#MY MICROWAVE WAS MOLDY

[superbly-aged-water]

im starting to get why so many batman villains are academics.

the crash out is near.

[pondslime]

read the entirety of annihilation by jeff vandermeer in four hours—by flashlight on my living room floor—during last night's blackout. highly recommend it (the nonstop reading, not the blackout ofc)

[lovenona]

friends and colleagues, today has sucked

[dahliakbs]

Damian Wayne x Child! Reader (Part 1) - This won't do —⁠☆

Synopsis: after seeing the state of your apartment Damian pulls some strings and changes your life on step at a time.

Masterlist , Pillager Of Art

"Are your parents attending the pta meeting?" Damian asks.

After seeing the wretched state your house was in Damian chose to stand at the door.

The moldy yellow floor of your apart was covered in dirt and whatever substances you managed track back into the house. The walls in the same sorry state with a moldy yellow wallpaper that was covered in nasty cracks and stains that could never be removed.

The tiles of your flooring were covered in a bottomless pit of clothes and whatever else was in that pile. Your window didn't show some immaculate view of Gotham City instead it was closed off with would. Glass shards left on the floor in front of the window after a stray bullet was shot through your window.

"Oh my Dad, he's not coming" you say as you make your way towards your kitchen.

Damian couldn't bare looking into the kitchen to see what mess was made in their so he chose to stair the ceiling instead.

"Why not?" He tilts his head to the side, he was told by Alfred that events like these were the only way to see how your child was progressing and apparently it was mandatory for parents to attend so why weren't your coming?

"Oh, my parents are dead" you said as if It didn't bother you and it didn't.

Your mother had sadly passed away during child birth.

Your dad tho...

He was a piece of work, never cared for your well-being AT ALL. You basically raised yourself in this house. The only reason you hadn't starved yet was because your father left food in the cupboard for you to use (mostly unhealthy cheap food).

You barely ever saw your dad and when he died you hadn't even noticed, not like he ever came home anyway. The only way you knew was when the news broadcast came on and you saw a blurred out image of a man that vaguely resembled your father.

There were several gunshot holes scattered around the figures body and by the looks of it he was probably just getting off of work before the death occurred.

The situation never bothered you, having no adults around was a blessing if anything.

"My parents can't come but I'll wait with you until your dad does" you replied and gasped when you found what you were looking for.

"Dami you have to try one" you turned to him with a cup of ramen noodles in hand.

"No thank you, aren't there other options?" he asked as he began to list off foods he'd already eaten before.

Safe to say, you hadn't even know those foods existed or eaten anything that wasn't microwavable.

This wouldn't do.

When he left your house that evening he made it his mission to find a way to get you out of that situation.

And that he did, when the day of the PTA meeting arrives Damian is oddly quiet. Not as if he talked much anyway.

While you both waited for his dad to finish speaking with the teachers he'd a held a tight grip on your hand as if to silently tell you not to run off anywhere.

"Dami I still don't know why you told me to bring all my stuff with me, are we having a sleepover?" You asked, you were told to bring all necessities which means that you needed your tooth brush and whatever you could salvage from that mess of a house.

"You'll know when we get there" he said calmly which only made your excitement grown even more. He was already pretty used to your energetic behavior so this was nothing.

At last the meeting had finished and you were all exiting he building.

"Is this the friend you told me about Damian" his father spoke up only to receive a nod in return.

You had never noticed how eerily similar they look but now that you were stood right before him you realized noticed the shared features.

"(Reader) right" Bruce got down in one knee so he could speak to you at eye level. Now, extending invitations to join the family weren't an everyday occurrence but if his son was so hard pressed on your living conditions and even brought up good points as to why you can't live there.

Plus he knew you were a good kid.

"A little Birdy informed me of your living conditions and they wanted me to extend an exciting offer to you" he spoke to you in a way that made your excitement peak.

You were so excited that you hadn't even noticed when you got in the car or when you arrived at the manor or when you arrived at Damian's bedroom door.

For you everything went by quickly, so quickly that when you woke up the next morning you couldn't even remember why you were in Damian's house or why you were currently bundled up across from his sleeping face.

He must've bundled you up while you were asleep. He was always considerate but rarely ever showed you that side of him.

"Dami, I need to go home" you said groggily.

"Your not going anywhere" he instantly replied.

"But I can't stay here forever, I need to go home" you said in a worried tone but he only raised a brow.

"I knew you weren't listening" he sighed.

"Just go back to sleep" he waved his hand in front if your face which seemed to do the trick because you were knocked out within seconds.

And just like that you were silently adopted into the family.

