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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

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Awww nooo, dont cry too hard 😭 my bad 💕

Sadly, Not Like That

Ship: Peter Parker x Reader (Y/N)

Type: Angst

Requested: Yes, by anon.

Words: 2 906

Notes/Warnings: SOME FAR FROM HOME SPOILERS. Sadness, mentions of PTSD(?). Hopefully, you guys enjoy this, let me know what you think!

It was surreal what you were seeing in front of you. People who blipped had returned today, they were coming back to the spot where they disappeared. You knew so many people who had disappeared in the ‘blip’ as they called it. Your mind immediately rushing as you list all the people you missed in your head.

You had lived on, gotten older and became as old as some people who had blipped which was weird to think about.

Your mind went to Peter Parker after a bit.

He was someone you liked before the blip, you wanted so bad for him to look at you more than just a little kid even though you were a kid. You guys knew each other a bit before the whole thing because you lived in the same apartment building and your mom asked his aunt to show you the way to the high school.

You both ended up going at the same time to school so you guys would walk and talk to each other even though you were quite younger than him. He was always so nice to you and you really fell for his nerdy charm. He talked about Star Wars a lot with you because you actually did respond to him with more than just an eye roll and it refreshing for him to talk to someone other than Ned because you were willing to learn and become a new fan.

A few months before the blip, Peter hadn’t been making it on time to school anymore and therefore you didn’t see or talk to him for a while. Some rare days he would make it on time and you guys would talk but he seemed so jittery that it was hard to actually speak to him.

He was always really late or really early so you missed him. You once tried to wait for him but you started hitting the mark for almost getting late and had to leave.

Now, here you are at school, trying to learn when people started coming back. The kids that were in this class who were gone were actually on a field trip so they didn’t come back in the classroom. You heard some commotion from outside and your teacher had paused to check on what was going on.

The door was opened and you all saw what was happening. Some people were on the ground, some were bumping into each other. There was a real crowd and you saw so many more people than you’ve ever seen in one hallway in the past 5 years.

The students in your class had made their way to the door to look closer and you joined. Then you start recognizing some people who were in the hall walking around, confused.

You recognized Ned and MJ in the hallway, talking to each other and you had to pinch yourself to make sure that you aren’t dreaming and are actually seeing them. You know them because they hung out with Peter and sometimes during lunch you would admire him, therefore, noticing his friends as well.

You saw some older friends of yours but they were the same age as when they left. You felt happiness course through you as you realized that it wouldn’t feel so empty anymore at school and in Queens.

Seeing the effects of half the world gone was really depressing as the noise was reduced and the people were gone. The once cheerful school was depressing even though they tried to do something to help the students from feeling the loss of their friends but they realized that everyone needed to mourn, even them.

School was dismissed as they had to reorganize according to the situation and it was all confusing for everyone. They also knew that everyone had people they needed to meet. You hurry out of the classroom and you are tempted to ask Ned and MJ where Peter is but you know that it would be weird as they don’t really know you and you weren’t super close to Peter.

Instead, you go to find some of your old friends that you missed so much. You were slightly scared of what would become of your situations since you’ve made new friends, bonding over your losses and five years of moving on time.

Midtown High had let students take time off to spend time with their loved ones. 5 years of death, they needed time to catch-up. You were lucky that your parents hadn’t blipped and so you spent the time with cousins and old friends. It was weird to talk to them as in their mind no time had passed but here you were, not remembering the conversations you all had a few days before the blip.

Now you are at lunch, feeling like the first day of school all over again as you see who’s in your new classes since they had updated them and sent them out by mail.

Peter was in your first-period class and seeing him again had resurfaced some of your old feelings for him. He looked the same, obviously and he was still the nerdy kid you remembered except this time he is your age.

You tried to talk to him a few times, giving him a warm welcome back and he looked at you weird for a second before you re-introduced yourself to him. His face filled with shock as he realized how grown-up you had gotten. You were really pretty now and a completely different person but he still remembers you as a little kid that he used to walk to school and sometimes back.

You continued to try and talk to him because when you were younger you thought he was so cool and so handsome, you really did look up to him because he wasn’t afraid to be nerdy which made you think that you didn’t have to hide your interests no matter how weird or dorky.

In the 5 years he was gone you went through crushes and for a short period of time, a boyfriend, but seeing Peter again with you being a new and grown person really got you thinking more about him.

You did become friends again with Peter through the next few months, you were hoping that maybe you guys could become more but you were still glad that you were close to him.

Your friendship with Peter was more than what you expected as you both would talk to each other about your interests, you’ve hung out a bit after school as well. It was still weird to him as you were just a kid when he left and now you were a totally different person.

You started to notice a bit through the few months how he would look at MJ though. He started to look at her a little longer and tried to make more conversation with her while stuttering cutely and you realized that he had a crush on her.

Your heart hurt as you realized that he still didn’t look at you like a girl but just as a kid. You’ve tried your best to flirt with him but even then he didn’t respond the way you wanted him to. You got the hint and it hurt.

You really did like him a lot because he helped you embrace yourself even if he didn’t know it. He impacted your life without meaning to and now he’s back to leave a bigger crater.

You thought maybe the field trip to Europe might change something but you see Peter changing his seat with Ned to try and sit next to MJ. He constantly looked at her and looked angry at Brad which made you realize that you really didn’t have a chance with him. You were always going to be just a kid to him but you really didn’t want to not try at all.

“Hey, Peter!” You sit next to him on the bus. Ned was sitting with Betty and MJ was with Brad so Peter was sitting alone. You joined in hopes of actually talking to him but after his short greeting, he didn’t even look at you.

“Do you have a plan for this trip? I made a list of places I wanted to visit, I really hope I get to see them all.” You cheerfully told him as you remember your list.

“Yeah, that’s nice.” He absentmindedly responded as he peeked behind his seat to look back at MJ and Brad. You frown at his short response but don’t let it get to you.

“Do you have a plan with MJ?” You swallow your feelings and ask because you know it’s the only way he’ll talk to you.

