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strawberrysasuke · 2 months ago

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Sasuke’s devotion

...as demonstrated in the first arc of the Boruto manga. Where we get intriguing insight into Sasuke & Naruto's dynamic as adults, and further reinforcement of some of the seeds Kishimoto planted in Gaiden.

I’m not exactly addressing the full scope of their bond here. The central theme of this post is Sasuke’s side of things and an exploration of his acts of love. But naturally, Naruto’s reciprocation factors into it and is addressed accordingly.

Although I intended to recount the events of this arc in chronological order, strictly sticking to that was messing with the general flow of things. So I jump back and forth between chapters a bit, especially towards the end so pls bare with me lol. But ultimately I don't think the order matters too much and where it does, I point it out.

Final note - I really like the movie, but it's been a while since I watched, so I didn't reference it much here.

He feels Naruto's pain, as his own

When Sasuke first meets Boruto, the interaction is swift. He only offers a matter-of-fact acknowledgement of Boruto's status as Naruto's son, responds to Hinata's greeting with a question about her husband, followed by an immediate exit to instead greet the sole reason he's even there at all.

It's not long before Naruto can't help but spill his innermost concerns about Boruto's future and that of shinobis as a whole. Sasuke immediately takes this to heart and appears sombre as he listens intently. He knows Naruto's heart and with that comes an intimate understanding of his woes, as if they were his own. It's evident in how he appears increasingly agitated in the next panel as he refuses to entertain Naruto's disillusioned train of thought.

He doubles down with a simple, but definitive statement - “the true nature of a ninja never changes, no matter how the tides may shift”. Simultaneously, we get an intentional flash of the headband that Sasuke lovingly always carries with him and has been doing so for years.

The statement itself goes beyond a simple iteration of his shinobi philosophy. It's being directly linked to a precious momento of their love and devotion to each other. Making it known that this belief Sasuke holds is actually rooted in and inspired by his love for Naruto. It's also a matter of the future that Naruto is referencing, is one they envisioned and decided to cultivate together -- their joint legacy. So he's naturally protective of it.

Every time he invokes this statement throughout this arc, it's a fond expression of exactly these two things: his devotion to Naruto and commitment to honouring his -- and by extension their - shinobi legacy.

Sasuke draws from his own source of faith (his boundless love) to counter and comfort Naruto's dwindling hope. Knowing this is something that will resonate deeply, and serve to renew his hope and in turn, soothe his worries.

It works perfectly, as Naruto is immediately on the same wavelength and echoes the words Sasuke left unspoken. Although not entirely convinced, he appears far more relaxed. If the person he trusts the most in the world still has faith, he's willing to listen.

The meeting is brief, yet in the span of a few minutes, Sasuke managed to leave Naruto more at ease than he found him. But he's not quite done yet.

A new mission

Sasuke leaves the Hokage's office with a very important personal mission: make the love of his life feel better.

Naruto's primary concern was a question of his son's shinobi spirit and the resultant gap in shared values is a major source of strain in their relationship. So Sasuke makes it his goal to train Boruto into a shinobi Naruto would be proud of. And in turn, tenderly nurture the spirit of Naruto he so vividly sees in him -- the source of his unwavering faith in the true nature of shinobis persisting no matter the day and age.

His first step being to task Boruto with learning the rasengan is extremely intentional, and very sweet. Since this is a jutsu very dear to Naruto; created by his father and passed down by his teacher. Also (not sure if Sasuke knows this, but we definitely do) something he learned solely to protect his most precious person -- Sasuke.

So he knows how happy Naruto would be to see his son inherit it. Judging by the way Naruto cannot stop grinning ear-to-ear after finally witnessing it -- he was absolutely right.

Naruto's happiness >>> planet-endangering threat

The minute he learned that something was bothering Naruto, all other priorities became secondary. Including a planet-endangering threat, apparently. We discover that Sasuke did, in fact, get severely sidetracked during their earlier meeting.

It's hilarious that he's casually divulging the most crucial information gathered from his latest mission, like it’s an afterthought. Even Naruto is baffled as he sinks down in his chair, trying to process the looming disaster that's potentially about to strike this planet.

We've seen it play out time and time again (even heard him outright admit it) but this is another reminder that for Sasuke, Naruto’s wellbeing takes precedence over literally everything else, including the rest of the world -- Naruto is his world.

To be loved, is to be known

We continue to explore the depths of Sasuke's reverence, when we see how disturbed he is by Boruto’s suspicious progress with his ninjutsu training. The immediate side-by-side with Naruto as a child and the way he recoils (squinting, frowning, brows intensely furrowed, turning his entire body away) at the difference in their respective spirits lol

Naruto is the ultimate standard for him so of course it stings when someone who resembles him so closely, fails to live up to it. Bringing it back to Sasuke's philosophy in chapter 1 -- rather than a faith in shinobis as a collective, it's more so that as long as Naruto's spirit persists in shinobis, Sasuke will continue to believe. This underpins why Sasuke regards being 'just like Naruto' as the best compliment he could give to Boruto when he does eventually become a 'true ninja'.

The subsequent scene set after their first training session, is of Sasuke so fondly and earnestly recounting Naruto’s story. It's not a surface-level recollection, instead full of feeling and intimate familiarity. He starts right off the bat with calling Naruto a 'noisy idiot' and 'half-wit' LMAO. The whole thing is a demonstration of how this reverence and adoration can be traced back decades -- yet still persists as passionately as ever, if not more.

This conversation also fleshes out a key difference between them -- who actually knows Naruto. Or rather, who Naruto has allowed to know him.

This motif first appears in the events leading up to Sasuke catching a punch Boruto meant to throw at his father.

In his outburst to Hinata moments prior, Boruto highlights the core of the problem. He essentially has no idea who Naruto is past the role of Hokage; knows nothing at all of the history preceding it. Naruto hasn’t disclosed these parts of himself to his son, leading to this massive disconnect that’s been allowed to fester and evolve into bitterness.

Hinata attempts and spectacularly fails to remedy this (since she also doesn’t know him, just fawns over the idea of him and even more so that Naruto’s never given her access either) -- only for Sasuke to appear as a beacon of hope for the boy soon after.

The issue is further reinforced as Boruto enters his dad's office, seeking out that knowledge. As he holds Naruto’s childhood jacket, he's made tangibly aware of the dirt, wear and tear that hold stories he’s never had access to. Core parts of his dad that he simply doesn’t recognise -- and it frustrates him all over again, as he throws it out onto the street.

In the charged silence immediately after, the doorbell rings and it’s Sasuke. This arrival completely changes the course of Naruto and Boruto’s fractured relationship -- epitomised in Sasuke picking up that very jacket later, as if picking up the pieces.

It all leads to this moment by the firepit. Boruto takes the opportunity to enquire about Naruto, and the picture Sasuke paints is so different from his own perception. It's so profound and the intimacy shared between Sasuke and Naruto is so loud and apparent, that it's difficult for Boruto to even comprehend. Since the difference between their experience of the real Naruto is vast.

Picking up the pieces

We get a glimpse into how fractured things are in the sequence of events before Naruto sends a congratulatory message to his son for passing the first stage of the chunin exam.

It’s intriguing that upon hearing the news, Naruto opts to hide his real feelings from Shikamaru. He actively rejects Shikamaru's attempt at getting him to open up about his family troubles, irritatedly shutting down his bid for connection. Yet in the first chapter, we witnessed how Naruto so readily share said troubles with Sasuke.

Naruto pretends to be unaffected by the news, but Shikamaru’s watchful eye catches on and urges him to convey his real feelings to Boruto. Shikamaru didn't account for the actual extent of Naruto's emotional disconnect though, so his advice is enacted in a rather awkward way, via email.

Boruto’s reaction to it is very sad, too. The way he’s torn between being genuinely happy to receive his dad's acknowledgement, but he can't stifle the disappointment at how distant the attempt was.

But we're privy to the fact that this was a huge undertaking on Naruto's end. It's astonishing how big a feat a simple online expression of feelings was to him. To the extent that he's profusely sweating and collapsing in his chair from the tension release after it's done.

Even when Shikmaru first makes the suggestion, Naruto looks so miserable -- the bags around his eyes are suddenly terribly prominent. He's exhausted at the mere thought of conveying his feelings, and Shikamaru's mildly exasperated but knowing expression points to this being the norm. This dysfunctional relationship with his son has been persisting for a long time.

These two evidently have a lot of work to do in untangling the years of distance, and resultant mutual emotional disconnect which, on Boruto's end, cultivated resentment.

Boruto’s progress is a major factor in healing this -- every point of progress acts as an opportunity for father and son to reconnect, and they get closer to reconciliation. The primary orchestrator of this is Sasuke, who's essentially pulling the strings to bridge that gap by training and guiding Boruto to align with the shinobi values Naruto holds so dear. Carefully nurturing that point of connection between them.

This link is also established in the text as the panel immediately after a display of their strained relationship (Naruto heaving a sigh of relief after sending a simple email), is a cut to Sasuke training Boruto and facilitating that instrumental development.

Naruto's only exception

Let's further explore the peek we got into how Naruto keeps everyone at an arm's length in his life now -- it's very telling of his emotional state in adulthood. He has become someone who finds emotional exchanges to be an excruciating process.

We see a repeat of Naruto feigning indifference when he's obviously antsy about if Boruto passed the second stage of the chunin exam. Immediately upon Shikamaru's arrival with said news, he pretends to be working.

The same Shikamaru he knows can see right through it all -- but still, he remains absolutely committed to this poor act of nonchalance. He even waits until the guy's out of earshot before allowing himself to be happy.

It made me wonder why he's trying so hard to not be perceived. We know Naruto is someone who has a lot of feelings, all the time. That's who he is and always has been. However in adulthood, we're consistently shown that he is so adamant about witholding access to himself. Whereas in his younger years, he wanted so desperately to be seen, heard and thereby accepted.

The answer lies in the various roles he now plays and embodies -- he is the Hokage. A war hero that saved the planet. The strongest shinobi to ever exist. A married man with kids. He's been perceived to hell and back at this point; romantically, platonically, parentally, and authoritatively, etc. Experienced every type of bond there is.

He's constantly under surveillance from his peers, colleagues, the villagers, the shinobi world, his stalker-turned-wife, and his kids that look up to him. He must even feel watched by his own parents and teacher, whose legacies he dedicated his entire adult life to honouring. While not all ill-intentioned or undeserved, the sheer scale of it and the expectations he's subject to must be exhausting.

On top of -- rather, because of -- that he's closeted. Perpetually suffering the unrelenting consequences of repressing his sexuality and being pressured into a one-sided marriage. Forced to endure this lifelong facade. All done in his ultimate pursuit of acceptance (read more about Naruto's repression in this post here).

All he ever wanted growing up were bonds -- as an adult, he's being crushed under their weight. Rendering him a jaded, detached figure that won't allow the tiniest glimpse past his strict defenses and carefully maintained mask of Hokage.

Sasuke is the only exception; the love of his life has absolute, free reign past these barriers.

Where his face goes blank from his confusion at Shikamaru initiating a 'trivial'* exchange, he'll happily indulge Sasuke discussing an equally 'trivial' matter of merely meeting Naruto's son. Not even reporting a necessarily meaningful exchange, either. Just recalling how he bore a strong resemblance to him.

Which Naruto has no issue indulging to the fullest extent, even voluntarily steering the conversation in a deeper, more vulnerable direction. We've seen him pointedly reject someone like Shikamaru's similar attempts, yet a few chapters prior, he spills his guts to Sasuke before he even has to ask.

For once in his adult life, in Sasuke's presence, we're shown Naruto completely and intentionally unguarded.

*I'm using quotations marks because these are not trivial exchanges, but this is the standard that Naruto sets up and fails to follow when it comes to Sasuke lmao

To love, is to endure

Okay this part is gonna be a bit of a journey so pls bear with me. This deciphering room conversation has always intrigued me. Comparing it to some previous exchanges they've shared, allows us to explore the implications of what transpired here.

It reveals the existence of a line between them, shaped by years of repression and restraint and the product of their circumstances. One that Sasuke occassionally draws.

At the heels of Naruto’s explosive joy, this scene brings with it a stark shift in tone. Their arrangement is the first clue to the underlying unease -- they're positioned a few steps apart, perfectly capable of having this conversation face-to-face, yet actively choosing to have their backs to each other. Notably, they don’t make eye contact once.

After discussing business, Sasuke immediately excuses himself, but is stopped by Naruto calling his name. The corresponding expression is strangely tense, almost anticipatory. He doesn’t even respond, instead lets Naruto do the talking, while maintaining the same look.

It even continues after Naruto reveals that he’s aware that Sasuke has been training Boruto. The tension echoes in Sasuke’s subsequent responses being rather drawn-out, punctuated with several pauses.

While Naruto is the opposite, and evidently walked in here with a clear purpose -- to confront Sasuke. Why? He loves to bask in the fact that Sasuke loves him, and will jump at opportunities for affirmation.

We've established how every step Sasuke has taken so far in this arc has been motivated by love. Which drives him to stick around in a town he seldom visits, to execute his master plan of easing Naruto’s troubles -- his commitment to restoring his beloved's faltering hope. Naruto came here to openly recognise this.

The sequence of this deciphering room interaction mirrors a dialogue during the fourth shinobi world war (ch 680). Naruto confronts Sasuke regarding the real reason behind him so single-mindedly protecting Naruto. Declaring he now understands how it was possible for Sasuke's body to 'move on its own' to save someone precious to him (this entire scene is broken down nicely here).

His playfully smug grin is a testament to him absolutely reveling in the knowledge that Sasuke has been acting out of love. If you compare Naruto's expression here with the one in the Boruto panel, they're very similar -- so the intentions behind them can be reasonably equated. Sasuke's answer in this case is also extremely charged silence, functioning as confirmation for Naruto.

Naruto also knows that Sasuke deliberately concealed training Boruto from him, so by choosing to bring it up anyway, he’s looking for a reaction -- another confirmation.

We've seen how even when Sasuke’s glaring daggers into him, Naruto is busy blushing under his intense gaze instead. He enjoys being the object of Sasuke’s undivided attention (and affection). Everytime he recalls Sasuke considering him a worthy opponent, he’s overtaken by uncontainable excitement (this post dives into this further).

One of the major ways their love manifests is in their mutual respect and appreciation of each other’s strengths. For Naruto especially, this is embodied in moments of acknowledgement -- hence why he was so lovestruck at Sasuke’s “I want to fight you…” It’s the best outlet they’ve found to express and enact their love given the circumstances and heteronormative, homophobic society under which their bond formed.

That's also why Naruto is so sincere in upholding the integrity of their fights; only deeming it a worthy match if they’re fighting on equal terms. So on the hospital rooftop, he insists that Sasuke put his headband on, so they can spar as equals. Then in the first Valley of the End fight, moments after Sasuke unlocks his third tomoe due to the sheer gravity of his love for Naruto -- in another act of love, he complies with Naruto’s desires for an honest fight by putting on that very headband.

Contrasting all this with the discussion earlier about Naruto’s growing and deeply held distaste for being perceived by others while here he is (and always has been), going out of his way to seek out Sasuke’s lmao.

So, we can say that in the deciphering room scene, Naruto is essentially initiating a moment of intimacy and awaiting reciprocation. Yet, all Sasuke can offer is a loaded pause. Eventually when he does respond, it's a matter-of-fact reiteration that puts an end to the conversation altogether. Still an affirmation, but a rather (and unusually) flat one.

