athzhowakar

[athzhowakar]

Why did Alicent fear that Rhaenyra or Daemon would kill her children if they took the throne?

Imagine you are Alicent Hightower, living in a brutal medieval world where having royal children does not mean they are safe it means they are always in danger. Your sons are not ordinary boys; they are potential claimants to the Iron Throne. Even if they never try to take power themselves, other people could easily use them as symbols to start a rebellion. Just their existence makes them a threat.

This is not something George invented out of thin air. It happened again and again in real medieval history. One of the most striking examples was Henry VII of England. When he defeated Richard III and became king, he married Elizabeth of York to unite the rival houses of Lancaster and York. But he knew that her relatives the Plantagenets still existed, and that made them dangerous. They were children, but their blood alone was enough to endanger his rule.

Edward Plantagenet, the ten-year-old son of George, Duke of Clarence, had never plotted or fought against Henry. He was only a boy locked away in the Tower of London because of who his father was. Historian Alison Weir, in The Princes in the Tower, writes:

“Edward of Warwick was kept in the Tower all his life because he was the last male Plantagenet of the senior line, and his mere existence posed a threat to Henry VII’s claim.”

In 1499, when Edward was almost thirty, he was accused of conspiring with a pretender and executed almost certainly to remove the threat once and for all.

Medieval rulers believed that a rival claimant was like a weapon lying around waiting for someone to pick it up. You could pretend it wasn’t dangerous, but eventually, someone would use it. If you left that claimant alive, you were leaving the door open to future war. This logic was not personal cruelty; it was how dynastic politics worked. Thomas Penn, in Winter King, described Henry VII’s paranoia this way:

“It was not cruelty but necessity… the safety of his dynasty depended upon the removal of all claimants.”

When you look at Alicent’s actions in Fire & Blood, you can see the same pattern. She knew that if Rhaenyra took the throne, her sons Aegon, Aemond, and Daeron would never be truly safe. Even if Rhaenyra herself promised mercy, her allies like Daemon and Corlys Velaryon would always see the Greens as a danger to be eliminated. The lords of Westeros would never fully trust that the old king’s sons would stay quiet. The truth is that if Rhaenyra had won, it would only have been a matter of time before someone demanded that Alicent’s children be killed or imprisoned, just like Henry VII did to Edward Plantagenet.

This is why the Dance of the Dragons spiraled into violence so quickly. It was not simply about personal pride or ambition. It was about survival. Alicent understood that once Viserys died, the question of succession was not a polite disagreement it was a fight to the death between her family and Rhaenyra’s. People often say, “Alicent started the war,” but in that world, any claim against the chosen heir meant war, no matter what the claimant said they intended.

It is easy to stand outside the story and call her actions monstrous, but if you were in her place if you knew your children were likely to be executed or locked away for life what would you have done? Would you have sat quietly and trusted that your enemies would spare your children forever? Or would you have tried to secure your family’s survival first, even knowing it could mean bloodshed?

When you look closely at the way medieval politics worked, you see Alicent did what almost any ruler or mother in her position would have done. She acted because she understood that in Westeros, like in real history, mercy was a luxury no one could afford when the survival of your house was at stake.

People who think the Greens could have lived happily ever after if Rhaenyra became queen clearly haven’t opened a damn history book. I honestly don’t understand what makes anyone believe the Blacks and Greens could have played happy families under Rhaenyra’s rule, living together in peace. But Viserys knew this!! that’s why he never named Rhaenyra his Hand and effectively kept her isolated on Dragonstone…

[athzhowakar]

reblog if you're corny and insufferable

[athzhowakar]

"Why look at other women when your sister is the hottest one in the town?"

~ Jaehaerys I, probably

"My sister is hot but she keeps beating me whenever I don't listen to her. I want a different wife!"

~ Aegon I, probably

"NO DAD! INCEST IS WINCEST!"

~ Jaehaerys II, probably

"He was refusing to wear a damn chainmail under his clothes for his protection. I had to beat him bloody to remind him not to argue with his elder sister."

~ Visenya, probably

"Shut up, fat man."

~ Jaehaerys I when someone told him that marrying his sister was gross.

Aegon the Conqueror literally married Rhaenys just because he wanted. Most of the incestuous marriages were actually done just because (obviously excluding Rhaena the Black Bride, Helaena, Naerys, Rhaella, these women where horrifically abused). They continued to do it long after all the dragons died, let’s be real.

They did it for the funsies/j

[athzhowakar]

I need to read a fanfiction written by a man.

I have read numerous ‘House of the Dragon’, ‘A Song of Ice and Fire’ and ‘Fire and Blood’ fanfictions written by women. As a matter of fact, I have only read fanfictions written by women. I have never seen fanfictions written by men in my recommendations, feed or anything. Now I want to read fanfiction written by men. So, people of Tumblr, guide me to them. Reveal those fanfictions to me so that I know how men imagine the works of one of the greatest fantasy writers who by some twisted irony of fate, was a man himself.

[athzhowakar]

Thank you for the tag @coffeebooksrain18

how does the fandom see you? make this picrew and take this uquiz and let everyone know who you truly are :’)

thank you for the tag, @oldermenfucker! 🌼

random no pressure tags: @wesandresons, @bouncehousedemons, @exitpursuedbyavulcan, @theold-ultraviolence, @vhagar-balerion-meraxes, @thought--bubble, @withthepillsandthedogs, @mermaidslabyrinth, @zaldritzosrose ✨

[athzhowakar]

I guess it is a curse. But the curse isn't meant for the whole of you...just the cancerous cells.

cure of ra

[athzhowakar]

I don't know if you can answer but why is Selim II regarded as a bad sultan? Why some historian weigh up the Sultante of Woman as the reason for the empire decadence? Are there still ottoman records without unveil?

