thirteenthdoor

[thirteenthdoor]

what is the spirealm about? its on my watchlist but I have like. 6% of an idea for what it is akhfkfjsj

you know i was all set to fulminate for like an hour about this and all the things i adore about it. then i realized: wait, not only do *i* have a little post already, but so does @thirteenthdoor! thus i give you:

my silly post:

thirteenthdoor's much more comprehensive/organized post:

AND BONUS: 13th also telling you why you should read kaleidoscope of death, with which i 800% agree. i stopped watching spirealm like halfway through so i could shotgun KOD in four days, and i highly recommend this experience. caveat: book is scarier than drama, which is just sort of mildly creepy in spots. do not read KOD after dark, unless you are the kind of person who does that kind of thing.

[thirteenthdoor]

[thirteenthdoor]

I figured you might notice i have a kaleidoscope of death hyperfixation

I am doing art therapy with it 🥴 I love ruan nanzhu. I might post my feelings abt that one arc later today, as I'll translate it

BTW THE RIGHT CORNER IS LIKE: LYING TO ANYONE 😈 vs LYING TO LINGLING🥺

[thirteenthdoor]

the new lin belcher

[thirteenthdoor]

Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Lin Qiushi | Ling Jiushi/Ruan Nanzhu | Ruan Lanzhu Characters: Lin Qiushi | Ling Jiushi, Ruan Nanzhu | Ruan Lanzhu Additional Tags: mention of past character death, Full Series Spoilers, I am not kidding about spoilers it's spoilers all the way down, This is also much filthier than I usually go but what can I say the times make the man, Ruan Nanzhu has normal feelings and he feels them a normal amount, Lin Qiushi's just vibing though man honestly it's the best thing about him 

Summary: Ruan Nanzhu felt a bit like a dog who had finally caught the car.

Hey, friends! My buddy @riverbankstalk just posted an incredibly romantic and incredibly sexy fic, so you should go check it out! And give her kudos! Because man, it’s hot. If you want to read about those boys’ first-time hookup and about Ruan Nanzhu being just super-duper normal about everything, do not delay, click that link!

[thirteenthdoor]

Thanks to my buddy @riverbankstalk, I am pleased to present the (probably) complete and (absolutely) definitive list of Ruan Nanzhu's outfits in the Spirealm, ranked in order from least to most vampire. These rankings are scientifically determined and objectively verifiable. You are welcome for this comprehensive categorization.

A wide-striped shirt with a dorky neckline over a turtleneck? Nanzhu at his least vampire and his most rugby. Thank goodness he only wears this for a single scene. 0/10

This is a great place to note that these outfits are not ranked for how much we like them; they are ranked for how vampire they are. His charming New Year's outfit is way too charming to be vampire. Its sole vampire point comes from the bugfuck weird shirt, which will be seen again later anyway. 1/10

The underlying components will be seen and judged in later iterations. But would a vampire wear this coat? Listen: no. 2/10

The dork-ass zero-vampire outfit is improved slightly with a coat, so I guess we're at Zero Vampire Thirty or something. Huge irony that he shows up in one of his least vampire outfits for the scene with canonical neck-biting. 2/10

Picking up the pace a little, but he still looks less like a vampire and more like a trendy wallpaper roll. 3/10

It's not so much that a vampire would wear this shirt as it is that it's hard to imagine a non-vampire wearing it. Put a coat over it to make it a normal meet-the-in-laws look. That's the ticket. We're being so normal right now. 3/10

This full outfit will be seen again later, and in fact ranked very highly, so it's got that going for it. But when you take off the outer coat and just keep the long felt vest, you wind up looking like a kindergarden teacher in a smock on finger paint day. 3/10

The Matrix is not about vampires. 3/10

This is about the time in the story when Ruan Nanzhu starts letting his guard down and dressing less like he could professionally assassinate someone, which is not conducive to a high vampire score. There's that shirt again, making double sure his collarbone doesn't go anywhere. 4/10

This basic white-shirt-black-pants combo will later be made more vampire by accessorizing. But as it is, it's pretty basic. Standard background vampire. The extra at all the vampire parties. 4/10

I picked this shot because it's one of the few where you can see he's wearing suspenders under there. Boy Vampire Detective, gonna solve the neighborhood vampire crimes. 4/10

Honestly, I think this slightly injured, rolled-sleeve look might have scored more vampire if his hair didn't look so dopey. Fix your hair, Nanzhu. You're never going to get any respect in the vampire club like that. 5/10