It doesn't come to a soft, warm-hearted conclusion like their last exchange during chapter 1, but instead with both bearing rather rigid expressions. Naruto is left tight-lipped and dejected and Sasuke has no smile to offer this time. Viewing them side-by-side really amplifies the contrast in tone and outcome.

Even Sasuke's engagement with the statement ("the essence of a ninja never changes" -- the significance of which I mentioned at the start) is off. He engages with it four times during this arc, yet his attitude this time is strikingly different from the other three.

This establishes the existence of that line I mentioned at the beginning. One forged a long, long time ago -- stemming from their repressed feelings.

There’s allusions to this in Gaiden, too - specifically that ‘cooperation’ panel (an outline of implications of this scene can be found here and here). You can feel something simmering between them, courtesy of the little clues Kishimoto leaves through the construction of a strained atmosphere.

The uneasy undercurrent and its implications is something even Sakura picks up on, rendering her particularly distressed because it’s yet another reminder that her 'husband' has never, and will never belong to her lol. Them being in their own little world, a space she's never had access to, is something she's always been insecure about and deeply unsettled by.

The 'cooperation' and deciphering room dialogues also follow the same sequence:

Naruto initiates intimacy - admitting he’s ready to drop everything (the village, his kids, his wife) and essentially uproot his life to be with Sasuke.

Sasuke, woefully and reluctantly but fueled by pettiness, draws a hard line -- throwing Naruto's own words back at him.

Naruto is left dejected yet guilty-looking, since this outcome and the mutual misery underpinning it is a direct consequence of his own choices.

Another similarity can be found in the scene where Sasuke was disappointed in Boruto’s artificially induced progress in his ninja training. Since this called into question whether he really did emobody Naruto's shinobi spirit. But Sasuke proceeded to withold his own unpleasant feelings about the matter, and engaged in Boruto’s pretense and allowed the kid to become his disciple.

And in the deciphering room, despite being bristled and slow to reciprocate, Sasuke entertains Naruto’s initiation of intimacy in a pointedly careful and controlled manner.

Totally oblivious to Sasuke's suspicions, Boruto was excited since he focused primarily on the affirmative decision. Whereas Naruto knows him well enough to receive Sasuke's pettiness in full-force and, like in Gaiden, looks quite guilty over it.

In both cases, of course it's not ill-natured -- Sasuke is just unsettled. He wants Boruto to work hard and become a true shinobi by honest means, and he of course, absolutely loves indulging Naruto. It's precisely because he cares so much, that he acts this way.

Naruto and Sasuke's relationship is no stranger to mutual and silly acts of pettiness, but the pattern of Sasuke engaging in petty behaviour twice outside of regular bickering, is intriguing. To explore this, we have to consider the motivations behind petty behaviour, specifically in close interpersonal relationships.

This study points to the highly affective nature of pettiness. You’re not petty about things that don’t bother you. Things don’t bother you, unless you care. And in this case, Sasuke cares a lot. Hence why Naruto’s bold approaches, when contrasted with the harsh reality of his choices, leaves Sasuke quite bothered. It’s ultimately hurt derived from love (read this great post that explores the theme of conformity in Naruto's ending).

The same study also drew a negative correlation between petty behaviour and life satisfaction. Although Sasuke is genuinely happy to be by Naruto’s side in whatever capacity…of course he’d much rather do it married*. Living the life they deserved. Yet they find themselves here, as miserable adults miserably married to their respective stalkers. So yes, there is a lot to be dissatisfied (and therefore petty) about lol

*(I mean this more in a comparative sense to their current situation. Idk if marriage in the traditional/ceremonial sense, would necessarily be the route they'd take if they could have -- just being together romantically, whether married or as boyfriends, is more so what i'm referring to)

Combined, I believe all of this points to the existence of a tangible line that was established by the homophobic and heteronormative society they live in. That they begrudingly maintain as tired, repressed adults.

It's also something they're bound to by the duty they share as being the strongest shinobi to ever exist. This particular motif is reflected through their attire in the deciphering room scene, since it's first time we see them meeting with Naruto in his Hokage robe. Sasuke's own cloak is also tightly closed, when it’s otherwise deliberately shown open (or in the movie, completely shed) in Naruto's presence.

It's like their robes function as another layer of separation, encasing them in the shells of their respective roles. Naruto as Hokage, the protector of the village, and Sasuke as Naruto's protective shadow. One role successively binds the other.

This boundary built on shared responsibility as the strongest shinobi. Something that they equally feel and are passionate about but it falls slightly more heavily on Naruto and the extra layer of expectations he's chronically bound to (as discussed earlier). But Sasuke is willing to follow him anywhere (very fitting of his role as a 'shadow'), even to such agonizing ends -- where Sasuke feels not only his own pain, but also intimately experiences Naruto’s pain as his own (vice versa).

Their shared repression manifests in these little moments, where they struggle against that line. Sometimes, they brush up against it, and when Naruto is the initiator -- unable to keep his desires from manifesting -- Sasuke is the one to bring them back to reality. The reality of Naruto’s choices. And the reality that Sasuke will stand beside him anyway. He loves him, so he will endure.

“But Sasuke accepted him nevertheless. His love for Naruto is like a rock steady faith, a prayer. No matter what happens, he can't and won't stop loving and caring for Naruto. He joined in Naruto's goal of uniting all shinobis, and he is accountable to Naruto.” - from this great post on the concept of Sasuke’s love for Naruto being like a prayer and op further discusses their bond in adulthood.

No words needed

When Momoshiki attacks the stadium during the final stage of the chunin exam, Naruto decides to take on the enemy alone. He entrusts Sasuke with the safety of their children, then looks at him so tenderly. Almost like carefully asking for permission -- they always fight by each other's side, but this time, it'd be best if Naruto went alone. So it's also a look of reassurance.

Because look at Sasuke -- he's so stiff. He makes the promise, but not without hesitation and is so tight-lipped while doing so. Sasuke has always been one to struggle with Naruto entering dangerous situations, where Sasuke can't protect him like he desperately wants to (read more about it here). Naruto recognises this and softly soothes him, silently asking for his faith. They know and share the pain in each other's hearts, after all.

Through this look alone, it's apparent they're exchanging feelings only they know. Naruto is making a request only Sasuke can fulfill. That he only trusts Sasuke with. And Sasuke trusts him right back. So he makes the promise.

Knowing each other's hearts has also meant that they've never needed words to understand what they do for each other's sakes. A way this is shown in this arc, is through the symbolism of Naruto's childhood jacket.

The jacket is present during key events -- a major one being when Sasuke first makes that declaration: “the true nature of a ninja never changes, no matter how the tides may shift.” After Boruto threw it out of the window, Sasuke rescues and returns it to Naruto, who was holding it when he first heard those words.

It is also an embodiment of Naruto’s legacy -- which Sasuke has been protecting and nurturing all this time -- and holds so much history in the wears and tears. And in that, it also becomes a marker of substantial progress between him and his son.

Naruto was quite bothered by how, compared to his own, Boruto's clothes were too clean. This small fact represents the difference in their lives growing up and thus their shared values, being too vast for them to truly understand each other.

The scene outlined above occurs immediately after the deciphering room scene. The same Naruto that collapsed in his chair after sending a short email, makes sure to tangibly and meaningfully convey his congratulations and how proud he is of Boruto, face-to-face. To which Boruto is overjoyed to the point of tears. This is the most tender exchange we’ve seen between them, thus far.

And Naruto knows that it's all thanks to the love of his life that he was able to take this step. The jacket is functioning as a symbol of this very fact and the faith that Sasuke restored in him. That's why he's holding it so tenderly in the panels immediately after.

In chapter 1, he was squeezing it tightly between his hands, distorting the fabric -- looking downwards at it as he resigned himself to hopelessness. Now, he's cradling it so delicately and smiling up at the sky.

They didn't have to exchange any words explicitly detailing Sasuke's contributions for him to receive the feelings embedded in them. To know that he is deeply cherished by his most precious person. And the manifestations of this person's love, heals his hopes for a brighter future.

He keeps his promise

Following the revelation of Boruto cheating both throughout and in the final stage of the chunin exam, the progress they made in repairing their relationship is momentarily but spectacularly shattered. This, too, is once again remedied by Sasuke. With earnest devotion, Sasuke honours Naruto's act of entrusting his child to him.

He finds Boruto and gently but firmly reprimands his dishonest actions, before guiding him in the right direction learn from his mistakes. He rebuilds Boruto’s drive and self-confidence by placing the utmost faith in him, and imparts Naruto’s feelings on his behalf. And then in an incredibly paternal gesture, he lends Boruto his most dearly cherished momento -- the headband. Essentially entrusting this child with inheriting his and Naruto's shared shinobi legacy. It's a testament to how much Sasuke’s grown to care for and believe in Boruto, and created such a meaningful bond.

I wonder if he sees himself in Boruto, since Sasuke was also a kid desperately chasing his father's acknowledgement. In which case, Boruto isn't only a mirror for Naruto, but also reflects parts of Sasuke.

Mentoring a child you see some reflections of your own childhood struggles in, and the act of guiding and supporting them through it can facilitate a person’s own healing.

(Just to be clear -- I’m not making a total 1:1 comparison between Fugaku & Sasuke, and Naruto & Boruto’s relationships, or the respective characters themselves. The circumstances, nuances and severity of the two father-son relationships, are different. But I think we can reasonably draw similarities on the essence of a child seeking their parent’s acknowledgement in both scenarios.)

This theme of healing lasting hurt manifests in the conclusive chapters of this arc. It begins with Sasuke avoiding eye contact with Naruto, as he shly zooms through his explanation and immediately exits to allow them to have a moment. Naruto is initially speechless. Partly in total awe of the results of Sasuke's efforts, and partly because he's not sure how to approach this conversation with Boruto.

From Naruto’s perspective, the last note he left Boruto on was quite a bad one, perhaps the lowest they’ve ever been. Then here comes Sasuke, with Boruto in stride wearing his childhood jacket and the headband Naruto kept and treasured for years while awaiting his beloved's return. A head-to-toe embodiment of not only their love, but what it means to be a true ninja which is something he was convinced had had its time.

We know in crucial moments, when he’s emotionally overwhelemed, Naruto is no stranger to cracking a joke to momentarily ease the tension. So he does exactly that.

They honestly share their true feelings, apologise and resolve the lingering bitterness that’s been hanging over them for years. Now, they can finally heal and move forward.

Sasuke fully succeeded in what he set out to do - making Naruto happy.

Boruto asking Naruto to share his stories is a direct callback to the advice Sasuke gave him after their first training session -- where he suggested that Boruto shift his perspective and seek out what Naruto had to experience to get here today.

In this tender moment of reconcilliation, Boruto does just that in asking to learn more about who the real Naruto is. Not as the village's Hokage, but as Uzumaki Naruto.

This all culminates beautifully in the final attack. Sasuke takes the lead and coordinates. While Naruto provides Boruto with the necessary encouragement to follow, both with words and in the form of lending the combined power of all the meaningful bonds in his life, to create that ultimate rasengan.

Boruto is moved to tears at the life his dad has lived. All the trials and tribulations he endured to get to this point -- an insight he’d always yearned for.

We get this massive panel of Naruto and Sasuke’s clash at the valley of the end. Among all of Naruto's history with the rasengan, only his father and Sasuke's contributions are individuated.

Rasengan is a jutsu Naruto learned to help Sasuke, so placing this panel in the conclusion of an arc where Sasuke does everything in his power to help Naruto, feels incredibly full circle.

Full Circle

In the aftermath, Sasuke does what he loves best -- rushing to Naruto’s side and immediately starting with the teasing. His smile has finally returned, as he holds his hand out for Naruto to take.

The cloak that was shown tightly closed moments prior, is now flowing freely. The earlier chapter shows his hair appearing flat and jagged -- weighed down. Next to his beloved, however, it's fluffy and swaying in the wind -- weightless.

Another point of intrigue is how Naruto stares at Sasuke’s extended hand, seeming momentarily shocked. Since, after all, Sasuke is the one enthusiastically initiating intimacy again, like we saw in chapter 1 and was so hesitant and pointedly strained in their interactions preceeding this moment.

Sasuke proceeds to turn things up a hundred notches by so smoothly invoking his pledge to forever stay by Naruto's side, while still holding his hand. To which, Naruto’s speechlessness coupled with the intensely flirty look they exchange really seals the deal on how purely romantic this exchange is.

It ends with Naruto once again repeating those words Sasuke said to him at the very beginning of this arc. This has him smiling before lightheartedly scoffing and affectionately calling Naruto a numb-skull. It's a clear demonstration of not only receiving his feelings, but wholeheartedly reciprocating.

It’s another full-circle moment from their first meeting in the Hokage’s office that ends in the same way. It also really echoes the feel of the cathartic conclusion in chapter 698 where Sasuke lovingly calls Naruto 'usuratonkachi' -- some things never change.

#sns meta #sns analysis #narusasu analysis #sasunaru analysis #narusasu meta #sasunaru meta #narusasu #sasunaru #anti naruhina #anti nh #anti sasusaku #anti ss

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muzetrigger · 4 months ago

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Pluto and “The Black Cat”

I guess it takes a community event for me to actually write out that Pluto post I've been planning for *checks notes* 2 months.

So, let's talk about Pluto (finally)!

By the way, spoilers, so if you're not into that:

We're first introduced to Pluto during the Maze arc, where he's unceremoniously dumped on Duke and Lenore by the Posh Crew, which also includes his roommate Prospero.

At first, it's easy to write Pluto off as kind of an emo soft boi. And in fact, Duke even tries to ditch him during the Acrophobia Trial.

It's not hard to see why. Aesthetically, Pluto has a much darker presentation than the rest of the cast which gives him the impression of a gloomy introvert that won't really contribute anything to the team. He wears a grey turtleneck instead of a white dress shirt which marks him as a visual outcast; his slouching posture projects a lack of confidence; and his eye covering bangs actually do a lot of work to make him appear less communicative (windows to the soul, right?).

On top of that, Pluto's pretty small, a trait emphasized by his overly large jacket, which unlike other students, doesn't seem to be tailored to him, and his prickly personality don't earn him any teamwork points. I mean, just look at him:

The point being, Pluto isn't exactly the image of confidence that Duke and Lenore need in order to muscle through the maze.

That being said, like most great characters, Pluto almost immediately shows he has a lot more going for him than first impressions.

One thing that readers might have noticed is that because Pluto is pretty small and unassuming, he's great at sneaking around.

But since it's mostly played as a gag many people might have also missed this detail right after:

Pluto stepping on a branch isn't mindbogglingly important, but it does speak to his character in a really touching way. He immediately recognizes that his silence upsets Duke and Lenore and goes out of his way to make noise so they aren't startled by him, even though they really haven't been the nicest to him.

It's a small detail, but it shows that right from the beginning, Pluto is someone who cares about other people, which is further reinforced when he tries to break up Duke and Lenore during Duke's ill-conceived attempt to awaken Lenore's spectre:

The maze also highlights a few of Pluto's other positive traits. For example, he's surprisingly interested in etymology (what a dork; I love him), which gives Red an easy way to explain the Greek/Latin roots to the readers while also playing up Pluto's allusion to the Roman god. It also indicates that Pluto is fairly book smart, which is directly contrasted by Duke's street smarts in the Chronophobia trial and Lenore's... instinct? Let's call it intuition.