Selim II was a sedentary sultan who had been preceded by the greatest conqueror of the Ottoman dynasty. If you look at the other great conqueror - Mehmed II - his son Bayezid II is too considered a bad sultan.

I hope you'll forgive me for this never-ending quote from Pinar Kayaalp-Aktan, but I think she captures the whole thing very well:

"Selim was forty-two years of age when he became Padishah and reigned for eight years. His relatively short sultanate drew a disproportionate amount of criticism, although his way of handling the affairs of the state was not substantively different from that of Suleyman, who delegated much of his power to the central bureaucracy in the second part of his reign. The difference between the two sultanates consisted of the nature and magnitude of the internal and external variables that impacted on the superpower status of the Empire and the remarkable adjustments by the administrative elite to counteract these crises. [...] The criticism that Selim summarily delegated his prerogatives to the Divan belies the fact that he did not disassociate himself from its workings much more than his predecessors. One significant difference was that Selim did not go on any military campaigns [...]. Selim’s personal life style was another source of opprobrium. His penchant for wine, neglect of Friday prayers, and favoring his gentlemen-in-waiting were all construed as evidence of his disrespect for royal customs. Actually, Selim was neither the first nor the worst imperial drinker in Ottoman history. The earliest evidence of Ottoman sultans imbibing wine is traced to Orhan Gazi (1324-1362) when the Genoese envoys presented him with more than a thousand gallons of Triglia wine in 1351. Bayezid I’s grandson Murad II (1421-1451) also appears to have inherited the family’s fondness for alcohol, as did Suleyman the Magnificent, who only towards the end of his life abandoned his early preoccupation with luxurious attires, music, gold and silver tableware, and wine. Nevertheless, Selim’s unabashed display of drinking at the outset of his inauguration ceremony particularly offended Islamic sensibilities. [...] As for Selim’s second transgression, poor attendance record at mosque, he was again not the first sultan to ignore this cardinal Islamic duty. Bayezid I (1389-1402) was refused by Molla Fenari to stand as a witness at the shari’a court Fenari presided in Bursa on the grounds that the Sultan had summarily given up the practice of public prayer. [...] Selim’s third vice, his overindulgent attitude towards his cronies and favorites, was deemed to produce the most serious consequences for the Ottoman state. Sokollu, who was the most notable among the favorites, drew a lot of criticism in this regard. In the 1573 relazione mentioned earlier Garzoni depicts the Grand Vizier as unduly favored by Selim and blames the Sultan with obvious neglect for promoting someone who “is hated by everybody, ... abhorred by the people, and ill-considered by the grandees.” The charge of favoritism was extended beyond the members of the Divan to include any person too close to the Sultan. [...] Putting the real or perceived foibles of Selim's aside, the lack of Ottoman military success during his reign was a recurrent source of criticism. Such accusations did not take into consideration that the Ottoman military muscle simply reached the limits of the premodem requirements of transportation and ordnance. Considering this reality, the Ottoman military record under the leadership of Selim, his Divan, and serdars did not fare as badly as was often expressed. On the western front, Chios was wrested from the Genoese and Cyprus from the Venetians. In the east, two territories the Porte previously had lost its grip on, Yemen and Tunis, were brought back within the Ottoman fold. In the northwest, a pact negotiated with Austria legitimized the capture of Szeged by Suleyman and required Emperor Maximilian to pay 30,000 ducats in addition to a yearly tribute of 2,000. On the southeast, another pact signed with Venice established Ottoman sovereignty over Cyprus and charged the Venetians to pay a yearly tribute of 300,000 florins. On the debit side, the decimation of the Ottoman naval force by a joint Christian armada in Lepanto inflicted a heavy blow to Ottoman sovereignty over the Mediterranean, though the Porte quickly assembled a new fleet that proved instrumental in recapturing the important fort of La Goletta in Tunis.”

The short answer to "why do some historian weigh up the Sultanate of Women as the reason for the empire decadence?" is: misogyny. The long answer is provided by Leslie Peirce: 

“The rise to power of the imperial harem is one of the most dramatic developments in the sixteenth-century history of the Ottoman Empire. From almost the beginning of the reign of Suleyman the Magnificent, who came to the throne in 1520, until the mid-seventeenth century, high-ranking women of the Ottoman dynasty enjoyed a degree of political power and public prominence greater than ever before or after. Indeed, this period in the empire's history is often referred to, in both popular and scholarly literature, as "the sultanate of women."' The women of the imperial harem, especially the mother of the reigning sultan and his leading concubines, were considerably more active than their predecessors in the direct exercise of political power: in creating and manipulating domestic political factions, in negotiating with foreign powers, and in acting as regents for their sons. Furthermore, they played a central role in what we might call the public culture of sovereignty: public rituals of imperial legitimation and royal patronage of monumental building and artistic production. If the prominence of the imperial harem is a notable feature of the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries, it is also one of the most misunderstood. Modern historical accounts of this period have tended to represent the influence of the harem as an illegitimate usurpation of power that resulted from a weakening of the moral fiber and institutional integrity of Ottoman society and that in turn contributed to problems plaguing the empire toward the end of the sixteenth Century. Difficulties in interpreting the rise of the imperial harem stem in large part from the fact that its power became manifest in the post-Suleymanic period. Traditionally, the reign of Suleyman has been regarded as the apogee of Ottoman fortunes and the period initiated by his death in 1566 one of precipitous decline from which the empire never fully recovered (despite the fact that it survived until the end of World War I). In this view, the personal incapacity of Suleyman's successors, in contrast to the vigor and ability of their ancestors, opened the door to the "meddling" of harem women, who did not hesitate to exploit their influence over "weak-minded" sultans to satisfy their "lust" for power and wealth. But the power of Ottoman royal women was too broadly and publicly expressed and too embedded in the structure of imperial institutions for it to be simplistically dismissed as illegitimate. Modern treatments of this period have not recognized the politically partisan nature of much of the contemporary critique of female power, such as the proclamation of Sunullah Efendi. Recently, new work on this period in Ottoman history has challenged the very notion of post-Suleymanic decline, bringing about a long-overdue reevaluation of developments in the late sixteenth and early seventeenth centuries. Even some of these recent works, however, continue to repeat the unexamined theme of the dynasty's dissipation."

