#SAME goes for men and for those with disabilities...

[pixieswashere]

I can't tell you how deeply hurt and sick I feel after realizing that three side/main female characters that are tied to the ships that got canon, which I still respect and love....ended up at the cost of these women having their agency removed or villainized. I literally feel like im gonna have a breakdown.....

[cocklessboy]

The biggest male privilege I have so far encountered is going to the doctor.

I lived as a woman for 35 years. I have a lifetime of chronic health issues including chronic pain, chronic fatigue, respiratory issues, and neurodivergence (autistic + ADHD). There's so much wrong with my body and brain that I have never dared to make a single list of it to show a doctor because I was so sure I would be sent directly to a psychologist specializing in hypochondria (sorry, "anxiety") without getting a single test done.

And I was right. Anytime I ever tried to bring up even one of my health issues, every doctor's initial reaction was, at best, to look at me with doubt. A raised eyebrow. A seemingly casual, offhand question about whether I'd ever been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. Even female doctors!

We're not talking about super rare symptoms here either. Joint pain. Chronic joint pain since I was about 19 years old. Back pain. Trouble breathing. Allergy-like reactions to things that aren't typically allergens. Headaches. Brain fog. Severe insomnia. Sensitivity to cold and heat.

There's a lot more going on than that, but those were the things I thought I might be able to at least get some acknowledgement of. Some tests, at least. But 90% of the time I was told to go home, rest, take a few days off work, take some benzos (which they'd throw at me without hesitation), just chill out a bit, you'll be fine. Anxiety can cause all kinds of odd symptoms.

Anyone female-presenting reading this is surely nodding along. Yup, that's just how doctors are.

Except...

I started transitioning about 2.5 years ago. At this point I have a beard, male pattern baldness, a deep voice, and a flat chest. All of my doctors know that I'm trans because I still haven't managed to get all the paperwork legally changed, but when they look at me, even if they knew me as female at first, they see a man.

I knew men didn't face the same hurdles when it came to health care, but I had no idea it was this different.

The last time I saw my GP (a man, fairly young, 30s or so), I mentioned chronic pain, and he was concerned to see that it wasn't represented in my file. Previous doctors hadn't even bothered to write it down. He pushed his next appointment back to spend nearly an hour with me going through my entire body while I described every type of chronic pain I had, how long I'd had it, what causes I was aware of. He asked me if I had any theories as to why I had so much pain and looked at me with concerned expectation, hoping I might have a starting point for him. He immediately drew up referrals for pain specialists (a profession I didn't even know existed till that moment) and physical therapy. He said depending on how it goes, he may need to help me get on some degree of disability assistance from the government, since I obviously shouldn't be trying to work full-time under these circumstances.

Never a glimmer of doubt in his eye. Never did he so much as mention the word "anxiety".

There's also my psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with ADHD last year (meeting me as a man from the start, though he knew I was trans). He never doubted my symptoms or medical history. He also took my pain and sleep issues seriously from the start and has been trying to help me find medications to help both those things while I go through the long process of seeing other specialists. I've had bad reactions to almost everything I've tried, because that's what always happens. Sometimes it seems like I'm allergic to the whole world.

And then, just a few days ago, the most shocking thing happened. I'd been wondering for a while if I might have a mast cell condition like MCAS, having read a lot of informative posts by @thebibliosphere which sounded a little too relatable. Another friend suggested it might explain some of my problems, so I decided to mention it to the psychiatrist, fully prepared to laugh it off. Yeah, a friend thinks I might have it, I'm not convinced though.

His response? That's an interesting theory. It would be difficult to test for especially in this country, but that's no reason not to try treatments and see if they are helpful. He adjusted his medication recommendations immediately based on this suggestion. He's researching an elimination diet to diagnose my food sensitivities.

I casually mentioned MCAS, something routinely dismissed by doctors with female patients, and he instantly took the possibility seriously.

That's it. I've reached peak male privilege. There is nothing else that could happen that could be more insane than that.

I literally keep having to hold myself back from apologizing or hedging or trying to frame my theories as someone else's idea lest I be dismissed as a hypochondriac. I told the doctor I'd like to make a big list of every health issue I have, diagnosed and undiagnosed, every theory I've been given or come up with myself, and every medication I've tried and my reactions to it - something I've never done because I knew for a fact no doctor would take me seriously if they saw such a list all at once. He said it was a good idea and could be very helpful.

Female-presenting people are of course not going to be surprised by any of this, but in my experience, male-presenting people often are. When you've never had a doctor scoff at you, laugh at you, literally say "I won't consider that possibility until you've been cleared by a psychologist" for the most mundane of health problems, it might be hard to imagine just how demoralizing it is. How scary it becomes going to the doctor. How you can internalize the idea that you're just imagining things, making a big deal out of nothing.

Now that I'm visibly a man, all of my doctors are suddenly very concerned about the fact that I've been simply living like this for nearly four decades with no help. And I know how many women will have to go their whole lives never getting that help simply because of sexism in the medical field.

If you know a doctor, show them this story. Even if they are female. Even if they consider themselves leftists and feminists and allies. Ask them to really, truly, deep down, consider whether they really treat their male and female patients the same. Suggest that the next time they hear a valid complaint from a male patient, imagine they were a woman and consider whether you'd take it seriously. The next time they hear a frivolous-sounding complaint from a female patient, imagine they were a man and consider whether it would sound more credible.

It's hard to unlearn these biases. But it simply has to be done. I've lived both sides of this issue. And every doctor insists they treat their male and female patients the same. But some of the doctors astonished that I didn't get better care in the past are the same doctors who dismissed me before.

I'm glad I'm getting the care I need, even if it is several decades late. And I'm angry that it took so long. And I'm furious that most female-presenting people will never have this chance.

[leihaddock]

Let's imagine Steve and Bucky who were well established in their local queer community. Because they lived in one of the few underground queer cities at the time, and it seems damn near impossible that they *wouldn't* know other queer people

Actually, for that, we probably should talk about Sarah first:

as a nurse she saw it as her duty to help anyone and everyone, no question asked and no matter where they come from, and soon developed a reputation for just that

so she had all sorts of people come to her for help

including queer folks in gender and/or sexuality, what we'd nowadays call drag queens and kings, disabled folks, people of colour, jews and so on

little Stevie grows up around a very diverse group of people

when he was only a couple of years old, he asked Sarah ie why that woman had a beard, and she'd explained to him that there are all kinds of people and there was nothing wrong with being "transsexual" or with men liking other men or women liking other women

and that if he ever found out he was like them, she wouldn't care and love him all the same

and that was one of the lessons that stayed with him, along with always getting back up, always protecting those in need of protection, and later from his own experiences, that he didn't like bullies

the community Sarah builds around herself ends up protecting Steve more than once, no matter how much he hates accepting help

So at some point Steve and Bucky meet and befriend each other and become inseparable. And of course the older they get the more people talk. That they're too close, that that sickly Rogers boy is a fairy (or that he's a waste of oxygen and should be dead, let alone ever reproduce), that there are so many pretty girls for Bucky to choose from. You get the idea

Sarah of course figures out they're dating pretty much immediately. she knows her son, she loves Bucky like her own like she knows the Barnes family does in turn for Steve

To me the Barnes family is supportive but it took them some time because they're the "ideal" middle class family and their oldest son being a fairy wasn't quite ideal but they love Steve and Bucky too much to give a rat's ass about it later on

and with all the people Steve grew up knowing and introduced Bucky to, they have plenty of friends, even if they'd choose each other over the world on any given day

society as a whole wasn't kind to them, would never be kind to them, they knew as much, but they weren't alone

sapphic couples to go on double dates with as a cover (though Bucky goes out of his way to find more women to date as a cover, lest people ask too many questions)

underground bars to meet at, in the "bad" parts of town, to drink and kiss and be a normal couple for once

meet artists of all flavours, punks (our modern definition, relative to the time), go to protests and rallies for women's rights and workers' rights

Bucky meets other jewish queer folks, too, to his delight

they run from cops more than once

lose more than one friend in that time too, who got found out and sent to "conversion therapy" at best, but more than once was found beaten to a pulp in the street

Sarah passes away and Steve is distraught, but he's not alone in mourning, her funeral has so so many of the people she'd helped in her life, and there's some solace in that, despite feeling more alone than ever

Bucky moves in with him and they get those few happy years with a lot of the same they'd done since becoming a couple, before the war comes

not only is Steve upset he can't join the war effort, he's now seeing his friends joining, getting drafted, or denied for the same reasons he is. queer women join en mass and he knows he'd find his people there too, but they just won't let him

then Bucky gets drafted and TFA plays (mostly) as we know it

their friends freak the fuck out when Steve's suddenly gone, then shows up as "Captain America"

some of the chorus girls pick up on Steve being queer, and suddenly the whole group feels a lot more comfortable around him, and he actually ends up enjoying their company a lot

the Howlies don't care, Howard doesn't care, Peggy is a Nazi so her view doesn't matter, no one really does, and they get to be pretty open about their relationship, with everyone covering for them

