twig-tea

[twig-tea]

Oppan special episode trailer

That Oppan returns with a special episode! Makoto: My guardian deity... The storyteller is none other than the beloved family dog, Carlos! Carlos: Hello, I'm the master of this house. Makoto: I'll catch the culprit that broke the tanuki. Please believe in Carlos's nose and my legs. Carlos by his side, Makoto hunts for the culprit that broke the guardian deity of the Okita family. In the midst of all that, he encounters a rigid, narrow-minded father just like his former self. New guy: There's no way a working family man can handle taking care of a pet. Makoto's best friend Daichi also encounters new problems!? Madoka: The aquarium back home is short-staffed. Daichi: So you're going to Kyuushuu...? Can a Shouwa-era old man, now updated with Reiwa-era values, really solve everyone's problems? Carlos: A walk. A walk. A walk.

The special is scheduled to air on June 28. Subs will be made available on my blog.

[twig-tea]

"The ocean is for contemplating things bigger than we are, and helping us to feel humble. And the beach is a place for raw honesty." - @twig-tea

For @twig-tea 💙

[twig-tea]

THE J-BL DROUGHT IS OVER!

The kings are back june 13th with SIX episodes!

They might be in a lovey-dovey state, but in the sequel, there is a “thorny and painful road” that seems set to test their love…

The first season is available on gaga and I cannot recommend it enough!

[twig-tea]

Ben’s Big BL Blurb 7: BL Is Over Its Piners

It’s been quite a while since I wrote one of these. I’ve been watching a lot less, but I wanted to jump back in and meditate on the state of pining in BL, and also comment on how things haven’t felt this sparse in BL since maybe 2019 for me. 

I’ve noticed in some of the shows I’ll discuss below that piners are no longer universally lauded for the purity or sanctity of their one-sided crushes or obsessions, and instead have been confronted or challenged by the narrative. This is a fascinating (and honestly necessarily) evolution for the genre. Let’s get into it, in no particular order…starting with the worst.

Something’s Not Right is Appropriately Named

Adapted from the same source material as Blueming (2022), this show follows stressed piner Do Ba Woo and his crush on his childhood friend Ji Hoon. Ba Woo is at his wit’s end with the vivacious Ji Hoon and wants to end their friendship. Ji Hoon, responding as any man would to their best friend suddenly wanting to sever ties, ignores this and wonders what might be wrong. 

Meanwhile, interloper Jung Ha Min discovers Ba Woo’s diary and misunderstands it as a novel. He pesters Ba Woo into finishing the novel so he can use it for a webtoon, and encourages Ba Woo to ask Ji Hoon out for a week. When Ji Hoon surprisingly agrees, Ba Woo goes on to torment this confused man for a week with hot and cold behavior, rejecting Ji Hoon’s own confessions, and facing no realization about his own role in his misery before the story retcons the drama by saying Ji Hoon was withholding his own feelings the whole time.

Final Verdict: 4, Not Recommended. Friends, this show is a mess that also apparently erased its original supporting cast (@lurkingshan and @ahxiang). It fails to understand that Ba Woo is the problem here in that he’s constantly confusing Ji Hoon and treating him cruelly. It fails as a romance for me because I didn’t even want the guys to be friends by the end, and spent most of the show baffled by the apparent determination to make Ba Woo vibe with Ha Min. I also deeply-resent the show retconning Ji Hoon in the final episode by having him have also been nursing an older crush. At no point does Ba Woo grow from any of the events he’s encountered to reckon with the fact that he’s the one causing all of their problems. This was an unusually frustrating viewing experience that I do not recommend. 

While I do think this show wanted to tackle the intensity of unrequited feelings, I don’t think it did right by Ji Hoon at all. This show completely misses the mark on saying or doing anything interesting with one-sided pining and its impacts on both and related parties. Ba Woo was a rude, misanthropic friend, and this show was more concerned with Jung Ha Min developing his own unrequited crush than the believability of the romantic connection between its leads. ONE CHOP.

Business as Usual Should Have Remembered that Our Dating Sim Exists

I’ve been thinking about how elegantly Our Dating Sim incorporated the game development work into the second chance romance after finishing Business as Usual. Business worsens the conflict by having the guys be actively dating and FUCKING as our mad piner, Kim Min Joon, severs ties with Jin Hwan over a misunderstanding. Min Joon essentially stagnates for  eight years before Jin Hwan joins the same company. Jin Hwan is clearly still interested in Min Joon, and we eventually learn that Min Joon badly misunderstood a call he overheard and ghosted his boyfriend for no valid reason. 

My primary difficulty with this show is that it doesn’t want to spend time on the work Min Joon needs to do to earn its wedding epilogue. We recently finished the Theory of Love Romcom Rewatch, and this is something I’ve been thinking about a lot in the wake of dealing with Third again (probably helped by the uncanny resemblance between Chae Jong Hyeok and Gun Atthaphan). Compare this to Our Dating Sim, in which Lee Wan came face-to-face with the separation anxiety Shin Ki Tae developed after being ghosted, Min Joon mostly faces one tough conversation with a mutual friend that inspires Min Joon to do a dramatic run to the airport to say that, despite their differences, he wants to commit. I didn’t buy it.

Final Verdict: 5, Rewatch Our Dating Sim instead. I will grant this show that it did seem to understand that Min Joon was the major problem here, but it doesn’t know what he needs to do to make things right between them. I also want to give this show credit for letting the men have sex even though they hadn’t solved all of the problems between them. However, they failed to use their dating advice book conceit to help with the arc of the relationship at all, nor did they address the way Min Joon’s avoidant behavior led to him also being a bad supervisor. I generally struggle with second chance romances like this where the wrong party doesn’t go on a growth arc and face the reality that they hurt the person they loved. TWO CHOPS.

Gelboys Finally Gave Me Another Thai BL Built Around Internal Drama

I’ve been sitting on what I want to say about Gelboys for quite a while now due to my frustrations with the fast happy ending for both couples. While I don’t think that was wholly earned, I do want to praise this show for making the boys’ affection/obsession with each other the primary source of drama and driver of the narrative. Too often, I find that Thai BL relies on external sources of tension or romantic obstacles rather than face the fundamental personality issues that make the relationship difficult or impossible. 

In Gelboys, we have a quartet of boys who like someone in the group in a way that the other can’t or refuses to reciprocate. Fou4Mod wants someone (notably Chian) to choose him fully. Chian wants to be with Bua, and wants to use Fou4Mod to make Bua jealous. Baabin wants to be with Fou4Mod, but won’t confess. Bua eventually wants to be with Baabin, but Baabin won’t let go of his crush on Fou4Mod. They all end up making each other miserable. 

Friends, the misery of this show was delectable in a way that felt fresh after this creative team’s last major BL outing of I Told Sunset About You. It was interesting to see them completely avoid the conversation around sexuality in this show in favor of a focus on trains and youth freedom to play at malls to focus on how young people use internet tools to torment themselves and each other. I remember vividly the social moors of the MySpace top 8 friends feature, and I was obsessed with the way the kids used the Close Friends feature of Instagram to carefully show off information to their crushes. I was also deeply mortified by Chian asking ChatGPT for relationship advice, and Fou4Mod using a generative AI to make a fake makeout video. The digital landscape is dark!

On the pining front, each of these boys is such an asshole about the boy they’re pining over. Chian wants Bua, and is cruel to Fou4Mod for it. Baabin essentially ends his own friendship with Fou4Mod rather than confess properly. Bua finally pursued Baabin properly, and is the only one to properly apologize for the pain he inflicted on another over the course of this. This show was plain about how withholding feelings and using people’s feelings against them led to such cruel outcomes. Unfortunately, it rushed a happy ending that soured my taste at the end. 

Final Verdict: 9, Highly Recommended. This show is for those people who want to see what youth urban romance feels like in the modern era. There are so many ideas about how consumption plays into dating and flirting, particularly around the way the boys chose to have their nails painted (or not painted). It was really something special to have a show where what the characters wanted was the source of all of their issues, rather than an interloper inflicting contrived drama on the pair. In a year where I can’t seem to finish a Thai BL, this is a bright spot. 

Heesu in Class 2 Understood Unrequited Love

Heesu in Class 2 explores the impacts of two queer boys having unrequited crushes, and why these boys have avoided confessing. Of all the shows about boys I watched in recent months, this one felt the most queer to me. This was such a visceral experience for many readers who were able to appreciate the role of Heesu’s sisters (@soypim), the way admissions like Heesu’s will forever change your dynamic (@nabi-unveiled), the ways this show grappled with one-sided love (@wanderlust-in-my-soul), and how shows like this remind us why we seek out queer media (@watchingblsnowandforever).

While we had disagreement about whether this show’s divergence from the source material was worthy, I still think we got a great drama out of this AND I think viewers who want to see Heesu and Seungwon’s dating era should read the webtoon; I don’t think it’s a one or the other situation here. The webtoon is well-intentioned, and I think it’s a worthwhile read for people curious about how a simple narrative can be expanded into a full drama.

Final Verdict: 10, Don’t Miss This One. More than anything, I want to praise everyone involved with making this show. I loved the way they navigated turning this webtoon into a gay kdrama, and I hope the delays in releasing this don’t spell an end for this type of approach from Korea. I especially want to praise Ahn Ji Ho for his stellar performance as Hee Su. I loved this show immensely, and it’s currently my favorite of the year. This show is going to feel different from what romance viewers of BL content are used to, but it’s a really special show that tells you what it’s about and then delivers on it.

Fragrance of the First Flower Season 2

I am so glad we were able to return to these two after so many years. I’ve been struggling with the global state of GL, and this is the only bright spot I had this year. I loved seeing these two try again after their breakup. Yi Ming was able to divorce her husband, but she’s still working through so much to figure out if she can have a proper relationship with Ting Ting. I also loved the way this show used its second lead as a way to further Ting Ting’s steadfast devotion to her relationship while still respecting the feelings of a friend. Some of the boys above could have used that lesson. 

Final Verdict: 9, Highly Recommended. Seriously, just go watch it. We don’t get enough good lesbian shows, and this one cares a lot about lesbian realities while still managing to be kind to the characters and the viewers. 

Fellow Travelers Has Me Back in America (6/8)

I wasn’t kidding after Heesu when I said it might be time for me to stop identifying so much with BL and return to my roots. This show follows the lives of four queer characters and their families starting in the McCarthy era of government employment into the AIDS crisis of the 1980s. It explores the validity of queer love and the difficult realities about pursuing them across more than 30 years. Anchored by absolutely stellar performances from the entire cast, it is my biggest queer obsession right now. 