(bold highlighting is mine)

As for your last question, every day new documentation could be discovered. Like, every single day. Sometimes papers are not stored correctly, sometimes they're dismissed as useless by archivists and therefore forgotten in the storage room, sometimes they're not translated or interpreted correctly. History is an evolving science; we'll never reach the day in which we'll tell ourselves: okay, we've studied all the sources, there's nothing left to do.

[athzhowakar]

[athzhowakar]

[athzhowakar]

Top 5 moments in ASOIAF that made you actually laugh

5. Jaime Lannister having no fucking clue what’s going on and being rendered genuinely speechless for the first time in his entire life because he can’t recall a fire and blood footnote which means he’s an idiot

4. The concept of a sixteen year old saying this and meaning it:

3. When everyone on Cersei’s small council puts their heads together and is successfully able to recall Jon Snow’s last name which is the same last name that every single northern bastard has:

2.

1. No one wants you for their king. Sorry.🙈

[athzhowakar]

She is playing the long game. As stated earlier, she is planning to stop Jacaerys' ascension as revenge. A war will definitely break out in future. She wants to play her cards right and manipulate the results in her favour.

Jacaerys is older.

With Lord Manderly's daughter dead, the betrothal with Joffrey is at an end. So, no Lord in the North has any specific alliance with the 'bastard' faction of Rhaenyra's children which she wants to use as an advantage.

She kind of plans to marry Aegon to her daughter. In that way, the entire North might have to back him. She also knows that there are many proud Lords who supported the Greens and are discontent with Rhaenyra's ascension. Most of them believe that Jacaerys was a bastard.

It is also possible that... having a child early was also a part of the plan. If she has a child early, she can also get a betrothal before Aegon gets betrothed to someone else. Also, she needs to be careful, not to incur the wrath of Rhaenyra. And this includes maintaining a somewhat good relation with Jacaerys at least on his face. She plans to be unpredictable.

Supplanting Rhaenyra or Jacaerys at this moment will be too complex. So, she goes for the easier tactic.

Hands As Cold As Ice (II)

⚜️ Pairing : Cregan Stark × Female!Reader

⚜️ Period : Post Dance AU where Jacaerys and Daemon are alive. Rhaenyra is the Queen.

⚜️ Synopsis : The widow of Prince Aemond and the daughter of Queen Rhaenyra is to marry Lord Cregan Stark as a means to secure a political alliance. The princess marries Cregan despite not wanting to do so.

⚜️ Trigger warnings : Intimate scenes ahead, mention of death, depression, incompatible relationships, pregnancy and the woes that come with it.

⚜️ Previous part : (Tap here)

Four months had passed since Y/N learnt that she was with child. As she stood in front of the mirror, early in the morning, she noticed that her belly had begun to swell. She caressed her belly while looking at its reflection in the mirror. Even though she was not very happy at first, she had grown quite loving towards the little being in her womb. Perhaps, she wanted a child after all.

There was a knock on the door after which it opened. Cregan entered to see Y/N dressed up and standing in front of the mirror.

They no longer shared a bed. But Cregan made it a habit to visit her regularly and sometimes even more than once during the day. He used to come and talk to her about her well being and that of the child of course. He even insisted on dining with her at least once in a day. Whenever he saw Y/N's sulken face during the meal, he used to say, "It is only for the child. I will not bother you anymore once the child is born."

Cregan approached her and touched her belly.

"How is the child faring?"

"Fairly well, My Lord."

"And you?"

"I am good."

"Have you eaten?"

"Not yet"

"Good, I will ask the maids to bring us some food."

Some time later, the maids brought beef stew, rice porridge, bread and mead. Cregan poured himself some mead and washed it down his throat. Then he started eating the rice porridge along with some bread.

Y/N stared at the food for some time and then at the man in front of her. "He is so stubborn. He will not let me dine alone in peace," she said to herself and sighed.

She did not even touch the rice porridge and bread. She picked up a bowl of beef stew and started eating.

"The porridge tastes good. Won't you even try it?"

"No"

"Why not?"

"I don't want to."

"What if the child wants some porridge?"

"The child doesn't."

"How do you know?"

"Just like that."

"Fine"

Y/N continued to chew the pieces of meat when she felt Cregan's gaze on her. And there he was, drinking mead while staring at her.

"You should not stare at someone like that, My Lord," she told Cregan.

Cregan put his cup down and looked at her. He said, "Would you rather have me looking at someone else?"

"I do not really care," Y/N said, nonchalantly.

"Why not?" Cregan asked.

Y/N stared at the bowl of stew to avoid looking at Cregan. "You are a man," she said. "You have your needs. If you don't find comfort with me, you should seek it elsewhere...Like you have been doing, for the past few months."

"If it offends you, I shall stop." Cregan asked, with a voice which sounded like guilt.

"There is no need for you to do that," Y/N replied. "I just... Nevermind!"

Y/N had lost her appetite. She placed the bowl on the table and was about to get up when Cregan placed it back into her hands. "Eat it," he said. "Starving yourself can be harmful to you and the child."

The rest of the meal was eaten without an exchange of words between them.

After finishing the food, Cregan stood up and said, "I will be leaving Winterfell to visit Lord Cerwyn in his castle. Take care of yourself."

