aspecassasin

[aspecassasin]

wishing my demisexual king neil fucking josten a good asexual awareness week. i hope he continues to obsess over andrew’s capable shoulders and the way the sunlight reflects on his hair casting golden halos around him like something out of a fucking baroque painting. go shine king

[aspecassasin]

On Friendship.

[aspecassasin]

Source | Day 151

[aspecassasin]

happy ace week to everyone but this post is specifically for:

the aspecs who don't know what the fuck is up with their sexual attraction

the aspecs who don't understand attraction at all

the aspecs who bounce around between labels and can never pick one that fits you

basically all the aspecs who have ever been confused abt their asexuality

you're fucking VALID and i support you!! i know it sucks to be confused and to not know how to describe your experience. it's going to work out, i promise. and in the meantime, try not to get TOO hung up on labels. they're meant to help us understand ourselves, not to define us. you're amazing 💜

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[aspecassasin]

am i aceflux? am i graysexual? am i demisexual? am i aegosexual? am i even acespec??

i’m so confused.

[aspecassasin]

Ngl I've been loving these "hear me out" cakes bc they validate me xD. That's 90% of my crushes lol (but also makes me realise this is probably not how they feel about real crushes.)

Bc like... i felt the same about kovu as probably most of my crushes in my formative years 💀💀

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Not gonna lie friends. I would like to feel desired and feel like someone’s first choice

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Not to be dramatic...

But genuinely how tf do people find people they want to date and how in hell does the shit they go through feel worth it when their partners suck/they have nothing in common?????? Like??? What drives people to date??? Why aren't friends better???

[aspecassasin]

Friends with benefits but the benefits are cuddling and watching how to train your dragon

[aspecassasin]

To anybody that I accidentally do this to, pls lmk and I'll remove my tags if I agree. Bc yeah ^^ I'm someone who sits in several different things with my aceness and sometimes I view posts as connected to a certain part of my identity that others don't agree it should sit.

I believe in the rights to categorize for myself, but I also don't want to accidentally do something ignorant

Being aroace, sometimes I have to remind myself to not accidentally tag aro posts as ace and vice versa, because I know that will piss people off, but they've always been very closely linked for me.

Anyway, love loses!!

[aspecassasin]

Random AroAce Thoughts

So only a few years ago did I realize I was aroace (which is hilarious because it was super obvious, but I just never knew the terms for it).

I just wanted to put a few random things about my experience on here lol

I’m assuming I’m not the only one who pretended to have crushes when I was a kid. Like I would pick out some random person I thought was vaguely interesting and say I had a crush on them because I legitimately thought that was what everyone else did. The idea that other people actually felt romantic attraction (much less sexual attraction) to other people was wild to me when I found out I was an exception.

The interesting thing is that for a while, after I realized I’d never had a crush on a real person, I legitimately thought that I had real crushes on fictional characters. And there’s actually some merit to this since I definitely do get strong feelings towards certain fictional characters (I also definitely feel aesthetic attraction, pretty boys are the best).

The thing is, I don’t think it’s really a crush in the traditional sense of the word? Once I realized that romantic attraction means that you would want to be in a romantic relationship with someone/do romantic things with them, I realized that wasn’t the case for me. I never had those desires towards these characters, I just really loved them.

So I’m not sure if what I feel is a sort of alterous or platonic attraction to certain characters, or if I just get really really hyperfixated on some of them to the point it seems like attraction because the feelings are so strong.

Not completely sure. It’s interesting to think about though, and I guess I’ll always be learning new things about myself.

[aspecassasin]

Also, I love having crushes on people, but the idea of them liking me back is just... what tf am I even supposed to do with that.???

I've genuinely never had a crush vocally like me back that I wanted to like me back.. bc truly the second the (validation) disappears, idk wtf I'm supposed to do with that??????

[aspecassasin]

Ok but at least 5x a week I question if I'm aspec or if just everyone I interact with is not attractive in a sexual/romantic way bc their personalities suck...? Like?? I get it's been YEARS but... isn't it possible the pool just is absolutely awful?????

[aspecassasin]

AroAce Experiences Bingo (blank card) - How aroace are you?

[aspecassasin]

Aromantic Experiences Bingo (blank card) - How aromantic are you?

[aspecassasin]

HAPPY AEGOSEXUALITY AWARENESS DAY!!!