[rassicas]

hello!! lately i've been thinking about houses/interiors in splatoon as i've been pondering some up for my ocs, & i was wondering if there's any info on them in canon? so far the best that comes to mind is the splat 1 loading screen & that new art of acht, but I was curious on if there's anything about apartments & interiors specifically... tysm! :-]

Unfortunately we don't have much, and considering how much living spaces vary in real life even within the same culture, it's hard to say x thing applies to all splatoon households. the game developers are japanese, the game takes place in japan, and takes inspiration from japanese culture and daily life. taking that into consideration, where canon fails, i use modern japanese living spaces as a reference for imagining what an interior may look like in inkadia. headcanon aside. time to dig up what canon info i've found regarding homes and living spaces

In the Octotune album booklet we get one of the few examples of an inkling home interior, the Houzuki mansion. though pearl, as well all know, is Insanely Fucking Rich and our average inkling is NOT going to be living this luxuriously. one useful tidbit we can get from the text is this:

Q5: Wow! Is this the garage? Pearl: That's just the shoe storage, man.

the word she's using for shoe storage is ゲタばこ which is a cubby you're meant to put your shoes in before entering a house, located in an entryway. in other words, implying a cultural norm of taking your shoes off before entering (something adhered to more strictly in japan vs america). not like this is really followed in official art showing inkfish at home (except for this s1 era piece of an inkling watching tv) probs because shoes are cooler lol

let's see what else ummm bedding.

s1 and s3 dialogue for flounder heights mention futons. traditional japanese bedding typically laid out on the floor when in use, and folded up and put away in a big cubby during the day. its a common sight to see them hung out in the sun on the balcony to not get moldy. some of those things draped over the railings in flounder heights are futons.

not everyone in japan does this though- youll still see western style beds or even futons on bed frames since taking it out and putting it away is a pain in the ass. also not every apartment has a built in proper futon storage space. (...mine does, but i repurposed it into another closet and just use western style bedding lol)

same is true for inkadians too -the bed in the s1 splashscreen doesnt look like a futon to me. point is there's options for what do with the bed situation.

speaking of the apartment splashscreen for s1, there is a blurb in the artbook about it and how inklings are typically pretty tidy with their living spaces.

im sure there's plenty of messy inklings too. anyway there's just a few tidbits about living spaces in relation to canon info. unfortunately there's Nothing about the bathroom or how they bathe, though previously i shared my headcanons about how i think that could work. for the kitchen i think all we can do is assume. Acht has a fridge how surprising /s at the start i mentioned that i take inspo from japanese life where canon fails. ive spent a few years in japan so this works conveniently for me LOL but i assume most people following me do not have that experience. so for those who wanna take that japan inspo too, here's a few small things that are different in japanese living spaces that ive thought may be true for inkopolis? -living spaces are so much smaller on average (of course) -washing machines do not use heated water and like Nobody has a drier in their house. laundry is hung on the balcony, or by the window if there is none, to dry. you want a drying machine? go to the laundromat. -big ovens? like for baking? casseroles? this is Rare in japanese homes. more likely youll see like a little toaster oven. microwaves with an oven setting. i have a gas stove with a fish grill drawer like this. ive never seen this in america but i KNOW in my heart inklings would have this -tiniest fucking kitchens sometimes. a pattern ive often seen for little one room apartments is a pathetic kitchen space in the hall between the entrance and bedtoom where its like. one sink. and space for an electric burner. you want counter space go fuck yourself. if youre a broke inkling who doesnt cook much this may be the option for you. -i think every house ive been in has had a genkan in some form.

[i-love-ptv]

Family Reunion Whenever I’m Home ᓚᘏᗢ

Pairing: Boyfriend!JJ Maybank x Witch!Girlfriend!Reader

Based on the prompt: “Wait, wait, wait! What are you doing?” “What? I need to heat up the potion.” “In the microwave?” (another pinterest prompt, ik guys..)

Wc: 1,661

Fluff—Thanksgiving diner!! JJ gets a boner but no smut or anything like that!

An: First off, HI GUYS!!! thought i’d put this out for yall cause i think it’s cute, better than thanksgiving (i hate thanksgiving sorry) so ya!!

also!!!!! reader is written to kind-of be like a fairytail witch? i’m not super like, educated on witchcraft n all that jazz, so i tried to make sure it wouldn’t offend anyone in any way!! (lmk if there’s any problems i love you all)

Feedback is always appreciated and welcomed!! xoxo

“JJ, they’re almost here! Hurry up and set the table!” You giggle as JJ pressed another kiss to the crook of your neck.

“‘S fine…I’m sure they’ll be willin’ to help anyways.” JJ murmurs against your cold skin.

November 28th; Thanksgiving. The day where you get together with your friends and family, and spend the day together sharing thanks, food, and laughs.

Hence why the pogues, alongside the soon-to-be born baby pogue, are coming over to your and JJ’s shared home for dinner.

You’ve been cooking all day, finishing up what you didn’t yesterday, with no help from JJ of course.

