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#Lily evens potter x reader
luizd3ad · 5 months
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She's My Religion | Lily Evans x Fem!Reader
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷
Pairing: Lily Evans x Reader WC:8,636 CW: mentions of abuse, self-doubt, cursing, little bit of homophobia and use of homophobic slur, use of the word Mud-Blood (not used by reader), use of Y/N, Reader is implied to be a Slytherin but not directly specified, mentions of violence, death threats, It’s kinda angsty, but cute at the end. Author's Note: I’ve never wrote for Lily so I’m sorry if this is out of character or something idk I tried this is also the longest fic I’ve written I didn’t mean for it to be this long😅. Summary: What happens when Sirius Blacks little sister and Regulus Blacks twin sister starts to fall for the intelligent and beautiful Lily Evans?
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I made this cute little mood board idk I just love this tbh
⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳
Y/N Black had always been seen as the colder Black out of her and her two brothers and that was saying something especially considering her twin, Regulus. 
Regulus and her had been close their whole lifes. Their eldest cousin Andromeda would say they were thick as thieves. Always doing everything together refusing to go or do anything without the other. 
But after years of abuse from their partners and then it only getting worse when their older brother Sirius left she closed up, to the point of even icing Regulus out to an extent.
When Regulus made the choice to mend the bond between him and Sirius, Y/N made it clear that she wanted no part in it. 
In Y/N’s eyes Sirius didn't care, he didn't love her. She knew he didn't. If he did, why would he leave them? Why would he leave her? Especially with those people.
Sirius had always protected Regulus and Y/N as much as he could. He would take punishment, sneak them food if they were forced to go without. 
Eventually protecting them ment having Regulus go to The Potters with him when there was talk of an arranged marriage for Regulus.
Regulus left 12 Grimmauld Place during winter break in their 5th year, Y/N being left once again.  
At that point she'd separated herself from everyone who'd cared for her, admittedly it was mostly her brothers but also the few friends she and Regulus shared.
Sirius had tried many times to talk to Y/N but she never budged, she'd rarely spare him a glance. He was shattered, Sirius felt as if he'd lost his baby sister. 
Regulus took it worse not that he'd admit that to anyone who wasn't Sirius. He had hoped that she'd forgive them at some point and that she'd join them or at the very least understand why they left but she didn't. 
Y/N wouldn't speak, look, or even be in the same room as Regulus if she could help it. 
Regulus lost his twin, his other half, his life line and she didn't even seem to care. 
But she did care she cared so fucking much. 
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
Despite Y/N being cold and dark to those around her, she was smart.
Some would say smarter than Regulus, definitely smarter than Sirius. 
So it came as no surprise to her when the summer between her 5th and 6th year Y/N got word that she was to join the 7th year potions class.
Honestly she didn't care, Walburga was as pleased as she could be and Orion unsurprisingly couldn't care less.
But that's how she found herself being in the potion class the year above and being assigned partners with her. 
Lily Evans. 
Y/N didn't know much about Lily other than she was friends with her brother and his friends, she was smart, a Gryffindor and muggle-born.
Now Y/N didn't care for blood statues. It never made sense to her, the hatred that so many purebloods held for half-bloods or muggle-borns.
It all seemed barbaric and honestly a waste of time.
So, no Y/N didn't care that she was partnered with someone who was a muggle-born. 
She did care however that she was partnered with a friend of Sirius's. And it wasn't just a friend that he would see around and chat up with sometimes no, they were close friends.
This was going to be a problem.
“Hi, I’m Lily! Your Siris’ and Regs’ little sister right?”
Lily stuck out her hand for you to shake with one of the brightest smiles you think you've ever seen. 
You simply roll your eyes and dismiss her hand shake. 
“I prefer to be called by my name, Y/N, rather than being referred to as Sirius and Regulus' sister.”
Lily drops her hand and her smile falls just a tad, not enough for most people to notice, but you did. 
“Of course. I'm sorry, truly.”
“It's fine Evans.”
You say coldly, giving your undivided attention to Slughorn.
The rest of class was spent taking notes mostly with Lily attempting to make small talk every so often. You ignored her for the rest of the class.
You knew Lily was only trying to be nice but you also knew she was only trying to be nice so she could bring up your brothers.  
And talking about them was one of the last things you wanted to do.
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
Days started to pass turning into weeks, weeks turning into months.
You and Lily had been cordial.
You tried your best not to be completely rude to her since she always tried to make small talk and she was kind to you.
You actually grew quite fond of her over time but you didn't think that the two of you were friends by any means.
But you were acquaintances.
And you did like being in her presents.
It had been three months since school had started and Slughorn had announced that there was a project that was due in 2 weeks, right before christmas break would start and you were to work on it with your partner.
You sighed and looked to the side to see a smiling Lily. 
You weren’t upset that you had to do a project with Lily considering she was very smart and you liked being around her, but you were upset knowing that you'd have to spend time with her after class and knowing that where she goes her friends were not far most of the time.
Which meant there was a possibility of seeing her friends, which meant a possibility of seeing Sirius and or Regulus more than you'd like.
“Okay Evans we’ll meet at the library after classes are done so we can just get this done. Please refrain from bringing your friends.”
Lily knew what you meant by that, you were asking her to keep Sirius and Regulus away from you.
Lily chuckled and shook her head.
“They go where they please.”
Translation. She couldn't stop either of them, more specifically Sirius, even if she wanted to. 
“I see. I'll see you later Evans.”
You sigh once more gathering your things to walk away. 
“Bye Y/N.”
It always caught you off guard when she would call you by your first name instead of your surname. 
First names were meant for friends, yet she never called you Black. 
She only ever called you Y/N, as if you were good friends. 
You supposed that was just the type of person Lily was. She was nice to everyone unless they gave her a reason not to be. 
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
After classes you find yourself entering the library. You were expecting to have to wait for Lily but to your surprise she beat you there.
You walk to the table she was occupying, setting your things down.
Once she notices you she looks up from her seat smiling at you.
She had a very beautiful smile, one that made you feel your heart skip a beat for a moment. But you chose to ignore the feeling, deciding, hoping, it meant nothing. 
“How were your classes Y/N?”
Lily asked with genuine curiosity in her eyes. 
Did she actually care? She couldn't possibly care about my day. No, she didn't care, she was just asking to be polite. That was all. You tried to convince yourself.
“It was fine… How about you?”
Lily then went on about her day. She told you her favorite thing she learned that day, a joke her friend Mary told her that made you actually crack a small smile. 
You couldn't help but hold on to every word that came out of her mouth. 
Without you even realizing it Lily talking was easily becoming your favorite part of the days that followed.
You spent every day that week meeting with Lily at the library and you realized you actually really liked spending time with her. She had managed to make you smile a few times which was a rare sight.
Lily had this light to her that you couldn't describe. She was just everything good in the world. 
She was funny, smart, sweet, kind, beautiful and you wanted to spend every moment you could with her. 
You realized as the weekend grew closer you wouldn't have a reason to see her for two days. That bothered you and you couldn't figure out why. 
The two of you were working late in the back of the library. The library was practically empty.
“There's a Hufflepuff party tomorrow night. Are you going?”
“No. Parties aren't really something I enjoy. I’m assuming it’s safe to assume you're going?”
You say giving Lily a small smile.
“Yeah. We're all going… you should come.”
You knew what she meant. Sirius and most likely Regulus were going to be there.
Over the week of working with her she would make little suggestions now and then about seeing or talking to your brothers without blatantly saying so.
You just shook your head looking down at the table.
“I'm okay, thank you for the invitation.”
“Okay well, I'm going to Hogsmeade on sunday. Usually no one comes with me since they're all hungover. Would you like to join me?”
You felt yourself stop breathing. You didn't know why you felt this way. 
It was just Lily, but you've never spent time with Lily outside of an academic setting. 
Was this for the project? Or were you supposed to hang out as friends? Or was it.. More?
Did you want it to be more?
Before you have the chance to answer or contemplate further, your conversation was interrupted.  
“Oi, Black! Three blood traitors wasn’t enough for your line? You decided to become one yourself?”
Avery said, making Mulciber laugh. 
You look up at them about to get up but Lily grabs and squeezes your hand telling you to let it go. 
So you did.
“Aww isn't that cute? You’re shagging the Mud-blood now? Merlin your whole family is full of a bunch of fuckin’ poof-”
Before he can finish his sentence you have him on the ground holding his nose. You felt what some people would refer to as ‘The Black Family Madness’ cloud your mind. 
You thought it was just pure fucking anger, but what did you know?
You look down at Avery while having your wand pointing at Mulciber to keep him where he is, not showing any emotion on your face.
“I could kill you, you know? I could kill both of you. Make it look like self defense. ‘Oh i was so scared they cornered me and I- I didn't know what to do. I was scared for my life'.”
You say the last part in a mocking tone you then crouch in front of Avery looking him dead in the eyes.
“No one would even blink if you two died. Did you know that? I won't do it though because I refuse to risk myself being thrown in Azkaban. Especially for the likes of you, do you know why? It’s simple really, both of your lives put together don't even measure up to mine alone in terms of importance.”
You stand up straight looking at both of them.
“Now you're going to apologize to Evans for caller her such a vile and disgusting name, and if you don’t I will have a letter send to my mother by the end of the night about how I walked in on you two shoving your tongues down each other's throats and how I ‘just don't know what to do!’ and then we can see how your fathers react to just the idea of having ‘poofs’ inside they're line.”
You give them a small smirk while Avery and Mulciber look at each other debating if they're willing to have a rumor like that go around especially since it was a lie.
“And if you think my mother won't believe me. I reassure you, she will. Why would I lie? It wouldn’t benefit me as far as she's concerned and I am as close to a ‘perfect’ child as she'll ever get and if it comes out that the two of you might be shagging then the dirty looks get taken off The Black Family’ and move to The Mulcibers’ and The Averys’. So let's play this one smart boys.”
That seemed to convince Avery enough that he stands up and looks at Lily and forces out an ‘I’m sorry.’ 
Mulciber is a little more hesitant. You send a Stinging Jinx Mulcibers way, he falls to his knees with a small hiss and looks at Lily.
“I'm sorry Evans, really really sorry.”
Mulcibers cried out
“Now. You're both going to leave Evans alone. You are going to keep her name and both of my brothers' names out of your mouths. Am I understood?”
You say with no emotion on your face once again. 
They both let out quiet ‘yes’s’ while scrambling to leave.
After the ‘Madness’ had cleared from your mind it hit you what you did. You didn't feel bad about what you did but you realize you did it all in front of Lily. 
You don't even look at her as you start to gather your things.
“I’m sorry Evans, really. I-I should go.”
You ramble out while trying to walk away. Lily grabs your arm stopping you in your tracks.
“I won't lie and say I agree with what you did, but I don't blame you. I also appreciate you standing up for me. I'm not mad or scared of you Y/N.”
“I should have never done that in front of you. I'm sorry, really.”
“It's okay. I promise. Lets stop working tonight, yeah?”
You nod at Lily.
“Yeah. Okay” 
“So about Hogsmeade?”
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
You were sitting by the entrance of Hogwarts looking down playing with the matching serpent ring that Regulus had got for you and him a few birthdays ago. 
You've never taken it off.
You were just wearing some plain jeans and a jumper you had stolen from Sirius years ago. You find yourself wearing it when you think you might need moral support and you didn't know why but you felt a need to wear it today.
No matter how hurt you might be from your brothers leaving, you still loved them so much. You didn't necessarily blame them for leaving the house or the family, you just wish they were still with you.
You’re taken out of your thoughts when you hear footsteps coming your way. 
You look up and forget how to breathe for a moment. 
There she was. Lily fucking Evans walking towards you she was wearing a white long sleeve shirt and a plaid skirt it was so simple but she looked amazing.
Why are you feeling like this? Why does it feel like every time you're in her presents you feel like you can't breathe?
You've never felt this way before.
“Hey Y/N ready to go?”
“Yes.”
You felt like your words were stuck in your throat. 
She was just so fucking beautiful. 
You didn't talk much on your walk to Hogsmeade. You were too caught up in your head and Lily had noticed that.
“Are you okay Y/N?”
“Yes, I'm fine. How was your party last night?”
You asked, trying to change the subject. LIly knew what you were doing and she let you get away with it.
“It was actually a lot of fun. It would have been a lot more fun if you were there.”
Lily said, sending you a smile. 
You just rolled your eyes playfully with a small smile of your own, letting Lily go on about the things that happened. She told you everything that had happened as if she didn't want you to feel left out. You didn't realize how much a little act like that could make your heart speed up a bit.
By the time you had gotten to Hogmaede Lily was laughing at a story about something her friend Marlenne had done, you were just smiling. Whether you were smiling at the story or at her laugh you didn't know and you didn't want to think about it. You just wanted to enjoy the time with her.
At some point Lily grabbed your hand holding it as you went through multiple shops, you tried not to pay too much attention to how her hand felt in yours. There were a few disagreements here and there when you insisted on paying for the things she wanted.
She in her words 'didn't want you to waste your money’ and you just responded with ‘it's not a waste if it's you.’
She finally stopped fighting you after you told her that you loved spending money on things you knew your mother and father wouldn't agree with. It was one of your little acts of rebellion. Which was true but a part of you also just wanted to spoil her.. But she didn't have to know that.
By the time you two had gotten back to the castle it was almost dark. You walked Lily to the Gryffindor tower still holding her hand.
“You know you could come in right? They want to see you.”
Lily said, squeezing your hand gently to reassure you.
Since the school year started and you wouldn't talk to Regulus he stopped coming down to the dungeons if he could help it, he started to stay in the Gryffindor tower. So other than the few classes you shared and the occasional glances across the great hall you haven't seen your twin in months.
It killed a part of you but you were still so angry and hurt.
“Me and you both know that's not a good idea.”
You said looking down. Lily was about to disagree when the portrait opened out walking James Potter, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and last but not least both of your brothers. 
You could hear a pin drop in the corridor outside of the Gryffindor common room.
Sirius and Regulus stare at you without saying a word. No one moves, no one says anything.
You look back at Lily with your jaw clenched and drop her hand, putting your hands in your pockets. You didn't miss the hurt that flashes through her eyes but you didn't focus on it. You just had to get out of there.
“I'll see you later Evans, Yeah?”
You say to Lily mustering up a very small smile at her so she knew you were not upset with her. 
You started to walk away not even acknowledging the presents of anyone else. You do your best to keep walking away ignore the sound of talking down the hall, trying your best to not spare your brothers another glance
You just weren't ready to talk to them and you didn't even know if they actually wanted to talk to you.
So you just continue walking to the dungeons 
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
The next day Lily rushed into potions class, saying how sorry she was and explaining that she didn't know that was going to happen. It was all just poor timing.
All you could do was smile at her and reassure her that you didn't blame her.
You knew she wouldn't do something like that to you,
As the days passed by getting closer to the middle of the week you and Lily continued to get closer. You both would still meet up after classes in the library to finish up your project, the project that you both knew you could have finished, days ago.
You were coming to expect that you possibly had feelings for the girl but you knew she most likely just saw you as a friend.
You both were packing up for the night, you had finally finished with your project with two days to spare. It was a bittersweet moment.
“Y/N, what are you doing tonight?”
You looked up confused but you had a spark of hope in your chest.
“Nothing, probably go to my dorm, read, sleep… Why?”
“I have rounds tonight till 8:30. Do you want to meet after?”
“Um.. Okay? Yes, I'd like that. Um where should we meet?”
Lily then gave you one of her breath taking smiles obviously excited that you agreed.
“I'll come get you after I'm down, just meet me in front of the dungeons around 9?”
“Okay, Yeah.”
You were caught off guard when Lily walked over to you and hugged you.
The only people to have hugged you were your brothers and even then it had been years. You didn't know what to do for a moment so after some hesitation you hugged her back.
You felt her relax into you for a moment. You could smell her perfume, Strawberries and vanilla.
You reluctantly pulled away after a moment. You could see a light blush on her face and you couldn't imagine that you were any better.
“I'll see you later Evans.”
You say giving Lily a small smile and walking away with your things in hand.
Once you left the library you all but ran to your dorm. Your thoughts consume you.
That was a friend hug right? It had to be. Lily was just nice like that. Are friend hugs supposed to last that long though? You wouldn't know you wouldn't ever let anyone you were friends with hug you.
So then why did you let Lily hug you?
Why did you want to do it again?
Before you knew it it was 8:55 and you were waiting in front of the dungouse. You were still over thinking the hug.
Why was something so simple as a hug throwing you off? It didn't make sense.
You continued to think while absentmindedly playing with your ring. You were so lost in thought that you didn't even notice Lily till she put her hand on yours, stopping you from fidgeting.
You look at her and smile slightly.
“Where exactly are we going Evans?”
You ask, raising an eyebrow.
“Now why would I tell you that? Come on.”
Lily gave you a smirk and grabbed you hand leading you to wherever she was taking you. You couldn't help but blush at her holding your hand but you didn't pull away or protest it.
You let out a little chuckle when you finally realized where Lily was leading you.
“Really Evans? The astronomy tower? Seems a little cliché doesn’t it?”
You say with a teasing voice all Lily does is roll her eyes at you as you make it to the top of the tower.
When you get there you see that a few blankets and pillows are lying out.
You just blush again and Lily drags you over and has you sit with her in the pile of blankets and pillows.
“So why here?”
You ask leaning back on your hands.
“It’s just one of my favorite places. I like the stars.”
She says with a little shrug.
“Do you know about Cassiopeia?”
You ask, looking at her as she looks into the sky. Lily just shrugs and looks at you.
“Admittedly I’m not very good at astronomy. I would usually have… um Sirius do my work.”
Lily says looking scared that just mentioning your brother will have you running for the hills.
“Cassiopeia was the queen of Ethiopia; she was married to King Cepheus. One day she had angered Poseidon, she claimed that her and her daughter, Andromeda were more beautiful than the daughters of Nereus. So the sea nymphs, Nereids, asked Poseidon to send a monster to destroy King Cepheus's coast. To appease the monster, Cassiopeia and Cepheus chained Andromeda to a rock as a sacrifice, Perseus rescued Andromeda, but Poseidon still punished Cassiopeia, he took her and hung her in the heavens. Cassiopeia sits on her throne, but during part of the year, she appears upside down in the sky.”
Lily looks at you slightly shocked.
“How do you just know that?”
You chuckle and shake your head lightly.
“Evans, I’m a Black. It’s basically a requirement to know about the stars.”
“Okay fine, tell me about that one.”
She says point at a random constellation.
You tell her about every constellation or star she points at for a while, not noticing that the two of you have subconsciously been moving closer and closer. Eventually your shoulders are touching hands brushing against each other every so often. 
“Okay how about that one?”
She pointed at one of the clusters of stars you hoped she wouldn’t have pointed out.
Then again it was bound to happen.
“Canis Major the ‘great dog’ it’s built around Sirius, the Dog Star, the brightest star in the sky.”
You say looking down, playing with the ring on your finger.
There’s a silence for a moment, it’s not awkward but not necessarily comfortable either.
“They miss you, you know?”
Lily says, looking at you.
“I don’t want to talk about this right now.”
You say not looking at her at all.
A part of you knew you couldn’t look at her because if you did you’d tell her anything she wanted to know.
“They really do. Sirius and Regulus ask me how you're doing all the time Y/N.”
Lily says grabbing your hand to stop you from playing with your ring once again.
“Lily please.”
You say looking up at her. 
Your breath gets stuck in your throat for a moment once you realize how close the two of you are.
You're so caught up in the moment, so captivated by the most beautiful pair of green eyes you've ever seen that you didn't even notice.
You didn't even notice that you called her Lily. Not Evans. 
Just Lily.
“You know you have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen?”
Lily says, staring at your eyes.
“Funny. I was thinking the same thing.”
You said with a new found confidence. Lily looks down at your lips for a moment and then you both start to lean in slowly.
“Ooooo naughty naughty.”
You both jump at the sound of the most annoying Poltergeist known to man.
After a few minutes of Lily somehow convincing Peeves to not tell on us for being there. You found yourself walking Lily to the Gryffindor common room hand in hand for the second time in a week.
“I hope you had fun tonight, I’m sorry Peeves kinda ruined the night.”
Lily said, stopping in front of the entrance to her common room.
“It's not your fault. You didn't know he would be there. I still had a good time.”
She just smiled at you, not letting go of your hand. 
“I had a lot of fun too.”
You desperately didn't want the night to end but you didn't know how to express that. You weren't blind you could tell Lily most likely had some kind of feelings for you. There was just a part of you that was still so scared of being rejected or left.
“It's getting late so we should go to bed.”
You say ruining your thumb over her knuckles.
“What if I said I didn't want to go to bed yet?”
Lily said, stepping closer to you. 
You just smile and let out a little sigh looking her in the eyes.
“I would then say that as much as I don't want this night to end, we've already been caught once and it's late, we have class tomorrow and I wouldn't want to see you tired… though under different circumstances I would love to see you tired.”
You say to her while smirking at her with confidence that you didn't know you had.
Lily just looks at you speechless blushing more than you think you've ever seen her before. You then dare to kiss her cheek softly.
“Goodnight, Lily.”
You whisper while sending a small smile towards her, not waiting for a response you start to walk away.
This had been one of the best nights of your life.
 · · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
Even though you had finished your projects you and Lily found yourselves still meeting in the library after classes leading up to break.
You both had been more affectionate in your own ways, Lily had started bringing you little snacks and water because she thought you didn't eat enough or drink enough water.
You were just constantly holding her hand or hugging her when you got the chance. It didn't go farther than that physically but you two started shamelessly flirting more often.
Finally it was the day before everyone would leave for christmas break you had just turned in your project to Slughorn.
You were gathering your things to leave for the next class when you were hit with an idea.
“Lily, do you want to.. Maybe hang out tonight?”
You asked nervously while a faint blush took over your face. You don't know why you're so nervous. You had hung out with Lily so many times at this point, it should feel normal.
She smiled at you and nodded.
“Yeah. I'd like that.”
“Okay. meet me at the astronomy tower. Around 8?”
“Really Y/N the astronomy tower? How cliché.”
Lily says in a teasing tone.
“Hahaha, just meet me there okay?”
You gave Lily’s hand a little squeeze, sending her a smile.
After classes that day you got together a little picnic basket of all the candies and food that Lily had told you she liked at one point or another. 
You had gone and set everything up so you went back to your dorm to change into your favorite outfit. Finally it was time to meet Lily you found her eventually and smiled at how beautiful she looked.
“So where are we going?”
Lily asked as you walked up to her.
“Wouldn't you like to know?”
You say sending her a small smirk as she rolled her eyes.
“Yes I actually would.”
“You'll find out soon, calm down.”
You say grabbing her hand and leading her up to the third floor of the astronomy tower, you then let go of Lily’s hand walking in front of the blank wall while Lily looks at you curiously. 
Soon the door for the Room of Requirements appears and the look Lily gives you is priceless.
“Is this the Room of Requirement?”
You nod while opening the door for her.
“Yeah. I found it in my third year. It's my own little part of the school, where no one can bother me unless I let them. You're the first person I've brought here.”
The room is full of books and a big fireplace with large comfy couches and a record player with all your favorite records next to it.
Next to the fireplace is the little picnic you had set up. Lily lets out a soft gasp as she sees the set up.
You both sit down and look at each other for a while. It's a soft moment, it feels like you both just needed to take each other in for a moment.
“So it's your last christmas here. Are you going home?”
You ask, taking a bite of a chocolate wand after.
“No. We all decided to stay here for our last christmas. Are you staying?”
“Yes. I'd rather spend Christmas in the dungeons then go back to Grimmauld Place.”
You say shaking your head with a sigh.
“Y/N, I know you try to avoid talking about this but just hear me out and if you don't want to talk about it after, I will leave it be, okay?”
You sigh already knowing where this conversation is going but you decided to hear Lily out anyway. You nod your head letting her know that she can continue.
