anewkaiju

[anewkaiju]

Rain & Sunshine (a Premier League write up)

It's hard to say for sure whether my understanding of the game is developing, or if I'm just getting really good at consuming the right things. Last weekend, when I discovered that the North London derby would be taking place the following weekend, I made a note to myself to read up on this storied rivalry. Up to this point, I've spent a lot of time dwelling on the kits of Arsenal and Tottenham but considerably less time on the other aspects of these clubs. Having watched both clubs play a few times each so far this season, I was pretty aware that Spurs were coming in on the heels of back to back 3-0 defeats after starting with three straight victories right out the game and that Arsenal had opened the season with a string of losses but seemed to be crawling forward. Simply put, these teams were meeting one another at a pretty interesting time.

On Friday of last week, the Athletic put up a video breaking down the derby. They had their Arsenal writer and their Spurs writer on to discuss how each club got to the point where they are. The Arsenal writer acknowledged the the mammoth amounts of money that went into their new stadium, the departure of Arsene Wenger and the search for an identity since but still finished by saying "there seems to be a plan." For his part, the Spurs writer highlighted Tottenham's own wildly expensive stadium and the fact that the pandemic prevented fans from attending matches which in turn really fucked with Tottenham's cash flow. He talked about the coaching carousel of the last few years and how now Nuno Espirito Santo's preferred style of play doesn't work with the personnel that he's been assigned. Harry Kane was mentioned once or twice. Perhaps, most crucially, the Spurs writer from the Athletic kinda sorta said that Tottenham does not seem to have much of a plan.

The match itself on Sunday was just a lot of fun. As it went on, one of the television announcers kept saying that this was the scene of the rebirth of Arsenal, the renaissance of Arsenal, and at one point I think he called them Arsenal 2.0; it was all a blur, really. After not scoring in play all season, Arsenal hammered home three goals in the first half. The young roster looked positively electric. They reminded me of some of my favorite imperfect NBA teams from years past like the Darius Miles-led Clippers; squads that were on high on potential but that couldn't always get it together. The last time that I wrote I said that I felt bad for Ryan from Stadio for being a Pacers fan since he's also an Arsenal fan. All that I meant by that was these last two seasons finishing eight must have been hard since Arsenal usually compete for top four finishes. Setting those two eighth place finishes aside, there's a lot to really admire about Arsenal. For starters, according to Wikipedia, they have the most diverse fanbase of any football club on the planet. They have also had some really great kits like the bruised banana shirt (which I recently saw listed on Depop for $550) and this year's alternate (which I still maintain will look fire when paired with navy blue socks.)

It must just be weird to think about a club like Arsenal rebuilding in the first place. Are roster rebuilds common in the Premier League? Do teams blow it up? My suspicion is that this not the case. It seems like the unfathomably wealthy clubs stock talent so that they are prepared for any and all tournaments and then everyone else is left hanging on to whatever they can find while hoping that the youth can develop. My NBA-addled mind looks at the work that Arsenal has put in so far and their recent transfer activity and says "there seems to be a plan."

While the derby got a bunch of graphs here, I also enjoyed the matches on Saturday! Manchester City versus Chelsea already sounded like an awesome matchup, and that was before I discovered that City's schedule for the week was Chelsea, PSG and Liverpool or that one time Pep Guardiola and Thomas Tuchel got together for some hanging out that was so intense it intimidated everyone else in the bar. The match itself did not disappoint. I feel that I finally saw the City that everyone is always talking about. They were a joy to watch at times.

Speaking of joyous occasions, Manchester United lost to Aston Villa. As with in recent weeks, I found myself actively rooting for a Man U defeat. At around the 80th minute or so with the score still even, I sighed a little bit because recent weeks were fresh in my mind. "Time for the dumb, fucking smash and grab," I thought to myself. It was such a pleasant surprise to see that not take place. It was almost as nice as the Villa kits (which, not sure if this is a hot take or not but I think these away kits are even sharper than the claret and blue. The subtle pinstriping on the shirt really puts it over the top for me.)

Stepping into this week, I'm most curious to find out whether or not I'll see the City team that I saw take on Chelsea again. I'm also curious to see what shakes out on Attack on Titan but this isn't the blog for that.

[anewkaiju]

Two Worlds Become One (or how the search for a Premier League club is going)

They did a mailbag episode on Stadio today, and one of the questions submitted struck a chord with me. Someone wrote in to say that they lived in the United States and had just begun watching Premier League and that they were looking for advice on which team to throw their support behind. I did not submit this query, but I recognized the line of thinking.

"Think about what you love, your values or whatever and then try to find a team that aligns with that," is what Musa said and those words have been rattling around in my head all day. He went on to provide an NBA example, which helped me immeasurably. Now that I can follow, and his words on the Brandon Roy-era Portland Trail Blazers made me smile. If Musa weren't a Manchester United fan, I think I'd just take his words as gospel and follow him to Old Trafford. However, I can assure myself that won't happen.

Ryan, the other Stadio host, also provided an NBA example. He said that he was an Indiana Pacers fan but that it took that one playoff series against the Heat in 2013 to realize it. He actually referred to them as "my Pacers" which made feel a slight twinge of sadness since he's also an Arsenal fan. These last two years or so must have felt just incredibly long. At the same time, that yin yang balance of Arsenal and the Pacers doesn't sound so bad. In a lot of ways, that's where I would like to land with this. I wonder who the Washington Wizards of the Premier League are?