“What?” His head snapped to your direction and he looked at you. You realized you had leaned in a bit to make sure he heard and your body was close to his. He looked uncomfortable so you moved back to make sure there was a comfortable amount of space in between you two even though you didn’t mind the lack of it.

“A plan to confess to MJ?” You were hoping that he didn’t, you were praying he said no and that he was just being a concerned friend or he just didn’t like Brad but you knew it wasn’t the case because Brad was a sweet guy and you knew because you’ve talked to him a lot in the past 5 years.

“What do you mean confess?“ Peter nervously laughed, his hand rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away from you and instead started daydreaming. You knew he was thinking of her and you couldn’t help but stare at him for a bit and just think… what if?

“So do you?” You break him out of his daydream and yours to bring you both to reality. You were both here with each other right now and there were only a few minutes until you reach your hotel.

“Um, well- kind of.” Peter finally managed to get out and your heart dropped at the confirmation, You had the suspicion for a while but hearing it come from him hit you differently.

“Oh, what are you going to do?” You wanted to cry but you held it in and acted as you usually do.

Peter blushed as he thought of his plan and how he hopes MJ would react. His cheeks turn slightly pink and he smiles, looking down at his hands that were fiddling with each other.

“I’m planning to get her a special necklace of the flower she really likes, the black dahlia. She really liked this story of it and I researched a shop that had a specially made one. I wanted to give it to her in Paris, on the Eiffel tower because that would be really romantic, right?” He looks at you for confirmation and his nervousness started to show up again.

“Yeah! That’s really romantic, don’t worry about it.” He lets out a breath of air and relaxes in his seat after getting another person’s confirmation. You were much more helpful than Ned was and that’s when he realized and turned back to you with his eyes wide and full of questions.

“Wait. You’re a girl, right. You can provide me with some information to help me…” He trailed off as he looked at you. Your heart jumped as he looks at you with his big, innocent eyes and curious face. Then you realized that he called you a girl. It might not mean much to other people but you knew that Peter had just seen you as a kid, referring to you as such some times and the fact he was weirdly comfortable with you even though he has a hard time talking to girls also set it off for you.

“I mean, yeah I’m a girl… I guess I could give you some advice?” You panicked as you realized you’re going to help him get with another girl even though you like him.

“Do you think she likes Brad?” Your eyes widen at his straight-forward question. You lean over to glance at MJ and Brad and you notice her body posture and the space between them that was put by her.

She didn’t look at him longer than necessary and was just laughing at some jokes he said which was a natural reaction. Brad was obvious with showing how he felt and MJ was always harder to read but you could see that from what you saw right now that it didn’t look like she liked him.

You turn back to look at Peter’s hopeful eyes and you knew you couldn’t lie to him, you never would.

“No, I don’t think she does.” Peter automatically smiled and you both lurched forward as the bus stopped. Everyone gathering their things to head out.

“Thanks!” He said quickly before getting out of his seat and leaving all in a few seconds.

“No problem…” You spoke to yourself, sadly. You never thought you were gonna help someone you like get together with someone they like who wasn’t you.

The next few days in the trip had been eventful, to say the least. Not with Peter but in general. You were attacked in Venice by a water monster and you hadn’t seen Peter at all in the last few days as he disappeared or tried to get MJ’s attention. You guys had since then made a redirect to Prague and you still weren’t able to capture his attention.

You know you should give up as he likes MJ but you thought maybe you could change his mind, he just needs to think of you as a different person and not as the younger you that he remembers. Who wants to date someone they only think of as a kid?

You try and have fun on your trip but you also know in the back of your mind that Peter had his whole plan set up and by the end of this trip they will probably be together.

By the time you get to London you have nothing on your mind but to get to safety as each city you go to, gets attacked by some weird monsters. Thankfully, Mysterio and Nightmonkey had shown up to save the day but it only helped so much. There was still so much destruction around the cities and you hurried to get to safety.

You were shaken up by the whole event, yeah the whole war happened with the Avengers but you thought these threats were done with, at least you hoped they were. The returning of destruction made you think of that moment and remembering how easy it was for people to leave and maybe this time it was you.

The flight back home was mostly you still trying to calm down and chill out from the events of what happened. You couldn’t believe what you went through in this one trip, you never wanted to leave home again. To make matters worse you saw from the corner of your eyes Peter and MJ holding hands a couple times during the flight but you just tried to ignore it.

When you landed, you made your way out with Ned as he and Betty apparently had broken up and he was a totally new guy according to him. You listened as he explained it to you. You met up with Peter and talked to Ned about getting together with MJ, further confirming it for you and breaking your heart in the process.

Ned then left to catch his ride and it left you and Peter alone.

“Congrats on your plan working out, even if it wasn’t the way you wanted.” You spoke up in the awkward silence between you two. You knew it was mostly awkward on your end and that’s only because you didn’t know how to act around him. You can’t be mad at him because he’s done nothing wrong but you so badly want to be.

“Yeah, I’m really happy it worked out.” He smiled shyly and you didn’t want to ruin his mood but you knew there was no way else for you to move on if you didn’t ask him. You were already in a bad mood so might as well get it over with.

“Did I ever have a chance?” You cast your eyes down, afraid to look at his reaction. You know that he probably caught on to your crush because you were super obvious and you knew he was just acting like he didn’t know.

You thought it might help if he knew, maybe he’d try and see you in a different light but that didn’t work at all.

“I’m sorry.” You nodded as you looked up to him, your eyes slightly tearing up but you held it in.

“It’s okay. You can’t help who you like, right?” You gave him a sad smile and he returned it. You couldn’t stand to look at him any longer as he stared at you in pity. He felt bad that he didn’t return your feelings and you know it’s not his fault.

“Yeah.”

“Well, I should head home. My mom’s worried sick. I’ll see you later, Peter.” You give him a gentle wave then turn around and leave without waiting for his response. This trip wasn’t what you thought it would be at all first going into it. It left you traumatized and heartbroken but hopefully, it’ll make you into a stronger person… maybe after some crying and talking though.