We also get a bit of foreshadowing for Pluto's spectre. One, he's actually pretty dextrous on a tightrope, and two, he can't swim, both of which are traits stereotypically associated with cats.

Speaking of which, Pluto's spectre:

According to Poppet, Pluto is a Crytid, a type of Spectre that manifests when someone had a deep-seated desire to escape social constraints, but somewhat paradoxically, Pluto is a cat, a domesticated creature.

I'm going to take a small aside to say that cats really aren't that domesticated. I mean yes, who doesn't love tea cup kittens, but cats can return to the wild and they still share most of their genetic code and evolutionary instincts with their untamed counterparts, which can't really be said about dogs.

Okay, back to Nevermore, except I lied, we're actually going back to 1845 when Edgar Allan Poe published "The Black Cat".

If you didn't know (but you probably did. After all, you're reading a Nevermore character analysis), almost every Nevermore character is based on one or more works by EAP. (You can check out their main inspirations in this other post.)

And Pluto's story is "The Black Cat". It isn't one of Poe's most famous works, so you could be forgiven for not knowing about it, but if you have read it, you probably immediately recognized its influence on Pluto.

First, a brief overview of the story: (CW: animal abuse and domestic violence)

Like most Poe short stories, "The Black Cat" is narrated by an insane murderer (that's a tad hyperbolic, but you get the point). Unlike other narrators though, this narrator actually started out somewhat decent.

You see, the narrator used to be a loving husband to a woman that he married early in life. Both of them loved animals, so over the years, they cared for a lot of pets together, including "birds, gold-fish, a fine dog, rabbits, a small monkey, and a cat."

This cat is, of course, the titular Black Cat and his name is Pluto. He's also described as being the narrator's "favorite pet and playmate."

Unfortunately, the narrator is also an alcoholic, and his addiction gradually turns him from a loving and sensitive man into a violent mess. He's able to stave off his alcohol fueled abuse from Pluto for several years, but eventually, Pluto ticks him off and he grabs the cat and purposefully cuts out one of its eyes with a penknife.

Understandably, Pluto (the cat) does not take kindly to this, and for the rest of its life tries to avoid the narrator, which the narrator takes surprisingly well.

At first.

Eventually, his alcoholism catches up with him and he decides that, for literally "no other reason than because he knows he should not" decides to hang the cat.

So, there are a ton of references to the short story in Nevermore. Pluto's dad is a physically abusive drunk who cuts out Pluto's eye, Pluto's name and spectre are inspired by the Black Cat, and the way Pluto unlocks his spectre mirrors how the narrator hangs his pet.

But there are arguably lot more allusions from the rest of the story. You see right after the narrator kills Pluto, his house burns down and there are two characters in Nevermore who are associated with fire:

Lenore and Monty, both of whom have a pretty interesting relationship with Pluto, especially when you line them up with Pluto's short story.

If you associate the narrator's house burning down as karmic retribution, then Lenore is a natural pick. After all, she not only burns down her estate, her presence in Pluto's (after)life is arguably what causes him to start standing up for himself more, and at the very least, her leadership is what gets him through maze for a shot at the second life which dovetails nicely with the fallout of the narrator's house burning.

You see, the narrator doesn't perish along with his material possessions, but one wall of his house also survives, and burned into that wall is the image of a hanging cat, a reminder of his sins.

Soon after, the narrator, still drowning his sorrows and guilt at bars, happens upon a second cat who is "fully as large as Pluto, and closely resembling him in every aspect but one." It's even missing an eye. The only thing that separates it from Pluto is a patch of white hair on its chest.

Now the concept of doubling is one of Poe's hallmarks, and it's mirrored wonderfully in Nevermore by the students' past lives and their current unlife as students, or alternatively, their human form and their spectre form, but it's also symbolically present for Pluto because by leading him out of the maze, Lenore also leads Pluto on the path to a second life in addition to inspiring him to be more confident, which is arguably the difference between his past and current self.

Based on Pluto's memories, it doesn't seem like his father thought of him as a "man" and given his character introduction, Pluto was a meek person. But after meeting Lenore and befriending Duke, Pluto does this:

One, it's hilarious that Pluto is talking about taking eyes, but two, Pluto is fully ready to kill Monty here and that leads me to part two of the fire.

Monty is a self destructive individual. He purposefully instigates fights, loves to stir up trouble for no reason, and suffers from trauma that arguably isn't his fault (not to say that dealing with that trauma isn't his responsibility).

In some ways, he's haunted by his religious upbringing as much as the narrator of "The Black Cat" is by his alcoholism. Both are aware of how much it ruins their lives, but they can't help leaning into those violent tendencies. The narrator even calls his alcoholism a "fiend".

And, they both wall up someone they're rooming with.

Because, there's even more to the new black cat than driving the narrator insane. In fact, the narrator goes as far as murdering his wife while attempting to kill the new Pluto (I can't believe she stuck around, the poor woman).

And like any Poe narrator worth his salt, "The Black Cat" narrator decides to hide the body by walling her up in a false chimney. This comes with the added benefit of scaring the new black cat away so the narrator can finally enjoy some piece and quiet.

Only it turns out this is a lie. Just like Monty narrowly avoiding Pluto's gunshot, the Black Cat's absence turns out to be the narrator's undoing because the narrator accidently walled up the cat with his wife's corpse, and it's the cat's screeching that ultimately unmasks his crimes.

Similarly, it's Pluto's belief in Duke that activates Duke's spectre, "freeing a corpse" and leading to the much needed string of chapters where everyone dunks on Monty. (Thank you, Pluto.)

I think it's really neat that Red managed to blend multiple Poe stories into a new plot thread, and I'm really looking forward to seeing what she and Flynn have in store with Pluto because even though his inspiration story has been pretty much fully acted out, most of spectre abilities really haven't been explored.

For instance, while "unlucky" is a general description of black cats, Pluto's presence has actually been a major boon for the misfits, saving Duke, explaining the thalassophobia trial in the maze, guiding Lenore and Duke through Acrophobia, and also warning Lenore and defending her during the Manor arc. Maybe it's bad luck for his enemies or straight up luck manipulation?

"Blink" could be a reference to Pluto's dash attack, but Pluto also has an uncanny ability to disappear from people's perception as demonstrated during the maze and to a lesser extent when he hides from Eulalie in the forbidden wing.

For those of us into TTRPGs, blink is also sometimes used to refer to teleporting or the DnD spell of the same name with causes the caster to fade in and out of existence!

And finally, "evil eye" is a very intriguing ability. While it could just be a reference to Pluto's missing/remaining eye, as @takescrackseriously and other readers have pointed out, it could also be a reference to Poe's "Telltale Heart" maybe having the ability to drive victims mad, like Pluto's namesake (er, reincarnation?) does in "The Black Cat".

That brings up another question, which is why is Pluto still missing his eye? Lenore was also seriously injured in life, but she isn't crippled like she was post-Theo as a student. What injuries get to be healed and which remain in Nevermore?

I'm interested to see if, like Will's freaky blood wax clones, spectres' powers can develop and how far they can develop. After all, Pluto's power set seems fairly basic, and while I love underdogs (undercats?), ostensibly there's some kind of balancing system that makes traits like "blink" and "teeth" keep up with monsters like "fear itself" and "divine light".

Okay, maybe not given the ruthless nature of the academy and the Raven's comments, but narratively that can feel a bit unsatisfying, y'know? Because it would be such a waste for Pluto's development to stall here despite the amazing amount of progress he's already made.

Plus, aesthetically, I'm willing to bet Flynn is going to incorporate more white into Pluto's character design, because a considerable amount of detail focuses on this one difference between Pluto and the new cat in the short story. In fact, it seems to be one of the factors in the narrator's full descent into madness because he starts seeing the cat's white patch as morphing into the image of a noose.

And to close out this really lengthy post on a bright note, have some terrified Pluto:

What a cutie. We must protect him at all costs.

By the way, if you enjoyed my rambling, here are links to similar theory/analysis posts talking about Ada and Annabel!

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kurokawaia · 1 year ago

Text

❛ He's Unexperienced ❜

Postwar!Virgin!Uchiha Sasuke X fem!Reader

WC; 2.6k+ | ! MDNI ! | TW/CW; afab reader, she/her pronouns, oral -> male receiving, blowjob, experienced reader, reader is the dom here, reader is playful and flirty, PIV, PWP, riding, grinding, fem!dom x male!sub

⋆·˚ ༘ *𝑅𝐸𝒬𝒰𝐸𝒮𝒯 :: (filled request) Hello :) l have a new request for Sasuke again , can you please write first time with Sasuke , like he is a virgin ( sorry I have a virgin kink :,) and reader has some experience. Like they liked each other in the academy days and were together in team 7 but after he left the village reader tried forgetting him by going out with other boys . Could you please make reader soft Dom and flirty / playful , you can make them in his baddie arc or postwar (whatever you want) , sorry I am demanding too much details but this is what came to my mind :)) - @enouche

honey's a/note :: I have made sure to add your two other requests into this, the morning after and the bj :) -> req2 req3, THIS WAS LONGER THAN I MEANT IT TO BE LMAOOO

m.list | naruto/boruto m.list | uchiha m.list

It had been several years since Sasuke left the village, pursuing his own path of vengeance. For {Y/n}, his departure had left a void that seemed impossible to fill.

She hadn't bothered to help in bringing him back, she didn't want to, it was his choice, right?

Before Sasuke came back she was filled with an empty feeling, a need to forget. She would walk through Konoha, her mind drifting back to the days she spent with Sasuke. The memories were bittersweet; She had loved him deeply, but that love had turned into a painful reminder of what could never be.

{Y/n} began to seek sex in the company of others. She dated different men, hoping to find a connection that could help her forget Sasuke. With each relationship, she gained more experience in all aspects, love, what to give, sex, learning about herself and what she wanted from a partner. However, none of them could truly replace the space Sasuke had left in her heart.

Her first relationship after Sasuke departed was with Kenta.

Next was Hirosh.

Then there was Daichi.

One evening, as {Y/n} strolled through the village, she felt a familiar presence. Her heart skipped a beat, and she turned to see Sasuke standing there. He had returned.

"Sasuke," she whispered.

He approached her slowly, his expression unreadable. "{Y/n}," he replied softly. "It's been a long time."

They stood in silence, the weight of their shared past hanging heavily between them. Finally, Y/N found the courage to speak. "Why are you here?"

"I've finished what I needed to do," Sasuke said, his gaze never leaving hers. "I've come back to make amends. Naruto brought me back."

{Y/n}'s heart ached at his words. She had spent so long trying to move on, yet seeing him again brought all her feelings rushing back. "I... I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything," Sasuke replied, taking a step closer. "I know I've hurt you. And I understand if you can't forgive me."

Tears welled up in {Y/n}'s eyes. "Sasuke, you left a hole in my heart that no one else could fill. I've tried to move on, but..."

Sasuke gently wiped away her tears, his touch sending shivers down her spine. "I never stopped thinking about you, {Y/n}. I realized too late what I had lost."

{Y/n} looked into his eyes, searching for the truth in his words. She could see the sincerity, the regret, and the hope. "Sasuke," she began, her voice trembling, "I don't know if we can go back to what we were. But maybe we can start anew."

A small, rare smile appeared on Sasuke's face. "I'd like that."

The weeks passed in a blur of shared moments and tentative steps toward rebuilding your relationship. You and Sasuke spent your days training together, reminiscing about the past, and forging new memories. With each passing day, your bond grew stronger, the wounds of the past slowly healing.

One evening, as you sat on the rooftop of your apartment, watching the stars, an unspoken tension filled the air. The closeness you shared had become undeniable, the unaddressed feelings bubbling just beneath the surface.

"Sasuke," you began, your voice barely above a whisper, "do you ever think about... us?"

Sasuke turned to you, his gaze intense and unwavering. "Every day," he admitted. "I think about what we could have been, and what we could still be."

Heart pounding, you took a deep breath. "I've been trying to forget you, to move on. But no matter how hard I try, you're always there, in my heart."

Sasuke reached out, gently cupping your face in his hand. "I've made mistakes, {Y/n}. But if you'll have me, I want to make things right. I want us to have a future."

Tears filled your eyes, but this time, they were tears of hope. "I want that too, Sasuke."

Without another word, Sasuke closed the distance between you, capturing your lips in a kiss that was both tender and passionate. It was a kiss that spoke of years of longing and unspoken feelings, a kiss that promised a new beginning.

As your lips parted, you gazed at each other, breathless and full of emotion. Sasuke's hand slid down to your waist, pulling you closer, and you responded in kind, wrapping your arms around his neck.

Your kisses grew more intense, fueled by the pent-up desire and the deep connection you shared. Sasuke's hand roamed your back, his touch sending shivers down your spine. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer still.

Time seemed to stand still as you made out under the starry sky, the world around you fading away. In that moment, nothing else mattered—only the love you had rediscovered and the promise of a future together.

As you finally pulled away, both breathless and flushed, you rested your forehead against Sasuke's. "I'm glad you're back," you whispered.

Sasuke smiled, a genuine smile that lit up his face. "So am I, {Y/n}. So am I."

"Sasuke..." you asked slowly, "I..."

"What is it?" he asked, confused.

You press your lips against his once more, your tongue slipping into his mouth causing a surprised groan to leave his mouth into your own. The arm wrapped around your waist tightened, pulling you closer to him.

Pulling away from his mouth, your hands place themselves onto his chest, nails lightly scratching his covered skin, skin that you so desperately wanted to see. "Can we fuck, please," you ask, a flirty undertone in your voice.

Sasuke's eyes widen, not knowing what to say. "If you don't want to-"

"I haven't done anything like this before," Sasuke replied, a soft pink hue coating his pale cheeks and you let a soft smirk spread onto your plump lips.

"Well," you say, whispering into his ear. "Good thing you have me here to help you out with that."

"Have you..." he trailed off slowly, unsure what to ask you, not wanting you to feel offended.

"I have had sex before, Sasuke," you reply swiftly and you could see Sasuke's jaw clench. "Only because I wanted to forget you," you reassured. "But you have me all to yourself now."

Sasuke let out a hum before he forwardly gripped your hair and smashed his lips against yours, wanting to hear the soft mewls that escaped your mouth previously when you two kissed.

A gasp left your mouth. Not only from the sensation of Sasuke kissing you with a new fervour but his bulge was prominent in his slacks, pressing against your soaked cunt. "Sasuke," you breathed out against his lips. "I-Inside," you smirk.

And then, you two messily made your way to the bed. You discarded Sasuke's shirt and slacks while you were left in a softly laced bra and plain panties. You pushed Sasuke to the bed and sat onto his lap, tongue entangling with his once more while Sasuke didn't know what to do.

You were experienced, he thought, and he wasn't. He had no choice but to let you and your forward, flirty demeanour to take over every single inch of his body, a dull sense of pleasure coursing through his veins. But, the more you continued to make Sasuke groan against your lips the more the pleasure was growing stronger in his body.

"Can I touch you?" you asked, breathing heavily.

Sasuke's head lolls back against the bed head, a lump being swallowed evidently in his throat, and the sight make you swell while your nipples perked underneath the lacy fabric. "Yeah," he replied, a his hand running through his hair.

My eyes lit up and I slipped his boxers down, his thick and long length hitting his abs. A hiss leaves his mouth at the contact. You held the base of his cock with one hand while your other hand went for his throbbing tip, Sasuke jerked at the sensation, a shaky hand covering his mouth.