A quick online search tells me that, ha, The Athletic ran a piece that tackles this very subject. Unfortunately, it was written in June 2020 and somehow feels a little dated in parts. (Also, while holding myself back from a rant, a lot of what they say about the Wizards is tied to the John Wall era which is now very much over.) All that being said, there's a lot of good anecdotal and contextual information about Premier League clubs that I probably wouldn't be able to find elsewhere and the whole NBA comparison model provides something basic enough for me to follow along. (Without dwelling on the comps too much, I must admit I was a little saddened to see that Aston Villa and their great kits were assigned the Philadelphia 76ers as their counterpart. Without getting into it, I may live in Philadelphia but I carry a real disdain for the Sixers. It's a long story. Maybe some other day.)

Anyway, I wanted to share a few words on how my search for a club was going. Ryan really stressed that you can't get caught up in present day results. After all, this is partnership for life. His anecdote about realizing that the Pacers were his team made me realize that it's going to take me all season. We're only a few weeks into the season so far, and this campaign runs until next summer. There are so many ebbs and flows that have yet to take place. Put simply, there's just so much more to experience. So, for as much as I may admire the Aston Villa or Wolves kit and despite the fact that I seemingly only read about the Big Six or Seven, I still understand that this isn't something I can rush into and that right now is a time for absorbing. (Ryan also suggested watching more football than just Premier League and seeing what grabs you. Bundesliga, here I come.)

This weekend has cool matchups on the schedule, but my mind keeps gravitating toward the North London derby. I don't know if it's because I live in North Philadelphia (and apologies if I've mentioned this before) but there is part of me that wonders if I should throw my support behind either Arsenal or Tottenham. It wouldn't be a popular choice since all American soccer fans only root for Manchester United, Liverpool or City but that's part of the appeal, baby. Both clubs carry a lot of history with them, which is cool, and while each have seen some success here and there, neither have ever been the unquestioned best on the planet, which is the lane that I know best. Both have strong kits too. Oh no, is this what I love? Is this what my values revolve around? Kits?

[anewkaiju]

Psychic Wound (a Premier League write up)

It's a lot to take in, honestly. The action flows from end to end uninterrupted. The slightest touch can create chaos and heartbreak in an instant. Any and all storylines contain layers. Watching Premier League long enough in one sitting, and it all really does start to feel like that one Lord of the Rings meme. You don't just simply turn the television on and watch Prem; it's more of Matrix type thing. The only way to really do it is to plug in and immerse yourself. Or at least, that's how it feels after following this for the first month.

Watching West Ham versus Manchester United this morning, I was struck by how technically foreign all of this is to me. In some respects, I can feel my understanding and familiarity go up each week and I'm now able to connect some dots and fill in some blanks. However, a lot of the context continues to elude me. And to quote Tom Scharpling, from his memoir It Never Ends, "So many of the world's problems stem from a lack of context. If you can't understand who someone is, you will struggle to understand why they do the things they do." He's rather obviously not talking about football, but I think it's still applicable here. I can try and follow the ball as it moves up and down the pitch, but in most cases, I know precious little about the pitch itself. The history of the grounds and the tales that are told about classic matches from years past; that information isn't readily available, you have to dig for it. It's the same thing when it comes to the clubs. I can look at all the kits and listen to the crowd reaction and use that to try and find my squad, but in doing so, I run the risk of stepping over so much history. Most of these clubs have existed in some shape or another since the late 18 or early 1900s. Now, I don't expect to learn everything there is know about all of it, but at the same time, I do think that I should, at the very least, know the last 30 years pretty well. And it's bigger than the Premier League too; there's the Champions League, the FA Cup, the Europa (plus, a few that I probably don't even know about.)

Anyway, these thoughts were rattling around my head while I watched Premier League this morning. This was actually my first actual Premier League morning watching all of the matches live. After the other week against Leicester City, I was quite ready to watch Michail Antonio and West Ham take on Manchester United. He has been an absolute joy to watch, and while I may be new, at the same time I can say quite comfortably that Manchester United is my least favorite club in all of soccer. If I didn't already feel this way then I definitely did after the match was over. They snatched another one! This one was even more of a gut punch when you learn that Jesse Lingard, who hit the winner, spent last season on loan to West Ham and is still much beloved by their fan base (they gave him a standing ovation when he checked into the match.)

Another thing that I kept wrestling with all day while watching was the atmosphere of the crowds. Yesterday, the energy at Villa Park rose to a level normally reserved for Evangelion Unit 01 to grab the forks and bring about the next impact. The opening goal from Matty Cash was nice enough on its own, but it stirred something up in the Villa supporters. Then Leon Bailey checked in and took everything to another level. It sure look like he scored on that corner kick, but it was ruled an Everton own goal. Since he didn't get credit for it, Bailey went ahead and hammered home a beautiful, undeniable goal minutes later. The crowd was rapturous and the vibes were high.