“You said it yourself. This is mine and Sirius’s last Christmas at Hogwart. This is probably the last chance the three of you have to spend a Christmas together. They miss you Y/N, honestly they do. My sister doesn't talk to me anymore because I'm a witch and I miss her everyday. I don't want to see you go through that. I don't want you to regret not seeing your brother when you had the chance.”
You take a moment to think about it. You already knew if you didnt make up with them soon you'd regret it. Hell you already regretted it. 
You remembered how heartbroken Narcissa was when she found out that Andromeda had a baby. Narcissa knew she would never be able to meet her niece. You didn't want that. You didn't want your brothers to have families and you not be involved. You knew that if you didnt get over this pettiness that there was a large possibility that that was exactly the path you were heading down. 
“Okay. when everyone leaves tomorrow. I'll see them.”
“Really?”
“Yeah Lils. You're right after all. I don't want to not be a part of my brothers’ lives.”
Lily just gives you a hug whispering how proud of you she was.
Lily understood how hard this was for you. She knew you were hurt even if you never flat out said it to her.But it was time for you to get over it before you lost the only family you ever really cared for.
You and Lily spend the rest of the night talking and laughing. For a moment you forget the anxiety that will consume you tomorrow.
You'll be fine. As long as you have Lily by your side you know you'll be fine.
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
You waited at the entrance of the Gryffindor common room anxiously playing with the ring on your finger.
Why did you agree to this? Were you really ready to face your brothers? What if they hated you? What if they wanted nothing to do with you?
You were so caught up in your thoughts you didn't even notice your favorite red head till she touched your hands stopping you fidgeting with your ring one again.
You looked up at her, the anxiety obvious on your face. 
“They want to see you. I promise.”
She gives you a comforting smile keeping her hand on yours.
“What if I fuck this up? What if I lose them for good?”
You feel the burning behind your eyes trying not to cry.
“They love you so much Y/N. All you have to do is try.”
You nod, keeping Lily’s hand in yours letting her lead you into the portrait of Elizabeth Spriggs aka ‘The Fat Lady’.
Once you walk into the common room you notice it seems uncharacteristically quiet. 
You look and see two matching sets of gray eyes looking at you. You take a deep breath still trying to hold back the tears.
It's been close to a year since you talked to Sirius, quite a few months since you talked to Regulus.   
“Sirius, Regulus.”
You say in a neutral voice not making eye contact with either of them.
There's a moment of silence and stillness, a part of  you considers running out of the room but before you can act on that though you're being tackled into a hug by your eldest brother. You couldn't help but let a few tears fall as you hold Sirius and you can tell he's crying just the same.
Sirius cups your face with both of hands after a few moments to look at you with tears streaming down his face.
“I'm never letting you go again, you hear? I'm not losing my baby sister again.”
You let out a little sob and hug Sirius again putting your head on his chest.
“Sirius, Y/N why don't we go somewhere with a smaller audience.”
Regulus said in all his stoic glory. 
“Yeah. Regs right. We'll go to my room, alright?”
You give a small nod to Sirius then leads you to his shared dorm room while Regulus follows behind. 
You honestly didn't even notice the other people in the room until Regulus said something.
It wasn't many people, it was just ‘The Marauders’ as they call themselves and Lily but Regulus knew you would be more comfortable with just you three and you knew Regulus felt the same.
Once you get to Sirius room you look at Regulus for the first time in months.
“I’m sorry Regulus. I really am.”
You say trying to hold tears back once again.
“You ignored me. You ignored me for months Y/N.”
You look down ashamed playing with your ring once more.
“I know Regulus and if I could go back I would but I can’t. I was just hurt. Sirius left and that hurt so fucking much but at least I had you. Then you left, and I understand why you did but then I was just by myself. It nearly killed me to be alone with mother and father.”
You said taking a deep breath.
“I told you to come with me. Why didn’t you come?”
Regulus said with so much hurt in his voice it felt like someone ripped your heart out.
“I was afraid. I was afraid that I was too much like them. That if I would have gone, I would have tainted whatever good you made for yourselves.”
“You are nothing like them. Neither of you are. I made sure of that. Y/N if you were like them you wouldn’t be friends with Lily and Regulus if you were you would have never reached out for help.”
Sirius says while holding you against him once again.
“I really am sorry Reg.”
You look up at regulus with your tear stained face.
Regulus’s eyes softened and before you knew it, Regulus had taken you from Sirius arms and hugged you tighter than you had ever been hugged before but you didn’t mind.
You both cried into each other's arms for the first time in years. 
Sirius hugged both of you and for a moment you just sat there in your brother's arms enjoying every second of it.
“So, you and Lily huh?”
Sirius says in a teasing voice. You pushed him away and glared at him.
“Shut up.”
You say with a slight pout. Regulus and Sirius just give each other a knowing look as you roll your eyes and scoff.
“I hate you both. Did you know that?”
“Nah, you love us too much baby sister.”
Sirius says ruffling your hair as you swat his hands away.
“Wait. Is that my jumper?”
“… No. You’re crazy. The Black Family Madness is catching up with you Siri.”
Sirius and you start to argue as if no time had passed. Regulus just smiles at you two feeling grateful to have this back.
You spend the rest of the break with your brothers mostly but also with the marauders and Lily.
You got to know them all. 
You took a liking to Remus quickly bonding over your favorite books.
You and Peter got along well enough playing chess together often, since he would insist on rematches because you would continuously beat him.
James admittedly was harder not that you didn’t like him but a part of you had blamed him for Sirius leaving for so long that it was hard to get past that and it showed. It wasn't until christmas eve when James had pulled you aside for a moment when you felt yourself grow comfortable with him.
“You know, you don't have to go back there right?”
“What do you mean Potter?”
You looked at him with raised eyebrows as he sat next to you on the couch you were now occupying. 
“You don't have to go back to Grimmauld Place. You could be with your brothers again, I already wrote mum and dad. They said they'd be more than happy to have another Black join the Potters. I mean what's another one, yeah?”
James said with a small smile, lightly bumping your shoulder with his.
“Are you sure? I don't-”
“Yes. I know. You don't want to over step or be a burden and I know you don't think you deserve it, but you do. Merlin's beard, you and your brother are just the same. I will never understand the treatment your parents put the three of you through. But what I do know is that you three deserve good things in your lives. You deserve so much more than what your parents put you through. You are worth so much more than what they made you believe you were. You deserve to be loved, to be safe and to be happy. Y/N you will always have a home with us, plus… I've always wanted a little sister.”
You didn't say anything, you just hugged James and nodded your head.
Off to the side watching the interaction between you and James was your brothers, for the first time in years Regulus and Sirius knew the three of you would be safe and they couldn't be happier.
They liked seeing you interact with the people that they’ve grown close with and getting to see you actually happy every so often was just a bounce. 
But your brothers weren’t the only ones who liked it. 
Lily loved seeing you interact with all of them. 
You seemed so alive.
She’d never seen you act like that with anyone but her. She loved seeing you smile and laugh. She loved seeing you and your brothers truly happy.
This was her favorite Christmas so far.
You had made it her favorite Christmas.
· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·
You felt better than you had in months, no, years. 
You had your brothers back and for the first time in years. The three of you were getting along and you knew you would finally be safe.
You also knew it was because of Lily as well. 
She was the fire in your darkness, she gave you light, warmth and she felt so happy and safe.
Everything felt good for once. But if you knew anything, you knew that wasn't going to last.
“You don't actually think she loves you do you?”
You turn to see none other than Severus Snape leaning by the entrance to the dungeons. You raise your eyebrow at him questioningly. 
You don't really talk to Snape unless it was necessary you never really liked him or the company he kept in recent years. So for him to start any conversion with you was rare.
“What are you on about Snape?”
“Lily.”
He states as if it's obvious.
“What about Lily?”
Your interest obviously peaked at hearing the name of your favorite Gryffindor.
“She'll never love you. She loves Potter.”
He says in a monotone voice. You scoff rolling your eyes. 
“I don't know why I'm bothering with this nonsense.”
You turn to walk away muttering to yourself. 
“She and Potter kissed, you know. The other week, at a Hufflepuff party. I saw them. Potter has been pining for Lily since our first year. It seems he finally got what he was after.”
You stood there shocked, confused, frozen with your jaw now clenched. 
That couldn't be true. Lily wouldn't do that and if she did she'd tell you right? I mean you were… whatever you are, right?
And James wouldn't do that. He had all but flat out asked you to be his sister.
Snape was lying, he had to be. He was spreading lies about Lily. He just had to be. You wouldn't stand for that. You felt ‘The Madness’ creep in once again.
In one swift motion you had Snape pinned against the wall with your wand pointed at his neck. 
“You will not speak of Lily again. You will not look at her, speak to her. You will not breathe the same air as her and if you do. I will kill you. Do I make myself clear?”
You say with murderous eyes. 
Snape would never admit it but he was scared. He's only ever seen you as cold, emotionless. This was far from emotionless. 
“Crystal.”
Snape said, trying to hide his emotions as best as he could. 
You walk away without another glance stuck in your head. 
He had to be lying right? But why would he lie? Nothing made sense. Maybe he wasn't lying.
Stupid. You were so fucking stupid.
How could you think someone like Lily Evans would like someone like you. 
Lily brings life to everything she touches, she was sweet, caring, kind she was fucking perfect.
You were a Black, enough said.
You were angry, mean, rude, it was in your blood to ruin everything you touch. 
It wasn't her fault that you thought you might actually have a chance, that you developed a stupid crush, it was your fault for being stupid enough to think that it was ever a possibility.
I mean maybe you and Lily were just friends. Maybe you misunderstood?
You couldn't blame her but that didn't mean it hurt less. 
The first person you started putting your walls down for the first time in years obviously didn't care about you the way you cared for her. 
So you did what you did best when people would hurt you.
You avoided and ignored her. You managed to avoid Lily for a few days skipping potions class, leaving the library when you would see her walk in. 
Sirius was quickly getting irritated with your antics. He had been pestering you as to why you were avoiding Lily but you wouldn’t tell him or Regulus. 
If they knew she would find out.
So you just kept avoiding her and avoiding answering any questions your brothers would ask.
Eventually she found you and tried to talk to you which led to you ignoring her. It killed you to see the look on her face but it was necessary to protect yourself. You tried to convince yourself that it would be easier after a week. 
It wasn't.
For either of you apparently. 
Lily had managed to find you in the library while you were looking for a book to distract yourself with. You had put your guard down for a moment. You didn't even know she was there till she spoke.
“Y/N.”
She had said to gain your attention, when you realized there wasn't anywhere for you to go you decided to just get it over with to stop avoiding your problems for the first time in your life. 
You rolled your eyes and sighed looking at her for the first time in a week.
“What the hell do you want Evens? Shouldn't you be with your boyfriend, Potter?”
You say to Lily in a monotone voice looking her in the eyes.
“What are you talking about? I'm not dating James, I don't want him!”
You felt all the anger and insecurity start to cloud your brain. She was lying. How dare she lie to you. You were damned if you were made a fool once again. 
“You're such a liar Evans. Snape told me everything about how Potter has been pining for you for years! How he saw you two kiss at the Hufflepuff party! I can't believe I was stupid enough to believe you'd actually like me. I can't believe I was stupid enough to think Potter would actually look at me as a sister.”
You whisper yelled with your jaw clenched while the back of your eyes burned trying to hold back tears. 
“Me and James didn’t kiss I swear-”
You scoff, turning to walk away deciding you were done with this conversation, but Lily grabbed you by the arm, tapping you against the bookshelf.
“I didn't kiss James.He's a great friend but nothing more to me, and he does care for you, I know he does. But I don't want him, I want you. I've wanted you since the first time I laid eyes on you. I love everything about you. I love how loyal you are, how even if you didn’t talk to your brother you'd never let anyone speak ill of them. How despite being raised to hate someone like me you never held something as stupid as my blood statutes against me. I love how smart you are. How you cover your smile when you laugh. How your eyes light up when youre reading a book you enjoy. How when you get anxious you play with your ring. Everything. Can’t you see that?”
You searched her eyes trying to see if there was any lie, but all you saw was the truth. She meant every word and it scared you. 
Lily then cupped your cheek wiping away a tear you didn't know was there.
“Why would you want me? I'm cold, rude, cynical and angry all the time. I'm not a great person...”
Lily scoffs playfully while smiling.
“You're no angel but you’re my everything Y/N. To me you light up the room, you don't take shit from anyone, you stand up for what you believe and I hope you'll never change. You showed me that I'm enough. I'll never stop wanting you. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”
Lily whispers the last part brushing her nose against yours.
“What if I hurt you?”
You whisper your voice breaking a little.
“You'll probably hurt me a few times and I'll probably hurt you a few times but that's okay as long as we work it out together, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
The anger and insecurity finally unclouding your brain letting you take in how close you two are. 
Lily's hand is still cupping your cheek while her other hand is on your hip pressing you slightly in the bookshelf while she's pressed against you.
Lily's eyes flicker down to your lips and you nod softly letting her know it was okay. 
You both lean in, your lips touching for the first time.
You felt warmth go through your whole body. It was beyond a spark or fireworks. It felt as if a bomb had been dropped on you. 
That kiss broke something in you. 
But it wasn't bad. 
It had broken down every wall that you spent years building up brick by brick. 
In just a moment Lily Evans had managed to do something to you, that you and so many other people thought impossible. 
She healed a part of you. 
Her lips were so soft they felt like silk against yours. 
It felt like she was made to be with you.
It's soft and sweet, at first. Then it felt consuming. She was all around you and you didn't want it to be any other way. 
You could only feel her, her hand squeezing your hip as your hand was on the back of her head pulling her closer. 
You could only smell her cherry and vanilla perfume. It made you dizzy with how intoxicating it was.
You had forgotten that you were in public for a moment that was until you heard a throat clear. 
Both of you pulling away with hot faces you look to see a very amused and smirking Remus Lupin. 
“Finally. I was afraid neither of you would ever actually make a move. Just wait till Sirius hears about this.”
You groan, throwing your head back against the bookcase while Remus and Lily laugh at your expense. 
You never expected for anyone to be able to break down your walls, to fall for someone. 
Especially not someone like Lily. 
But fuck were you happy that she did.
⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳
91 notes · View notes
Note
Can you do a Remus Lupin and Reader where she gets hurt during quidditch and he helps her around the castle? Thank you so much and I love your writing
A/n: Thank you so much for the request!! I literally dropped everything to do this, oml. I will always priorities Reqs but this was so cute!!
Also, just realized requests weren't set to allow annon automatically?? That has been fixed on my end
Break a Leg Not My Heart
Can't Help Falling in Love Elvis Presley
Remus Lupin x Reader
Wc- 4960
Cw; Use of Y/N, Cussing, negative thoughts, reader is unhinged, reader is unsirius, (Tell me if i missed anything!)
taglist- @otterlockholmes
Everyone knew Remus Lupin could be a bit of a push over. 
Now, that's not to say he wasn't stern and serious when he needed to be, when he knew what was best, or just when Sirius said much of anything that started with ‘Hear me out.’
He was a Prefect, he was known for being a certain quality of student. Studious, always in the library studying with Lily Evans and {Y/N} {L/N}. Wise beyond his years, helping anyone who needed it. He volunteered to help tutor some of the first years with {Y/N} most Sunday evenings. Punctural, made a point to be on time to everything. Well, if he could help it, you did like to sleep in.
Not many people noticed the common theme in his actions. The traits that made up the Lycan were so tightly woven into his friendships, well, more particularly his friendship with you. He never gave up who he was, he never went that far, but it was clear that in the forethought of his, you were in every equation. Sirius certainly noticed.
Sirius would bemoan about it all the time, how you both insisted you were friends, absolutely clueless. He stood by it, however, friends don't look at eachother like you do. Remus insisted you were friends. Best friends.
The feeling was mutual, of course it was. Who doesn't want to spend every second of the day with their platonic soulmate? You would make a point to drag him around with you everywhere you went. You were never shy about it, your words slowly going from questioning to affirmatives. 
“Remus, I am heading to lunch now, come with me?”
“Remus, we are going to the Black Lake, it's hot.”
“Remus, I have Quidditch practice.”
That was another trait of Remus Lupin. He could care less about Quidditch, but not much less. He would complain about going, as he followed you upstairs to your dorm to help bring your gear down. Would try to decipher the ridiculous rules while finding a seat in the stands with Lily and Mary, both coming to support their respective partners.
That's how you got here now, same routine. You were floating above the stands, even as a backup beater you still had to attend every practice. You would complain to James about it, seeing as you only agreed to it as a favor, but he would tease you about it every time. He was lucky some stuff he said was funny. He so rarely was.
You watched Sirius, who was currently the one you were assigned to tag out. It was a lot of time wasted, just floating near your friends and talking when you were sure James didn't notice. Eventually, you turned to Remus in the stands and smiled to see him furrowing his brow at the strange reps James was making the two beaters do. 
“Rem!” You called over to him and lowered down to his eye level, still a good few yards away from them. He looked up at you and lifted an eyebrow. 
“Yeah?”
“Knock knock!”
He looked at you confused before Lily nudged him. “The muggle joke?”
He furrowed his eyebrows at her next before they shot up in realization. “Ah! Who's knocking?” He called over and you threw your head back in a laugh as Lily covered her mouth with a snicker. Mary holding Lily's shoulder as Remus looked at you three incredulously. 
“That's the bloody line, right?”
“Who's there?” Lily laughed out, and you began to dry your tears.
“Tank!”
“Tank who?”
“You're welc-” Before you could even finish the line there was a loud thud and your head jerked forward. You were confused for a moment, smile slowly falling as you looked at the three.
Everything was slowing down, and no matter how hard you squinted, your vision continued to blur. Suddenly, and gradually, hot burning pain rushed threw the back of your head. It was so jarring you teared up, and you could faintly hear a bunch of voices, but you couldn't make out what they said. Slowly, your grip on your broom lessened. 
Warm drops of what you could only assume was your own ichor dropped down your face. Then, your vision started to flash. You were far too loopy to panic, images of you on your broom slipped into a slideshow of you falling, that ended right before you hit the ground.
~~~
“She'll need to rest for the next two days for it to heal, her head is fine but her leg will need some getting used to. Two days in a cast should do her fine.”
Madam Pomfrey’s voice filled the room and you stirred with a whine. Eyes fluttering open and blinded by the lights above. 
“Ugh.. my head…” You groaned, bringing your wrist to your throbbing temple. You fluttered open your eyes and looked around you, seeing James pacing the room and Sirius in front him, while Remus seemed to be shouting at him. Your ears began to ring as your blood rushed, so you couldn't hear him, but you could see the vain in his neck bulging out at his irritation. His tanned face a deep red, and Sirius looked apologetic, just taking the verbal battering.
There was a hand on your shoulder and you turned to see Lily and Mary sitting on the chairs beside you, Peter was behind them smiling softly. “Hey,” You couldn't hear him, but you could see his lips moving. You frowned as the words became more elaborate so you couldn't quite track them.
You looked around at your friends' concerned faces. Lily looked past you and you turned, seeing Remus was kneeling by your bed and saying something you couldn't hear. You huffed and rubbed your temple, closing your eyes. The ringing slowly stopped, but the sounds of the room never returned. You opened your eyes and Remus was looking at you, filled with concern. “Starlight?”
That was a mouth shape you recognized. You reached out to touch his hand and squeeze it, blinking a bit before you spoke. “I can't hear a damned thing. But did you get my joke?” 
You watched as Remus seemed to go through the five stages of grief, before he settled on giving you the most unamused, annoyed, dead inside look you had ever witnessed. That made you smile. Well, smirk, mischievously. “That joke is literal gold, you just don't know talent.”
This time, Remus stood up and walked over to madam Pomfrey and after a small exchange she walked off. You looked around the room idly, trying to pretend you weren't anxious, patting your palms against your blanket covered legs. You could see your friends talking, but you couldn't hear a thing. Your nerves were on end. They looked worried, but you tried your best to keep calm and collected. You knew that if you began to worry, show even a bit of panic or upset, everyone else would too. What was the point anyway? Panicking wouldn't fix your hearing.
At least you don't think so-
Eventually, a hand rested on your shoulder. It was comforting and large, your right hand instinctively crossed your body to rest on it. You turned and smiled up at Remus. He held out a parchment to you and it had large chicken scratch on it. You always found how messy his handwriting was hilarious. He thinks faster than he writes.
‘You broke your leg. Pomfrey says it has to stay in a cast for a day or two, as for your hearing, she says it's a trauma response. Your body will return it when it's ready.’
You scoffed and looked at your hands with an offended bravado. “Who says they get to pick when my hearing goes? No appreciation! I keep you alive, you dumb thing!”
You didn't notice how Remus laughed at how ridiculous you were being. He always admired how easily you could brush stuff so big off. Like when you found out about his condition.
“Oh damn. That's.. so not the bee’s knees.’
Not the bee's knees. He had to have Lily explain that to him. Who in their right mind says that? To their friend in the hospital wing after confessing one of his most hated parts of himself?
He didn't know if he hated or loved you in that moment.
It grew on him, even if he denied it. You were just so damn strange.
“Darn, I guess no classes, hm?” You gave a faux sigh of disappointment. You turned to see Remus say something to Madam before turning back to you, smiling and waving his hand the quill began to write.
‘She says I can monitor you for classes, you should be fine.’
You gave him the dirtiest look you could muster.
“Hey, Rem, so you actually suck a lot.”
~~~
Remus had insisted on walking you back to the Gryffindor commons, carrying your equipment the whole way. You had to use a cane for the time being, so the second you tried to pick up the heavy bag you about gave Remus a heart attack.
Sirius, still pouting even after you accepted his millionth apology, coasted behind you both. You really wish you knew what Remus had said to him. 
When you got to your dorm Remus set your things down and set your bed up with a prop for your leg. You continued to complain about the special treatment as he nagged you for your messy side of the dorm while he was at it. You had to admit, Remus was incredibly sweet. It made your heart clench a bit at how much he seemed to care about your current state. 
You sat on your bed, taking off your robe and letting it fall behind you. Watching Remus rant on, for once, a little sad you couldn't hear his lecture. He seemed so determined to make sure you were comfortable.
Little did you know, to Remus, this was the perfect opportunity to return your kindness. To repay you for all the nights you spent with him in the infirmary, the forgiveness and patience you extended to him during the days up to the full moon, and the doting you gave him after. Not to mention, it felt a bit domestic. He would process his guilt over it later, indulging up such a thought with you unaware. 
Eventually, your roommates got annoyed with his rambling. Marlene threw a pillow at him and she grabbed you from behind making you almost scream in surprise. 
She said something to Remus that made him look away bashfully, and he looked at you, mouthing a goodnight that you returned.
~~~
Remus was at your door early in the morning, which gave you a right scare. He offered you his hand and you looked at it before tilting your head at him curiously he mouthed something and you'd don't quite understand, slowly setting your hand in his extended one.
He gave several different expressions in the matter of a second, before he threw his head back in a laugh. Usually, you'd be embarrassed, but you ended up laughing along with him. He looked happy and you knew Remus would never make fun of you out of malice.
He calmed his breathing and lowered your hand back to your cane, before reaching over this time to take your books and make, your mouth opening and a low, “Ooooohhh,” left you. He laughed at that too.
When you made it to breakfast you were talking animatedly and Remus was listening thoughtfully. He would occasionally make a nod or shake his head at some things you said, not able to face you with how your gaze was locked on him to gather all his micro expressions. He had set himself up for disaster.
Once you sat at the table and greeted everyone, you hardly paid attention to Remus. You focused mostly on your food. 
You loved being around your friends, you did, but not being able to hear them was so isolating. You could see Remus talking to James, and by the look on his face, it was likely about something they had done they most certainly shouldn't have. You could see Lily, also giving James the most incredulous look ever. 