I originally avoided Fellow Travelers because it was a Showtime exclusive and, while I love Matt Bomer and Jonathan Bailey, I wasn’t in the mood for white gays surviving the McCarthy era. Unfortunately for this show, the fans making fan content about this show failed to highlight that there’s an interesting Black couple in this show that are also exploring issues around race and gender in queer relationships. I also didn’t know that the series takes place in the 1980s as well.

What I have found so compelling about this show is how much information we have about where everyone is. We know who is alive in the AIDS crisis of the 80s. We know who chooses to marry into heteronormativity and who doesn’t. We learn who knows about who. This makes our time in the past far more compelling because now you’re paying attention to how people end up where they are not if they’ll even survive. I just finished an episode involving the son of a gay man and I am compelled to continue.

2 Husbands 1 Wife is Actually a Poly Show (5/10)

Featuring Asaka Kodai of Cherry Magic’s Tsuge, this show explores an attempt at a three-person marriage involving Yanaguchi Mia, Satomura Shinpei, and Mitsuda Takuzo. Mia, an office worker, wants to marry Shinpei, a dancer. However, Shinpei doesn’t think the two of them are big enough adults to make a marriage work, and so he proposes adding a third person to help them. After attending the funeral for Takuzo’s (and at one time Mia’s) rabbit, Shinpei proposes they approach Takuzo (who is Mia’s ex) to be part of their trio. Initially hesitant, the three are going closer during their trial period. 

What’s so compelling for me about this one is how seriously the show is taking the potential around sex, public appearances, affection and jealousy within the trio, and family management. As of episode 5 and the preview for 6, we’re even exploring Mia having to reckon with the fact that the two husbands will inevitably have a relationship with each other as well, following the fact that Shinpei was clear to Takuzo that they will be husbands as far as he’s concerned. This show has managed to accomplish so much in its 20-minute episodes, and I find myself eager to watch it on Thursday evenings on my nicest TV.

Top Form is as Sappy as Its Source Material (8/11)

I haven’t written about this one, mostly because I remember watching Dakaiichi years ago. While I have my own qualms about the changes the Thai show has made, especially when it comes to the timeline, I honestly think I’m just not enjoying the sappiness of the project this time around. That is not the fault of this show, which is actually accurately capturing how sappy Dakaiichi was. I was also turned off by their decision to basically adapt the assault storyline exactly as the original. Mostly, I’ve struggled with the sex for love politics of the Thai version in a way that I think has weakened the original Japanese narrative. It’s a personal issue I’m having, and I think if you’re curious about the show, you should check it out.

Dropped Shows

Look, I just can’t do it anymore. If the show doesn’t hit, I’m letting it go. GMMTV is the biggest loser here. Since the last blurb I’ve dropped:

My Golden Blood (1/12) - It’s not sexy enough, and the chemistry is deeply lacking.

Ossan’s Love Thailand (8/12) - It started to offend me, so I dropped it.

Break Up Service (3/12) - Off is good. The show is not.

Sweet Tooth, Good Dentist (1/12) - How could they do this to Mark Pakin?

The Bangkok Boy (1/12) - I want an action BL. This isn’t hitting.

The Boy Next World (9/10) - Things went stupid, so it got dropped.

Boys In Love (1/12) - This kind of saccharine isn’t hitting for me right now.

The Age of Pining is Over. Now is the Time For Earnestness

The biggest thing I’m thinking about right now is how many shows engaged with the negative side of unrequited pining this year. As a Known Piner, I am all for this. All piners must understand that they must face the mortifying ordeal of being known if they want to experience the benefits of being loved. It’s also important that we grapple with how withholding our feelings from the people we love leads to confusion, resentment, and possessiveness. I’m thankful that in Heesu in Class 2 we got to see all the contexts of why queer people would withhold those feelings and how it hurts everyone, and I’m glad Gelboys was willing to be so visceral about the ways young people love and hurt each other in the digital age. I’m curious what comes out of the other side of this if we start to see something more earnest. Perhaps we’ll get something as heartfelt and beautiful as When Life Gives You Tangerines.

But also...seriously...where is Japan? It hasn't felt this dire in almost 6 years.

[twig-tea]

The many faces of one-sidedness

I love Heesu in Class 2. But before I delight you with my own opinion on the series, let me tell you that I haven't read the manhwa and am only referring to the series here and perhaps a little discourse on expectations and the shift in the viewership of bl series will follow. I just know I can't write meta without digress.

During the broadcast of the series, I noticed how divided opinions were. While some were crying after the original source and didn't even want to give the series a chance, on the other hand there was a debate about whether it was a good bl series or not and what it should be. I don't understand why adaptations can't be seen as a medium in their own right. While the manhwa forms the basic framework on which the story is built, the adaptation is perfectly allowed to go its own way and use its own motifs, build its own storylines that fit better with a filmed story. An adaptation is still its own story with its own story being told, because a one-to-one transfer will mostly never work. @bengiyo wrote a fantastic meta about it! And if you want to read why Heesu in Class 2 is a lovely queer kdrama, go and check out @lurkingshan and her breakdown of the whole story. But well, I already digress.

Heesu in Class 2 was such a good story about the different ways and difficulties to have a one-sided crush. Take Heesin, for example. Heesin feels like she falls in love with men every other day and always confesses it immediately. According to her logic, you can only get over a crush if you confess. This makes her life both very simple and very complicated. She contributes to the daily, loving chaos in the Lee family. She suffers and loves with all her heart. And it seems like it's no big deal to confess that you like your crush. She seems like the opposite of Heesu, whose queerness doesn't allow him to love and suffer so carefree. He suffers quietly without confiding in anyone, while Heesin can celebrate her heartbreak without expecting anything but pity.

Heejeong is the responsible one. The one who gives up her dreams and her love because of fear. Sometimes loving means daring. You jump into something uncertain and make yourself vulnerable in front of another person. Heejeong wanted to study overseas with her boyfriend, but she got cold feet and lost out on an uncertain future. Instead, she lives her 9-5 everyday life with her siblings, in which nothing really exciting happens. And it doesn't have to be to lead a fulfilling life. But she is not happy. She is still hanging on to her dream and she should be able to at least try to live it or live the life she has dreamed of.

Fear can be a major obstacle. Heesu gives her the advice to do what she wants to do. As the most responsible character in the household, portrayed as the most grown-up, she has so far taken on the role of the parents and moved further and further away from her dream self. She has kept a part of her personality, of her self and her past a secret from her siblings. In the end, she realised that this is her life, which she can only shape on her own. She is the architect of her own happiness. Her unrequited love is not even so much for her ex-partner, who she still sees and who is still a big part of her life, but rather with her missed self that she has always dreamed of having. She has spoken out and faced her fear. She wants to be happy for her own sake and to do this she has to overcome her fear and find herself.

Heejae. For me, Heejae epitomises what it's like when the boundaries between romantic love and friendship become blurred and you're caught in a world in between. Being in love with your best friend is one thing. But being in a relationship with someone you love as a best friend is something else. Just as friendship can turn into love, love can turn into friendship and the process of realising this is often difficult and lengthy. You have got used to each other. You feel comfortable. You think you have everything. But her partner has noticed how things have shifted, that something is missing at the end. So he breaks up with her. He no longer wants to deal with this unrequited love. That's not enough for him. He wants to be loved. Loving as a friend is a wonderful thing, but for most people it is no substitute for romantic love. And sometimes it's not easy to realise that your feelings have changed, especially when you've been carrying and cherishing them for so long.

If you want to read more about these siblings you can read An Ode to HeeSu's Sisters by the lovely @soypim.

The sisters are representations of parts of Heesu. Heesin is the antithesis of Heesu. As a heterosexual woman, she can make confessions of love without receiving direct backlash. At best, she is remembered fondly and makes the person feel good even if the feelings are not reciprocated. She stands in the same spot as Chanyeong and Jiyu. It's so easy for heterosexuals to show their vulnerability. Heesu can't do that. In a homophobic society, it's not easy to tell someone you like them. It might not be remembered as a nice memory, it might be seen as an attack, an event that has negative connotations. It's so much harder for Heesu to be so open in his world. And the series manages to realise this so incredibly well.

Heejeong on the other hand stands for the missed moments, for the what-ifs, for the fact that sometimes you have to dare to take the next step if you don't want to stay trapped in the black hole of yourself forever. It's interesting that Heesu is the one to give her the advice to decide for herself, for what makes her happy, and that she shows him again that this is possible by taking a step into her own, hopefully happy future. You can decide for yourself and that's good. Heesu can also decide for himself and decide not to step into the black hole, but to pull himself out of the swamp and follow his dream. Everyone has their own black holes. Everyone deals with them differently. But trying to be happy should be possible for everyone. And even if you decide to stay in your 9-5 or, well, in your closet, that is totally fine, too. No one should stop you from doing what you want, but it is always good when there are people who support you and cherish the person you are.

Heejae. Heejae is just one step ahead of Heesu. She had her best friend as a partner and didn't realise that love had changed. She wouldn't and couldn't let go and had to wait for her partner to break up with her to realise what was going on. Heesu is caught in a similar dilemma, in love with his best friend and at some point, no longer able to distinguish between romantic and platonic love because it has always been like that. Sometimes you get lost in your feelings. Sometimes you don't realise the shift. Sometimes you need an outsider or the other person to realise this.

One thing I didn't understand is the resentment Chanyeong got. Yes, he had a lot of screentime. But that was perfectly ok. He was not only part of the side-couple, but also one of the most important people in Heesu's life. His best friend and secret crush for years. And the perfect parallel between his own heterosexual world and the queer reality in which Heesu moves. While Chanyeong had this secret crush on Summer without realising it was Jiyu, he breaks dozens of girls' hearts when they realise that he doesn't reciprocate their feelings. For Chanyeong, it's so natural for someone to confess their feelings to him and always have, and his approach to his relationship with Jiyu is also simple. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. End of story. And while the two move fearlessly together in their world and bring out the best in each other, Heesu stands alone. He has found a relatively safe anchor with Seungwon and is pretty sure that he would accept him, considering the fact that he has two mothers, but he still has to go through everything alone. He doesn't have the freedom that Chanyeong has.