That was the only match that I caught yesterday. After the West Ham versus Manchester United match ended, I threw in a load of laundry and got ready for Tottenham versus Chelsea, which by my count is my first derby. Based on the way they are talked about other places, I find myself pulling for Spurs, at least a little bit. This is definitely informed from watching the documentary series and learning about their squad. At the same time, though, as the guy I share a workspace with will tell you, I've caught every Chelsea match so far this season and think pretty highly of them too.

Today, Chelsea appeared inevitable. Like Thanos who came before them, they moved forward according to their own plan. Things were pretty close in the first half, and the broadcast team said that if there were an edge then you would have to give it to Spurs, who were playing without Japhet Tanganga who had to serve a one-match suspension for the red card from last week against Crystal Palace.

However, the second half was a different story. Thomas Tuchel put N'Golo Kanté into the match and things changed. Romelu Lukaku had a relatively quiet today, aside from the times that the commentators called attention to the fact that he wasn't dominating the game, and despite that, Chelsea still walked with relative ease out of Tottenham today. It's hard to say what went wrong for Spurs exactly, aside from Delle Ali not jumping when Tiago Silva went up for that first goal and then the ball careening off of Eric Dier for the second one. I can confirm that Heung-min Son and Harry Kane played and were active today, but am having a hard time recalling any real quality shots on goal.

So, that's how it went down this weekend. Somehow, I'm still no closer to a squad of my own. At my most honest, I would say that I have narrowed the league down to a handful of clubs but I still feel that I have a long way to go. Next week already looks strong with Manchester City and Chelsea locking up on Saturday and then a big North London throwdown on Sunday when Arsenal and Spurs meet.  

[anewkaiju]

You Can See Your Own Way Out (a Premier League write up)

Everyone finds their own club in their own way. This isn't a hot take, closer to a statement of fact. My cousin had a friend who went to study abroad in Newcastle, and in a show of solidarity, my cousin decided on that day that Newcastle United was his club.

I was thinking about my cousin a lot on Saturday. Most, if not all, Premier League coverage I've read so far this season has suggested that Newcastle are dangerously close to relegation. Amazingly, this may be a sunnier prognosis than what my cousin has described to me in recent weeks. A notoriously cheap owner. A director of operations who literally does nothing except hide. A manager effectively handcuffed by the owner and director of operations. A team without enough talent. A fanbase at their wit's end. Despite all of this, Newcastle United hung with Manchester United for nearly 60 minutes on Saturday at Old Trafford. A football match is 90 minutes, but still.

It felt inevitable when Cristiano Ronaldo struck first and gave Manchester United the early lead. However, Javier Manquillo's equalizer in the 55th minute was both unexpected and wildly pleasant. It turned the game back into a match. It felt like anything was possible. That being said, this feeling did not last long. Maybe two minutes after Manquillo's score, Ronaldo put one through Newcastle goalkeeper Freddie Woodman's legs (literally) and then the rout began. Apparently, after the match, Newcastle manager Steve Bruce used the post-match press conference as an opportunity to take on ownership, operations and the fans. He may or may have taken his shirt off to hammer home his point, but details are murky.

According to my cousin, this is the general Newcastle vibe. To me, the weirdest part is how accepted it all is. If an NBA team were this poorly managed from top to bottom, it would come up on television, on podcasts and behind paywalls all the time. Hell, last year, the Athletic did a whole eight-part podcast on James Dolan's tenure owning the New York Knicks (tl;dr: Dolan is a meddlesome asshat with garbage taste.)

On the pods that I've been spending time with, there's been a lot of talks in recent weeks about everything that's wrong with Arsenal, and on at least one pod, there have been a lot of jokes made about the money Arsenal has spent in the transfer market so far this season. The same pod also likes to shit on Tottenham for kinda the same thing: spending money but not winning. Look, I get it. Only a handful of football clubs can raise a trophy in a given year, and there's always the chance that the same team could take all the trophies. But does that mean all the other teams in the league simply shouldn't try? I've never understood this line of reasoning.

It crept up in the NBA a few years back when the Golden State Warriors were in full-on dynasty mode. When the season began, media outlets started running their annual predictions and every single analyst everywhere gave Golden State the title before a game was even played. Yes, they were overwhelming favorites but you mean to tell me that in the other 28 NBA locker rooms everyone just said "Well, gee, the Warriors are just too good. We may as well pack it in." That obviously did not happen. Teams continued to try. As fans, isn't this what we want? Strong competition throughout the league and then ever tighter races once the postseason begins.

Part of this may stem from the fact that I live in America and the only soccer fans around throw their support behind Manchester United, Manchester City or Liverpool. Honestly, the one pod that I listen to is based where I live and the dudes on there dunk on Arsenal and Tottenham with so much frequency that I have a feeling that one of them will be the club who I throw my support behind. This idea of dumping on teams for trying to be competitive makes little sense to me.

In my time reading about Prem, I've been struck by just how much of an outlier Leicester City was when they won the league. Were they mocked on their way to the top too? Are underdogs ever embraced or is all club soccer just awash in some sobering reality where there are only a handful of contenders?