Mary and Marlene were talking and glancing at the Hufflepuff table, but you couldn't gather a thing otherwise. Sirius was debating something with Peter who you could only describe as distressed. Some interesting hand movements later and a slap from Marlene, you could assume it was something vile. Soon, you gave in and just soaked up their presence. You didn't need to hear them to be a part of the group, just.. the conversation. 
Suddenly, you gave a small yelp as your leg was lifted. Remus, without stoping his verbal battle with James, lifted your ankle and rested your hurt foot on his lap. You melted a bit, it was always the smaller things he did that let you know you had a best friend in him. 
Just a best friend.
Even as his thumb trailed circles on your exposed knee, his forefingers resting on your inner thigh. Yup. Totally best friends.
~~~
Your leg ended up falling asleep like that. You playfully reprimanded him and he just gave you a laugh that you couldn't hear but your mind filled in the blanks. You noticed how proud and confident he seemed to be, taking care of you. It was sweet.
As you walked from class to class he carried your things and was there at your desk the second the bell rang. Then there were potions.
You shared potions with all of the boys and Lily, so you usually sat with Peter so Sirius could bum off of Remus’s hard work, leaving James to swoon while his girlfriend did all the work. You looked to the board and grimaced, wiggenweld. You knew it was a practice instead of theory day, but you were hoping for an easier potion.
To your surprise, Peter was sitting with a pouting Sirius, your usual spot cleared up. Before you could make a remark Remus put his things down and sat where Peter usually did. You found yourself smiling bright. “What the heck Remus?” You teased and sat down, once again, he lifted your leg onto his lap to keep it elevated.
Like a best friend would do.
“Can't leave me be for a half hour, Remmy?” You teased him as he took out his parchment and began to pull aside ingredients you couldn't reach with your stationary leg.
You were distracted storing out the ingredients by order and scribbling down notes on the more vague steps. You didn't get a chance to notice Remus smiling at you, his eyes sparking with new found fondness. “No I can not.” He muttered to no one in particular.
Not noticing himself as Sirius gestured aggressively to you two in aspiration. Lily laughed at his display and James covered his mouth to hide his smile. Seems Remus was finally clued in.
You began to work on the potion as Slughorn dismissed the class to their assignments. You prepped the ingredients and fell into an easy and fluid motion with Remus. You didn't have a clue why you hadn't worked together before, you did everything together anyway, and Sirius could suck it.
Your friends watched as you smiled down at the horklump, rubbing a spoon over it threw a strainer, giving a laugh as it splattered on your face. Remus watched you, smiling softly. He seemed distracted the whole practical exam, but there wasn't a moment he wasn't listening to you. 
Your test ended with a passing grade, that's all you really needed. Still, Remus apologized for being distracted. 
Remus Lupin was a perfectionist in everything he did. He felt that even in his best moments he was seconds away from failing. He improved himself until there was nothing to improve upon. He aced assignments, mentored underclassmen, pulled off some of the most outrageous pranks in Hogwarts history, he even turned down the head boy position for James, everything he had done in the last seven years felt unsatisfactory. Apathy wasn't a foreign concept to him.
Neither was pity. Those two things were handed out to him in the eyes of everyone he'd ever met. No matter how far Remus came, disappointment was still holding him by his in a silent reminder that nothing would outshine the worst of him. It swallowed him whole most days, his self doubt. So he stayed distracted, chasing the high of praise and approval. 
He was much like Sirius in that regard, but Sirius acted out and Remus did his best to go unnoticed by anyone other than the people closest to him. Unless it was about his achievements.
He wanted to be remarkable and unnoticed, it was the contradiction that was Remus Lupin.
You made him feel those two things, like he was the most important thing in the world, like you couldn't do anything without him. Then, you made him feel like a normal student. Like he was just someone in the herd. He liked that about you.
But having you depend on him, just today, there was something new brimming in his chest. He grappled with the realization that you being dependent on him for a change was more fulfilling than his collective five years of overshadowed achievements.
You seemed him out; when you found him you needed him. Not that it couldn't be anyone else, you chose him. Well, he volunteered, but when you looked up at him with those eyes of yours he knew you had no qualms with it. He felt strong, he felt needed, and he felt like he wasn't the one hurting. 
{Y/N} {L/N} never needed anyone. You made that clear since first year, you were remarkably strange and friendly, you never filtered yourself out for anyone. You were you, that's all you needed to be. You didn't need to be witnessed to live.
But you wanted Remus to witness you.
He was learning that he loved to. To witness you. 
Yet here you were, none the wiser, while Remus realized how far he had fallen for his best friend. And in all honesty;
He wasn't scared.
~~~
Once dinner came around you were reminded just how out of the loop you were without your hearing. You were poking at your meal with your head down, pushing around a bit of your uneaten food. Today had been long, and every break mostly consisted of you trailing after your group and watching them laugh and indulge in each other's presence. 
You knew it wasn't the end of the world, tomorrow morning you would be cut free of your cast and eventually your hearing would come back.
It drove you mad not knowing when though. You knew it wouldn't stay forever, you were self assured in that fact, but knowing the possibility of it being weeks, months, Merlin, even a year? An entire year of not hearing your friends' voices. Dragging Remus down with you.
You didn't notice your friend's concerned look. Eventually, as you stared down at the fork in your hand, a note slid into your peripheral, it was Lily's handwriting, the only person you know to be able to flow her letters so perfectly.
‘Ready?’
You looked up to see people had started packing up. You nodded and began to stand, Remus slipping his hand behind your lower back making you jolt a bit. He flinched away and you immediately cursed, ‘come baaaccck.’
~~~~
Your thoughts followed you to the common room. Before you could escape your friends, go allow yourself to mope, everyone insisted on drinking and talking. 
You didn't want to. You really didn't. Remus was staying behind, however, and you know how much he hated when you'd leave him to be the only responsible drinker. Not that he had to worry too much, Mary always stayed sober to reel in Marlene.
You let yourself believe he just wanted to spend time with you. 
So here you were, sitting on the couch, leaning you back against the arm rest and staring at the group as they talked. Your legs were resting over Remus’s, his lithe fingers rubbing up and down your exposed knee to the bottom of your skirt. Now, this was something Remus would never do, but you didn't even have time to enjoy the satisfying moment of slight intimacy, still too in the dumps.
Your frown deepened as you watched people get up to dance around you. Lily had put a song on the record, you only knew it to be ‘Love Grow(where my Rosemary goes)’ by Edison Lighthouse, because of the album cover she brandished to James with a little wiggle of her eyebrows. One of your favorites. 
At this point, your arms were crossed in a pout as you watched everyone dance but you and Remus. You blinked away those thoughts and turned to Remus. 
“You can go dance, I won't be offended.” You muttered out with a pout. He turned to look at you from the dancing figures. He seemed to come to some conclusion, and tapped your calf. You moved your legs and went back to watching the group before his hand was in your face. You looked up at him confused to see him offering it to you. You carefully took his hand and he lifted you up, leading you on the dance floor. You were wobbly, but he nudged your hurt foot until you arched it up, he took on most of your weight and you leaned into his chest to balance.
He began to sway, you laughed, and he beamed at how happy you seemed. It was ridiculous, you both looked ridiculous, Sirius gave a wolf whistle you couldn't hear and he couldn't give less of a fuck. 
As you got more comfortable he pulled back and began to spin and slide with you. You were a giggling mess and he wrapped his arms around your waist and faced you away from him, making you tilt your head all the way back to see him. He could have died right there. 
As the song faded out, you guys stopped your completely tone deaf moves, and he looked back with a dazzling smile at Lily who put on another song. He was panting, he could see all his friends watching with what seemed to be far too interested looks.
When his eyes went back to you, you were still staring up at him with a bright rush of affection. Somehow, always, Remus knew just what to do. Just what to say. 
The song kicked up and Remus thinned his lips a bit.
‘Can’t Help Falling in Love’ by Elvis Presley. 
He knew he shouldn't. He should fool himself with something so intimate. But you were looking back at him with so much excitement, so much love, who the hell was he to say no?
… Wise men say
Only fools rush in
He nodded to you and you spun to face him again, leg swaying a bit from where you kept it up. You moved to put some space between you, but instead, he wrapped one hand around your lower back and took your other hand. His movements were identical to Marlene with Mary and James with Lily, Sirius even managed to get a girl from one of the many onlookers to dance with him. His being much more professional.
But I can't help falling in love with you
You were confused at first, but you wouldn't say you hated it. It was intimate, as he pulled your chest to his and gave you his smile now. You pressed your tongue to your cheek and smirked at him. He gave you a playful wink as you rolled your eyes.
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin
If I can't help falling in love with you?
He gave you a slow and careful swirl, and when you returned to him, he pulled your head to his chest and rested his chin to your head.
… Like a river flows
Surely to the sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things are meant to be
He gave you a playful dip and you finally laughed, relaxing fully into the oddly familiar feeling. He's held you before, but never so carefully. Like he could loser you at any point if one thumb was misplaced. 
… Take my hand
Take my whole life, too
He suddenly flattened out his hand against yours. You turned to look from where your face was peacefully nuzzled into his chest. You watched as he spread his fingers, and in turn, yours. Before he interlocked them. You bit your bottom lip and looked up at him. He was mouthing some of the lyrics, and you just managed to watch the last verse.
“For I can't help falling in love with you.”
Your eyes widened. Was he.. was he serious? His eyes were staring into yours like he was putting himself on the line with those words. You took a deep breath and held it, as he leaned down towards you as you both slowed to a stop. You stared at his lips, waiting so patiently for his next words.
“I love you, {Y/N}.” 
The words looked so natural on his lips. You didn't know what to say. You knew what he said. You didn't have a doubt in your mind about it. You suddenly moved in and kissed him, eyes closed before you pulled away. It was quick, it was a bit hard. His lips were chapped and his eyes were still on yours when you opened them. 
He looked stunned, and you couldn't hear the loud, “Finally!” From Sirius.
Nor could you hear Lily’s delighted gasp when he moved in and kissed you again. His hands left your side and hand, grabbing your cheeks. His fingers loosen when you meet him halfway, moving down to your neck and resting his thumbs on your cheeks.
You broke the kiss again, forgetting how to breathe. His lips followed yours before his eyes fluttered but stayed closed. You looked at him in pure shock. What do you do now? What do you say? Did it matter?
Suddenly his face scrunched up and you narrowed your eyes a bit.
“Ow ow ow ow..” Remus muttered and you flinched back when you read his lips. You had rested your casted foot against his toes. Wincing and apologizing like crazy, you moved too quickly and the weight shift caused you to fall back. He quickly caught you in a very deep dip. One hand around your neck and the other around your lower back. Your arms wrapped around his neck and everything was slow.
What a lovely cliche. 
It got even better, as he lifted you closer and kissed you again. His hand from your neck sliding down to help keep your casted leg bent to his hip. 
It was perfect.
~~~ Bonus Scene ~~~
You woke up to the sound of Marlene and Lily talking idly in your dorm room. A few days after the dancing and you and Remus had slipped from friends to more in such a simple and seamless mesh. 
A mesh of messy kisses and rushed ‘I love you’s in the hall. Late night rendezvous in the common room grossing out your friends with all the stolen kisses and messy cuddles where limbs weren't easily identifiable in the dark.
You smiled softly, unable to tame how your heart clenched and a goofy smile took your lips. Then it hit you. You could hear.
You shot your head up and began tos scramble for Remus’s jumper he left over last night. Marlene and Lily snapping over to look at you but not getting a word in before you were dashing out of the room in just your pajama pants and his sweater. 
You don't know how quickly you were running until you made it to his dorm. Your healed leg throbbing from lack of use but you couldn't care less. You slammed your way into the prefect dorms, Remus long since given you the password.
You ignored fussy prefects and walked right up to Remus’s dorm. You knocked in a rush, and the door opened to show James. You'd didn't even care to ask him why he wasn't in the Head Boy dorms, just shoving past him to hurry into the room. 
Sirius looked up from a lounge chair in the corner and smirked when he saw you, opening his mouth to make a smart remark before you interrupted him. 
“Remus?”
“Starlight?” Remus called out from the closet, stepping out in pajama pants as well, no short, and a towel in his messy hair. He couldn't help but smile at your rosey cheeked winded gasps, despite his confusion. “What are you-”
“Say it.” You demanded quickly and closed the gap between them. He looked at you confused before it suddenly hit him that you had responded and reacted to his words. You could hear him.
He let the towel fall from his hair to his shoulders as he wrapped his arms around your waist and brought you close. “Say what?”
“You love me.” You commanded with puffy flustered cheeks. Suddenly so much less confident now that you faced him. He laughed and moved his hands to your cheeks.
“You came running all the way here for that?”
“Remus, I've been waiting years.”
“I love you, {Y/N}.” He whispered and pulled you into a kiss. You smiled and gave a sigh of bliss into it. This time, you were able to hear Sirius wolf whistle behind you.
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theprenderelliepalace · 3 months
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A Simple Christmas
°•°*°•°
James Potter x Reader
Tags: Enemies to lovers, friends to lovers, slow burn, Christmas fluff, unrequited love, angst/fluff, GRYFFINDOOR QUIDITCH Y'ALL
Summary: You and James Potter have been rivals since first year, but a Quidditch incident in your fourth year brings you closer. Spending Christmas at the Potter's, you realize your feelings for James might be more than just rivalry. With a little holiday magic, you discover that sometimes love is hidden in the most unexpected places
Warnings: Minor injury, mild language, slight angst (concerned reader), tensions...
Words: 2.7k
°•°*°•°
You started the tradition of Christams at the Potter's in fourth year.
It was an unlikely thing for you to agree to, seeing as you hated James Potter's guts from the moment you bumped into him on the Express in first year.
He was rude, loud, arrogant and the most devious 11 year-old you'd ever had the displeasure of meeting.
And then he grew up...
He and his gang of Mauraders were always the talk of the school, "Potter this- Potter that." "Oh,did you hear about Potter's latest prank? It was brilliant!" You began to detest him with even greater passion. It certainly didn't help, in third year when you both tried out for the Gryffindoor Quiditch team. He was a great Seeker- you'd give him that- yet, every time you won a match, you couldn't help the strange sensation of emotions that would fill your chest and cloud your eyes.
He was so, easy, everything was easy for James Potter. Talking, smiling, laughing. You started to notice everything about him and suddenly that became easy too. He would do something funny and outrageous and you'd catch yourself staring. He'd make a quip at you, you'd fire back and you'd find yourself laughing. Smiling even!
Then every day, you'd tell yourself, 'this has to stop.' Or, 'pull yourself together, Y/n! We hate him! He's a foul example of Gryffindoor overconfidence, he's a lousy classmate. He couldn't spell the word reliable with the help of the Imperious Curse!' And then you'd stop short and sigh, and watch the way he talked to her.
Lily Evans was beautiful, she was the "most talented witch of her age," Professor Dippet would praise after every assignment. She was smart, she was vibrant. Everything James Potter could want. In fact he did, he'd wanted her from the very moment he'd seen her on that train. He'd bumped into you to get to her.
Was that why you hated him? Because he'd chosen her over you? You shook your head at the thought. No. Of course not, you'd both made your beds with those very first insults on that train. That's how it was and how it would always be.
Until it wasn't...
°•°*°•°
It was the first match of the term in your fourth year. Tensions were high. Slytherin vs. Gryffindoor. Everyone was on edge to get one over on the other house. You had to admit, you were feeling strung pretty high to win this particular game. And it was not happening.
You groaned from your broom as you listened to Sirius Black narrate yet another goal for Slytherin over the loud speaker with slew of curses flying off as rapidly as he could come up with them. You caught a brief glance of the new Transfigurations teacher, Professor McGonagall, snatch the microphone from him and tell him off with such sterness, you could understand why the infamous trouble causer was cowering in the stands.
You stole yourself from the scene and focused on the task at hand. A fellow Gryffindoor Chaser was flying for you, fast, you steadied yourself on your broom and prepared to take the Quaffle. You snatched it at lightning speed, taking off to the other end of the pitch, the Slytherin Chasers caught in your dust. You scored. "10 points to Gryffindoor!" Black shouted.
Good, you were tied now. You spun around, you jumped as something hurtled past you and downwards to the field. You heard the roars of the crowd before you could make out what it was. "Potter's got the snitch!" Sirius bellowed. The Gryffindoors were chanting Potter's name before you could even steady your broom. You were smiling at him.
He was holding the snitch in his hand, waving it around in triumph. "Way to go Potter!" You called down to him. He looked up at you, grinning at you lopsidedly.
"That a compliment Y/l/n?" You shook your head at him playfully.
"Don't let it go to you'd head!" His grin widened.
"Not like that would-" You couldn't hear the rest of his sentence before you looked around to find a Slytherin Beater 30 feat away, her bat raised over her shoulder and the bludger she'd hit, flying straight at you. All you could comprehend was the searing pain in your head as it made impact. You slid off your broom ... it was all so hazy... someone caught you... someone was saying your name... and then came the darkness.
°•°*°•°
You woke up with a searing headache and foggy vision. -"concussion Mr Potter. You must leave my patient to recover."
"But it's been days Madame Pomfrey. Shouldn't she be awake?" You couldn't quite make out the owner of the voice, your ears were buzzing like a colony of pixies were fluttering around in there. You made a guess though and when you gingerly opened an eye, the first thing you saw was his shaggy mop of black hair cascading over his worried face.
Worried? Why should he be worried about you? He hated you, right. Right? Then you listened to his voice, the pleading tone and lilt of angst. It was so unlike the boy you'd spent four years getting to know that you were taken aback. You felt the urge to make fun of him by saying something clever, instead you just groaned and your smirk turned into a grimace. "Y/n!"
He was by your side in a flash, or perhaps you'd just blinked really slowly. While Madame Pomfrey fussed over you, you listened to him talk. -" and then, that skeevy brat, she had the gall to pretend to be sorry when the ref told her off. Of course, the Captain was furious and he spent an hour and a half trying to disqualify them from the whole season. It's a pity we've got a Slytherin flying coach this year, else he totally wouldn't have allowed them to play after you'd got hurt." James shook his head like the very notion disgusted him. "But, I think their Beater, Doldra Macconal, she'll find herself a nice little surprise tomorrow morning." He smiled devilishly. Perhaps it was the ointment that Madame Pomfrey had put over your bruises that turned your face bright red but suddenly you felt very hot.
Madame Pomfrey bustled away to fetch a clean cloth and this gave you time to think. "Wait, who caught me after I fell? I would've had a few more broken bones than this if I just fell off my broom." It was the first time you'd actually spoken, your voice sounded foreign in your throat and you jumped slightly. James looked at you sympathetically for a moment before your question sunk in. You watched him curiously as his cheeks pinkened and a bashful look fluttered over his face.
"Well, you just fell, like, clean off your broom. And- and I was right there, so..." He seemed much to embarrassed to continue. So you finished for him. He nodded sheepishly. You smiled at him, even though it hurt and asked, "What'dya mean Macconnel will find a surprise tomorrow morning?" You glared at him more sternly, "James, what did you do?" He gafawed at you.
"I think that's the first time you've called me by my name." You looked surprised at him, even he seemed surprised. Then you both burst into laughter.
You chatted for what seemed like hours after that, going back and forth between the match and the gossip around Hogwarts while you'd been out. But after a painstakingly short 20 minutes, Madame Pomfrey shooed James out of the hospital wing. He glanced back at you with a sad smile. You tried to smile back, it didn't go very well, but he got the message.
When you got out of the hospital that seemed to be it. You, James Potter and his Marauding gang became inseparable after that. It was like all you needed to do was talk to him and suddenly you were head over heels- no! No way!
°•°*°•°
The train was bustling with students all heading home for the holidays. You stood on the platform, proudly suiting your 6th year status and watching the first years fondly as they lept onto the train. "Watcha thinking 'bout Y/n/n?" You smiled at James as he came to stand beside you. He heaved his luggage in front of him with a disgruntled huff.
"Hmm, just when we started being friends. Hey, what did you actually do to Macconnel after she bludgered me? I never actually asked." James laughed his hearty laugh that you'd come to love. You shook your head, stop it, you scolded yourself.
"Oh Goddric,it was so great. But id forgotten 'bout it. We gave her a right scare." He smiled fondly at the memory.
"It's creepy that you think about it with that kind of smile on your face." You stepped onto the train, dragging your trunk after you.
"Oi! What's that? What's wrong with my face?" He followed after you.
"I think she means you look right ugly Prongsy." Came Sirius's lilting voice from a nearby cabin. You laughed as you shoved past him, the two of you exchanging mischievous glances.
"Listen to Pads, James. He has a point." You stuck your tongue out at him, deciding to drop the Macconnel story. He glowered back at you. He heaved his trunk onto the top shelf, turning to you and so naturally lifting yours up, taking it from your hands. Your stomach did summersaults as your fingers brushed. Sirius chuckled. You spun on him and did a wild shushing motion with your full upper body. This only made him fully laugh.
James turned. "Eh, what's funny now?" Sirius held his hands up in mock surrender at your furious glare.
"Nothing, nothing mate. Swear it." He slumped down onto the seat closest to the window, leaving just enough room for you and James to sit achingly close together on the opposite bench. You felt like hexing him, but you supposed James would notice and ask what all the fuss was about. He wasn't that dense.
You elected to change the subject. "Moony not coming this year?" James and Sirius sighed in unison.
"Nope. Burried his nose so deep in the library's books I'm worried he'll turn into one before we get back after the holidays." Sirius answered. You scoffed.
"Oh please, he's so prepared for our N.E.W.T.S next year, even McGonagall is telling him to give it a rest."
"I know!" Both the boys exclaimed in unison. "Where's Wormtail though?" James asked the reclining nuisance of a wizard taking up half the cabin. Sirius shrugged.
"Dunno. Says your mummy scares him. Decided to stay and 'keep Remus alive.' Whatever that means."
The train ride back to the Potter's was usually your favorite part of the holiday, but so close to Prongs, you might as well have burst into flames where you sat. "You okay, Y/n/n?" Your very oblivious crush asked.
"Yeah." You cleared your throat. "Yep, just fine Prongs." You squeaked. Black sniggered. You threw your shoe at him.
"Hey!"
°•°*°•°
It was an hour to midnight, an hour 'til Christmas and you were wandering the Potter house in the dead of night. The absence of sleep very obvious. You sighed as you found yourself, yet again, in the living room. You plodded over to the fireplace, where the dying embers crackled soothingly. You sank down with a thud and a heavy sigh, curling your blanket around you.
A dawning realization had struck you about 3 hours ago and it was churning your insides like sticky taffy, getting stuck in your every waking thought. You were in love with James Potter. This morning, mind you, you'd mearly thought you'd liked him and then he smiled at you- really smiled- and you knew.
And it was the most impossible thought you'd ever had. He loved someone else, someone much better than you. He maybe didn't deserve her, but he certainly had more of a shot with her than you did with him. He was your best friend! Loving him was like loving your pet Grindylow until it bites your hand off. You didn't want your friendship to be at stake, it was the last thing you wanted to think about, but here you were; thinking about it.
"Y/n?" Came his groggy voice from the stairs landing.
"Yeah Jamie?" Whoops, that just slipped out. Obviously he didn't notice because he came and sat beside you. You watched him rub the sleep from his eyes and yawn. He put his hands out in front of the fire and shuddered.
"It's bloody cold down here. Why're you still up?" You shrugged. Tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear. The firelight made his cheeks look redder than usual.
"Lots to think about. Why're you still up?" You mimicked. He glanced away.
"I've been thinking; there's this girl-"
"Yeah, yeah, Prongsy, Lily, the light of your life. Let's assume I've probably heard it before." You felt your heart tug painfully.
"When have you heard me talk about Evans like that?" He accused.
"Uhm, all these long, harrowing years that I've known you?" You shot back.
"Harrowing. Huh." He huffed. Looking affronted. You smiled at him softly. Bumping your shoulder against his.
"Sorry Jamie." It happened again, but you didn't really mind.
"See there you go again!" He shouted, standing up. You were following him before you knew it. Your blanket falling to the floor.