There, see? You do his hair, you trade the jacket for a vest, and boom! Two more vampire than he was before! Now he's cyberpunk businessman vampire -- a little muddled, but still vampire. 7/10

Of course Baijie's initial outfit is giving vampire. The problem is, it's giving a whole lot of other things too, like the katana and the way he carries his skirts up the stairs like a princess. Besides, even the neatest-eating vampires would never wear that much white. 7/10

Pure Kentucky fried vampire. Vampire in a southern gothic romance. Vampire who mixes a little blood into his mint julep. The single black button on the sleeves absolutely sends me every time. 7/10

I don't know how to convey to you the absolute bonkers nature of this outfit. It doesn't look normal, but at first glance it looks almost like regular clothes. But then you notice the too-large shirt, weird white strings hanging off the sides, frayed cuffs, white paint on the right sleeve that honestly looks like dogshit, and separate little butt-cape beneath the coat that clips to his belt loops. I picked this picture because it's about the best look you get at the butt-cape in action. He is clearly dressing to impress with something he thinks is on the cutting edge of fashion, but 90% of people will just think he looks like he's lost his mind. Better hope that the lore about vampires untying knots isn't true, or that jacket's going to be quite a destraction. 7/10

The Boy Detective has advanced to Hotel Detective. Half of that coat is longer than the other half, and it's a testament to how gripping the Hako Onna arc is that you might not even notice. 7/10

Whether with or without the longish jacket, this is classic vampire. Meat-and-potatoes vampire look. Solid, workaday, standard vampire -- except for how there's the faintest sliver of a cravat peeking out from underneath that wide collar. He is a ridiculous man and, in this outfit, a ridiculous vampire. 8/10

In fact, the only way you could make that last outfit more vampire would be to add what's basically a black dressing-gown over it. Which is exactly what he's done here. 8.5/10

Put that sad boy in sunlight. Watch him sparkle. 9/10

There's a lot more going on with the Sako door outfit, but what really makes this vampire is how he's got three lapels. Behold: the Business Vampire. 9.5/10

I'm going to walk you through this outfit: a black turtleneck, a black button-down oxford shirt, a sleeveless knee-length grey felt vest, and a darker grey loose wool coat over it. It is the vampire ideal. No longer a preschool art instructor, he has leveled up with the final layer. He even has the turtleneck like he's trying to cover up a suspicious neck wound. Of course this is the outfit he's wearing in the last scene, when he's at his most immortal. This outfit made Wu Xi gay. This outfit will make you gay. Ultimate consumptive poet vampire rizz. Lord Byron could never. 10/10

Bonus: Absolute vampire queen. Kiss me, my bitchy beauty with the terrible wig. 100/10

[thirteenthdoor]

music: Lorde - Buzzcut Season footage: the Spirealm

SPOILERS, THERE'S SPOILERS HERE, HUGE SPOILERS ALL THE WAY TO THE NEXT-TO-LAST EPISODE

Anyway, now that you have been sufficiently warned, please enjoy my continued ridiculous video stylings as I cut together four heartbreaking minutes of footage of Best Girl Tan Zaozao

[thirteenthdoor]

The Spirealm says MLM pride

[thirteenthdoor]

The Spirealm BTS

[thirteenthdoor]

ruan baijie cosplay by 沫宸 mo chen on douyin

[thirteenthdoor]

Get yourself a man who looks this good while quoting Marx.

[thirteenthdoor]

Like the actual grownup I am, I spent way too long learning how to stitch gay-ass c-drama clips together over a song I loved in college. Careful, or I'll do it again.

(Spoiler warnings for one of the major reveals in the Spirealm, so maybe go watch that first!)

[thirteenthdoor]

The Spirealm BTS

[thirteenthdoor]

I find it so funny that Nanzhu, despite his terrible temper, is gathering a whole bunch of men that all desire him carnally.

And he's very aware of his own charm:

Do you see it? Do you see the pure lust emanating from the eyes of the guy from the 10th Door??

But he's the one getting all "hatred and condemn" look when Qiushi gets all the girls and the crazy ones (including Nanzhu himself) with the power of being a traumatized good boi with a secret dark side

They're both incredible

[thirteenthdoor]

The Spirealm BTS

[thirteenthdoor]

Chen Fei exists on a spectrum of "going through it" to "absolutely done with it."

[thirteenthdoor]

Happy Pride from your friends at Obsidian!