It’s not like he didn’t offer, he definitely tried to take ahold of your cooking spoon.

…Which resulted in a swat sent to his hand.

You “banished” —JJ’s words, not yours, to clean the house while you cooked. It’s very apparent that JJ can’t cook to save his life, you also can’t rely on him to get a real meal in his system, or anything healthy.

You still think about the time where he ate moldy bread to this very day.

Thankfully, the rest of the pogues agreed to bring food as well, so you didn’t have to make much; the only problem is, they’re arriving soon and for some reason, the table is still not set.

Your boyfriend's hands continue to wander down your body, which doesn’t help your growing irritation. Not necessarily at him, but at the lack of acknowledgement to your pleas.

“Jackson,” You speak lowly, immediately catching JJ’s attention. You’re using that voice that’ll make him do anything you please in a heartbeat. He’s obsessed with the fact that his normally soft-spoken girl can straighten him out.

You continue, “Can you set the table for me, baby?” JJ breaks away, clearing his throat.

“Yeah, yeah. Of course…” He mutters before turning around to the table. You start to feel bad, but all your feelings of guilt disappear once you notice the pink tint on his cheeks and the ever-growing boner he’s sporting.

“God, Jay. I mean, what the hell?”

The golden-haired boy puts his hands up as his mouth practically hits the floor.

“Well, what do you expect?! My super hot, witch girlfriend gets all stern with me, and-and you expect me not to feel some ‘typa way?!” JJ exclaims.

You roll your eyes at his antics, but your attention is drawn elsewhere when you notice your cat lurking on the counter.

“Down! Get down, Lottie!” You half-heartedly yelp, making a ‘shoo’ motion towards her; her wide eyes merely bore back at you.

You grab her then hear your doorbell ring, which makes the three of you jump, Lottie ends up wandering away.

“Go fix that, Jay.” You’re moving quickly, mainly to distract yourself from looking at the boy you’ve grown to love. You know that one glance will start something that neither of you are able to finish.

JJ hobbles off to your shared bathroom, murmuring curse words under his breath as you reach the door.

When it opens, Sarah pushes her way through first—well, her bump does.

“Oh my gosh! I’ve missed you so much!” She yells, making you wince, but your smile never leaves your lips. It’s an awkward hug for sure, but neither of you mind.

John B comes through next, sheepishly. He lets out a “sorry about her” while he adjusts the pan in his hands.

“Uh, where do you want me to put this?” John B asks, his eyes lingering on the half-set table.

You purse your lips, taking one between your teeth, “On the counter is fine for now.”

“—Please don’t drop it…” “I’m not going to drop it!” You hear shouts coming from the front lawn. You wobble your way over with Sarah still latched onto you when you see Cleo and Pope walking towards you.

Pope’s carrying what you assume is mac and cheese, and Cleo holds a ham, which is rather big in her hands.

They greet you both warmly, to which you reply timidly. It’s not that you had any problem with them, quite the opposite! But the only person to really get you out of your shell was JJ. Kie claims that it’s probably because he was your “first love” since the beginning.

Speaking of her, Kiara, alongside her girlfriend Monica, is walking up to your door with a dazzling grin. Everyone exchanges kind words; the boys offer to set the table, making you accept their act of service almost immediately.

“Mmm, it smells so good Bats!” Sarah groans, wafting the air, Kiara agrees with her.

“Where’s rude boy?” Cleo asks with a smirk. But before you could respond, JJ comes out of the bedroom with his arms stretched out wide.

“Right here, howdy y’all!” JJ nearly throws himself at the pogues, welcoming them all in a group hug.

“Hey, Jay?”

“Yeah B?” JJ turns to the brunette.

“Your fly’s down, bud.” John B snickers, then pats JJ on the back, leaving JJ fumbling with his pants with his ears burning red.

Boisterous laughter rings throughout the halls of the cluttered but cozy home; the table’s been set, the food is ready, and everyone’s in place to eat.

Pope’s rambling on about god knows what as of right now, so you take the opportunity to head to the kitchen undetected.

JJ can hardly hear over the [somewhat] playful screaming match between John B and Kiara. But faintly, he can hear the sound of bottles and pots clanging about in the kitchen.

He gets up from his seat, and JJ’s nearly tip-toeing over. He hears a few mumbled curse words followed by a few clicks and beeps.

JJ sees you: his sweet, gentle, oblivious, spell-casting lover. —And soon to be wife. Your frame blocks his view of what you’re standing in front of, but JJ can easily identify the low humming coming from the microwave.

You take a step back, making JJ take one forward towards you. Your hands are cupped together but remain low in front of you, and he can just barely make out the sight of you looking fondly into the lit up glass.

JJ looks over your shoulder, and his charming smile fades as he sees the glass bottle filled with a liquid he can’t even distinguish spinning slowly in circles.