"Shh! Shh!" You pointed to the ceiling, warning him about waking his parents. He shook his head.
"You're bossing me around and it's driving me crazy!" He whisper-yelled. "You're- you're calling me these sweet little nicknames. You're brushing my hair out of my face, you're worried about me when I get hurt on the Pitch. And Merlin Y/n, the way you look at me..." He softened now, "The way you look at me just makes me..."
"Crazy?" You finished. Your heart was beating out of your chest. There was a glimmer of something there, but you couldn't let it be hope. He was looking at you dazedly through his square glasses, his hair ruffled and his lips softly parted. You could imagine the feel of them against yours.
He gulped. "Something like that." And then it clicked.
"In- in fourth year, when I'd just woken up in the hospital wing. I asked you, I asked you if you liked me or something, because you were acting so strangely... I just thought... but it was a joke!" You were whisper-yelling now. Frantic. "You replied and, and I didn't hear you... but you said that. You said-"
"Or something." You were both staring at each other. The tension so thick you couldn't cut it with a knife.
You shook your head. "You're in love with Evans!" He took a slow step towards you. "I'm not her, I could never be her. I wouldn't want to be."
"Good." He said as he reached you, he put a tender hand to your cheek. "Because I haven't thought about Lily Evans even half as much as I've ever thought about you. She couldn't hold a floating candle to you Y/n. Not in my head." The look in his eyes was so soft, so beseeching, that you just had to ask:
"Jamie, kiss me already?" And suddenly he was on you. His lips colliding with yours, melding into you. He felt so perfect, a piece of a puzzle snapping into place. He prodded your lips with his tongue, you eagerly obliged, your lips parting.
You both groaned into the kiss as he deepend it. You wrapped your arms around his neck, he leveraged your legs in his hands, guiding you to jump up and wrap your legs around his waist. You were just about to take his glasses off when-
"Bout bloody time. You know lovebirds, I couldn't stand one more bloody Christmas with you two pining after each other. I think Moony was going to implode if we had to see one more honey-eyed-"
"Sirius!" You both shouted. James let you out of his grasp, but he kept you firmly pinned to his chest.
"Sod off, you prat. We're busy." James growled.Padfoot waved an absent hand and turned to head back upstairs.
"Off I go. But Merry Christmas to the happy couple." He snickered. "Ooo, this is the best Christmas present ever! Those two back at Hogwarts are gonna be so mad!" He said with a singsong cheeriness that was much too righteous for 12 am. The clock struck midnight.
"Happy Christmas Y/n." James smiled at you warmly.
You kissed him again, running your hands through his tussled hair. "Merry Christmas Jamie." He picked you up again and you giggled at him. "You know what I want my Christmas present to be?"
"What, princess?" He asked with a lovesick smile.
"Be my boyfriend?" He beamed at you.
"Ask and you shall receive!" He threw you onto the couch, you shrieked and giggled as he followed suit. He shushed you, but it would be many hours before either of you were actually quiet.
°•°*°•°
A/n Yes! Okay, I know it's cannon divergent but I thought it was cute (and yes, probably getting hit square in the head with a bludger would blow your brain up, but I'm allowed some creative and magical liberties).
Requests/asks are open
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sweetiecutie · 2 years
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Pairing: Lily Evans x fem! Reader
Warnings: smut, fingering, infidelity (rip James lol)
A/n: the amount of Lily fics on this app is disastrously small, which is, I think, a crime against humankind. Also, it may look like Lils is mean here but it’s not what I intended, I promise😥
- Shhh, darling, gotta be quiet f’me, okay? Don’t want others to hear what a naughty little girl you are, do we? - Lily tutted, a charming smile curling her lush lips as she fucked her fingers in and out of your sopping pussy ferociously, making your eyes roll and toes curl in tingling pleasure.
You nodded your head weakly, pressing a hand to your mouth, trying so so hard to suppress all the little sounds trying to break past your lips - an impossible task considering the way Lily pinned your with her chubby fingered you so viciously. Wet slippery sounds filled the crammy space of the girls’ dormitories, making you blush even deeper; Lily’s free hand came up to fondle your bare breasts, playing with supple flesh and twisting your nipples almost painfully, bringing you closer to your orgasm.
Your eyes fixated on Lily’s full breasts peeking so teasingly out of the low-cut of her black t-shirt, jiggling so prettily with the way her arm moved rapidly while fucking your greedy pussy. You recognized the familiar tingle settling in a pit of your belly, stomach tensing in sweet anticipation of nearing orgasm.
- Lily, ‘m gonna cum, - you barely whined, head spinning from heat and overwhelming pleasure.
- Cum for me baby, come on, - Lily encouraged softly, curling her nimble fingers a slightest bit, hitting that one sweet spot inside of you, surely sending you right over the edge.
And with that a dam broke. Your body spasmed and trembled ferociously with mind-numbing pleasure penetrating deeply into every muscle, so you had to bite down on your own fingers to subside all the wanton moans treating to spill from your bitten lips. Your eyes shut tight and the only thing your could concentrate on was Lily’s gentle voice, guiding you right through your orgasmic delirium, and surely bringing you back to reality.
Heavy footsteps could be heard nearing the room you were currently occupying, and by the loud boisterous laughter you could tell that it was no other but infamous James Potter. Lily cursed under her breath, pulling your tank top, that was bunched under your armpits just enough to reveal your tits, back down, throwing Marlene’s heavy duvet over your lower half. She made a quick job picking up your long dismissed shorts and panties from the floor and shoving them underneath said duvet, hiding your clothes there.
Mere moments later a door bursted open, hitting the wall with a loud ‘bang’ followed by James’ quiet ‘ooops, sorry’. Gryffindor seeker looked around a messy room, his pretty curls bouncing every time his head moved, glasses sitting low on his nose.
- Lils, dear, here you are, - shouted James cheerfully, nearing red-haired girl in two wide steps and wrapping a bing arm around her mid-section. He places a chaste kiss on her temple before averting his attention from his girlfriend to you, slumping against numerous pillows piled on your bed, still panting heavily. - Y/n, love, you allright?
Curly-haired boy let go of his girlfriend, advancing you and feeling your forehead with the back of his hand, tutting at the unnatural warmth underneath his skin.
- I don’t think she is, she’s burning hot, - tutted Lily in feigned compassion. James nodded in agreement, retreating his hand from your face, a look of sincere worry etched on his handsome face.
- Y/n, it’s may, how did you manage to get a cold? - he chided softly, not really knowing how to help you. You only shrugged weakly, giving him a small smile.
- I think she just needs some rest. She’ll be as good as new after some sleep, won’t you, dear? - Lily inquired and you nodded fervently, agreeing with ginger-haired girl animatedly. - Jamie, can you leave us alone, so I can help this poor thing into shower? - she added, referring to a bespectacled boy who was standing completely lost and clueless in the middle of the room.
- You sure? Maybe I can help with something? I have these really cool cough drops mom sent me, I can go fetch ‘em, - James offered and you felt a little pang in your chest for being a reason why him and Lily couldn’t work out. Red-haired reassured him, that you didn’t have cough and she there was an effective antipyretic potion in her trunk, softly urging him to leave. James only nodded his head and hurried to withdraw from the room. - Get better soon, dear, - he said before shutting the heavy door behind himself, leaving you two alone again.
You met Lily’s green eyes - they were crinkling with amusement and something you couldn’t quite decipher - something sly and playful. She neared you in in a few quiet steps, sitting herself next to you on a soft bed, one hand came to rest on the side of your neck, thumb rubbing the angle of your jaw softly. You looked at her bashfully, eyes shining and cheeks deeply flushed from your recent orgasm paired a possibility of being almost caught by Lily’s boyfriend. Red-haired sight softly, moving her hand down your rapidly pulsing jugular and then heaving chest, fingertips ghosting over your hard fabric-clad nipples teasingly.
- Oh dear, you do look like you need some help. Maybe with my mouth this time, huh?
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stardustsymphony · 7 months
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if you're a marauders fan and you're on instagram and you don't know who ethan is, then what's the damn point
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padsmoony04 · 1 year
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Here I am, another day more bored, so again I started playing with Pickcrew and ended up making the marauders, hehe...
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So here we have Remus, James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, Regulus, Dorcas, Marlene and Mary. Hope you liked the perception I have of each one of them, I personally think they look pretty cool.
Fun fact: When I was 'building' Lily, the annoying and unimpressed face was the expression I thought she made every time James tried to ask her out, lol.
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Imagine: Lily Evans knowing that Peter Pettigrew betrayed it James and Y/n Potter Because he was jealous of their Marriage
Anonymous request: Hey I don't know if you write for the marauders but If you do can you write where instead of Lilly dying it's the reader so Lilly confronts Peter saying that she knows that he betrayed James and Y/n remus and sirius are confused and she tells them that peter is the reason that James and Y/n died since he was jealous of their relationship
"How can you live knowing you're the reason why James and Y/n are gone?"
"Lily, what are you talking about?" Sirius asked, confused
"Peter is the reason why James and Y/n are dead, he betrayed them."
"Come on guys don't believe her, she's lying." Peter says
"Why would I lie about something serious?" Lily raised an eyebrow
"You're hurting because you lost your best friend, that's why you're lying, saying that I betrayed them when I didn't." Peter defends himself
Lily looked at Sirius and Remus, "You guys do, believe me right?"
Sirius let out a deep breath "Lily, why would Peter betray them if he was friends with both James and Y/n."
"Maybe because he was jealous of their marriage, he always has been jealous of their relationship." Lily frustrates rolls her eyes
Peter glared at Lily, "see you're lying again, I was never jealous of their relationship and marriage."
"Oh really then why did you ask me to help you break up James and Y/n''s relationship knowing that Y/n was my best friend." Lily argues
"What Lily is saying it's the truth. I heard Peter say that." Remus remembers the day he walked on Peter asking Lily to help him
"Moony, how much money did Lily pay you? to get you on her side?" Peter asks mad
"Peter stop it. back when we were in Hogwarts. I remember you asking Lily to help you break up James and Y/n but Lily obviously said no." Remus says
Sirius closed his eyes for a second "Peter, please don't tell me you betrayed them because of your jealousy."
"Fine,Yes I betrayed them because James deserved it, but not Y/n." Peter confesses
"But why Peter?" Remus asks sadly
"Because James got everything that I wanted." Peter whispers
"Because of you Harry won't grow up with his parents because of your jealousy." Lily glares "but at least Harry has us."
"You had everything."
"But not Y/n."
"Just because you were jealous of James you didn't have the reason to betray them." Remus angrily tells Peter
"They trusted you so much that they made you the secret keeper only for you to betray them."
"Not only did you betray them. you also betrayed us. you betrayed our friendship as well, we don't want you as our friend anymore the friendship is over." Sirius tells Peter angrily
"Guys, please forget me, I regret doing it, I would never forget myself for betraying them if I could bring them back, I would." peter drops to his knees crying
"You should of thought about that."
"Peter leave we don't ever want to see you ever again stay away from Harry and us."
"Guys, please."
"Leave."
"I'm sorry guys I hope one day you guys could forget me." peter gets up from the floor and leaves
"I was thinking, let's buried James and Y/n together they were made for each so they deserve to be buried together agree or not agree to be honest I don't care I'll still do it with or without your agreement."
"I agree."
"I agree."
Lily smiles, "then let's do it."
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supergrathix · 9 months
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masterlist
HARRY POTTER:
cedric diggor:
nothing yet..
fred wesley:
nothing yet..
george wesley:
nothing yet
slythrin boys:
draco malfoy:
nothing yet..
blasie ( can’t spell his last name):
nothing yet..
theo not:
nothing yet..
tom riddle:
nothing yet..
mattheo riddle:
nothing yet..
you(tv show):
joe Goldberg:
nothing yet..
maraders:
james potter:
nothing yet.
remus lupin:
regulas black:
nothing yet..
sirius black:
nothing yet..
lily evan’s:
nothing yet..
celebrity:
cameron monaghan:
penn badgely:
nothing yet..
tom blyth:
nothing yet..
andrew garfield:
nothing yet..
adam driver:
nothing yet..
cillian murthy:
nothing yet..
mads mikkelsen:
nothing yet..
jacob elorid:
nothing yet..
request over celebritys
only do fem reader reader has no specific look
request page:
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supercool-here · 11 months
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hello. Does anyone know of a good HP fanfic about Severus Snape and Lilly Potter getting together and living happy? I know Harry wouldn't exist then but I find Alan Rickman very hot and for that reason I want Snape to be happy
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literaturewithliz · 2 years
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May I request snape with a tall female reader headcaons or one shot? Whatever suits you best.
Like she’s so tall and soft and a little insecure about her height making them stand out even more than necessary, just imagine a giant pretty fairy and an overgrown dungeon bat lol, and thank you regardless. 🤍🤍
Thank you for the request! Sorry it took so long!
Also, “overgrown dungeon bat” in now my favorite phrase and I will most definitely be stealing that (if it’s okay with you)
The reader gives Hufflepuff vibes, so imma headcanon her as that.
Also, I like the fact that it would just make them seem even more odd. A Hufflepuff and a Slytherin? *audible gasp*
But for real, screw the “the woman has to be taller than the man” stereotype
Anyways
You insecure? He’s not having that. I feel like he’d automatically assume it’s another person’s fault and that someone said something to you.
He’s still very suspicious even if you say no one said anything, but so help me god if someone DID say something to you and he found out or he was there? Good luck is all I’m gonna say.
He’s very skilled with hexes
Just saying
I feel like when it comes to cuddling, he’d wanna be the small spoon. And it has nothing to do with your height, I just think that’s something he’d enjoy. But would of course be big spoon if you needed it.
lovessss your softness. So much. Very refreshing, compared to his home life and the general vibe of the Slytherin common room.
I think that before y’all were official, he was very insecure about being seen with you only after some people from the Slytherins commented on it.
Then he apologizes in front of the entire school and asks you to be his s/o.
Lily smacked sense into him.
Speaking of Lily
Y’all were the original golden trio
Besties
She’s also a main source of confidence boost
Is always happy to provide them and will happily join Snape in warning those who are mean to you
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altyx · 1 year
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Hi anyone reading this!! I need help finding a James Potter x Reader fic 😭😭. It was a Little Women Au, it was so well written, I just wanted to reread it!! For a little context of the fic, it was reader as Amy, Lily as Jo and James as Laurie. It was also based on the scene when Laurie lets the cat out the bag to Jo about Amy and him getting married. If someone finds it can they please tag me, that would mean a lot 🙏🙏🤍!!
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miakataylor · 2 years
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I just finished the rough draft of a Marauders Christmas fic… when I tell you my heart broke when I wrote this, I mean my soul SHATTERED. Like… I felt every word I wrote. Aghhhhh
But anywho, it’ll be out by the end of this weekend, hopefully. 🖤
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Mauraders AU
Summary: Laine Crowley is the fifth member to the rambunctious 7th year Mauraders. Having to struggle with exams, a brewing war outside of Hogwarts and... boys, she intends to give herself a small respite by enlisting Sirius Black's help in getting her dumb friends together before it's too late, or so it would seem
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{Hi All! This is my first published Mauraders AU fanfiction on here. This was also written many years ago so please excuse any inconsistencies.
All constructive criticism is welcome.
I will be posting more often and requests are also welcome.
If you have any confusion please feel free to contact me directly and I'll clear it up, if anything in this fic is unclear.
Please reblog and share your thoughts! }
Word count: 4.3k
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For context, Laine is an Animagi too, she is an English starling of your preference.
She can also be considered a Y/n / reader at your discretion.
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Laine Crowley's first two weeks back at Hogwarts as a seventh year, was nothing short of excruciating.
Her dorm mate and friend, Lily Evans , would spend long hours droning on about one of her particular Maurading comrades. On this particular occasion she was thinking with this chain of thought, Lily had started with a poorly constructed attack on James Potter, to which Crowley was blatantly tuning out.
While she pretended to acknowledge the firey red-head beside her, they sat in the bustling Grifindoor common room on a particularly cold September evening.
Crowley had successfully completed her Advanced Charms essay an hour ago and was positively itching to research something of her own volition before her ears fell off.
She scanned the sea of red and black robed Grifindoors, hatching something of an impossible escape plan when she spotted something to make her jolt out of her stupor at an alarming speed. There, beside her fellow Mauraders he stood. Disheveled and disarming, making him appear all the more handsome. She allowed her eyes to traverse his body, toned with something like evolutionary power, raven hair spilling over his shoulders in soft waves that framed his sharpened jawline.
She felt her mouth quirk into a flirtatious smirk and then suddenly she was staring at Padfoot, one of her comrades and the wickedest boy she knew... and suddenly she made herself with all her might conclude that he was quite ordinary. QUITE uninteresting. She shook her head to herself, Evans had noticed this and began an entirely knew assault upon James as she watched him from across the room.
"Shut up Evans." Laine smirked. "Or he'll marry you." She doged a hefty pillow that came flying her way and managed to gain enough speed to peck Lily on her fuming ginger head and sprint to the other side of the common room, narrowly avoiding another object that sounded much like a copy of 'Avanced Charms of the ages' as it came to a thud upon the cobble.
"Another brush with death Starlette? Any more of these and I'll have to start on your eulogy." Said the smoky voice next to Remus and opposite James.
"Good with a pen are you Pads? That's poetic, i almost thought you were serious. " Moony sniggered, while Potter tried to catch his eye with a knowing smirk. Black held his hand to his heart in feigned dramatics.
"Your death would be a perfectly acceptable occasion to showcase my remarkable talent. You've got to SAVE these things Star." Laine scoffed.
"Well if ever I die Pads, I'll be sure to be heroic about it so you can publish that in your autobiography." Sirius smiled with a gut churning amount of charm.
"Why thank you, that's very sweet." Lupin cleared his throat with a look of terrible amusement adorned on his face.
"When you're done flirting with each other, do you still want me to go over your Arithmancy notes with you Laine, you know, before i'm old and grey?" She straightend herself off of the back of James's chair and dragged Remus to the edge of the common room.
Sirius watched her animatedly pour over endless piles of books, while Moony safe guarded her with his endless amounts righteous patience. He scowled, at least he was being smart about it. Sirius glanced towards a group of rowdy seventh year boys gawking at girls as they passed. Padfoot sighed, turning back to James, he discovered Wormtail had sat down at some point during his daydream and was looking more concerned than usual. He retuned into Prongs's conversation and immediately understood why.
"Look at her over there... She's just so perfect. Isn't she? Like I've said, this year is our year fellas!"
Sirius gafawed. "At least you know you've said it mate." He let his head sink down into his arms, breathing in the smell of polished wood and parchment.
He heard James go on some more, before Wormtail tripped over himself just trying to get away from Prongs ten minutes in. James, noticing the common room was sparcer and that Lily had retired to her dormitory some time ago, made the journey upwards to bed.
Sirius decided he was rather comfortable on the table and soon the sounds of footsteps retreating to the dorms faded as he slept.
"Sirius."
"Hm?" He felt two slender hands attack his forearm.
"Sirius Black!" He opened an eye gingerly, to find an almost disheveled as he was Laine, looking spectacularly hot at 1.00 o clock in the morning.
"Sod off Starship." He yawned and sat up, his head slipping backwards onto the chair back. "Actually I've got a better one... Not tonight dove, I've got an early day tomorrow." He smirked at her in the glow of the dimming fire." You know how you get."
Star rolled her eyes, rising from her haunches and hopping onto the table top in front of him.
"I've had a thought Pads..."
"Dear God, everybody take cover!"
"Shh-" "I mean it, keep quiet, or Thomson the 'picture perfect' prefect will actually do his job."
Sirius raised his hands in surrender, peering at her from between raven waves.
"What if they don't stop?"
Sirius shook his head. "Nah. That's too general a thought for this early in the morning. For all I know you could be talking about Minnie and her secret love-affair- don't look at me like that Stars, we know she goes into Hogsmeade along with the rest of us. Where does she go? I'll bet she's apparating off with some bloke-" Delicate fingers shoved his mouth closed, as icey eyes bore into him.
"Some professor. You've said and I'll bet on it too, but listen before we get caught; Lily is off her rocker this year and James is just pissing me off, if they never get together I will have to babysit him for the rest of my life," Sirius made to interrupt but was cut off by both of Stars hands crossing over his affronted mouth. "Yea, yea Pads I will because you'll have a stash of fire whiskey under your leather jacket and I DO NOT want to babysit both of you while Remus is being clever and living in the mountains." Black clasped both her wrists with his free hand used his other to secure them to his chest, bringing their faces only inches apart.
"And this plan of yours is what?" Suddenly Sirus understood, his eyes sparking beautifully and then suddenly darkening with irritation. "It's risky. Could be done... but if Lily finds out, she'll have our heads, love." Sirius watched as the petulant amber-haired girl in front of him knit her eyebrows together in offense.
"Hogsmeade, next week. And don't you dare call me 'love'. In no way is that allowed." Black tugged her forwards with a lazy pull, internally relishing in their proximity as she fell into his chest. As she looked up, clearly about to tear his head off, he set his soft lips to her snarled nose, threw her around so that she sat shakily where he had been moments ago and made a mad dash for the boys dorm stairwell.
In the last of the red glow of the fire, Crowley felt her face burn brighter than the sun as she touched nimble fingers to her attacked nose. She shook her head, irritated with herself for adorning a face-splitting smile. As she made her way up the stairs, into her nightgown and right into bed, her smirk would not fade, hard as she tried to be rid of it. "Bastard." She closed her eyes, heart beating right out of her chest.
The next week in waiting was spent in darkend corners after meals and in the bustling crowd before lessons, devising the most brilliant match-making plan that had ever been conceived.
Sirius and Laine had racked up a fair of favors and this little plot was rapidly diminishing them all.
"Worth it though." Sirius whispered during lunch on Friday. Laine ran her hands through her soft curls, leaving her fringe in a ruffle as it rested over her tired brow.
"Not for me. You know how many times I've had to steal Prongs cloak this week? Add that to my Arithmancy calculations list and this damn spell that STILL won't connect my power - source to any magical component- "
"And you say the Prongs and Red verbal vomit." Starlette glared as though she had never glared before. Sirius was rather intimidated, but he would admit he loved his mother before telling her that. So, he opted to raise his glass in salute as he lent over his potatoes.
"I've got a year Black. One year to get this power- source thing ready before this war gets out of hand, you know it will. Otherwise I'm living with Remus for the rest of my wizarding career."
"James and I would happily take you in Starship." He pouted.
"I wouldn't live with you idiots if I was married to you." Sirius sighed into his potatoes.
"Ouch." He watched her haughty, slender figure tense- as he'd known it to do when she was set she was righter than Dumbledoor himself- then he watched her glance towards him, he watched her pretty face relax slightly and he watched her offer a rare apology.
"Sorry Siri." He straightened up, leaning in with a devious amount of charm.
"Haven't heard that in a while, I almost forgot what you sounded like when you're submissive. Silly me." He winked... he was slapped.
"In the dog box again Pads? What's this, the four-hundred and - tenth time?" Sirius held his hand to his cheek as he looked at James, Remus and Peter standing over the other side of the table.
"Thrilled you've been counting." Padfoot was promptly much more interested in his mangled potatoes.
Crowley found herself once again in a complex discussion with Lupin over very old, very cumbersome runes, to which James was only mildly interested as he watched a particular stream of red hair fly angrily down the Grifindoor table. "Twice in one day Star, you are not an easy customer." James nodded towards the red-haired witch fast approaching their turf.
"Boys, help-" the four of them watched their fifth Maurader being hauled unceremoniously out of the Great Hall.
Sirius, suddenly feeling much more optimistic, discarded his potatoes and smiled brilliantly at his friends. "Desert boys?"
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"Did you, or did you not suggest that Slughorn ought to pair James and I up for his biological depiction of the effects Amortica, essay due at the end of term?"
"I did." Evans blazed on.
"-And don't bother denying it, I know you've been spent these last few- What?" Star smiled.