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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

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Thank you so much, I'm glad you liked it 💕

Changed

Ship: Peter Parker x Reader (Y/N)

Type: Angst + Fluff

Requested: Yes, by anon.

Words: 7 587

Notes/Warnings: SOME FAR FROM HOME SPOILERS. substance abuse, some swearing.

Sorry this took so long!! I changed it up a bit and this is a new fic, not a part two for sadly, not like that. I hope you enjoy reading it, let me know what you think!

You saw how Peter looked at MJ. First it was Liz and now it’s MJ and it’s never you. You are Peter’s best friend and apparently, that’s all you’ll ever be.

Peter never looks at you the way you want him to and you can’t even blame him because they’re his feelings. It always hurts whenever someone would make an offhand comment about how you two would be a cute couple and he would just laugh it off, setting the story straight that you guys are just friends.

It hurts seeing that you were right in front of him for so many years and he still didn’t think of you as an option at all.

You realized this as he came to you again and again for advice with MJ. It’s always like this, the only time he would spend time with you is if he’s asking for advice on how to ask her out or how to talk to her.

It is always MJ did this or MJ said that and you guys hadn’t even hung out for fun anymore. You didn’t count stitching Spider-Man up at 2am as bonding time since you are freaking out for the whole duration of it, hoping that today isn’t his last day. That he isn’t one gunshot too far gone or had gotten punched too hard this time.

You are tired of just being on the sidelines, helping him with your whole heart while he is pursuing relationships with other girls.

It’s not his fault that you like him but it’s not yours either. You just really like him, maybe love who really knows?

Ned knew how you felt, it is impossible for him not to know as he hung out with you both so often and he saw how you looked at him and he saw how you got whenever Peter talks about his newly found crush. When he confronted you, you didn’t hide it because there is no point to keep it hidden from him.

You tried so hard to hold onto your relationship with Peter but then it just hurts whenever he disregards you to try and hang out with MJ or forgets he has to meet up with you and not show up while you wait only for him to apologize the next day or come through your window half-dead. He only remembers that he forgot when you bring it up and you’ve grown tired of his actions.

You had to step back and think if you are just demanding because you like him or if he’s just being a shitty friend since all he wants is to ask out a girl he likes and is putting most of his mind on that.

You had more friends other than Peter and Ned but you like to hang out with them the most as they appeal to your dorky side and you love being able to talk about that kind of stuff without being looked at funny like some of your other friends did.

You are only a bit popular in school and that was due to the fact that you are friends with some of the popular girls. So, by association, you also held a reputation. You hardly ever joined them when they invite you to parties because it isn’t really your scene but after being so lonely with both Ned and Peter hanging out less and less with you, you are reconsidering.

Here you sat on your bed, 2 hours after the time that Peter had said he would come at. Of course, he didn’t show up so you think maybe a change is needed. You are a teenager and deserve to have fun in high school. You didn’t want to be constantly stood up by your friends, you had other friends who are offering a good time at night and here you sat pathetically waiting for one guy.

Maybe it’s time for you to switch routines.

So that’s how you decided that you would switch it up and maybe hang out with your other friends for lunch from now on. It helps that you won’t have to see Peter stare at MJ the whole time or whisper to Ned on how he thought she looked really pretty today.

And so you did that, you sat with your other friends, ignoring the weird looks Peter gave you and knowing looks Ned did. He was expecting it any time now since all Peter is capable of talking about is MJ. He is glad you are taking the steps to hopefully move on.

“Finally, you’re actually sitting with us for lunch.” One of your friends, Megan, shook her head as she ate her lunch. You knew that they are really accepting of you and only want the best for you, that’s why you guys are still friends but you felt shy knowing that they are probably judging your old group.

You didn’t want them to put down Ned, Peter, and MJ because they are all really cool and they are your close friends but you couldn’t help but still feel a bit bitter towards them.

“I think I’ll be eating here more often.” You look down at your unappealing lunch, trying to choose what to force yourself to eat first.

“Did something happen with Peter?” Your friend from beside you, Eliza, had asked as she is concerned that some boy had messed up with you.

“No, nothing at all.” You pitifully said as you wish something had happened, maybe then you’d have an excuse to be mad at him but instead, the lack of attention had gotten to you. You pick at the dry food on your tray, wanting a burger or something else instead.

“Well, if you ever need someone to back you up, you got me.” She tells you and you knew you could always count on her. You have been friends with her for a while but because you didn’t have many interests that aligned, you tended to drift off into different groups.

“All I need to do is move on.” She smiles deviously at the comment.

“Well, there’s a party Friday night at Flash’s and maybe you should actually join us this time. I swear I’m slightly offended at the number of times you’ve turned me down. Don’t worry, I get it’s not really your scene but let loose sometimes.”

A party. That is exactly what you need right now.

“Well, I’ll take you up on the offer this time. I need this escape.” You smile at her as she starts planning on meeting beforehand, maybe having a sleepover at her house to have the full experience. She is excited that you finally accepted her offer so she started planning on what you guys are gonna wear.

For the first time in a while, you are actually excited for something.

Keep reading

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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

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Honestly I still dont understand how to use tumblr properly

#what is proper etiquette #rip #i really am just writing #thank you the likes and reblogs and comments

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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

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Hi can i can i request something like a part two of sadly not like that or another fic where you realize/think peter likes mj you kind of change and you become like the stereotypical popular girl who likes to party and you start to hang out with the bad crowd and peter misses you as his friend or he actually likes you instead of mj and help bring you back to who you were before the partying and stiff. Sorry for the long request also I LOVEEE your work btw.

Hey! Thank you for the request, sorry it took so long. Don’t worry, I love long requests and thank you so much for reading my works! I wrote this as a separate fic, I hope that’s fine and you can read it here. Let me know what you think!

#ask #request

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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

Text

Changed

Ship: Peter Parker x Reader (Y/N)

Type: Angst + Fluff

Requested: Yes, by anon.

Words: 7 587

Notes/Warnings: SOME FAR FROM HOME SPOILERS. substance abuse, some swearing.