“Wait, wait, wait! What are you doing?” JJ whisper-shouts.

You jump at the unexpected hands placed on your shoulder, letting out a gasp as you turn around.

You blink at him all doe-like, and JJ feels his resolve slipping all ready. “What? I need to heat up the potion.”

“In the microwave? Really, baby?” JJ tilts his head at you, it reminds you of a puppy-dog. His warm hands continue to rub up and down on your sleeve-covered arms.

“…Well, we haven’t been able to fully unpack all of my stuff, remember? You’ve been busy with work this week.” Your confusion never leaves your face. That’s when JJ remembers.

JJ and you have finally moved in together; meaning no more bed hopping between the chateau and your parents’ house. Everything’s been unpacked and placed carefully throughout the small house, except for your cauldron; alongside your books, bowls, daggers, and pretty much all of your stuff unfortunately.

JJ’s guilt is crawling up his throat; you had reassured him several times that you didn’t mind, and it wasn’t a pressing matter. But when you’re looking at him so sweetly, and your obliviousness to the situation rings deep, JJ’s heart can’t help but feel a pang.

You tear your eyes away from the boy once you hear the ‘beep, beep, beep’ from the rickety appliance.

You grab the bottle out of the microwave, and hold it so that it’s leveled with JJ’s eyes. Now that he can get a good look at it, JJ takes in its appearance. The liquid is somewhat of a sage green color (JJ barely even knows what that is), and it has some floating bits inside, but it doesn’t look nearly as gnarly as some of the other things you’ve concocted.

“Do ya think Sarah would drink this if I asked her to? It’s an elixir made to help and protect her and the baby. I’m not very worried about John B.” JJ swears he’s listening, honestly! He is! But at the same time, he’s really only focusing on the cute scrunch your face is making and your curious eyes.

You look at him awaiting an answer, “Mmm, how about we wait a little bit before we start giving Sarah all your fancy potions, huh cupcake?”

JJ’s flashing that grin at you that makes you weak in the knees, and all you can do is pout at him.

“Awee..Okay,” you drag out, your voice remains hushed.

JJ takes your hand in his, and you let him guide you to the table, where you’re met with boasting and a few questions directed from John B of course.

JJ pulls your chair out for you, and then sits himself right beside you, even going as far as to scoot his wooden chair even closer to yours. You both are sitting so close that your thighs are smushed together, and you find yourself craving it; craving his warmth.

“So were you guys boning in there or what?” There's a chorus of “John B!”’s and “oh my god”’s let out amongst the entire group. You cover your face and cower into JJ’s side.

“Alright, shut up man!” JJ yells, but you know there’s no form of malice in it.

You let out a giggle once you uncover your eyes and see Kiara and John B going back and forth once more; Pope and Cleo also jumping in from time to time. JJ looks down at you: leaning on him, with a bright smile on your face, he can’t help but feel a sense of pride.

This was his family, and he wouldn’t change it for the world.

[mousegirlheart]

i worked at hungry jacks (Australian burger king) for like 3 days before i was suddenly forced to quit due to unexpected homelessness when i was 18 and holy shit i could not work in a kitchen ever again. my manager made me use moldy cheese slices and then broke her hand in the burger microwave guillotine door

[numberonetacostan]

In honor of the season 1 remaster episode 2, my second favorite episode in season 1, could i get some Pickle and Taco headcanons pretty please with a cherry on top of a mile high pie

Hi Moldy!!^^ Welcome back, and thank you for sending your request!! :]

Ask and you shall receive, Pickle and Taco headcanons!!

So, I like to think Taco still eats and carries around a ton of lemons after season 1. There's a lemon tree in her shell, she hangs out around the lemon trees from season 1 (since I tend to think season 2 takes places closer to the hotel, and thus on the other side of the island, yeah? so no one really goes over there all that much; it's safe for her to be out in the open. though she'd still hide inside the trees for comfort), she has many many many lemons. She likes them!! And this is not a thing she mentions until post s2 finale when she's giving the others food from her stockpile while they're getting everything set up. And, sorry for mentioning another another another headcanon within a headcanon, I like to think that when she dies, all the stuff in her shell gets messed up. She keeps it, yes, but it all gets jumbled around and she can't find things easily. The best way to organize again is to take everything out and put it back in neatly. So uh. Very awkward moment in front of Pickle and some other s1 cast members in which she is pulling copious amounts of lemons out of her shell. So so so awkward, no one is having a good time, dear god how does she have so many lemons. She apologizes many times throughout the process, most of which are directed towards Pickle.

Another thing in Taco's shell, I like to think she has the same picture of them that Pickle does in episode 7. She doesn't have a frame for her copy, but since it was in her shell, it survives the MeLife takedown and comes back out with her. It would be so very fun if it gets taken out with the others things while she's trying to organize in the aforementioned headcanon. It would also be very fun if Pickle was the one to find it and just. Quietly pick it up and pass it to her. For the sake of not giving you a third headcanons revolving around Taco's shell, please just note that I like to think she has his old eyepatch in there too.