"Unless you want to hide something from Potter, it shouldn't matter. James was top of his class last year with his essay, if I may remind you, you were second. Slug thought it was a wonderful idea. Thought it would really inspire other students to do better than the best. I, HOWEVER thought it would allow me to have a few restful afternoons till Christmas."
"Oh, you are a right arse, you know?" With that, the tempestuous red fury was chasing a couple of first years out of her way as she quite literally stormed off to Defence Against the Dark Arts.
Crowley sighed. "Phase one in motion then." She said to nobody in particular.
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Friday evening was spent waiting in a cold, dark hall for a very late Sirius Black. Croewn practiced mentally cursing him in varying ways, commiting various crimes quite happily.
"Sorry love, Moony, Wormtail and I were trying to stop James having a fit."
"Why'd you tell him before hand?" She realized after she said it, that she was too cold to care how the question sounded innocent and slightly relieved as opposed to her usual scowling rage as Sirius arrived at an attractive jog, breath turning to mist in the depth of the dark hall.
"Cause I did not want to spend my Saturday morning telling James Potter to pretend he hadn't just heard Lily Evans would agree to go out with him." She laughed as she watched the pure dread collect upon his features, as though his gorgeous face was a pool of contemptuous dew upon a wavering leaf.
"Alright Pads, you've had a hard time, you poor baby." She lifted her hand to pat his cheek, unbeknownst to her, sending Sirius's stomach into a very painful series of backflips. Feeling exactly like he was being a baby, he shifted closer to her. She watched his eyes grow dark with lust- she'd seen him look at her like this before but this was one of those rare occasions where she wasn't allowed to bat at him til he left her alone.
"What no comeback? All flustered over there, pretty bird?"
"Bit. But you see here - my darling 'mutt'- i will not hesitate to- " Just a hallway down, a hefty door opened and shut, twin pairs of foot steps echoing towards them.
"Ready love?"
"Yes." It came out much breathier than she cared for. "Be nice alright?"
"No." Before she could think, his lips had stolen hers in an amount of passion that was so violent, it made her knees buckle. He caught her, just, backing them up into the nearest wall. It was icy cold in contrast to his body, which was pressed so close to hers it was as though he was her second skin.
With an absolutely tremendous effort, he pulled away from Crowley, she followed him for a moment, trying to disentangle her hands from his soft locks of ebony without flustering too visibly. "So tomorrow morning then?" He said, just as breathless as he looked. "And I'll get James to come along, make sure whoever you pick is good or I'll have it for the rest of my life."
Clearing the knot in her throat with a considerable effort, she said. "Sure, see ya Pads." With another heroic effort he made to leave Crowley alone where the next part of their plan she needed executed alone. "Sirius?"
"Yeah?" He felt as though he was choking. "Why now? Why have you suddenly had the urge to stop being Sirius Black?"
And with honesty he had never expressed before he said, "Becuase I like the Sirius Black I am when I'm with you, far better than any other kind." Star smiled as she watched his very attractive back dissappear into the darkness. She supposed that was true but this wasn't for them both, not yet anyways. Maybe they could reconsider when she didn't have three million and one things to worry about every other day.
"WHAT WAS THAT?" And here we go. She sighed and turned around to find Lily in pure shock and Marlene had seemed to escape the position of shock and move straight onwards to outrage.
After an unnecessarily long walk back to the common room, Crowley was freezing with what felt like an on-coming cold deep in her throat after hours of somewhat fabricated, somewhat truthful events that led to what her girl friends considered a completely diabolical withhold of information.
It took another several hours after that to convince Lily she didn't feel comfortable going out with Sirius alone (a complete lie, she would apologize later). Then another forty five minutes of in depth kissing discussion before she could, disgruntled and embarrassedly throw her pillow over her head and fail to go to sleep for many hours after that, wondering the same intrusive things, ' what was it like to make out with Sirius Black?'
10 o' clock rolled around faster than Star had expected.
She was being jostled awake by a pristinly gorgeous Lily, with layers of charmed curls resting over her red- coated, woolen scarfed chest. Crowley awoke as though she had been told several bunny rabits had just been slaughtered beneath her mattress, stormed off to tame her mane of fluffy amber waves, threw on some flowing, blue wizards robes and black coat and raced down the stairwell, landing at her friend's feet.
They were gathered around each other, chatting quite happily. James was egging Lily on, but she seemed to be taking it quite pleasantly. Star was much to tired to observe this fact properly.
Something bi-coloured and warm was thrust around her neck with a surprising amount of gentleness attached to the end of the motion. "Trust me, it's pelting out there." Said that smoky voice Laine had come to adore.
"Oh, thank you, fair enough really."
"What kind of a comeback is that?" She sighed into Black's scarf.
"A tired one." "Well, that's just no good darling. C'mon I have a brilliant idea." She smiled walking over the the portrait hole limply. James followed her with an unnoticed smirk in Lily's direction.
Sirius rounded on Lily. "Hope you got all the good stuff for the ringer you put my girl through." Lily smirked evilly up at him.
"Your girl Black?"
"Mmm, yea, well, I'm working on it."
The four of them landed themselves in the Three Broomsticks with several smuggled in Fire Whiskey's down in about an hour.
Lily and James were chatting happily about their shared potions project, while Star was practically falling over herself with exhaustion. "Mhm, we're geniuses Padfoot, you and me." She was tipsily falling right into Sirius's side, a thing he did not protest in the least.
"Yeah love, just not while you're tipsy."
"Me being drunk has nothing to do with your smarts mister!"
"Ever the argument darling."
"Of course, I grew up with you boys, needed to be quick. Hah!"
"Does that mean you practice these little flirting outbursts you and I have?" Sirius smirked.
"Noooooo, it means that I just like flirting with you." She spun her finger around in his face, poking it straight at his chest. Her eyes widened, a mischievous smirk appearing on her lips. "Oh, that's muscle you have there hound dog. Damn, I must be a lucky girl!"
Sirius smile could only be described as a thousand KwT smile as he pulled Laine to her feet. "Must be." She reached for her tankard and was promptly pulled further away from the table. "No. No. You've had enough love, James, bring your - bring Red and meet us outside." Prongs saluted him with a lopsided smirk and Lily smiled, bringing hers and James's tightly interwoven hands onto the table top as they made for the bar to pay.
"I was drinking that. I don't think it did me much good,but it's the principle Siri!" Sirius was fiddling with his coat, which seemed to have come into some miraculous form of disrepair. "Baaabbby." Sirius grimaced, finally letting slip a bark of laughter as he watched her serious face. "Don't think that now's a good time for nick names Crowley. Man, I wish I had that taped, Moony even showed me how to do it over the summer."
"No. No, I'm not loving you, I'm insulting you. I'm calling you a baby." Padfoot rolled his eyes much more dramatically than he intended to.
"Naturally." He sighed. What is James doing? He was rightfully peeved as he waited in the drizzle on the cobbled street. "Hey." He watched Star wander out of the covered awning and into the street, seemingly staring at her reflection in a puddle. "Hey! You brat, come here." She didn't reply, in fact she seemed to be scowling, slowly verging to falling over. "Come on, try to refrain from passing out. Please?" Still not a word. "Lightweight." He mumbled as he stepped out into the drizzle to collect her back to safety.
"Siri? Pads, i- Pads look here."
"No, look never mind our plan, James and Lily are getting along swimmingly, can we please go see Madam Pomfrey before you hit me for getting you sick?"
"What?" She turned to Sirius, eyes big and glassy. "Sirius, I'd never blame you for that. No way, I love you. You knew that, didn't you?"
Sirius had frozen, in fact, he had simply stopped working. His hands were clenched to Stars waist, he was getting soaked and he was far to exuberant to care. "Say that again." He turned her to face him, hands pressed into her rosy cheeks.
" Hey! Alright, alright. Sirius Black, I love you. Very much. I've thought about your stupid arse naked far too many times to count and I cannot remember for the life of me when I decided I couldn't date you, because you've grown into a remarkable young man and I've been thinking this for weeks and haven't told you because I love you too much to screw around with our relationship, but I am a pitiful lightweight and I bow to you for your alcohol tolerance."
Far too much was going on inside his brain at this moment. So, he decided to bet on the safest option. He slammed his lips into hers, overwhelming passion and requited love pouring out of his very soul.
He had grown up. Enough to know he needed a partner and the countless times he could recall her just that was enough to give him a radical reality check. He had wanted Laine Crowley since she had saved their lives with extraordinary skill and courage in their fourth year. He had tried desperately to be rid of that notion, to tell himself he needed time to grow up before he dared touch her. He smiled into their kiss. He was grown up now.
"I love you Laine. I have loved you for a stupid amount of time and I want you to know- oh, you're not actually drunk are you?" She smiled, her hands resting on his as they caressed her cheeks. "Well, no. A bit, but otherwise no." Sirius glowered.
"That's news to me."
"Yeah well you were too nervous to get your 'ead out of yer arse."
"Please, like you were any better!"
"I was actually." She smirked, not daring to move his hands from her face.
"Ooo, you brat. You are so dead."
"Now hang on, you were saying you loved me a moment ago, don't spoil it." His face was nothing short of pure bliss.
"You little twat, before anything else you are so dead!" She peppered kisses to his palms, with a growing satisfaction forming in her belly as she watched his cheeks tint pink.
"I do love you, i can still kill you." He wrenched her towards him, kissing her until neither of them could breath, it was only when she was wriggling in his grasp did he remove his tongue from her throat.
"I'm running away now." Crowley panted.
"Nuh-uh. I'm not done being mad at you for entrapment."
"Well, to be fair, it was Lily's idea. "
"Yes, thank you, I put two and two together."
Just then the door burst open with a window shuddering force. "FINALLY!" James cheered. He turned to Lily, "What I tell you Lilypad? Pay up." Lily exchanged a jingling pouch for a full on kiss on the lips.
"Hang on-" Star gafaws "Oh hush, Jamie and I have been dating for ages. I thought you noticed last week when you put us together for potions but, then there I was talking to James and we figured it out." Lily beamed at them.
"You double dating, double crossers. That whole ordeal put me through a lot of stress." Sirius glared at James who pranced over to his two best friends and slung his arms around their shoulders.
" You lot thought Lily and I were getting annoying? No way. I could only take those forlorn, puppy love eyes for so long, so while Lils was bucking up the courage to say we were a shagging-"
"James Fleamont Potter!"
"Ah, sorry. Anyways, that we were, no longer uselessly separated. We decided to get you so irritated with us you'd have to get together to have somebody sensible to talk to." Lily smiled at the three people in front of her.
"Didn't expect you to try to get one over on us though."
"I'll imagine that was quite funny Red."
"Yes Sirius. It really was. You were beautiful."
Sirius smirked. "Sadist."
"Felon." She remarked back.
James shook the both of them on his either side. Sirius seemed to have givin in and was enjoying his friends victory.
"Prongs, stop. Or I really will be sick." There was some clamor to make sure Star was in good health, James and Sirius were never so protective of anyone other than Laine Crowley when she wasn't feeling well.
After she had convinced them that she wasn't dying and that it would be wise to find something else to do before she strangled them, Remus and Peter arrived.
Remus looked positively delighted, Peter positively confused. "So who decided to stop being an idiot first.
"Sirius."
"Laine." They spoke simultaneously and burst into a fit of giggles all the same.
"Nevermind. I'm glad I don't have to spend long hours soothing either of your aching souls anymore. That was worse than James."
"No?" Star protested. There was a collective 'yes', as even Peter seemd to have caught on, while Sirius simply wore a wry smile.
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"You owe me a bedtime story." They sat in front of the fire, well into the night when every one had retired to their dorms.
"Yeah?" Sirius waited til Star had finished kissing his jawline, to answer.
"Mhm. How you put all your effort into flirting with me instead of bagging me?" Black scoffed.
"Would you have said yes to the play boy?" Eyes drooping in the firelight she smiled, a coy glint flickering over her face.
"No. But I would've let you bag me."
Sirius rolls his eyes. "Now you tell me." Star flops down into his lap, wrapping her fingers around his hand, securing it firmly against her chest. "G'night, my darling Pads. "
"Not a mutt anymore love?"
"Nah, she yawned, " you're too pretty for that."
He smiled, never loving anything more than her.
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Thank you to all those who read to the end!
Please let me know if you'd like to see more content like this!!
Fin
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dietcokesports · 2 years
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Hey darlings :D
I may or may not have lied on my last post but we can move past that🤪
Anyways please send in scenarios and I might be able to stew up some writing in my noggin <3
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sunnami · 8 months
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❝i am half-agony, half-hope. . . i have loved none but you.❞
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summary: how the marauders loved you in their time. featuring harry potter the time-traveller and sixth-wheel.
pairing/s: poly!marauders + lily x reader.
tags: reader is referred to as she/her and a mother throughout the whole fic[!], reader is a violent gremlin who craves blood but the marauders love you for that, implied child abuse[!], mentions of blood and violence[!], disgustingly sappy poetic fluff, no angst, happy ending, not proofread we die like finnick odair, edited: very minor detail.
note: there is little plot, it’s just the marauders and their adoration for you. thank you all so much for your kind responses to my first marauders fic :(( ilysm! i hope you enjoy this one as well! because there are parts when i was writing that i ended up kicking my feet in the air and smiling to myself.
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“MY NAME IS HARRY POTTER. I come from twenty-years in the future, you’re my mum — one of my ‘em, actually. It’s complicated. And you’re married to James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Sirius Black.” 
You blink. 
“Get the fuck out of my room!” 
Harry James Potter has dodged many things in his life. Killing curses, jinxes, girls, Draco Malfoy, and Dudley’s sloppy punches, but he’s never had to dodge his sixteen-year-old mother’s fuzzy slipper before. (Godric, that sounds weird, even in his head.) He doesn’t know precisely how he arrived here. In the Slytherin common room, to be exact, in your dorm. Harry remembers duelling with Death Eaters, Hermione calling his name, and a flash of light hitting him square in the chest, then he remembers waking up in the cold tiles of the snake dungeon. He nearly throws himself off the window when he meets your eyes, bleary from interrupted sleep — it’s not often he gets to meet [read: one of] his dead parents, after all, three had been brutally murdered by Voldemort, and one killed by his own loony cousin. He misses Sirius, though. A lot. And right about now, he could do with some of Hermione’s nagging and brilliant plan-making. 
At present — or past, Harry guesses — he watches you scramble out from your duvet, hand clumsily reaching for your wand as you snarl at him. He wonders if his mother knows that he’s encountered other creatures far more threatening than her. Oh shit, he realizes with all the forces of an angry Hermione Granger, isn’t this the last thing he’s supposed to do? But, well, Harry has given, and given, so much of himself all for the greater good — just this once, he’d like to see his parents alive and well. Even if they were currently trying to blast him into the walls. 
“If you’d just let me explain, mum—!” Harry pleads, nearly dropping his glasses after dodging one of your stinging hexes. Godric, you’re crazy. “Please!” 
“Stop calling me that!” You screech, eyes set ablaze.  Harry finds that you’re quite dynamic with your attacks. A hairbrush, followed by a stinging jinx, then a thick History of Magic textbook — which rudely hits him in the face, but he doesn’t dare complain because you’re his mother, and he’s respectful like that — and after you’ve exhausted your breath, running him into a corner, and your nostrils flare with the stubbornness of a lion, you point the tip of your wand at him. “If this is another one of the Prewett’s shitty pranks, I want you to leave! You are in the girls’ dormitory beyond midnight, and so help me, if you aren’t walking out that door in the next five seconds, I will kill you and string you up by your bottoms for everyone in school to see! Maybe all your stupid rumours of me being a Death-Eater might come true after all!” 
“You’re a Death-Eater?” Harry asks dumbly. 
You growl furiously, and Harry figures that was not the right thing to say. “I wonder what McGonagall would say if I delivered your head to her on a silver platter.” 
“Professor,” Harry corrects with a toothy grin. “Professor McGonagall.” 
You slam his head against the wall.
Definitely the wrong thing to say. 
Harry groans, little Dobby heads floating around his vision. Why was this so much harder than actually facing Voldemort? Quick, he needed to think of something, otherwise he’d end up eviscerated to ashes on your cold, stone floors. Harry is pretty sure you’d use his remains as decoration to send off a message to your enemies. 
“You hate your father,” Harry slurs through the pain, remembering Remus’s stories of how you were the gentlest magical being he’s ever had the privilege to love — now that Harry thinks about it, Remus was being extremely biased, nothing about you is gentle at all. “He’s forcing you to marry someone old enough to be your grandfather. You love to read Muggle literature but had to stop when your father burnt your whole collection of books. Your favorite novel is Persuasion by Jane Austen. It’s the one book you carry with you everywhere, you could never get tired of it.”  
Your grip on his shoulders falters, but the fury in your eyes crackles. “This isn’t funny.” 
“It’s not meant to be funny, mum,” Harry croaks, voice cracking pathetically — strange how this is the most he’s ever uttered the word, mum; it’s a peculiar string of letters, foreign on his tongue. “You have tremors in your left leg from when your father cast the Cruciatus curse on you. One of your dearest friends is a Hogwarts house-elf named Pipley. You cheated on your Transfiguration essay once, and—” 
“That’s enough!” You bark, eyes narrowed in dangerous slits. “I don’t know where you heard those from, you creepy, little stalker, but if you want to keep breathing, then I suggest you shut up.” 
Harry scoffs — you don’t understand. Everything he’s learned about you is from Sirius and Remus. They talk about you with whispered devotion, your name like a prayer on their lips, their eyes glazed with wistfulness as though they could see you reaching out for them — but you were dead in Harry’s time. Yet, you might as well have been alive with their tales of you. 
(“She’s a different kind of beautiful,” Sirius had said, a year after breaking out from Azkaban, sitting by the fire in Grimmauld Place, taking a swig of decade-old firewhiskey, “The kind of beautiful you don’t want to take your eyes off from because you’re afraid she’ll disappear from your eyes. But you won’t forget her, oh no, you’ll memorize the freckles and moles on her skin, the scars from her years, the light in her eyes, and the way she holds her head up high. You should have seen her, James, she. . . she was — is glorious.”) 
“I told you,” says Harry firmly — although he loves his mother very much, she’s beginning to wear him out, “My name is Harry James Potter, I come from twenty-years in the future. You are one of my parents.” A lightbulb flashes in his head. He squirms in your hold, reaching for his robe pocket until he finds the thing he’s looking for. Harry dangles the ring in front of you, grinning in success when your eyes flash in recognition. “It’s—” 
“A family heirloom,” You say breathlessly. The alexandrite winks under the light, a familiar gold band with the Latin inscription of your House words. “Where did you steal this from?” 
Harry rolls his eyes. “You left it for me in my Gringotts vault. It’s my heirloom now. You have to believe me, there’s no way you can deny this.” 
You take a step backwards, nibbling on your lower lip, as you stagger to your bed — Harry nearly stumbling to catch you in case you fell; adjusting to the living proof of time travel was quite difficult, he, of all people, should know. He exhales, dragging a hand down his face. “Magic, amirite?” 
You throw a pillow at him, which he catches gracefully thanks to his Seeker reflexes, as you plop down in the comforts of your quilts. “Sleep. The other girls won’t be back until the end of the holiday. We can deal with whatever this is in the morning. It’s way too early for me to process the idea of a future Potter spawn following me around.” 
Harry smiles. “Yes, mum.” 
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ONE THING THAT his fathers failed to tell him about you, and that Harry had to learn himself, was that you took ages to get ready. You sat on the chair in front of your vanity mirror, the birch wood legs whittled with snakes, and it was as though you had a Sticking Charm on the cushion. Harry didn’t know there could be so many creams, oils, and serums, and powders one put on their face. He blanches when you turn to offer him a cream for his under eyes. (“Suit yourself.” You shrug, turning to brush your cheek with dusts of pink. “Just saying, those dark circles aren’t doing you any favors.”)
“What am I like in the future?” You ask, a kind lilt to your voice, much like a warm hug, much like home. 
Harry stiffens, shoving his hands in pockets of the robes that were twice his size — you had given him the garments of Lucius Malfoy to change in, which you apparently had stolen from his room. It’s come full circle, really, the Sorting Hat had once told him he would be great in Slytherin, and now here he was, looking fabulous in green — because he was about to hurl at the feel of the velvet on his skin, knowing slimy Lucius Malfoy had worn it. (“No son—” You pause with a tight purse in your lips, as if you still can’t accept the fact. Harry doesn’t blame you. “—no son of mine will be parading around in red of all colors, future or not.” And Harry finds that he really doesn’t care, so long as you call him your son.)  
“Loved,” replies Harry gruffly, avoiding your eyes in the reflection of your mirror — they were piercing. One look and Harry wanted to spill all of his deepest, darkest secrets. He remembers the photographs in his album, the one he’s stared at so many times as a child. It’s a moving photograph of the five of you, fresh out of Hogwarts, each wearing a smile that stretched from ear-to-ear. Before Sirius and Remus, it was the only semblance of proof that Harry had — that you had once been alive. Remus is holding you by the waist in the picture, twirling you around as autumn leaves fell. You were — are — loved, and Harry thinks there’s no better description than that. 
(“I bloody hated her cat,” says Remus with a roguish quirk to his lips, regalling Harry with more talks of his parents. “Sirius, too. We just never got along with the little creature. But your mother loved it, and we would have done anything to make her happy. She deserved it, you see. She deserved more than what I had to offer her, but still she chose me anyway. And I am a selfish man, Harry, I crave glimpses of her and the whispers of her voice. She has made me a mad man whose only reprieve is her touch.”) 
You hum knowingly. “Stupid question, I guess. Since you aren’t allowed to reveal anything more about the future.” You sigh, gracefully threading your arms in the sleeves of your shirt, a green tie in the center of your collar. “Except, of course, when you gave me a heart attack in the middle of the night by telling me the last thing I want to become — no offense, I just don’t see how a relationship with those rowdy bunch would work. They get on my nerves far too much for me to ever feel anything other than disgust.” 
Harry doesn’t need a mirror to see that his expression has contorted in confusion; brows knitted and upper lip crinkled. By their memories of you, you all were madly in love in Hogwarts. Damn. This just made his trip to the past a lot harder. No maze seems to be ever just a maze. 
Luckily, you don’t notice him brewing a grand master plan to bring his parents together. Instead, you say, “But you don’t seem to be phased by any of this. If I had been thrown twenty years into the past, I would have puked my guts out twice at some point.” 
“Thanks for the image,” says Harry with a scowl. Truthfully, it had either been a present with a noseless Dark Lord to face, trauma to unpack but really never have the chance to, or a past where all of his parents were alive, and a chance to talk with them for however long he has. He knows where he’ll be staying, thank you very much. 
“Anytime,” You reply with an impish smile. 
Your heels pad across the floor as you walk over to him, mouth clicking as you pat the top of his head, full of wild, untameable Potter hair. “You need a trim soon,” You mutter, frowning, as you brush the thick strands away from his eyes, then you gasp — and Harry knows exactly what’s coming next. “Oh, you’ve got Evans’s eyes. That’s freaky.” 
“I know.” Harry grins. 
“Here’s the plan,” You say as you lead him out of your room, making sure no one saw him walking out of your door and getting the wrong impression — because that would be so wrong on many levels, but also, explaining to someone else that the person beside you was a time-traveller was just complicated in general. The Slytherin dungeon is unfamiliarly familiar, eerily quiet, as the two of you made your way out. “Just say you’re Potter’s distant relative, twice or thrice removed, and you’ve always been here. If you lie to their faces enough, they’ll believe it eventually.” 
“Will that work?” Harry doesn’t really mind — he needs a connection to James, his father, if he’s going to work out a connection between you and the others, because at the moment, it doesn’t seem like you’re too fond of them. There’s a tick on your jaw every time you mumble the word, Potter. Nevertheless, Harry decides he’s going to spend the duration of the holiday break trying to set you up with them — on the list of most insane things he’s ever done, living out the Parent Trap was high up the tally. 
