writetiming

[writetiming]

Middle School Crush

(my silly emotional slop)

let it go

they repeated like a mantra

but how could i?

the way everything felt so visceral

like a supernova

or being tugged into a black hole

you drew me in

wrapped me around your entirety

your stupid jokes

your incessant poking

the snacks we shared

knuckles brushed in the halls

chats over lunch

missing lessons in our heart eyed endeavors

and then,

it was over

no crying or screaming

no stories to tell

no red flags or even

a rose tinted glaze

just

what ifs?

it didn’t bother me until it did

when i saw you

and made a fool of myself

maybe moving on is best

forgoing thoughts of you

and how you’re now with

her

her brown locks

goofy childish jokes

silver rings

my friend

the person i trust.

with

you

the person i wish would go away

but i finally let go of your hand

the training wheels came off

i hurdled at the wall

wheels whirring beneath me

it hurt

the impact

but i realized i’d finally rid

myself of you

your eyes

your voice

your jokes

your personality

i let it go and

i felt free

even if

you

were just a middle school crush

you

captained the ship in my heart for far too long

and

after all,

the final stage of loving someone is letting them go

so while the impact hurt

my knees scraped and bruised

i learned what it felt like to love you

and learned to let you go

[writetiming]

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