When he had left, Y/N decided to sleep. She had been feeling very sleepy for the last few months. However, her dreams were not very peaceful. They were plagued by strange dreams she could not explain.

Y/N fell asleep as soon as she lied on the bed. She started dreaming again. She walked through the misty path in a forest she could not recognise. She kept walking. She looked down to see that she was walking barefoot and there were lesions on her feet. Her feet hurt. She heard her name being called and she walked towards the source of that voice like an insect which flies towards fire. The call was like a spell. She could not resist it. She walked with her wounded feet and soon reached a stony path. The stones cut her feet some more. Whenever she stopped, the voice called her again. She reached the edge of a cliff and looked around to see smoke emerging from cracks around her. It felt as if the cracks on that cliff stored lava. When she looked closer, that was actually the case. Suddenly, a hooded man appeared out of nowhere. Before she could even blink, the man had disappeared and reappeared right behind her. When she decided to turn around, he pushed her before she could see his face. She rolled down the cliff. She got up with a lot of scratches and cuts on her body. When she stood up, mist surrounded her again. In the mist, she could only see the shadow of a dragon. She found herself crawling towards it. But before she could go further, she found egg shells. Those were not the eggs of a bird, but the eggs of a dragon. They looked like they had been destroyed by someone. She heard the roar of the dragon. Her breath quickened and she started crawling away. The dragon kept roaring. Just as she reached near the cliff from which she had fallen, she heard the voice calling her name again. She looked up to see the same hooded man who had pushed her. She looked carefully so as to see his face. But, the man had no face. The hollow hooded man stared at her. Y/N kept staring at that man without a face, as if staring at the emptiness that was ready to swallow her.

She woke up with a jerk. She took heavy breaths as she caressed her belly.

Y/N washed her face before going out of her chamber. A maid came running towards her.

"Why are you here? What is the matter?"

"My Princess, Lord Stark has ordered that you are to be accompanied by a maid or two wherever you go."

"I do not need you."

"Lord Stark has strictly ordered us."

"I said that I can go alone. I do not need you following me like a tail."

"I might get whipped, Princess. Please take me along."

"Fine"

Y/N and the maid walked through the corridor.

Y/N said, "Let us go and take a walk in the courtyard."

"That will be good, Princess," the maid replied.

They were strolling in the courtyard when the maid said to her, "Lord Stark cares a lot about you, Princess. He asked the gardener to plant these blue chrysanthemums here because he had heard that you liked them. And do you know the best part? He did that even before you came to Winterfell."

Y/N only nodded. Her emotions were conflicted. Truth to be told, she pitied her husband. He did not deserve to marry someone whose heart had turned into stone long ago. Her eyes had no love and her hands were as cold as snow. There was nothing she could give him, save for this child perhaps. Maybe that was the reason he did not want to give up on his child. Moreover, he was the one who put this child in her belly. So the reaction was only natural.

"May I ask one thing, Princess?" the maid looked at Y/N with pleading eyes.

"Ask," Y/N replied.

The maid cleared her throat and said, "Do you really like dandelions? They are only weeds!"

"I do actually," Y/N said. "Although, I would not prefer them nearby if I were to grow vegetables."

The maid nodded.

Y/N asked her, "How do you know that I like dandelions?"

The maid replied, "Yesterday, Lord Stark asked my brother, who works as a gardener, to plant dandelions in the courtyard which can be seen through the window in your chamber. When asked, he said that you liked to stare at dandelions."

"That's very... thoughtful of His Lordship," Y/N remarked.

Y/N stopped to admire the chrysanthemums. She touched the blue petals and felt the morning dew on her fingers. Just then, she felt a sharp pain in the lower part of her abdomen. She closed her eyes and felt warm liquid flowing down her thighs and legs. She looked down and saw blood. She froze in shock and soon fell down unconscious. The maid screamed for help.

Cregan returned to Winterfell the next morning. He arrived to the castle to find everyone staring at him, as if hesitating to look into his eyes. He ignored them and started walking towards his wife's chamber to check on her. He found a huge crowd outside the chamber, staring into his soul. In another corner, she saw a maid crying while others were trying to console her. Dread filled him. He walked slowly towards the chamber and found the Maester standing at the door.

Before he could say anything, the Maester bowed his head and said, "My Lord, the Gods took your child too soon. Princess Y/N has lost the child. She is now, in a stable condition. You should go and see her."

Cregan opened the door to see Y/N curled up in the bed. He approached her and sat at the edge of the bed. Y/N was weeping silently. He picked up the blanket that Y/N had thrown on the floor and covered her with it. In another corner of the floor, he saw the blood stained sheets that had not been taken away yet. His heart sank and his eyes filled with tears. He wiped them away and sat near Y/N again. He kissed her head and caressed it.

Y/N only wept.

She started saying, "This is the second child that I have lost. I thought that the first one was my mother's doing. But she said that she did not do it. Now...this!"

"Second child," those words shot Cregan like an arrow. He did not know that Y/N had been with child before. Y/N had been not just a widow, but also a mother who had lost her child. And to think that she believed her own family was responsible for this, made her hatred for him much easier to understand.

Y/N was too much in grief to remember that she did not like Cregan. She did not mind his hand caressing her head and his lips kissing her head. She said, "Mayhaps, the Gods will never grant me a living child."

"No...no... don't say that... don't," Cregan said to her while rubbing her back. "You will have children...lots of children... children you will love... children you will sing to...and..."

Cregan's voice cracked. He could not control his tears anymore. He broke down crying in front of her.

Red Keep :

The Red Keep was busy with the preparations. The wedding of the Crown Prince Jacaerys to Lady Baela was only two moons away.