Bucky falls

the Barnes family gets a letter on what happened to Bucky, from Steve, and suddenly they know that they'll lose both their sons/brothers in that war, because there's no Steve without Bucky and no Bucky without Steve

they've always known it would end like that, but just like Steve, they'd never expected Bucky to be the one to die first

Steve puts the plane down

When he's confirmed alive in the 21st century, not only do the families of the Howlies reach out to him, who'd spread far by then

not only the Barnes family, Bucky's niblings and, hell, grand niblings (who all also insist on calling Steve their uncle, because that's who he is to them, and Steve cries at that)

but also all the children and grandchildren of the community he and Bucky had been part of

that had seen so much loss, he gets told, in the 80s and 90s, and before that, but still stands strong as ever and he's welcomed back with open arms

because those people, too, were his family

he's also told how after his death, some asshole wanted to discredit him for being queer, and all the people he'd ever known jumped to help him

his and Bucky's relationship was their families' best kept secret

that loss still weighs heavy on him, so he doesn't have the energy for pride, but there's something about queer rights having advanced enough that people like him can get married, that fills him with both overwhelming joy and longing

then Bucky is alive, and after everything is said and done, they come out to the world and get married, for real, not the fake wedding their community had thrown for them, or the one the Howlies did

and the rest is history

[nothorses]

Hi, I'm new on Tumblr. I've been doing a ton of research on TERFs and TIRFs and white feminism, and a lot of people say that the problems with all of these movements at least partially stem from the fact that they all are based off the framework of radical feminism. I'm having trouble understanding the connection, and you seem pretty knowledgeable about this sort of stuff. Could you explain the flaws in radical feminism that cause the problems in these movements?

Sorry this has sat for so long!

"Radical feminism" originates in the second wave of feminism: the first-wave/liberal feminist belief was that patriarchy is a legal issue that can be solved through changes in law. The second wave/radical feminist belief is that patriarchy stems from individually-held biases and large-scale cultural misogyny, and requires a fundamental cultural shift in order to solve. Which is an important step forward in feminist thought! Subsequent waves of feminism included and built on those ideas.

The core of the issue with radical feminism is that it is still very much holds that the oppression of women is the first or most fundamental form of oppression, and everything else is built on top of that. Even when radical feminists do pay lipservice to other forms of oppression, ultimately those things just can't be as important; and even when this belief isn't explicit or conscious for a particular individual, the implication is present in all of the other radical feminist beliefs that have come from that core idea.

So, if women's oppression is the root of all oppression, why focus on other kinds of oppression? Why focus on racism, ableism, classism, religious persecution, or any other form of oppression? Surely, those problems will be resolved when we dismantle patriarchy.

If misogyny lies at the center of it all, well, it follows that other forms of oppression also stem directly from misogyny- or are, literally, just misogyny. For example, they tend to believe that lesbophobia exists entirely because lesbians aren't available to men, and homophobia exists entirely because men are acting like women; biphobia is just a combination of those two things, and therefore doesn't actually exist as a unique phenomenon.

It also follows that the greatest privilege that one can hold is being a man. Black men cannot be uniquely oppressed, because male privilege is the ultimate and most fundamental privilege there is- and the same goes for other men of color, disabled men, gay men, etc. Radical feminists are generally uncomfortable with the idea that white women can oppress men of color at all, or they dismiss that possibility outright.

Bioessentialism and gender essential are foundationally important to radical feminism for this reason: they need to know how to categorize you. Are you a man (oppressor), or a woman (oppressed)? Or, if you don't like that language: Are you woman-aligned or man-aligned? Are you feminine or masculine? Woman and/or femme, or other? Man or non-man? AMAB or AFAB? Are you TME or TMA?

Whether they define "woman" and "man" by some oversimplified version of "biological sex" (think TERFs); by a more lenient, but still oversimplified version of gender identity; or whether they redraw the lines slightly to create a new gender binary, the core idea is the same: women are one way, men are another, and men always oppress women.

This gender essentialism is also why radfems tend to cling so hard to ideas that very obviously strip women of their agency. Misogyny is viewed as so fundamental to the shaping of every single person and their every decision that radfems often believe that a woman cannot truly consent to certain kinds of sex or sex-related work. If it is in service of a man in any way, it must be motivated by patriarchy and misogyny, and it therefore cannot be genuinely consensual. (Nevermind the fact that this work is also often in service of the woman in question, performed for other women, performed by men for women, or performed by men for other men... etc.)

The original shift from first- to second-wave feminism was a good one, and radical feminism contains some really solid feminist ideas. There are also a lot of other branches of feminism, most of which share the exact same good ideas & build on them in far better, more intersectional and inclusive ways. People don't see "radfem" as a red flag because they believe liberal feminism is the way to go-- they avoid it because the reasons for identifying as a radfem in the present day are generally limited to the aspects of radical feminism that virtually every other feminist movement has long since left behind.

(This is also by no means comprehensive, and while I've spent time digging around in this, I'm very much not an expert in gender theory as an academic field. This is just my understanding!)

[ancientpersacom]

I think Nyx's issue as a parent isn't that she's a bad mum or anything, it's that she doesn't know how to raise kids with higher support needs. And it's partly not her fault since she has so many kids to keep up with she can't keep an eye on all of them at the same time, but after that many kids she should have at least realised the same techniques won't work on all of them.

Hypnos needs people, weather it be his twin, older siblings or a partner. Ideally, his mother. He needs extra support. Someone to nudge him awake, encourage him, help him stay focused and stick up for him. He's higher support needs than his twin is. And when they were younger, Thanatos would have been the one supporting him since they were together 24/7 and uniquely bonded as twins. But he grew up to have a job that involves being away for long periods. And because all her other kids grew up to be independent, she expects Hypnos to as well, not realising he needs more support than others.

Eris, literally in her nature of being strife incarnate, needs someone to both understand her nature and reel her in when she goes too far. And because all her other siblings grew up to be well behaved and successful, Nyx has no idea how to handle someone so rowdy. She needs to be both understood, allowed to revel in her nature when strife is needed AND be told when she's going too far and to tone it down so she doesn't accidentally sabotage all her relationships. Ideally, that's a parents job.

So many of her kids turned out well behaved, successful and overall, good at their jobs over their domains, she has no idea what to do when one of those kids has different needs. That's what her issue as a parent is. She doesn't NOT love her kids, she clearly adores them. And she isn't a bad mother overall, she raised plenty of them into polite, sucessful, powerful gods. She just wasn't prepared for kids with higher support needs and has no idea how to handle that.

And it happens a lot, unfortunately. Parents will have one or more kids with no mental/physical health issues and then one with higher support needs and not know what to do. I'm one of those kids, I need more support, but I don't get it because one parent doesn't even believe I'm disabled and the other while DOES understand it, can't really wrap their head around just how much extra support I need. Just because I can walk, talk and see doesn't mean I'm 100% ok.

Just because Hypnos can use his powers, talk, float, walk, understand speech etc doesn't men he's not in need of extra support. Just because Eris can fly, use her powers, walk, talk etc, doesn't mean she doesn't need extra support.

[genderqueerdykes]

I feel like the transandrophobia discourse, and, correct me if I'm wrong - is really dumb because it boils down to

"Trans men get mistreated in unique and notable ways" - general agreeance

"we came up with a term for it." Everyone foams at the mouth

Are people really that caught in the "men cannot be mistreated as a class" brainpoison?

yep, they are, thanks for taking the time to send this! you summed it up perfectly! i've been wanting to talk about this so thanks for giving me a great ask to follow up on for that!

it's really racist because idk how to tell people that being a black man, cis or trans, and being outside can get you killed in the USA if you're doing something cops find "suspicious" just because you're black and a man. black men are still viewed as violent and dangerous. black men still struggle to find community resources. black men still struggle in the work place due to systemic racism. black men are not valued anywhere near the same as much as white men are.

this goes for all men of color. being a man of color in the US is terrible. it's not a cake walk for men of color, even if they're mixed. they face constant oppression, every day of their lives, and it's not a good idea to dismiss that just because you think being queer is the only way to be oppressed in society. but it's very racist to ignore that cishet men of color suffer in the USA and other places white people have colonized.

disabled men are also oppressed. disabled men lose tons of privilege because man = workhorse to most people. we make men they think they have to do all the work forever for everyone around them and not complain. if they start experiencing chronic pain or fatigue, mental health symptoms, or anything that prevents them from working, they are treated like absolute garbage on top of being miserable from their illnesses. men can be neurodivergent. men can be disabled for life. men get sick, too, and it impacts how society views them greatly.

there's a lot of ways that men can be oppressed. ignoring it for the sake of a sassy snapback isn't cool. it's racist and ableist as hell and it's not worth throwing those people under the bus for. please care about men of color. please care about disabled and neurodivergent and chronically ill men. there are way more things that can hold a man back aside from just their assigned gender at birth. society is actually very cruel to a lot of men.

