#inner thoughts (musing)

[walkingstackofbooks]

I wanna talk about If Wishes Were Horses and Julian's deal with fake Jadzia because I was watching it, and like... half of the "fantasies" that came to life were just as much nightmares as anything. And the whole episode hinged on the existential threat being absolutely created out of their own fears.

So while, yes, I do think Jadzia's initial appearance was due to Julian's genuine fantasies, I kind of feel like all her subsequent actions once he realises what's going on are caused by his dread of how she might behave and embarrass him in front of the others?

And then of course there's the scene where she's very badly injured, which has got to be caused by Julian's fear, right? I mean, I can imagine him having a secret fantasy where she gets hurt and he manages to save her, but from his reaction it's clear he's really scared he's going to lose her.

(Also before that, fake Dax called him out on being worried, which he admitted to, and then asked him "Hold me, please", which I'm definitely taking as Julian's desire to be held in what is potentially their last few minutes manifesting.)

[lilyth-art]

Hipnosis🐍

The muse that inspired this piece is a mystery… real? perhaps… perhaps it protects, perhaps it consumes, but it certainly enchants.✨

It was made in a hurry, imperfect here and there… but I think that makes it even more interesting. It’s not overthought — just came to be as it was.

[theweightofdivinity]

Not a soul knows my name, the real me, not even I.

I know my human form, the face, the voice, the character cast in this strange play. I know her lines, her wounds, her hunger. I know her well, but the one who moves through her? the one who witnesses her, The soul? That part remains unknown. It lives on, it’s still remembering itself through her mortal vessel, living, piece by piece.

For she is a return.

[lost-monster-16]

"Escape the cage of unreachable dreams, let your intuition speak, cherish who you are, and walk boldly into your inner reckoning."

[elemwire]

A Prince

There was once a prince who fell from grace,

Whose father tried to restore his faith,

Lost in thought and sidetracked by gusts,

He fell prey to the chains of lust.

The demon who ensnared him knew,

His rule of tyranny on the prince was few,

For his father always watched from above,

The demon trembled in front of his love.

Still, the prince was tormented at night,

By muses and sirens, passions and delights,

All the while falling deep into trance,

Spellbound under the demon's romance.

Oh prince, why won't you look up on high,

And ask for forgiveness, it won't be denied,

Your father truly longs for the day,

His prodigal son returns from far away.

-Sebastian Devassy Cherian

@elemwire

[howifeltabouthim]

So she is capable of this, is she? David might have thought, taking mental notes for the heroine in his novel, or maybe he didn't think that at all. Who knows how it is with men, their mental system of connections? They could be thinking of anything at all: an ignored stock tip, an unresolved problem, a cold pale ale, a plump pair of lips, a way to untangle themselves from a complicated situation.

Irina Reyn, from What Happened to Anna K.

[imsodark]

When Reverend Jen of Fundie Fridays said "I love the girly aesthetic, but I'm not sure about my gander." I was like, holy shit, that explains my gender identity.

(I don't know if anyone who follows my blog watches the YouTube channel Fundie Fridays, but go do that!)

As someone who was born with the sex female, accepts she/her pronouns, enjoys makeup and feminine clothes, and loves to use tags like 'tumblr girl' or 'girlblogging', 'girlrotting', etc. Yet, identifies as Genderqueer... And tries to feel the freedom, that's really emblematic of my own journey. It's hard, and gender is such a spectrum, with so many words to describe it - God, I know this is only the beginning of the language to describe my identity.

Thanks for reading!

[the-storm-chaser]

'To know the truth...to know who was to blame...

...I have my quarry.

....She will burn

And I hope it hurts....more than it did for me.'

[xxdreamscapes]

diary 061225 | 10:00 pm

personal growth + unconditional love of self

I know I’ve grown, because my biggest fear used to be abandonment. Being alone, by myself. I don't mind it so much nowadays

But now, it’s hurting people I care about. It’s seeing them in any sort of pain or suffering. Additionally, it’s living with no integrity. Being deceitful, living lies, and sitting around talking about other people all day. It’s not being myself to the fullest extent I can be, and wasting my time getting bums to recognize my worth when I already know what I bring into my relationships

I’m not alone, I’ve never been alone. 