There were some fun matches on Saturday. Tottenham versus Crystal Palace was fun until it wasn't anymore. Truth be told, all the business with Japhet Tanganga really bummed me out. Granted, I've only been a Tanganga diehard for about a month now but still. As mentioned earlier, Newcastle United versus Manchester United was pretty decent for the first 60 minutes or so before it all unraveled. I ended Saturday with Aston Villa versus Chelsea where highlights included: Aston Villa's kits which never get old, Romelu Lukaku scoring a goal with total ease which also never gets old. My football knowledge only goes as far back as the Euros, but in that short time, I still feel comfortable stating that Lukaku is the best goalscorer that I've seen in that time and that Chelsea are the strongest team I've seen as well. That being said, I am still not a Chelsea fan.

[anewkaiju]

Forever Find Flight (a Premier League write up)

Last week, someone told me that I was a Chelsea fan. We aren't particularly close but we were discussing my situation as a neutral. He asked me who the best team that I had seen so far was and I said "Chelsea" as their thrashing of Arsenal was still fresh in my mind. He said that's all it took, but I protested that I didn't want to be a frontrunner. He said that it wasn't that deep. Later on, I discovered that he's a United supporter. For what it's worth, I don't think I'm a Chelsea fan. That feels too easy. I may not be a Chelsea fan but there was no other alternative this past Saturday. Supporting Liverpool in any capacity is out of the question. I was basing this mostly off of a few Liverpool fans that I've encountered in life, but listening to footy podcasts, I sense that maybe no one likes Liverpool, aside from their own fans. Anyway, the match at Anfield saw ten men keep things even against eleven for 45 minutes and some change. It was pretty cool to watch, wildly gripping. At times, it looked like, even a man down, Chelsea might hammer home another goal and win the game. Truth be told, rooting against the idea of a Liverpool victory was maybe the most comfortable I've felt as a football fan yet.

I watched a fair chunk of Aston Villa versus Brentford on Saturday as well, but my stream was shaky which leaves my thoughts on the match incomplete. Brentford being back at the highest level after 74 years remains a great storyline and the team continues to play with an inspired energy. As always, the Aston Villa home kits looked wonderful. The end result of Sunday's Wolves versus United match was referred to as a "classic Manchester United smash and grab" on one of the footy podcasts that I spend time with, and my best guess is that refers to how the game was nil-nil for more than 80 minutes before Mason Greenwood hammered home the game-winner. All in all, it was a compelling back-and-forth where anything seemed possible until it wasn't. After that goal, there was a clear feeling that Wolves would not be able to match. It almost felt unfair. The game had been even for so long and then United went and took it all away. It's also unfair how fire those Manchester United away kits are, holy moly.

There's no Prem scheduled for this upcoming weekend due to the international break so not sure what I'm going to do here. At some point last week, I began watching the Amazon series on Tottenham. Without stating the obvious, it's cool to see how a Premier League club is run. I think I've mentioned this before, but the Tottenham home kits are fantastic (clean, simple and could not be anymore minimal.) This series has also served as my introduction to Jose Mourinho. Some additional research has led me to believe that opinions are mixed on the man. On the one hand, everything he says sounds great, equal parts inspiring and calm cool. On the other hand, there is evidence to the argument that he's quick to take all credit for the victories but equally swift in assigning blame when his club falls. I'm still figuring a lot of this out, but I found the Spurs to be a lot of fun to follow along with; it's still up in the air how much of that is on them and how much of that is the magic of television editing.

[anewkaiju]

Everybody Likes Something Good (a Premier League write up)

We have now run through two weeks of action, however, I am no closer to knowing where to place my allegiances. That being said, I remain undeterred. Over the last week, I watched Aston Villa versus Newcastle, Arsenal versus Chelsea, West Ham versus Leicester City and most of Wolves versus Tottenham. Also, last Friday, I spent my lunch break watching Manchester United versus Leeds again, but this time, paying more concentrated attention to what United were doing on the pitch.

The two football podcasts that I've been spending time with spent so much time last week raving about what happened at Old Trafford (where Manchester United play) that I began to wonder if I hadn't missed something. I struggled a bit when I watched the match the first time around because I already knew the finish so it was hard to get too excited watching shots that you absolutely know are going to find the back of the net. The second time around, I made a concerted effort to watch and follow Paul Pogba as moved around the pitch. In doing so, it was hard not to marvel at Bruno Fernandes as he racked up three goals with relative ease. It also helped seeing his tweet after the match where he said he had simply been waiting for fans to be present before registering his first hat trick. They looked so strong against Leeds but then they drew with Southampton, so there's some balance out there I suppose. While we are talking about Manchester United, we have to acknowledge their away kits which are just divine. However, all that being said, I cannot hop aboard the United train; the idea of it feels so boring.

The big highlight from the Aston Villa versus Newcastle match was not Villa's kits, although they remain pretty great, but rather the wild goal that ended the first half. It may still be early in the season, but there's no doubt that that was the best goal yet. It was picturesque. It's the sort of play that any fan of any sport can at least appreciate. In conducting research and reading around the internet, it seems that Villa are actually considered to be one of the cooler clubs around. At the very least, people who talk about football for a living seem to really want them to succeed this season after seeing Jack Grealish leave for Manchester City. It's my understanding that Villa spent the Grealish transfer money very wisely and really strengthened their club. Also, as mentioned before, their home kits are very nice and yesterday I discovered that their away kits are almost equally appealing. Villa Park was a lively atmosphere, and by all accounts, their owner is a pretty ok dude.

