#sirius needs a hug

[rogata453]

If you’re blaming Sirius for leaving, I don’t trust you. Sirius didn’t owe Regulus a thing. Yes, they both lived in that house, and yes, neither of them deserved that. Yes, Sirius had James and Regulus didn’t. But was it Sirius’ fault that Regulus chose to stay and become Death Eater? No, it was not. I hate what happened to Regulus with me whole fucking heart, but Sirius is not the one to blame. Walburga and Orion are. Voldemort is.

Sirius was a child when he ran away. He was sixteen. SIXTEEN. I don’t care if your headcanon is that Sirius was physically or verbally abused. It doesn’t matter if he was tortured or just hated but never phycisally hurt. The point stands - he was better off leaving, and I will defend him for the rest of my life.

And here’s the thing: Sirius leaving wasn’t just about survival. It was about choosing himself for the first time, about refusing to let his family break him down any further. It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary. Blaming him for escaping is cruel and shows a complete lack of empathy for his situation.

Yes, it’s tragic that Regulus stayed behind, that he felt trapped in a world that Sirius managed to escape. But Regulus’ choices - though shaped by his circumstances - were his own. Blaming Sirius for his brother’s fate is unfair and oversimplifies a deeply complex situation.

Sirius’ decision to leave wasn’t a betrayal - it was an act of survival. And survival is never something to apologize for.

[badabadaboom21]

sirius after realising he doesn’t like girls but remus lupin

[s0pa-de-letras]

Sirius' unexpected talent.

(click here to read on ao3)

Hurt/comfort, past child abuse, trauma reveal, established wolfstar.

Featuring the marauders, Lily, Mary, Marlene and Sirius' traumatic chilhood

"Oh, how I wished Proffessor Binn didn't make us take notes in his class." Peter sighs, slumping his head in the common room table.

They have formed an improvised study group this afternoon. It started with Lily and Remus actually doing their work -to nobody's surprise- and then the rest of the group migrated near them at some point. Peter first, because he does puts effort into his studies as well. Then Marlene and Mary, who aren't as responsible as the rest but at least try, and finally James and Sirius.

Sirius isn't doing his work at all, though. He is just sprawled over Remus' lap. James is at least pretending to read a book.

"Me and you mate." Remus sighs, running a hand through Sirius' hair as he frowns at his own handwriting, unsuccessfully trying to decipher its contents.

James sighs wishfully from his seat. "I would sleep so peacefully."

Marlene groans. "Merlin, my naps there would be legendary."

Mary nods in agreement, and Lily's face turns to something frustrated and a bit angry. "And he doesn't even teach! Like, the guy only makes us copy what he says, but he doesn't actually explain anything."

Sirius sits up from where he was drifting off in his lap, and yawns. Remus puts the arm previously petting his hair in his waist, and Sirius leans in him. "You guys are really dramatic today." He says sleepily.

If Lily's eyes could kill, Sirius would be dead twice over. "We are only stating facts. Not all of us had private tutors that recited us the entire wizarding history every night before we could walk."

Sirius raises his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. Point taken." He says, backing off. "If it's that much of a trouble for you I could just share my notes so you don't have to copy anything."

Mary raises an eyebrow. "Sirius, I love you. Truly. But I don't trust you for a second in academic settings."

Marlene snorts. "Yeah, I'm sure your handwriting must be a mystery of its own."

"It's not, actually." Peter chimes in. "It's really pretty. The private tutor sessions had to pay off in some way."

"There is no way-" Lily says, incredulous, as she reaches for Sirius' bag.

James laughs, shaking his head, already familiar with his best friend's handwriting. "Oh, Lily."

Marlene, Mary and the redhead all pile up as the latter pulls up a piece of parchment. "God, it looks straight from a book's page." Mary exclaims as he sees it, impressed.

"Better than that, I'd say." Marlene murmurs, both eyebrows raised.

