stop them? My subconscious mind wanted me to let something out, and I'm glad it took over. Sometimes poetry chooses to become personal, and that's okay. Feelings are weird. They get jumbled and stuck in our heart and mind, getting stuffed down further and jammed together the more we ignore their presence. When they see an opportunity to be let out, they will take it. Fortunately for me, these feelings had a goal in mind and articulated it very well.

Which brings me to my Haiku. I've said before and I'll say it again: I love Haikus. They're fun to write and experiment with. How much can you say in just three lines? Reveal the bare bones of your subject and see how relatable it is still. That's how I see Haikus and that's what I want to express when I write them. When I finished my Haiku, I wasn't satisfied with it. I thought it didn't quite capture what I wanted to say in my Sonnet, but I had no time to start over and just kept it.

However, I've changed my mind. Now that I've read it with a clear head, I understand it better. I understand myself better. The love portrayed in my Sonnet isn't great. You're not supposed to want that kind of love. It's all-consuming and suffocating. Is it an experience? Yes, but not one everyone should have. With Birdwatching, I wanted to portray a sort of outsider view of the lovers. A blue bird is peacefully living their life, a hawk is living theirs just fine, but swoops anyway. Was the hawk being greedy for eating this innocent bird or was it just trying to survive in a world they deem cruel?

Obviously, real hawks don't care about these kinds of things, but it's interesting to think about. What makes a hawk eat other birds? Are they malnourished or just bullies? Did they get sick of rodents? Are the other birds just that easy to consume? We don't know and we don't really care, but a part of us is just curious enough to wonder.

[thejesterjournal]

Post VII: List Poem

The hardest part of writing a list poem is figuring out the title. When I first wrote mine, it was titled "Recipe for a dream." I wrote out my list and was satisfied with what I had. However, I decided to workshop it and let a few of my friends read it. They all liked the poem, but one of them didn't like the title. He said it didn't fit. I was confused at first and thought that maybe he didn't understand what I was trying to do. After a back and forth, he assured that he understood, but just didn't think the title was right for it. The title he suggested was "Nostalgia" but I argued that it was too on the nose and one-dimensional. He backed off, but I decided to go back and rework the poem anyway. 

I will reluctantly admit that he was right about the initial title not fitting. I feared that someone else would read it and not understand. I spent 30 minutes trying to come up with a new title, and I found myself getting frustrated. I took a break and came back with a clear head. I renamed it to "Things I saw on Ebay" both because I think it adds an extra layer to the poem and because I thought it was a little funny. You can't really find those things on Ebay, but there's something that makes you think you could.  

I really enjoyed writing this poem. I definitely want to write more of these. Thinking of things that are in no way related to each other, but can be if put in a different perspective is so interesting. What I think makes list poems so effective is that everything is connected in one way or another. "Radiohead lyrics" can easily be in the same category as "the entirety of 2015." You don't think about it usually, but there's a feeling there that makes you go "Oh yeah I can see that." 

Poetry in general should make you go "Yeah, I get it" or "Huh, I didn't see that before, but sure I can get behind that." If something is titled too tightly (Such as "Nostalgia") it takes away from those newer feelings. You see the list and go "oh, so this is just childhood?" and don't think about anything else. With a title that attracts and only hints, you drawn in the reader and allow them to make their own conclusions. That's what list poems are. You give a destination, but let the reader make their own directions to it.  

[thejesterjournal]

Post VI: Persona Poem

Making a persona poem was such a fun process. I often write poems inspired by characters, events, or storylines in the media I consume. So, to write one from the perspective of a character was easier than I thought. After some inner debates and practice poems, I decided to write a poem from the perspective of Shadow The Hedgehog. For those of you unfamiliar, his storyline is one of the saddest ones a fictional character could get. As a kid, he was one of my favorite game characters and I have continued to follow his story throughout the years. I've written a poem inspired by him before, so I was excited to write one from his perspective.

There are a lot of ways to write a persona poem. You can make it a commentary on social issues, a reinforcer of ideologies, a retelling of an event from that person's life or original source material, or a mix of all of those. I went with both a subtle allusion to the character's storyline and a reinforcer of an ideology. Now that I had the idea, I had to get into the character's head. Personally, I prefer to write Persona poems from the perspective of fictional characters since there's more flexibility and freedom for what you want to write. It's best to write a persona poem from a character that you know well. However, you can do it from scratch if you want a challenge.

Shadow the Hedgehog is a character I know well, so getting into his mindset was easy. After that, I let my fingers type as they pleased. I rewrote the poem twice before I was satisfied. It won't always happen like that, but I'm grateful it did this time. Previously, I wanted to write my persona poem about Ice King and Betty from Adventure Time, but it didn't turn out the way I wanted. I did like Betty's and I'll share it here after I revise it.

Overall, I really enjoyed doing this persona poem and I will definitely do more in the future. I personally like taking the fictional character route, but I also admire those who can write about real people. I really liked my classmates' poems. Honestly, huge shoutout to @appalatchn for his poem because I cannot imagine trying to imitate Homer's style of poetry. Anyway, long story short: Persona poems are great and I look forward to doing more.