Sorry this took so long!! I changed it up a bit and this is a new fic, not a part two for sadly, not like that. I hope you enjoy reading it, let me know what you think!

You saw how Peter looked at MJ. First it was Liz and now it’s MJ and it’s never you. You are Peter’s best friend and apparently, that’s all you’ll ever be.

It hurts seeing that you were right in front of him for so many years and he still didn’t think of you as an option at all.

You are tired of just being on the sidelines, helping him with your whole heart while he is pursuing relationships with other girls.

It's not his fault that you like him but it's not yours either. You just really like him, maybe love who really knows?

Ned knew how you felt, it is impossible for him not to know as he hung out with you both so often and he saw how you looked at him and he saw how you got whenever Peter talks about his newly found crush. When he confronted you, you didn't hide it because there is no point to keep it hidden from him.

Maybe it’s time for you to switch routines.

So that's how you decided that you would switch it up and maybe hang out with your other friends for lunch from now on. It helps that you won’t have to see Peter stare at MJ the whole time or whisper to Ned on how he thought she looked really pretty today.

“Finally, you're actually sitting with us for lunch.” One of your friends, Megan, shook her head as she ate her lunch. You knew that they are really accepting of you and only want the best for you, that’s why you guys are still friends but you felt shy knowing that they are probably judging your old group.

You didn’t want them to put down Ned, Peter, and MJ because they are all really cool and they are your close friends but you couldn’t help but still feel a bit bitter towards them.

“I think I'll be eating here more often.” You look down at your unappealing lunch, trying to choose what to force yourself to eat first.

“Did something happen with Peter?” Your friend from beside you, Eliza, had asked as she is concerned that some boy had messed up with you.

“No, nothing at all.” You pitifully said as you wish something had happened, maybe then you'd have an excuse to be mad at him but instead, the lack of attention had gotten to you. You pick at the dry food on your tray, wanting a burger or something else instead.

“All I need to do is move on.” She smiles deviously at the comment.

“Well, there’s a party Friday night at Flash’s and maybe you should actually join us this time. I swear I'm slightly offended at the number of times you’ve turned me down. Don’t worry, I get it’s not really your scene but let loose sometimes.”

A party. That is exactly what you need right now.

“Well, I'll take you up on the offer this time. I need this escape.” You smile at her as she starts planning on meeting beforehand, maybe having a sleepover at her house to have the full experience. She is excited that you finally accepted her offer so she started planning on what you guys are gonna wear.

For the first time in a while, you are actually excited for something.

Friday rolled around fast after you stopped trying to pry yourself into Peter’s schedule. You just let the days be and relaxed with other friends who actually gave you some attention.

You ended up telling them your horrible love life and they encouraged you to find yourself someone on Friday and you actually considered it.

Maybe it is time to move on from Peter, your lives are getting too different and you know that he couldn't fit you into his schedule.

Now, you sat at your friend’s desk as she took out her makeup, hair straighteners, and curlers. You joined her right after school to get ready because apparently, it's a 5-hour job.

You guys put on some music and just had fun while getting ready slowly. It felt so refreshing to be out of the depressing atmosphere that you were in, trying to hang out with your friends just to be ignored.

You can’t blame them for having a life outside of school. You realized you need friends for different parts of your life, while Ned, MJ, and Peter are great friends that filled your nerdy needs, you needed some classic fun of being with girlfriends and just enjoying life.

Don’t get it wrong, MJ is fun to hang out with but recently, you get a bit jealous of her because all you can think about is that Peter likes her and not you. You understand why he likes her. She is genuine with her opinions even if she is blunt and has a whole other side that cares so deeply for her friends and so you can’t blame him for liking her.

You need time away from all of that though, get your mind off of it. Maybe get drunk if that is an option, even if you know better you couldn’t care at this moment because everyone is doing it anyways… right?

You don’t put more thought into it and erase the thoughts from your mind and instead start singing along to the throwback songs that you and your friend had picked out. You use a hairbrush as a mic as Eliza straightens your hair while trying not to burn herself from both of your rapid dance movements.

You felt so light for the first time in forever and you love the feeling so much.

“Do I look fine?” You straighten out the bumps in your dress as you look in the mirror. You aren’t used to wearing dresses too often since you haven’t had a reason to as of recent, so it felt weird. Your hair is straightened to perfection and you had light makeup on. You didn’t want to go overboard as it’s not your style but being dressed up made you feel good.

“You look great! Trust me, at these parties people dress way more revealing than you.” You relax but not by much as you realize where exactly you’re going, Flash’s house.

“Okay, let’s get it over with.” You get a ride from her mother, who made sure to give you guys a speech about staying safe and that she’s coming home late so to make sure to text her that you guys are home by 10pm. Since you’re going to sleepover at her house with permission from your parents, her mother wants to make sure that you guys will be alright getting to the house yourself.

“I’m serious, no later than 10pm. Your brother’s home so he’ll be picking you up, keep your phone on.” Your friend rolls her eyes at the curfew.

“Don’t worry about it mom, I’ve been here many times already.” She opens the door to get out and you follow in her lead from the back seats.

“I’m your mom, I’m supposed to worry!” Her mom yells to make sure she hears it.

“I know! I love you, mom!” Eliza yells and closes the car door. You both turn to each other as you walk to the sidewalk, seeing her mother off.

“I’m going to text everyone to ask where they are.” Eliza says while grabbing your arm. “Come on, let’s get inside.” You follow her to the door, waiting as she rings the doorbell.

The door opens quickly and Flash leans against the edge. “Hello, ladies. Welcome to the party, have a good time but not too good, the bedrooms are off-limits.” He winks at you both and motions for you guys to go inside.

You immediately feel your adrenaline pumping as you hear the loud music get louder the further you walk into the house, making you want to dance and sing along automatically.

You suddenly felt an arm wrap around your shoulder and you stiffen uncomfortably. Looking at your side, you see that it’s just Flash.