And while some people have certainly been waiting for Heesu to finally confess his feelings to Seungwon, or vice versa, he first must make peace with Chanyeong. Because this friendship is threatening to drift apart. The friendship is one-sided. And they both realise that. To save them, Heesu has to be honest. And Chanyeong is allowed to react the way he did. He is allowed to be overwhelmed. He is allowed to not know how to deal with the fact that his best friend was in love with him for a long time. It's okay to be human. The important thing is that he talks to Heesu in the end and gives them a chance to readjust their status as best friends. Because Heesu is Chanyeong's best friend, and he wants to be that for Heesu too. It hurts when you feel like you're not the safe haven you always thought you were. It is allowed to have feelings. It is allowed to express them and it was bitterly necessary to do so. And it was just as necessary for Heesu to tell him the truth, because only then did the two of them have the chance to redefine their friendship. It was only through this openness that the one-sided friendship could become an equal friendship again.

Heesu. He says himself that Chanyeong and his unrequited love were his black hole. He had to face it in order to free himself from it, to free himself from the attraction of this well known crush. Because only after he's done that can he be free for the new feelings for Seungwon. I thought it was so great to see how these different infatuations manifested themselves in Heesu. With Chanyeong it was so well-rehearsed, so normal, that in the end he couldn't even know what it was like to just be Chanyeong's friend. The feelings blended together and became a daily mask for Heesu, which he knew exactly how to wear. For Seungwon, on the other hand, these feelings are new. He is helplessly at the mercy of his insecurities, the butterflies and all these new feelings.

I enjoyed seeing him like that so much. And I was happy that he was allowed to be angry with Seungwon. I could understand how he felt so well. ‘Was it fun?’ Oh, I felt that! ‘Do you know how much I struggled by myself?’ Heesu thought he had found a safe place with Seungwon where he could be who he is. And then, in the end, he finds himself alone. Heesu is hurt and finally lets it out. The boy who wanted to please everyone and had advice for everyone, who everyone confided in, but who is alone with his problems has had enough. And it bursts out of him. Fortunately, Seungwon finally manages to open his mouth, apologise and clear up the misunderstanding. And in the end, although not everyone is perfectly happy, they are on the way to a happier future. And every single character was important not only to write a good story, but also to portray the characters genuinely and realistically.

I love my bl bubble and I wouldn't want to miss it. I enjoy watching two boys fall in love and kiss in a world of candy floss and rose-coloured glasses. But I don't forget my roots either. And apart from the whole bl bubble, I think it's great to watch a series from time to time in which queer people are embedded in everyday life and you realise how different experiences in everyday life can be. How difficult it is to move as a queer person in a heteronormative world and how difficult it can be to do the seemingly simplest things for others. Heesu in Class 2 is not a bromance, but a realistic portrayal of queer youth in a society where they can be lucky that people think they are only very bromance-coded when they go to school arm in arm. In other societies, even this gesture would be unthinkable. And as beautifully simple as the bl bubble usually is, I think it's good that such soft tones also exist, which can bring life and the beauty of love in all its tones closer to a larger audience and allow a society to grow up that is more value-free, unprejudiced and open. And an adaptation of a well-known and loved story is the perfect try to give this topic a bigger audience.

I've noticed over the last few months that the bl bubble is more interested in explicit scenes than well-told stories. Why bother with a story in which the protagonists don't even kiss? Why settle for such a bromance when you can just watch two good looking guys make out, fuck the plot. And I'm not saying anything against an interlude of honey on the carpet, it has its appeal, but that doesn't mean I deny a show and its character its queerness just because there's no kissing. Sometimes the quiet sounds are the ones that need to be heard. Sometimes it's the quiet tones that have the most impact. Sometimes it's the quiet sounds that make you understand what it's like outside your own bubble and what difficulties there actually are.

If I only consume media on one side of the spectrum, then I only have a limited field of vision of everything around me. And I understand that not every type of story is to everyone's taste, and that's a good thing. Otherwise it would be pretty boring. But every now and then you should take your head out of your bubble and look around the world.  And just because something is not to your liking doesn’t mean it is bad or not well written or not worth to be told.

If you need some inspiration for some queerness in kdramas, @lurkingshan and @twig-tea gave us all a very detailed History of Queer Representation in Modern Kdrama. Thank you for that!

[twig-tea]

I've struggled with what to write about Heesu in Class 2.

Opinions have been polarized, and I know that whatever I write isn't going to resonate with at least half of the people that I follow and respect. It helped that I wasn't going into this blind. I knew it wasn't a typical BL. I had read a LOT of commentary in the past couple of weeks.

Many people who wanted the source material didn't get what they wanted/needed. I can understand that. While I typically like it when adaptations twist and build on source material, I have had the experience where I was incredibly disappointed in an adaptation. I Hear the Sunspot -> I'm talking to you. When you hold something near and dear to your heart, it hurts when you don't recognize it anymore. Especially if the adaptation removed the things that you valued and loved.

But I hadn't read the source material on this one so that wasn't a factor for me. I do plan to read it now that I've watched the show. I will probably keep the two as completely different entities in my brain. Based on people's reactions, that feels like the best move forward.

Many people who DIDN'T read the source material also didn't get what they wanted/needed. They might view it as homophobic or disrespectful of serious issues. Or it may never have connected with them emotionally. But my world is VERY homophobic so this felt very real to me. It connected emotionally and it hit HARD...at least in certain scenes.

My feelings are too raw to really discuss the show analytically. I'll talk pacing, visuals, astronomy metaphors and all that once I finish up my astronomy project for work. I'll try to approach it objectively when I write up the analysis of individual episodes. There is a lot to dive into on that score - some positive, some negative, some neutral.

However, right now, in this moment? I can't even think about how I would "rate" this show. I'm too busy having big feels after the finale. Because while it may not have been a "BL" by many people's standards, it was definitely queer. And that counts for something. I'm no high schooler - I turn forty in a little over a week - but it scraped my open wounds and made them bleed. Honestly, episode 11 of Your Sky did that to me too. I just kept my posts private on that one, because this feels like serving myself up for judgment. I might regret this post.

I tried during my two hour walk last night to figure out what I could say. Every take I tried got personal fast. I can't separate it. And in the end, I've decided to not even try.

So is this post meta analysis? No.

Is this post a critique or analytical evaluation of the show? No.

Is this an endorsement of the show? No.

Heck. Half of this post probably isn't about the show at all.

It feels weird to say since many people around me call me a robot or unfeeling, but this post is pure emotion for me. It's probably oversharing. Just like whether a show is popular or not, I don't have a gauge for that. I'm the person that will spend two weeks talking to almost no one outside of my children/husband, but then spend three hours discussing all things garlic with some random person I never met previously. That's Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo's fault. I don't really have an in between mode. I'm silent, or I don't shut up.

Warning: This got long. No surprise there. Also, in case it is a trigger for you, religion and sexuality are intertwined throughout this post and it touches on themes of coming out.

Anonymous Inbox Warning: If you read this post and come into my inbox to worry about my "mental health" or "recommend therapy" or anything similar, I'm just going to delete it. Therapy is great. I'm aware. I highly recommend and advocate for it. That is not the point here.

But after watching Heesu, here are the things stuck in my brain.

I envied Heesu and Seungwon.

Was it hard for them? Yes. Were they struggling due to things that are unfair and that I wish weren't true of society? Yes. Will they continue to struggle? Unfortunately, yes. But they're figuring themselves out and are coming to terms with their identity in high school. There's something to be said for that.

Thanks to neurodivergence and my conservative, religious upbringing, I didn't figure myself out until I was already married and had my first child. Both in terms of sexuality and my personal religious beliefs, I was in my mid to late 20s before I figured things out.

Because for many, many years I just thought I was evil and morally bankrupt. After all, I really enjoyed Cruel Intentions and I really really thought it would be a whole lot of fun to make out with Watts in the garage (Some Kind of Wonderful). @dribs-and-drabbles I loved that they were one of your ships. But I could never ship it. Keith didn't deserve her. She was mine.

But this was a problem, because I was taught that sex was the root of all evil. Even heterosexual sex. And to have such perverse desires meant something was morally and drastically wrong with you. Stupid purity culture swamp.

I decided that if I tried hard enough and studied enough, that I'd figure out how to fix my broken brain. After all, there were ways to overcome my broken hearing. There were ways to overcome my broken empathy meter. There were ways to overcome my attention issues and the chaos of my brain. Surely, there was a fix for that part of me that really liked thinking about the Olsen twins and Taylor Hanson too.

I'm fine with being called "stubborn", "argumentative", "weird", "scary" and the dozens of other not quite positive adjectives I hear about myself. I mean this with full sincerity -> it doesn't bother me. I get called plenty of positive things too. And one man's "stubborn", is another person's "independent". But I didn't want to be evil. So I tried. I really did.

It took me a long time to accept that I wasn't actually broken or morally bankrupt. It took me a long time to figure out the problem was as @babyangelsky put it that desire was considered a swamp to begin with. I'm still hoping my person accepts that one day too.

So yes, I'm incredibly happy for Heesu and Seungwon that they figured all of that out in high school. I hope this show, BLs in general and changes in society as a whole help teenagers get there much faster than me. I'm sure a smartphone or internet resources like we have today would've helped.

I felt relieved when Heesu figured out that there was someone in his world who wouldn't judge him.

Even as I deconstructed religiously and embraced my sexuality, I never worried about my (younger) brother's reaction. I always knew he'd be in my corner. He was a musical theater major. He's kissed men as part of his shows (our family doesn't know that), and he had already deconstructed (they also don't know that). He figured things out much faster than me. He listens to me talk about BLs and all of my fun dilemmas with them. We have never directly talked about my (or his) sexuality though. Sex is not something easily discussed in our family. Plus, we're still siblings. I really don't want to think of him in that way.

But I know he has my back. And that has meant everything over the years.

However, my brother lives 5 hours away. I get to talk to him only a couple of times a month (if that). He's not the people that surround me on the daily. And the people that surround me? They WILL judge. Strike that. They DO judge - everyone and everything. Openly and loudly. I live in a very close knit, very conservative, very religious family and community. It wasn't my intention to stay, but words left unsaid mean I married someone who talks a lot about traveling and seeing the world but never intended to see it.

And nine days out of ten, that's okay. I love our home that he built with his own hands, our hikes through the woods, our gaming sessions, and our "fun" times too 😉. But that tenth day when I take a break from work, stop doing the laundry or packing the kids' lunchboxes and really think about everything? It's rough.