[animeyanderelover]

Request: For my second request I would like for Haruhi (OHSHC), Misa (Death Note), Asa (Chainsaw Man), Uruaka (MHA), Kiyoko and Hinata (Haikyu), Rin and Bachira (Blue Lock), Illumi and Pokkle (HXH) where their darling is confessing to the yandere that they feel the same as them and return their feelings for them, but says they can't be together because they are both the same gender? and tells the yanderes “I wish you were a boy/girl?”

Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional behavior, manipulation, blackmailing, abduction, isolation, murder, female reader with female character, male reader with male character

Tags: @jamayah @chxxz @leveyani @hyakki-yosai @shenryu-sama @maggiequinn59 @killuagirly

I wish you were a boy/girl

Illumi Zoldyck

🤎​All you receive from Illumi after you have told him that the two of you can't be together because he is a man is that long and blank stare accompanied with the wonderful awkward silence that disables you to speak up. Frankly spoken, Illumi doesn't care too much about the fact that he has fallen in love with another man. No, he is quite confused instead as he doesn't understand why you instead reject him despite feeling the same. The way he tilts his head would be almost cute if his eyes wouldn't pierce your very soul at the moment. When he eventually asks you if you could explain it to him all whilst he finally blinks threateningly slow the tension in the air is so thick that you could cut it with a knife. No matter how you explain it to him though, your words hold no weight in his mind. The only thing that matters to him is the fact that you reciprocate his emotions and if someone within your surroundings stops the two of you, he will kill them. It's as simple as that. Once you are within the walls of the Zoldyck mansion Illumi will make sure that no one questions the two of you. As long as he fucks someone and has some heirs he is free to love whoever he wants after all.

Pokkle

🏹​Pokkle goes through the five stages of grief only that he never arrives at the stage of acceptance. He's in denial at the beginning because within all of his infatuation and all the insecurities somehow he never once considered that maybe you wouldn't feel attracted to him simply because he is of the same sex as you are. After the denial follows immediately the depression as he retreats from your sight. By no means is he avoiding you though, still stalking behind you though with a lot more grief within his heart. It's very likely that he is soon going to reach a breaking point though. You see, Pokkle is very much dependent on attention and love from his darling which will ultimately lead his mind to be able to only repeat one thing. That you still love him. Love conquers anything after all so why would you let yourself be stopped just because he is biologically a man? As soon as he starts drifting into that thought process it is over for you as that is the moment Pokkle will turn densely delusional out of desperation. An abduction will follow soon after as Pokkle is convinced that you just need to realise that it doesn't matter that the two of you are both men as he will prove to you that he is better than a woman.

Amane Misa

💄​Whatever it is that you say to her it all becomes irrelevant in her mind the moment you make the mistake of confessing to her that you feel the same as she does. Misa immediately latches on to those words as they are the only words she hears. Misa is awfully possessive of her darling and delusional to top it all which is a dangerous combination. The first thing that she does as soon as you have ended your speech is just give you a long and giddy kiss as she decides to ignore whatever it was you spoke after admitting to her that you love her too. Why, you may ask? Because it doesn't matter to her. You return her feelings and that is all that she really needs to hear and know. Still, it is not like she is completely oblivious as you notice that she is so much clingier and affectionate whenever the two of you are around other men. Her facade is still all cute smiles but there is that dangerous look in her eyes. Jealousy is as natural as breathing for Misa and if she believes that someone is threatening your relationship, she will write his name down in her Death Note. So even if you try to get together with a man, she will ensure that he is going to drop dead in the most gruesome way possible.

Uraraka Ochaco

🎈​Ochaco considered the two of you to be a wonderful match. You have known each other for so long after all. In her mind there has never been a question about who she would end up with later on in her life but she realises that she has been too optimistic when you tell her that you cannot see yourself with her because she is also a girl. She swallows it all down though and only gives you a weak smile, assuring you that it's alright. Obviously the relationship takes a turn for the worse between the two of you and she can't accept that. Something has to be done or else she is going to lose you completely. Obviously she will feel guilty the moment she starts subtly sabotaging and manipulating you but whenever she meets a guy you like, she is hard-wired to notice everything about him that you wouldn't like later on because she knows you too well. Small mistakes like inviting you to food that you don't like are already enough to have her doubt that you will be happy with him. She starts pointing out everything about appearance or personality on a guy that she knows you don't like and always speaks up when he does something you don't like to show you that she knows you best after all.

Hinata Shoyo

☀️​Being heavily delusional by nature, someone like Hinata is going to be difficult to handle when it comes to any type of rejection in general. All of it is made much worse though when you foolishly confess to feeling the same way as he does though. Even as you tell him that the two of you can't be together and even if his heart is hurting, Hinata doesn't feel any despair. How could he after all? If the love between the two of you is mutual after all then there is nothing he has to be worried about. That settles it in Shoyo's mind. The two of you are a couple and the very next morning he is totally going to act his part of it. He's elated, a bright grin on his face as he tells all his friends that you reciprocate his feelings. He's affectionate, grabs your hands and hugs you from behind. Rumors quickly spread which leave you no choice but to confront him, absolutely flabbergasted and in shock from what he has done. If you are going to get angry with him be prepared for the waterworks though as Hinata will just yell back that you told him that you loved him. Why does sex even matter then when the both of you feel the same? You... you wouldn't drop him only to be together with a girl after all, would you?

Shimizu Kiyoko

🖤​Kiyoko keeps a stoic expression when you admit to her your inner conflict before just giving you a curt nod and leaving. She is not someone who openly reveals her affection for you as she is for starters aware that her feelings aren't exactly your typical highschool romance and additionally she prefers observation as she would never confess mindlessly only to get her feelings hurt. In that moment she is glad that she has never revealed just how much you mean to her as otherwise things between the two of you would have been much more awkward. However, she is not completely hurt as the fact remains that you still love her too. That is something that she can work with. There is after all a path that can be taken in this situation and all she has to do is build it now. Perhaps it is time to step out of her shell and show you just how much she cares about you and how well she knows you. She will swiftly and bluntly point out everything at fault within a guy when you introduce him to her the moment she notices that he says or does something you are uncomfortable with all whilst she herself inserts herself more into your life, providing the support and assistance that you need in that moment.

Fujioka Haruhi

👑​Haruhi is to her defence not going to be your biggest worry that you have in the beginning. I would consider Tamaki to be the bigger menace at first when he finds out that Haruhi has been dumped by you because she is a girl. He's extremely protective of her and is most likely going to tell you multiple sob stories in the hope that you may reconsider your words. To Haruhi herself gender has never really mattered that much as she doesn't think that it should restrict someone within society, a very open-minded opinion that you don't seem to share. To her it has never mattered that you are a girl but it matters to you and a part of her understands where those prejudices may come from. It is not within Haruhi's assets to beat around the bush though, she is going to be very straightforward and ask you soon for a clearer reason for why exactly you can't be together with her. If you wouldn't be into girls it would be one thing but since you have confessed to her that you return her love she knows that this isn't the case which is why she is unwilling to give up. She's still friendly and welcoming but Haruhi is very stubborn and the topic will come up in conversations since she doesn't see the need to lie.

Mikata Asa

▪️​Asa isn't in general known as someone who deals with failure or anything that doesn't go her way very well so this is initially not going to end up any better. The moment you tell her that you can't be together with you her initial reaction is to simply insult you and everyone she knows you have a friendly relationship with. All of her pain is buried deep within as she exposes her mean-spirited side before she walks away with her chin held high. Her meltdown only happens once she is all alone and has no one to project her pain on anymore, spiralling down into her hole of insecurity and self-hatred. She wants to prove herself as worthy, she wants you to choose her but she lacks any comprehension of social skills to do so. However, if there is one thing that she latches on to it is the fact that you admitted that you still love her even though you can't be with her. That has to mean something, doesn't it? It's those words she clings to, it's those words that push her to go on with a constant mixture of anger, jealousy and hope within her. She stalks you everywhere you go, she insults every man that gets too close with you all whilst she tries in a severely wrong attempt to show you her worth.