“Where’s your partner?” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion making him add on, “Penis?” You roll your eyes at his childish nickname for him. No matter how much you tried correcting it, he didn’t care.

“Not with me, that’s for sure.” You both walk into his living room, where most of the party is held in. The living room led into his outdoor pool which has many people surrounding it with drinks in their hands.

“You guys fight?” He asks curiously as he took you towards the kitchen to get you some drinks. Quickly opening a new bottle of pop and pouring it into a cup for both of you.

“Nah.” You simply answer, not wanting to go into the specifics. Flash is a good guy but sometimes he also is just an insecure highschooler like the rest of the school. Not that it gave him an excuse to call people names and tease them relentlessly but he had his moments where he is sweet, at least to you. It’s a love-hate relationship, really.

“Come on, you can tell Flash.” He motions to himself while raising his eyebrows. You just roll your eyes at him, the last thing you want to do is tell Flash your problems and how you are just a jealous friend, coming here to let yourself go for a bit. He hands you a cup of Pepsi that he had just poured out.

“Don’t you have guests to welcome?” You ask and take the cup he offered you, taking a sip.

“Yeah but you’re more interesting.” You just laugh, knowing he isn’t seriously flirting with you, it’s just his personality.

“Good try.” You look towards the party and see your friends sitting on one of the couches. You wave Flash off and walk towards the area that the rest of your friends are hanging out in, them instantly making room for you.

“What are you guys doing?” Eliza sat beside you, her phone out and telling you to get in the frame.

“Taking pictures, duh.” You quickly squeeze yourself in and pose for the picture, realizing that these are probably going to go up on Instagram for your whole grade to see. Most of the teens having their phones out, taking snapchats or pictures for Instagram.

You can see how the people dancing in the middle of the floor are mostly getting recorded as they wildly dance, some of them probably drunk. You can see by their faces how they don’t care much about anything as they just wave their bodies around, not too close to each other where it’s inappropriate but just some innocent fun.

You take a few more pictures with your friends and they update their stories. You contemplate whether or not to give in and show off that you’re having fun, hoping maybe that Peter might see that you are capable of having fun without him.

You doubt he’d have the time to check his social media though. Even so, you decide to be a teenager and make weird videos of you and your friends and share them on your social media.

As the night progresses all of you had danced a bit, some of your friends drinking alcohol and separating from the group. You sat alone, still buzzing from the atmosphere but just chilling now, the party only getting stronger as the sky becomes darker.

You felt someone sit next to you and you turned to look only to see that it is Brad from your biology class. You have known Brad for a while as he was 5 years younger than you before the snap. In that time you were all gone, he had grown up and become your age.

You didn’t expect to see him at the party but it makes sense since he suddenly became very popular because of how well he grew up.

“What are you doing alone?” He asks politely, sitting a safe distance from you to make sure you’re not uncomfortable.

“Honestly, not a huge party animal like everyone else. It’s my first party in a long time so It’ll take some getting used to.” You tell him.

He is cute, you notice. It’s just confusing on how you should feel about him as just a few months ago he was a little kid and now he is a guy you find attractive.

He’s your age now so it’s not like it’s wrong even though it is probably legally since your birth year is still 5 years before his. It is just complicated.

“I get it. You just came back from the snap anyway, so It’s probably difficult to adjust. Do you want a drink?” He extends his arm, offering you a sip of his drink but you were cautious. You know Brad but you don’t properly know him and you aren’t going to drink out of a cup that you don’t know is completely safe. You knew that much.

“It’s alright, anymore to drink and I’ll have to pee.” You awkwardly laugh, cursing yourself in your mind. You are not good at this. You feel nervous as this is the first time in a while you are actually talking to an attractive guy at a party.

Are you hoping that he’ll flirt with you… maybe.

“That’s fine.” He takes his hand back, taking a sip of whatever’s inside and relaxing back into the couch. “I’m kind of curious about something though…” He trailed off.

“What?” You look at him as he gathers the courage to ask you a question.

“Are you and Peter Parker together?” Your heart sinks at the question. Why can you not escape his darn name? Everywhere you go you hear it, no matter how much you try and forget him, he keeps popping up.

You force a little laugh, looking down at your lap and shaking your head.

“No, we’re just friends.” Yes, friends. That is what you two are. Friends…

“That’s good.” Your eyes snapped up to meet his at the statement, confusion filling up inside of you. “I’m able to ask you out on a date then.” He answers your unsaid question as if he knew what you wanted to ask.

“Yeah, I guess you are.” You smile shyly at him, taken aback because it’s your first time having someone outrightly flirt with you. A complete change from you trying to do it with Peter for him to get a hint. It was a good change.

Your weeks went on like this, you went out partying more often, getting sucked into the atmosphere of the crowds and the loud music and the dancing, it helped you get out of your funk and your previously depressing life. You missed the quiet nights of just watching movies with people you really did like and conversing with them about your nerdy thoughts but you’d been so attention-starved.

Peter hasn’t spoken to you since you haven’t reached out to him and that drove you up the walls. You knew that you were the only one keeping the relationship between you both alive and now that you had stopped trying, there was no one to keep it up. Peter definitely wasn’t trying so why should you keep doing it.

The anger of knowing that you were the only one keeping this relationship going made you go further in the wrong direction. You started going deeper into the parties, eventually hitting the alcohol and then the drugs. You felt alive and calm at the same time. You didn’t have to worry about no one, not friends and not family.

You always made sure you were home by a decent time even if you were completely gone. You had Brad help you too as he would make sure you had gotten a safe ride home. Brad was actually helping you calm your situation, he was trying to get you to ease up on the partying life but it was too much fun for you to stop.

You like Brad, you really do but he was no Peter and whenever you think about that, it made you mad at how much you still care about him only dragging you deeper into your substance abuse.

No matter how much you try and like Brad, he doesn’t make you feel the way you felt with Peter and you both didn’t have much in common anymore as his interests evolved with his age.

Now, Peter saw all this happening. He saw when you first left their group and he did nothing to stop it. He knew you had other friends so he thought you were just hanging out with them for the day but then it went on again and again. He wanted to say something but when he saw you sitting with the whole group at lunch, you hadn’t looked happier.

