vibes-on-the-fritz

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

On the topic of scars I'd like to say that yeah, someone else's scars might be triggering to you based on your assumptions about them, however your discomfort does not under any circumstances come before their bodily autonomy. You don't get to decide what other people are allowed to wear for your comfort, you don't get to decide whether someone is allowed to be out in public if they can't hide their scars. How you feel about someone else's body isn't their fault and isn't their problem. You can move away if you really need to.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

yes to all the previous!

another thing, you do not have to have a period at all.

i got very heavy and irregular periods for years before i realized that wasnt normal/healthy. i got put on birth control, but i still got horrible cramps and intense nausea every time i had my period.

then a couple years later i got diagnosed with PCOS. my endocrinologist looked at my symptoms and offered me the option of a birth control that just skipped the placebo (the type is called monophasic i think). i had not realized that was an option in the first place.

if you are experiencing debilitating period symptoms and birth control has not fixed it, ask your doctor about ways to not have them at all. you do not have be satisfied with "better than it was"

hey so it’s march now aka the beginning of endometriosis awareness month and i feel obligated to remind you that debilitatingly painful periods are not normal. if you or someone you know is ending up sick or bedridden every month, you are not crazy and deserve medical attention from someone who will take you seriously

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

there's probably a better way of wording the last part but like come on it doesn't matter if we're all the same to fascists

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

when i stand up and i definitely shouldnt i usually say "hubris" and then see how far i get before my metaphorical wings fall apart sending me into the deep sea (forced floor time)

To fellow physically disabled people I highly recommend saying PARKCORE whenever you try to stand up. Makes the struggle very epic poggers.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

trans people on this site pissing me the fuck off with their bullshit. i get it, everyone is scared because they have a damn right to be. but for the love of fuck, your enemy is not other trans people. you are not suffering systemically because of other trans people. none of us have the fucking bandwidth to be dealing with internal community fighting when rights are being taken away every day.

i hate seeing this shit happen over and over again. a community feels threatened, so they lash out. but then somewhere that fear turns into anger at other people who are hurting. and then marginalized people fight marginalized people until we all are in these neat little groups just waiting to be picked off by the same damn people that made everyone feel threatened in the first place.

we do not need to be fighting eachother. if someone says something you disagree with, scroll. if someone asks people to interact with them in a certain way, respect that. and for fucks sake focus on the people who are weaponizing laws and systems to hurt the community.

have a good day.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

to me, the universal trust in doctors from people who haven't experienced medical mistreatment/neglect is akin to the trust that upper middle class and white people have in the police. they haven't experienced the mistreatment themselves so they assume it doesn't exist. they assume that every doctor or police officer is only in it for protecting people. they assume that the people who made the rules for these organisations are somehow all-knowing and know the truth about what is morally correct for society. the difference is that there actually is such thing as a good doctor, while there is no such thing as a good cop.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

This need to move away from placing blame on identities is the driving force behind a theory im trying to develop (that i wont go into too much here cause like, this is probably gonna be my senior thesis) where language shifts from Identity Defined Oppression to Ideology Defined Oppression. Basically, shifting language of oppression away from an interaction of identities and towards systemic and ideological interactions. Cause like, trans people are not oppressed because theyre trans, theyre oppressed because of transphobia. And transphobia is not the oppression of trans people by cis people, it is the systemic devaluation of non-normative gender performance. Basically, yeah! Identities are not synonymous with ideologies.

[also sorry if this is hard to understand im used to writing about this in academic language. feel free to ask me to explain things more cause im deep into this shit rn]

genuine question: why is it so hard for people to shift their language from "i hate cishets" to "i hate queerphobes".

same amount of syllables. and then you don't have to sit there and go "well DUH we don't mean 'all' cishets we don't mean the GOOD ones." like you don't have to add an asterisk, here. just say what you mean. like forreal, just... say what you. mean. if you have to CLARIFY that you don't mean a certain part of that group then why are you saying it to begin with? why are you over complicating it and skirting around it like you're scared of making your own point?