Jacaerys was standing on the terrace and admiring the view of the city when a guard interrupted him. "My Prince," he said. "The queen has asked for your presence in her chamber."

Jacaerys nodded and walked to his mother's chamber. Rhaenyra looked at him with sadness. Jacaerys held her hand to ask what was wrong. She said, "A raven came from Winterfell. Your sister has lost her child."

Jacaerys sighed. He did not know how to feel about it. His sister did not want that marriage and yet, got pregnant quite soon. Did she love the child that was growing in her belly? Or did she loathe him like she loathed her husband? He did not know. She loathed all of them now and the child was gone. Those thoughts were meaningless. 

Rhaenyra touched his son's cheek and said, "Jace, you should fly to Winterfell. Make peace with your sister and convince her to attend the wedding. The environment here will please her."

"I will, Mother," Jacaerys replied. "I will leave today."

Winterfell :

The guards saw Vermax flying towards the castle. One of them rushed to notify Cregan. Jacaerys landed Vermax outside the walls of the castle. As he walked towards the gates, he saw Cregan coming out to greet him.

"Welcome to Winterfell, My Prince."

"Thank you, My Lord."

"I apologise for the lack of grandeur. We did not know that you were coming and recently...we are going through hard times."

"I know everything, My Lord. We are brothers now. You need not think about arranging a feast about me while grieving."

"I am glad you understand, My Prince."

They walked in through the door. The castle was gloomy due to a lingering feeling of sadness.

"How is my sister?"

"Losing the child has weakened her. And she is grieving. She barely eats or drinks and does not leave her chamber."

"I wish to meet her."

"I ought to say that it is not the right time to do so."

"But why?"

"You know it yourself, don't you?"

"My Lord...I..."

"You should not have forced her into this. None of us is happy with this arrangement."

"The ones in our position do not get to follow our hearts, My Lord. We often have to do what we are told and what is expected of us."

"But would you disagree if I say that the wedding was too soon?"

"I think that the timing was good enough."

"Not for her....or me. If you had waited for a year or two, perhaps she would not have loathed my existence so much."

"Did she...tell you something?"

"She did not. But I wish she did."

"Her Grace specifically asked me to make peace with my sister. What about that?"

"I will inform her about your arrival and then you can go and meet her when she is ready to receive you."

"As you say, My Lord."

Cregan took Jacaerys to one the guest's chamber and ordered the servants to attend to his needs. He took his leave and went to Y/N's chamber.

Y/N was sitting by the fire and staring at it. She did not notice Cregan entering her chamber. Cregan walked towards her slowly and stood behind her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and said, "Prince Jacaerys has come to see you."

Y/N said with a bitterness that rolled out of her tongue quite easily, "Did he come here to see me or to invite LORD STARK to his wedding?"

"He says that he wants to see you," Cregan said. "You should sort out the rest yourself. Moreover, he has not yet spoken about his wedding."

"I don't want to see him," Y/N said, tearfully.

"He had his own reasons to do whatever he did. It never hurts to talk about things," Cregan replied. "I will tell him that you are ready to see him."

An hour later, Jacaerys found himself being walked to his sister's chamber by Cregan. On reaching the door, Cregan said, "She has been through a lot. It will be unwise to push her into anything else."

Jacaerys nodded. Cregan left him there and walked away. A maid informed Y/N about his arrival. Y/N said to her, "Let him in and ask the others to leave us alone."

Jacaerys entered the chamber slowly. Y/N was sitting on a chair near the fireplace. She had worn a simple red gown and her face was emotionless. She pointed towards the chair beside her. Jacaerys sat on the chair and smiled at her.

"Are you here to mock me?"

"Sister...no!"

"Then why are you here?"

"I have come to see you. Mother wanted us to make peace with each other. She feels that if you attend my wedding, the atmosphere will cheer you up."

"Cheer me up? What has happened to me? Did I lose a doll that she can cheer me up?"

"Mother knows what it is to lose a child, Y/N."

"I don't want to attend your wedding."

"Why?"

"Why should you get to marry the one you love when I don't even get to grieve for the one I loved?"

"We all go through different circumstances, Y/N."

"And why is it that I am always on the losing side and you are always on the gaining side?"

Jacaerys stood up and sat on the floor beside his sister. "Y/N," he said. "That is...just our fate, my dear." He took Y/N's hands in his and said, "I know that it is hard for you. I know that losing a child is hard. And to you it has happened not just once, but twice..."

Y/N's eyes widened. She looked at Jacaerys and questioned, "How do you know that I had lost a child earlier?"

Jacaerys could not find words.

Y/N stared into his soul and asked again, "It was you, wasn't it? You killed my child, didn't you? My and Aemond's child?"

Y/N pushed Jacaerys away and stood up from the chair.   "Earlier, I used to blame my mother. Then I started thinking that... maybe Mother was innocent. Mayhaps, it was the will of the Gods. BUT I WAS RIGHT!" Y/N said.

"No, not mother," Jacaerys said, defending Rhaenyra. "She had no part in this. She did not even know that you were pregnant."

"So isn't what they say about her absolutely right?" Y/N said, scornfully. "If she cannot control her son and husband, then how can she control the Seven Kingdoms?"

Jacaerys looked away. He never knew that a day like that would come. He had hoped for his sin to get drowned in the God's Eye along with Aemond. "It was... necessary," he said. "The war was about survival. What if you gave birth to a boy? The Lords that raised their banners for our uncle would then back him. Everything that we have worked for would become meaningless. Tell me Y/N, would you rather have us kill your child after it was born? Or imprison him forever? Or send him to the Wall?"

"What if I had given birth to a girl instead?" Y/N said.