You shrug. “They’ve fallen for less.” 
(“She’s got this adorable habit when she lies,” Sirius tells Harry, whipping up a stack of pancakes for their breakfast — Remus browsing through the morning paper. It’s the closest he’s ever been to a normal family. “It’s not obvious to her, of course, but I know her more than I know my own name. So we play along with it.” For a moment, he stops drizzling the maple syrup on the well-cooked batter, gazing at Remus fondly. “D’you remember that, Moony? She led us straight to one of her pranks, and we ended up covered in slug slime. She was so obvious — with her adorable fucking giggles. I need help with Charms, she said, and we knew right away it was a set-up. But it didn’t matter. I’d happily let her lead me to my ruin.”)  
The Great Hall is the same as Harry remembers. Now that most have returned home for the holidays, those who stay back mingle with students from other Houses, sharing meals under the bewitched ceiling, their low murmurs and hushed Christmas greetings bouncing off the walls. Harry scours the four tables to find a hint of blazing red hair, or the scent of impending trouble. Fortunately, he doesn’t have to search very far. As fate would have it, James Potter finds you — and where he is, Sirius Black is sure to follow. 
You’re barely seated when James comes bounding over to your table — more precisely, he struts, and Harry is horrified to ever be proven wrong by Snape, of all people. He ignores the roll of your eyes as he drags a leg over the bench, sitting to face you as Sirius occupies the space to your left before Harry can even sit down. He can’t even fathom how weird it is to see his parents as rambunctious teenagers. Lovesick, rambunctious teenagers. 
“Morning, dove.” James preens under your glare, stealing a grape from your bowl with a boyish smirk. His hair looks as though he’s ran his hand through it many times. “You look ravishing today.” 
“As always,” Sirius pipes in. “But that eyeshadow really isn’t complementing your skin tone, my darling.” 
You smile at him, right before your lips twist into a cutthroat sneer. “Piss off, Black.”
James stifles a laugh as he shovels a mass of potatoes on your plate, then pumpkin pasties, and slides a steaming cup of Dragon Well tea in front of you. 
“What the hell are you doing, Potter?” You reach over to smack his arm when he sprinkles apple slices and bacon on your breakfast. 
“What does it look like?” James smiles lopsidedly. “You need to eat more, honey.”
(In the future, Sirius will tell Harry, “It started off as a joke, a way to get on her nerves — but then, it just became this thing about taking care of her, making sure she got enough sleep before her tests, wondering if she had breakfast or dinner, staying with her in the library, walking her to the Slytherin common room, and sending her stupid notes just to make her laugh. You don’t get it, Harry. I’d give my every breath to ensure her life. We all would.” Harry doesn’t see Sirius any more during that evening, but he hears a bottle crashing against a wall, cracking into a million pieces, and the masked sound of Sirius sobbing, and Harry decides to leave him alone for the night.) 
Then, you tear your eyes away from James — he huffs, pushing your plate to you, mildly annoyed that you’ve deprived him of your eyes; they were his favorite part of you, you see, so expressive and full of life; James thinks you put the stars to shame — and thankfully, you remember that Harry still exists. You lightly smack Sirius’s leg until he gives Harry some room to sit. “Potter, meet other Potter. It’s the holidays, shouldn’t it be the perfect time to let go of House prejudices and spend time with family?” 
James looks at Harry up and down. “You must be from dad’s side of the family with all that hair.” 
Harry lets out a breath of relief. That was easy — way too easy. When he takes the vacant space in between you and Sirius, you dump all the available food on his plate, just as James had done for you. 
“Eat,” You say with a tone of finality. “You look like the wind could snap you in half.” 
“Yes, m—” Harry stops himself before he could finish his sentence, avoiding Sirius’s curious gaze. 
“Wow.” Sirius pokes Harry in the shoulder and in the cheek. “You really look like a mini-James, you’ve even got his terrible eyesight.” 
“Oi!” 
Your fork clatters against the silverware as you turn to Sirius with a shrill. “Not that I do enjoy your company — because, trust me, I do not want you here at all and would very much prefer if you got out of my sight — but why are you here? The Gryffindor table is over there. Unless your housemates finally got sick of you, Potter, which I can definitely see happening.” 
James chuckles, tossing another grape in his mouth without taking his eyes off you. “It’s as you said, isn’t it? It’s the time for putting aside House prejudices. And I think it’s a lovely day to enjoy a meal with my favorite snake.” 
“Drop dead,” You retort, digging into your chicken with a little more force than necessary. 
“Oh, dove.” James shakes his head, a teasing grin pulling at his lips. “It’s cute that you think death will keep me from you.” 
(Harry’s been told before, probably by Sirius, that this line had been wedged into his wedding vows for you. “A dramatic one, James was,” Sirius chuckles to himself one morning, Harry and Hermione listening intently, “He always said he’d rather die than ever hurt her. There was this time in seventh year, they had a fight — it was ugly — and she had ignored him for a week. James cried in Remus’s arms begging him to cut his heart out, saying that he didn’t deserve to keep on breathing, not after making you cry.”) 
“That is so creepy,” You say in disgust, scrunching your nose. Sirius chortles at your side. “I still wonder why Evans agreed to go out with you.” 
“It’s all part of the charm, dove.” James winks. “It’s all part of the charm.” 
Harry wants to barf, actually.
After breakfast, James then decides to introduce Harry to Lily, Remus, and Peter. (He’s gonna need the patience of a saint to not Avada Kedavra that rat on the spot.) Harry had spent the whole morning watching Sirius peel oranges and give them to you with a smitten look in his eyes — naturally, you gave whatever Sirius offered you to Harry, and each time Padfoot would visibly wilt. If he were in his Animagus form, Harry thinks he would be whining by now, tongue out and all. James and Sirius follow after you like lost puppies when you extricate yourself from the table.
“Where are you going?” James calls, hot on your heels as you leave the Great Hall.
“Away from you, Potter!” 
And James actually sighs when you turn the corner and disappear from their peripheral vision. Seconds later, he turns to Harry with a blinding smile, “She’s definitely charmed.”
Harry chortles.
“Well, come on then!” James guffaws as he wraps an arm around Harry’s neck — this is so, so strange. They begin walking in the opposite direction of where you went. “I still can’t believe we’ve got another Potter here and in Slytherin. I think I would have remembered Minnie calling your name during the Sorting Ceremony. What year are you in?” 
He’s supposed to start his sixth-year in a few weeks. “Fifth.” Technically. 
“We should ask Lily,” says Sirius, hands in his pockets and ebony ringlets tickling his nape. “She’s got the best memory out of all of us.”
It’s odd, Harry thinks, meeting the person who’s got his eyes — or the other way around, as people have told him. It’s like someone carved out the emeralds of Lily Evans’s eyes and bestowed it upon Harry for safekeeping. She sits beside Remus Lupin, head resting on his shoulder, hands clasped together, as they enjoy the shade. Nex to them, oblivious to their intimate conversation, is Peter Pettigrew — with his rosy, cherub cheeks and innocent blue eyes; not at all the image of a pathological, cowardly liar. Their heads snap in attention as James boisterously cries for their name. 
“Marauders — and Lily-pad — meet ickle Potter.” James lightheartedly whacks Harry on the back, to which Harry feels his lungs spill out from his mouth, he’s sure there’s an imprint of his father’s hand on his back now. 
“There’s two Potters in Hogwarts?” Sea-green eyes look at him in scrutiny as Lily knits her brows. “How even is the castle still standing?” 
James cackles like it’s the best joke he’s ever heard in his entire life, slapping his knee for dramatic effect. Oh, well, at least they’re buying Harry’s half-baked lie. At this point, it’s not even baked, it’s just wet, soggy, and poorly done. “Good one, Lily-pad!”
Sirius ruffles Remus’s shaggy blonde hair, canines bared in a wide grin. “This one here’s Moony, uptight prefect in the morning and absolute beast in the evening.” 
Harry blanches. Surely he was talking about his furry problem, right? Right? 
Remus doesn’t even flinch, just peels off Sirius’s hand from him and extends his hand out to Harry. “Please do not mind him. Remus Lupin, nice to meet you. Although, I can’t believe this is the first time we’ve met. We would have definitely remembered if we had another Potter in our midst.” 
“It’s true, we Potters are just hard to forget,” says James, smiling cheekily. 
Harry pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue. “Mum didn’t take the Potter name. I’m part Dursley. Muggle.” 
Lily hums, toying at the ends of her bright hair. “Dursley, huh? What a familiar name.” 
“It’s a common one,” Harry assures her — not at all the names of the people who would take him in after they died. And make his life miserable. 
“I suppose you’re right,” says Lily, unconvinced. 
“And this is Peter.” James introduces the boy eagerly, pride in his voice — as though this isn’t the person who literally allies himself with Voldemort. As if Peter won’t betray his friends all because of fear. 
“N–Nice to meet you,” Peter stammers with a nervous fidget, “Any family of James is a friend of ours.” 
Harry’s eye twitches. 
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IT IS ALMOST COMICAL — the way their eyes land on your figure, bursting through the courtyard from the corridors, winter cloak swishing with every step, tendrils of hair swaying in the crisp wind, and head held up high, thick books under your arms. You pause in front of the Marauders, face blank, then you turn to Peter, greeting him with a: “Hello, only Gryffindor I can tolerate.” 
Peter’s cheeks burn a saccharine hue of pink. Oh, no, no, no — absolutely not — Harry will not stand for a little crush Peter Pettigrew has on his mother. He needs James to act now. “Hi,” Peter replies shyly. 
Lily quirks her lips. “Hello, princess, see your score for the Astronomy test yet?”
You scowl. “Zip it, Evans.” 
The sound of Lily’s laughter fills the atmosphere — it’s the sort of melody that makes flowers bloom in deserts. “Had a bit of difficulty with the star charts?” 
Sirius pinches your cheek — Harry thinks you’re going to murder him on the spot. “Difficulty? I think this one just slept through the whole thing.” 
James snickers. “Must have been one hell of a nap, princess. You were drooling on my jumper.” 
“I most certainly do not drool!” You gasp, appalled, eyes wide as you step away from Sirius.
Sirius rolls his eyes. “What? Is drooling too barbaric for the pretty, little pure-blooded princess now? Newsflash, pet, you’re just as human as we are.” 
“Oh, you horrible, loathsome, infuriating—” You whip around to beat his chest with the course book in your grasp — it’s the kind of book Hermione would consider for light reading. 
“Irresistibly attractive—?” Sirius supplies for you, grin widening with as he captures your wrist with his hands. 
“In your dreams!” You shrill. 
You exhale slowly, eyes closing, chest rising when you take a sharp inhale. You open your eyes and stare straight at Harry — for a moment he fears that you’ll bite his head off. “Harry, dear, will you accompany me to the library? I think I’ve found something important regarding your situation.” 
Harry nods. “Is it time already?” 
“Yes,” You say firmly. “And time is of the essence. Come on.” 
“Wait!” Lily calls out to you as you turn to head back to the castle, Harry in tow — he tries to avoid the way James is glaring at your linked arms. “Hogsmeade next week?” 
Your jaw falls to the ground — this must have been unrehearsed, if the others’ reactions were anything to go by; Remus had dropped his book in shock, Sirius looked like he couldn’t decide between applauding Lily’s bravery or shaking her, and James was somehow frozen in time. “Excuse me?” 
“You’re excused, princess,” says Lily, dimples poking out of her cheek as she takes another step towards you. “You, me, Hogsmeade. A date. I’m sure you’ve gone on one of those before.” 
Harry elbows your stomach as you stare at Lily in shock. It takes a few moments to break you out of your stupor. “A–And what makes you think I’ll just go with you?” 
Lily shrugs. “I’m fit. Aren’t I, Remus?” 
“The fittest,” says Remus without missing a beat. 
You laugh incredulously. “Do you just expect me to go along with this? You’re mad, Evans.” 
Harry glares at you. You need to go along with this. 
“Are you scared, princess?” Lily’s face is inches away from yours, noses almost touching — Harry doesn’t know if he should keep watching this painful way of flirting — as she grins at you, happiness barely contained within her eyes. 
To your credit, you don’t back down. (Harry has to say this for the masses: he saw your gaze flitter down to Lily’s lips for a split second.) “Stop calling me that, Evans.” 
“One date, then.” 
You growl in exasperation, eyes flickering to the boys behind her back — pretending not to hear their conversation. “I suppose I’ll have to deal with them as well?” 
Lily beams and Harry swears sunflowers could grow in her direction. “We’re a package deal.” 
“Unfortunately,” You utter — but Harry notices it, the lack of venom in your voice. You straighten your posture, nose lifted haughtily, “I choose where we’re going.” 
“Done.” The sun peeks out from the cloud just as Lily smiles at you. 
“And I want to—” 
“Done,” Remus interjects raspily, peering up at you from underneath his lashes. “Anything you want, it’s yours.” 
You fight a growing smile, but continue, “If we’re going out in public, you’re going to have to wear—” 
“Done,” says James giddily, he looks as though he could kiss you in front of everyone without a care in the world.  
“You can’t just agree to anything I say!” You flap your arms in frustration. 
“Yes, dear,” Sirius teases. 
“Do you know how much you piss me off, Black?” You squawk. “Because you are this close to—”
“You are so fucking beautiful,” Sirius confesses, every pretense shed raw from his skin, sincerity pouring from his words. 
“I—” You falter, heat rushing to your cheeks. “You’ve gone mad.” 
“It’s your fault, dove,” says James, eyes twinkling like crescent moons as he smiles. “You best take accountability for this.” 
“You’re incorrigible — all of you,” You say as you avoid their gazes.
(But they were yours. Past, present, and future. They loved you so much that their soul was no longer their own — it was yours; yours to keep, yours to break, and yours to love. It would be unjust to ask them why they loved you. Do we ask why the sun rises each day without rest? Do we ask a daisy to stop blooming, or a tree to stop growing after it has endured storms and floods? After all, we do not ask why humans follow the light in a tunnel shrouded in darkness.) 
“Come on, Harry, let’s go.” You reach for his hand, he notices immediately that the tips of your ears are pink, and your palms are warm with sweat. He barely sees Peter wave goodbye before you tug him in the direction of the castle entrance. 
“Wait up!” Remus catches up to you two in quick strides, offering to carry your books for you — not that you agree, stubborn Slytherin that you are. “I’ll walk you to the library.” 
“There’s no need for that, Lupin, thank you.” You dodge his eyes, lips tightly pressed together, nails slightly digging into Harry’s arm. 
“Remus,” He says with a twinkle. “Call me Remus.” 
“Alright.” You pause. “Remus.” 
(In that moment, Remus wonders if you remember decking Lucius Malfoy in the face to defend him in your fourth year. He didn’t think he deserved to even breathe in the same air as you — the pure-blooded princess, dressed in clothing worth more than his life, adorned in jewelry he could only dream to afford, raised to believe she was better than everyone else. Then, you beat up Evan Rosier the next month in the courtyard, eyes ablaze, extravagant silk marred with grass stains and mud, and knuckles split open. You spit blood on the ground, looking at Lily then back at Rosier. “Red,” You say, kicking him one last time in the stomach, unafraid of McGonagall’s wrath growing louder and louder. “Just like everyone else. Like those Muggleborns you fear. We’ve all got dirty blood, Rosier. Suck it up.” 
“I’ll tell your father about this!” Rosier bellows through bloody teeth. 
“Tell him!” You grab his neck and slam your forehead against his. “Tell him that I decide my own future now!”
Remus doesn’t even have to think about it. 
He falls in love.) 
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FUNNILY ENOUGH, IT’S LILY who gives you her heart first, before anyone else does. It’s the last month of her first year at Hogwarts — it still hasn’t quite sunk in yet that she was a witch. Her, not Petunia, but her — Lily Evans, the witch. Apparently, some people can’t believe it either. A girl from Ravenclaw calls her this foul word, she’s heard it a few times now but it always hurts the same. James and Sirius get into a fight for her honor, now faced with detention later this evening. But she can’t help but wonder, what if they were right? What if she really didn’t belong in this world? It was too good to be true, anyway. Perhaps she’ll just run a flower boutique with Petunia.
“Oi.” 
The sound of your voice startles her, and she nearly topples over in the Great Lake. Lily catches sight of your Slytherin colors and resigns herself to another round of name-calling. “What do you want?” 
“They’re wrong, you know,” You tell her, ignoring Lily’s question. You look down on her with your nose raised arrogantly — she wishes she could be like you. Born to be magic. “You’ve got a terrifying brain locked up in your head there, Evans. And they know it, too. They’re scared.” 
Lily scoffs. “I’m just a Mudblood to them. There’s nothing to be intimidated by.” 
You sneer. “Don’t say that word. You’re more than that. More than them. They’ve got long ways to go to prove they have a place in this world. But you — you’ve defied the odds and you were destined to become magic. You don’t have to prove anything. You have the right to be in the wizarding world and no one can take that away from you.” 
Then, you pivot on your heels, not bothering to hear her reply. “You’re my rival now, Evans. Do keep up. We’ve got an Astronomy test tomorrow. I look forward to seeing how you do then.” 
Lily just gapes. She’s certain there’s butterflies in her stomach. Her heart thumps wildly against her ribcage. Lily raises her hands to feel her blushing cheeks. There’s a light unfamiliar sensation in her stomach — like the urge to kick her legs and scream into a pillow, or more precisely, chase after you and hold your hand.
She stiffens.
Oh.
part two
6K notes · View notes
amiableness · 7 months
Text
Little Lies
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Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem! Reader
Summary: James asks Sirius and Y/n to pretend to date after he blurts out they are to Lily.
Word Count: 11.4k
Warnings: smut 18+, male masturbation, oral fem receiving, fingering, unprotected sex (pls be so careful!), reader wears a bikini top, and jealousy
A/N 💌 Hope you all enjoy this; it's been my baby for a while!
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“I may have severely fucked up.” James sighs, his features tight with guilt as he stands before you. His chest is heaving like he has run all the way to you—it’s a likely theory.
Remus glances up from beside you; the two of you had been buried in your homework in the common room when James came racing in. He’s disappointed that James has disrupted the productive atmosphere. There’s no way that you or Remus will be continuing to work on your essays.
His admission doesn’t surprise you; James has come to you countless times seeking assistance after making a mistake. Being best friends since you were born, you’ve grown accustomed to being the one to untangle his messes.
Your parents were best friends, which meant that you and James were also raised to be. There wasn’t a memory that you could recall that James wasn’t in. It ended up working; to both of your mum’s excitement, you and James were inseparable. As the levelheaded one between you, you often found yourself trailing after James, tasked with picking up the pieces.
It was in the aftermath of pranks spiraling out of control, times when he impulsively voiced things he really shouldn’t have, or instances when he procrastinated excessively on his work, inevitably turning to you for help with his essays. Surprisingly, it’s become almost amusing to you, a reliable routine in your friendship.
You undeniably held the title of James Potter’s best friend.
Your eyes narrow skeptically, folding your arms over your chest, “Define severely.”
His demeanor turns sheepish as he nervously rubs the back of his neck, his gaze drifting away from you. He looks incredibly uncomfortable, “I don’t think you’re going to like it.”
“You’re not starting off strong.” You snark, an amused smile finding its way onto your lips. Remus chuckles next to you.
“Y/n.” James sighs, his expression urging you to stop your teasing.
“James.” You mimic.
He shoots you a glare, eyes narrowed in mock irritation, “Lily and I were chatting, like really chatting,” He begins, sighing obnoxiously as he settles into the chair opposite you, his expression a grimace. “She told me why she hasn’t taken me seriously when I flirt with her.”
You pause, confusion etching into your features, “And where exactly did you severely fuck up?”
"She thought we were a couple." He says, his hands gesturing wildly between the two of you, his expression a mix of incredulity and amusement. "Can you believe that? You and me?”
You can believe that, actually. You and James have been mistaken for a couple more times than you can count. Even your parents were convinced the two of you would end up together. While you had told them it wasn’t going to happen, you were convinced they were still holding out hope.
You furrow your brows as you watch him a tad uneasy, “Okay, and where did you severely fuck up in this?”
“I panicked, okay?” James looks guilty when he blurts this out. He nearly shouts it, and Remus hushes him. “She said it wasn’t fair for me to flirt with her because of you. She didn’t want your feelings to be hurt and wouldn’t listen when I said we were just friends. And I panicked.”
“Mate, get to the bloody point.” Remus huffs out, tired of James dragging out the story. Nothing bothered Remus more than when James or Sirius took an eternity to get to the point of their story.
“I told her you’re dating Sirius.” James grimaces, shifting nervously.
“What?” You hiss, your palms smacking onto the table, causing James to flinch, “Have you taken too many hits to the head? James, we are not dating!”
James protests, panicking, "But Lily doesn't know that! If you two could just pretend-"
"No, absolutely not! That is going too far." You snap, sending James a frustrated look, while Remus is chuckling to himself next to you.
"Y/n, please. This could be it! My chance with Lily!" James pleads. He’s desperate to try and salvage the plan he had put all his hopes on.
"Starting your new relationship with a lie, are we?" You snap, massaging at your temples. Most of the stress is from spending too many hours studying, but James is undoubtedly making it worse.
James shrugs, a mischievous smirk starting to form, "Well, not really. You and Sirius already flirt a lot. It’s not that far off from the truth."
James was well aware of your feelings for Sirius; he had watched how you nervously stumbled over your words the first day you met Sirius. He had never seen you like that before, eyes lit up with inflation at first glance.
While he occasionally teased you about it, he understood that what you felt for Sirius was deeper than just a crush. Though you would never admit it out loud.
Your frustration grows, "It absolutely is far off from the truth. Lily probably didn’t even believe you! There's no evidence for her to believe the idea that we are together.” You cry, disbelief evident in your voice. James's casual attitude only adds to your frustration. He doesn’t seem bothered in the slightest.
Remus interjects, an amused scoff escaping him, “There's evidence to believe it."
"Are you joking?" You deadpan, your voice full of incredulity. Remus sends you a teasing smirk. He considers how Sirius flirts with you more than anyone else, but he doesn’t want to deal with Sirius furious at him.
Ever since you met Sirius, you have had a crush on him. Realistically, you knew it was pointless; Sirius had a fan club of admirers. So, you counted yourself lucky that you were one of his closest friends. Being his friend was manageable, and quite honestly, kept your expectations in check.
But Sirius acting like he had feelings for you? You wouldn’t handle that well.
James interjects, "Lily believed it. She even said she wasn't surprised."
"But she thought you and I were together?" You ask, sarcasm dripping from every word.
Your tone was snippier than you intended, but you could feel the stress building. The mere thought of pretending to be with Sirius made you feel nauseous.
"She might've just been jealous, wanting to know if you had feelings for James before she finally goes for him." Remus says casually, and James' eyes light up in excitement.
James is positively giddy as he leans forward, “You think she was jealous?”
"Does Sirius even know?" You interrupt, catching James's eye. He glances at Remus, clearly hoping to hear more about Lily’s supposed jealousy.
James shakes his head, and you scoff, opening your mouth to enlighten James on why you think this is a bad idea. Before you can say anything, Remus cuts you off, “Here’s your chance to tell him.”
You glance up to see Sirius walking through the library, and you resist letting out a lovesick sigh at how effortlessly handsome he is.
Your stomach plummets at the sight of a stunning girl effortlessly chatting with him. His laughter rings out, causing unease to settle in your stomach.
If he was close enough, you probably would’ve tried to eavesdrop.
Despite not knowing her name, you know she’s a Gryffindor; you’ve seen her in the common room. James nudges you, and when you glance at him, he sends you a knowing look.
"Glad to see you guys are having study dates without Peter and me." Sirius calls, settling into the seat next to James and patting him on the shoulder in greeting.
Relief washes over you as you notice that the girl who was with him a second ago is long gone. He glances over at you, and pauses in surprise at your disgruntled expression, "You okay?"