Lily doesn't say anything, because her pride is a bit too big to allow defeat to Sirius Black.

Sirius has a smug grin on his face. "As I said, I can just let you duplicate my notes in that class. It's really no trouble for me."

Remus shakes his head. "That's not fair for you, pads."

Sirius scoffs, rolling his eyes.

"It's really not." James agrees. "You deserve to sleep off that class as much as the rest of us."

Sirius' smug smile suddenly gets back on his face. "I can sleep while copying what I hear." He says, all pride in his voice.

"That's impossible." Lily says, looking at him, unimpressed.

"Yeah Sirius, That's bullshit." Marlene snorts, amused.

"It is not." Sirius retorts, actually offended. "I learned how to because I had to write a lot of lines when I was younger."

Remus' heart skips a beat, as it does whenever his boyfriend mentions his parents. He looks up and sees James and Peter with the same cautious expressions on their faces.

"I- like school lines? Your tutors made you do that?" Mary asks, surprised.

"Nope, my parents." He shrugs. "The thing is, I can. So it's not an issue at all for me to lend you my notes."

Remus narrows his eyes. Writing lines is... uncharacteristically mild for Sirius' parents, he thinks.

"How the fuck do you even learn to sleep while doing that?" Marlene asks, bewildered and a bit suspicious. She probably has an inkling about the Black's parenting methods.

"Well," Sirius starts, wrinkling his nose. "I usually got sleepy after a few hours, and since I couldn't stop I just...learned to keep doing it?" He finishes, shrugging. "Not the important bit, anyways. Do you or do you not want me to lend me my notes from now on?"

"Padfoot, go back a sec." James rushes to say. "How much time did they make you write lines for?"

Remus shallows and squeezes his waist encouragingly. Sirius doesn't look too uncomfortable, just extremely confused. "Like, a least the whole day? Sometimes? It depended on what I did."

Remus feels the room grow colder at the statement, his friends' faces slowly turning horrified. "Sweetheart, they made you write for days?"

Sirius nods slowly, his eyebrows twitching in honest bewilderment. "I- yes? Why are you being so- Ohh," His face glows with understanding. "Is this another Black's thing?"

James grimaces. "Yeah, padfoot. It is."

Sirius blinks. "Even without a blood quill?"

"Wh- they used a blood quill?" Lily exclaims, angry as fuck. "That's classified as fucking torture!"

Sirius helplessly lets out a short laugh. "Is it really? It barely even hurts." He shakes his head in unbelief. "The most annoying thing about it is how tired it made me. Which brings me to my previous point, as writing for an hour with a normal quill doesn't quite compare."

"Blood quills do hurt, Padfoot. You just have too much pain tolerance." Peter tells him, sighing. "And I'm not sure I'm comfortable with letting you use a skill you learned like that for my sake."

Sirius waves a hand in dismissal, but Mary stops him with a look. "No Sirius, really. They could've actually hurt you like that."

Sirius doesn't manage to keep himself from snorting, and they all give him equally stern glares for it.

Remus frowns, still unconvinced by his initial point. "Are you sure you really fall asleep while doing it?"

Sirius nods. "I know for a fact that I've passed out while copying before. Because of the blood loss and all. They usually woke me up almost instantly, and then I just sort of...started to drift off on my own? I don't know how to explain it exactly."

"Oh, padfoot." James says, seemingly on the verge of tears. Sirius looks quite horrified by the sight of his best friend with such a sad expression.

"They- Oh god, they kept you writing without food?" Lily says, paling a shade.

"Food was one of their preferred bargain chips." Sirius says absentmindedly, immediately regretting it at everyone's really concerned faces. "Hey- chill, guys. I'm living with Prongs now. Everything is cool."

"That doesn't make what happened to you okay." Marlene says, visibly pissed off. "Oh, I want to kill them slowly."

Peter nods at her, sharing the sentiment.