I think Pickle would not take very good care of himself immediately post s1. In gijinka form, I like to think he has really really pretty and nice and thick and long way black hair, but puts it up in a bun and stops taking care of it entirely for quite some time. But this isn't about gijinkas!! This is about regular Pickle, the one who is a pickle, and his eating habits!! Brother is living on snacks and microwave meals, he doesn't have the energy to cook something healthy. After a few weeks, he tried to suck it up and say that Taco wouldn't control him anymore and that he was going to make some damn good food for himself. He then opens up the fridge and sees lettuce and tomatoes and is immediately back down in the depths of his depression.

Speaking of Pickle in his depression, I think he'd once wish that Taco was dead. In the same vein in wishing they'd never met or that he'd never befriended her, though he thinks this during a particularly bad night after a string of particularly bad nights. And, well, I think he'd feel awful about it after that. This is soon after they've parted ways, he is so very hurt but feels a lot of affection for her still!! I'd imagine him holding the picnic photo against his chest and sobbing while he stutters out apologies and tells her, the her in the photo, that he didn't mean it.

Uhhh you probably wanted s1 paco joy and fluff since you were asking along the lines of the remaster my brain did not go that way I'm sorry uhhhhh fluff uhhhh had Pickle not eaten his 'girlfriend', please accept the idea that he would have chopped the cucumber up into slices and put them into Taco so they could be matching. Taking inspiration from your Taco toppings ask from a while back, although cucumbers don't usually get put in tacos as far as I know, please consider this would switch her from playing dumb to actually being dumb. It's no longer a facade, Mephone made him to not be very smart and that part of his was just physically inserted into Taco. Mephone gets used to it and it becomes part of her default design. She is dumb and silly and frankly a lot happier all things considered and they are best friends forever the end.

[steddielations]

flight of icarus spoilers

Something so heartwarming and gut-wrenching about the development of Wayne and Eddie's relationship:

So, Eddie lives alone in his dad's house (on and off, he goes to stay with Wayne for long stretches throughout his life, but at the start of the book he's 18 and has been there alone for months, by his choice) and Wayne checks in on him and brings him food.

Eddie mentions that Wayne's own shelves are pretty empty, but he always makes sure Eddie's are at least half stocked with things like tv dinners that he knows Eddie can eat easily. Eddie says "Wayne has a pet theory that I can't feed myself, so every two weeks or so I'll come home to find him shoving microwave dinners and canned soup onto the cluttered shelves and into the moldy refrigerator."

When Al shows back up, he belittles this, and says he’ll make Eddie a real meal (mind you he left Eddie with nothing but stale peanut butter and flat soda for days when he was 8) which then turns out to be a big spaghetti dinner over which he manipulates the shit out of Eddie, and dangles the prospect of them moving to California together in front of him, saying they'll make a tradition out of Spaghetti Saturdays. To which Eddie responds, "Like a real family?" (ouch) Of course, that doesn't happen.

But then!! When Eddie moves in with Wayne at the end of the book, he notices that Wayne made an effort to stock vegetables in the fridge. Vegetables. It surprises Eddie and they end up wilting because Eddie just doesn’t know how to react to such a clear act of care towards him. And I just hope they had plenty of family dinners after that (Excerpts below)

(ignore my highlighting it’s irrelevant)

Al leaving Eddie ⬇️

Wayne’s empty shelves ⬇️

Al belittling the food Wayne brings ⬇️

manipulation for dinner ⬇️

Eddie doesn’t know how to react to Wayne’s care (vegetables) ⬇️

[ladylooch]

What is Mack's reaction to finding out she was busted cuddling with David? Xx

“Oh my god.” Mack moans, stumbling out of her dark bedroom and into the sunny, main area of her apartment. “Jesus take the wheel.” She cries, slapping a hand over her eyes. She squints to her kitchen counter, seeing David there, munching on some cereal. His mustache curls up with this lips joyfully when he sees her.

“Hi honey.” He says gently. “How you doing?”

“Shitty.” Mack moans. She is exhausted and feels like she has been run over by a damn garbage truck. Actually, she feels like garbage. Maybe the truck should have just picked her up instead of running her over.

“Think you could eat some soup? Get some nutrients into you?” He asks, standing up. He walks over to her, wrapping an arm around her waist. He was getting nervous watching how shaky she was with each step. Mack leans into his strength, grateful for his help. She glances over at the mirror in her entry way, catching a glimpse of her appearance.

“Oh, fuck me.” She groans. She looks disgusting, like she smells similar to moldy cheese and BO. Then there is David, who looks like some he is about to be chiseled out of stone with his black sweatpants and shirtless chest. “You don’t have to stay.” She shakes her head.