So, not to state the obvious, but Chelsea are incredibly strong and incredibly deep at every position. Saturday saw the return of Romelu Lukaku (he had played for the club before) and he made his presence felt almost immediately. He scored early, and probably could have scored again. Arsenal just looked powerless for much of the match. Despite finishing eighth last year, they managed to be Chelsea twice so there was a thought that perhaps they had Chelsea's number. They don't, or at least, they didn't on Saturday. They're a bit short on players at the moment, including a number of guys that they've paid handsomely for their services, but that doesn't really help explain away what happened on Saturday. That being said, that sure looked like a penalty on Saka there toward the end. It's hard to say when relief will arrive for Arsenal and its supporters as they are scheduled to take on Manchester City this upcoming weekend. Also, worth noting, I didn't love the Arsenal home kit as much as I expected. It's nice and plenty good, but the all white sleeves and red base moving around came across a little too disconnected for my tastes. Still, it's hard not to feel for Arsenal and their supporters as they struggle like this so early in the campaign.

Leading up to yesterday's match, Leicester City had really emerged in my mind as a club to watch. Their outsider status is great, Jamie Vardy is great, Jannik Vestergaard is great, their coach seems intense but in a one-step-ahead-of-everyone tactician kind of way. However, for as much as I appreciate these various things about the club, the fit still felt a little off. Maybe it's the other teams, organizations and people in my life that I throw my support behind. Historically speaking, I almost never ride with a team that other people like or appreciate (your loss, folks. The Baltimore Orioles and Washington Wizards are fantastic franchises and I will continue to run with them.) Anyway, yesterday happened and West Ham just rocked Leicester City. This was my first time seeing West Ham in action, so it's hard for me to say if yesterday's effort was in line with their usual output or what, but I do know that they finished directly right behind Leicester City in the standings last season so I'm inclined to think, yes, they are in fact a highly competitive club. Declan Rice seems like a real stand-up guy, talking with everyone throughout and helping to de-escalate things after the red card. Their kits are also claret and blue, which as has already been documented here, is just great.

If there was a battle of kits this week then it was, hands down, Wolves versus Tottenham. The Wolves kits aren't mind-blowing or revolutionary or anything like that, but yellow and black is a great, sharp color combination. Also, their full name, the Wolverhampton Wanderers sounds like something out of Harry Potter (please note: this not an endorsement of Harry Potter or its distressingly transphobic creator.)

Tottenham were the away team in this match, which means that they wore their away kits. Simply put, they are awesome. Their home kits are so clean, which is great in its own way, but these away ones look like they'd come alive underneath a black light. In reading about the Spurs, I've gleamed that their supporters don't seem to know what to make of them anymore. Some fans have posted online that the club should let Harry Kane go and fill his trophy case as Tottenham aren't really poised to compete for the title this year. Other fans come across as far more mystified and unsure what the answer for the Spurs is or what that would even look like. All I've learned about the owner is that he refuses to agree to a Kane transfer. I think I said this before, but it bears repeating. I'm very hesitant to take the side of a rich, white guy but it would just be so dull if another star player joined the Man City roster.

Speaking of Man City, they'll take on Arsenal this upcoming Saturday in a match that will probably be talked about tons between now and then.

[anewkaiju]

Ocean of Tenderness (a Premier League write up)

On Friday night, Brentford football club returned to top flight action for the first time in 74 years. There was a man in stands who attended that last high match in 1947. He's now 88 years old. There were also plenty of people aged four, seven, 19, 44 and on who were positively joyous as Brentford took it to Arsenal en route to a 2-0 victory.

It's hard to say how Arsenal supporters might be feeling after this match. A perennial powerhouse, for what feels like all of my life, the club was finished eighth in each of their last two campaigns. On Friday, they spent almost the entire match passing the ball backward and hesitating. Things picked up a little when Bukayo Saka finally entered the competition, but it was a little late by that point.

There's an argument to be made that it wasn't all bad for Arsenal. Their kits look pretty great, and will look ever better when they're finally able to pair them with blue socks as they had originally intended. Historically speaking, Arsenal kits look anywhere from pretty good to absolutely fantastic

All in all, the opening match of the season left me with plenty to think about and ruminate on as I made my way through the weekend. I was in New York from Saturday though Monday, but managed to catch Tottenham vs Manchester City live, and then once home, I watched recordings of both Manchester United vs Leeds United and Leicester City vs Wolves.

Of the three, Sunday morning's Spurs vs City was the standout match for me. In case, you haven't spent the last six weeks reading about footy as I have, there was a fair amount of drama heading into this match. Put simply, Tottenham standout Harry Kane is eager to taste championship glory, doesn't think it'll happen with the Spurs and would like to go suit up for Man City where he will almost assuredly fill up his empty trophy case. Standing in his way is Tottenham's wildly stubborn owner who is vehemently opposed to such a move. The reporting on this comes so fast, furious and frequent but I'm pretty sure that the Tottenham owner said that a Kane transfer to City would only happen over his dead body. I am loathe to take the side of an old, rich, white guy but it'd be pretty boring if Kane went over to the wildly, stacked Manchester City.

