write-out-your-hearts-desire - Tumblr blog

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

A

The promises you made, so easily broken.

I did everything right, was truly myself to the end.

Nothing was corrupt for me, it was of my own volition.

Maybe leaving was your plan all along.

I'll cherish the 36 days we spent talking, awake at night, gazing up at the stars as if we're both truly connected.

Looks like I got played again..

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Human being

At home, working for herself, Building her life,

Brick for brick.

As if we didn't expect a sacrifice to come for us. Aren't we all prey to something?

Is she looking? Did she find it?

That Human Being.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Inhale, insert consciousness now... please standby.

Exhale.

Coating my insides like a parasite, leeching off of me as if I'm something.. I'm nothing now after all these years.

They're all clawing and chippin away at my psyche, no defense.

Seems I'm fighting a losing battle..

I'm down for the count, but how about you continue for both of us?

If I asked that of you, what would you say?

Been a minute huh? Jacob's not here, he clocked out.

Too much stress in reality so he drifts off into a world unknown to most.

The return to it all is pain.. is that why he continues it?

Maybe you can ask him someday. One can hope.

Make it soon, for you do not know how much strength is left within this one..

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Crawling back to me, drunk off the fantasy of me and what could've been. I'm not sure now is a good time to test me again. Afraid I'd never make it out alive...

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

My will is spent...

Breath ragged, arms shaking, legs weak. 

I struggle to pull myself out of this chair. 

Eyes blood red from these tears..

Crying out for your touch. Could you please hold me once more?

I crave your scent to linger upon me forever. 

Wishing that we had eternity to spend together, wasting away at each others

expense. Just a bit of give and take, least that’s how it started. 

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Real talk only

Just personal shit and poetry, which can really be the same sometimes but i guess that depends on the exact situation and the specific variables that would be present. uhm, also, Merry Christmas if you’re reading this. its the 24th for me at 1:45 in the morning. Im usually up late so yeah. 

if anybody wants suggestions for music, totally fucking hit me up. not upside the head with a brick please, i mean message me and ill post some song titles and artists, along with Youtube channels that YOU HAVE TO FUCKING HUNT FOR so i promise you, I’ve found that good shit my son. Not really sure what else to say at this point. no reason to keep reading you idiot sheeesh, and i really love how i capitalize some sentences but not other ones like im picky with my “Engrish”. 

there was more written but i realized i was being an ungrateful little bitch and i deleted what was typed as to preserve my own sanity, whilst looking upon ones own thoughts written out, you realize you sometimes shouldnt say that. maybe everyone should be forced to type everything so people learn to shut the fuck up instead of being douche canoes, for real though. damn douche canoes. well, fuck me, goodnight.

I love you all and please be safe this holiday. I hope you all get what your hearts desire because, lets be real, that’s why we’re all here. btw, most of this whole thing is a joke so if you’re seriously offended, dont be, you dont know me. if that doesnt stop you, then im glad you’re offended. eat a dick bitch. stay safe and stay savage everyone. 

ps: fucking hit me up for netflix suggestions. 

pss: no bricks allowed. 

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Fuck that

Okay, so here goes.

I sit here, rocking out by myself, enjoying the flood of emotion through these speakers. This is my training camp, learning to control all that controls us. All of what overpowers us. 

When I say “us”, you gotta know I mean you baby. At least, that’s what I would’ve meant. Sure is funny how things change. 

oooh, come on love, I’ll squander that moody spiteful shit. I’m just here for Mary Jane and some meaningful connections, be it guy or girl, I could love you all if given the chance. 

I’m one for loyalty and respect so please show me the same. No need to cause any unintentional bullshit in my life, surely the truth is all you will ever get from me.

Now, as the night comes to a hauntingly beautiful end, I come rushing back to reality.. find my self glued to this screen, endlessly typing while I bloody the keyboard I’ve been written on. This is my keyboard. I write this story, NOT you. 

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Can't seem to gather my thoughts. I can HEAR YOU SCREAMING! Endless fucking torture from you and your collective of dickweeds.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

What am I doing?

Catching my breath, please follow me. Avoid that spiral there young one. It could kill you. Maybe after strengthening my mind, I neglected my body. It would explain the unsightly image I present to you, bleeding and bruised. I'm curious though, was this my minds doing or my own arrogance?

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

S

Looking at you, I sometimes forget that the darkness lurks in your mind. As if such beauty could harbor destruction on that scale.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Lights out

Door busted down, lights out. In the span of 4 seconds, it was gone. All I can worry about is my friends, my chosen family. The lack of shared blood proves my loyalty. Who's gonna tell him I'm gone? Who's gonna tell her I left? How many times I said I'd stay? too many to count, I assure you. Unafraid of losing myself... scared for them to miss me while I'm away. All my aspirations wiped away.. might she pick them up out of guilt, or love. I'd prefer the latter. But this isn't about me, it's about those who'd be affected. The select few. My chosen family. I love you. I promise to look after you. You could say that's the promise I made. Bye now.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Promises

These, I promise. Tell myself what I'll accomplish, what I'll push through, forever afterward. These things I promise. Cut them off. You hoped I'd stay with you, Like I couldn't do better, how funny. I grew up, became wiser, and ripped apart all ties. That, I promise. A part of me will miss you, that's true. Maybe even still love you. The shit you pulled ruined us. I promise, I wouldn't be me if I didn't say these things. What promises have you made lately?

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Gimme a minute

I know you're scared. You collapse under it all. You retreat for fear of the unknown, As in its unknown why you retreat from me. Why you run from everything, is a mystery. Shall we try to solve it? You know where to find me. Find me living in my head, over-analyzing. Find me, please.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Sorry I was gone... here's a little something.

Everyone is so different and unique in everything that consumes them, I can't help it if I wanna be the thing they consume the most of.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

Ms. Riiight

I guess I've woken up... Thank you for that "Ms. Riiiight"

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

That moment when you're looking for what to do. Looking for purpose, as you silently occupy the quiet in the back of the room, forever lookin inward towards the lost and found, dreading the day you break away... Could i really survive without you? I guess the universe answered that by putting you back into my life. Something would be amiss if i didn't question the motives of those who surround me. Stay awake.

[write-out-your-hearts-desire]

I.. Wish i could show you what love feels like. Show you what i see when i stare at the blank look you proudly carry because we both know the truth. The truth is that i love you. The way the moon loves the stars. I could kiss you, the way the stars kiss the ocean.... This isnt what i wanted. This is why I'm not writing.. Because she stole what little i had left. Stole the flame right out of my heart. But, thats okay, because now its someone elses turn to light the flame again..