"I don't think you actually sleep, pads." Remus carefully starts. "I think you just...check out for a bit. Doesn't it feel similar to what you do after nightmares sometimes?"

Sirius considers for a second. "Maybe." He admits. "But my point remains. It feels like sleeping, so it's not an effort for me to do it for you."

"Yeah, I'm not buying that." James declares, looking at him somewhat apologetically.

Sirius rolls his eyes, and looks at the rest for support. He doesn't find any.

"Sorry, mate." Peter says. "There is no world where I'm accepting you doing that."

"Yeah. No way, french boy." Marlene says. Lily just raises an eyebrow in a 'are you being for real' way.

"I actually would like to give mines to you from now on." Mary offers. "I don't like the idea of you having to write for hours anymore."

"I think that is a great idea, Mary." James eagerly nods. Sirius' face is growing more and more incredulous by the second.

"And we are telling McGonagall about it." Lily declares, to which Remus promptly announces his whole and complete support.

"Whoa- You are making this a way bigger deal than it is." Sirius rushes to express. "Like, thank you really, but it's fine. I- It was probably their softest punishment. And I literally drift off when I write for more than half hour without meaning to, anyways."

"That actually just makes it worse, you know." Remus tells him. "If you check out when you have to write for a long period of time, it means you don't feel safe while doing it. It's a defense mechanism."

Sirius gapes, and then grows increasingly frustrated. "You are being dramatic. The lot of you."

"We are absolutely not." Mary announces. "And you aren't going to be taking notes for long periods of time as long as I have something to say about it."

"Yep, and Minnie definitely needs to know about this." James remarks. "I have no doubts she wouldn't have made you write lines as a punishment if she had been aware of it before."

Sirius tries to 'talk some sense into them', but Remus silences him with a kiss when he opens his mouth. "Nuh uh, love. You are not going to change our opinion."

Sirius looks at all their faces, looking for any hint of how to make them let it go, but his shoulders slump in defeat when he doesn't find anything.

"Okay. But you are really dramatic." He says, defeated. Although, Remus can see the faintest flick of a smile on the corners of his mouth.

Sirius was given copies of his friends' notes on History form magic for the rest of their years at Hogwarts, and Minerva McGonagall didn't give him lines to write as punishment ever again.

Read on ao3 here.

[girl9inthepinkdres]

I like to think that if Sirius had the chance he would have taken Reg with him when he ran away from home , or else he would have come back to get him

that he would come up with a plan with the boys to save him, that he would be taken to the Potters' or Lupins' house

I like to think that while he was packing his things he thought about taking Reg and even asked him if he wanted to run away with him, but Reggie, already very involved with the whole Death Eater thing, thought it best not to, besides not wanting to get into more trouble with Walburga and Orion.

that Regulus spent the night thinking and crying, wondering why he didn't agree to go along

that when Sirius arrived at the Potters' house he cried all night for his brother, and James was there to hold him while he himself held back his tears for seeing your brother in heart suffering and your crush also suffering

that going back to school at Hogwarts was painful for both sides, Sirius thinking that his brother was still trapped in the horror show and that he couldn't help him properly and Regulus thinking about how lucky his brother was to finally be free from Walburga's scary clutches (and to be with James every day)

[itsnevercasualorover]

I was just thinking about how reggie must’ve felt when Sirius left and how it was truly the last straw. The time when he felt his empathy vanish and how despite being the heir he still feels the presence of sirius haunting his every move-how he yearns for his parents approval only for them to belittle him. And that’s when he decided to take the dark mark in a futile attempt to be the perfect child, to be what sirius didn’t want to be, the clarity of his choices hitting him only until it was too late and he was drowning in the pools of regret and resentment. How he was so young and so confused with such a large inferiority complex because despite everything sirius was always better, happier, smarter and the only thing he wanted was to be loved unconditionally with no qualms. How he always failed to see the good in himself and how he thought he was an opaque black void that swallowed everything good, a deep mass of emptiness that just couldn’t reign supreme over the incandescence of the brightest star in the night sky.