For a very long time, I kept all of my thoughts on religion and sexuality completely secret while being swallowed alive by my black hole. I tried to convince myself that it didn't matter. But when I found that one person in my daily circle who I realized would accept me? It was a miracle. It changed everything. I eventually found a few. I'm forever grateful for those former coworkers.

It's insane how much lighter it feels when you remove the load by "just one person", and how much strength you gain when you realize that you are not really alone in your thinking. In funny things (to me), they weren't surprised. "I thought that was a given. It's pretty obvious."

Over the years, the Tumblr community has been another light for me. Even when I was lurking. Just knowing that there were people out there who'd have no problem with my kinky thoughts went a very long way. So that scene for Heesu, when he realized Seungwon wouldn't judge him - I felt it in my bones.

The tennis court scene in the finale with Chan Young/Heesu pains me...for both of them.

And I'm still standing on it.

I can't judge this scene objectively within the narrative. It got too personal so most of what I say about this scene will have very little to do with Heesu/Chan Young's actual relationship. Again, this isn't meta. This is emotion.

I had a strong negative reaction to Chan Young in episode 1. This was followed by a humorous bit of time with @lurkingshan when my brother pointed out that he was a lot like my husband all the way down to him being a competitive tennis player in high school. I didn't expect just HOW far that analogy might go though.

Because just like Heesu, I started by coming clean with my Chan Young. Difference being that my Chan Young is my friend, lover, and other half.

So this line...

I've heard it. I took YEARS to come completely clean precisely because I knew it was going to hurt him so very deeply. I tried to soften the blow. I tried to lead up to it in small steps. But it didn't help.

Side note: @my-rose-tinted-glasses By our standards for Min Jun from Business as Usual, this might make me the bad guy. It's probably why I am trying so hard to forgive him. I haven't got there with him yet. Ghosting feels different to me. Min Jun essentially left the court.

This line...

I've heard it too. It was wrapped in language about moral corruption and rebelling against religious rules just because I disagreed with them. But the gist was the same. Choosing myself is being selfish. I've just decided I'm okay with that. That I'm worth being selfish about. If I have to be my own biggest fan, so be it.

But this one...

It's the reason that I can't analyze this scene objectively (yet). Because it's true. I destroyed my husband's whole world and vision of our life together by my confession. In gaming terms, it was a headshot. In the show, Chan Young now has to reframe everything that he thought was a part of their relationship and decide where to go from here. It's not an easy task.

When I liveblogged Let Free the Curse, I said I wasn't going to touch Juyeong's cross necklace and how he removed it to be with Dohoe. That I couldn't deal with it. This is why. As @respectthepetty pointed out in their Let Free the Curse commentary, that cross is heavy for my Juyeong and it's not a fun place for me. I've put the person I love in a place where they have to choose every single day whether to put on that necklace that they VALUE and BELIEVE in or choose to embrace me, the person they love, who is also the sinner on the road to hell. It's tearing them apart and robbing them of their joy. And while I'm no longer being sucked into my personal black hole, I now get a courtside seat to all of their pain. I created a rift in their universe.

So while many people are understandably upset that Heesu is apologizing in this scene.

I didn't see it as apologizing for being queer.

I saw it as apologizing for hurting the person they love and care about. For being a source of pain. And yes, there IS a difference.

Because yes, I struggled with my identity for years. But I'm not sorry that I now understand myself, and I'm not going to trap myself in a glass room. I will not apologize for being myself. However, on that 10th day, when everything gets a bit too real for us both, I get to hear the tears at night from my person. And I am really sorry that I'm the cause of them. I really wish I wasn't.

So I'll forgive him if he hits a tennis ball at me from time to time. I'll dodge most of them. The ones that connect WILL hurt. But he's hurting too, and it's going to take time for him to put that racquet down.

We've been on this court for a very long time as he decides what to do about that cross necklace. But it took me a long time to put us on the court in the first place.

I'm really hoping we get here one day.

For both of our sakes. I really hope we do. But we may not.

For now, I'm just glad that we're both refusing to leave the court on that tenth day. Because the other nine days are still a blast.

I'll try to watch the scene with the actual narrative in mind next time.

It broke my heart when Seungwon's mom asked him what she should do.

It WRECKED me like no other scene if I'm being honest. Even worse than the tennis court scene.

Why? Because I don't want to hurt my kids. I don't want to end up on my bad mothers list. I'm trying to figure it all out, but it's tricky. I had a similar conversation to this one with my two older children just a few weeks ago. Unlike the tennis court, this is relatively new territory for me. They're just now getting old enough to understand. For context, I'm not really "out" by most people's standards within the larger community. I'd like my Chan Young to stop hitting balls at me before I move forward in that regard. I'd really like to have him by my side if I take on our community and the rest of our families. So for now I wait as he ponders what he's supposed to do.

But I haven't kept my thoughts on things or my reality from my kids in the meantime. They know my beliefs and where I stand. They are even aware that I blog and watch BL. They laughed at me quite a bit during the emoji tag game as I tried to figure out the coffin in @dramalove247 's set. They thought it meant vampire by the way.

Six days out of seven, it doesn't really impact them much at all. But on that seventh day, they're getting very mixed messages from the adults in their life. The one that says all the things we grew up with. And the one (me) that constantly says choose kindness, choose people, choose yourself, screw purity, screw normal, screw the rules.

The mixed messages will impact them. It does confuse them. And as much as I'd like to, I can't shelter them from that without lying about who I am and what I believe. But I also can't protect them from all of the ugliness in the world.

So when my braveheart that always speaks his mind asked a few weeks ago if I ever thought about just telling everyone. I responded very similarly to Seungwon's mom here. "I can do that. Do you really want me to? Just think about what would happen." It took him all of about 15 seconds. "It would be bad. Real bad. Yeah, don't do that."

So I'll stay silent and evade...for now. I'll stop when their answer changes or if, like Seungwon, they or another kid in the community needs me to flip the table for them so they can proudly embrace their own identity. Their needs are my priority when it comes to the larger community.

In the meantime, I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure they feel loved and supported for who they are. We watched Star Trek during our family movie night the other month, and when we got to this scene...

my oldest laughed. "Mom. That sounds like something you would say."

That feels like a win in my book.

And if Heesu in Class 2 makes even one queer kid have hope that they'll be accepted or gives them the courage to step into the light in a world that's not a BL bubble, then that's a win in my book too.

No matter where I end up rating it once I can approach it more objectively.

[twig-tea]

A Brief History of Queer Representation in Modern Kdrama

Earlier this week, totally unrelated to Heesu in Class 2, @twig-tea and I were making a list of kdramas with proper queer representation, because Twig loves to track queer things and I love to make highly specific lists. In light of all the discussion around Heesu and its appeal to a mainstream kdrama audience, we thought it would be helpful to share as context for what Heesu’s creators set out to do, how it compares to Love in the Big City and its goals, and why both shows are so significant for those who are not as familiar with this media landscape. We wrote the below together (strap in, folks, it's a long one).

As always, let us be clear what we are talking about with this list. We’re only looking at modern mainstream kdrama, so this list is not inclusive of Korean queer cinema or QL dramas, both of which have a rich history of their own. And when we say queer representation, we mean canonically queer characters that are acknowledged as such in the text of the show, if not by saying the words, at least by openly acknowledging same sex attraction. If there’s anything we know about queer people on the internet, it’s that our community can read gay subtext into anything, but that’s not what we’re doing here. For this list we are only interested in depictions of LGBTQ+ people that are clear and spelled out for anyone watching a show.  In addition, for the purposes of this list we are talking about intentional inclusion of queer characters with a proper role in the story, not nominal nods to queer people existing (like every Hong Seok Cheon cameo in a drama), comedic gender bending without real reckoning with sexuality (ala The King’s Affection), use of queer people as the butt of a joke (glaring at you Vincenzo), queerness in psychosexual dreams to titillate and generate buzz (hiiiii Friendly Rivalry), or subtextual gay tension between two same sex actors who happen to have chemistry (waves hello to The Devil Judge). The point of this exercise is to chart the evolution of significant queer representation in kdrama—both good and bad—not to document every gay character that ever appeared for two seconds on screen. That said, while Shan has watched several hundred kdramas and Twig has tried to watch everything gay on the planet, it’s possible we missed something that should be here, so let us know if you think we did (though please do mind the criteria and don’t send us an impassioned essay about why Beyond Evil should count). 

With that, let’s begin our walk through of the last two decades of queer characters in kdrama. 

Coffee Prince (2007) 

Among the most famous dramas on this list, Coffee Prince kicked off queer rep in modern kdrama with a classic gender bender in which Go Eun Chan, a girl, pretends to be a boy for Reasons. But what made it stand out is that her love interest falls for her while he still thinks she’s a man and has a whole sexual identity crisis and bisexual coming out process. Choi Han Gyul (and Gong Yoo), you will always be famous! This show was sincerely groundbreaking, not only for depicting a male romance lead struggling with his sexuality, but also including lots of gender fuckery for the female lead. It’s still one of the most significant queer kdramas ever made.

Life is Beautiful (2010) 

This show is notable for how high it set the bar and how nothing has reached it since. Yang Tae Sub is our central character in this 63-hour ensemble family drama, and his arcs struggling with the closet, falling in love, coming out, commitment, and marriage (yes: marriage! In 2010!), are surprisingly realistic and touching without being too cliche. Kyung Soo and Tae Sub start as a casual hookup, and they have to recalibrate as their feelings change (and yes, they kiss on screen and the show is clear that they have sex throughout the series). They fight, they make up, and as their relationship deepens they have other problems in their lives they support one another through—their gayness is not the only or even the most interesting thing about them. It’s also notable that both of these actors (Song Chang Eui and Lee Sang Woo) were established kdrama stars before taking these roles. 

Secret Garden (2010)

This het romance features a side character (played by our beloved Lee Jong Suk) who is a young musical prodigy pursued for his talents by the second lead, a senior musician. Over the course of the story we learn that he’s gay and harboring feelings for his would-be mentor. His plot is minor, but he ends the story happy and successful in his career, if not in a relationship. It’s small scale representation in the grand scheme of things, but one of only a handful of decent depictions of a gay person in kdrama at that point.

Reply 1997 (2012) 

This wildly popular drama (at the time, it was one of the highest rated cable dramas in history) that spawned two follow-up iterations features a gay character, Joon Hee, who is in love with his long time best friend, Yoon Jae, and confides his feelings to their other best friend, Shi Won. Of course, this show is ultimately Yoon Jae and Shi Won’s love story, so Joon Hee does not get his happy romance ending, but his friends and the show treat him with kindness and compassion, and his character was well received by audiences. 