Bachira Meguru

💛​I'll just be honest and say right away that he is not going to care about what you have to say. Bachira gladly allows his delusional streak to solve all problems for him which allows for such an unmatched level of optimism which you would better not break. You just have to make it worse by admitting to him your own feelings which only solidifies everything within Bachira's thoughts as his actions from that day on are justified. You love him so there should be no problem at all for any of his actions after all. If you try to avoid him the best of luck because this guy is going to pop up everywhere where you are. Not to mention the lovely surprise visits that he likes to do, appearing unannounced in front of your door and asking to be let in with a grin on his face. He's so handsy with you, it is almost maddening. Meguru is constantly touching you somehow. He jumps on your back from behind, he tugs at your sleeves when he wants attention, he grabs your hand in his and drags you away from someone that he finds annoying. You're not going to be able to shake him off as Meguru is the human definition of a leech who won't let go. His behavior is very risky to be honest.

Itoshi Rin

🩵​Differently from Bachira Rin is much more subtle with everything though perhaps that is going to make him more dangerous than disturbing. He leaves you alone after your rejection but you would misjudge the situation severely if you were to believe that he is trying to accept everything. It's actually the complete opposite as Rin tries to tame his own demons and think of a way to get you back to his side. He can't let things slip through his hands, he can't let every single person leave him in the dust just because he isn't enough, isn't what others want him to be. It's that desperation that drives him quite far in any attempt to assure that you don't get any saying. What I'm trying to say is that after having watched the second season and having seen his flow that I believe Rin to get very destructive when he snaps which then puts everyone around you at a risk because his sole drive then is to destroy everyone who stands in his way. He starts blackmailing all sorts of people and he won't even have enough care left to spare your closed ones and you yourself get a very good slice of this ugly side of his that contrasts his normal stoic behavior on every single level.

[turtle-paced]

what sort of ableism do you think willas tyrell faced? I see people reference ableism but the only one I could point out is cersei behind his back to Tywin. But the society even Banner man Randal Tarly are extremely ableist. What sort of ableism do you think he’s faced or had to witness?

There's attitudes:

Cersei laughed. "The butterfly knight who lost his arm on the Blackwater? What good is half a man?" Cersei VI, AFFC

It's also worth noting how this is tied into the performance of masculinity for Westerosi men. Tyrion is likewise called "Halfman". A man who isn't able-bodied is less of a person and less of a man, specifically. We've got enough male PoVs thinking on this that we can be absolutely sure that 1) the people of Westeros are ableist as fuck and 2) this is a place where the patriarchy very much hurts men.

And then there's physical barriers. To go with a Tyrion example:

The bride's cloak he held was huge and heavy, crimson velvet richly worked with lions and bordered with gold satin and rubies. No one had thought to bring a stool, however, and Tyrion stood a foot and a half shorter than his bride. Sansa III, ASoS

This is Tyrion's wedding, and nobody thought about whether Tyrion, the groom, was physically capable of going through the expected motions when they arranged the ceremony. We see similar with Bran, when Tyrion's the first person to say "hey, there's a way to help Bran travel and participate in outdoor recreation instead of sitting on the sidelines in perpetuity!" when he brings the modified saddle designs to Winterfell. Unlike with Tyrion's situation (and likely closer to Willas' situation), Bran's family and caretakers actually give a damn about Bran - and they still hadn't got their heads fully around the fact that with effort and creativity, Bran could participate in more ways than he had been.

This ultimately goes back to attitudes as well. Even caring, loving people just assume that disability means "can't do that, end of story" instead of "needs help to do that" or "could do that if we do this". If you're not already familiar, check out the social model of disability.

Not only do the physical structures, the rituals, and the activities of Westerosi nobility just assume able bodies, it's very rare for people to proactively think about how someone with a disability can still engage. Willas would be subject to those attitudes and those physical barriers same as Tyrion, same as Jaime, same as Bran.

[yukiqueer]

— yukiqueer.

yukiqueer is a blankqueer label that is separate from radqueer, but shares many similar beliefs. yukiqueer focuses on taking complex things by a case-by-case basis, and using intelligence to deduce one’s own support or disdain.

the emoji codes for yukiqueer are 🌨️🌈 / ❄️🌈 / ☃️🌈. it can also be written as snowqueer, ゆきqueer, or 雪queer.

specific beliefs are under the cut.

yukiqueer is in favor of:

— shipping and fiction. all works between fictional characters have a right to exist. an individual who is yukiqueer does not need to identify with the proship label to have this belief. — media literacy & critical thinking. analyze how media treats its taboo topics, and use your intelligence to know whether or not this is trying to change your views. know propaganda when you come across it. — kink, fetish, and other sexual fantasies. as long as all involved parties can and are consenting, any sexual fantasy can be brought to life. — “contradictory” labels. afab transfems, lesboys and gaybians, and all other labels that people say don’t work together should be allowed. — personal definition of labels. only you can define what being bisexual, or pansexual, or anything else is in terms of your own identity. — trans-ID for almost all facets of life. your physical body is just a vessel, and the way you identify is more important than that. — consent for all relationships. you choose what is best for you. — landback for indigenous peoples. indigenous people have a right to ownership of their land, but not to kick all non-natives off of it. — obsessive, grooming, or otherwise abusive relationships with consent from both parties. as long as all involved people have given the okay, what others do in their relationship is up to them and them alone to decide. — selfshipping. this applies to all sharing stances as well — a yumeshipping relationship is as valid as a relationship between non-fictional people, as long as the yumeshipper wants it to be so. — women’s rights. women, both trans and cis, have the right to equality with men. — rights for people of color. racism is backwards and narrow-minded, and has no place in an intelligent society. — full body autonomy. with your own body, you are in full control. abortions, tattoos, hormone therapy, self-harm — all are allowed, and not stigmatized or villainized. — fat and disabled liberation. all people with larger bodies or witn disabilities deserve proper access to the same opportunities and treatment as their thin and/or able-bodied counterparts. — gender non-conformity. no person has to conform to a gender role unless they choose to. a self-identified man, regardless of cis or trans standing, can dress feminine, and the same goes for women and non-binary people.

— otherkin/alterhumanity/IRL/delusional attachment. only we are allowed to choose how we identify, and if the human body you have does not fit you, perhaps another form is better. — romanticization of stigmatized things. you can romanticize or glorify your trauma, or your “bad” habits, or other villainized/taboo things. — proper tags/warnings on all public content. some may not be okay with the same things as you, and it’s important to properly warn people of what your public content contains so those who aren’t okay with it can avoid the upset, and those who are interested can more effectively seek out such content. — informed self-diagnosis. getting a “proper” diagnosis can be extremely difficult, and is out of reach for many. the medical system as it is now is extremely bigoted, and pursuit of diagnosis can be far too expensive even for those with more privilege. as such, intelligent people can recognize and treat a self-diagnosis backed up by information and knowledge as validly as they would an official one. — consanguineous relationships. people who are related can be in a relationship as long as both are consenting and they are informed on the possible risks of having children with one another (with the second rule not applying to couples/polycules unable to have children for whatever reason, or those who are not related by blood but are adopted/transfamily/et cetera). — sex work. sex workers deserve respect and support for what they do, including those who post NSFW content online as their income. inversely, those who pay for sex work should not be shunned either, as long as the relationship between worker and client is not harmful. — medically unrecognized disorders/syndromes. the medical world is not the end-all be-all of neurological knowledge, and if one has found a medically unrecognized term that fits the symptoms they live with, the term is just as valid as any medically recognized one. — all religious beliefs*. *provided these beliefs do not encroach on the rights of others not following said religion. all religions and faiths have a right to exist. an intelligent person can hate a specific religion for any reason, provided their hatred does not manifest publicly and is not used as a shield to treat members of that religion poorly. — sexual education for all ages. all people, regardless of age, should be able to know their body and to know only they have the rights to it. with this in mind, youth should receive sex ed with depth relative to their age — meaning that, for example, high schoolers would receive more in-depth sexual education than middle schoolers.

yukiqueer has a neutral stance on:

— the radqueer label and community. yukiqueer is not inherently supportive of or opposed to those who are radqueer, and in intelligent society it is most sensible to take each individual on a case-by-cade basis. individuals who are yukiqueer may choose to support radqueer, or may be against it. — real person fiction/selfshipping with real people/NSFW fiction of real people. this goes beyond the limits of fictional characters, and as such, is a highly debated one. therefore, individuals who are yukiqueer may choose their own comfort with this concept, as long as they do not try to force their beliefs on others. — anti- and pro-contact stances. individuals who are yukiqueer can choose whether or not they support either of these staunch beliefs in favor of or against contact for the “big 3” paraphilias. — the reclaiming of slurs. yukiqueer individuals can decide if they want to use and reclaim slurs.

yukiqueer has a complex stance on:

— romantic/sexual contact between adults and minors. the relationship is okay if: - it follows romeo and juliet laws (meaning the age gap is 3 or fewer years between parties) - it is a relationship between headmates - both are chronological adults and one is transage OtY - both are chronological minors (following romeo & juliet laws) and one is transage YtO — romantic/sexual contact between humans and animals. the relationship is okay if: - it is a relationship between headmates - both are human and one is transspecies/otherkin/therian — romantic/sexual contact between living beings and corpses. the relationship is okay if: - it is a relationship between headmates - the corpse gave consent prior to death - both are living and one is transdead/transcorpse/anything in that vein.