Remus chuckles at the question, finding the harsh look you shoot James hilarious. It’s clear that he’s finding this entire situation entertaining.
“Ask James about what he told Lily.” You say, voice strained with irritation. James sends Sirius a nervous smile, and Sirius looks at him oddly.
"What'd you do?"
Sirius asks, his eyes darting back to you, taking note of your frustrated expression. Your stomach tightens with nerves, scared of Sirius’ reaction. Remus leans back in his chair, excited to see how this will all play out.
"Lily and I were talking today," James sighs, "and she wouldn't stop going on about how she thinks Y/n is in love with me and that it's not fair for me to flirt with her because I could be hurting her."
"She thinks I'm in love with you?" You shriek, oblivious to the barely visible flinch on Sirius' face at James' words. Remus catches it, his grin getting bigger.
James ignores you, “Anyways, I said that it’s not a problem because you and Y/n are dating.” James finishes cautiously, his gaze locked on Sirius, curious for his reaction. Your breath is caught in your throat, your eyes fixed intently on Sirius, awaiting his reaction as well.
"You told Lily that Y/n's my girl?" Sirius inquires casually, causing your stomach to somersault at his words. You force yourself to focus on James instead of the warmth creeping into your skin.
"I panicked, and that's what came out. So, if you guys could pretend you're madly in love, that would be great!" James claps his hands together, and you feel the urge to wack him. You're prepared to snap at him, to explain why asking this of you both isn’t right.
But then Sirius shrugs, "Sure, shouldn't be too hard, right, sweet girl?" He says, and your legs feel like jelly.
You're floundering, not having expected Sirius to agree. He’s never maintained a steady relationship, so pretending that he’s dating you is a big ask. His agreement sends your mind spiraling with different scenarios. For a brief second, you wonder if he agrees so easily because he has feelings for you. But you quickly shut down that thought.
You’re delusional. You truly are.
"Sure, that shouldn't be too bad." You agree, hoping you appear casual about this.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
"I need you two to amp it up. Lily is eating breakfast with us today." James directs, causing you to glance up from your breakfast, disbelief etched into your features. He takes a bite of bacon and casually observes you as though his request is perfectly normal.
"We've switched spots, is that not enough for you?" You ask sarcastically, and Remus shakes his head, wearing an entertained smile as he continues eating breakfast. He can tell you're panicking about pretending to be with Sirius; it’s painfully obvious to everyone at the table.
You're usually seated between James and Peter, but when you attempted to slide into the seat this morning, James slammed his hand down on the seat and instructed you to sit next to your boyfriend, wearing a smug smile. Peter snorted softly but quickly replaced it with a sympathetic smile, silently apologizing for his reaction.
"I mean, we all know Sirius is into PDA, and you look terrified to even be sitting next to him." Peter points out, and you find yourself scrabbling.
Were you two supposed to be super affectionate? Would Sirius find it weird if you initiated it? Questions are flooding your mind leaving you feeling overwhelmed.
"I am not terrified. I just don’t know how to act." You insist.
"Act like you’re in love with him; it shouldn’t be too hard, right?" James quips, earning a glare from you. He responds with a playful wink.
"The boys are right. You need to sit closer to me.” Sirius declares as his arm slips around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You squeak his name in surprise, flustered at how easily he moves you. The boys chuckle at your bewildered expression, finding your embarrassment hilarious.
You feel disappointed when he releases you. Even more so when he doesn't pull you flush against him. Instead, your shoulder to shoulder, the distance between you both feeling more pronounced than ever.
"I'm still waiting on the PDA." Remus says with a playful smirk; his eyes are full of mischief when you glance at him.
You elbow Remus in the side, and he playfully nudges you back, causing you to bump into Sirius' side. Sirius surprises you by wrapping his arm around you, keeping you against him while playfully calling out, "Oi, back off, mate." Being pressed against his side causes warmth to spread through you as you lean further into him.
James watches as Sirius's cheeks flush, a soft smile on his face as he gazes down at you. You appear flustered but content, being so close to him, and James can't help but grin at the two of you.
"We're not going to be all over each other." You say, attempting to distract yourself from the fact that you’re pushed up against Sirius.
"Why not?" James leans forward with a grin, clearly finding everything about this entertaining. “That is what most couples do. Plus, Sirius openly flirts with everyone. But he won’t kiss his own girlfriend? It’s not believable.”
“Merlin, we should have talked about this last night.” You mumble under your breath, and Sirius chuckles beside you. He's entirely at ease. It doesn’t seem like he has any worries about pretending to be your boyfriend. With that observation, you try not to let your worries spiral out of control.
"Listen, we can do whatever you're comfortable with. If you don't want to kiss, then we don't have to," Sirius tells you gently, "but it would be sort of odd for us not to be somewhat affectionate."
The last thing he wants to do is make you feel uncomfortable. But there's a rush of exhilaration at the thought of holding you close and calling you pet names that were once off-limits. And the thought of possibly kissing you?
Surviving that would be inconceivable for him.
"You're right," You nod. “Let's just start off slow. It will be weird if we're all over each other today when we didn’t even sit together yesterday."
"Yeah, yeah! Flirt, be a little touchy, throw some cute pet names in here, will you, Sirius?" James calls out with great enthusiasm. You send him a look that you hope he understands as shut the fuck up. He doesn’t acknowledge your discomfort. Instead, he makes a heart shape with his hands, which adds to your annoyance.
Sirius presses a quick kiss to your temple, “Fuck off, mate. I know how to flirt with my girlfriend, right baby?” You freeze, your eyes widening in disbelief, while the boys laugh at your reaction. How exactly were you supposed to survive this?
You fall into a comfortable silence, happy to enjoy your breakfast as James issues his warnings to the boys, ensuring they behave themselves. Remus, with a subtle eye roll, acknowledges James's words while Peter nods emphatically in agreement. While, Sirius simply outlines every embarrassing memory he plans to share with Lily.
“Y/n, get your man in check.’ James complains in mock irritation, throwing a grape at Sirius, who dodges it.
"Good morning." Lily greets quietly. You all turn to see her approaching, her expression a mix of embarrassment and hesitance, as if she's debating whether to turn around and go to her usual spot down the table.
James abruptly stands up, his hip thumping into the table. He stifles a wince, trying to maintain his composure as he greets Lily, who tries unsuccessfully to suppress a smile at his reaction. Remus cringes and turns back to his breakfast, unable to look at James.
"Y'ready for this?" Sirius leans in, his voice lowered to a hushed tone meant only for you, effectively pulling you away from eavesdropping on James and Lily's conversation. You glance up at him, surprised to find you’re a mere inches away from him.
You're so close that you could individually count each of his eyelashes if you wanted.
You still feel the warmth of his breath mingling with yours, creating an intimate connection between the both of you.
It feels like a magnetic pull draws you closer, tempting you to tilt your head forward and touch his lips with yours. The urge to kiss him is so strong that it nearly knocks the breath from your lungs.
You clear your throat, attempting to push the thought from your mind. "I think so. We're newly dating, so don't go overboard with it." You remind him, a gentle smile playing on your lips.
“When have I ever gone overboard with anything in my life?” The smile he gives you is teasing, and it makes your heart pound to have him this close, his eyes sparkling as he smiles at you.
You hum softly in response, “I can think of quite a few times.”
His voice carries a flirtatious tone, “Can you?”
“Good morning, Lily.” Peter's gentle voice steals your attention away from Sirius. Disappointment and longing settle in his stomach as he watches you pull away and turn to greet Lily, that sweet smile now directed at her.
Lily settles between Peter and James. For a quick second, you feel a pang of jealousy because that's your spot. But when you notice James's pink cheeks and flustered expression, you forget all about it. All you want for James is for him to be happy, and having Lily near seems to do just that.
Breakfast goes smoothly. Lily fits seamlessly into your group, and you can tell it makes James giddy. He doesn't even mind not getting to talk to Lily much. He simply enjoys seeing the girl he's so hopelessly infatuated with getting along so well with his best friends.
You and Sirius aren't acting much differently than you normally do, just sitting close to each other and chatting. However, when Lily turns to you and Sirius, a wave of nervousness washes over you.
“I was so excited to hear you guys were together!”
"Oh yeah? So you can finally go for James with a clear conscience?" Sirius grins, teasing Lily, who looks thoroughly embarrassed. You nudge Sirius in the side, and he responds by giving your hip a gentle squeeze. James sends Sirius an incredulous look, which he pointedly ignores. While Remus and Peter chuckle at the playful banter.
Lily tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and clears her throat; her cheeks tinged with a hint of pink. "Uh, no, just that you two have obviously had feelings for each other for years. Everyone knew."
You're at a loss for words. Is that really what people thought? Clearly, they read you right, but you weren’t sure what to think about Sirius having feelings for you. Maybe he did, or maybe they were mistaking it for how he constantly flirted with you. But that was just how Sirius was; it didn’t necessarily mean he had romantic feelings for you.
"Haven't gotten her out of my head since the day I met her." Sirius says casually, his right elbow resting on the table as he pops a piece of bacon into his mouth. His other arm remains securely wrapped around your waist, holding you close to his side with a gentle yet firm embrace.
You look at him in shock, your eyes widening at his unexpected confession. Even the boys look slightly startled at Sirius' words, their eyes darting between you and him.
“That’s so sweet.” Lily says softly, her eyes glowing with genuine happiness as she sends you a warm smile. The sight tugs at your heartstrings but also stirs up guilt in the pit of your stomach. Lying always made you feel uneasy like a weight was pressing down on your chest.
"Sirius, I can't believe you thought that she—" Lily begins, her voice trailing off as James interjects, his interruption tinged with a hint of urgency.
"Okay, love! I think I should walk you to class, don't y' think?" James stands up from the table, extending his hand towards Lily.
Lily looks slightly confused, but she takes his hand nonetheless. As they walk away, James glances back and sends a wink in Sirius' direction. Your attention immediately shifts to Sirius, curiosity written all over your face as you’re about to ask about Lily's interrupted comment.
Sirius cuts you off before you can ask, shaking his head with a gentle smile and flushed cheeks, "Don't even bother asking; I’m not telling you what she was talking about.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
You’re curled up next to Peter on the common room couch, both of you chatting quietly together. For the last twenty minutes, he has been feeding you details about the Ravenclaw girl he has a crush on. He's sworn you to secrecy. Hoping for your advice on asking her out without enduring the teasing of the rest of the Marauders. Your gasp of excitement nearly gives away the secret, but you quickly compose yourself, offering a reassuring smile to Peter.
"Who is she?" You ask, excitement laced in your voice, but Peter sends you an apprehensive look.
"I'm going to keep that to myself. Your squeal almost let the boys know.." He teases, though his tone also carries a note of seriousness.
A laugh escapes you, "I promise when you’re ready to tell me I’ll be so careful about keeping it a secret."
"Oi! Are you two sharing secrets over there?" James calls out, his voice immensely curious. He’s sat with his back to the flickering flames, his palms flat against the floor as he leans back on them. Peter tenses beside you, but you maintain an easy smile. Remus and Sirius are lounging in the armchairs nearby, their attention piqued by the exchange.
"All my deepest darkest secrets." You tease, flashing James a grin. He furrows his brow and sits up, clearly riled up by your response.
“Y/n, as your best friend, I better know all these secrets.” James lips are pouted, his expression tinged with a hint of concern, as if he's genuinely worried that you and Peter are sharing secrets that he doesn’t know.
James has always been fiercely protective of your friendship. Despite being close to the boys, your bond with James was stronger. There was nothing that the two of you didn't confide in each other; he honestly did know all your secrets.
“You do.” You smile reassuringly, and James's expression breaks into a satisfied grin.
The boys continue their soft conversation by the crackling fire, the warm glow casting flickering shadows across the room, while you and Peter sit in comfortable silence. Both of you are lost in thought as you relax in the cozy atmosphere.
After stifling a good five yawns, you glance at the time and decide it's probably best to head to your room, the quiet of the common room signaling just how late it had gotten.
You inch closer to Peter, before finding the courage to lean over and envelop him in a friendly hug, your arms wrapping around his shoulders.
He's momentarily taken aback, his body tenses at your touch, but soon he relaxes, reciprocating by wrapping you in his arms. It's a gesture that feels somewhat out of character for you, but after he trusted you with his secret, it seems like the most natural thing to do, a silent affirmation of support for him.
"I think I'm going to go to bed." You tell him softly, "But I promise we'll talk more tomorrow."
“I’d like that.” He smiles at you as you pull away. You grab your bag and make your way in the direction of the stairs.
“Goodnight boys!” You call out softly over your shoulder before disappearing up the stairs. Sirius watches you go, his gaze lingering on your figure, his thoughts full of you long after you've left the room.
Ever since you moved to hug Peter, his eyes have been on you, curiosity and jealousy settling in his stomach.
"Why the hell did you get a hug?" Sirius asks, his tone laced with bitterness as his gaze shifts to Peter, who appears taken aback by Sirius’ sudden question. Remus and James exchange amused glances, before they refocus their attention on Peter, waiting expectantly for an explanation to ease the tension.
“I don’t know, she just hugged me.” Peter squirms uncomfortably in his seat, his confidence quickly dwindling as he's put on the spot.
Sirius nods slowly, his lips pursing in contemplation. His carefully measured tone betrays the longing and a hint of possessiveness that he struggles to conceal, "What were you guys talking about over there?"
Remus interjects with a teasing tone, "Careful, Pads. You sound jealous." A playful glint dances in his eyes as he notices Sirius' furrowed brows and the discontent on his face.
“He’s got the boyfriend role down.” James quips, and Sirius sends them both a glare.
“I’m not jealous,” Sirius repeats quite grumpily. “I just don’t understand why Peter got a hug, and we didn’t.”
James barks out a laugh while Remus shakes his head, a chuckle escaping him in sheer disbelief.
"You're jealous because you have feelings for her." James states matter-of-factly.
Sirius begins to shake his head in denial, but Remus promptly interjects, his voice firm and unwavering, "’Haven't gotten her out of my head since the day I met her.’ What the fuck was that then?” Remus repeats Sirius’ words from the other day, perfectly mimicking his tone.
James bursts into laughter, the sound hearty and infectious, while Peter offers a small smile, observing Sirius as he struggles to respond.
“Not to mention, you’ve been staring Peter down ever since Y/n touched him.” Remus remarks while Sirius gazes blankly at him, his expression unreadable as he nervously chews on his bottom lip.
“You really have.” Peter adds with a grimace.
“You like her, mate.” Remus concludes, his words carrying a sense of finality that lingers in the air.
Sirius sighs heavily.
The conversation weighs heavily on him as he sinks down in the armchair, his brow furrowed in deep thought. The boys’ words replay in his mind. He was jealous, and he did like you. He already knew all of this. But he had always been cautious around you, mindful of the unspoken boundaries because of your friendship with James. A nagging worry in the back of his mind that James would be against any relationship between the two of you. James was his greatest friend, and he worried he could lose him if he attempted to go for you. The idea of James being unfazed by a romantic relationship between you and Sirius threw him off balance. It vastly differed from the scenarios he had envisioned, where James would react with fierce anger upon learning of Sirius' affection for you. The realization left Sirius feeling torn. Did that mean he could actually go for you?
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
As the air is warm and balmy, birdsong emanating from the trees while the leaves rustle in the gentle breeze. The sun casts everything in a golden haze, letting you know summer is near. The boys are certain of their decision: today is the perfect day to spend at the lake.
Laughter and chatter echo across the shimmering waters as the boys swim around the lake, reaching where you’re draped over a soft towel next to Lily. You have been trading gossip back and forth for the last couple of hours. It’s refreshing since usually you’re glued to the boys’ sides. You were constantly in the company of at least one of the four.
You feel a twinge of regret in your chest, realizing you haven't made an effort to have a close friendship with the girls. And you really should have. It wasn't a deliberate choice; James had always been your go-to person. Then, when you met the boys, you naturally formed close bonds with them, too. The thought of branching out and making more friends never really crossed your mind.
Though you value your friendships with the boys, you decide you desperately need to spend more time with the girls. The possibility of James and Lily getting together has you hopeful.
“You realize Sirius can’t take his eyes off you, right?” You choose to remain silent, only giving a shrug, fully aware that Sirius is merely pretending to be in love with you. To his credit, he's played the part convincingly throughout the entire week. There have been moments when you've found yourself questioning the authenticity of his actions, wondering whether his affection is genuine or merely his acting skills.
For someone who hasn’t had much practice with relationships, he possessed an innate ability to treat you like you were the only girl in his world. Whether it was a reassuring hand on your lower back as you maneuvered through the crowded halls, a tender kiss planted on your forehead when you parted ways, or the subtle exchange of flirty smiles whenever your eyes met across the room.
Sirius' laughter drifts over from the lake, reaching your ears, and a subconscious smile graces your lips. Lily must have seen your reaction, “Merlin, you really like him, don’t you?”
It was driving you to the brink of obsession. If this was the experience of being Sirius' girl, you wanted it more than before.
Despite your efforts to contain it, a sigh slips from your lips, "Yeah, I really do."
Confessing this feels uncomfortable. You've never talked to anyone about the depth of your feelings for Sirius, and now you're doing so under the guise of a fake relationship. You had come close to telling James, but you really didn’t need to. He had an uncanny ability to read you like an open book. Guilt churns in your stomach once more as you think about lying to Lily. What will her reaction be when you reveal that you and Sirius were never actually together?
The silence lingers for a few moments before you gently break it, "What were you about to say at breakfast the other day? Before James interrupted?"
Lily's expression shifts from confusion to excitement, her eyes lighting up, “Oh, in Charms! I finally wrangled it out of Sirius that he had feelings for you. But he insisted that nothing was ever going to happen because you didn’t like him back.”
It feels like you've been plunged into a tub of cold water. Your mind goes momentarily blank, a surge of disbelief flooding your senses as you struggle to comprehend Lily's words. Your body freezes in place, grappling with what this could possibly mean. There’s no possible way you heard her correctly.
“What? When was this?” Your voice escapes breathless and startled, yet Lily appears oblivious to it.
“Just a couple of weeks ago! I’m so glad he finally told you how he felt.” Lily smiles sweetly before laying back on her towel. If she notices you’re in a state of shock, she doesn’t say anything.
You hear a whistle, and no surprise, your best friend throws himself between you and Lily, “Don’t you two look pretty!”
Lily gasps as James leans down, playfully pressing his lips against her cheek, his hair dripping water onto her. Though she protests, you both can tell she doesn't truly mind it.
As James and Lily become wrapped up in their own world, you find yourself drifting back to the conversation from a moment ago. Your mind spins, still muddled by Lily's words. Sirius had feelings for you. Why hadn't he spoken up? Did he not want anything to come of it?
Your heart nearly stops when Sirius drops down and hovers over you, his hands propping him up on either side of your head. You barely register that he's shirtless and above you just before icy water cascades from his hair onto your skin. A startled cry escapes you as the cold droplets trickle down your cheeks, tracing a chilling path along your neck and chest.
“Sirius Black!” You had intended to sound angry, but laughter slips past your lips, betraying your emotions. Sirius grins at your reaction, his eyes trailing down from your eyes to shamelessly check out the bikini top you have on.
The boys had been teasing him relentlessly after witnessing how he practically fell to his knees when you walked into the common room wearing a bikini top and tiny denim shorts. You were oblivious to his gaze, heading straight for Lily and conversing about who knows what.
He couldn't tear his eyes away from you all day.
He feigns ignorance as you whine at him, responding with a sweet smile instead, “What, sweet girl?”
"Get off!" You squeal, though your tone lacks any real irritation. Deep down, you’re secretly enjoying having him so close, enveloping you in his presence.
“Whatever you want, sweet girl.” He mutters as he rolls off of you, repositioning himself so he's sitting behind you. With a gentle tap on your shoulder, he prompts you to sit up, then guides you until your back hits his chest. Once you're settled, he loosely wraps his arms around your shoulders before placing a kiss on your head.
Remus catches your eye as he and Peter make their way to their towels. Unlike Sirius and James, they hadn't hurried over to you and Lily. Instead, they took their time, chatting lazily while the sun warmed their skin. Remus sends you a sly, suggestive glance, and you respond by narrowing your eyes at him playfully.
Sirius and Remus engage in their own conversation, their voices blending into the background as Peter gestures for you to follow him. Sirius protests lightly, his eyes following you as you pull away from him to walk down to the lake with Peter.
You're gone for no more than twenty minutes, offering Peter advice on establishing a friendship with the girl he likes, perhaps making it easier for him to ask her out in the future.
Despite Remus' attempts to draw him back into the conversation, Sirius remains preoccupied, his gaze fixed on you until you eventually return and settle onto the towel beside him, seeking the familiar comfort of his presence. Only then does Sirius relax, draping his arm around you protectively.
He despises the twinge of jealousy that creeps in every time Peter has you to himself.
“Mate, you’re fucked.” Remus chuckles, and you assume it's due to something amusing said during their conversation. Sirius simply rolls his eyes and playfully extends his middle finger in Remus' direction, a gesture of mock annoyance that elicits a smirk from both of them.
The rest of the afternoon is spent wrapped up in Sirius as you chat with your friends and bask in the sun.
You spend the remainder of the afternoon draped over Sirius, basking in the warmth of the sun as you chat with your friends. It's been a while since you've felt so at ease.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
After lounging by the lake all afternoon, the thought of cleaning up for a party you had little interest in attending felt like an unnecessary chore. However, after an hour of James' persistent pleading, you eventually gave in and agreed to go. You were confused about why he insisted on your presence, especially when he'd be busy spending the evening with Lily. You couldn't help but think you could have been snug in bed with a good book instead.
“How long do you think it will take before they get together?” You turn to Remus, who is leaning against the wall next to you. He wasn't thrilled about coming tonight, either. The full moon was approaching, and he could already feel the effects beginning to take hold.
You scan the bustling room, eager to catch a glimpse of James and determine Lily's proximity. Impatience simmers within you as you wait for them to get together. Their relationship seems overdue, and you’re desperate for it to happen, bringing an end to the relationship you and Sirius are forced to maintain. Though being Sirius' girlfriend has its perks, the artificiality of the situation weighs on your conscience.
After a lazy afternoon enveloped in Sirius' arms, you had returned to your room feeling unsettled. The comfort of being held by Sirius felt genuine, yet it was all fake, and that realization deeply unsettles you. The longer this relationship goes on, the more you worry about your heart being left in pieces at the end.
“Probably any day now. Why? You aren’t having fun being Sirius’ girl?” Remus asks, casting a knowing smirk in your direction. You huff and give him a playful nudge, causing his drink to slosh around in his cup. He chuckles in response, amused by your reaction.
"It's not that, and you know it." You respond, frustration evident in your tone.
Remus turns towards you, a genuine smile on his face this time, "You guys are doing quite the job of looking infatuated with each other."
You shoot him a warning look, sensing where the conversation is headed.
But Remus persists, his gaze steady, "You should consider telling him how you feel."
You scoff. "Absolutely not."
"Why not? What have you got to lose?"
You meet his gaze, incredulous, "Our friendship, for starters."
Remus shakes his head, "Do you really think Sirius would end your friendship? I doubt you could get rid of him if you tried."
You meet Remus's gaze, your brow furrowed with uncertainty, "Okay, maybe he wouldn't end our friendship. But things would definitely get awkward, and who knows where it could lead."
Remus offers a small smile, "Or it could go well. You could end up together."
You remain silent, the weight of Remus's words sinking in as you contemplate the idea of confessing your feelings to Sirius. Your stomach churns with anxiety at the mere thought of opening up to him. The fear of rejection and the potential fallout from confessing weighs heavy on your chest.
But Lily had shared with you that Sirius had opened up about his feelings for you. Maybe there was a possibility that confessing your own feelings might not be as far-fetched as you had assumed. Maybe being with Sirius wasn't entirely out of reach.
Remus observes the slight furrow in your brow as you chew on your bottom lip, a clear indication of your spiraling thoughts. The dim light of the common room highlights the unease on your face. "Do you want a drink?" He offers, his voice gentle and reassuring.