Reply 1994 (2013)

Similar to its predecessor, this drama featured a side character with a gay subplot, but this time it was more about questioning his identity. Bingguere is a character whose arc is all about his confusion and indecision, and that extended to his sexuality when he struggled to understand his attraction to the male lead. Ultimately, he moves past those feelings and we learn his partner in the future is a woman, and the drama doesn’t really clarify where his sexuality landed. It’s kind of weak in terms of explicit queer rep, but showing a man grappling with his sexuality in a very popular family drama still feels significant.

Seonam Girls High School Investigations (2014) 

While most of their content is limited to two episodes of this 14-episode high school drama, Eun Bin and Soo Yeon have, to our knowledge, the first lesbian kiss on Korean television, which earns them a place on this list. They are an established couple struggling with how their relationship is a risk for them (because it can be and is used against them). Their relationship doesn’t survive to the end of the series, but they are treated with compassion and their humanity is underscored by the narrative. They also spark an important conversation among the main characters about whether they should be helped because they’re gay, which was a little better intentioned than it was executed, but the show had the spirit. 

Perseverance Goo Hae Ra (2015)

In a show about aspiring musicians forming a group to take a second shot at stardom, Jang Goon (portrayed by solo idol Park Kwang Seon) is one of the core group members with a heartwarming arc about acceptance. His story is about his father coming to terms with him being an idol and being gay. He has a one-sided confession scene that is decently done, and the scene where his father accepts him knowing the truth (after having been outed against his will) is genuinely moving. It was also touching to see the girl who originally crushed on him support him once she found out about his sexuality. 

Hogu’s Love (2015) 

This drama was considered progressive for its time, as its core plot is about Hogu, a man who decides to support his first love when he finds out she is pregnant with someone else’s child. In addition to that, side character Kang Chul has an arc where he experiences attraction to Hogu and tries to sort out his feelings, considering whether he identifies as gay before ultimately deciding he does not. It’s not the best rep we’ve ever seen, but it was part of an interesting attempt by a drama to explore complicated social and identity issues.

The Lover (2015)

Lee Jun Jae and Takuya (played by Lee Jae Joon who was also in the gay film Night Flight (2014) and Takuya of jpop group CROSS GENE) are roommates in this series about four couples in an apartment building. Their story starts as a comedy, in which Jun Jae and Takuya end up in ship moments that are played off by the narrative as jokes and misunderstandings, but then they catch feelings for real. We see one of the characters struggle with his queer awakening and there is a happy ending. Using the actors’ real names was a choice, and led to some seriously disruptive RPF shipping; but it was refreshing to have an active idol not only play gay but in a romance with a happy ending. 

Prison Playbook (2017)

Another ensemble show with a queer side character; Loony, one of the main character Je Hyuk’s cell mates, is notable for his queerness not being used as a joke and not being the core of the character’s arc. Instead, this character struggles with addiction and how that affects his relationship, which is only incidentally gay. His story is moving and well developed, especially considering the size of this cast, but it doesn’t get a ton of screen time.

Romance is a Bonus Book (2019)

The queer rep in this drama is minor but overall positive, as we learn that the male lead Eun Ho’s ex-girlfriend, who he is still friendly with, ended their relationship because she fell in love with a woman. The show presents her as a lovely person who helps the female lead several times and is happy in her lesbian relationship, and we even get to see her with her partner briefly. A small win for sapphic representation in a very popular Netflix drama.

Moment at Eighteen (2019)

Jung Oh Je (RIP Moonbin) is a side character friend of the main lead. His sexuality becomes part of the plot when he is confessed to by a friend of the female lead, and he admits that he has a crush on the second male lead (Ma Hwi Young). While the characters in the show are mixed in their response, it’s clear the story is on the side of treating Oh Je with compassion. 

Be Melodramatic (2019) 

This is an ensemble show centered on a group of friends who move in together to support a grieving young woman, Lee Eun Jung, and one of the housemates is her younger brother Lee Hyo Bong, a gay musician with a long-term partner. He is a side character and his most significant plot is about supporting his sister, with his sexuality and relationship part of his characterization rather than an active story thread. It’s a positive depiction and the way his sexuality is presented as just part of who he is felt significant at the time. 

Love with Flaws (2019) 

Joo Won Suk (RIP Cha in Ha) is one of the FL’s older brothers, and while not the focus of the drama he gets his own fully developed arc, including the mentorship of queer side character Choi Ho Dol. The queer rep in this show covers suicidality, the loneliness of the closet, bullying, solidarity, and fear of parental shame. That makes it sound depressing, but it’s a hopeful story about the character moving out of depression and into self-acceptance, has one of the best scenes depicting gay acceptance from a father in any show, and both Won Suk and Ho Dol have a happy ending (including for their romance). 

Itaewon Class (2020)

The first drama on this list to feature a transgender character, Itaewon Class is about a group of social misfits trying to launch a restaurant on a trendy street in Itaewon. Ma Hyun Yi, a transgender woman saving money for her gender affirming surgery, is among the gang. Her story is not a big focus for the drama, but she gets a nice arc about coming into herself and gaining recognition for her talents as a chef, and the other characters always respect her identity. It’s pretty solid representation for a side character.

Sweet Munchies (2020)

This drama tries to tackle the problems of homophobia and appropriating queerness but misses the mark on both. The queer character in this show, Kang Tae Wan, is here to function as a driving force and conscience for the main male lead and female lead; he’s essentially the second lead but never had a chance (though he didn’t know it, since the main lead is pretending to be gay for clout). Tae Wan is a good character, but the narrative doesn’t care much about him or about queer people in general, it’s focused on how heterosexuals experience queerness. Not exactly amazing queer representation, whatever its intentions.

Run On (2020) 

This drama features both a gay character and an asexual character, both of whom are written respectfully and get proper coming out scenes. There is also some messiness around one of the main characters appropriating queer identity as a way to avoid the pressures of her patriarchy, and the drama knows she’s wrong for that. This was one of the first instances of a kdrama acknowledging queer people as a regular part of the world around us and not singular oddities, and it was nice to see multiple facets of queer representation in one show.

Mr. Queen (2020)

This gender bender retains its place on the list because the main character (a man who awakens in the body of a Queen during the Joseon dynasty) openly struggles with his gender dysphoria as well as what it means that he’s attracted to a man, and these struggles are present for the bulk of the show. The character also has sex with both men and women while in that body. It’s one of the better representations of gender swap and feels queer, even when the relationship on screen has the guise of heterosexuality. 

Mine (2021)

In this drama about ambitious women married to powerful men who struggle to break free from their constraints, one of the main characters reunites with her first love—another woman. The drama follows Jung Seo Hyun as she struggles to acquire the power she needs to live as she wants, and she ultimately achieves her goal, reuniting with her lover at the story’s end. It’s the first kdrama with a lesbian character in a major role who gets her happy romance ending. 

Move to Heaven (2021)

Despite only being featured in episode 5, this was a good story that garnered a lot of attention in a popular Netflix drama, so for cultural impact reasons alone it belongs on this list. We start the episode with Jung Soo Hyun’s death, but this is a show about finding closure after death, so for once this death doesn’t feel like bury your gays. This is a compassionate tragedy in which we see how fear held Soo Hyun back from his relationship with Ian Park while he was alive, but his belongings at death indicate he was getting ready to face his fear and move to the US to marry Ian after all. Through the main characters of the show, Ian gets the closure of knowing Soo Hyun loved him. 

Nevertheless (2021) 

Yoon Sol and Seo Ji Wan have a typical plot for side characters (they’re in the female lead’s friend group) with a friends-to-lovers arc that depicts the fear and frustration when both friends are closeted and uncertain about risking the friendship but reach the point where they can’t pretend anymore. Since they’re both women, this felt pretty radical. They got a good romantic arc and a happy ending, if not a lot of screen time.

Under the Queen’s Umbrella (2022)

In this sageuk, the fourth prince is living a double life, hiding away makeup and women’s clothing that they wear in secret. The character is depicted as trans, but given the setting, explicit language and modern terminology (including altered pronouns) are not used in this side plot. When the prince’s mother finds out, she supports her child to have an artist paint a portrait of their true self, and ultimately, the prince leaves the royal family to go live a more authentic life in isolation in a bittersweet resolution. 

A Time Called You (2023)

The queer rep in this drama comes in the form of a brief backstory montage for two gay characters, one of whom (Yeon Jun) is in a coma. We learn that he ended up in this state after getting into a car accident while in the process of confessing to the guy he mutually liked (Tae Ha), who was killed in the accident. From there, Yeon Jun’s body is taken over by a heterosexual character (it’s a whole time loop thing). This entry is mostly notable for featuring a high profile cameo from Rowoon playing Tae Ha, and unfortunately, for being a fairly textbook example of the bury your gays trope. In 2023!

Wedding Impossible (2024) 

This disaster of a drama purported to finally feature a gay character in a prominent role that drove the narrative—in a story about Do Han pretending to marry his longtime friend to avoid being forced to marry another woman—but Do Han ended up a minor side character in his own story when the show chose to focus nearly all its attention on his brother’s het romance. Worse, the other characters treated him terribly and the story blamed every problem on his sexuality. This show was straight up homophobic and it was a significant regression for queer depictions in mainstream Korean media. 

Bitter Sweet Hell (2024)

image credit @respectthepetty

Choi Doi Hyun (played by Park Jae Chan of Semantic Error) is the closeted son of the main character, struggling with how hiding his secret affects his school life and his relationship with his family. His story ends happily with Jun Ho in the US, which felt like a win after the above history with kdrama, but because his secret being his queerness is hidden for most of the story, we don’t get to see it inform the narrative much except in retrospect. 

Squid Game 2 (2024)

The most recent entry on our list features Park Sung Hoon as Hyeon Ju, a transgender woman who enters the life or death game at the center of this drama to earn money to move to Thailand and get gender affirming surgery. While her inclusion wasn't entirely groundbreaking, Hyeon Ju was a well-developed character with a sympathetic backstory who quickly became a fan favorite, notable given Squid Game's popularity and broad international audience. 