“Ah, I know.” He chuckles, biting his lip as he gets her onto the couch. “But I’m not leaving.”

“Why?”

“Because this is the only place I wanna be.” He leans forward. Mack slaps her hand over her mouth.

“Don’t kiss me!” She mumbles around her fingers. His lips land on her forehead.

“Stop worrying. Just lay there and be useless so you can get better and be my sassy girl again.” He pats her leg. “I’m gonna heat up the soup Lucie brought.” 

“No.” Mack extends the word in shock.

“Yeah. She saw us in bed together.” He sighs, opening up the container from the fridge. He pours some in a microwaveable bowl, then puts it in for two minutes to start. 

“What did she say?” Mack whispers, eyes boring into him.

“Not much, but I wasn’t exactly inviting the conversation either.” He scratches at the under side of his jaw. He leans his palms on the counter top, staring at her. “She asked what we were.” Mack’s eyes slide away. “Yeah, that’s what I thought, so I didn’t give her an answer.” Mack’s eyebrows furrow. 

“What you thought?”

“That you aren’t ready for a label.” 

“I’m not?” She asks. “You want me to be your girlfriend?” Her tone is doubtful. David stares at her. 

“I think I’ve made that pretty obvious, Mack.” She tucks her bottom lip into her mouth, looking away.  “But if you wanna keep doing this, I’m fine with that too. I’m not in a rush, buttercup.” He turns back to the microwave, stirring the soup around then giving it a taste test. “Another minute.” He tells her. Mack turns away from him, curling her legs up beneath her.

David Carlson’s girlfriend… Mackenzie Hischier… officially dating a New York Ranger. Mack licks her lips, wanting to ignore the parts of her that long for and are giddy about that idea. She wasn’t looking for this. She didn’t want it either. It became this because David is… David. 

“It’s hot, baby.” The man in question says as he rounds the couch. Mack watches him move a coaster to rest her bowl on. 

“Thank you.” She murmurs. “For last night too. I was in a bad place.” 

“You were. I’m glad I came over.” He brushes her wild hair off her cheek, tucking it behind her ear. His thumb strokes across her red and inflamed skin, irritated from her feverish sweats last night. Mack stares at him, drawing her eyes over the features of this man she has come to care so much for. They have great chemistry. It is so much more than just sexual too. She feels like he knows her heart and soul, and does what he can to keep them both safe. Mack opens her mouth to speak, to tell him that she wants to be his girlfriend too. 

“Yes you can be my girlfriend..” He cuts her off while grinning at her. Mack furrows her eyebrows, mouth dropped open in awe.

“How do you know?” She shakes her head, rolling her eyes. He stops her from falling back and away from him in exasperation. He leans down, capturing her lips in his. He inhales her mouth until her lips are puffy and swollen, her nose and upper lip raw from his mustache. 

“Because I do.” 

Mack grabs his shirt, fisting it in her hand to keep him close. She scoots back onto the couch, weakly attempting to pull him down. David obliges, settling a knee between her legs, then easing her all the way back until she is laying on the couch. 

“Honey. You need to eat your soup.” 

“I wanna make out with my boyfriend first.” David chuckles. 

“You’re so obsessed with me.” He teases. His tongue thrusts into her mouth, not letting her respond with words.

Her strangled, blissful moan tells them both all they need to know.

[rotten-pain]

I'll probably be talking about her all day today, but I've been reminded of when I was in a mental hospital as a kid and was happy to stay as long as they wanted me, when my mom called to check on me I innocently said something like, "I don't mind it here", and when I came home I was told I could never be hospitalized again because I was "only using it as an excuse to get away from her." [She hospitalized me herself because I was self harming regularly and was experiencing constant depersonalization and derealization]

Maybe subconsciously I was avoiding her too, but our trailer also had no insulation. No electricity. It had several holes in the walls and ceiling, a convenient one by the front door for our 10 neglected indoor-outdoor free roam cats and a few in the ceiling so we can make use of the rain buckets. one bathroom had no floor and you could fall straight onto the ground if you went in. We all shared a bathroom with no door, we had to walk through mom's room to get to it and our privacy was a red sheet hanging in the doorway. Our "living room" was a moldy hoarded unlovable mass, the stove was just sitting in the middle of the room, usually open to get some little bit of heat in a house full of holes that got so cold I had to sit 2 inches away from the space heater to get a little warm. [They were connected to a giant extension cord setup hooked up to my grandpa's house] We lived on microwave meals, especially those Banquet pot pies. I don't remember mom being home much, probably because it was fucking miserable and she had the means to leave.

My friend had also shot himself, dead, and I was going to a new school where I felt hated by everyone and was trying to be a stealth boy in a school where we were segregated by what genitals we had.