Yeah fuck me why did i think.

[cornishpadfoot]

Sirius: It's not your fault, Remus.

[loonyloopylupin96]

[shadowjinx2906]

!NOT MY ART!

Felt like making a book cover for the ff I’m currently obsessed with while I wait for the next update 😊 (The Sensation of Screaming by itsallinthenamereggie on ao3—def recommend but it is on the heavier side of angst and I’m not sure how canon compliant it will be 🤷‍♀️ Also just realized I may have gotten the “Reggie, did you see?” quote wrong but I’m not sure..)

[kelpforestfire]

New Chapter!

Look at this little fic grow, with a regular posting day and everything! They grow up so fast 😭❤️

it's a Klaus retelling with the marauders and in chapter 4 we meet James! 

Postmarked on ao3 

(and now with chapter 4)

[neverenoughmarauders]

The perfect plan

‘You can’t - ’

James sounded desperate. But Sirius had already made up his mind.

‘Then Voldemort shouldn’t have come after my godson.’

‘I wish I’d never asked you to be Harry’s godparent. We never intended -‘

‘For any of this to happen,’ Sirius said softly, and he wrapped his arms around James.

James had become so thin, so frail. 

How could James not see that it didn’t matter if Sirius was Harry’s godfather or not. Harry was Lily and James’ son. Sirius loved Harry more than he knew he was capable of loving anyone, more even than James. And at the same time, Sirius knew he loved Harry because he was Lily and James’ son.

Sirius would protect Harry with his life. 

‘I know, Prongs, I know.’

...

Basically found some old notes on my phone and couldn't bring myself to delete it

[iwriteasfotini]

The fracture between the brothers...

TW use of Cruciatus Curse on young Regulus and Sirius

Walburga stepped over the glass and grabbed Sirius and Regulus by their robes. “Upstairs, drawing room. Now.” She shoved them from the room. 

The brothers shuffled up the stairs. 

“How could you, Sirius?” Regulus’ voice was trembling. 

“I’m sorry, Reg, I . . . I lost my head. I’m so sick of all of this.”

“Sirius, you have to be more careful.”

Sirius studied Regulus’ alarmed face. “I’m supposed to be taking care of you,” he whispered. He hung his head. 

They stood in the drawing room in silence. It wasn’t long until footsteps could be heard coming up the stairs. 

“I told everyone to leave,” Walburga said, her voice icy. “We have a situation to deal with.” 

Orion had followed her into the room and stood back near the wall. Walburga fingered her wand. 

“Sirius, I’m done with you. You need to start acting like a Black if you are going to take your rightful place as heir. And apparently nothing has given you enough incentive. So we will try something more personal.”

Sirius didn’t have time to react, but he didn’t need to. 

“Crucio!” Walburga said, pointing her wand not at Sirius but at Regulus. In one heartbeat Sirius realized his mother understood his Gryffindor Sorting far better than she let on. 

Regulus collapsed, shrieking and jerking on the floor. Sirius didn’t think. 

“No!” He ran at his mother, who spun on the spot and reappeared on the other side of the room. 

Her apparition had broken the curse, but Regulus barely had a second to catch his breath before she cried, “Crucio!” again. This was certainly it, the illegal curse Dumbledore had told Sirius about which caused extreme pain. 

Regulus let out a blood curdling scream. Sirius’ head was spinning. “Do something,” he screamed at his father. He dropped to the floor next to Regulus, sobbing. His hands flapped madly; there was nothing he could do. 

“Walburga,” Orion said softly. 

Walburga broke the curse and looked at Orion. “I’ve seen enough. Sirius has shown us time and again he is not fit to be the heir. I refuse to pass the family inheritance into the hands of a blood traitor. Why can’t Regulus take the role? He is the second son, but he is a far more suitable Black. 