Bringing Better Queer Stories to Mainstream Drama Audiences

With all that context established, we have been contemplating how queer creators in Korea can reach a wider audience with their stories and ensure queer representation in kdrama is both more common and more authentic. We look to Love in the Big City and Heesu in Class 2 as a start, as we would argue that both shows exist in the gray space between mainstream kdrama and kbl. They both leverage kdrama style and structure to tell queer stories that include, but are not limited to, gay romances. They both had unusual distribution and battled to even get released and in front of an audience, with LITBC rushing its episodes out amidst public protests and Heesu sitting on the shelf for two years before being quietly released on a streaming platform. And they both had goals to reach an audience beyond the usual BL viewers, albeit with wildly different tones and themes in their stories. The BL audience is too niche to effect the social change that queer creators are seeking, and the limited runtime, genre tropes, and laser-focus on romance means it is harder to make wider social and cultural points in a BL story (it doesn’t hit the same when gay characters are treated as human in a story that takes place in the no homophobia BL bubble). And as we’ve seen from this walk through the past, there are real limits to queer representation that is not created by queer people or informed by their lived experiences.

As you can see from reviewing this list, these two shows were the first kdramas in well over a decade (after the only other example, Life Is Beautiful) to center on a gay main character whose journey drove the story, and they were doing this in the context of a media landscape that rarely elevates queer people beyond minor side plots, still regularly fumbles on respectful representation, and in which representation seems to be getting worse. Love in the Big City set out to show a young queer man’s life in all its glorious messiness. Go Young was not an easy character, and the show did not hold back on his flaws or shy away from either the joy or the struggle he found in his sexuality. Heesu is about a younger character and so his struggles are centered around coming of age and first love, but it similarly depicts a beautifully flawed young gay man coming to terms with himself and asks the audience to empathize with and care about him as his loved ones in the story do. Where LITBC uses a unique storytelling structure to draw in the viewer and highlight what makes Young’s life feel different, Heesu roots itself in familiar drama beats and queer-coded side plots in the hopes that the audience will see and be comforted by the familiar in Heesu’s world. 

Both of these stories, in their own way, speak to a mainstream audience and ask for queer existence and queer humanity to be acknowledged. And this does not make them problematic as queer works, because they accomplish their goals of speaking to a wider audience while still being true to queer experiences. Given how scant decent queer representation has been in kdramas over the last twenty years (consider the size of the list above against the fact that there are well over 1500 modern kdramas, and so few of the above listed characters are mains or even significant sides in these dramas), more shows like LITBC and Heesu are needed to bridge this gap. We sincerely hope they find the support they need to get made.

[twig-tea]

Heesu in Class 2 - OST

[twig-tea]

Heesu In Class 2 gives these queer moms hope

❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Heesu In Class 2 isn't targeting the BL audience, it's queer representation in a Kdrama and that makes us excited. This difference means that the struggles of being a queer youth were expertly contrasted against those living a het normative life, wrapped it all up inside a cute kdrama, and delivered it to a much wider audience. An audience that may not have seen this perspective before. And the messages Heesu In Class 2 delivers to this audience are both powerful and important.

Love is Love. Mutual love is a precious gift and should be celebrated in all forms.

There were so many great messages during this series, but that felt like the final thought of Heesu's story. One that Heesu made when he said:

"Such insignificant tiny beings like us manage to find each other amidst countless specks of dust. How great of a miracle is that?"

The struggles of Heesu's sisters gives us all the evidence we need to see how precious it is to find someone that returns our feelings.

There were lots of other incredible messages/moments throughout the series that we were obsessed with. We already talked ourselves out of rewatching the series just to collect more evidence for this post, so we will try to be satisfied with only listing the ones we remember off the top of our heads.

A quick list of epic moments Heesu In Class 2 delivered to a wider audience:

"Maybe everyone can see what I am trying so hard to hide." Starting off the series by showing Heesu's fear of someone discovering his crush.

Constant contrast between queer vs het experience/acceptance. TWICE calling out the difference in difficulty and risk for a queer person to confess a crush. "I'm pretending not to know."

"Before my secret swallows me up. Before I fall into this dark hole forever." Heesu talking about the danger of secrets in episode 9.

Seung Won talking to Heesu about his mom being with a woman after ending her unhappy marriage to his father, "They live together 'cause the like each other. It's much better than living with someone you don't like."

Heesu finding comfort when he learns that Seung Won sees nothing wrong with being queer:

"At least Seung Won wouldn't hate me just for being myself, or get mad because I'm different. The moment I thought that... the weight on my mind was lightened by the weight of just one person."

Seung Won's mom's willingness to lie to spare him from the judgement of others. Seung Won choosing the truth over the constant work it would take to live in a lie.

Heesu's fear of being outed when he receives that threat. The disgustingness and cruelty of someone being willing to out him for revenge.

We HATE Heesu and Seung Won trying to play off their relationship as a "bromance" in public. But we also LOVE it because once again it is in direct contrast/comparison to the het couple and including this bitter pill is both realistic for their story and shows the audience the inequality, fear and pain in not being accepted by society. So we hate that this poisoned our happy ending, but we hope it gives the larger audience something to think about.

Series like these plant the seeds that change hearts. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

We sincerely hope this series reaches as many people as possible with it's important messaging. We have even decided to make a MyDramaList account just so we can support this series. Our hope is that this story moves some people. Causes them to stop and think. Gives them a new perspective. And hopefully finds it's way to some lonely Heesus out there and gives them hope.

[twig-tea]

An Ode to HeeSu's Sisters

I adored HeeSu in Class 2 and was so excited every time we got to see more about the side character’s lives and relationships. It serves as a great example of how supporting characters can meaningfully reinforce the themes of a story. I loved all the characters, but, as someone who grew up with siblings, I have a soft spot for HeeSu’s sisters. So, I wanted to take a second to talk about each one for bit.

please be advised that the following will contain spoilers for the series.

The main roles that all of HeeSu’s sisters play in the narrative are as mentors to him. Their advice to him directly influences the actions he takes in his own life, and as an audience we’re able to see how their subplots allow him to learn from his sister’s experiences and apply those lessons to his own situation. The show also does a beautiful job of showing how the sisters influence each other and not just HeeSu.

Ok, let’s start where the series starts. With our youngest sister, HeeSin

HeeSin: The Pain...And Dare I Say Hope?...From Rejection

HeeSin has one of my favorite introductions to a character ever. Her first couple of scenes told us everything we needed to know:

1. She’s told a guy she likes him as soon as she could

2. She was rejected

3. She’s heartbroken

4. She loves a good, dramatic wallow in the pits despair

5. This happens A Lot

In episode 1 when HeeSu tells his sisters about the lesbian confession, Heesin’s reaction to the girl’s crush already having a girlfriend was fascinating.

“There’s still a chance then! You see? If you never confess then you’ll never know!” It really reveals a lot about her mindset that this was her first thought.

She also pointed out that sometimes it could be nice just to know that someone likes you. For a person who has clearly confessed to people and gotten rejected many times, this initially struck me as an absolutely unexpected take. However, it does makes sense though that this character would need to find a bright side to these frankly painful experiences. Getting rejected can be incredibly painful. When I took my first social psychology class I learned that rejection can manifest as actual physical pain in humans. Thus it’s only logical that HeeSin would have developed a positive mindset towards these rejections she’s frequently faced as a way to soothe the pain.

“They’ll always know me as someone who liked them, which could makes me a special person to them.” This hopeful notion is what leads HeeSu to attempt to confess his feelings to ChanYoung at the park, and while he’s running over there his monologue exposes something pretty important. HeeSu not only feels that his crush on ChanYoung his hopeless, but also that there is no hope in this universe that someone he likes could like him back.

But what HeeSin’s arc shows us is that there actually IS hope!! She doesn’t just bag a regular dude, but she bags a guy who was already in a relationship. That’s one of the more unlikely scenarios, and yet this is the one that actually ends up working out for her. It hearkens back to HeeSu’s monologue about how impossible it felt to him to ever have someone he likes also like him back, along with HeeSin’s assertion at the kitchen table that you really will never know what could happen unless you express your feelings. Could you get rejected? Oh, absolutely. Could it actually work out? Well, there’s always a chance!

Now, at this point you may be looking at me funny like, “yeah ok, Pim, but HeeSin is a woman confessing to guys. Typically the worst-case scenario for a straight person confessing to their crush is they get rejected. They don’t need to worry about homophobia, being hate-crimed, being kicked out of their home, or being disowned all because of their sexual orientation.” And to that I say, you’re right. Confessing for queer people comes with an extra layer of complexity, which is where our next sister comes in.

HeeJeong: Living Authentically Is Fucking Hard (But You Should Do It If You Can)

Something @bengiyo brought up in this post is that many of the subplots in this series are queer-coded and HeeJeong’s is no exception. Basically, HeeJeong and her boyfriend wanted to go to New York to study abroad together, but last minute she decides not to go with him and presumably they end their relationship but are still close. She spends time with him when he comes into town, and seems to have accepted the uncertainty of whether or not he’ll even come back home after his studies.

What is notable about all of this is that her siblings have clearly been unaware of the full background story. It seems that she never told them to the full sequence of events leading to their breakup. She even lies to them at first about why she was coming home late. It isn’t until HeeSu tells her that she should do whatever she wants and that he’ll have her back no matter what, that HeeJeong starts to tell her siblings what’s going on. She doesn’t reveal everything, but she at least owns her decisions and tells them that they don’t need to worry.

HeeJeong’s arc felt like a coming out metaphor to me. Not only is what Heesu says to her an ideal response to coming out to someone you’re close to, but her fear of judgment from her family really resonated with me as someone who has come out to family in the past.

What makes her arc feel even more like a coming out story is that it isn’t over once she tells her family about it. She actually is left with a decision to make: does she want to keep living as she has been or does she want to take a big leap in order to live the life she wants.

And the life she wants to live isn’t easy to achieve either. She needs to quit her job, leave her family, move to a different country, and at the end of the day she isn’t even sure if she and her boyfriend will end up getting back together. But like she said, she truly wanted to study more and she decided she was finally ready to follow that desire.

I think HeeJeong is meant to represent what could happen when we decide not to live authentically to what we want. Which, in most cases, what actually happens is whole lot of nothing. This of course applies to queer folk like HeeSu who could be obliged to just never confess his current feelings for SeungWon or his past feelings for ChanYoung. But it also applies to everyone. You want to become a nurse, but you never apply to nursing school for fear of rejection? Ok, then you’ll just never be a nurse. You want to go study abroad, but you get scared and decide not to go? Ok, then you’ll just stay at home with your siblings and keep working at the same job. But! You’ll always be thinking “what if?” What if I just applied? What if I just asked him out? What if I just moved to that new city?