"It is not about a boy or a girl, Sister," Jacaerys said. "We could not take the risk. Daemon said, 'Your sister will not be able to bear the loss of her breathing child. So get rid of the child when it is still in her belly, when it has not yet taken its first breath and before her condition becomes known.' I HAD NO CHOICE, Y/N. I had to defend my birthright."

"You have no birthright, Jace," Y/N said. "You are a bastard! And you deserve nothing!"

"And so are you, Y/N! So are you! You are no princess! You are no Velaryon! You are a bastard of Queen Rhaenyra! Nothing else. But here we are, treating you like a princess and giving you much more than what you deserve," Jace replied.

Jacaerys approached his weeping sister and cupped her face. He said, "Y/N, let us not hold on to the past. It will not do good to any of us. Come with me to King's Landing. Lord Stark will join you there at the time of my wedding. Let us be together as a family... like we always have been."

"Things have changed, Brother," Y/N said, pushing him away. "I have just realised that I gave up on my husband and let him die, and got my child killed...so that YOU can sit on the throne. So that YOU can be benefitted. And now you expect me to attend YOUR wedding to the woman you love. No Brother, you ask too much from me."

Jacaerys grabbed her arm and said, "Y/N, listen to me." He then released her arm and made her turn towards him. He spoke with a tone which sounded almost like a whisper, "Whatever you did, you did it for all of us. It was for our good."

"For your good, you mean," Y/N said. "Joining our mother's cause did no good to me. What did I get after all? I am now the daughter of the queen, who will become the sister of the king in future. It would have been the same if our uncle had been the king. I would have been the niece of the king, and the wife of the king's brother. As a matter of fact, it would have been better. I would have stayed in the court and my husband and child would have been alive."

"Are you regretting our mother's ascension, Y/N?" Jacaerys said. "Do you realise that you can lose your head for these treasonous words?"

Y/N slapped Jacaerys. "You dare accuse me of treason," she said. "After all I have done!"

"Should I call it greed then?" Jacaerys asked. "The same greed which consumed Alicent and Otto Hightower, and plunged the realm into a war?"

He grabbed her arms and said, "When did you become like this? Are you not supposed to support and fight for your family? Are you not indebted to the woman who bore you? Should you choose a man you barely spent a month with over me, your family, your own blood?"

"AEMOND WAS MY FAMILY TOO!" Y/N screamed. "AND SO WAS HIS CHILD WHO YOU KILLED IN MY WOMB."

"Y/N...." Jacaerys was about to say something when his sister cut him off.

"No, Jace. I will hear no more justifications from you. Go away, Jace. Any more words will only increase the bitterness," Y/N said to him, tearfully.

Jacaerys left the chamber silently. Later, that evening he  met with Cregan and extended the invitation to his wedding.

"What did your sister say?"

"She has refused to attend the wedding."

"Your sister is grieving the loss of her child. She needs some time before she can be herself again."

"What about you, My Lord?"

"I would love to attend your wedding, My Prince. However, you have already seen your sister's condition. I need to be with her."

"Are you sure about that, My Lord? Let us not pretend. It is just the two of us here."

"My Prince, I am your sister's husband and her not being fond of me does not change the fact. I have responsibilities towards her and those include being available for her, whenever she is in an emotional distress."

"But My Lord, Her Grace would want your presence in the wedding. After all, you are her only good-son and it would be unseemly if you are absent."

"I understand what you are trying to say, My Prince. But I beg you to consider the situation I am in."

"I have considered it and I hope that my sister finds it in her to love you in the way you love her."

"Your sister is doing her best, My Prince. More than anyone would do in her place."

Cregan urged Jacaerys to stay for at least another night but he refused. "Your dear wife does not want me here," he said to Cregan.

Surprisingly, when Jacaerys was about to leave, Y/N came out to see him. Cregan, who was standing nearby, was surprised.

"Sister?"

"It would be unseemly if I didn't come to bid my brother farewell."

"Did you come only because people would talk about it if it went the other way?"

"Yes"

"Sister... please forgive me."

"May the Gods forgive you."

"What about you?"

"I...I...don't know."

They exchanged no words further. Jacaerys mounted his dragon and flew away. Before Cregan could even look at her, Y/N started walking back into the castle.

A few months had passed since then.

Y/N kept to herself most of the time. Cregan resumed his Lordly duties while occasionally visiting Y/N for a small conversation. He was unsure about how she felt about him after all this time. So he kept those visits brief.

It was a cold morning. Cregan had returned to Winterfell after being away for a month as he had gone to inspect Moat Cailin. The Maester received him at the gates.

"Lord Cerwyn was here, My Lord."

"When?"

"Yesterday, My Lord. The princess received him and hosted him."

"Then I shall talk to her about it."

"That will be good, My Lord."

Y/N was sitting by the window and staring at dandelions when she heard a knock on the door. She knew that knock. It was Cregan. Cregan entered the chamber with a small smile on his lips. He took off his fur cloak and sat down beside her.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing much, just staring outside."

"How have you been?"

"Fine. And you?"

"Good and well, as you can see."

"Maester told me about Lord Cerwyn."

"Oh yes, he did come. He is getting married. He wanted to invite you to his wedding personally. But he did not know that you had gone to inspect Moat Cailin."

"Is that all he said?"

"He offered his condolences for my miscarriage, if that's what you are asking."

"I see."

"Have you eaten?"

"I did it on the way."

Silence followed those words. They sat together for a while without exchanging any words or whispering. Finally, Cregan stood up. He caressed her cheek and kissed it before saying, "Take care of yourself." He then left the chamber.

Lord Cerwyn's wedding to Lord Karstark's daughter, place three moons later. It was quite a grand affair, attended by all the Northern Lords. Y/N was quite hesitant to attend it, but Cregan insisted that a feast would make her happy and that, all the Lords of the North will expect to see the Lady Stark. She agreed and attended it along with him.