Walburga turned back to her boys. Who were both sobbing on the floor. Sirius draped himself over Regulus. 

“Regulus, do you think your father is correct? Should Sirius be allowed to inherit our fortune and legacy?”

The brothers stared at each other, Regulus shaking from the curse. 

“Regulus, answer me!”

Regulus pushed Sirius off him and sat up. He took a few deep breaths. When he looked up, his eyes shone with something Sirius had never seen before—they were dead.  

“No, he should not,” Regulus said as evenly as he could. “He is not fit to lead the house into an honorable future.”

“Regulus!” Sirius pleaded. 

“And you think you are?” Walburga said. “You’re weak, Regulus. Prove to me you are stronger than you look—that you will make a better heir than Sirius.”

“How?” Regulus asked. 

“What would you do to a son who mouthed off like Sirius did?” asked Walburga.

Regulus looked directly into his mother’s eyes. “I would punish him.”

Sirius couldn’t believe his ears. He couldn’t believe his eyes when his mother motioned for Regulus to move back and pointed her wand at him. 

“Crucio!” 

It was agony, utter agony. Sirius couldn’t think; his vision went blurry; his body was on fire. His skin was being peeled back from his muscles. His bones were breaking. He was screaming at the top of his lungs. His head would surely burst at any moment. 

It went on. And on. And on. All Sirius could do was scream. 

Then he thought he saw a bright white flash; but he couldn’t be sure because he promptly blacked out.

>>><<<

From Chapter XII - Heir and Spare of The Heir and The Spare

Though this moment fractures their relationship, the brothers continue to try to tend to each other, but secretly or from a distance. Oh the angst!!! It takes them about five years to reconcile, but in my series they do. It's still a tragic ending.

[green-and-grey-kenaz]

Language: English

Characters: Regulus Black, Sirius Black, muggle neighbour

Summary:

The knocking became more frantic, a rapid tip-tap tapping, and Sirius grabbed his wand. Anyone who knew him knew he preferred a quick, sharp ring on the muggle doorbell rather than repetitive knocking. And yet… anyone who wanted him dead wouldn’t knock. He opened the door and a figure stumbled back, swaying. A drunkard. Sirius almost relaxed. Then his eyes caught up with the evening’s darkness. He went to slam the door shut but Regulus reached forward, dripping with something dark. “I don’t want to live.”

Word Count: c. 3,500

[dionesdaughter]

Choose Me - Regulus Black (Prologue)

A/N: This is something I started writing at 16, and not my best work, so I'm open to constructive criticism! I have it posted on Quotev and Ao3, but only have like three chapter posted, so if yall like it, maybe I'll pick it back up and try to make it better.

Regulus wasn't dumb. He knew his parents weren't good, not in the slightest. He knew that they were partaking in things that were grotesque and wrong. Regulus was no fool, though his brother seemed to think he was, "Sirius, all I'm saying is that you could try not to fight with her as much!" Regulus spoke, exasperated. Sirius scoffed indignantly, "that's rich coming from you Reggie, you're her favorite. She would never treat you like that!" He bit back from the other side of his bedroom, nothing short of venom in his voice. Even when angry, Sirius still called him by his nickname, something affectionately given shortly after he had transitioned and told Sirius his new name, his real name. Their mother was none too pleased at his transition, but once realizing Sirius would never live up to the title of 'Heir to the great house of Black', she begrudgingly started calling him Regulus. Regulus didn't flinch at Sirius' tone of voice but he backed off slightly, "I just don't want her to hurt you again." He spoke, almost pleadingly, to Sirius, a rare show of vulnerability written on his face. Sirius softened slightly, letting out a sigh and sitting onto his bed, "I'll be okay." He responds, resignation in his voice. Regulus nods, "I know." He says, and he believes it, foolishly and selfishly, he believes it.