Your fingers continued the play with the pre-cum spilling from his slit before the flat of your tongue slide slowly up the underside of his shaft, feeling the veins that rippled up to the head of his cock.

Sasukes head was thrown back but his eyes remained on yours, your eyes looking up at him, innocent and doe, although, Sasuke now knows what you truly are capable of. Sasuke continued to cover his mouth with his hand which made you pout.

"Sasuke," you called, letting your tongue leave his swollen length which caused a deep sigh to leave his mouth. You pull his hand away from his mouth and guided it to your hair, making him wrap his fingers around the tousles of your hair. "You being quite quiet, but I wanna hear all the sounds lave your mouth, 'kay?" you continued in a gentle tone, a smirk interlaced with your voice in the process.

But all that Sasuke could do was finally let out a groan when the hand that was gripping his base slid up and down slowly, sliding effortlessly due to his slick that beaded at his tip. You felt his grip loosen around your hair. "Ah ah," you hum to him caused him to let out an annoyed sigh, clearly he wasn't aware that he could make any sort of those lewd noises.

Mellos head was thrown back while a deep groan emitted from his lips while his grip tightened in my hair. My fingers played with the slit of his shaft, spreading the precum that spilled from his swollen tip causing a hiss to leave his mouth.

Finally taking his throbbing length into your mouth, your tongue swirling around his pink tip before you made your way down his cock. Trying to take him as deep as you could without gagging. You used one of your hands to jerk the rest you couldn't possibly take down. Your other hand slayed on his lower abdomen.

Groans left Sasuke pretty lips, and they get more frequent when you take him further into your hot and slick mouth. "Such pretty sounds," you say as you lift yourself from his length before going down again, wanting to feel his come spill in your mouth, wanting to feel how his body will jerk and tremble under your touch.

Sasuke began to move your head through the tuffs of your hair, and you hummed in content, feeling so happy that he was finally having some dominance over you. You loved how you were almost gagging on his length, but you still wanted more of him.

Tears began to well in you eyes at the pace and gagging at every hit. HIs eyes widen at the sight of your doe eyes spilling with tears as you took him in your sloppy mouth. Sasuke sped up the pace of his movements, causing more tears to spill from your eyes. He lets out a chocked moan as you hollowed your cheeks which caused him to falter in his advances. His load spills into your mouth as he pulls away from you.

You instinctively let the sticky load spill from your mouth, letting the white liquid fall onto the bed beside you. Wiping your mouth you straddle Sasukes lap. His eyes were closed and was breathing heavily before his eyes snapped open at his dick being clenched by something again, but walls that were softer and tighter.

“Fuck, Sasuke... So big,” you moan, feeling the thick, lengthy cock split you open. A moan rasped from Sasukes mouth as you sunk yourself down onto his cock, still hard and throbbing. Your eyes lit up at the sound, the noise going straight to your gummy walls. A pleasured sigh leaves your mouth while Sasuke's hand went straight to your hip, gripping your plump flesh.

Your hands splayed themselves on his abs as you were now flush against his abdomen. A moan leaves your lips as his cock was perfectly hitting that soft, gummy spot inside your cunt. No words left Sasukes mouth but he absolutely loved the feeling of your hot walls tightly squeeze his dick, the words replaced by the groans and moans that he found out, you loved to hear.

"Sasuke," you breath out, beginning to move your hips, moving up and down the full length of his cock. Your clit grinds down against his abdomen, adding extra tingles to shoot through your body.

"{Y/n} please," Sasuke groans, his hand gripping your hip tighter.

"Huh?" you smirk with a humoured tone, struggling to keep up with the pleasure and converse with him at the same time. "Do you want to come?"

"Yeah," he replies breathlessly.

"Where, love? Inside? I'm not opposed," you giggle.

Sasuke's hips jerk up into your own, causing your body to fall forward and his arm wraps around you back as he fucks into your body, moans spilling from your mouth. Sasuke and you pound int each others, moans and chant of each others names spilling from the two of your mouths.

Sasuke squishes himself deeply inside you, a loud groan slipping from his mouth as his come spills thickly inside your now full womb. You came at the same time and there was a creamy ring of your mixed comes around his softening lenght.

You slide yourself off and you let out a soft whine before pressing your lips against his, his tongue slipping into your mouth.

"I love you, Sasuke," you say against his lips.

"I love you," he replied, love coaxed in his pupil blown eyes.

The kitchen was filled with the delicious aroma of freshly prepared food, mingling with the lingering warmth of their recent closeness. Sasuke stood behind you, his arms wrapped around your waist as you both leaned against the counter. His breath was hot against your ear, sending shivers down your spine.

"I want you again," Sasuke murmured, his voice low and husky. He tightened his grip on your waist, pulling you closer to him.

You chuckled softly, turning your head to meet his gaze. "We need to eat, Sasuke. The food's getting cold."

His dark eyes bore into yours, a smirk playing on his lips. "I don't mind if it gets a little colder."

You playfully swatted his arm. "Come on, we can continue later. Besides, you need to keep up your strength," you teased, reaching for a plate of food.

Sasuke sighed, his grip loosening slightly. "You're right. But don't think I'm letting you off the hook that easily."

You smiled, handing him a plate. "I wouldn't dream of it."

Do not copy, steal, modify, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.

m.list | naruto/boruto m.list | uchiha m.list

taglist :: @enouche @lovelyandproblematic

@sugu-love @why-are-you-still-awake

#sasuke x fem!reader #sasuke x reader #sasuke x you #sasuke smut #sasuke x reader smut #naruto smut #naruto x reader #afab reader #sasuke x fem!reader smut

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hvnlygrl · 7 months ago

Note

i have been thinking about this sm lately but stalker! bellamy blake that is always watching reader just admiring her etc. maybe they find out

⌞ TREES ⌝

જ⁀➴ pairing | stalker!bellamy blake x fem!reader

જ⁀➴ word count | 1.0k

જ⁀➴ warnings | stalker!bellamy, some sexual themes but nothing crazy.

જ⁀➴ synopsis | bellamy’s had eyes for you since the day he saw you, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you always see him.

જ⁀➴ notes | ughhh i love this sm this is gonna be a lil blurb :) sorry this took so long i was dealing with finals and then a funeral so ive been a little MIA.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

you’re sunbathing right off the edge of this beautiful boulder-looking rock. it’s around 1-ish according to the watch that you have lying atop your pile of clothes. in nothing but a pair of panties, you lie on your stomach so that your back can tan evenly.

it’s nice. it’s nice to be able to feel the warmth of real sunlight on your skin and the wind through your hair. hear the breeze through the leaves above you and listen to the stream flow alongside you.

there’s something so serene about it. something so sacred about finally having a place where you could be truly alone. on the arc that wasn’t even a dream, it was an impossibility. there was always someone watching or some guard coming around to do routine checks.

bellamy sits on the branch of a tree, not too high up but high enough that you won’t notice him right away. his dark hair blocks his view just the slightest bit and he swipes it away, his hands sweaty from his nervousness. he’d never seen anyone as beautiful as you. it was like he was looking at an angel and he never wanted to stop. but it was the innocence you held in your solitude that he loved. he was nervous just looking at you, and he knew it was wrong, he felt horrible doing it, but he couldn’t ever stop himself from climbing up that tree 15 minutes before he knew you’d head to the rock.

bellamy was your best friend around the base, always laughing and cracking jokes. it was like he was the most confident when he was next to you, but he couldn’t tell you how he truly felt. he was far too afraid to mess things up between you. it was all so perfect when he was with you, he couldn’t risk making you feel uncomfortable.

it’s ironic, really, he knows. how he won’t ask you on a date but he’ll sit in a tree for 2 hours just watching you sunbathe naked (or damn close to it), and sing and read the same 3 books over and over again. your own perfect little rituals that were all yours.

you hum a tune, hey jude by the beatles. it’s what your mother sang when you were a kid, one of the only songs that stuck throughout the years. your nose is buried in this old book that you found one day in the library on the arc: Divergent.

it reminded you a lot of your own life, as if you resonated with tris in many ways and you couldn’t help but attach bellamy to four’s character. he was hot, protective, and held this air about him that could command an army.

you thought about bellamy often when you weren’t next to him, and many times he appeared into your dreams night after night. sometimes it was the two of you in this big beautiful house with kids and pets, other times it was much more devious, with the two of you sneaking away to hide on the drop ship, your hands down his pants and his grabbing and caressing you.

you especially thought about him while sitting atop your rock. part of you wanted to invite him sometime, but were too afraid he wouldn’t feel the same way.

bellamy’s breath catches in his throat and his jeans suddenly become two sizes too small when you flip onto your back, placing your book face down on your clothes next to you. you close your eyes, face turned toward the sunlight.

his boot slips, breaking a tiny branch off to the side of the one he’s perched on.

your eyes shoot open, hand immediately reaching for the gun bellamy had given you when he found out you were making these daily trips alone. “in case of grounders,” he huffed when you raised a brow at him suspiciously.

your hand grips the handle of the gun, finger pressed along the side of trigger. it’s probably nothing, right?

you don’t bother throwing your shirt on, if it is a grounder you won’t have the time to. it’s far too risky.

your eyes scan the tree line, looking for anything out of place.

bellamy holds his breath, his heart in his throat. what if you shoot him on accident before realizing it’s him? how would he explain that to the rest of the 100?

and thats’s when you see it, the glimmer of his necklace against his tan chest. his big clunky boots and all-black outfit.

“bell?” you’re embarrassed and confused and suddenly feeling so exposed. “what the hell?”

he climbs off of his branch, dropping down about 10 feet. “hey, y/n,” he breathes out. “i-uh”

“were you watching me?”

he pauses. everything in him wants to lie or come up with some excuse but he can’t. he can’t lie to you. “yea. i’m sorry. i don’t-“

“do you like me?” you cut him off. now’s your chance, you figure, considering you’re already basically naked.

“i love you, y/n,” he bites at the inside of his cheek, “i have for a while now. i didn’t know how to tell you, i was too scared to screw it up.”

bellamy steps toward you, his eyes fluttering back and forth between your chest and your eyes.

“you love me?” you choke out, eyes wide. “are you being serious right now, bellamy?”

“as a heart attack.”

“holy shit,” you blink in shock. you can’t believe that in a million years the bellamy blake would be in love with you.

he stands there awkwardly, like he can’t tell if you’re happy or freaking out in a bad way.

“i love you too, bell,” you smile at him, waving your hands at him to beckon him closer. “c’mere.”

he drops down next to you, his hand raising to cup your cheek, fingers slightly trembling with trepidation. you inch toward him, big doe eyes fluttering at him as you take in all the features of his face as if it were the first time again.

he leans in, initiating the first kiss, his soft lips fitting perfectly with yours as your hands begin unbuttoning his shirt.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

hvnlygrl 2025 ©️

#bellamy blake #bellamy blake fanfic #bellamy blake fanfiction #bellamy blake smut #🗡️ the 100 #fanfic #fanfiction #smut #bellamy blake x reader

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misschue · 1 month ago

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Major Apothecary diaries manga and LN spoilers ahead...

So I've been thinking. We know TAD has a tendency to do some heavy foreshadowing like they did with the locust plague. So many volumes of build up where they talk about crickets, ways of harvesting, etc. to finally end up in the long awaited locust invasion.

And I'm sure is headed that way with the pox too. Suddenly characters who had the pox start appearing and talks of a way to handle it come up more often.

But what I'm also sure is we're getting major foreshadowing for Jinshis eventually finding out about his real parents AND abdicating in favor of his younger brother. In the last volume we have not one but two examples of former royals who resigned their duties and went on to live their lives. The Shin Clan founder who was so beloved he was allowed to keep a heirloom in the form of a dragon and Kada, also an emperor's son who was casted away for commiting a terrible taboo (but still allowed to live).

I think the Shin Clan guy it's how's most likely to go. This was a beloved son, a crown prince!, but he didn't consider himself adequate and preferred his younger brother ruled instead. Right now Jinshi feels safe being just a younger brother and having two healthy baby nephews. But his entire parentage is one huge Chekhov's gun waiting to be fired. You don't put that out there if you're not planning to reveal it at some point. Especially bringing into equation the factions and the dislike for the current heir. Someone somehow it's gonna figure Jinshi is the emperors son and bring it to light, causing at least two volumes of trouble.

But the Shin Clan example is already giving us a way out. IT IS possible to just resign. I think it will take a lot of courage but Jinshi will finally end up doing it, with no major negative consequences to him.

It's also worth noting that times passes really fast in the light novel. Gyokuyou and Lihuas sons aren't that far from being 7 years old, the moment a baby is consider old enough to not worry about dying suddenly. They were born when Maomao was 18ish and she's now 21!

Obviously this is all volumes ahead, I think we'll see the pox arc first and based on a few spoilers of the web novel some other issues first but I don't doubt Jinshis parents reveal will come eventually

#the apothecary diaries #kusuriya no hitorigoto #knh spoilers #kusuriya no hitorigoto ln #maomao #jinshi #gyokuyou #knh

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startedwellthatsentence · 19 days ago

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Finale spoilers

THEY. ARE. THE. SAME. PERSON.

Same brain on the same wavelength. Complete nonverbal communication — they just GET each other. Gurathin knows how to find it, knows how it feels, knows what it needs, because it IS him in so many ways.

(Side note: Gura linking up with his textually queer ex-hookup (in a drug and potentially also sexual context) and seeing that the guy has a kid and using that to exploit the kid’s dad to give him access to illicit data was MAGNIFICENT.)

On a metaphorical note that the show pushed SO FAR and I would love for fic to explore even farther,

Gurathin took ALL OF MB INSIDE OF HIMSELF. To great physical and mental detriment. EVERY PIECE OF DATA THAT COMPRISED MB’S NON-ORGANIC MEMORY WAS INSIDE OF GURATHIN’S AUGMENTS. For an undisclosed amount of time.

Now, in a story in which these were two separate people, that might lead to weird things like personality bleed, uncomfortable memories that don’t quite fit, etc. But they spent 10 episodes hammering home just how much (the TV versions of) Gurathin and Murderbot ARE the same person. How long would it take for you to notice that you have integrated parts of yourself that didn’t originate in your current body, when they match so well that they’re indistinguishable from your normal digital memory.

MB hums the theme tune to a serial that he realizes he’s never downloaded, because it’s actually a docuseries he’d never willingly watch. Gurathin reaches for a memory of something that happened in the first few weeks planetside and sees HIMSELF in the memory and gets vertigo. The possibilities are endless.

((Also also — there is a difference in the story between the books, where predominantly MB saves itself, and the show, where they save each other. Does it undercut its self-actualization arc, or does it highlight the kind of altruistic interdependence that the Preservation Alliance stands for and that we need to see more of in western media? And how does the fact that the main narrative parallels are on different sides of the saving play into that?))

Either way — I’m fucking STOKED for season two. I cannot wait for them to show us MB meeting its actual real life SOULMATE and them immediately fucking just … swatting at each other like two bitchy cats forced to share the same space. Forcibly grooming each other while they both try to pretend to appear like one single augmented human and ROYALLY fucking that up every step of the way. Two raccoons in a trenchcoat thinking they’re secret agents when they’re just highly dangerous trash goblins. CAN’T. WAIT.