Just like Cregan had said, all the Lords and Ladies wanted to meet Y/N and talk to her. Among them, Y/N took a special liking to Lord Bolton's sister and spent the rest of the wedding with her, drinking more than eating.

By the end of the feast, Y/N was so drunk that she could not feel her legs.

After the feast, everyone retired to the chambers that Lord Cerwyn had prepared for them.

Cregan opened the window to let the cool breeze into the chamber. He took a deep breath and gazed at the river flowing at a distance. Just then, the door creaked and Y/N entered the chamber, stumbling. "Thank you, My Ladies," she said to the Ladies who had helped her to reach there.

Y/N leaned on the closed door to support herself. Cregan watched her in silence. Stumbling, she walked towards him. He caught her just in time before she fell down. Y/N smelled like wine and there was a smile on her lips. She held him close and looked into his eyes. She then started playing with his hair.

"Princess? What are you doing here?"

"I need... something."

"What?"

"Eh....let us....make....a.... child."

"Princess?"

"Let...us...do it... please."

"No, Princess. You are...drunk."

"I don't care."

"You are not yourself."

"I want a babe."

Cregan carried her in his arms and made her lie on the bed. Y/N was too drunk and fell asleep soon after. The next day, she woke up early in the morning, to see Cregan combing his hair. She sighed.

"You are awake, Princess."

"Hmm"

"Is your head still spinning?"

"Not spinning exactly. But I do have a terrible headache and my whole body is aching."

"That happens after you drink too much."

"I know."

"You probably don't even remember what you did last night."

"I do, actually."

This was followed by an eerie silence. "You do?" Cregan asked, confused.

"Is it wrong for me to want a child?" Y/N asked in return.

Cregan replied, "No, certainly not. I was just...not expecting you to behave that way."

"What way?" Y/N asked in return. "Was it too indecent for you?"

Cregan said, "It is not about decency. It is about your state of mind. I would advise you to not rush things."

"You tell me. You have been... taking care of me for the last few months. Do you not want me to be happy?" Y/N asked.

Cregan said, "I certainly do."

Y/N pleaded, "Then give me a child and make me happy."

Cregan was still doubtful. He thought that Y/N was saying that at the heat of the moment and would perhaps regret it later. So he responded by placing his hands on her shoulders and saying, "We will talk about that again after reaching Winterfell."

But she pulled him close to her and kissed his lips. She then cupped his face and said, "Look, I know that this matter is quite messed up. You might think that I am an insane woman who does not know what she wants. And I know that this feels awkward and too sudden after all this time. But I do know what exactly I want, at least at this moment. But do not ask me why. Because I do not know that either."

Cregan said, "Let us see if you say the same thing after the effect of the wine wears off. Then we will decide."

It had been a week since Cregan and Y/N reached Winterfell. They had no further conversation on that matter. But Y/N was growing restless. She felt that Cregan was running away from her. So one night, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

She took a bath and put on a grey gown. She walked through the corridor and saw one of Cregan's personal guards. She stopped him and said, "Where is Lord Stark?"

"Lord Stark has just returned to his chamber, My Princess," he replied.

Y/N went to his chamber and opened the door. There was no knock or anything of that sort. She entered the chamber and closed the door behind her while Cregan, who was washing his face, stopped his movements to stare at her. She then took off her gown, revealing a thin white underdress. She walked towards Cregan, who had worn a white tunic and black breeches.

"Princess?"

"Yes"

"Why... are... you...here?"

"I can be in your chamber whenever I want. I don't need your permission, do I?"

"Ye..No! No! Absolutely not. You can come as you please."

"Yeah... I know."

"Do you know why I am here?"

"No...but I think..."

"Since you have been running away from me, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Now, no more running."

Y/N pushed him against a wall and started to pull the strings holding his breeches. Cregan's breath quickened. With one hand, he held his breeches and with the other, he held her hand to stop it.

"What are you doing, Princess?"

"What does it look like I am doing, My Lord?"

"Breeches should come off at last... I think."

"Well...if you say so."

Y/N then cupped his face and kissed his lips. She kissed him like she wanted to eat it. Cregan put his tongue in her mouth and she put her tongue in his. She bit his tongue and when he retracted his tongue as a reflex, she bit his lower lip hard, till it started bleeding. She then sucked some of that blood before letting Cregan move his face away.

"You are craving blood, aren't you?"

"I am."

"I did not know that you have a beast in you."

"Well, now you do."

She worked on the buttons of his tunic while he worked on the buttons of her underdress. When both came off, Y/N was in the clothing she was born with while Cregan had only his breeches on. Y/N grabbed his arm and pushed him to the bed. She sat beside where he was lying and pulled the strings. She then stood up and pulled the breeches.

Cregan bit his lips as his manhood grew large and erect.  "Would you... like to take the initiative, Princess?" he said to Y/N.

"No," Y/N replied. She lied on the bed next to him and whispered in his ears, "Get on top of me, My Lord." She then kissed his ears and his cheek.

Cregan did not take much time to get up from the bed and climb on top of her. Soon after, he felt her legs parting. He pinned her hands down and kissed her lips.

He claimed her four times that night.

They were in each other's arms, panting from the lovemaking.

"Princess, what has gotten into you lately?"

"I don't know, My Lord."

"Cregan...call me Cregan...at least when we are in bed."

"Fine...Cregan. But 'My Lord' is better. Rolls off the tongue easily."

"Is it so?"

"Yes"

"I am glad to have you like this... happy, enthusiastic and... not sad."

"You are a good man, Cregan."

"Am I?"

"Yes"

"I have something to say, if you do not mind," Cregan said, hesitantly.

"What is it?" Y/N asked.