(P.S. Check out this video about Shadow the Hedgehog, it does him justice)

[thejesterjournal]

Sorry for looking at you, I spaced out

This… feeling… this… fragility… It hurts.

Not like a burning. Not like an ache. A bold bash to the head. A quick slice to the heel. An anticipated blade to the spine.

Bend over backwards. The ribs protrude. Take one. The charcoal will soon be ash.

Something unfamiliar is in the veins. Stardust passes through. Cough. It's dusty in here.

The window is open. Wind carries rain. Polished rainboots melt away. A door slams and splinters. Where did this mud come from?

Smoke fills the lungs. Eyes burn. Who left the grill on? Go back to start.

[thejesterjournal]

Post V: Music and Rhythm

I like how poetry is described in terms of music. There's no music or vocal accompaniment, just the words on the page. However, you can use rhetorical devices to create a flow through the poem that requires the reader to read it in a specific way. I personally like utilizing Caesura in my poetry because I like to imitate hesitation or emphasize a double meaning within the line breaks. I've also played around with slant rhymes and refrains. The music in poetry comes from the feelings it invokes. What emotions or appeal to the senses do you want to make stand out the most when someone reads your poetry? What rhetorical devices will help you make your intent clear?

Something I did with a poem (that I would like to explore again) is mirror it. I basically had two poems in one but they were in different perspectives. The lines were the same and the language was similar, but by changing a few words I created a bigger picture. When I think about it in terms of music, it resembles that of a second verse featuring an added perspective to the song. There are no harmonizing voices or a change in melody, but you understand the meaning all the same.

Rhythm is important in this aspect. The pacing and pattern of the poem are like the instrumentals of a song. Without a good musical accompaniment, some songs fall short. Sure the vocals (words) are amazing and enjoyable, but that musical element is just missing that special something that would make it spectacular. With Rhythm, you form your own instrumentals and choose which sounds you want to emphasize. More guitar? (added stress on ending syllables) Less drums? (shorter lines) Do you want a subtle hint of piano? (repetition) It all depends on what you want to compose and how you want the end result to turn out.

Music and Rhythm in poetry aren't hard concepts. You are the songwriter, the conductor, the band manager, and the band wrapped in one. What matters first is how you want the poem to turn out. Then, you release your demo (first "perfected" draft) and based on how it was received, you send it on its way or you continue to tweak until it satisfies both you and your reader. And remember: You can always say "screw the reader" and do your own thing. This is your craft, sometimes poems can be for you and a select few.

Photo from Pinterest (https://www.pinterest.com/pin/1759287344776663/)

[thejesterjournal]

Post IV: Image and Metaphor

I enjoyed these chapters a lot. As someone who has been told that I use a lot of imagery in my writing (both in poetry and fiction), I was excited to learn more about how to use it more efficiently. I've always been a descriptive person, so it wasn't hard to make my poetry vivid. However, I do struggle with metaphor. I’m not sure how to use metaphors on purpose. Most, if not all, my poetry is written on a whim. I get an idea, start writing, and I end up with whatever comes to my head. I do use metaphors and accompany them with vivid imagery, but I have to admit that I don’t put much thought into it. I just go “this sounds nice” and write it down.

These chapters have helped me begin actively thinking about metaphor and how I can intertwine it with my imagery. They don’t have to be super straightforward or very subtle. It just has to fit into my image and appeal to the readers the way I want it to.

Photo from Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/53691420550857557/

[thejesterjournal]

To The Forest- Word Substitution Poem

if I crawl down

inside you

how strange to beg

for cold hands

haunting us

You're dying beside

a stream

but here i am

wild and hungry

i devour me

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Base Poem: To The Mountains by Eileen Myles

when I look out

at you

how absurd to think

of Diet Coke

killing me

I'm flying through

the air

and there you are

white and dangerous

who's kidding who

[thejesterjournal]

Post III: Word Substitution Poem

I think that word substitution poems are a great way to warm up when writing poetry. They allow you to explore different structures and types of language that you probably haven't used before. I especially love replication line breaks/form. I've always wondered how other poets decide to cut their lines and I can get a good idea of how to do it myself from replicating their styles. When you first start reading poetry, you don't really pay attention to syntax, diction, and punctuation. But, after getting used to analyze poetry, you start to become aware of it more and can apply what you've observed to your own poetry. You realize that line breaks do matter and that syntax, punctuation, and diction have an important role in poetry. The imagery you display and the feelings you invoke are all dependent on those. I think word substitution poems work great as a way to get used to analyzing poetry for how its written and seeing what does and doesn't work in a poem.

In the words of T.S. Eliot: "When forced to work within a strict framework, the imagination is taxed to its utmost--and will produce its richest ideas. Given total freedom, the work is likely to sprawl." Poetry writing is different for everyone. Some might find freewriting is better while others like to work within a certain structure. However, I agree with Eliot when he says that working in a strict framework invokes the imagination. When writing these poems, I found myself truly considering the endless possibilities of what I could write. Yes, I was limited to a certain structure and what types of words to use where, but I could've turned the base poem into anything. With this realization came a flow of ideas. I found one that I liked and kept going. I even managed to surprise myself with the direction I was going in them.