yukiqueer is opposed to:

— harassment of any kind. if an individual holds beliefs you do not share, an intelligent individual should choose to either ask open-minded, polite questions about the other person’s beliefs, or simply curate their space and remove themselves from contact with the other person. it is never okay to harass someone. — bigotry in any form. racism, queerphobia, sexism, and anything else have no place in an intelligent society. — the creation, distribution, or possession of CSEM/CSAM. no child should be exploited for sexual content. — nazism of any kind, including holocaust denial or inversion. the holocaust was a genocide specifically targeted towards jewish people. while other groups such as queer and romani people were also targeted, one must know that nazis are against jewish people as their main point. a jewish person cannot be a nazi. — misogyny and transmisogyny. women are not inherently lesser than men in any way, and trans women are women. trans women are not a “threat” to cis women. — misandry and transmisandry. men are not inherently lesser than women in any way, and trans men are men. men are not all abusers, and trans men are not “basically women” nor are they “transitioning into privilege.” — transhateful labels, such as transnazi or transbigot. even with no intent to transition, using the transid label in terms of saying you identify with a crueler mindset does not fit with the beliefs of yukiqueer. if you are transbigot or transnazi, you will be treated like a bigot or a nazi and that is not welcome here. — forced recovery. this falls under violation of bodily autonomy — only you can decide if you want to recover from an eating disorder, or an addiction, or anything similar. forcing someone else to recover does not fit the beliefs of yukiqueer. — intersex genital mutilation and forced hrt for intersex individuals. this is a traumatizing violation of bodily autonomy and has no place in intelligent society. no intersex person should be forced to try to appear perisex.

yukiqueer was created for its coiner as it did not agree with all of the beliefs of radqueer, and it wanted to make a label focused on intelligence, open-mindedness, and bodily freedom.

anyone who shares these beliefs can identify with yukiqueer. if you have questions or would like to share your experience with this label or any other blankqueer label, the coiner’s inbox is open.

[nekropsii]

okay i want to hear your opinion on this. out of all the alpha trolls, which one do you think sucks the Worst and which one do you think sucks the least. genuinely curious

Difficult and Vague Question. Could be answered in a whole number of ways. Part of the difficulty in finding an angle in it is that Morality is highly subjective, and also some of the shit the Alpha Trolls get up to is so reprehensible it's astounding. I'm choosing a combined angle of "Worst/Least Difficult to Survive a Conversation with", and "Worst/Least Sucks Traits + Actions". This is because, for the most part, the male Alpha Trolls are generally intended to be Spineless Intolerable Misogynistic Morally Bankrupt Sex Offenders, and the female Alpha Trolls are, for the most part, Chilling.

If someone has an answer for the first question that isn't "Cronus", and that answer doesn't start with "Aside from Cronus", Stop Listening To Them. That's the point of his character. He's a Serial Child Predator, an unrepentant Sex Offender, and a Turbo-Bigot who wants to kill people for being Minorities, he's the correct answer. As far as an answer that excludes Cronus goes, the answer necessarily has to be one of the men, sans Mituna... But really, it depends on what crimes you personally can stand less that day, or which kind of guy you specifically have more trauma about. Lol. Cronus, Rufioh, Kankri, Horuss, and Kurloz are all insanely evil men in different ways. Make them coworkers at a shitty failing pub, and you'll have a sitcom for the ages.

The people who suck the least are the Women without contest, minus Meenah, and nuance for Damara.

Last bit there is probably somewhat Controversial, but, like. Damara's perfectly nice if you're not an Alpha Troll, but deservedly an utter bastard hellion if she is with them. I don't approve of her methods, but I do approve of her torturing them. We see her interact with people who are not the Alpha Trolls, and she's plenty nice to them. Makes sense, considering she was mentally broken into acting like that by other members of her team repeatedly gaslighting and victimizing her for years, rather than her just having always been Like That. Meenah is impulsive to the point of crimes happening regularly and seemingly cannot stop herself from pursuing children. Meenah's the person your Intrusive Thoughts convince you you would be if you didn't have a crippling Anxiety Disorder to "keep you in check". She's the main female exception to the rule of "The Women are Chilling and the Men are Insane Criminal Perverts". Diversity Win..?

Porrim's just a Feminist and is pretty normal, though her Social Position shows. She tends to be the default pick for "Most Normal", but since she's a woman written by Hussie, she still has some sucks traits. Latula's got issues managing her combined Mental Health problems and her insane case of Internalized Misogyny, both of which Porrim seems to be trying to help her out with. Porrim also seems to be succeeding at helping her. Good for them! Aranea might've done all of that, but she was a preventable disaster. I don't think any of that would've happened if people just listened to her for once. She had to pay her own best friend to listen to her, and even then she didn't do it. Meulin is a bit sucks, but a lot of that has to do with her main Character Traits being "Annoying Fangirl" and "Fujoshi". Even with those in mind, these aren't crimes, especially not ones of the same caliber as Cronus', and she's really funny about both things anyway. Also, she's quite passionate about Disability, particularly Deafness. As a Hearing Disabled person myself, I like this about her, so she can do anything.

My personal ranking is... Cronus is the Worst both of the men and in general, Meenah's the worst of the Women. Porrim, Meulin, and Latula are the least sucks women and likely the least sucks people in the whole cast, and Mituna is the least sucks man.

[yellowballoondogs]

Giving the x-men disabilities so they can suffer like me

I just think it’s cool how much people can relate to the x-men in marginalized groups no matter the group. Just like how they’re all gay, POC, religious minorities, etc.

Cyclops- Scott Summers

C’mon this is the most autistic man to ever autism

He’s got model plane sets and shit around his otherwise empty and perfectly cleaned room with the sheet corners tucked in and everything

He stopped stimming because of O’Diamonds and Sinisters abuse but started again when he got more comfortable with the o5 team. He definitely does flappy hands

He probably hyper fixated on an obscure engineering subject

photophobia- light sensitivity

Idk if it’s cannon or not but it would make sense with his brain damage and all (plus I have it and I’m projecting) it’s also an autism symptom so double whammy- his glasses will help

Migrainous stroke- basically stroke with migraines. It ties into brain damage and photophobia with migraines which would make so much sense. Frequent strokes too? Fuck yeah let’s highlight how his childhood trauma and overwhelming power effect him- how mutant powers aren’t always good.

He should have really shitty vision- canonically colorblind- wears glasses all the time so low light, his eyes basically fucking glow. This man cannot see for shit

“cut the red wire cyclops!” “They’re all red!”

Storm- Ororo Monroe

She’s canonically claustrophobic but it’s really only used as a once in awhile plot device

I think it should tie into anxiety a lot more

Ororo is the kind of person who uses a planner to manage every aspect of her day so she’s never caught of guard

She’s got only one timer set up to take her meds instead of 10 like the rest of us (she’s simply better)

She would have actual panic attacks that don’t end the second she’s out of a confined space. Full run-

For her a panic attack would cause a lot of derealization. She doesn’t feel like she’s in her body, she feels out of control, like she can’t breathe, dizzy, both hot and cold at the same time.

Nightcrawler-Kurt Wagner

syndactyly- fusion of fingers or toes. This is basically cannon. He’s got 2 big fingers and toes so like no explanation really needed. He’s got it even if it’s for different reasons.

This greatly effects his ability to do certain things- our boy can’t use a controller can he? How’s he meant to play Mario cart with the rest of the team ):

Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome- bendy bones and stretchy skin that causes lots of joint pain

He canonical has bendy bones so like this is also half canon. Plus I’m giving my blorbo chronic pain to project.

Pretty sure there’s a Spider-Man with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome too so that’s very slay.

Rouge- Anne-Marie

Hear me out- HPV It’s the whole- “I can’t touch anyone” thing

She was born with it

It causes a lot of pain for her but she hides it around people she’s not comfortable with (so really just unmasking in front of remy and her family)

Also stds just need to be a lot more normalized. And her having to be so weird about people with it fits so much with the whole “ew mutants” thing

Xavier

Yeah yeah he’s a paraplegic

They should be better about it though. No more of this curing him so often he’s like the one famous character wheelchair bound people get

Stop making him so weak, he runs a school to learn how to kick ass, man can probably box, who needs legs. They always just make him useless once someone kicks over his chair or something

Chronic migraines again

Listen hearing all those thoughts all the time can’t be all sunshine’s and rainbows. Make him suffer (this goes for all telepaths)

Gambit- Remy Lebeau

He canonically has brain damage (via lebeatomy) (haha get it)

He’s getting hit with migraines too. Making all these losers suffer

He probably also has very bad vision because of his eyes- probably not very good with light just like cyclops (likely worse)

I’m going to give him the worlds worst period cramps via dysmenorrhea. Yeah he’s trans to me I’m a romy t4t Reuther

Rapid fire listings let’s go!