I’ve always known some form of friendship or guidance. It's never been that difficult for me to make and grow friendships. I know this because I would get put down by my own friends for being friendly with so many people or *knowing everyone*. It read as bitterness most of the time, but I paid no attention to it. Even at an early age I knew it was about their insecurities and not me. But it didn't not sting. All I fucking did was listen to people and be decent to them the best I could. I think some people just can't grapple with the fact that you can get to know people without any ulterior motives, without wanting anything out of them besides the friendship. I don't need material, sex, or an ego boost. I just want to recharge with people who care about eachother.

I digress.

Childhood friends, acquaintances. Even coworkers — kindred spirits. I didn’t see it when I was younger, but now I firmly believe that I’ve always been gently guided by those who came before me. I stand on the shoulders of giants. I’m beyond lucky to have friends, my family, my parents and siblings. And the person who picked me up every damn time I thought I wouldn’t make it. Myself bitch

I’m my own best friend before anyone else’s. I am my own life partner before anyone else’s. I am already whole and I have love, and people do miss me as I miss them. I am worthy and I am grateful. No matter who comes, goes, leaves or stays. No one can abandon you if you don’t abandon yourself first. I’ll always be solid as long I got me.

This, I’m certain.

⋆⁺₊⋆ + ⋆⁺₊ ⋆ ☁︎

when I feel that sullen nostalgia for people and places that grew me, but didn't know me, I try to remember I wouldn't be me without them

current rotation: "oldfriends" by dreamfone, "Payphone" by Maroon 5, "One More Weekend" by Against The Current

[glass-strawberries]

simple wish

to feel the flowers

touch the grass

smell the air

breeze on past

to keep a promise

mend a heart

obtain a love

play a part

to stay awake

save your tears

obey, oblige 

face your fears

a brave soul

a single kiss

a daring mind 

a simple wish

[free-grandmaa]

"You'll never see me again.. Only the sun, and the greens.. I pray I'm never found, next time around."

[chazzltup]

𝟏... 𝟐 ...

𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖....

[theweightofdivinity]

I’ve been feeling it. Not in the loud ways, but in the sacred whispers between the mundane. The kind that is so deeply felt. People showing up. Not for performance. Not for applause. But in reverence. Not everyone brings flowers in the literal sense, but some of you have placed them at my feet, with your kindness, your energy, your words, your presence, and I know what that is. I know what it means. It’s devotion in disguise. It’s love without a transaction. It’s the soul remembering the soul. Some of you have shown up in ways that felt like kneeling, not out of worship, but out of respect for something you saw in me, that maybe I forgot how to see in myself for a moment. And I want you to know that I’ve noticed. I’ve felt it. It brought me back to something I’ve always known but needed to remember… I am not here to beg to be seen. I am here to be received. There’s a difference, those of you who see me already know that. So this is not just a thank you. It’s my deepest acknowledgment to you. From the goddess in me to the god in you. From the human in me to the human in you. No debt. No need. Just presence. That is more than enough.

[journey-to-balance]

People seem to think embracing life means to do the wild and unexpected, like jumping off cliffs and going out of your way to start conversations with strangers.

Or maybe it's much simpler than that ... Sometimes, it’s just slowly learning to love yourself.

[herquirkiness]

The moment you stop having faith in others is the moment the light goes out.

[whimsicweaver]

My Diary Friend

“And most may say the life of being a diary friend is uncertain and possibly unfair but my little girl just really needs me here. So here I’ll always stay for a long, long time until we meet again for a giggle, cry or even her cute little smile.” Connecting to the heart of my precious Journal~ I have personally always loved to journal ever since I was a little young Earthling and I've viewed my journal as a very close bestfriend; an extension of myself. My journal or diary has always provided me a safe haven and I'm proud to say that they've been the prime guardian of my inner child's heart and our dreams. It may be silly from an external perspective, calling my journal a friend but it's another subtle form of unconditional love that exists within my reality and for that I am most grateful.

~Elunara W.