So yeah maybe I avoided her a little bit, but she was the least of my priorities of things to run away from.

But I'm sure preventing your kid from actually receiving care, good food, good shelter, regular showers and regularly cleaned clothes is much more important to save you from your own fear of abandonment.

[cpunkwitch]

Herb Drying Extended

[herb drying extended]

Herb drying(link)

Answering Benji in an extension to my last post on the topic!

best method, best tea

depending on the herb you use to make your tea, any of the three methods i talked about can work just fine for making a tea blend from.

it's most a matter of time as each method and plant have a different time span of drying out.

air drying by hanging is likely the longest but is most commonly used for flowering herbs like lavender or even sage, mainly for the lingering scent they give off while hanging.

you could very well use the microwave method for a faster batch of dried herbs.

when it comes to the herb youre using for tea, leaves and buds could be crushed up or steeped whole, so regardless of the method you choose however you go about making your tea from dried herbs is fine and completely up to you.

of course things like how ling they sit to dry and loose theor moisture can effect how they might taste when sitting in hot water but not by very much, the amount of time they sit in the water can be recommended differently depending on the plant or part of said plant as well.

its perfectly fine to experiment until you find the right combination that you like best.

there are plenty of other methods for drying tea herbs as well, some onclude the oven rather than the microwave or the stove, or you can use tools like a dehydrator if you have one. no one method is best over all, its very much up to opinion.

whatever method you find best is a-okay.

moldy stash

how can herbs expire after storing and drying if the idea is to do that so they last longer?

a lot of things have a different length of shelf life, canned goods included.

if you dont keep your herbs tightly seald and stored awat from sunlight and moisture, you risk them rotting amd molding. they are dead plants after all and dead plants do eventually rot away at some point.

the average shelf life for dried leafy herbs is 1-3 years before it looses its flavor, 4 years for seeds and a week to 6 months for fresh (ground) spices. salt is really the only thing that lasts indefinitely.

after the dried herbs loose their flavor theres really no use keeping them around as anything with them will just taste bland or very very mild if at all.

the herbs will start to lose their colour and brown after being stored for that long so its best to throw them away at the 3 year mark.

i hope this helped! if theres anything else i can expand on please let me know.

@benji-screem @kodiescove @writingbrainrot

(thought you might like to see)

I'd for banner in pinned

[angry-pcos-memon]

Hey. I seriously need to get this off my chest.

I’m so tired. Like, not just tired-tired. Soul tired. I’ve been holding everything up around here while my mom’s been in and out of the hospital — nearly died, had to be cut open, had a wound vac, kidney problems, blood infection, the whole damn horror show. And who’s been doing everything? Me.

I get maybe 24–30 hours of work a week at barely above minimum wage. I get paid biweekly and still cover $160 for phones (hers, mine, our hotspot, everything), and every damn grocery trip falls on me. I’ve been spending $180–$345 every two weeks just on food, toilet paper, Tylenol, whatever-the-hell-we-need to survive. And he — my mom’s boyfriend — just… exists. Like a roach that thinks it's royalty.

He sits on the couch like some retired god of laziness, watching COPS and the same five episodes of Texas Metal like it’s sacred scripture. Never lifts a finger unless it’s to point blame or pour another drink. Meanwhile, I’m taking care of chickens he gave me — 10 hens and a rooster — and selling eggs for $4 a dozen. And guess who gets to keep none of the money? Yep. He calls it the “feed fund” while I’m the one who’s actually bought feed out of my own pocket.

Oh, and when my mom was actively dying in the hospital, I was there twice a day, brushing her hair, cleaning her feet, being present. What did he do? Timed my visits from the parking lot while sitting with the dogs, then strutted in for five minutes like he deserved applause for breathing next to her. Because “he doesn’t like hospitals.” Cool. I don’t like being 25 and having to be a nurse, housekeeper, grocery delivery service, emotional support human, AND tech support for a 75-year-old man who permanently locked himself out of his iPhone and blames the Wi-Fi.

He literally screamed at me because I couldn’t read his mind and magically know the six-digit code he forgot while drunk and stoned. Then got mad that my Xbox was connected to the TV even though I saved him over $1,200 a year by showing him how to watch Tubi for free. He can't figure out how to use a controller but refuses to let me help. Screams because it’s not a “normal remote.”

Meanwhile, this genius criticizes my mom for brushing her tongue — says he’s “never done that in his life.” No shit, Sherlock. The sink looks like a science experiment every morning. He still doesn’t know how to brush his teeth without spit-painting the bathroom. Don’t even get me started on the moldy foil he hoards behind the microwave like it’s precious treasure and pulls a whole-ass GUN when you try to throw it away.

AND — cherry on top — today he made my recovering mom drive me to work because he was “tired.” Tired of WHAT, exactly? You don’t cook, you don’t clean, and you sure as hell don’t care that the woman you claim to love nearly DIED.