Anyway, the match was blast. Spurs were clearly eager to make a statement, got on the board when the moment struck and then held on to win the match. Simply put, Japhet Tanganga was amazing. Also, Tottenham Hotspur wear some really, truly lovely kits. So clean, they really make me pause.

This might have come up in the last missive, so apologies if I'm just repeating myself, but my head keeps telling me that Leicester City could be my club. They framed as underdogs .Their manager wears a suit and takes fastidious notes while the match is going on around him. One of their top players is a self-described "mad man" who spent his offseason gardening and drinking beer. His pre-match ritual involves double shots of espresso, three cans of Red Bull and an omelette. How is everyone on the planet not a Leicester City supporter? Objectively speaking, they played well but it was nothing mind-blowing. I could say the same about their kits too. On the other end of the pitch, the old gold and black Wolves kits is highly attractive but I'm having a hard time telling how I feel about the club.

It's unclear which matches will be on my television this weekend, but I will return.

[anewkaiju]

Deep Distance Dawn (a Premier League write up)

The pattern is always the same time after time. An international football tournament, the World Cup or the Euro (and maybe to a lesser extent the Olympics,) takes place and positively captures my imagination. For the entire length of the tourney, I'm rapt with attention on my couch. When it ends, I tell myself that that we keep it going and follow the action on the club level. It happens maybe one Sunday morning.

On many levels, the Premier League and I appear to be a dynamite match. To put it lightly, I am an NBA obsessive. I spend morning, noon and night pouring over an aggregated Twitter feed of basketball musings and rumors. It's not just the on-the-court aspects of basketball that I love, but also everything that surrounds it. The players. The uniforms. Coaching drama. Upset fans. The whole lot, I'm here for it. I noticed fairly early on that with the more hoops that I watched, the deeper that I got and the more I started to notice. The players are right there in front of you, no helmets or hats or pads. After enough time, you start to get a sense of their personalties (on-the court at least, I'm not trying to speak for anyone.) Correct me if I'm wrong, but everything in this paragraph could be applied to following the Premier League. The only thing holding me back is my lack of affiliation, I reckon. In the past, when I would timidly try to watch, without a real, rooted interest, the whole operation just steamrolled right over me. However, that ends today. The buck stops here, as some like to say. I'm diving in.

Since this is my first, honest foray into the Premier League, I'm acknowledging this head-on and am wondering in as a neutral. The only teams that I know for sure that I will not be supporting are: Millwall, Manchester United, Manchester City and Liverpool.

Beyond that, I consider myself pretty open and have been conducting a fair amount of research. Admittedly, a lot of my research thus far has centered around who has the most notorious fans and why and who has the best looking uniforms (sorry, kits.) So far, I reckon that there are few early favorites but I still maintain that I will watch for weeks before I truly, know my club.

Years ago, I used to play FIFA with my brother and always ran with Aston Villa as they have fantastic kits (claret and blue, * chef's kiss *) However, first choice for video game competition doesn't exactly sound like the best basis for picking your football club. What if someone asks me? It's entirely possible that I end up a Villa fan at the end of the day, but I want to do the leg work first. The Crystal Palace home kit might be my favorite of everything I've seen heading into the season, I am enchanted by those slanted lines.

The other kits that caught my eye also carry a lot of history with them, and concerns two long-time rivals. Both Arsenal and Tottenham Hotspur have exceptionally clean kits. Arsenal has also gone with some exceptional kits in years past too (bruised banana, baby.)

In terms of competing on the field (sorry, pitch,) Leicester City carries with it a certain amount of appeal. Squarely outside the so-called Top Four except when Arsenal and Spurs are competitive and then it's Big Six, Leicester City has crashed the party before and haven't gone away in recent years. Also, just today, they announced they had acquired my third favorite player from this past Euro, defender and, also giant, Jannik Vestergaard (unfortunately my favorite player from this past Euro, Paul Pogba is on Manchester United and my second favorite player from this past Euro, Raheem Sterling suits up for Manchester City.) Again, it's entirely possible that I end up here but still I need to do my due diligence.

There's part of me that suspects I may get caught up in Chelsea's march for the title. There's near unanimous consensus that Chelsea, City, Manchester United and Liverpool will finish in the top four of the standings with Chelsea and City duking it out. It's a possibility so I'm not dismissing it.

Anyway, Brentwood meets Arsenal tomorrow. This blog was (probably) never a blog worth blogging about and now it's a blog about football