Jubilee canonically has Dyscalculia- like dyslexia for numbers

Wolverine canonically has memory issues and ptsd

Magneto canonically has ptsd

Legion canonically has multiple personality disorder or DID- dissociative identity disorder. It’s not always portrayed the best but rep is rep

Angel canonically has hollow bones- I’m gonna gc him with osteoporosis

Headcanoning Madelyn Pryor with post partum depression

Scarlet witch gets head cannoned half of all the mental disorders- depression, psychosis, ptsd, and anything you wanna give her. Girl needs a staff of therapists, psychologists, and a cocktail of pills

Quicksilver gets headcannoned with ADHD. Boring I know but I’ve got it and it fits him so projection time

Let marrow have ptsd. Girl witnessed a genocide of her people and her moms death as a child. Why do they skim over that? Girl is suffering

Pyro canonically had the legacy virus which was like a big euphemism for AIDs so he gets that. Plus he also gets hit with the autism beam

Toad is autistic. No further questions

Jean grey gets the psychic migraines but I’m also giving her autism cause her relationship with Scott is nowhere near neurotypical. The biggest disability marvel gave her was liking wolverine though. He canonically smells like shit and is an asshole. I love him.

Kitty pryde gets type 1 diabetes- I cannot explain why it fits her it just does

Cable gets lupus cause he canonically had a fantasy space tech autoimmune disease so let’s just make it more realistic

Daken gets lactose intolerance (he’s fine because he doesn’t really actually eat dairy)

Iceman gets lactose intolerance (he’s not fine because he loves all things dairy)

Dust gets celiac disease

[p0mipaws]

i like your silco/viktor posts, any hcs for those two? sfw or nsfw, dealers choice

Yeah! Here some HC I have for them (+ Vander)! Sorry most of them pretty OOC haha

- Viktor and Silco sharing their collection of lingeries together bc they are same size

- both Silco and Viktor have sweet tooth and Silco kinda annoyed with how fast his snack pantry get empty when Viktor first move in.

- Silco who lets Viktor doms him bc he think he can easily flip the situation if needed (also I just love Viktor domming and topping Silco in general bc my baby girl chembaron deserve to be taken care of)

- No matter the universe they are in, Silco is break up with Vander before he meets Viktor lmao

- and no matter the universe in, Silco have higher social status than Viktor. Either Silco more success, older, boss/employee, councelor/university dean (these are just my taste of Vilco. The power dynamic 💕)

- If this is ep7s2 universe or modern au, they meet on student orientation when Silco accompany Powder/Jinx and Ekko (they insisted Silco doesnt need to come, but Silco just cant let go his little girl yet and want to spend more time with her)

- How much Viktor different from Vander (physically and personality) makes Silco feel excited

- Viktor might lacking in fucking-with-his-dick department due to his back and leg, but he is an expert on using his tongue and fingers. And he wont shy away from using toys

- although they like doing rough dom/sub, most of their sex are pretty soft and slow. Like slow making out, grinding their hips together, light touches, etc.

- Silco encourage Viktor to start using various of walking aids (especially wheelchair) after seeing how struggling he is in some day (and viktor being stubborn about it). He also make his house more disable friendly

- Viktor is Jinx's professor at uni and she thinks she will have her way in his class since he is dating her dad. She is wrong. Not only he is more strict with her, she also get lectures at home! On good side, she can bother him any time of the day to ask for inputs on her project

- Silco never married Vander, but he does married Viktor

- Silco tells him his trauma at any chance he gets and Viktor will listen to him closely like its was the first time

- Silco is a little insecure about their age gaps. Meanwhile Viktor scared Silco think he is after his money.

-Viktor likes to trace his fingers on Silco's face scar when they are cuddling

- Silco likes to sleep in silk lingerie meanwhile Viktor likes to sleep in men night gown

- The way Silco treats Viktor is the same way how he treats Vander before *The Drowning* and not only its makes Vander jealous, its also a reminder of what he can have.

- Before Silco meet Viktor, there is a period of time where Vander and Silco break up then get back together and raising the kids after what Vander did. But its just not the same, Silco and Vander arent the same person anymore. Thats why they break up for good after Vi, Claggor, and Mylo move out. Jinx choose to come with Silco and live between houses for some time before she goes to uni

[maybe-boys-do-love]

Finished Last Twilight, and I'm not adding to the ableism discourse, because most things have already been said and with a lot of beautiful nuance that I agree with. But I do want to talk about how that ending arrived because of Aof Noppharnach's consistent symbolic commentary on the experience of living with HIV in much of his work, with an approach that's unique among all queer content. Imma skip Gay OK Bangkok since its not even a metaphor there, but I'll explain my rationale for the others, and we can just appreciate the foundation Gay OK Bangkok lays for us to think about the rest of his stuff.

The motif of life-saving medical intervention comes up in all but one of the works he takes screenwriting credit on. He's Coming To Me: P'Med dies originally because of a lack of medical intervention. 1000 Stars: Tian gets a heart transplant. Moonlight Chicken: this one's more subtle, but the whole series is explicitly established in the context of reopening following the COVID pandemic, and Wen will later say to Jim, "we are survivors." It was this line upon rewatch that made me start considering how thorough this theme is. Survivors of what? The meaning is three-fold: hard lessons in love, COVID, and, for gay men of their age, the HIV epidemic. The hope of medical intervention for Day's condition takes on a secondary meaning, with this trend in mind, even if the mixed disability politics between visual impairment and being HIV positive really fails.

His comparisons are more intricate though. Pills and daily regimens are a consistent motif. Day has his daily eye-drops, Tian his pills (which are presumably immune-suppressants to help accept the transplant but I'm not going to Viki right now and watching every ep to find out so someone feel free to correct me). 'But people take medicine for lots of things,' you say. 'Just because its gay doesn't mean its an HIV metaphor!' You have a fair point! But here's where Aof gets real fun and sneaky. P'Med dies from lack of pills the same year Torfun, whose heart will save Tian's life, is born, 1997. I'm mentioned once before 1997 as important for the class-conscious Aof because of the Asian financial crisis that Thailand set off that year. However, 1997 is also important because its the year HAART, or Highly Active Anti-Retroviral Therapy was first used in Thailand (it had hit the market only one year earlier). HAART, a multi-drug regimen, boosted someone's life-expectancy with HIV up by 15 years, and its side-effects were significantly milder than previous approaches. The medical conditions of P'Med and Torfun's heart point us directly to HAART, and what it could offer.

Now we're moving out of the medical and into the experiential connections because, while Dark Blue Kiss is the only work Aof chose to take credit for screen-writing without incorporating medical references, it is by far the most dense with references to the issue of concealment. Its in the narrative as people closet identities and hide relationships, yes, but its in SO much of the visuals, too, most obviously the Pete & Kao mug hidden inside its coozie. It's easy to see the surface story about gay visibility and the closet, but there's a more specific subtext here about the associated condition that intensified the stigma of being gay and how that impacts your sense of self. Bad Buddy explores this issue less, but even in the BL Bubble, its haunted by the stigma of homophobia--it just shuffles it over onto rivalry so the audience can experience it without reproducing it.

However, the grief and shame of surviving when others haven't haunts Aof's other works much more intensely. Jim and Tian both are hung up on guilt for someone's death that they did not actually cause, continuing to pursue the goals for those that passed rather than their own. Then, there's Thun and P'Med, which is the best allegory for living and dating with HIV, bar none. It goes into the feelings of stigma and the limits of physical intimacy with partners that living with HIV caused, especially prior to Truvada's introduction in 2004. Even then, the show depicts how a HIV negative partner maintains the choice to participate in their own regimens, as Thun's desires for physical intimacy with P'Med manage their relationship and never the other way around.

This sense of required separation and gay identities that are less sex-focused also play into oft-maligned motifs in Aof's work. He's talked explicitly about people's criticisms of the limited physical intimacy in his earlier works that led to the more prominent stuff in Bad Buddy, but I hope given the above context, we can appreciate why physical intimacy is less of a priority than other kinds (and I'd add that 1000 Stars, which got the most sh*t about it, is actually one of the most erotically-charged BLs out there because of it's restraint). Then, you have the finales where characters separate for periods of time, and while I don't see this as explicitly tied to HIV experiences (Aof is literally following the book of romcom beats there, even if everyone whines about it), I can't help but appreciate a tangential connection to loving beyond time and distance that was required for those who lived with or lost loved ones to HIV.