                         --‐---------------------------

It's not even 2 days later when they fight again. Sirius Black is by no means his parents child, but he has rage only matched by Walburga herself. Regulus stands in the hallway just up the stairs, listening. Although he doesn't show it outwardly, he's nervous. He never likes to see his brother hurt, and if he can interject before that happens, he does. Walburga is screaming something horrific about blood status, and upholding the honor of the Black family, and Sirius is petulantly egging her on, fighting back. Regulus is too late to realize and stop the first 'crucio' that leaves his mother's mouth. Sirius' screaming echos around the house. Regulus's heart skips a beat, aches in his chest. He swiftly rushes down the stairs and into the room where they were. Sirius is on the ground, gashes littering his body and looking pale. Walburga had stopped the curse, and was prepared to fire another when- "Mother," Regulus spoke, willing the shake out of his voice, "I wanted to know which extra classes I need to take to uphold the Black family name." It's a lie, and he's not sure his mother will believe it, but she does. She turns to him, a sickly sweet smile on her face, "Let's go talk about it." She says, striding toward him swiftly. He nods, turning to follow her out of the room, casting one last glance at Sirius before he went.    

                      ----------------------------

Regulus is standing in the doorway of Sirius' room, like he has done so many nights before. Sirius is stalking about his room, grabbing clothes, and books, and whatever else, and throwing them into his trunk. Regulus is frowning, "Sirius, think about this, please." Sirius barely spares him a glance, continuing. Regulus steps further into the room, "Sirius." He tries again. Sirius sighs, turning to look at him, "come with me." He says simply, genuinely. Regulus tries not to cry, "Sirius.." he says, a sad ring to his voice. Sirius steps toward him, "I'm serious Reggie, come with me. I'm sure James wouldn't mind at all if you came too." Regulus shakes his head, "You know I can't do that Sirius. Just stay." He says imploringly. Sirius' gaze hardened as he took a step back, turning to close his trunk and pulled it along behind him, "you're just like them Regulus." He snaps, pushing past him and walking down the hallway. Regulus blinks, Sirius had called him Regulus. Hurt cut him deep in his chest, but he turned to follow Sirius anyways. Down the stairs and to the front door, Regulus tried to convince him to stay. Sirius didn't  say a word, and with nothing more than a brief glance, he was gone. 2 days later, Regulus is forced to get the dark mark, and Sirius was burned off the family tree, just like his cousin Andromeda. A week after that, he leaves for hogwarts, having lost almost all of himself in the span of 2 weeks.

[s0pa-de-letras]

Tale of a Black star.

clich here to read on ao3!

"Ughhh-" Mary suddenly groans, head slumping over her half-finished essay. "Could you guys be useful for once and pull some shit off so we don't have to do our aritmathy test on Monday?"

"Aye aye, captain." Peter dutifully says. "Marauders, we have a mission. Prank brainstorming, quick!"

"What about…a chair that teleports you to another chair when you sit on it?" James offers. Sirius hasn't woken up enough to contribute in any way yet.

"Continue." Remus nods, after considering it for a few seconds.

"So, my uncle is dating this guy who has a shop of furniture, and he sells a kind of chair that-" James explains, a glint of mischief shining brightly in his eyes.

"Wait, wait- go back. Is that a thing?" Sirius gasps, aghast and extremely confused "A guy dating another guy?"

They all stop for a second, in shock. Remus' heart skips a beat.

"I- yeah, Pads. It is. It's not really well seen in the muggle world, but it's pretty common here." James explains slowly, his bewilderment morphing slowly into horrified realization. "Did you not know that?"

Sirius' mouth is wide open, and he needs a couple of second to answer. "No, I- Godric's beard this is amazing." A wide smile sets itself in his face. "I can date boys? This is the best day of my life. How does it work? Is there a potion to magically have babies? Can girls also date other girls? Merlin, I can date boys!"

Remus doesn't know what to feel at the moment because, well, Sirius' rambling will never not be adorable, but the circumstances aren't specially joyful.