After a few days, Brad started sitting next to you, really close and you looked so happy with him that it made Peter’s heart feel heavy. It was like an unknown weight had suddenly landed on it. You had stopped texting him, asking to hang out. There was never a dot next to your name in his recent messages anymore and he was afraid to think that brad was getting them now.

Peter didn’t realize how much he had missed you until you were the one ignoring him now. You would look at him when you both crossed paths and you would awkwardly look away. Your eyes look sad and then you turn to Brad and talk to him and they instantly light up.

He figured he felt sad that he was losing you as a friend and that’s what the weight on his heart was. Ned said it was jealousy and maybe it is, jealous that Brad was getting the attention Peter used to. That’s when he realized that Brad was actually reciprocating the attention and not leaving it one-sided.

He was jealous that he wasn’t your friend anymore. That’s what it is.

He missed talking to you and just hanging out with you and getting advice. Ned was nice but he didn’t feel as attentive as you. He misses you knowing exactly what he needed just by his expressions or his antics.

He doesn’t want to admit that he lost you because of himself but it’s the only reason he knows why you would’ve left. Looking at all the conversations on his phone that were just you trying to converse with him and him giving you short, one-worded answers.

No wonder you felt bored and moved on.

He thought you were better off without him but then he would see you on random guys’ Instagram stories, dancing or doing drugs. They were never provocative photos or videos but he felt so hurt seeing you with all those guys, dressed so beautifully and looking gorgeous.

Were you always this pretty?

Whenever you two would hang out, you would be wearing cute baggy clothes like oversized sweaters and either leggings or sweats so the photos of you showing your stomach or bare legs made him feel… different.

When he looks back at his memories and photos, you looked so cute with your comfortable clothes on, your hair looking so beautiful against the light from the sun shining on it. You smiled really prettily as you looked at him in the photos you took with him.

He thinks your beautiful with your new style but he just hates you’re not with him anymore. He knows other guys are all over you as you have become quite popular. So knowing that you weren’t going to be watching movies some Friday night for fun and making commentary about them made him feel so angry at himself.

“Dude, just go up to her and ask her to hang out. She’s been waiting for that since she’s been hanging out with them. She just wants you to reach out to her.” Ned rationalized to Peter but Peter wasn’t having it.

“I don’t know about that…” He nervously looked away from your group when he realized he was staring too intensely.

“She only wanted you to give her as much attention as she was giving you. Just at least talk to her first and then decide.” Ned suggested. He misses you too and he has messaged you a few times to talk and convince you to try to speak to Peter again. But you were hesitant on doing so as you didn’t want to go back to the old routine of competing for Peter’s attention.

When you expressed your thoughts to him, Ned understood but he stood confused as he didn’t want the group to lose a good friend but he also knew you weren’t happy here anymore. He also knew that Peter needed to realize what he was doing wrong in order for it to change. He didn’t know if Peter liked you the way you liked him but he needed to at least apologize as a friend.

“Do you really think I should?” Peter looked at Ned, hopeful. He knew he should feel bad for being so selfish to want you back as his friend like before but he really did miss you so much that he didn’t even understand why.

“Yeah,” Ned reassured him and Peter decided that he should try and reach out to you. He knew you were happy but constantly getting drunk or high wasn’t good for you. He wanted you to be safe and you were out at the parties around these teenage boys without him to look after you.

He felt so angry at himself and so… jealous.

He felt so jealous that all those guys were around you, especially Brad. He was constantly with you whether it was at lunch or at the parties that he watched through other people’s stories and he didn’t like it at all.

He remembers the shock he felt when he opened up his phone one late night after patrolling just to check up on his classmates so he wouldn’t be too left out on stuff, clicking randomly on people’s stories only to see you in your revealing outfit, hanging off of Brad and smiling dopily as if you’re drunk.

After that, it was like he was constantly checking for updates of you off of other people instead of just messaging you. Ned was getting annoyed because whenever they met up instead of talking about MJ he started talking about you.

“Dude, you need to stop this.” Peter snapped out of his thoughts to face Ned’s tired face.

“Stop what?”

“Overthinking. You can’t decide between two awesome girls and in turn, you’re just hurting them both. Decide who you like and end this three-way suffering.” He didn’t realize how much he’s probably hurting you both by leading you both on, crushing your hope and then coming back to you after you’re gone.

He needs to make up his mind.

“You need to help me.” He turns back to Ned, hoping that he could help him decide.

“Help you with what?” MJ suddenly appears beside them with her lunch. She drops it on the table and sits down next to Peter.

“Oh, on what to wear for my…” Peter panicked trying to quickly think of a situation in which he would need to dress up for.

“For his aunt’s surprise birthday party!” Ned blurted out and Peter looked at him like he was crazy.

“Wasn’t that a few months ago?” MJ looked confused at the boys in front of her, knowing that they were probably lying to her. Peter turned to face her, hoping that this lie was not as obvious.

“Yeah but I'm planning for next year because I have to save up.” Peter let out an audible sigh when MJ nodded her head after thinking it through. Ned started up a different conversation with MJ, saving Peter from his demise.

Peter slumped forward on the lunch table as he thought about what to do.

He really likes both of you. MJ was so different, unique, and pretty and then you were always there for him, he was so comfortable with you and honestly, you made his heart feel so many different emotions all at once. He always ignored it but then he just realized that MJ doesn’t make him feel the same way.

You were so different from everyone and he didn’t realize how you made him feel a certain way until he thought about it now. He always was so nervous around you even after years of being with you but he was also so comfortable. That was why he took advantage of you always being there because he thought you’d continue to be there.

Peter started realizing that his heart had made up his mind a long time ago and that he was just an idiot. He groans and slams his head on the table in front of him, forgetting where he is and how it looks in third person. Instead, he just wallows in his feelings, scolding himself for being stupid.

Ned and MJ’s confused questions of if he’s alright just get ignored as he continues laying his head on the table in self-pity.