are you really that attached to the conflict between queerphobic cishet people and queers that you have to reinforce it from your own side? are you really that attached to needing to hate something that you take it out on people who haven't hurt you. i've been hurt by many, many women- would you excuse me for saying i hate all women because of that? of course not. women can also be abusive, but that doesn't give me the right to hate womanhood.

it is so easy to shift the verbiage and have it actually mean what you say. unless you truly do mean that you hate the concept of cis heterosexuality, then i don't know what to tell you, but we don't do that here in the queer community. we don't hate people for their gender and sexuality. this is not the place for you if you want to shit on people for their identities.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

disabled transgenders in my cellular phone

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

exactly this. christmas is largely about family and consumerism, neither of which are things i enjoy. i feel horrible receiving gifts that i dont want, giving gifts that i dont mean, and spending time with people who have hurt me over and over again. i hate that growing up means growing away from the joy of the holiday

Can't lie I have a hard time with Christmas now that I'm older. Beyond the whole 'having to be home with my abusive mother and dysfunctional family' thing, a large part is the horrifying consumerism of it all. Like it feels more like a capitalist celebration than anything festive now

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

i met my partner because they complimented my stickers on my crutch. 4 of my best friends waited hours to see me in the er less than a week after we met. i got the courage to get mobility aids because my friends were worried about me falling when they werent there to catch me. my disabilities are a part of me, and my chosen people love all of me. i know this post is about romantic things [and i can delete if this is too derailing] but platonically this is also true. we disabled people are not a burden to the people who choose in our lives. we are people, and humans tend to love people they spend time with. love is not something earned by being convenient and palatable. loving someone means loving every bit of them.

anyway if anyone tells you that nobody would want you for being disabled they're a liar and not worth listening to. disabled people can be cute, attractive, and desirable. not "despite" being disabled but just for who they are. it doesn't matter if you have scars, or inconvenient symptoms or some visible difference. everyone is worthy of being loved

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

i keep seeing people talking about "antis" and "proshippers" and having zero frame of reference for what each group is. honestly, i think my life might be better for it.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

BREAKING NEWS

Local disabled person is unable to do work due to its disabilities. Parents are outraged! More details coming soon.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

i love (/s) the implications of that mentality. that if you need a specific disability aid, then obviously, it's accessible to you. like bestie, there are millions of disabled people who dont have access to medications, mobility aids, accommodations, etc. that they need. just because you need something doesn't mean you have access to it. and just because you dont have access to something, that doesn't mean you dont need it.

a cheap wheelchair is not always a temporary one. not everyone has the privilege of getting a custom chair, regardless of how essential it seems to you

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

Getting angry at someone for having accommodations is the equivalent of a 5’ 10” person being angry at a 4’ 10” person for being allowed to use a step stool to reach the top shelf at work when they have to just do it by themselves (even though they’re far more capable of reaching the top shelf without help, they get angry that the shorter person gets an advantage) and in reality, the person with the most advantage in society is the person who needs no assistance to reach the top shelf. You’re the person people actually care about, we have to fight for so long to get the bare minimum. Stop bitching about the things you don’t have because you don’t need them.

And because people (especially ableds) have a hard time with reading comprehension:

I am not talking about you if you have a physical disability or a mental disability. I’m talking about ableds (neurotypical or not) who think they need to have everything we have even though we barely receive enough to function, let alone stay alive.

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

‘we support all people with disabilities’ are you normal about people being disabled because of being fat

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

yeah you're "punk" but are you normal about deformed people?

[vibes-on-the-fritz]

[im going to preface this post by stating i am extremely dissociated in this moment and therefore may not be as clear as i would like to be]

im so tired of having to be ok. im in pain and its ok if that sucks. just because its not something new doesnt mean its not taking up mental energy. im dizzy the vast majority of the time and cannot stand without falling, and its ok if thats frustrating. i should not have to put a positive spin on my disability for abled people to be comfortable with me talking about it. i do not have to be ok with my chronic pain, even if its a low pain day. idk im just so tired of pretending like its comfortable to exist in this shitty body.

[this post is about physical disabilities, do not derail]