"There isn't-" Lily starts to answer, just for Sirius to cut her off when a new round of questions seemingly attacks his mind. Remus sees her take a big, deliberate breath to stop herself from snapping at him.

"Can I shag with boys too, or is shagging only a girl's thing? Why don't books talk about boys shagging boys more? Does falling in love with a boy feel different from falling for a girl? Because if it doesn't then I-"

"Padfoot, breathe. One question at a time." Peter manages to say.

"Oh, right!" He says, smile never leaving his face. He looks genuinely ecstatic. He runs a hand trough his long hair as he struggles to chose only one thing to ask. "Since when?" He settles on.

Mary frowns. "Since when what, Sirius?"

"Since when can you do this? Or, has it always been a thing?" He clarifies.

"It's always been a thing." Remus answers this time, and he sees clear as a day as Sirius' entire face turns red as a tomato as he seemingly registers Remus has been by his side this whole time.

"And, about what you said earlier, homosexual relationships can't reproduce. They can, however, adopt or get someone's help to have a biological baby from one of them. That is, unless one of them is transgender, in which case reproduction is possible." Lily's explanation doesn't seem to help Sirius much, because he looks even more confused than before.

"Hold on, homosexual." He repeats. "What is that? What is transgender? I- Lily those were way too many difficult words."

"Homosexual is how people who like the same gender are called." James chimes in again. "Have you heard the terms 'gay' and 'lesbian'? Gay is a guy who likes guys, and lesbian the same but with girls."

"Wha-" Sirius blinks, getting overwhelmed by the second. "It has a name?" He seems to precess everything James says, and his shoulder's slump in disappointment. "Oh, you can only like either girls or boys?"

"Oh, No!" Mary rushes to explain. "You absolutely can like both, is called bisexual. And you can also not like either, but that's a bit more hard to explain."

"I can date boys and girls?" Sirius asks, with such hope and happiness in his voice Remus is going to melt.

"You can, yeah." James says, before swallowing. "Your parents never mentioned you any of this, right?"

"No, they- ohh they probably didn't want me to know at all, right?" He says, not really surprised. "That tracks. Because of the whole not reproducing thing."

If Sirius' parents' ever end up in the same room as Remus, they are not getting out alive. His friend's expressions tell him they are thinking similar things.

"I like girls. And I'm pretty bold with it. How did you not notice that?" Marlene asks, a bit offended.

"I thought it was admiration." Sirius mumbles absentmindedly. "Am I annoying you a bit too much or can I keep asking questions?"

"Sirius, ask as many questions as you want." Remus tells him as sincerely as he can.

"Great." He says, grin firmly back on his face. "What was the other word you said, Lily?"

"Transgender," She begins, "Are people who identify as something other than the sex they were born with. Trans men are men who have vaginas, for example. You can also not identify as either of them, and some other things, but if you want to know more about that a book would explain it better than me."

"Ohh, cool. " He nods. "And- the not liking either thing?

Peter is the one who answers this time. "It's like, in two categories." He starts, weighting his words. "Asexual is when you don't want to shag with someone, and arromantic is when you don't want to date someone. You can do both, one, or neither. But, like Lily said, a book will explain that better than me."

"This is all so cool." He he declares, somehow even more astounded than before. "Like, I can date boys." His smile is practically glowing, and he turns to look at James, who nods fondly at him.

Then, Sirius looks back at Remus, and his eyes widen. His cheeks turn incredibly flustered. "Oh, shit-" He says, suddenly having the need to aggressively fuss with his hair in panic, seemingly trying to fix it. "Hi. Moony. How are you? The whether is nice, isn't it? Not as nice as you but- No, wait, forget I said that. Not that I think you aren't nice, but maybe it was a bit too much and- Merlin, I'm making a total fool of myself. I'm sorry, I don't-"

"Sirius." Remus fondly stops him, helplessly amused.