#Murderbot #Murderbot tv #MBTV #TMBD #gurathin #perihelion #murderbot tv spoilers #murderathin

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madonnamadeofasphalt · 8 months ago

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EA & Bioware honestly did an incredible job at killing any enthusiasm I had for a new Dragon Age. Fucking hell, man, I've played the first two games so much I could probably go through them with closed eyes and still pick all the right dialogue options to get My Exact Personally Canonized Plot. And the only reason I didn't do the same thing with DA:I is because it was made after EA completely gave up on optimizing their shit so the fucking thing takes up like a billion terabytes of disc space and takes 10 hours to download and install. I honestly think it's the best-written cRPG franchise to ever have a budget that doesn't involve a list of Kickstarter backers or getting an eccentric Estonian billionaire fixated on the project. And the gameplay is also there, I don't really care about that part.

Then they proceeded to fire all the talent that made me love those first three games, and scratch and restart the production twice, and be suspiciously cagey with any details or gameplay footage for a fucking decade, so my hype consistently went down and down. And yet I still managed to hold out some hope that somehow, by some miracle, it wouldn't fucking suck.

I kept that hope until the trailer dropped. You know the one. The one where we see a bearded Varric. This, I think, was the exact moment when I lost any desire to play fucking Veilguard.

Like, first of all, Varric being there at all is already an issue. Leave the man alone. His presence was already kinda forced in DA:I. And after DA:I and Tresspasser, his story couldn't be more finished if he got killed, eaten, shitted out, condemned to hell, redeemed by divine sacrifice, bathed for eternity in the everlasting light. There is no point to Varric anymore. Whatever arc they've given him in Veilguard, and I don't even give a shit enough to read the spoilers before writing this post, it has no business existing. Fuck you. The only reason he's there is because he's a recognizable IP, and when you're a certain kind of soulless corporate moron, you think there's nothing more important than putting a recognizable IP in whatever new bullshit you're trying to peddle. Maybe if you didn't fire every decent writer in your trash fucking company, you'd have someone to tell you about the importance of Ending The Fucking Story When The Story Fucking Ends.

But that's not even the core of the problem. Beard? they gave Varric a Beard? Varric I fucking hate everything that's even tangentially connected to dwarven culture with a passion which is why I've made a point to shave my beard all my life to spite anyone who gives a fuck about it Tethras? beard? you gave him a beard? He changed so much offscreen in the goddamn timeskip between these two games that he got a motherfucking berd? fucshhfdbeard? feadsgfsvarricafgfdh BEARD? yyousftoiuslyhhabevarricasgsfucningbeardandthivkimgosabedineditit?beard????

PS. (edit after finding out spoilers) I've gone to TV Tropes to read up on Varric's role in DATV after writing this (just in case I'm wrong and dumb, and there's actually a deeply compelling narrative reason for his presence), and, well, this shit is cheaper than I thought. And more importantly, just as I thought, there appears to be no justification for the beard beyond "adding a beard is a cliche way to show that a bunch of time has passed, and we didn't care enough to think this shit through". I'm fucking tired, man.

PPS. (edit after reading the rest of big spoilers) This is so much worse than I could even begin to suspect. This is worse than the final season of Game of Thrones. This is the final season of Game of Thrones if they straight-up fired GRRM, burned his notes and hired a showrunner who's only read a one-page summary of the first six seasons. This is fucking depressing, man. I'm genuinely fucking sad. So many subplots that were started over the course of these three games, that were clearly going somewhere, scrapped in favour of a simplistic good vs. evil story that would get rejected by fucking CD-Projekt in 2007 for being too basic. All because the artists who poured their hearts and souls into this bullshit franchise got thrown out like trash by its "owners". Morrigan's kid, the Well of Sorrows, all the implied complexities of Tevinter politics, the Crows, the Old Gods, Andraste. All went to shit. Death to capitalism.

#veilguard critical #datv critical #datv #dragon age the veilguard #dragon age critical #dragon age #my words

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alligatorcarapace · 21 days ago

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I wanna talk about the tmnt 2003 timeline, can we talk about the 03 timeline?

Because I was refamiliarizing myself with Fast Forward and for some reason the turtles claimed they were 15. And I know that's not right. Since we see in season 3 Christmas pass and then in season 4 Halloween pass so clearly their at least 16 by this point and then I started really thinking about the timeline. I mean really thinking about it.

And then I realized, wait wait wait, there might be even more time passing.

So come with me on this rabbit hole I went into!

See when Leo get's knocked into a coma and they go to the farm house the first time there's snow everywhere. But when they get back to NYC there's no snow.

And you might be like "What if in this world NYC just doesn't have a lotta snow or the farm house is just very snowy" to which I point out we've seen NYC get a lot of snow multiple times through out the snow. The big one being that Christmas episode, and we've seen the farm house in sunny weather; that's what season 4's time appeared to be in.

So clearly a lot of time has past.

Between all those facts and the fact that Leo & Raph were reforging swords in the barn(Why did Casey's grandma need a forge in her barn???? Cause it had to have been her since her hubby was out train robbing apparently. The Jones family was doomed to tangle with crime from the start, even alternative dimensions where Casey hate's fighting he's still entangled with The Law Tm) They must've had their first Christmas at the farm house. Now if that happened while Leo was knocked out, depressed, or sword making I'll leave up to the whump writers, but still make note of that.

Then the we get the finally of season 1 which appears to be the longest day ever followed by, at most, a week of Splinter Searching becuase the Utrom Council are Obtuse assholes who could've saved a lot of headaches by speaking to the family of the medical patience. I like to headcanon that a lot of bureaucracy held down Mortu from talking. Like I just know that the level of secrecy they operate under is just The Worst about getting things done fast.

The whole Tricerion arc either happened within one day or there's some weird time dilation going on where it was multiple days for the turtles but one earth day for the the human side of things. Frankly this part is too scary for me to touch, I'll let astrophysics-heads tackle that.

Now next time we have a notable change in time, is as I keep talking about, out beloved Klunk Debut. Christmas is here and so that's two years since the gang met April.

Assuming their birth/mutation day already happened before they met April and they were 15 during season 1, this would make them a guaranteed 16 years old.

We love to see it, they're about to go through The Horrors.

Now I can't think of any big weather/time moments in season 3 cause the pacing is quick and decisive here, so I am cutting past the death of Shredder to Halloween. Ya boys are trick or treating, hell is being casually opened by some nobody, and this is the most whimsy I've seen from Raph and Don who are purposely fucking with Leo a little bit more than Mikey this episode, I love them so much.

But all good things make a weird fucking conclusion.

Scion of the Shredder canonically is two months after Leo leaves. Halloween was right before Samurai Tourist, and yet there's no winter here.

So there's a big time gap, but I am not sure when.

Most likely I would assume they had the most mentally unwell Christmas and Samurai Tourist was in the later parts of Spring when the snow has melted.

Either way happy New Years, the boys are going to be to turning 17 in the upcoming year.

Btw I was wondering if there is any mention of the passing between Scion and Prodigal Son, there is none. Whomp whomp. Feel free to share how little or how lot time passed based on Donny's injuries and Mikey's cat food supply.

Here where things get fuzzy.

Cause clearly time passes during the Good Genes arc, however I am not sure if they ever drop exactly how much time. But there's at least 6 episodes, and we know that Donny's little adventure with April to find her uncle is like two to three days so over a week, I'll prolly say between that and the other nonsense we got around a month at most of time.

Basically nothing note worthy other than it tells us that all of season 5 takes place during the summer.

Once again season 5 have vague showing of time passing without exact numbers being thrown around but still. We can tell time passes and that's important to keep in mind when we get back here.

Either way, that means the 15 years old thing is hilarious wrong by these calculations. I mean even if you go by the canon stated and not implied stuff they're still 16. Which why would they lie about that lmao??? My personal belief in my pet theory on brain scrambling has only been strengthened. Either that or for some reason the turtle's are engaging in Lies Your Older Cousin Tells You and Master Splinter just let's them.

Tbh based on slider and other common turtle mating and hatching seasons, there's a good chance their birthday has passed and they're 17 but idk if you want to factor that in and instead do guessing on where their mutation day is instead. Frankly after going down this rabbit hole figuring out their mutation day seems scary if there's not some sort of date to staple it to. Like the death of Hamato Yoshi or something.

But wait!!!

This is not where the timeline shenanigans stop.

So here's where things get wild. Because time did not just stop becuase they got zapped to the future and we meet Cody Jones. Meaning while our mutated crew are aging, their dear human friends are not.

So let's talk height. (I promise this is relevant)

See unless you have some sort of growth hormone, you're getting at most like an inch or two every couple months. Even with irregular growth you're getting, let's say 7 inches, within one year is quiet taxing on the biggest of growing teenage boys.

As I said this is all very relevant to the 03 timeline, you need to just hang with me for a second.

Now the 03 series, even after the redesign, still was very good about heights. Maybe not weight, but their heights always looked like their heights.

Like you see Cody next to Don and you're like yeah that's what 5'1 one looks next to 5'6. Or you see Cody and Mikey and you're like yeah that's what 5'1 and 5'3 look like:

So everything checks out right?

Well, you see, here's thing; Back To The Sewer did another redesign forever involved and thought they were being funny with what they did for the heights.

Now the main cast for the most part stayed the same with their heights as being 5'5(Leo), 5'6(Don), 5'7(Raph), with only Mikey gaining one inch and becoming 5'4.

So Don right next to Cody should be around the same height in BTTS... Right?

WELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

These images exists:

WHY IS THE BABY BOY SO TALL??? HE STARTED OUT TURNING 14 AT THE BEGINING OF THIS SEASON????????

So a bit of a growth spurt has happened and now that preamble about height on this segment makes more sense.

He's shot up from 5'1 to a height never officially given, however eyeballing it I'd say he's like 5'9ish, maybe a bit more than that, but hey ho he's now taller than Raph.

As I said even if something medically crazy happened, to get this height you'd need around a year, maybe 7 months if we're lowballing and assuming he's just sore all the time in FF. So for the sake of rounding, happy birthday Cody you're 15 now.

Which means that puts the turtles based on the timeline I've been building at 18(Even with the lowball estimate 'cause they left in summer), however it's only been a couple months for their humans so there's now a weird time difference so the once 5 year difference between the humans and turtles becomes a 4 year, which is just mean to people who already have issues with math.

But yeah other than that, I am not sure if there's any more big moments of timeline.

Like I guess we could talk about Mrs. Jones's sliver streaks in her now grey hair in contrast with the last time we saw her in season season 4 having pure dark hair meaning a good bit of time has past between the beginning of season 4 and the end of the final season, so my season 5 was all summer (around 4 months) theory might be true because BTTS isn't that long with it being only about a couple months at most, unless there's some time skip that happens that I am forgetting.

So that means it's at best ending the year with a fall wedding with boys being around 18 and April&Casey at 22ish(We don't have their birthdays beside their shared year of 1980 if the wiki's right and I am scared to look for any source).

Turtles Forever looks to be happing next year as we're skipping winter again, becuase snow's the worst to animate and makes the timeline less ambiguous.

Assuming their birthdays have already past, post canon that would put them around 19 and 26.

Tune in next time when I calculate rat years to figure out how old Splinter is, assuming that he's an adult because he was mutated as one therefore we're gonna figure out his "human age" from that.

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morialoe17 · 3 months ago

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aloe Yap Corner: 괴담출근 Part 1 Ch.208

Finally have my thoughts processed and here's what I think about chapter 208 (SPOILERS)

While DER is an apocalyptic world, it hasn't reached its conclusion yet, right? Contributors are still continuing to add onto the world's lore and all

Then what if... because of Soleum possessing whatever amalgamation Daydream/Cheerful Research Institute made, the apocalypse arc finally kickstarts? Like, he ends up becoming the key to the start of it.

And if he didn't possess the current body he has now, maybe it would've taken longer to or would never happen in the first place?

What if "Ireum/Name" is actually only just a place holder, and Daydream, who knew nothing and only based their experiments from surface knowledge of the Luminous Church's beliefs, ended up tapping on dangerous territory and accidentally created a supposed 'Ireum-nim' through irregular/incorrect means--resulting to an anomaly and start the apocalypse. If this is the case, maybe this arc will start with the formal introduction to the cult and significant figure from it.

Who knows, maybe this would result in a conflict between the Luminous Church and Daydream, and the Bureau would end up doing the damage control. If the Bureau does interfere, I'd assume Hyunmu Team 1 would be leading it.

As for the end scene of the chapter, someone pointed out on twt to reread chapter 50.

Here's an excerpt from the two chapters:

Chapter 208:

The body bulges out.

The tattoo is falling off.

I disappear. The human body disintegrates.

The self that has realized the truth rejects the form of the human body. The body tries to return to its original form.

A strange. bizarre, composite image of something unknown burst out from within me.

Scales and horns, hooves, thorns, piercing ribs.

Chapter 50:

The staff member looked at me briefly, then reached over to the desk and picked up something.

A post-it note.

Have a good evening.

'So they're surprisingly sociable, huh?'

Soleum mentions in this chapter the similarity of him using a post-it-note to converse when he first met Jaekwan.

"Thank you."

I bowed politely. The entirely black-clad desk worker gave me a slight nod in retum and stepped back to sit down at their desk.

The shattered fragments of what appeared to be the medium of the Darkness, likely some kind of glass, sparkled on the broken floor.

In the reflection of the shards, I briefly noticed the shadow of the staff member's leg twist unnaturally. making their foot appear like a cloven hoof...

...and then retum to a normal human form.

With the way the worker was described, and how Soleum found it to be similar to him, it's as if this was intended to be significant--a foreshadowing.

Then, did Soleum meet his version of self from ch208 in ch50? That's the confusing part.

The thing is, some readers interpretation of what happened with Soleum's wish is that it transported him through time and space, while others think he just got teleported. Personally, I think it's the former.

Chapter 206:

"Anyway, even if I went further underground... the same office hallway kept repeating Itself...." "Was it the exact same hallway?" "Yes. Same office. The structure, even the scratches were the same, so it's the same place, but... just a bit...the time zone seemed different.

This was Soleum's conversation with J3 about his investigation about the Cheerful Research Institute.

I'm led to think that the time within that space is warped, and since that place was considered a darkness from how Brown could talk to Soleum, it was possible that a force allowed him to see and interact with this version of himself, albeit without him knowing it's actually him.

But with how confusing it is, it's hard to determine if that really is the case or something else entirely. We can only rely on the release of the next part to know...

#괴담에 떨어져도 출근을 해야 하는구나 #괴담출근 #gsgw #kim soleum #gsgw spoilers #gsgw theories #gsgw ch.208

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jetii · 1 month ago

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Event Horizon

Chapter Forty-One: Impedance

Chapter WC: 10,077

Chapter Tags/Warnings: a certain character appears that deserves his own warning, actually multiple characters

A/N: Every time I start writing one of these author's notes I feel the need to start off apologizing. But you know what, I'm not sorry. I love drama.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Join the Taglist | Masterlist

Coruscant, 20 BBY

It takes four days before the Oracle reaches Coruscant.

Four days of rest and recovery, and four days of waiting.

Waiting for the ship to arrive.

Waiting for the Council to summon you.

You've been on edge, unable to sit still, and Wise has had to threaten you with sedatives several times. The only thing keeping you from going insane is the few minutes each day that you get to see Rex.

Wise has allowed the Captain into the medbay under the guise of acting as your liaison with Anakin and the rest of the 501st, traveling separately aboard the Resolute. It's a reasonable excuse, not that anyone is asking questions. And Wise's word is law in the medbay. If he says Rex can come visit, no one questions it.