As HeeJeong said herself, it can be really scary to take a big leap to do what you want. There are indeed risks and stakes involved, but because her ex is also her best friend she feels more comfortable knowing she wont be alone. She doesn’t say it out loud, but it’s clear that HeeSu’s support also helped her be more comfortable in going after what she wants.

After HeeJeong first tells the siblings that Yes She Still Hangs Out With Her Ex and That’s What She Wants To Do and That’s Her Business Thank You So Much, the next step the story takes is to examine what happens when you keep living a life that is unsustainable.

HeeJae: Complacency Is Comfy But Precarious

I pondered HeeJae’s role in this story for a long time. She’s the only sister whose significant other we actually meet, and from the beginning she is the most nonchalant about her relationship. Her attitude towards her relationship is so indifferent and detached, especially considering they keep breaking up and getting back together again.

I’ve never been in an on-and-off type of relationship, so her unwavering confidence that her boyfriend would come beg her to take him back was nothing short of astounding to me. People really live like that? Insane. But that’s kind of the point of her entire arc.

The actual definition of complacency is ‘A feeling of contentment or self-satisfaction, especially when coupled with an unawareness of danger, trouble, or controversy.’ This very much describes HeeJae’s approach to her relationship. She doesn’t question what she wants from her relationship until something happens that she doesn’t expect: Her boyfriend breaks up with her this time. What she tells him during their break-up in the park is that she likes that they’re like family, he’s her best friend, and that she likes that she’s comfortable with him.

The problem here is that relationships, actual functional relationships, are not one-sided. She clearly never took the time to ask herself, and especially not her boyfriend, whether he’s actually happy in the type of relationship they have. He tells her though, “I still want to be loved.”

Rather than making a statement about queerness, I feel like HeeJae’s arc is about relationships in general. It’s certainly in conversation with HeeSu and ChanYoug’s story line about the dangers of one-sided relationships. That arc deserves its own posts, but what I will say is that it felt right to have HeeJae and JeongGu’s confrontation in the park in the same episode as HeeSu and ChanYoung’s confrontation on the tennis court. Both of those relationships needed to be reevaluated, and the conclusion of both of those conversations was the same: things need to change but it’s all gonna be ok.

In Conclusion

These were just my personal takeaways from the sisters and how they added so much depth to this story. There's definitely more that could be said about them and I'm sure there are different takes, but since I hadn't seen anyone else really talk about them I wanted to at least start the conversation and show the some love. 💖

[twig-tea]

i actually cried twice watching the heesu in class 2 finale.... the show handled closet anxiety and the fears of queer youth so kindly and deftly I'm gonna miss it immensely

[twig-tea]

If it's something you're interested in talking about, I'd be interested to hear your thoughts about the ways Heesu succeeded in expanding a BL to a more mainstream category vs. some of the shows like Spare Me Your Mercy and I Hear the Sunspot etc. that I know you felt missed the mark

Hey anon, thanks for the ask. This is a good question, because there is important nuance in discussions of how to expand the reach of queer art (and as I have written about before, confusing commercial success with artistic merit). I think for me this idea of what is a successful version of taking queer stories more mainstream is about two primary things: 1) does the story stay authentic to queer truth even as it speaks to a broader audience and 2) does the story stay honest to the genre it's working in and give the queer characters the same full spectrum of humanity that it would hets in the same story. Note that all of these shows have source material that differs from the screen adaptation, so I am only talking about the shows here.

For me, SMYM missed the mark on this by setting its story in a genre that would normally have a more mature and sexually explicit depiction of an adult couple and intentionally removing much of that material for a queer pairing to cater to het sensibilities, along with generally de-emphasizing the romantic development to the point where the main pair's relationship trajectory was confusing to follow. I Hear the Sunspot missed the mark by artificially interrupting and regressing the main relationship to put off letting them get together and switch focus to a side character. Neither of these shows felt like they were depicting an honest relationship progression, and the creators spoke openly about making those choices to disrupt the queer narrative intentionally in seeking broader appeal. Essentially, these shows betrayed their own genre conventions and de-emphasized aspects of the characters' queer experiences to try to appeal to a broader (and homophobic) audience.

In seeking to speak to a more mainstream audience, Heesu took a different approach. It set its story within the high school romance kdrama framework, and it followed the conventions of that genre to a tee (including all the romances, het or queer, staying chaste). And despite not seeing sexual content for the characters, the entire narrative was about Heesu's experiences as a queer person, his journey to coming out to his loved ones, and his pursuit of a queer romantic relationship that made him feel fulfilled and content. It called to mind Japanese queer programming that is specifically created to depict "alternative lifestyles" to a mainstream audience to promote tolerance and understanding (think Koisenu Futari or Oppan). The intent behind this show was to help a broader audience understand and empathize with the reality of life as a queer teenager in Korea, not to obfuscate it. It sought to make the audience care about queer people by showing us who they are instead of hiding who they are. That, for me, is the crucial difference.

[twig-tea]

Quick thoughts on Lahn Mah (or How to Make Millions Before Grandma Dies):

(I've waited for Lahn Mah for quite some time, or basically ever since @clairedaring brought it to my attention. Thank you Claire for being the greatest GDH film studio hype person on this site ❤️)

It's such a simple story. We have our boy M. deciding to care for his terminally ill grandmother as he counts on some perks in her testament. There's really nothing super exciting about it. You can envision how the plot will go before you even start the movie.

It's a simple story but told very thoughtfully. There's a surprising level of depth to the characters that prevents the whole thing from being drowned in sentimentality. The movie does not shy away from the mundane, often bitter side of internal family affairs. Every character does questionable things, some relationships are hanging by a thread but it's not odd. or created to make more artificial drama. It's painfully realistic.

It was very relatable to me. Halfway through the movie, I wasn't just simply watching it. I was at the same time analyzing relationships within my very own family, comparing some scenes with my own experiences because I have seen these dialogues play out in real life. I may come from a completely different culture but let me tell you, we could switch a goddess with a cross or a saint and we could have the same narrative unfold somewhere in central Europe. Also, the scene where they were playing cards? My late granddad taught me how to play (and cheat). So yeah, there are plenty of opportunities to have a good cry not even because of the movie but because of the memories.

The huge strength of the movie is the way that it was filmed. We are immersed in the world in which our characters are living (which is an interesting world of the Thai Chinese family, slowly losing the connection with their roots). The space is telling the story which is as important as all the dialogues. Some of the most emotional moments are connected with the way the space changes. Or when characters change but the space does not.

Our two main actors are a blast. The movie relies on their performance and the push and pull of their characters. It's a fantastic dynamic that I imagine might have been quite hard to perfect but they did it!

The plot might be simple, and it might not be subtle but it can be a healing experience for some. I loved the parallels that I could catch that tied everything together and I appreciated that it is not some artsy deconstruction of a family's condition in the modern world. Sometimes all you need is a heartwarming piece of cinema made for a broad audience that's very easy to connect to.

tldr; Pat Boonnitipat made me cry again with his heartfelt depiction of a youngster taking care of an elder in the family. Contains a solid cast, a story of personal growth that we've all seen before and just enough amount of humour to nicely wrap it up. If you have a good relationship with your family it's a great opportunity for a bonding experience.

[The movie is available on Netflix for now only for these countries but has many more subtitles available besides English. It's also in selected US theatres since the 13th of September]

[twig-tea]

Heesu in Class 2

I’ve posted that’s it’s hard to write about heesu in class 2. I don’t mind critique. I really don’t (heck I agreed with some of the critique). But the amount of negativity I feel does mischaracterize what this show is actually like so the audience reaction is going to be part of my review. There is a lesson in expectation setting here which could have helped with some of the backlash. What things boiled down to is that this show is worth watching. The show has a kdrama style but it is good. It’s well acted, well shot and there is clear direction on where it’s going. Everything has a purpose in supporting Heesu’s journey towards self-acceptance or the audience acceptance of that journey.

This might feel like an odd analogy but comparing this show to breaking bad: people complain that it's a slow/boring at the beginning because it's setting up so many different things. I never felt like Heesu was boring but it's comparable to me because the audience is receiving a lot of information that you won't get a pay off for until much later. Because the pay off is so delayed that it feels great when it happens.

I understood what the show was doing even when sometimes I didn't like all of it. The Chang Young and Ji Hu were a contrast in straight couples having it easier but also something that audience could link onto while waiting for the pay off of heesu and seong won getting together. But I think that didn't quite work because of audiences mind set going into the show and they were not that enthralling. But I think partially by design: they were the smooth ride with so little hurtles to overcome and the focus and the anticipation is on heesu and seong won where it should be.

I'm going to be compassionate with the critiques because I do think certain things were stacked against this show. I think it was supposed to be released two years ago. There were rumors of it being straight washed. If that's already in people's heads and a het couple gets added. Manhaw readers have expectations and then this is not a regular bl format. All this is going to make it an uphill battle for the show.

However despite all that and even my own hesitancy about the format I did recognize the quality and the heart of the show. I loved heesu, seong won, ji hu from the start no problem. Heesu's family and his interactions with them are amazing. I surprised at the level of anger this show has received past the mid point when things started picking up more speed. There are a lot of good things here and I assumed that would shine through despite the previous perceptions.

I wish I and others had gone into this show in the same way I did with love in the big city. If I knew it was not a conventional format I think I would have set myself up better.

I immediately connected with Heesu as a character. I recognize the emotionality, the jealousy, the possessiveness, the meaness. The feeling of creating discomfort for others just by existing. We've seen self-acceptance stories before but this feels unique and feels honest. The acknowledgment of the internal consequences of homophobia.

What I want to emphasize is that there is excellence in this show which for me makes the critique irrelevant. Heesu’s journey is the core of why this show is so good. Personally I cry every time I think about it for too long. To have that othering been seen and acknowledged and the effect of it and to walk through it. Episode 9 is something that will stay with me. That episode couldn’t have happened without the build up of the previous episodes.

I don’t want to speak on how people are feeling but there is something here about the intensity of this reaction. It’s like there is an undercurrent of protectiveness of bl and fear of this overt queer expression being taken away. For me the core of this story does speak truth to the queer experience and love for it. I disagree with the idea that the show is homophobic (queerbaiting, straightwashing, etc.) because despite it’s framing everything in the story is in service of a queer character's acceptance of his queerness.

