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OW

field trip to stark industries fic but it’s post-NWH and it’s peter community college class and peter’s first time back in the building after being forgotten.

and the building makes it very clear that AIs were immune to the spell.

bonus points if it’s an au where tony survived, and he’s very curious why his tech is reacting so strangely to this random kid

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I imagine him hanging there like cooked spaghetti

Loki, grabbing Peter by the back of the neck like a puppy: Who is this? He wasn't with you guys when I attacked you before.

Peter: Hi, I'm Peter! Nice to meet you!

Tony: *Panicking*

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Awwww chillyyyyy chilly boyyyyy

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my beautiful princess with a disorder

if i had a nickel for every time someone called me this i would chuck them all at your face

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Peter: *Changing the names of Tony's Iron man protocols*

Tony: Hey, Friday. Zoom in on that building over there.

Friday: Old man protocol activated, boss.

Tony: What the fuck did you just say to me?

Tony: Friday, alert the team that I can't fly because my suit broke.

Friday: Activating, I've fallen and I can't get up protocol.

Tony: PETER, WE'VE TALKED ABOUT THIS!

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Peter, counting his push-ups: 22, 23, 50, 70-

Tony: what multiplication table is this. Why are we jumping around?

Peter: wouldn't you like to know, weather boy.

Tony: what did you just call me.

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what were meant to be stickers for the call of booty event </3 still love em tho

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Pookie pokey pookie pokey pookie pokey pookie pokey pookie pokey

had a vision

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Me the entire first term at uni

i am nooooot locked the fuck in. im locked the fuck out. call the locksmith

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Pookie made me pasta once and I almost cried

I read an AITA post a few weeks back about a woman who liked having snacks in the bath when she's had a long day (a result of residual trauma iirc - the bath was her safe space). Her brand new husband of three weeks, a man twice her age who had no job, made her pay all of his bills and do all housework, and spent all day every day gaming because he wanted to make it as a Twitch streamer, had always been fine with this; but, on the day in question, had whisked her bath snacks out of her hands as she was on her way to the bathroom and tried to bin them, telling her it was time to 'break her of that filthy habit in his home'. She told him if he ever actually paid anything towards the house she owns outright he might get a say, took her snacks back, and had her lovely bath. He was since giving her the silent treatment.

(Obviously the judgement was an avalanche of 'NTA and also he's abusing you', which she agreed with, and decided to kick him out, so happy ending.)

Anyway I told my husband about this and he was outraged. "I would never do that!" he told me, furious. "I would find it adorable if you had bath snacks!"

Since then, every time I try to have a bath (which I only do as a rare treat) after about ten minutes there has been an anxious scrabbling at the bathroom door.

"Elanor!" he says. "Do you have bath snacks? Do you need anything?"

My answer is irrelevant. He brings me wine and poptarts. Now I have bath snacks. I'm a bath snacks person. Last time he was literally sleeping on the sofa when I went for the bath. Somehow this still happened. I now have an eager bathroom butler. How did this happen. I have never been so decadent yet bewildered.

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istg the only thing men these days want to do is spend the day with greg... and steve... and stu... and mark... and leighton... and chad

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This is how I feel knowing pookie is on tumblr and now I am tumblring

"tumblr's the only social media without algorithms!" "you can still be anonymous on tumblr!" "tumblr's so nice because you don't have to show your face!" WRONG tumblr is special because you can have 3000 followers and still get an average of seven likes a post. i'm doing stand up comedy at a packed venue and one person is laughing

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🙄

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WAOW

buckyyyyy :)

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THEY KISSED OMG

Always wear a silly hat to the first date ☝️

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