Each visit is a welcome distraction from the monotony of being cooped up in the bed. The two of you spend hours talking, and you relish every second you get to spend with him. Your conversations are innocent, for the most part. You share stories, catching up on the months you've spent apart, and you learn new things about him, and he about you.

And of course, you steal the occasional kiss, always careful not to get too carried away.

You know the two of you need to talk about the future, and what happens next, but neither of you are willing to break the bubble you’ve found yourselves in. So you continue as you have been, sneaking kisses and spending stolen hours together, knowing full well that the real world will eventually come crashing down on the two of you.

Today, the bubble is finally bursting.

The Oracle has arrived at Coruscant, and the Council is waiting for you.

You've tried to put it out of your mind, tried to distract yourself, but there's nothing else you can do. You can't keep avoiding the inevitable.

So here you are, standing side by side with Booker in the hangar, watching the men disembark onto the tarmac for the first time in months.

You'd forgotten how bright the sun is on Coruscant. How loud. The bustle of the hangar, the whine of ships taking off, the shouting of mechanics, all of it is overwhelming. And the sheer number of clones, all walking past you, heading into the base, it's almost too much. You find yourself looking back toward the safety of the ship, yearning to run back inside.

"Relax," Booker mutters to you as he nods at the passing troopers. "You're making everyone nervous."

"I am relaxed," you reply, forcing a smile and waving at the men. They give you salutes and respectful nods, but you can see the wariness in their eyes. Change is coming, and they can sense it.

"Sure you are," Booker drawls. He steps up beside you, his hands resting behind his back, his posture ramrod straight. He looks the perfect image of a Commander, and a pang of pride hits you. He's grown so much in the time he's served with you, and it's a stark reminder of just how fast they've all matured.

"I'm fine," you lie, glancing over at him.

"Uh huh," he murmurs, and he arches a brow. "How's the ribs?"

"I'm fine," you repeat. You shift from foot to foot, grimacing. You'd insisted on being here for the landing, despite Wise's objections, and you're beginning to regret it. "Just...stiff. They're still a bit tender, but nothing I can't handle."

"That's a lie," he deadpans, and he gives a nod to one of the ARCs passing by. "You're wincing. And you're favoring your right side."

"So I'm not a hundred percent," you concede. "It's still healing."

"It'd heal faster if you'd actually listened to me," Wise interjects as the clone medic approaches the two of you, a scowl on his face. "And if your di'kutla Council had let you go back to your quarters like I'd suggested."

"Hello to you too," Booker chuckles as the two men clasp forearms.

"Book," Wise says with a nod. He turns his gaze to you, and his expression darkens. "I told you to wait in the medbay until the ship was unloaded."

"I wanted to say hello to the men," you reply, waving a hand at the crowd of clones, who are milling around, exchanging greetings and hugs. "And to welcome them home."

"Uh huh," Wise grunts. He looks past you, and his expression softens slightly. "Hey, kid."

"Sir," a familiar voice says from behind you. Dash steps forward, his helmet tucked under his arm, a small smile on his face. "Glad to see you're up and about."

"Dash," you sigh, relief flooding through you. You step forward, reaching out and grasping his forearm, giving him a quick squeeze. He looks tired, but there's a spark of happiness in his eyes that warms your heart. "I could say the same about you. How are you feeling?"

"I'm good, General," he replies, ducking his head. He shifts his helmet in his arms and reaches into a pouch on his belt, withdrawing a small device and holding it out for you. "Here. All fixed."

"Thank you," you murmur as you take your comm unit and slide it onto your wrist. You power it up, and the screen flickers to life, a steady stream of notifications scrolling across the screen. "How many missed calls do I have?"

He grins sheepishly. "Just the ones from General Kenobi, or...?"

"Kriff," you groan. You glance at the comm unit, the messages blurring together as you scan through them. "I'm never going to hear the end of this."

"Probably not," he agrees, and he steps forward and reaches for your arm. "I reprogrammed the encryption keys and set up some extra security measures, just in case. Should be good as new."

"You're amazing," you sigh, and you pull him into a hug. He's tense at first, his shoulders stiff, but after a second, he relaxes, wrapping his arms around you and returning the embrace.

"Careful," he chides, a small laugh escaping his lips. "Wise will skin me if you pop those stitches."

"Don't care," you say as you give him one last squeeze before stepping back. You look him over and grin. "Enjoy your time off. Get some rest."

"Will do," he replies. He glances past you to Booker. "And don't worry. I'll take care of Price. Make sure he doesn't get himself into trouble."

"You're a saint," Booker says with a smirk. "Have fun."

"Oh, we will," Dash snorts, and he nods at Wise. "Chief, can you take a look at my shoulder before we leave? It's still a little stiff."

"Sure," Wise says. He motions for Dash to follow him, and the two men walk toward the hangar, leaving you alone with Booker.

You glance over at him, and he's watching the departing clones, his expression pensive. He's been quiet since your conversation the other day, and you haven't pressed him on it. Now, though, with the others gone, the two of you can talk.

"Credit for your thoughts?" you ask, nudging him.

"Not a whole lot to say," he replies with a shrug. "Just thinking about everything that's happened. And everything that's coming."

"Yeah," you murmur. You look around the hangar. It's emptier now, the men having headed off to the barracks and elsewhere in the city, leaving the two of you alone to oversee the few groups of stragglers. "It's...strange. Being here. Like nothing's changed. And everything has."

"I know," Booker sighs. His lips curve up into a half-smile, and he bumps your shoulder. "We'll figure it out."

You open your mouth to respond, but a flash of blue and white catches your attention, and you watch as Rex steps off the ship, his eyes on his datapad. He's dressed in his usual armor, his bucket tucked under his arm, a stern expression on his face.

He looks every bit the perfect clone soldier. But when he glances up and spots the two of you, his gaze softens, his lips curling into a warm, affectionate smile, and the illusion shatters. He's no longer the stoic, professional soldier, but a man in love.

Your breath catches, and your heart skips a tiny, traitorous little flutter.

"Yeah," you breathe, the corners of your lips lifting. "We will."

Rex looks around before pointing to his vambrace, nodding his head toward the doors leading from the hangar. He doesn't have to speak for you to know what he's saying. And you're all too happy to say yes.

You give him a smile and a quick nod, and Rex ducks his head, hiding his grin. A warm feeling spreads through you at the sight of his hand coming to cover his smile, and you feel a slight flush spread across your cheeks as he gives you one last look over his shoulder before disappearing through the doors.

"No," Booker says after a minute. You glance at him, finding him staring after Rex, his brows raised. His gaze snaps to you, and he looks you over from head to toe, his eyes widening in shock. "No way. Really?"

"What?" you ask, feigning ignorance. You clear your throat and smooth the front of your robes, and you straighten your posture, trying to look unaffected. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Please," he scoffs. He waves a hand in the air, gesturing between the door Rex disappeared through and yourself. "That wasn't a hey, how're you doing look. That was a let's sneak off and make out in a closet look."

"That is a horrible description," you grumble. You start toward the door, ignoring his questioning gaze, and you motion for him to follow. "Come on. The men are unloading the ship. We should get out of their way."

"Not until you explain," Booker replies, matching your stride and falling into step beside you. "And I want details. Everything."

"There's nothing to tell," you mutter, and the two of you duck into the hallway, leaving the chaos of the hangar behind. You walk in silence, weaving your way through the halls until the sounds of the city begin to filter through the walls.

When you're far away from any listening ears, you slow your pace, and Booker slows beside you, waiting patiently for your explanation.

"We've just been...talking," you say, keeping your voice low. You don't need anyone overhearing. Not yet. "And we've gotten closer."

"Closer," Booker repeats. He snorts. "As in, closer than you already were? Because that's impossible."

"We've been...we're..." You huff, shaking your head. Your shoulders slump, and you let out a heavy sigh, running a hand through your hair. "I'm going to be honest with you. And I need you to keep it between us. Can you do that?"

"Of course," he says immediately. "Always."

"Okay," you say as you come to a stop in front of the doors to the lift. It opens immediately, and you step inside, punching in the code for the ground floor. The door closes, and you stay standing in the center of the lift, the space feeling suddenly very small. "We're together. As of the other night."

Booker blinks. Once. Twice. He opens his mouth. Closes it. Opens it again.

"Wait. What?" he asks, his voice rising. He shakes his head, and he takes a step toward you, his hands moving animatedly. "Together, together? Like, kissing, holding hands, dating, together?"

"Yes," you reply, and a wide, happy smile spreads across your face, the giddiness bubbling in your chest.

"Holy shit," Booker breathes. He steps back and leans against the wall of the lift, his eyes wide. He props his foot up on the wall behind him and folds his arms across his chest. "That is...wow."

"Yeah," you sigh, the smile not leaving your face. You can't remember the last time you felt so happy, and you're not even with him. The mere thought of Rex has your heart pounding, a blush spreading across your cheeks, and the ache in your chest isn't entirely due to the wound.

"So. You're telling me," he starts slowly. His head tilts to the side. "That the two of you have been sneaking around the ship, doing kriff knows what with Rex, the poster boy for the GAR, without me knowing about it?"

"We haven't been doing kriff knows what," you retort, glaring at him, but there's no heat to it. "And it's not like that. We're taking things slow. We just...talk. That's all."

"That's all?" he asks skeptically.

"Well," you mumble, looking down. "Maybe some other things. But that's all."

"Other things," Booker echoes. "Other things."

"I swear to the Force, if you repeat this," you growl, and his hands fly up. He gives you an innocent smile that does nothing to hide the amusement sparkling in his eyes.

"I won't," he promises. He chuckles and shakes his head. "It's just...surprising. I didn't think Rex had it in him."

"Neither did I," you say softly, and you rub your arm, chewing the inside of your cheek. "I mean, we haven't even really talked about what we are. Or what's going to happen. With us. This."

"Yeah, that's a problem," Booker says. He pushes off the wall as the lift comes to a stop, and the doors slide open. The two of you step into the bustling hall, and you fall into step beside him, weaving through the crowd.

Within a few steps, you're out onto the street, and the noise from the hangar has faded. The traffic is steady, and there are droids and humans and aliens everywhere. It's a strange sense of normalcy, being surrounded by people who don't know about the war, who don't have any idea of what's happening out there. For a brief second, it feels like none of it matters. Like the war, and the Jedi, and the Council, doesn't exist. And it's nice.

You turn left, heading for the Temple, and Booker follows. He's silent for a minute, lost in thought, before he speaks.

"What do you want to happen?" he asks, keeping his gaze ahead.

"Honestly?" you start. You pause at the crosswalk and wait for the light to change. "I want to keep this. Keep us. Whatever that means. As for Rex..."

"Yeah?"

"I don't know," you murmur. You shake your head, and the light changes. The crowd begins to move, and you follow the flow, your hands tucked under your arms. "I know that I don't want to lose him. I just...he already has reservations about this. About being together."

"And that's why you haven't talked," Booker surmises. You nod, and his jaw clenches. "That's a problem."

"I know," you groan. "But I don't know how to talk to him about it. I don't want to scare him away."

He snorts. "I'm pretty sure it'd take a lot more than this to scare him away."

"Maybe," you murmur, and you let out a weary sigh, rubbing your eyes. The Coruscant sun is blinding, reflecting off the buildings and shining directly in your face. "It's just...this whole situation is...complicated. If he's not ready, I'm not going to force him."

"Force him," Booker repeats, shaking his head. "The two of you are ridiculous. From what I've heard, he's been waiting for this since Kamino. Before, if Fives is to be believed. I'd say that's more than a little ready. He's just worried."

"About getting caught?" you ask, and the question hangs in the air. It's a valid concern. After all, the two of you are breaking the rules. It's a serious infraction. You'd be reprimanded, and Rex would likely be dismissed. There's no way the two of you would come out of it unscathed.

"About karking it up," he replies. He looks around, and he grabs your arm and pulls you off to the side. The two of you lean against a building, sheltered from the sun. "Listen. Rex...he's a good guy. The best, really. And he loves you. A lot. But he's never done anything like this before. Hell, none of us have. He's afraid he's not going to be good at it."

"Well, then I guess we're a good match," you snort a laugh. "Because I'm not exactly an expert either."

"Oh, please," he scoffs, rolling his eyes. "Don't give me the innocent monk act. We both know that's a load of bantha fodder. You've been around."

"It was a lifetime ago," you say, waving a hand dismissively as you push away from the wall. You continue down the sidewalk, dodging a speeder bike as it whizzes past, and your eyes fall on the Temple looming ever closer in the distance. "That doesn't matter. This is different."

"How?"

"Because this isn't a fling," you say softly, and your steps slow. The bustle of the city seems to fade away, the voices becoming quieter, the wind carrying them away. The aura of tranquility that seems to surround the Temple washes over you, calming your nerves and clearing your mind. "It's real. This is a relationship. And I've never been in one. Not like this. Not where it's mattered."

"Well, lucky for you, neither has he," Booker says, his tone serious, and you glance at him, a hint of a smile pulling at the corners of your mouth. "You'll figure it out. Both of you."

"Hopefully," you murmur.

The two of you pause outside the massive gates, closed as always. You let out a heavy sigh and look up at the towering spires above, the sunlight reflecting off the white stone and causing you to squint. It's been months since you've been here, and it feels like years. Everything has changed so much, and yet, nothing has. The Temple is still the same.

"So. How do you want to play this?" Booker asks as he glances at you.

"With caution," you reply wearily.

"Any ideas?"

"We go in. We tell the Council what happened. Again," you add with a grimace. You cross your arms over your chest, your fingers playing with the sleeve of your robe. "And we let them decide."

He lets out a derisive snort, and you roll your eyes, giving him a sharp look.

"Just let me do the talking," you say firmly. "And whatever you do, don't interrupt. If you can keep your mouth shut for five minutes, we'll get through this."

"No promises," he mutters, but he nods in understanding, his gaze serious. He reaches up, clasping your shoulder and squeezing gently. "Come on. Let's get this over with."

"Right," you sigh. You glance around the courtyard, the nerves twisting in your stomach, and you take a deep breath. "Here goes nothing."

The gates to the Temple slide open, and the two of you step inside, heading up the path that leads to the entrance. You ascend the stairs and into the grand hall, which is, unsurprisingly, empty. There are a handful of acolytes milling around, but otherwise, the building is quiet, and you take a minute to breathe, relishing the silence.

It feels odd, having a clone at your side as you walk through the Temple. Rarely does anyone other than the Jedi step foot in the sacred halls. Even meetings are often held offsite, or at least, out of sight. And you've certainly never had one with Booker.

You can see the awe on his face as the two of you move through the vast space, the lights and shadows dancing along the walls and columns. His gaze is roaming everywhere, taking in every detail, his head craning back to see the towering ceilings. You have to nudge him a couple times to get him to focus.

The turbolift to the High Council spire opens, and the two of you step inside. The doors close, and you can hear Booker's heavy breathing as the lift begins its ascent, the numbers ticking by on the display. He shifts beside you, the nervous energy rolling off him in waves.

"What's the worst they can do?" he mutters, more to himself than to you. He lets out a dry laugh. "It's not like they're going to expel you from the Order."

"You never know," you deadpan, and his head snaps toward you, his brows arching. You give him a smirk and shrug. "Well, they could. Not likely, but..."

"You can't be serious," he sputters. "They'd expel you? After everything?"

"I mean, probably not," you admit. You look away, chewing the inside of your cheek. "But...they could. If they wanted to."