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Ip Man: An Appreciation

Word might finally be out on this one. This video certainly has a high number of views on it. For years, Donnie Yen and the Ip Man franchise were criminally slept upon. Dig a little deeper, and discover that Donnie Yen has a dizzying body of work, all of it kung fu related. He also served as the fight choreographer on Blade II, which we all know is fantastic. It's one of those things where the man was absolutely on top and one of the very best action starts on the planet, making movie after movie, and yet, most outlets still opted to focus on fossils like Stallone. Put another way, the time spent telling me about The Expendables franchise would have been better spent telling me about the work of Donnie Yen. His entire body of work is great, but it always comes back to Ip Man. The whole franchise works because the premise is so ironclad excellent. There was an actual person known as the Ip Man, and he was the absolute master of this martial arts technique known as Wing Chun. He taught Bruce Lee everything he knows (seriously, no bullshit. Similar to how Dr. Simmons taught every journalism class I ever took and thus taught me everything I know about journalism, Ip Man did the same for Bruce Lee.) Ok, back to why the Ip Man franchise rules So, there are four films in the series. The first one came out in 2008 or so and is for all intents and purposes a biographical picture, with a few scenes tweaked for cinematic reasons. The second one came out two years later, and moved even further away from actual fact. The third one has Mike Tyson in it. Basically, they took an already cool story and then turned the protagonist into a super hero which makes the whole thing infinitely more cooler. The fourth came out at the tail end of last year. I saw it in the theater was one of four people there. It was me, an obviously very cool uncle who had brought his preteen niece and nephew, and some other guy who ended up taking his shoes off at one point. The movie started off a little slow, making a real effort to tie off and close any and all loose ends or dangling threads from any of the other three movies in the series. Eventually, it hits its stride. During the big final battle, they start playing Ip Man's "theme" music, the anthem that has closed all the other films in the franchise. In this moment, Ip Man gathers himself one last time and then knocks this dumbass army commander into next week. As this was happening, there were maybe tears on my face. The last scene in Ip Man 4 highlights something else essential about the series. For whatever reason, it is just deeply satisfying to watch Donnie Yen punch dude after dude in the throat. The grace with which he moves is equal parts astonishing and mesmerizing. There's a real beauty to his flow, so much so that you forget that he's breaking arms and legs left and right. There won't be anymore Ip Man movies starring Donnie Yen. That was it. For the sake of time, we skipped over the "other" Ip Man movie series as those films do not include Donnie Yen.

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Top Chef Los Angeles Recap: Episode 1

These are strange times. There has always been an element of the unknown to our day-to-day, but typically it's only ever discussed or thought about in terms of limitless potential and never-ending, never-ceasing possibility. Of course, there's also always been a flip side to that element of unknown. You know it. The dread-inducing one. The one no one ever wants to bring up, delve into, wrestle with, or even talk about really. It's hard to say for sure, but that may be where we are now. Or maybe it isn't, and all will be well eventually. This shit is so strange and is going to take time to figure out, but we all have to figure it out and our best chance at figuring it out is considering our community and working together. So, we got that going for us.

These are also strange times that require certain measures to be taken to keep everything hammered down and in place. Put another way, a little TV is needed in order to provide some sort of sense of stability. Put yet another way, it'll help keep shit together. Which is how, we have ended up here. For reasons that are not entirely clear to me (yet) an idea formed in front of me that this latest season of Top Chef (the 17th one) needs to be written about. So, here we are.

The first thing to note about the new season of Top Chef is that it is an All-Star season, which just means that these are all contestants who have been on the show before and have now been invited back. This raises immediate questions in my mind concerning how one becomes a Top Chef All-Star. On what basis exactly is a chef measured to make this sort of call? This doesn't feel like something we can compare to the NBA's All-Star selection process. There, they have the fans for the starters and then league coaches and members of the press vote for the reserves. So, with this cast, are we supposed to believe these are fan favorites or have these chefs been chosen because the people who watch food most closely believe them to be the best? Little of both?

One of the other things about Top Chef and watching Top Chef, at least for me, is that maybe that stuff doesn't matter. You could try to handicap this show and identify the frontrunner and the number one contender and track everyone's progress through that lens, but that grows old eventually. In my mind, the show is at its best when someone is dialed in and making what feels like the best food they've ever made in their entire life. A lot of the time this individual making what feels like the best food they've ever made is painted as the underdog, and that's fine. Watching an underdog zig and zag their way through a competition, defy the odds and then take the title makes for pretty good entertainment. It's also one of those things where there's a lot of talk about James Beard nominations and "features in Food & Wine magazine" and it all sounds really impressive, but what do those accolades actually mean, and more importantly for our purposes, what do those accolades mean for TV? Where's your resume when you're cooking in the snow on the side of a mountain? Also, what does pedigree matter when so often on this show the judges slam someone for cutting corners or ignoring fundamentals? It's also important to note that I know almost nothing about food aside from what I have discerned from watching this show.

How food is thought about and talked about on TV and the internet has changed considerably over the last few years. In the early to mid 2000s, 'good cooking' was more often than not presented and defined as all about splashy presentation, style and a million other things going on at once. The term "celebrity chef" originated around this time to describe someone who is now famous because they cook. Your signature could just be a wild looking plate. This isn't meant to put down food artists, but perhaps some passes were given that shouldn't have been. It's like if you could talk it up enough and find the right wrapping for it then, magically, no questions are asked and what you are putting out into the world doesn't have to be fact or quality checked. This all works on the timeline too as this was also a period in history were there lots of bad rappers at the top (50 Cent, Ja Rule, etc) and the NBA was mired in this weird post-Jordan funk.