I would've loved to see a version of Last Twilight that didn't absolutely bungle its metaphor, because it had every element to be something great (except, I'm sorry to the fans, lead actors with the necessary queer romantic chemistry). Watching the last episode, when the show seemed to finally rediscover plot and pacing, all the other pieces that had been drowned out by the disability conversation peeked their heads out, and I saw what the show wanted to be. The topics related to living with HIV of stigma, survivor's guilt, and assistive technologies: they were all right there, not just for Day but for everyone, if only they had been given the proper time to marinate to develop more complexity. It's the rare instance of a show where I'll choose to spend time imagining what could have been rather than obsessing over what was or just moving on. Even a misstep from Aof, like this, is overflowing with so many more layers than most series. The failures of Last Twilight, in relationship to his other works, even let you see how much food for thought he's providing.

[missmaymeltsmymind]

You are welcome in this place, but be warned, for dangers lay within...

Well met, friends. You enter the lair of Miss May, hypnotist, writer, and Dominant. I'm the horniest, kinkiest asexual you're ever likely to meet, apart from every other grey-ace I know, I have Extensive Opinions on Many Subjects, there's so many disabilities in this fleshy prison of Mine that it's almost easier to list the ones I don't have, and I am extremely interested in hypnosis for both sexual and non-sexual reasons, on account of the fact that it’s bloody witchcraft. In the (paraphrased) words of Sir Pratchett (GNU): just because you know how it works, doesn’t mean it’s not magic. The fact that it’s unbelievably hot doesn’t hurt, mind.

Age: I'm old enough to remember the idea of online privacy. The only thing you need to know about Me is that I am a legal adult. Fun fact: you can dox someone with their name, age, and hometown really easily. Don't tell the entire goddamned internet your personal information. Lie to corporations, for fuck's sake.

If, for some reason, this irritates you, please answer these questions: what's your name? What about your age? Mh-hm. Noted. And what high school did you go to? In what city or town? Okay, thank you. And, one last one, how many people on the entire planet share that exact same set of answers? Two? Three? None? Yeah. And you've brought this up in casual conversation how many times without thinking about it? On the internet, where literally anyone could find records of it? Protect your damned privacy.

Gender: Good question! Answer in progress. There's definitely more girl in there than I originally thought, but who knows if it's enough to win a majority vote in the pronoun elections. For now, please assume I will respond to most things. She/they is preferred, but I've found that there are specific scenarios in which I respond better to he/him or fae/faer. That said, if you have a new and exciting neopronoun I've never heard of before, please tell Me! I love funky genders. I collect them.

Sexuality: Queer. By specific flags, I'm Asexual (grey), Bisexual Lesbian (women by preference, but if you try to ignore My attraction to men and the Funky Options, I'm swapping your knees with your elbows), Aromantic (maybe?), Transgender (DEFINITELY), Nonbinary, and Polyamorous. Just - just go with Queer. It's so much quicker. I also accept Ace, because 1. It’s definitely the most important individual one, and 2. It makes Me sound like a fighter/mech pilot. Which is very cool. (But not a LAM pilot. Those things suck.)

Asks: Send them! I accept your queries and questions with relish! But be warned, pretty thing, if you approach My lair looking all delicious and vulnerable, I may decide to have a bite...

DMs: I will respond to DMs as soon as I'm able, but generally, I'd rather know you before I speak to you on there, with some exceptions. If you're a friend of a friend, or I'm communicating with you for professional reasons (I'm commissioning art from you, or editing some writing, that sort of thing), then speak freely, but do not be surprised if your message receives no reply. I'm a busy lady, I have many things to do.

My tags, of which there are many:

#Miss May's Magic - Inductions, hypnotic language, and other such things I, Myself, have made. Mantras, indoctrination posts, covert triggers… the list goes on. Abandon free will, all ye who enter here.

#How the Magic is Made: Informational posts about hypnosis. Do bear in mind that I love conversational/covert inductions, please. Enter at your own risk…

#Guard your Mind: Safety talks will go here. I have extensive opinions on this subject. Time will tell if they are revealed to you.

#Someone Else's Spellbook - If I see any ideas from someone else that I consider interesting, admirable, or just really goddamn hot, you'll find them here. Consider this a list of My personal favourites from others.

#Dominance as Joy - I'm a Dom. I'm always a Dom. I refuse to not love being a Dom. This involves some wants and needs considered 'violent' or 'distressing'. I want to degrade, hurt, and manipulate people, consensually, on purpose, for our mutual pleasure. I will not apologise for this. Fight Me. And by me I mean My thralls, because one of them has more muscles in their arm than I do in my entire body, and they can lift my ass up. Which is hot. Hi Dear!

That said, I do absolutely understand that you may not wish to see such things‚ so block this tag at your leisure. You are perusing My blog for your own reasons‚ I do not know them. If this is not to your taste, for whatever reason, I actively encourage you to look away.

#Powerful Playthings - Several of my hottest fantasies involve the unique interplay between submission and hypnosis, particularly the idea of having a switch control others for Me. You will find these ideas here. To be clear, I’m not a switch; I just enjoy a good bit of proxy warfare. Who doesn’t?

#Pretty Little Playthings - If I see any cute little subs being especially delectable and vulnerable, I may just have to comment... This may, of course, be to their detriment. Or their advantage; after all, shouldn't they want to serve Me?

#Thralls at All Times - CnC, constant control, unawareness, the unrelenting devotion to My will, anything that reminds My thralls that I command them at all times is found here. CnC is a personal favourite of Mine.

#Fuckery and Fun: Sometimes you just want to be silly. Hypnosis is an excellent tool for that.

#Kind On Purpose: Hypnosis can also be a tool used for immense kindness. Relaxation, de-stressing, massages with phantom touch, the eradication of fear, gender euphoria, hugs, intimacy, closeness. I choose to be kind on purpose.

#Cognitohazard Warning: Any spirals, swinging pendulums, hypnotic foci of all forms, they’ll be found here. I tend to avoid flashy ones by preference, but My standards may differ from yours, so if you’re at risk of eyestrain or worse, this is the tag to block. They should all be under readmores (and if you notice that one isn’t, please tell Me, I have not yet achieved apotheosis and can as such still make mistakes), but still, if you want to avoid those, block this. Or, if you want to be good for Me, have fun staring~

#Hot Shit - Listen, I may be ace, but people can still be hot. Sometimes. I like boobs. Boobs are good. Mmm, tiddy. Need to grow Me some of those…

#Project Masterwork: This one, my friends, I shall be keeping to Myself. Though, there is one person who might figure it out...

#Transgenderism and Faggotry: The gayest most trans shit imaginable. My ultimate goal is to create a post so transgender that it performs gender-reassignment surgery on everyone who reads it. And also causes Joanne Rowling to explode. Love trans people more than you hate transphobes, though. I'll know if you don't.

To be clear: this tag will be a celebration of queerness, never a challenge, or a discussion of, say, transphobia. While I may well discuss that topic, it will be tagged separately, under Masks Off, most likely. This is for joy, not for sorrow.

#The Gallery: I do love a good piece of Art. And art. Paintings, drawings, pixel art, and everything else, you'll find it here.

#Words Words Words - Should I ever feel the need to talk about my writing on this blog, or just writing in general, you'll find it here. Mostly this will relate to…

#The House of Fun - My kinky hypnotic writing universe. No clue if I'm ever going to talk about it here, but it does exist, and I assure you I am pioneering new and gayer forms of sex with every word I write for it. Also demons. Demons are hot.

#Mind Over Metal - Big robots, cybernetics, and mechs are extremely cool. No further information required. Also, yes, I am a robofucker. I see you, C&H Kalisto. I see that tetsubo. The things I would do to you are not covered by the Utopian Pillars.

#Speak of the Devil - I have a very specific kink for demons. Succubi, Tieflings, anything that carries hell in its heart, spells on its lips, and horns. More of my thralls should have horns, I think. The better for me to use as handles.

#Tally Five - Anything relating to my experiences with asexuality and how that affects my gender, kinkiness, and sexuality will end up here. It's a complex one, to be sure...

#Miss May's Meanderings - At some point, I will inevitably begin rambling about a subject partially or completely unrelated to hypnosis or kink. This will go here. Or I might also ramble about kink! That works too!

#Pinned to the Wall - Personal favourites, for whatever reason. Anything that particularly strikes My fancy can be found here. Note, this most certainly does not mean they're better in some way than the other posts - just that they stick with Me in a way others don't.

#Supplicants Speak to Me - A record of any asks I may receive from others, for good or for ill. Come into my parlour! It ended well enough for the spider‚ didn't it? Be at ease, honoured guest; the only dangers you'll find here are very, very enjoyable. I'm sure you'll agree with me on that... and on a great many other things, too.