"I thought the Jedi were supposed to be all about compassion and mercy," he grumbles, shaking his head. He lets out a huff of annoyance. "If that's the case, they can kiss my—"

The doors to the lift slide open, and the words die on his lips. He gives you a wide-eyed, almost panicked look, and he clears his throat.

"Behave," you hiss as you step into the empty antechamber. He gives a curt nod, his gaze focused straight ahead.

"Yes sir."

You roll your eyes, but can't keep the smirk from spreading across your face as the two of you make your way across the room. The doors to the Council chambers are closed, but a gentle push has them sliding open, revealing the High Council in session.

Booker's shoulders tense beside you, his breath catching, and you reach out and brush your hand against his. His gaze shifts toward yours, and he offers a quick, reassuring smile before straightening his posture and moving aside for you to enter first.

The bright sunlight streams through the windows, illuminating the chamber, and the Masters seated on their thrones look like glowing beacons in the sea of light. Most of the Masters appear in hologram form, their faces projected by the chairs, but Obi-Wan is sitting in the center of the circle, as is Master Windu. Master Yoda is absent, away on Ilum for a Gathering, and his absence leaves an empty seat in the ring.

As soon as you take a step forward and allow the doors to shut behind you, Obi-Wan sits up in his seat, the foot draped over his knee falling to the floor with a thud. The rest of the Council turns their attention toward you, but you remain focused on him. He looks...well, he looks exhausted. Dark circles line his eyes, and his beard is longer than usual, a sure sign that he hasn't taken the time to tend to it recently.

He's a mess, and you feel a pang of guilt, knowing that you're at least partially responsible for his current state. You hadn't meant to worry him, but you have a feeling the last several weeks haven't been easy for him, either.

Obi-Wan's gaze travels over you from head to toe, lingering on the bandage peaking out from your collar. You watch his eyes widen, the muscles in his jaw clenching, and the emotions flit across his face. Concern. Fear. Worry. Guilt. It's all there, clear as day. And the weight of it in the Force is staggering.

"I'm okay," you project to him, opening your mind. "I'm here. I'm okay."

His shoulders sag in relief, and he shakes his head. He gives a rueful smile, and you feel his presence pressing against your shields, a gentle reminder that he's here. "You've a nasty habit of causing me stress, my dear."

"I try my best," you project, the corner of your mouth lifting into a half-smile, and you feel a brief flicker of amusement from him, gone just as quickly as it appears. You take a deep breath and let it out slowly, steeling yourself. "Sorry."

He nods once, swallowing hard, his shoulders slumping slightly. The concern on his face remains, though, and you wonder if it has more to do with the nature of the Council's summons than your injuries.

You make your way toward the center of the room, the weight of the Council's gaze pressing down on you. Booker trails a few steps back, his head bowed respectfully. The silence is heavy, and it's impossible not to notice the air of anticipation in the room.

This is going to be bad.

"Masters," you greet and bow your head. Booker offers a formal salute and falls in beside you, his back ramrod straight, his expression neutral.

"Master Anathorn," Mace says, inclining his head. His gaze is stern, his brow furrowed, but his expression softens. "I trust you are well?"

"Yes, Master," you murmur. You try not to flinch as he leans forward in his seat, his elbows resting on his knees. His brow furrows slightly, and he tilts his head.

"Really?" he asks skeptically, and his gaze sweeps over you. He shakes his head. "I find that hard to believe. The reports we received were quite alarming."

"That's one word for it," Obi-Wan mutters under his breath.

"Obi-Wan," Mace warns.

"I'm fine, Master," you insist.

"Are you?"

"Yes," you reply through clenched teeth.

"So I suppose the report from Skywalker was inaccurate then?" Mace continues, arching a brow. “His captain indicated you suffered an extensive list of injuries during the battle on the surface, including a wound to the abdomen that required surgery. Is this true?"

"It is," you say, and you glance at Booker before straightening. You offer a smile, trying to look nonchalant, even though your heart is racing. “But the Council summoned me, and here I am. I am ready and able to serve, Masters. And if it’s all the same to you, I’d prefer to discuss the mission, and the events surrounding it, at the earliest possible convenience. As I have no doubt you have more pressing matters to attend to."

Mace narrows his eyes, studying you. You meet his gaze evenly, doing your best to look confident. After a minute, he sighs and leans back in his chair, shaking his head.

"Of course," he murmurs. He glances around the circle. "Let us begin. Master Anathorn, Commander Booker, please provide a full debriefing of the situation, and a report of the actions taken to secure the planet."

You clear your throat, and you turn toward Booker. He arches a brow, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. You nod, and he takes a step forward, reciting the same statement he had given over the comms on the ship. You do your best to fill in what he doesn't mention, keeping the report concise, sticking to the facts and not giving away anything more than the Council needs to know.

When you finish, there's a silence in the room. The Council members exchange glances, and the uneasiness in the Force grows stronger, the apprehension hanging thick in the air. They seem hesitant to speak, and your stomach clenches as the anticipation builds.

"First," Master Plo finally speaks, his hands resting on his lap, his fingers steepled. His hologram flickers slightly as he tilts his head. “I wish to extend my condolences to you and your commander for the loss of your men. They will be greatly missed."

Beside you, Booker's posture stiffens, and his hands clench into fists at his sides. You reach out and touch his arm lightly, and he looks over at you, his gaze filled with a mixture of pain and gratitude. He nods once and takes a deep breath before returning his attention to the Council.

"Thank you, Master," you say softly. "Your words are appreciated."

"Indeed," Master Mundi adds. His expression is grim, his lips pressed together tightly, his brow furrowed. "It was unfortunate that so many had to be sacrificed. Especially given the nature of the mission."

You frown, tilting your head, and Obi-Wan clears his throat, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "I'm sorry," you start, glancing around the room. "I'm not sure I understand. It wasn't intentional."

"No," Plo says, his tone conciliatory. "It wasn't. And we do not blame you for the loss of your men, or the failure of the mission."

"We do not," Mace echoes, nodding his head.

Obi-Wan looks away, and you can see his jaw clench, his hands gripping the armrests tightly. He glances at you with a look that can only be interpreted as apologetic. Suddenly, you have a sinking feeling that you're not going to like what comes next. Your hands clench into fists behind your back.

"But you do," Booker says, his voice flat. The Council shifts uncomfortably, and you turn toward him, surprised by the accusation in his tone. "Don't you?"

"Excuse me?" Mundi asks, his eyebrows raised.

"Commander," Obi-Wan interjects, his tone warning.

"You do," Booker says, ignoring the admonishment. He squares his shoulders and takes a step forward, his gaze hardening. "The fact that we're here means you must. Otherwise, why would General Anathorn have been ordered to report while obviously injured? Why wouldn't Master Kenobi have been allowed to debrief the Council himself?"

"You overstep, Commander," Master Shaak Ti scolds, her voice sharp, but you can hear the strain in it. She looks every bit a disapproving mother, but you know she's not as angry as she appears. Not with him, anyway.

"Do I?" he challenges, and she purses her lips, glancing at the others. "If I'm mistaken, please, correct me. Because this meeting feels a lot like an inquisition."

The room falls silent. There's a sudden rush, a sharp inhale, and you can hear Obi-Wan suck in a breath. Beside you, Booker stands stock-still, his expression carefully blank.

You can't find the words to reprimand him, and frankly, you're not sure if you should. He's right. This does feel a lot like an inquisition. The silence, the lack of emotion, the questions. It's all too reminiscent of the last time you were brought before the Council, your investigation into Yaddle's death dismissed and your questions brushed aside in favor of a promotion.

You've tried to move past that, to push the memory from your mind, but now, standing in front of them, the fear and shame and anger come flooding back, and the resentment is hard to swallow. You're a general now. A Master. With a clone unit under your command, and men who are relying on you to lead them. And yet, it seems you've made no progress.

The silence drags on, the awkwardness in the room increasing, and it's Mace who breaks it, sighing heavily and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"You are correct, Commander," he admits, his hand falling away. "It is an inquisition. Of sorts."

"Why?" you ask, your voice strained. Your heart is pounding, the anxiety twisting in your chest, and you do your best to remain calm, to keep your emotions in check. But the anger is bubbling up, and it's hard not to let it get the better of you. "To what end?"

"I think that's obvious," Mace replies, his brow furrowing slightly. He leans forward in his chair, his gaze intent. "You are one of our best, and brightest. I think you've proved that with this campaign. But there are...concerns."

"Concerns," you repeat flatly.

"Your judgment has been...compromised," he explains.

"My judgment," you echo, the words leaving a bitter taste on your tongue. "Really."

"You made a decision," Mundi says, and he rests his hands on his knees, his gaze fixed on you. "A decision based on your attachment to your men. A decision that went against the orders given."

"The orders," you snap, your control slipping, and you can feel the anger flare, hot and bright in the Force. You take a breath and clench your hands into fists, doing your best to keep it under control. “It was the only way. We were outnumbered, my men were dying, I had to—"

"We understand," Shaak Ti soothes, holding up a hand. She offers you a reassuring smile that feels too much like pity. "You were faced with an impossible decision. And you made the choice that seemed the best course of action. We do not fault you for it."

"I would have made the same choice," Plo says, and you can see the hint of a smile beneath his mask. "Your men are worth any risk. And they are fortunate to have you."

"But the fact remains, there is a cost. For you, and for the Republic," Mace continues, and he lets out a heavy sigh. "We cannot afford another defeat like the one at Duro. And we cannot afford our Jedi to act rashly."

"Rashly?" Booker sputters.

"Commander," Obi-Wan starts, his voice firm, and Booker looks over at him, his gaze sharp. "It's not personal."

"Isn't it?" he snaps, and he turns toward the Council, his posture rigid, his shoulders tense. "My men died. Good, loyal men, who served the Republic with honor. Men who were loyal to her. And if it wasn't for the General, more would have died."

"And yet, the shields were destroyed, the city was left unprotected, and the Separatists were able to raze the entire planet," Mundi counters, shaking his head. "All of which could have been avoided if the shield had remained intact."

"You can't blame the General for that," Booker insists. "They had no other option. It was either retreat, or die. Which would you have had her do?"

"Booker," you murmur, reaching out to grab his arm. He flinches away from you, his gaze snapping toward yours, and the fury in his eyes takes your breath away. He's never looked at you like this. He's angry. So angry. And for the first time, you see the anger not just as an extension of his loyalty, but a product of his own fears and emotions. He's not just defending you, he's protecting himself. His brothers. "Stop."

He hesitates, his jaw clenched, and you can see the struggle behind his eyes, the conflict warring within him. But he does as you ask, taking a step back and returning to his position at your side. His expression is blank once more, his emotions carefully hidden, but his hands are clenched into fists, his knuckles white.

"You're right," you say, and the Council looks at you in surprise. You square your shoulders and meet their gazes one by one, doing your best to remain calm. "We could have. We could have stayed and fought until we were all dead. But what good would that have done? Would it have made any difference in the end? Would the Republic have benefited?"

"We would have had the planet," Mundi answers.

"Would we have?" you challenge. "Or would it have fallen as easily as it did without us there? I don't think the answer is clear. Not to me."

"Your point is made," Mace sighs, and he runs a hand over his head. He looks tired, weary. Like he's carrying the weight of the war on his shoulders, and he's close to breaking. "And I will concede that your decision may have saved lives. But that is not the point."

"Then what is the point, Master?" you demand. You're struggling to maintain your composure, the frustration building, and the Force is thrumming around you. "What are we here for?"

The silence returns. The Council looks uncomfortable, shifting in their seats, exchanging nervous glances. Then Mace clears his throat, his brow furrowed.

"The Chancellor is...displeased with the events on Duro," he admits hesitantly. "And he has made it quite clear that he feels the Council failed to provide adequate guidance to our Jedi generals."

"Oh, please," you scoff, rolling your eyes. You let out a harsh laugh. "That's what this is about? Politics? Really?"

"We cannot afford another incident," Mundi adds.

"Another incident," you repeat. "Like what?"

"Like the incident on Hisseen," Obi-Wan answers pointedly.

Your jaw snaps shut. You can't look at him, can't bear to see the disappointment on his face, and you drop your gaze to the floor, clenching your hands into fists. The silence hangs heavy in the air, and you can feel their eyes on you, the judgment radiating from them in the Force. It's suffocating, the pressure increasing with each passing second, and it's almost too much.

"It's not a punishment," Obi-Wan assures softly. You don't answer, keeping your eyes down. He lets out a sigh, and you can feel him reach out to you, his presence warm and soothing. "You know that, don't you? This isn't personal."

"Sure feels that way," you reply, unable to stop the bitterness from leaking through the bond.

"The point, Master Anathorn, is that the Chancellor has made his concerns known," Mundi continues, oblivious to the conversation taking place between you and Obi-Wan. "And that as a result of our loss, Duro has decided to secede from the Republic."

The breath leaves your lungs in a rush, and you swallow hard as Booker curses under his breath beside you. You glance at him, finding him staring at the ground, his fists clenched, his expression dark.

"Oh," you murmur. You look up at the Council, at the pitying expressions on their faces, and you take a deep breath, your shoulders slumping. "Shit."

"Precisely," Mace agrees. He sits back in his seat and shakes his head. "It was a major blow. And it has placed the Order in a precarious position. We cannot afford to lose any more systems. Especially now, with the war at its height."

"So, what happens now?" you ask, glancing around the room. You shift uneasily, your feet shuffling against the polished marble. "What does the Council suggest?"

"We have spoken at length," Plo Koon says, his tone even. "And the decision has been made. There will be no repercussions. For you, or the 419th."

The wave of relief that crashes over you is staggering, and you sway on your feet, the weight lifting from your shoulders. Booker steps toward you and holds out his arm, and you grab hold, giving him a grateful smile. He nods, squeezing your arm briefly before releasing you.

"There's more," Obi-Wan interjects, and the relief evaporates, replaced by a sense of dread.

"Yes," Mace agrees. He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, his fingers steepled beneath his chin. "There is."

"What else?" you ask quietly.

"Given your recent injury and the restructuring that will need to occur with your unit," he begins slowly, "the Council believes it would be in the best interest of the Republic for the 419th Brigade to be temporarily reassigned, and for you to spend some time at the Temple, recovering and meditating."

"For how lo-," Booker starts, but he stops short, the realization hitting him, and he spins around, staring at you with wide eyes. "Wait. Are they benching you?"

"I...yes," you whisper. The floor sways beneath your feet, and you shake your head, trying to clear the fog from your mind. "That's what this is, isn't it? I'm being benched."

"We would like you to take some time to focus on yourself," Mundi says. "You have been through a lot. And the loss of so many men in such a short period of time is not easy. Consider this a meditative retreat. Nothing more."

"Nothing more," you repeat hollowly.

"It will be good for you," Shaak Ti assures.

"Good for me," you echo, blinking hard. It feels like you're outside your body, watching the conversation play out in slow motion, the words echoing in your head.

"This is temporary," Mace adds. He sounds far away, distant. "Until you are fully healed and have had the chance to regain your strength. And until the 419th has been replenished and readjusted."

"And after?" you ask weakly. "When will the assignment end?"

"That will be determined later," he replies.

"How much later?"

"That is a discussion for another time," Mundi answers.

You open your mouth to respond, but the words die on your tongue. You want to argue, to protest, but the energy has left you, and the ache in your chest has returned, a sharp pain that sends a shudder through your body.