You pause, considering his offer, grateful for the distraction, "Yes, please." You respond with a small smile, the tension in your shoulders easing slightly.
As Remus leaves to fetch you a drink, you're left alone with your thoughts, the chatter and laughter of the crowded common room serving as a backdrop to your contemplation. Your eyes wander over the sea of bodies, each occupied with their own conversations and activities, creating a lively yet chaotic atmosphere.
“Y/n, hi!” You startle as Max Townsend stands beside you, his sudden presence catching you off guard. You recall being partners in Charms a couple of weeks ago, but beyond that, your interactions had been limited.
"Hey, Max." You greet with a soft smile, noticing how his shoulders relax slightly at your acknowledgment. He settles against the wall, his posture casual yet attentive, as if genuinely interested in chatting with you.
"I know we haven’t talked much since Charms, but I’ve been meaning to catch up with you." Max says, his voice earnest as he breaks the silence between you.
You're surprised by his remark, "You have?" You ask, genuine curiosity coloring your tone.
"Yeah! I enjoyed spending time with you." Max admits, his voice slightly shaky as he offers you a shy smile. You notice the faint blush coloring his cheeks, a sign of nervousness.
"I enjoyed spending time with you too! I don’t think I could have passed the last exam without your help." You respond sincerely, returning his smile with warmth. His face lights up at your words, visibly relieved.
He regains some confidence and continues, "Actually, Y/n, I was wondering if you wanted to go to Hogsmeade sometime?"
Your smile falters, and you feel a pang of guilt. You have the excuse of having a boyfriend, at least. It makes things a little easier for you. For a second, you debate if you should say yes, go on a date, and move past your feelings for Sirius. But then you think about Lily‘s words and how he might possibly like you back. Not only that but you’re supposed to be in a relationship right now.
You can't bring yourself to say yes; truth be told, you don't really want to, anyway.
"That’s really sweet of you to ask. But I’m dating Sirius." You reply though the words feel heavy on your tongue, wishing they were true.
Max looks taken aback, "Sirius Black?"
"Yes." You confirm, feeling a wave of discomfort wash over you; turning someone down is always an awkward and uncomfortable experience.
Max shakes his head, looking confused, "I didn’t know Sirius-"
"You didn’t know what, Townsend?" Sirius looks hard at him, slipping his arm around your waist and handing you a drink. "Here, baby, Rem said you wanted a drink."
You thank him quietly, settling into his side with ease. Glancing up at him, you notice Sirius isn't looking at you; his gaze is fixed on Max. His jaw clenches tightly, and his usual friendly smile is absent. The message to Max is clear: back off, she's mine.
Max looks uneasy, eyes darting from you to Sirius, “Uh, I didn’t know you and Y/n were together.”
“And why were you talking about that?”
“Uh,” Max looks at you briefly, his expression tinged with panic. He lets out a sigh, reminiscent of a child caught in the act and resigned to confessing. “I asked her out.”
Sirius' entire body tenses, his tone laced with mock curiosity, “Did you?”
He feels sick at the thought of you going on a date with another guy. Images flash through his mind – Max holding your hand on a walk through Hogsmeade, flirting with you over dinner, and the possibility of him kissing you goodnight before you head back through the portrait at the end of the night.
A surge of intense emotion floods him, an overwhelming desire to lash out, to throw a punch and convey the unmistakable message that you are off-limits.
But then the reality hits him: you're not off limits. You're perfectly single, and maybe you actually wanted to go out with Max. The realization sinks in, gnawing at him from the inside, intensifying the ache in his chest.
“But look, man, I didn’t know she was your girl! Honest.”
"Max, it's okay. Really." You interject gently, offering him a reassuring smile. Max nods frantically, clearly relieved, before hurrying off in the opposite direction and disappearing into the crowd of Gryffindors.
“What the hell was that?” You turn to Sirius, but he refuses to meet your gaze. Instead, he drops his arm from your waist and leans back against the wall, taking a long sip from his drink, his expression unreadable
“Playing the part of your boyfriend. You should go find James, he was looking for you.” His mutterings reach your ears, and your stomach clenches with irritation as hurt flashes over your features. He's never shut down before you, and it hurts your feelings deeply.
You don’t bother saying anything; instead, you scoff and walk away. Sirius’s eyes follow you the second you leave, watching as you walk away with a heavy feeling settling in his stomach.
Maybe he did need to express his feelings to you. There might be a chance that you felt the same way. And if you didn't, at least he would know and could attempt to move on from you.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“I think you need to check on Sirius.” James murmurs into your ear as you stand in the common room, waiting for Lily to join you. You're flanked by the boys, but Sirius is conspicuously absent.
You glance over at him, confused, “Why? Is he not coming down?”
“He bailed, said he isn’t feeling good.”
“He isn’t coming to Hogsmeade with us?” You all had meticulously planned your trip to Hogsmeade during the lake outing yesterday, discussing the shops you wanted to visit and the Butterbeer you couldn't wait to taste.
“Oh,” You mutter, “I’ll check on him and catch up with you guys then.”
You still harbor concern for his well-being, a lingering sense of care that remains despite the the frustration you feel about last night. You ascend the stairs, faintly catching Peter's inquiry about your destination and James' response that you won't be joining them anymore. You contemplate turning around, half-tempted to inquire with James about his statement, but decided against it, choosing not to waste your energy.
You're so deeply immersed in your thoughts as you walk through the hall that you don't even notice the sound at first.
The muffled noise filtering through the boys' dorm door catches your attention, causing you to pause in front of the door. You briefly entertain the idea that Sirius might be genuinely unwell, but skepticism lingers in your mind. The persistent groans don't quite fit the pattern of someone who's just sick.
You were on the verge of turning around, genuinely considering it, until you caught a muffled moan that distinctly sounded like your name.
You pause, questioning the authenticity of what you just heard, wondering if it was a figment of your imagination or if you truly heard your name. But then you hear it, “Fuck, Y/n. Feels so good.”
Your legs turn to jelly, the words coursing through your veins like an electric shock, leaving you feeling stunned and breathless.
Without a second thought or even a plan forming in your mind, you find yourself knocking on the door. Inside, you hear a muffled curse followed by shuffling before Sirius swings the door open nearly a minute later, clad only in pajama pants. His hair is tousled, his cheeks flushed, and he's breathing heavily. The surprise on his face is evident as he takes in your unexpected presence.
“What were you just doing?” Your words spill out more confrontationally than you intended, catching Sirius off guard. The surprise flickers across his face, evident in how his eyebrows knit together and his eyes widen slightly.
“Uh, I-” He glances back into his room, searching for a believable excuse among his belongings. Flustered, he struggles to come up with a convincing lie.
"Sirius," You press, and his eyes flicker back to you. He appears guilty, aware that you've caught on. "I just heard you." You add, your tone that is firm but not accusatory.
“Merlin, Y/n. I’m sorry I-” He stammers, his heart sinking into the pit of his stomach at the mere thought of you possibly feeling disgusted with him or worse, refusing to remain his friend because of what he’s just done.
“What were you thinking about?” You ask instead, taking a deliberate step closer to him. The room feels charged with tension, and you can sense Sirius's unease. His breath hitches as your presence draws nearer, his eyes flickering with a mix of apprehension and anticipation.
He glances over your shoulder, his gaze flicking to the empty hallway outside before he answers, “You.”
“Me?” You take a tentative step closer, your voice barely a whisper compared to before, its tone huskier, laden with curiosity and perhaps a hint of intrigue. You fix him with a daring look, a glint of challenge in your eye, as if silently daring him to take action.
He remains silent, his gaze fixed on you for a fleeting moment before he takes action, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the dorm without a word.
As soon as the door shuts, he presses you against the door, his movements swift and urgent. You let out a gasp in surprise, feeling the sudden shift in atmosphere as Sirius's intensity envelops you. His eyes, usually filled with mischief, now bore into yours with a mixture of seriousness and vulnerability.
“Y/n. Why did you knock on the door?”
You don’t answer at first, your eyes locked with his for a few heartbeats before you let out a sigh, “Because I heard you say my name, and now I know you want me the same way that I’ve always wanted you.”
Sirius doesn’t hesitate, his lips meeting yours with a sense of urgency that sends a shiver down your spine. The moment his touch connects with yours, you exhale softly, feeling the warmth of his lips against yours. With gentle pressure, you draw him closer, your arms wrapping around his shoulders while Sirius’ embrace envelops you, pulling you closer as if he never wants to let go.
He initiates with a tender kiss on your lips, then gently nibbles on your bottom lip, eliciting a gasp. Seizing the opportunity of your parted lips, he intensifies the kiss, pressing forcefully into your mouth. Sirius kisses you as if each moment is the first and last time, molding you into pliancy. You willingly surrender, allowing him to kiss you into a state of blissful oblivion.
As he withdraws, a soft whimper escapes your lips in protest. He casts a questioning glance your way as he lifts the hem of your shirt, and you respond with a nod of affirmation. Slowly, he peels it off of you and lets it drop at your feet. Shamelessly, he admires your breasts and how they sit so pretty in your black bra. For a moment, the thought of apologizing for the simple garment crosses your mind, but the way his gaze lingers on you halts any inclination to do so.
He leans down, pressing kisses and nipping at the exposed skin on your neck and trailing his way down to your chest. It steals your breath away, prompting you to weave your fingers through his hair as you tilt your head back, reveling in the sensation. He's murmuring praises against your skin, ranting about how beautiful you are, how sweet your moans are, and how you drive him crazy. Your heart pounds within your chest, and for an instant, you fear its thunderous rhythm might betray you, considering how near he stands.
“Take it off.” In a hushed tone, you speak, prompting Sirius's gaze to swiftly rise and lock with yours.
He encircles you with his arms, quickly undoing your bra, and you deftly push the straps down, allowing the garment to cascade down, unveiling your skin. Swiftly, you toss it into the growing pile that appears to be taking shape by the door.
Sirius gazes intently, his bottom lip captured between his teeth, and a subtle furrow forms between his eyebrows, “Fucking hell, y’have the prettiest tits I’ve ever seen.”
Before you can utter a word, his mouth is on your breasts. Pressing the softest kisses onto your nipple before gently biting it, causing your breath to hitch. He bends down, mirroring the gesture with the other one.
His hands, possessively grip at your hips, act as anchors, momentarily keeping you in place. However, a growing restlessness takes hold, and you start to squirm, a subtle plea for more of his attention. Silently comprehending your unspoken desire, he wordlessly responds. A gentle tug on your hand is all the communication needed, and without a moment's hesitation, you obediently follow his lead.
Guiding you, he directs you to settle onto his bed, a silent request you readily heed. Your legs dangle over the edge of the bed as you rely on your elbows to bear all your weight.
Sirius kneels in front of you, easily slipping off both of your shoes and tossing them to the side. He reaches up, hooking his fingers into the waistband of your skirt before tugging it down and off of your legs. You’re left in a pair of gray panties that easily show how soaked you are for him.
He pushes on your knees until your legs are completely spread for him, and he can get a clear view of your soaked underwear. A hushed curse escapes his lips, the words slipping out quietly as his gaze lingers on you.
“You’re fucking stunning. I don’t know what I did to deserve this. To deserve you.” You bask in his words, your body thrumming with warmth and delight as his sweet sentiments wash over you.
He glances up at you, and he nearly loses it right then and there. You’re watching him through hooded eyes, your pupils dilated wide, a silent reflection of your anticipation and desire. He doubts he could ever erase the image of the way you're gazing at him, etching it into his memory with the fervent wish to witness it for the rest of his days.
He caresses his hands along your thighs, fingers gently squeezing and kneading with each pass. Occasionally, he leans down, planting tender kisses on your sensitive skin, each one a whispered promise of affection. The closer he gets to your core, the more you squirm and let out soft whimpers.
“Can I take your panties off?” He asks, glancing up at you from between your thighs. The pad of his thumb brushes against your clit, and you jolt in surprise.
A gasp escapes your lips as you're overtaken by the sensation, yet swiftly, you find yourself nodding frantically in response, “Please.”
Overrun with desperation, Sirius pulls at them with such fervor that they nearly tear as he tugs them off. You can't help but giggle at his fervor, amused by his frantic actions and the unmistakable look of pure desire written across his face. He wouldn't be surprised if he was drooling, staring the sight of your glistening pussy.
“I want to be inside of you.” He declares, standing up from the floor, leaning over you to firmly grasp your jaw before capturing your lips in a heady, intoxicating kiss. The moan that escapes you sounds so foreign, so unlike yourself, that it catches you by surprise, leaving you momentarily taken aback. You don't bother vying for dominance, allowing him to take control of the kiss. He withdraws from you leaving your chest heaving and breaths coming in ragged gasps.
“Take your pants off.” You demand, reaching desperately for the band of his pajamas to shove them off. Sirius beats you to the task, swiftly shoving them off himself in a display of impatience.
“Sirius.” Drool pools in your mouth at the sight of him. Long, thick, and pretty. Your lips part slightly, and you look up at Sirius in surprise, caught off guard by him. For a fleeting moment, you sit there, eyes locked, contemplating whether you'll be able to take him or not. He’s bigger than anyone you have ever been with before.
Sirius doesn’t let you stare for too long before his fingers are sliding through your soaked folds and brushing over your clit. Whimpers and moans tumble past your lips as Sirius rubs firm circles over you to get you adjusted before dipping down and pressing two fingers into you. A cry escapes you at the intrusion, and your hand instinctively reaches down to grip his bicep firmly.
Sirius startles you by leaning down and pressing the softest kiss to your clit, before licking you the bundle of nerves softly. Your body tenses with pleasure, hands gripping the sheets beneath you.
“I’ve always wanted to taste you.” He confesses a surge of heat courses through your body, igniting every nerve ending as you absorb his words. He doesn’t waste another second before leaning down and gently sucking on your clit.
"Please don't stop." You plead softly, and Sirius complies, continuing with unwavering determination. He nips and sucks, licking through your folds and holding your thighs open for him. His fingers continue to slide in and out of you; the sounds you’re making are obscene.
You’re struck by the thojught that this doesn't compare to any other times that you’ve been eaten out. But maybe it's not just his technique that feels good; it might be the fact that its Sirius who’s between your legs.
Your thighs tremble, and a euphoric sensation begins to build up in your stomach, making it feel like you are floating on a delightful high.
“Sirius, I need you.” You gasp sharply, your fingers instinctively tugging on his hair, signaling for him to ease up. You wanted to come together for your first time, as cheesy as it may have been.
As he rises to his feet, your eyes meet, and contagious, goofy smiles spread across both of your faces. In this shared moment, a mutual understanding passes between you—acknowledging the absurdity of the situation yet reveling in the fact that there's nowhere else you'd rather be.
You watch as he wraps his hand around himself, dragging his hand up and down a few times. He whispers for you to scoot back until your head rests against the pillow, and with a gentle nod, you comply. He follows suit, settling on his haunches before you, creating a comforting, intimate space between you both.
“Y’ready?” He asks in a hushed tone, leaning in to hover over you, and at that moment, a rush of memories floods your mind, reminiscent of yesterday by the lake. You're convinced you must look rather pathetic with the speed of your nod, but Sirius only responds with a sweet smile.
With a grip on his cock, he slides the tip through your slick, both of you sucking in a breath at the sensation. He gently pushes at your entrance. Sirius steals a glance up at you, silently seeking reassurance, and you respond with a simple nod and a warm smile, letting him know that everything is perfect. Sirius catches you off guard as he leans down, tenderly pressing the gentlest of kisses to your lips, a gesture filled with unexpected sweetness.
His gaze shifts, watching as he pushes his cock inside of you, letting out a string of curses as your pussy grips him tight, pulling him deeper inside.
“Fuck,” Gritting his teeth, he squeezes his eyes shut, breathing deeply through his nose, determined to regain control and prevent himself from losing composure. He’s sitting fully inside you, and he has to take a breather because you feel better than he could have ever imagined. The last thing he wants is for this to end as soon as it begins.
His voice sounds utterly shattered, “You’re so wet, fuck.”
You entwine your fingers in his hair, feeling the soft strands between your fingertips as you pull him closer, urging him to meet your lips with his own. The anticipation builds as his warm breath mingles with yours, creating an intimate connection before the gentle press of his lips against yours. Parting your lips, you deepen the kiss, and Sirius eagerly reciprocated.
“Sirius. Fuck me, please.” You exhale softly against his lips, and Sirius responds with a low, guttural groan of longing and desire.
He doesn’t waste any time before dragging his cock along the sensitive walls of your pussy, before thrusting back into you, “God, your pussy feels incredible.” The cry that escapes you resonates loudly in the room, and you're immensely grateful that everyone is out at Hogsmeade. The absence of others allows you the freedom to be as uninhibited as you are, knowing that the full dorms would never afford you the same level of privacy and volume.
“Feels so good.” You gasp, head rolling to the side, your cheek resting against the pillows. Sirius’ hands rest against the back of your thighs, holding your legs against your chest, giving a clear view of the way his cock is so seamlessly slipping inside of you.
He watches you, transfixed on the way your brows pinch together in pleasure, lips parting to let moans slip past. It's as if a dam has burst within Sirius, an unstoppable torrent of words and emotions pouring forth as he finds himself unable to contain everything he's been holding back.
“Fuck, you sound s’pretty, sweet girl,” The groan that leaves his lips is downright sinful. “Thought about this pretty pussy all day. Pretended to be sick just to get off to the thought of you.”
“Sirius.” You whine, reaching out to thread your fingers through his hair and pull him down to you. You’re soaked and aching, desperate for Sirius to fuck you faster. However, much to your disappointment, he remains insistent on maintaining a slow, teasing pace.
“Pictured, tugging that fucking bikini top down. Watching your tits bounce while I fuck you. Fuck, cumming all over them.” The whine that escapes you feels pathetic, and under different circumstances, you would've been embarrassed by it. However, given the situation you're in, embarrassment takes a backseat.
“I know, baby. I know.” He complies, adjusting his position so that his right arm supports him above you while his left hand gently traces your skin. Brushing over your nipples, trailing up and over your tits, before placing his hand loosely around the base of your throat.
“You’re fucking perfect,” He grunts, admiring how ruined you look for him. Your mascara smudged beneath your eyes from tears, and your lips swollen from his earlier kisses. He loved seeing you like this. Being the one to ruin you, to smudge your makeup and bring you to tears. “Taking my cock s’well.”
You’re incoherent, begging for Sirius to go harder, to fuck you faster. Hands pawing at his ass, desperately trying to bring him closer.
His hand squeezes your throat gently, “Tell me you want me to fuck you harder. C’mon love, wanna hear you beg for it.”
A smug grin tugs on Sirius’ lips as he watches you struggling to form words. You’re getting close if the way you’re squeezing him so tight and rolling your hips is any indicator.
But then a desperate, needy whine with the words he so badly wants to hear slips past your lips. Babbling about needing his cock and wanting him to ruin you. The second he hears your pleas, he thrusts into you harder, setting a brutal new pace that has you crying for him.
“I’ll give you anything you ask for, m’love.” He speaks so sincerely that you feel a surge of emotions welling up inside, an overwhelming urge threatening to bring tears to your eyes.
Overcome with your emotions, you reach for Sirius’ hand and interlace them together before Sirius presses your clasped hands into the sheets. His headboard thumps against the wall rhythmically.
“Need you to fill me up. Please.” You plead desperately, and Sirius curses, his voice rough and strained.
“Shit, that’s my girl. Want me to fill you with my cum?” It's the praise that pushes you over the edge. Your back arches, pressing your breasts into Sirius’ chest and your legs tremble.
“Doing so good f’me.” He’s close behind you. Your tight, wet walls clenching around him is what does it for him.
“Fuck, baby. Gonna cum. Fuck.” Sirius moans, burying his head in the crook of your neck as his hips stutter and you cry out at the feeling of his warm cum filling you up. You clench his hand tightly, your nails likely leaving imprints on his skin. A sob escapes your lips, and your fingers weave through his hair, a desperate attempt to draw him closer.
You both remain entwined, lost in each other's embrace as you gradually come down from the euphoric highs. The room resonates with the sound of your intertwined breaths, each one heavy and labored. Your body feels utterly slack, every muscle loosened, and you're so relaxed that you could easily doze off at any moment.
Sirius presses a couple of tender kisses against your neck, eliciting a satisfied hum from you. When he withdraws from you, a wince escapes you as you feel the separation, and Sirius’ eyes dart up to you in concern.
“Y’okay, sweet girl?”
“I’m okay, just sore.” You grace him with a sweet smile, and Sirius leans in, gently pressing a tender kiss to your forehead.
“Gonna get a towel, one second.” He assures you, rising from the bed and disappearing into the bathroom. You listen to the faucet running and the faint sounds of the cupboard opening and closing. Lying back, you gaze up at the ceiling, absently nibbling on your thumbnail until a smile breaks across your face at the thought of what just happened.
“Here, love.” Sirius says, sitting on the edge of the bed holding a washcloth in his hand. He’s got a fresh pair of pajama pants on, you didn’t even notice him grab clothes from his trunk, too lost in your thoughts.
Sirius gently grips your ankle, encouraging you to spread your legs. His breath hitches at the sight of his cum dripping out of you and onto his sheets, desperately hoping to see this sight again. He murmurs a curse under his breath, his touch gentle as he delicately uses the warm washcloth to clean between your thighs.
“There.” He whispers softly before aiding you to sit up. As you glance over, you notice the t-shirt and pajama pants laid out beside him, meant for you. Your heart swells with warmth as he assists you in slipping it over your head. With a grateful smile, you slide into the pajama pants. Meanwhile, Sirius utters evanesco to fix the sheets up, before joining you in bed.
“C’mere.” He beckons to you, sinking into the pillows, and you nestle against him, finding solace as you rest your head on his chest.
In the silence, you both relish the comfort of each other's embrace, enveloped in a cocoon of intimacy. Lost in contemplation, your mind wanders, grappling with what just happened and what that meant for the both of you.
"That wasn't just a one-time thing, was it?" You inquire, the hopefulness evident in your tone.
"No," Sirius responds, tilting your chin so you can meet his gaze. "I want you to be mine, for real this time."
The fluttering butterflies that dance through your stomach are overwhelming as you absorb his words. A lovesick grin spreads across your lips, unable to contain the rush of emotions coursing through you, “Then I'm all yours."
You settle back into Sirius, and his arms hold you against him. The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest beneath your head lull you into a serene state, the sound of his steady heartbeat serving as a soothing lullaby that guides you into a peaceful sleep.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
"I'm sorry, so you asked us to fake it not for Lily, but for Sirius and I to get together?" You gaze at James, confused, knitting your brows, while he sits opposite you at the table. Remus and Sirius are absorbed in their own conversation, and Peter is having breakfast with the girl he harbors a crush on. Despite their current status as friends, Peter seems overjoyed nonetheless.
James grins, casting you a smug look. "I mean, Lily genuinely thought you and I were a thing. At first, it really was because Lily thought we were together, but then I realized that this was the perfect way to get you and Sirius together.”
“James! So you lied to us?” You huff in disbelief.
James shrugs nonchalantly, his demeanor radiating an air of casual indifference, “You already knew I lied to Lily; what’s the difference?”
You sigh softly, "That's true, but what about you and Lily? Are you two getting together?"
James smiles, “We’ll get there eventually. This was more about you and Sirius. And before you start, yes, I’ll tell her the truth.” He sends you a pointed look, and you chuckle, already preparing to remind him to come clean to Lily.
"You're certifiably insane." You tease, exhaling a laugh.
“Well, it worked, didn’t it? You got the guy.” James watches with delight as a lovesick smile effortlessly graces your face before you steal a glance at Sirius.
"Oh, hey. Pick up your clothes next time you're napping with Sirius," He remarks casually, but the emphasis on the word napping lets you know that he's fully aware there was more happening than just sleep. "My shoe got tangled in your bra."
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