It’s you, he realizes. It has always been you.

Even though he’s realized this now, he still has one hurdle in front of him. How does he get you back?

How does he show you that he can be better and that he really likes you and not just because he misses you after you left?

Fuck.

You were back at another house, another party. Your days have blended together as all you’ve done is drink to forget. You know you should stop, a part of you is screaming at yourself for being such an idiot. Even Brad has gotten a bit annoyed at your new attitude and schedule.

You both were never really official anyways, you went on one proper date but other than that you’ve just been at parties together. He didn’t even ask you to be his girlfriend and he’s probably glad that he didn’t. You wouldn’t want to date yourself either.

He still made sure you were fine when you got wasted though. He knew that you were drowning your feelings and that you were going through a rough time. He tried to get you to talk about it but when you were sober you would never say anything and when you were drunk all you’d talk about was Peter.

He understood. You didn’t like him the way you liked Peter and he knew he was partly at fault for his hurt feelings because he asked you out knowing that you liked him.

At first, he thought you might turn out to like him but instead you decided not to face your feelings.

He knew you didn’t want any commitment, especially in your state. So he helped you get home or stop you when you’ve gone too far. It wasn’t safe for you to get drunk or high when you’re at a teen party. It’s a recipe for disaster.

“You know… I keep thinking that I should just talk to Peter.” Your voice cut off his thoughts and he saw you slumping on the couch, your head tilted back as you stared at the ceiling. You were definitely in a talking mood this time and he’s heard this inner conflict five times by now.

He still listens, providing half-assed answers. He stayed by you to make sure you’re okay but he realizes that you need to get better and he needs to move on as well.

So he does what he thinks is right and he knows you might be mad at him but neither of you is taking initiative to fix your relationship so, he does it for you.

“Hey pass me your phone.” You look at him, your talking halted at his request. You look confused for a second before handing your phone to him without a question. He had known your password a few parties in so he could text your family members to let them know you’re alright and on your way home or at a friends house.

He realized that they probably weren’t home often because you didn’t hide being wasted when going home and you always came back to more parties.

He took your phone in his hand, unlocking it and clicking on Peter’s contact. He sees the list of messages that you had sent to him that went unanswered. Looking at it made him realize how much he probably hurt you as his replies were so distant. He clicked on the call button and waited for him to pick up.

He’s seen the way Peter’s been looking at the lunch table you now sit at. His gaze was so intense. He feels Peter staring at him sometimes in class as if to ask, why you? He knows Peter has probably realized by now how much he misses and likes you and he’s not gonna stand in the way of you both.

Peter picks up on the second ring with a shocked, “Hello?” Brad sighs as he stares at you still complaining right in front of him.

“Can you come and pick up Y/N?”

“Why, what happened?” Peter’s voice jumped with worry and he heard shuffling on the other end as if to signify he’s already getting ready.

“Nothing happened but you probably should try to make something happen, you idiot.” Brad rolled his eyes before cutting Peter’s confused ramblings off. “I’ll text you the address.”

He ends the call and quickly texts Peter the address. The house wasn’t too far from the school so he wasn’t too worried about Peter finding his way.

“Alright, time to get up.” He grabs your hands, trying to pull your dead weight off of the couch.

“What, why?” You questioned as you let yourself be handled by him.

“You have to get home.” Brad guided you to the front of the house, towards the door so you both can wait in the fresh air for Peter.

“What? But the party has just started!” You complain, shifting your body to make your way back to the centre of the party.

“Don’t you want to talk to Peter?” You froze as you heard his name, making it easier for Brad to drag you out the front door as quick as he can.

“Peter is coming?” You asked with a shy voice. You didn’t know what to think, because your mind was a bit fuzzy but you felt really excited to see him after so long of looking at him from afar during lunch times or classes.

“Yes. We are going to wait for him right here.” He leaned you against the side of the house and stood beside you as you both took in the fresh air of the night. “I really hope you both get it together and get together.” Brad did like you for a while but he knew that this was not something to get involved in.

He really hoped you two would end up together and end his suffering of having to take care of you after you get drunk at another party.

“He doesn’t like me like that.” You smile pitifully at your own situation, you bet Peter was probably with MJ most of the time that you were gone. It’s not like he spent his time with you before that anyways.

“How do you know?”

“He likes MJ.” He had told you he liked her right to your face and even though it hurts you can’t pretend like it’s not a fact.

“Are you completely sure about that?” You turn to look at Brad, confused. Of course, you were sure why else would he hang out with her rather than you and talk about her when he finally makes time for you.

“100% sure.” You look down angrily kicking a rock on the ground. You suddenly feel more sober and the pain in your heart returns from weeks of subsiding it.

“I don't know about Peter but I can tell you this as a friend. Some people are idiots and don’t realize what they’re missing until they miss it and I can tell you that Peter looks like he’s lost every time he looks at you from across the lunch room. Like he doesn’t know what to do anymore now that you aren’t there.”

You didn’t properly stare at Peter and whenever you did look at him it just reminded you of the heartache that you were trying to avoid. So you only took quick peaks and then avoided him completely otherwise.

“What are you talking about? He probably just feels bad.” You try not to get your hopes up because that’s when there’s something to lose.

“I don't think so, he doesn’t hang out with MJ much anymore. He’s always looking at you.” You stare at Brad and wonder why he’s telling you this. Was he trying to get you to be hopeful only to crush your feelings when you inevitably find out that he still likes MJ?

“Uh-” You both get cut off from your intense eye contact to see Peter hanging at the sidewalk in front of the house.

He was in some comfortable clothing that he usually wears, contrasting what everyone was wearing inside the house. He looks like he didn’t care about what he wore but you always found him looking so effortlessly handsome and it annoyed you.

“I should go inside and you should go home.” Brad pats your shoulder as he moves past you to go back into the house, you nodded and quietly told him goodnight. The music volume increasing as the door opened before it was silenced again and the silent thumping was the only thing that was keeping the atmosphere alive between you and Peter.