He even told her “it’s been a month, you should be over this by now.” Meanwhile, when he stubs his toe he acts like he’s survived a war zone. Wants to pop her pain meds and moan about “his pain” while she’s literally holding her insides in with gauze and a wound pump.

I’m just… done. Burnt out. Furious. I’ve spent weeks bottling this and I’m starting to shake from the pressure. I'm tired of being the one who fixes everything and gets treated like I’m overreacting for finally saying anything.

Anyway, I know that was long. I just had to say it somewhere.

[10piecechickenmcnugget]

Food headcanon for Oli and Joel?

Also guess who was once again sent to superhell for autism reasons (hit post limit)

LLLL get sent to autism jail idiot /silly

joel is a good cook. he can make almost anything with just some guessing. he likes to eyeball measurements and it drives lizzie insane. he has what he calls a “sophisticated palette” and likes to do meal planning and all that

oli, on the other hand, considers it a win if he makes himself a sandwich instead of eating microwave ramen and a container of half moldy blueberries. he’s not very picky, and he spent a good few years of his life scavenging for food in the fucking woods and carried the “i need to eat literally i can get my hands on that isn’t poisonous” mentality into the rest of his life even though his situation is a lot less dire now even if he is poor as shit (L) he likes to eat out at sketchy cheap fast food restaurants when he can

(send me headcanon asks boy)

[disconnected-from-the-sea]

Update, it's been 3 months since the last journal post. That apartment was absolute dogshit!!!! It had visible water damage behind the ceiling in the living room about the sliding door, the fridge was moldy, the microwave was broken, there was drywall dust everywhere from the repaint, the floor was the most never shit, there was an insane draft under the sliding door, there was a leak under the bathroom sink, AND the heat didn't work day one. In March. In northern Ohio.

This was all day one. The same hour I picked up my keys.

The heat got fixed, the appliances got replaced, the sink leak got fixed. But even now, three months later, the ceiling still drips and the sliding door leaks whenever it rains. They're planning to fix the roof any day now they say, but I asked about fixing the door and the reply was "We have no plans to replace the door".

I've almost finished moving out now, into my partners condo. Because a week ago, after running the A/C at a reasonable temperature for about a week, roughly two GALLONS of nasty ass brown water dumped out of the bathroom ceiling where the A/C condenser and blower lives.

I've got some stuff moving around to get me out of my lease, but I'm moving out and they're not getting another penny out of me for that shithole.

And so, I'm experiencing domestic bliss. I live with my Honey, we sleep together, we eat together, I get to see her every day. She is the moon, and stars, and everything bright and beautiful in my sky. I am so entirely in love, and lemme tell ya that shit rules my guy.

[why-rock-look-tasty-if-no-eat]

I grew up being as poor as can be imagined. Often times I only got to eat a meal day, and those were school lunches. A favorite childhood snack is angel hair pasta. Uncooked because we couldn't afford the pasta sauce or ingredients needed to make it, so I'd eat the noodles straight from the box. For two years as a small child (specifically between the ages of 6-10) I had to survive off of the catfish I caught with my sperm donor for my family to eat when we couldn't afford the hot dogs (without the buns or condiments, because we couldn't afford those either. Then our microwave oven broke so we started eating them straight from the packaging as well).

One of my formative memories was when I was around five years old, I woke up during pre-dawn because of how hungry I was. It was during Winter, I had on a pink ballerina night gown and I was staring into the empty food cupboard wishing I had something to eat.

I think it was around then that I started eating whatever, whenever, because now that I'm in my 20s I joke with my friends about the standards I have for eating food. Rotting, moldy, fell on the floor, covered in stuff, stale, burnt, expired, bad taste, possibly tampered with, I'll eat it if I think my immune system and digestive tract can handle it.

Another reason why I abhor any food waste is because I've been forcibly starved twice. The first time(s) was over weekends from my sperm donors now ex-gf when I was at his place over a period of months for about a year or more when I was between 11-12. The second time I was in quarantine and the people delivering my food kept forgetting about me so it wouldn't be uncommon for me to not get a meal a day. There's technically a third but that was voluntary, and was to save the family some extra money when I was a teenager.

I could get into more, but I think I might have ranted and scarred anyone who reads this enough. Sorry for the trauma dump, but I really do hate it when food waste is shown. At least save the food instead of throwing it away . . . it's one thing that I will always scrutinize, who the fuck just chucks food into the trash?! Well, I can guess who might, but most of the time the characters doing it don't have EDs written in, and if they do they usually don't suffer from it anymore. Sorry for another rant, I'll leave this off here though. Thanks for humoring me if you've read everything

people in books and tv shows are always getting so upset they throw an untouched meal in the trash. that would never be me. i'd receive the worst news of my life and still be like Let me put this in the fridge.