I’m accepting that the show did not resonate in the same way with everyone that it did for me. The point of this post is to say maybe to not be dissuaded by the response and see if it resonates with you.

[twig-tea]

Heesu in Class 2: Maybe It’s Time to Stop Calling Myself a BL Viewer

After finishing Heesu in Class 2, it’s been surprising to feel like I’m in the minority for enjoying it. We’ve seen a great deal of concerted posting from fans of the webtoon about how this show betrayed its source material with its adaptation changes. Over the last few weeks, I’ve read the original webtoon to gather my own thoughts. After reading through @my-rose-tinted-glasses post on why this project didn’t work for her, I decided to sit with it for a while. I then came across this tweet from Dr. Thomas Baudinette:

I respect Dr. Baudinette’s academic interest in the genre and the useful insider insight he brings to the table. However, I will say plainly that I think this is a grossly disingenuous take, grounded in the idea that stories about queer romance take precedence over other queer stories. Additionally, it deeply misreads the adaptation choices and insinuates that a queer show that includes heterosexuality in it is somehow betraying the BL audience. There’s a lot to unpack here, but I will say plainly that I will go back to just being a queer cinephile who dabbles in BL instead of advocating for BL if this is who we are.

I am a queer person here for stories about queer truth. BL is a romance genre. While I respect BL viewers who are here to get their feelings from swoony moments, I cannot abide the presumption that a story that is inherently about the coming out experience somehow let its source material down for maintaining that connection. Every year we get into a big fight about what is or isn’t BL (see: 180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us, Love in the Big City, What Did You Eat Yesterday?, etc.), often arguing that BL is a branding term used to get romance viewers to show up and support queer works. I think it’s fine enough to argue that Heesu in Class 2 isn’t a BL because it uses Korean drama frameworks (@lurkingshan) for its story instead of sandblasting you in the face with pop music as two boys stare at each other, but I think there’s real value in what the show is doing for mainstream viewers.

I’ve avoided discussing the webtoon too much in my commentary, but now that I have read it I will say firmly that this would have sucked as a TV show. We know that about 40-50% of the shows we get each year are based on their source material. The webtoon is adorable and well-intentioned. It’s also a very simple narrative in which we are primarily in Heesu’s point of view, and any time we leave his point of view it’s to see only what other people are thinking about him. In my opinion, simpler narratives like the Heesu webtoon work best as films and not as dramas. 

We recently went through this with Living With Him, in which a really short manga got stretched to eight episodes and had to add contrivances to the middle to pad out the time that eventually hurt the core narrative. Thai BL is rife with secondary, tertiary, and quaternary couples to pad out time to meet the long run time demands of the airing schedule. When you’re adapting a fairly simple story, you either have to add depth or bloat. Oftentimes we get both. In the case of Heesu, it’s clear that they were only adapting the first season of the webtoon, and so they added depth.

The constant refrain from detractors of this webtoon is that it deprioritized the queer characters and their narrative in favor of straight narratives. I wholeheartedly disagree. Every single straight story in this show (and the gay ones) are meant to add context to the queer struggles Hee Su and Seung Won face, from Ji Yu and Chan Young to all three of his sisters.

Ji Yu’s music arc hearkens to the queer fear of being public with yourself and facing judgment and scrutiny. Chan Young’s tennis arc features real parental abandonment consequences that many a queer person fears. Hee Sin exemplifies how easy it is to fall for people and also deal with the constant rejection of most people not being into you (because they’re straight). Hee Jae exemplifies how toxic a relationship with your best friend can be when the romantic feelings aren’t fully reciprocal. Hee Yeong shows us what it means to be brave and face your friend after you’ve let them down romantically. Ho Sik highlights how easy it is for straight people to express and pursue their romances, and then be public with them. None of these plots exist in a vacuum; they’re meant to add context to the tension between Hee Su and Seung Won.

On the queer front, the show expanded on the initial lesbian advice plotline as a way for Hee Su to open the discussion about queerness with his siblings. The look shared between the sisters, their careful responses, and the way they treat him in the final episode after Hee Su comes out to Hee Sin shows that they talked to each other. Hee Sin clearly pulled on her prior knowledge when she insisted to Hee Su that she still loves him. Hee Jae, the grumpiest sister, was especially direct about praising Hee Su when he offered to help them take Hee Yeong to the airport. Hee Yeong told him plainly that he must remember that she is always on his side and will support him. Seung Won’s mom acknowledged that her own coming out affected him, and let him decide how open to be about his family.

The coming out sequence with Hee Sin was so powerful. He made it clear that this isn’t a gay-for-you situation. He said plainly that his crushes are on guys, and will probably always be on guys. Hee Sin’s response took me back to this incredible scene from The Fosters, in which Lena’s dad apologizes to her for saying “I still love you.” He rejects it as something horrible, in which you confirm to your kid that you could possibly stop loving them. He says he wishes he had instead said, “Thank you for telling me something so important about yourself, and I can’t wait to meet the person you want to share your life with.” 

I’m also annoyed about the insistence that the straights were given priority in this narrative in which everyone gets about the same level of on-screen intimacy. This is a show that managed to avoid getting an R rating, which means that it’ll be accessible to a much wider range of viewers without needing additional parental controls. The straights getting time means that when the gays throw the ease at which they pursued romance back in their faces, it’s actually grounded in events that transpired in the narrative. I will also say that I did NOT like the way Jiyu and Chanyoung meddled with Heesu in the webtoon, and thought conspiring with Seung Won was not kind to Heesu. I like that the drama instead uses their stories to support the queer themes as Ji Yu directly supports Seung Won.

I’d also like to say that all the Chan Young commentary troubles me. Hee Su has been in love with this boy for ten years. I actually think the show needs to spend time fleshing him out into a real person for the audience to understand why Hee Su likes him so much. He’s charming and friendly. He’s kind and thoughtful. He wants to help the people he cares about. He also trusts Hee Su implicitly. 

I do not blame him for being overwhelmed and surprised when Hee Su suddenly confessed to him, and I think there is real value in him botching that moment. So many viewers who might not have spent a lot of time thinking about how they would handle queer people coming out to them will benefit from seeing Chan Young flub that moment. What’s more important is that he did eventually talk to Hee Su and begin to repair the break in their friendship. It isn’t about being right every single time; it’s about always doing the work required to make things right. 

Finally, I really loved that Hee Su got to be mad at Seung Won for confusing him all this time. It was fun to see Hee Su, who I think was way out of line for always interfering in Chan Young’s life, face the reality that he had also been subject to that kind of behavior. This worked so well for me because we understood that what Seung Won liked so much about Hee Su was how warm and open he was. I will have more to say in the future about how many shows we’ve already had this year reject one-sided pining as inherently pure.

In the end, it’s just a really dissonant experience for me to see such a kind show getting such an energetic negative response. Like anyone else who’s watched over 300 BLs since 2016, I like seeing cute boys kiss each other and make face as much as anyone else. However, if we’re unable to appreciate using a webtoon with clear ideas about the difficulty of coming out when you’re in love with a friend in a format that far more viewers are used to, I don’t think I can rock with this anymore. I can’t even find myself associated with the kinds of people who would have called Degrassi homophobic because it wasn’t exclusively gay. 

[twig-tea]

Final thoughts and trying to organize my feelings around Heesu In Class 2.

It truly felt like a "regular," quality kdrama, except for one thing. One very important thing: two of the main characters are gay, and endgame. Like, I don't think we realize how unthinkable a (mainstream) Korean show like this was, just two or three years ago.

It might not be 100% faithful to the source material but it is 100% faithful to the story it sets out to tell. It had a clear direction from the start, hit the mark several times, and never lost sight of that finish line: @lurkingshan and @twig-tea put it very succinctly and pertinently when they said the drama had, respectively, "a legible narrative" and was "carefully calibrated."

On top of that, it has a great re-watch value with a lot of blink and you'll-miss-it details, and beautiful direction. A lot of care went into how the scenes are set up and shot and it shows.

I completely understand that some people might prefer a drama with a different, more "targeted" focus (i.e literally everything converging towards Hee-su narratively) but that doesn't mean anything else is automatically wrong/bad. I feel like you can find that elsewhere so easily; it's just not that kind of story. I also think it's such a restrictive way of looking at things... Gay romance does not need to be locked in the confines of your average BL. I don't want to watch the same arbitrary BL tropes being applied like it's the law. How boring. We finally have a high budget, high quality Korean drama with—I cannot stress this enough—A GAY TITLE CHARACTER that gets the same treatment a straight coming of age romance kdrama would... and I, for one, am delighted in, and celebrate the creative liberties they took. It was a risk, but it paid off.

It only feels like other characters take "too much space/time" away from Seung-won and Hee-su than they actually do because 1. the show has a longer runtime, and more episodes and 2. the show does not follow the "classic" boys love formula. Hee-su does not exist in a bubble where everything that happens happens only TO HIM. However what happens around him definitely serves to highlight his struggles, his fears, or his emotions in general. I'd go even further and say that not everything happening in relation to Hee-su has to be about Seung-won... Characters can exist outside of their love interests. It's one of the reasons the drama felt so well-rounded to me.

Hee-su is the hero of this drama, but the show does a wonderful job of reminding us the other characters are not NPCs, not puppets, not props. And they also are orbiting around their own centers, and that does not diminish Heesu's character or his relationship with Seung-won. In fact, the drama makes a point of underlining how extraordinary it is that they (tiny specks of stardust) could find each other (in the vastness of the universe).

I love metaphors and the cosmic theme threaded through the episodes was just the cherry on top. I don't want to focus too much on the criticism I've read for the show but I will admit that most of what seemed to rub people the wrong way is actually what made it special to me.

Yes, we get more perspective from different points of view, and we get to see the other characters struggle and grow up too, but the drama never loses sight of, or erase Hee-su. It's more like the narrative sometimes switches to a broader lens, and we have access to a wider spectrum of colors. Everything (Hee-su included) gets to feel more three dimensional. When ep1 and 2 aired, I said the show felt "full" but maybe a better way to put it would be that it's not flat.

I can argue about it ad nauseam, but the matter of the fact is Hee-su is The Main Character, and he's GAY, very GAY, and it's his story and his struggles being told. The actors did a wonderful job and made me feel so much. And it ends well!

It was lovely.

[twig-tea]

This moment we're walking together, hand in hand, how miraculous could this moment be?