#All are Welcome - Disability-related posts, specifically in regards to kink. Everyone is welcome here. Everyone. Regardless of how your bodies and minds may betray you, you deserve to be loved how you desire. This includes Me, too, hard as it is to remember some days...

#Masks Off - This is My 'serious issues' tag. If I'm putting this in play, I'm making a genuine point, going off on a major rant, or otherwise being far more direct and less hypnohorny than this blog normally is. Imagine Me turning off the spiral on-screen and replacing it with diagrams, or the like.

#Divine Your Fate - The eagle-eyed amongst you may have noticed that I have something of a divinity kink. I will admit, referring to Myself in capital letters is something of an affectation from this part of Me. This will be one part heretical conversation, two parts acts that would get Me banned from the church I used to go to, and one part lusting over the idea of corrupting the divine to My purposes.

#Remember It My Way - Memory play! Unawareness, memory modification, common sense alterations, long-term brainwashing, the occasional bit of gaslighting, induced forgetfulness... The list goes on. In fact, you're sure there's supposed to be more here... aren't you?

#Mesmerising Magecraft: Hypnosis is literal, actual magic, yes, but sometimes fiction creates more magical magics of magicness, and here shall they be found. Enchantments, spells, magical beings both benign and malevolent; this is the place for them.

#Supremely Suggestible: Superpowers! Some of them are interesting to Me! And not just the mind-controlling ones! But seriously, there's a lot of hypnosis and hypnosis-adjacent stuff going on in superhero (and, more importantly, supervillain) fiction that I'd like to talk about sometimes.

[alpaca-clouds]

232 Years Ago King Louis XVI got beheaded - and here is why!

Okay, I kinda wanted to make this one later, but then a friend said that it would be dumb, because today is the darn anniversary of this event. Which is correct.

So, in Castlevania Nocturne we see the execution of King Louis XVI, which evokes three emotions of the characters watching it.

Annette goes: "Good riddance." Richter goes: "Well, but is this right?" Alucard goes: "Well, this will make things go bad."

But here is the thing. Most of us have suffered through very bad history classes, in which we kinda learned about the French Revolution, but probably did not REALLY learn anything about it. I tried it with my friends. Nobody could tell me either why Louis was executed, nor could anyone tell me why the Revolution actually failed. People were fairly sure that it failed, but that was about all they could tell me.

So, let me go a bit into Louis and the Revolution.

Louis was one of those kings who were really bad with the one thing that kings are supposed to make: decisions. When the people started to rise up, and get into a bit of a revolutionary mood, Louis was very, very indecisive on what to do. A lot of people at the time made jokes about how Marie Antoinette was the actual person who was doing all those decisions and what not, because Louis was so bad with his indecision.

When the people got angry, he kinda hesitantly agreed to allow an elected government, as long as he could veto everything. And the elected government was basically made up 25% of nobles, and 25% of clergy (despite clergy and nobles only making up about 3% of the population) and only 50% supposed peasants. And then they wanted to make it, that the nobles and clergy members would not meet with the peasants.

However, some of the nobles did rise up against this (mainly nobles that themselves were marginalized through queerness or disability) and basically the National Assembly formed, there was a declaration of the rights of men, and the constitution was written. And what France at the time were aiming for was a Constitutional Monarchy - the same way that England was having it.

It was especially Lafayette who pushed for this and was doing his best to a) protect the king, and b) stopped the violence from escalating. Historians to this day are kinda discussing whether he wanted to increase his own influence, or whether he really just saw the writing on the wall of how much the violence were going to escalate.

And generally at the time the people were still quite benevolent towards the king. It was like: "Yay, we are all a big French family, and the king is out father! Fraternity!"

Either way: Louis and his family were made to live in Paris, being guarded by Lafayette and the National Guard. Until one day in 1791 Louis and family suddenly were gone. The official narration was: "Oh, the king got kidnapped." But a lot of people at the time were like:

Pretty much nobody fell for it.

Louis and his family have of course fled and tried to flee the country. Their flight was kinda dumb. They dressed as peasants, but also had the fanciest fucking carriage that you could imagine. And after a while Louis started to talk with the people, despite everyone knowing what he looked like (mainly because he had a very distinctive nose). And at some point someone was like: "Yeah, no, this is the supposedly kidnapped king. I am gonna alarm someone." And then Louis was dragged back to Paris, just shortly because he managed to reach the Belgian border.

He was dragged back to Paris, and it was then that the discussions really started of what was supposed to happen with him. Mainly, too, because at this point some of the surrounding kings started to be a bit nervous about the entire thing. Originally they were happy that France was less of a danger to them, but then they were like: "Oh, shit, if the people get ideas from this, they might dispose us, too." So they started to think about a) saving Louis and his family, and b) getting rid of this darn revolution.

And of course Louis, now stopped from fleeing, tried to communicate and collaborate with those other kings. And came out.

Now, the Revolutionaries originally declared war at the other kings - and Louis even agreed. The Revolutionaries agreed, because they knew they could not cower before the kings and show weakness. Louis agreed, because he hoped it would mean he would get saved. And so France went to war with a variety of neighboring regions.

And it was in this situation that people were starting to look at Louis and think: "Maybe he needs to die. Maybe we need to make a point out of killing him."

The national assembly voted on it, and by a margin of JUST ONE SINGLE VOTE they eventually decided to execute him. Mainly to make a point about their Revolution. And Louis was then very quickly executed within just two days on the morning of January 21st.

[anglercrit]

Alright. Pentleton has been (Unintended pun) finished the last image I sent was a Upscaled one I did myself before the leak ended up adding a better quality one. So here he is.

Bonus is a Bio Sheet (I added a bit of my Mental Illness to him.) I removed the Jack The Ripper connotations and went with a fictional killer with no ties to the real world.

Flags:

Transgender + Trans Masc

The Flag of Great Britain

AuDHD Flag

BiCurious + Pomosexual + Cupiosexual (All those kinda conflict but he's confused. Give the mans a break.)

For the screen readers who can't read:

Pentleton, Edward “Ed/Eddie” (born as Pentleton, Elizabeth “Eli”) | Sir Pentious / Saint Repentious

Eddie was born on March 4th 1807, London, England. To a high class family, growing up Pentleton always had a love for designing things such as varous inventions. Growing up Ed had always felt uncomfortable with his identity as he always felt comfortable as a male rather than a female, but never spoke out due to not knowing what his feelings were, he identified as Pentleton and not by his new perferred name in order to not attract any attention to himself. Pentleton suffered from an undiagnosed disability (It was later revealed it was a variant of Anxeity, Autism, ADHD and Biploar Scizoeffective.) spending most of his time in the safety of his family home he inherited he was a recluse preferring to actually make things that better suited his desires then basic human interaction. Pentleton was always unlucky. Despite being well off growing up, bad luck seemed to follow him everywhere, and as he grew into adulthood and the desire for basic human interaction dwindled. Pentleton always found comfort in doing hos own thing, and going to the library. One particular afternoon, (Circa. 1828, April 12th) Pentleton was apprehended on suspicion of murdering two young women in downtown London, despite the fact he was obviously not the killer and he was simply at the wrong place, at the wrong time. The police arrested him anyways, and with severe questioning, Pentleton folded, confessing to a crime he never committed out of duress. Because he “confessed” the police took that as guilt and sentenced him to public excution by hanging. While he was being held, Pentleton’s home was immediately searched and they found a prototype of a children’s toy called “Egg Boiz” the basis was they were essetionally a toy manufactured for the poor children of London to play with, for free. Most of Eddie’s blueprints were seized and are now being displayed in the “British Museum” to this day. Before Pentleton’s excution, there was rumors surfing around of his innocence as more murders were found when Pentleton was being held in the Stocks before he was sent to the hanging tree. No one really thought the killer was innocent mainly because of his “confession”. On exactly April, 22, 1828. 20 days after Pentleton’s conviction, Pentleton was executed in front of a bunch of high classes. His last words were allegedly: “I have a lot to say, but one of them is that humanity is willing to vindicate someone they viewed as dangerous, when the dangerous person is them all along. Part of being human is realizing everyone makes mistakes, well. You all made a huge one, by killing one snake, you freed another. And that’s a price that those poor girls will never understand. But hey, life goes on, I hope and pray that in the final events of my death that none of you make the same mistakes killing an innocent man.” After the hanging, Pentleton’s body was immediately burnt and the house he lived in is now a museum tour of some sorts, long after Pentleton’s death the killer struck again killing men and women over the course of the years. And ended up being found in the end. When Pentleton arrived to Heaven, Saint Peter didn’t gain him entry on the grounds of “Admitting to a murder” Pentleton’s unfair judgement made him damned for eternity not truly belonging in Hell.

Yup, I cooked and Im gonna go to bed. If people see this on my acc that means I posted it there too.

DAMN you did in fact cook- I just wanna say Saint Repentious is such a clever name i love it