You start walking towards Peter, not understanding how you were feeling at the sight of him. You wanted to continue to be friends with him but after you properly get over him. He was a nice guy and you’d be sad if he was completely cut off from your life.

“Um, Brad had called me, said you needed someone to take you home but uh- I don’t really have a car or anything-” He stopped as you walk past him and start your path towards your house.

You look back when you see he isn’t following you, “Peter, I know. Now come on.” Peter explaining himself to you felt so weird because you automatically always knew everything about him and the fact that he thought he had to explain to you that he didn’t have a car made you feel sad.

Peter quickly caught up to you and you both silently walked together as you made your way back home. The sky had gotten pretty dark and the street lights were on. You were glad it was pretty dark because it felt more comforting.

You knew Peter had wanted to say something to you. He kept moving to pick at his fingernails and then put his hands in his pockets when he realized what he was doing only to subconsciously pick at his nails again. After a few minutes of walking and only a bit farther to walk to get home, you got annoyed at his silence.

“What?” You stop and look at him. Peter stops in surprise, looking at you with wide eyes. The brown really showing as the street light is shining down on him.

“What?” He asks confused wondering if he accidentally did something wrong.

“What do you want to say to me?” You cut to the chase, not having the patience to have this silent conversation with Peter anymore. You needed to hear Peter straight up and have him tell you what he wants.

“Why do you think I have something to say?” Peter looks down as he thinks about what to say to you.

“You're doing that… thing.” You motion to his hands to explain it. You didn't really want to beat around the bush and just want him to tell you what he wants to tell you.

“What thing?” He looks down at his hands and notices that he was picking at his nails again and puts them in his pockets.

“Nevermind that.” You brush it off, tired of him trying to escape whatever he wanted to say. You don’t know where the confidence of demanding something from him came from but you’re kind of glad that you have it right now.

“What do you want to say to me?” You stand your ground and Peter feels shy around you for the first time. It makes it worse because he’s finally realized the feelings inside of him and saying it to you is not an easy task.

“I just…” Peter started off, trailing the end of his words off as he tries to gather up the courage to actually say what he wants. “I’m sorry.” He lets out a big sigh and sees you about to open your mouth and puts his hand up to signal he’s not finished.

“I’m really sorry. I really screwed up because I neglected you.” You pout a bit because the way he said it made you sound like a puppy but you let him continue. “I should have kept my promises and if I couldn’t keep them I should've told you but most importantly, i’m sorry for disregarding your feelings. I never knew what I was doing until you started doing it to me. I always just have you around and I took advantage of that fact because I thought you'd just be there forever and I’m glad that you left me to make me realize what I actually did and… how I actually feel.”

Peter shyly looks around in the dark night as he knew the next words would probably change your relationship heavily. Even though it’s already changed, this will be entirely new territory.

“How you feel?” Your heart beats in excitement but also in fear because what if he tells you that he hates you and doesn’t want to be your friend.

“Yeah. I-I really like you, love you. I don’t know I haven’t figured out the specifics. I just know that no one really makes me feel the way that you do and I never knew that I liked you until I kept seeing you everywhere without me, having a life outside of me and it made me jealous because everyone got to talk to you and make you smile and I wasn’t by your side. It made me realize that my feelings for you weren’t completely… in a friend way.”

Peter looks at your shocked face and freezes up as he thinks that this is the end for you both. You didn’t like him, did you? Ned told him that you liked him when he was about to make his way over to you but maybe he had it wrong?

Peter panicked as a minute passed without you saying anything. He wanted to take back everything, erase the last 5 minutes of his life completely but you cut him off before he could say anything else.

“Wow. I- um, but what about MJ?” Peter guessed if the truth was out might as well just come out and say it all because he has nothing to lose anymore.

“I didn’t really like her as much as I thought. I realized that you made me feel so different from what anyone has and that MJ is smart and pretty but I want to stay by your side longer, I see you in my future.”

He bared his heart in front of you and just waited for you to tell him how you felt. It's your turn.

“You’re such an idiot.” You can’t help the smile forming on your face as you realize that… he likes you back. Peter’s heart drops at your statement, taking it as rejection. “But… I like you too.” You smile softly as Peter’s head whips up to look at you. His eyes hopeful, wishing he didn’t mishear you.

“You like me?” You laugh at his surprised face.

“Yeah, I've liked you for a long time you dingus.” You roll your eyes. If anything, you should be the one surprised. For so long you thought he liked MJ and now he’s here confessing to you.

“How long?” His eyes widen as he put together the fact that you were always there waiting for him to realize his feelings. Ned had told him that you liked him but not how long for.

“I don’t know? I guess it’s been a few years or something. Start of middle school, maybe?”

“Oh." Peter felt stupid. Here you were always by his side, supporting him while he was an idiot running after these girls who didn’t like him back and you never left. Until now, that was.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to feel bad. I didn’t tell you.” You knew he felt guilty for not picking up on it but he didn’t have a reason to feel guilty because you never outright said that you liked him.

“I was such an idiot. Here you were, always by me and I was always going after someone else. I don’t get how you would still like me after all that.” He pouted as he realized how much you probably went through while he was being ignorant.

“Well, you’re here now aren’t you?” You reach out and take initiative to hold his hands that were nervously picking at each other again. His hands were warm, contrasting to your cold ones. He held them a bit tighter and smiled at you. He can’t believe that he’s here with you in this situation and he’s so glad that he is.

“Yeah, I am.”

#peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #peter parker angst #peter parker fluff #peter parker #spiderman imagine #spiderman angst #spider-man #spider-man x reader #spiderman x reader #peter parker fanfic #spiderman fanfic #spiderman fluff #spider-man fanfic #spider-man fluff #spider-man angst

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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

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Next fic!

So I finally finished the next Peter fic I was writing, it's about 7.5k words and I just need to edit it and then I'll put it up. So expect it to be up on thursday morning!

#next fic #peter parker fanfic #just needs editing

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yeaaabudddy · 6 years ago

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Damn, same though 😂 this is why I write so much angst lmao