"Would you like to go on a date with me?" He says in one breath, face turning impossibly redder. "You don't have to say yes, of course. I don't know why I even asked. I'm sorry. Forget it. I just like you a lot and I just discovered that dating you is even a possibility and I-"

"I would love to, Sirius." Remus kindly interrupts him again.

"Oh." Sirius lets out, smile growing to something bloody ethereal. "Oh Merlin." He gasps, putting a hand in his mouth while kicking his feet and laughing maniacally.

"I think a bit of fresh air will do you good." James chuckles, grabbing Sirius' shoulders and guiding him out of the dorm. Sirius doesn't seem to care much, high in happiness as he is. Remus can hear him excited tell James over and over again 'I got a date with moony' as they exit through the portrait.

"He's a mess." He feels himself say.

"Oh, you are down bad." Lily laughs at him, and Remus nods. Because he is.

"That was frankly adorable." Mary starts, pointing at Remus' general direction. "But, am I the only one whose homicidal urges just expanded to dangerous points?"

"Oh, not at all." Marlene nods. "His parent's are dead. Like, no fucking way."

"Yeah, and like- I've noticed other things, too." Lily sighs, looking at him and Peter as if asking a silent question.

Remus softly shakes his head. "Not ours to share, Lils."

"Yeah, but we can admit that those scumbags aren't short on reasons to deserve a painful, slow death." Peter darkly says, crossing his arms.

Little did they know, there was another aspect of The Black's parenting methods that would start to show its ugly head soon enough.

Click here to read the whole fic

[sapphicmarauders]

A wolfstar short story that i wrote a few months ago

Sirius had lived most of his life being told he was unloveable. Being told he would never find someone who would deal with ‘someone like him���. So when Remus told him that he loved Sirius, he ran away. How could someone as sweet and caring as Remus love someone as sarcastic and annoying as Sirius? Then, when Remus kissed him for the first time, he, once again, refused to believe Remus actually liked him.

It was a cold January day and Sirius had gotten another letter from his family. He was sitting next to the window when Remus had stumbled into the common room, exhausted from hours of studying in the library. However, when he spotted Sirius curled up, quiet for once, he changed pathways. He dropped his stuff by the edge of the seat.

“Another letter?”

Sirius passed the piece of parchment over to him wordlessly. Remus skimmed over it, not much was new, however they didn’t mention the ‘you’re a disgrace to this family’.

“Amateurs, right?”

Remus looked up and, to his surprise, Sirius had tears in his eyes. He leaned forward and pulled the black-haired boy close to his chest. Every time this happened, Remus felt so sad for the child who just so badly wanted to be loved by his parents and the teenager who so badly wanted to be loved.

“Moony?”

“Mhm?”

Sirius pulled away slightly. They weren’t hugging anymore but they were still close enough that Remus could feel the older boy’s breath on his face.

“Am I… unlovable?”

“What? Siri, of course you aren’t! You are… you’re so sweet and kind and you deserve the all the love in the world!”

Sirius sniffled and smiled lightly at Remus.

“I mean, anyone would be lucky to have you! I’m lucky to be your friend.”

The word pained the part of Remus that had a painful crush on Sirius, but now was most definitely not the time to think about that.

“You are so much better than those pureblood assholes who are probably a product of incest.”

Sirius was smiling properly now and Remus felt a burst of pride seeing him happy again.

“Moony?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you kiss me?”

Remus’ thoughts went a little bit like this:

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

DO I KISS HIM????? WHAT IF HE DOESNT LIKE ME BACK????

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

KISS HIM YOU DUMB BITCH

So he did. He pressed his lips against Sirius’ and it was everything he could ever dream it would be. Despite Sirius’ tear-tracked face. Despite Remus’ awkward position. Despite the fact that it was in the common room. It was perfect.

[bitchesloveangstimbitches]

Sirius tho (Chapter 3 of A Somnus for Your Thoughts)