It's almost as if things had to pivot back in on itself. These days, simplicity is celebrated. Or maybe it has always been essential and I am just dumb. Either way, let's call this foggy idea the Chef's Table Effect. Now, with chefs, you want to know about their approach to food and what their mindset is like. We want to know how they look at food and how they get it. We want to learn about real, living, breathing chefs and not just be told about someone who is now famous because they cook. In early seasons of Top Chef, there were more personalties, people who just wanted to rub elbows with celebrities and put their names on restaurants. Over time, that has subsided some and when it does happen it comes across as much more transparent. The good chefs emerge no matter what. Their personalties reveal themselves in their own time (call this the Kawhi effect if you must,) and because they are making 'good' food it's all that much more enjoyable/rewarding to watch. We are in this time where food is considered in more serious terms, and as a result, we get more grounded, thoughtful food TV programming. I like to think of it as more of an actual uprising. Everyone collectively all at once had one too many exploding shrimp cocktails bathed in brandy and bedded in dry ice and began asking questions about what we are doing here exactly. With that in mind,

The episode itself was fairly straight-forward. The chefs show up. They are asked to do a mise en place, which is like a prep work drill essentially but since this is a competition show there's a real emphasis on speed and accuracy. There were artichokes, oranges and almonds, and it was explained, that the first five chefs to break down their artichokes would form a team and be allowed to leave for a kitchen right away. When this happens, all remaining chefs would stop with whatever artichoke business they may have left and shift their attention to the oranges. Once five chefs had handled their oranges sufficiently they would then become the second team and then be allowed to head for the kitchen. Everyone left with the almonds would take on the mantle of the third team, and be allowed to move to the kitchen once they were all finished. This opening challenge served mostly as a shakeout session to get things moving and for viewers at home to see if anyone is trying out a new style, whether it be a cooking flourish or a new haircut.

After the mad dash mise en place, the chefs are once again sorted into teams, although, this time around, they go into five teams of three as opposed to three teams of five. For the main challenge of this episode, each team has been asked to make a cohesive, family-style seafood meal over a single open flame and an open flame only for a table of esteemed, established chefs and cuisine writers.  

here is what they presented:

Melissa: Grilled Swordfish with hot & sour sauce, ember grilled radicchio and fresno chiles

Karen: Grilled scallops, gingered plums, nuoc cham and nappa cabbage slaw

Angelo: West coast oyster with smoked bacon rice porridge

Bryan: Sea urchin, spot prawns with hibiscus ponzu and burnt avocado

Joe: Sesame and semolina flatbread with clams, fried garlic, sea urchin, pickled peppers and miso parmesan aioli

Lee Anne: Shoyu Tare Glazed Halibut with charred sweet corn and cabbage, sea urchin and uni miso beurre blanc

Gregory: Charred salmon with grilled peaches and roasted chili dressing

Jamie: Steamed mussels with ember scaled cream and toasted bread

Stephanie: Brined prawn with charred tomato sauce and roasted corn dressing

Jennifer: Spiced tuna loin over grilled kale with red pepper tahini sauce

Nini: Grilled scallops, carrots, tomatoes with charred brussels sprout & fennel salad

Kevin: Eye of swordfish braised in chorizo with coal-roasted onion, olives and peas

Lisa: Charred shrimp and scallop ceviche with candied squash, mushrooms and avocado

Bryan V.: Sablefish with corn porridge and charred leeks

Eric: Chesapeake boil with grilled prawn

It's striking looking at all of these dishes written out. Granted, this is being written from a position of hindsight, but it's so clear which dishes were a hit and which were not. Again, I'm not very bright so this isn't a food know-how thing. It's just a words thing. The most composed, concise dishes were the ones that elicited acclaim. This should maybe be a working rule. If the description of your dish runs over a line long, then you might be in trouble. (You might be looking at Lisa's dish and noticing that it runs over, but it's just barely. She's a great chef who is being oddly slept-on already. She went all the way to the final in her season and has a very no nonsense, quiet drive.)

Anyway, the judges loved Gregory, Jamie and Stephanie's meal with Gregory taking the overall win. Joe, Lee Anne and Bryan had far and away the least liked dish. The challenge called for a family-style meal, indicating that everything will end up on the same plate, so the two sauces made that one flatbread mad soggy. Joe went home for it. (Lee Anne ran into some issues on the grill, but these things happen and Padma said there was a lot to like about her dish. Lee Anne was also on the very first season of Top Chef and the last time anyone saw her was a few seasons back when she surprise-returned. In that episode, the challenge was to cook over an open flame in four feet of snow on the side of a Colorado mountain. Lee Anne was four months pregnant. After she knocked out her dish, she seemingly achieved clarity and announced to everyone that she was going home to prepare for the birth of her child.)

For whatever reason, it tends to take a few episodes before the show really starts moving. There will probably be a few more wild-sounding challenges under even more wild-sounding circumstances. Based off of the "this season on Top Chef" tease shown at the end of the episode, the competitors visit at least one museum and at least one stadium. The official title of this season is Top Chef: Los Angeles which would suggest that everything will be contained to the city of Los Angeles as opposed to the entire state.

There was also a moment in the tease where actor Danny Trejo, star of Machete, Machete Kills and the forever-stuck-in-development Machete In Space, can clearly be seen visiting the Top Chef kitchen which is wildly encouraging.

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It's true. It has been ages since we posted anything. There's good news, though. For starters, Gary just got a new drawing board and work space. At some point, he'll actually sit down at it.

Secondly, we're working on something new. The setting is the "end of days," and it's pulpy and noir-ish and there's alcohol and a desire to survive involved. Put simply, it's going to be rad. Hoping to roll it out in early 2014. Let's shoot for February. 

Ok for now...

CB

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dude has skills

Lou

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