"This isn't a punishment," Obi-Wan repeats, his voice echoing in the back of your mind, and you glance at him. He's looking down, his fingers tracing the pattern carved into the armrest of his chair, his expression solemn.

"Isn't it?"

He doesn't answer.

"Well," you finally manage. You offer a strained smile. "Thank you for your...counsel, Masters. And I appreciate the concern. If that is all, Commander Booker and I will be leaving."

"General Anathorn," Mace calls as you turn to leave. You pause and look over your shoulder at him, arching a brow. He sighs, his shoulders slumping slightly. "Please. Take some time. Rest. Heal. When the time comes, we will need you."

For a moment, the anger rises, threatening to boil over, and the words are on the tip of your tongue, but you bite them back, swallowing them down. There's no point. No matter what you say, or do, it won't change anything. They've made their decision, and there's nothing you can do about it.

"Yes, Master," you say. Your tone is polite, respectful. "May the Force be with you."

The words leave a bitter taste in your mouth, and the doors slide closed behind you. Booker strides past you toward the lift, jabbing the button with his finger and waiting impatiently as the door opens. You follow him inside, the silence hanging heavy between the two of you, and he keeps his eyes forward, his expression stony.

"That went well," he deadpans as the doors close and the lift descends.

"Yeah," you sigh, leaning against the wall. You rest your head back and close your eyes, letting out a weary sigh. "Could have been worse."

"Right," he snorts.

You open one eye and look at him. He's still staring straight ahead, his jaw clenched, his lips pursed. The frustration is rolling off him in waves, and you can feel the anger bubbling just beneath the surface.

"What's going on with you?" you ask, frowning slightly.

"Nothing," he mutters. He glances at you. "Everything."

"Booker."

"Don't worry about it," he grumbles.

"I'm going to worry," you retort, folding your arms over your chest. He glares at you, and you arch a brow, giving him a pointed look. "Talk to me."

"They were wrong," he snaps. His shoulders slump, and he leans back against the wall, shaking his head. "And you know it."

"I don't know anything," you reply quietly.

"You saved lives," he argues. "Dash's life. My men's lives. They should have given you a kriffing medal, not put you on ice."

"They're doing what they think is best," you say, though the words ring hollow, even to you. "They have a point. I lost focus. I made a mistake."

"Because you saved lives," he hisses. "What kind of general would you be if you'd just left Dash and the others there to die?"

"A bad one," you admit, and he huffs a laugh. You give him a rueful smile as the door opens, and the two of you step through. "But that doesn't change anything. I have to deal with the consequences."

"This isn't fair," he says, shaking his head. He's silent for a minute before he turns his gaze to you, his expression somber. "Does this mean you're staying here?"

"It looks that way," you murmur. You chew your lip. "I'm sorry. I'll make sure you're taken care of."

"We'll take care of each other," he replies firmly, and he reaches out, gripping your shoulder tightly. "Don't worry. We've got this."

"Yeah," you say. You try to smile, but it falls flat, and he lets out a sigh.

"Look," he starts, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm...sorry. For losing my temper. And for stepping out of line. That's not...that's not like me. Not usually. I just—"

"I know," you assure him, holding up a hand. "It's okay."

"No, it's not," he counters. He runs a hand through his hair, pushing the loose curls from his face. "It only proved their point. And I'm...I'm sorry."

"You were trying to protect me," you say, offering him a half-smile. "I get it."

"I know," he sighs, and he glances around, his eyes sweeping the empty halls. "I just..."

"You just what?"

"I'm gonna miss you," he admits, his voice cracking, and your chest tightens, a lump forming in your throat. You swallow hard, the words stuck. He gives a sardonic laugh and shakes his head. "This whole thing has just been...weird. I never expected this. Any of it. But now..."

"I know," you whisper, and the two of you walk side by side through the deserted halls. The sunlight streams in through the windows, casting a warm glow across the walls and floors. It's peaceful, serene. And it's a sharp contrast to the chaos in your mind. "I'm going to miss you, too."

"Good," he grins. "Because if you didn't, I'd be insulted."

You chuckle, rolling your eyes, and he nudges you playfully with his elbow. The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as the Temple bustles around you. People are coming and going, going about their lives, and you can't seem to shake the feeling of being lost, like a ship without a heading.

Booker hovers, his hand held out toward you as you make your way down the steps toward the entrance. You reach the bottom and turn, smiling softly at him. He lets his hand fall, and his gaze flicks around, taking in the cityscape and the busy traffic lanes.

"You're still going to come around, right?" he asks, and you arch a brow. He shifts nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. "When you can. To the base. To check in. Or something."

"Or something," you chuckle. "Of course I will. As soon as I can. You can count on that."

"Good," he murmurs. He swallows hard and holds out his hand. You roll your eyes and grab it, pulling him into a hug. His arms wrap around you, and he rests his chin on top of your head, sighing heavily. "This sucks."

"It does," you agree, and you squeeze him tighter. "I'll see you soon. And I'll be fine."

"Yeah," he says, pulling back. He gives a lopsided smile. "Enjoy your...time off. And get some rest. You're supposed to be healing."

"Yes, Commander," you reply, and he shakes his head, rolling his eyes.

"I'll see you around," he murmurs.

"Yeah," you echo. "You will."

He takes a step back and salutes before turning and walking away, and you watch him go, your feet rooted to the spot. You can feel the exhaustion settling over you, your wounds aching, and you know it's not from the injury. It's from everything. All of it.

Booker gives one last wave as he pushes open the door, and the sunlight spills in, bathing the corridor in an orange glow. You blink a couple times, lifting a hand to shield your eyes from the harsh light.

"Kriff," you whisper to yourself.

You're so tired.

So, so tired.

It takes a minute for your vision to adjust, and by the time you've gathered your bearings, the doors have slid shut, sealing you inside.

You sigh and turn away from the doors, heading back into the silence and stillness of the Temple. Your steps echo in the empty corridors, the light from the windows fading as you walk, the shadows deepening.

The silence is suffocating, and a weight settles on your shoulders, slowing your steps as you wander. You're exhausted, but the idea of returning to your room and trying to sleep feels impossible. So you walk, drifting aimlessly through the empty halls, lost in thought.

It's not the worst outcome. Not by a long shot. But it still stings. To have your choices paraded in front of the Council time and time again as if you're some wayward child, as if you're not capable of thinking for yourself, is frustrating. And to have your decision made for you, even if it's a temporary situation, feels like a slap in the face.

You thought you made progress with them. Perhaps it was foolish to think otherwise. But given how things had been left before, the change was welcome.

Now, though, it feels as if nothing has changed at all.

Once again, the decision had been taken out of your hands, and you'd had to stand there and take it. Because, really, what other choice did you have?

None.

The thought has a lump forming in your throat, and you swallow hard, forcing it down. Your fists clench and release at your sides, and you find yourself reaching for the necklace again, the pendant cool to the touch. You roll it between your fingers, the rhythmic motion helping to ease the anxiety building inside you.

You know, realistically, that it's a temporary situation. You've been through worse, and the time off will give you the chance to recover, both mentally and physically. But still, the fact remains that it's a punishment. And that the Council didn't see fit to consult you first is a clear indication of their lack of trust in you.

That's the part that hurts the most.

Your feet slow to a stop, and you look around, realizing that you've wandered into the Archives. The lights are dimmed, the room bathed in shadow, and the faint glow from the shelves illuminates the space. You take a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm your racing thoughts.

It's only then that you notice you're standing among the busts of the Lost Twenty.

It's not an intentional visitation. In fact, it's not one you'd ever really considered. You'd always thought recognizing the Jedi who left the Order, disillusioned with your way of life, was a pointless endeavor. Especially when so many had fallen to the Dark Side, leaving nothing but destruction in their wake.

Your gaze meets the last bust in the row, next to Yaddle's, who was erected only recently on your insistence. Dooku's eyes are unseeing, cold and hollow, and yet, it's as if he's looking right through you, the disapproval clear on his face.

You let out a huff of annoyance and roll your eyes.

Even his statue is smug.

You can't deny that he'd had a point. The Republic was flawed. There was a rotting core to it, a lack of understanding of the people it was meant to serve. It had grown corrupt, the bureaucracy a hindrance, and the corruption ran rampant, affecting every level. But while you could agree with him on that point, you could never agree with his solution.

It was one thing to speak against the Republic. It was another to destroy it, and everyone in your path, in order to reshape it in your own image. And while you could acknowledge the hypocrisy of the Jedi Order, of the Senate, there was a line. One that had to be drawn, even if you were the one drawing it.

Even if his offer to help you control your power had been tempting.

It's the same dilemma you're faced with now. The same choice.

You could take Dooku's advice. You could leave. You could walk away from the war, the Order, everything. And no one would fault you. You could go anywhere, be anything, and no one would question your decision. They'd understand. It was the right thing to do.

And yet, the thought of doing it, of turning your back on the Republic, on your men and your brothers and your friends, fills you with a dread so profound that it's a physical ache. You couldn't do that.

No matter how much you hated the politics, no matter how much you despised the Chancellor, no matter how many times you were pulled in a thousand different directions, no matter how many times you'd had a hand raised against you, no matter how many times the Council doubted your motives, you couldn't leave.

You could never abandon those who needed you.

Your hand curls into a fist at your side, and you close your eyes, letting out a shuddering breath. The anger, the frustration, the fear, swirl inside you, threatening to drown you, and you reach for the Force, seeking its calm, its soothing presence.

"This isn't helping," you mutter.

“Another rising star grounded, hm?”

Your eyes snap open, and you whirl around, your hand automatically moving to the lightsaber clipped to your belt. Master Krell steps into the circle of light, his four hands tucked behind his back, his yellow eyes glowing.

"Master Krell," you say. You let go of the saber hilt and give him a slight bow. "Forgive me. I didn't hear you."

"That much is clear," he huffs. He glances at the busts beside you, and his expression turns somber. "Although, I'm not surprised you found your way here. I've often sought refuge in the Archives as well."

"I'm not seeking refuge," you protest.

"Aren't you?" he asks, arching a brow.

You open your mouth to reply, but the words die on your lips. You look away, the flush of embarrassment warming your cheeks.

"I suppose news travels fast," you mutter.

"It does," Krell agrees. He tilts his head, his eyes narrowing slightly as they move over you, taking in the bandage peaking out from your tunic. "It was a grave mistake."

"One I'll pay for," you reply, and you shake your head and glance at the busts beside you, the disappointment on the faces of the Lost Twenty. "At least the Council agreed to let me keep my position."

"For now." He lets out a derisive scoff, and you frown. "You may have survived this battle, but the war is far from over. And without a doubt, they will try to ground you again."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because they have little stomach for the fight," he says, his voice bitter. Krell steps up to your side, and his gaze moves over the busts, his lips pressed together tightly, the muscles in his jaw clenching.

"You disagree with their decision," you surmise.

"As should you," he replies, his eyes flicking toward yours. He regards you for a minute, a small smile tugging at his lips. "But I suppose the Council's judgement is beyond reproach."

You snort and look away, unable to meet his gaze. You can feel the anger simmering inside you, the frustration and irritation. The feeling is mirrored by him, and it's like a physical presence, pressing against you. It's almost a relief to feel someone else's anger, rather than having to hold your own in check.

"They were wrong to take you off the active duty roster," Krell continues, and he looks at you with a sympathetic expression. "To force you into this...retreat."

"Yes," you say softly. You nod, biting your lip. "Yes, they were."

"And yet," he continues, his four arms spreading out to his sides, "what can be done? It is the Council's decision, and you must abide by it."

"I don't have a choice," you agree. You sigh and run a hand through your hair, shaking your head. "At least it's a temporary situation."

"Indeed," he muses, and his lips twitch. "But perhaps not as temporary as the Council might like."

"What do you mean?"

"I have heard that the Chancellor's patience is wearing thin," he says, his voice low. He glances at you out of the corner of his eye, and his smirk widens. "Word travels fast, as you said. And it seems the loss of Duro has him quite concerned."

"He should be concerned," you say. You roll your eyes, your annoyance returning full force. "This isn't the first time a system has threatened to leave the Republic. If he's worried about losing systems, he should focus his attention on actually listening to his people."

"You and I are in agreement," he replies with a chuckle.

"That's a surprise," you muse, tilting your head. You give him a curious look. "I didn't know you cared much for the political side of things."

"I have no desire for politics," he scoffs, and he glances at the busts of the Lost Twenty beside him. "But I will not allow the Republic to turn its back on those who have given so much."

"No," you murmur, and you reach up and touch the pendant of your necklace, rolling it between your fingers. "Neither will I."

Krell looks at you, an odd expression on his face. It's almost as if he's studying you, and there's something else there, too. Something more serious. More calculating. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but the words die on his lips, and he closes it with a snap, his gaze turning back to the busts.

"Your faith is admirable," he says after a minute. He takes a step back, his hands folding behind his back, and he shakes his head. "But it will not change their minds. Or the outcome."

"I know," you concede. "But it's worth a shot."

"Is it?" he asks. His lip curls slightly. "What is the saying? The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result?"

"Well, no one has ever accused me of being sane," you reply with a wry smile. "And it's not the first time I've been grounded. I'll figure something out."

He hums, but doesn't respond, and the two of you stand in silence, the darkness enveloping you. It's strange, seeing him in the Archives. You'd never taken him for the scholarly type. He's not exactly the model Jedi. Then again, neither are you.

"Perhaps you're right," he muses after a minute. He steps up beside you and places a hand on your shoulder. His touch is firm, his grip strong. You meet his gaze, and he gives you a small smile. "I do believe the Council is wrong in this matter. But I also believe that you will find a way to rise above it."

"Thank you," you whisper, and you smile, the first genuine smile you've felt all day. "I appreciate the support."

"Of course," he replies as his hand falls away. He gives you a curt nod. "And with that, I bid you goodnight. May the Force be with you, General Anathorn."

"Goodnight, Master Krell," you reply with a small bow.

Krell turns and walks away, disappearing into the darkness, the shadows swallowing him whole. You watch him go, your eyebrows furrowing, his words still echoing in your head.

His support is surprising. You hadn't expected it. And his words echo your own thoughts. You knew the Council was wrong. You knew it would be hard to stay grounded. You knew the men would struggle. But hearing another Jedi say it, hearing them agree with you, is a comfort. Especially someone as strong as Krell.

He is right. There is a certain madness to repeating the same actions over and over, expecting a different result. The question is, how can you break the cycle? How can you prove to the Council that you're worthy of their trust?

"The definition of insanity," you murmur.

You sigh and turn your attention back to the busts before you. They look at you expectantly, judging, waiting for you to make the right choice.

A shiver runs down your spine, and the hair on the back of your neck stands up. You look around, but the Archives are empty, and, slowly, the feeling passes. You sigh and run a hand over your face, the exhaustion sinking into your bones

You're too tired for this.

Your hand closes around the pendant of your necklace again, and you roll it between your fingers.

You can figure this out later. Right now, you need to sleep.

You turn and start toward the door, and the bust of Yaddle catches your eye, her warm gaze fixed on yours, and you can't resist the urge to stop and say goodbye. You reach out and brush your fingertips over the top of her head, running your thumb along the edge of her ear.

"Goodnight, Master," you murmur.

You step away from her, and she watches you go, her eyes following you until the darkness swallows you whole.

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#the clone wars #captain rex #clone captain rex #captain rex x reader #rex x reader #roy writes #event horizon #rubs hands together like an evil fly #dont hate me for the ending okay thanks

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