When you freewrite, you already have an idea in mind or you start writing until an idea comes out. Then, you have to decide the format your idea would be well-presented in. Sometimes, you have to constantly rewrite to find the words and structure that best satisfy you. With a word-substitution poem, you already have the structure, you just need the words. That also include rewriting, but you don't need to explore different formats, so it lessens the blow. I'm not saying that we should write poetry by just doing word-substitutions, but it is a good idea to occasionally make a framework for yourself when writing poetry.

Photo from: https://www.reddit.com/r/BooksThatFeelLikeThis/comments/17wtm71/dark_academia_nature/

[thejesterjournal]

Decay's Gift

The flesh is almost always first to go.  

Mother earth decides to claim our body;  

Her way of seeking rejuvenation.  

Bugs and fungi rush to claim what’s now theirs.  

Maggots eat away at remnants of flesh.  

Woodland critters snatch whatever’s been left.  

Bones and meat are stored for the harsh winter.  

All share a fate with this ravaged body.  

Soon, they too will rot and be turned to earth— 

Their bodies ripped apart by trusted peers. 

Nature claims all, the cycle continues 

A skull lays discarded in the dim woods. 

Mushrooms grow and thrive in an eye socket. 

New life continues from decay and rot 

[thejesterjournal]

Post II- An Introduction to Poetry

This section in the textbook actually opened my eyes to what it means to be a writer. I've always seen talent as something you immediately have. You either got it or you don't. But, after reading this section, I realized that I do have a talent for poetry. I have the courage and willingness to experiment with whatever thought comes in my head. I write what I want. Talent is not another word for "prodigy." It's something that is carefully cultivated and practiced until it becomes second nature. We are quick to say "that person has a real talent" when someone commits a feat that we don't. But that takes away from the hard work and determination that goes into executing that feat. I can say, I have a talent for poetry and be truthful because I put everything I have into each word I write, each line I start, and each stanza I finish.

This brings me to the meaning of my poems. Two things mentioned in this section stand out to me:

Sometimes, meaning is secondary

The writer doesn't always have to think about meaning.

A friend (who I have no doubt stalks this page) recently told me that my poetry was depressing. Was she wrong? No. It is depressing. But, that doesn't mean I aim to make the reader depressed. In fact, when writing my poems I felt pretty hopeful. I wrote a poem about a body decaying in the woods. I can admit that would probably depress anyone. However, the end of the poem is about new life growing from that decayed body. Death makes way for new life. It's not so depressing anymore, is it? If you still say yes, I can't argue with that. I based the poem off a tapestry I have hanging in my room. (The tapestry is featured at the end of this post). My mother called it creepy so I felt the need to defend it. Turning the tapestry into something beautiful was my goal, and the meaning just happened to follow. I wasn't entirely sure what I wanted it to mean until I was putting the words on paper (and even then someone can find a meaning that I didn't notice before).

Another poem I wrote was based off a grave I came across while exploring a graveyard. The woman was the same age as me (21) when she died and it made me realize how vulnerable I truly was. I made a poem speculating about her life and who she was. When writing it, I didn't think about the meaning I wanted to portray. I wrote it as a one-sided conversation—asking questions I knew I wouldn't receive an answer for. The poem ends with her ghost comforting me and wishing me luck on my journey. I'm still not entirely sure what the poem means, but I know there are feelings in there that are relatable. Fears and concerns hidden in the subtext, revealed to those who look a little deeper. I didn't need to make the meaning obvious or write to portray a theme or lesson. I just needed to write. Sometimes, we take ourselves too seriously and try to find the meaning of a poem before writing the content. That can work, yes, but I think we should let ourselves freely write and see what we can create.

Which then brings me to what I think it means to be a poet. All I have to say is this: To be a poet means to be poetry. I am a canvas and life is my artist. My body is a pen and my experiences are paper. I am a body decaying in the woods and my readers are the plants growing from my remains.

[thejesterjournal]

Post I: Introduction

Welcome readers! This is mostly for class, but if any stragglers make it to this page, feel free to stay! Poetry has become a huge part of my life, and I'm excited to explore it more. As it stands now, poetry (to me) is an exploration of the human experience. You see the writer's hopes, fears, and dreams reflected in their words. Their innermost thoughts are displayed for all to see, yet there is a tacit understanding between reader and poet. You may not know the writer's muse or inspiration, but you know the feelings presented in their work. Older poets, such as Walt Whitman, explore a wide range of philosophical and metaphorical beliefs. Meanwhile contemporary poets, such as Alleliah Nuguid, write in a more abstract way. Both poets can be understood by a person. Poetry cannot be confined to a single classification. It's a connection between people—an intimate understanding of the human mind and the world's influences. You can read a poem by a Chinese author (like Yu Xiuhua) and understand it just as well as you could a poem by an American author. Social and Cultural barriers do not exist, because we are all human—and therefore poetry. We exist, we experience, and we understand.

Photo from: https://www.theotheraesthetic.com/blog/dark-academia-room-ideas/