"It is about your brother...Prince Jacaerys," Cregan replied.

"I know what you want to say," Y/N stated. "But let me tell you, Jacaerys has done many wrong things and I can never forgive him for that. And let me tell you, the war is not over."

"I do not understand."

"You do...you do understand so well...but you pretend not to."

"I might understand better if you don't talk in riddles."

"After my mother dies, who do you think will be a stronger claimant for the Iron Throne? The Prince of Dragonstone, the eldest son of the Queen, a bastard? Or Aegon, the eldest trueborn son of the Queen? The Lords might accept a woman as their king. But will they accept a bastard as their king when there are other trueborn claimants? And whom do you think will Daemon support?"

"Daemon's daughter will be married to Jacaerys."

"Baela poses no threat to Aegon's rule. On the other hand, Aegon poses the greatest threat to Jacaerys' rule. Daemon will certainly know to choose his own blood."

"And which brother will you choose?"

"You will choose your dear friend Jace and so will the entire North after you. Additionally, Lord Manderly's youngest daughter will be married to Joffrey. That will also play a part. But if you ask me... I will choose Aegon. I shall not let anyone deprive my brother of his birthright."

At that moment, the dreams that she had in the past few days, flashed before her eyes. They were horrible nightmares. She could see her blood soaked gown from the time when she had lost Aemond's child. She could see Jaehaerys lying on the floor, in a pool of his blood, with his head gone. And she could see the bloated corpse of Aemond deep in the water of the God's Eye.

A year later :

"Our little girl is so lovely, isn't she?" Cregan said, touching the cheeks of the little baby in Y/N's arms.

"Of course she is. After all, she is my daughter," Y/N said, giggling.

"But I do believe that she has my grey eyes," Cregan replied, playfully narrowing his eyes.

"She does," Y/N said, smiling.

Just then, the Maester arrived.

"My Lord! My Princess!"

"What is the matter, Maester? Why are you so worried? Is it something related to Y/N or the babe?"

"No, My Lord. But the news is terrible."

"What is it?"

"Lord Manderly's youngest daughter, the one betrothed to Prince Joffrey, broke her neck while learning to ride a horse and died this morning."

"I shall write to Lord Manderly and offer my condolences."

Just as Cregan stood up and left, Y/N looked at the baby in her arms and kissed her forehead. "You will be the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, my dear daughter," she whispered to the child who was barely a month old.

..

..

..

To be continued

Tags : @anime-lover-forever-1127 @24k-raptor @sandrellymendonca

Special mention : @reylatargaryen (There is something special for you)

[athzhowakar]

Hands As Cold As Ice (II)

⚜️ Pairing : Cregan Stark × Female!Reader

⚜️ Period : Post Dance AU where Jacaerys and Daemon are alive. Rhaenyra is the Queen.

⚜️ Synopsis : The widow of Prince Aemond and the daughter of Queen Rhaenyra is to marry Lord Cregan Stark as a means to secure a political alliance. The princess marries Cregan despite not wanting to do so.

⚜️ Trigger warnings : Intimate scenes ahead, mention of death, depression, incompatible relationships, pregnancy and the woes that come with it.

⚜️ Previous part : (Tap here)

Four months had passed since Y/N learnt that she was with child. As she stood in front of the mirror, early in the morning, she noticed that her belly had begun to swell. She caressed her belly while looking at its reflection in the mirror. Even though she was not very happy at first, she had grown quite loving towards the little being in her womb. Perhaps, she wanted a child after all.

There was a knock on the door after which it opened. Cregan entered to see Y/N dressed up and standing in front of the mirror.

They no longer shared a bed. But Cregan made it a habit to visit her regularly and sometimes even more than once during the day. He used to come and talk to her about her well being and that of the child of course. He even insisted on dining with her at least once in a day. Whenever he saw Y/N's sulken face during the meal, he used to say, "It is only for the child. I will not bother you anymore once the child is born."

Cregan approached her and touched her belly.

"How is the child faring?"

"Fairly well, My Lord."

"And you?"

"I am good."

"Have you eaten?"

"Not yet"

"Good, I will ask the maids to bring us some food."

Some time later, the maids brought beef stew, rice porridge, bread and mead. Cregan poured himself some mead and washed it down his throat. Then he started eating the rice porridge along with some bread.

Y/N stared at the food for some time and then at the man in front of her. "He is so stubborn. He will not let me dine alone in peace," she said to herself and sighed.

She did not even touch the rice porridge and bread. She picked up a bowl of beef stew and started eating.

"The porridge tastes good. Won't you even try it?"

"No"

"Why not?"

"I don't want to."

"What if the child wants some porridge?"

"The child doesn't."

"How do you know?"

"Just like that."

"Fine"

Y/N continued to chew the pieces of meat when she felt Cregan's gaze on her. And there he was, drinking mead while staring at her.

"You should not stare at someone like that, My Lord," she told Cregan.

Cregan put his cup down and looked at her. He said, "Would you rather have me looking at someone else?"

"I do not really care," Y/N said, nonchalantly.

"Why not?" Cregan asked.

Y/N stared at the bowl of stew to avoid looking at Cregan. "You are a man," she said. "You have your needs. If you don't find comfort with me, you should seek it elsewhere...Like you have been doing, for the past few months."

"If it offends you, I shall stop." Cregan asked, with a voice which sounded like guilt.

"There is no need for you to do that," Y/N replied. "I just... Nevermind!"

Y/N had lost her appetite. She placed the bowl on the table and was about to get up when Cregan placed it back into her hands. "Eat it," he said. "Starving yourself can be harmful to you and the child."

The rest of the meal was eaten without an exchange of words between them.

After finishing the food, Cregan stood up and said, "I will be leaving Winterfell to visit Lord Cerwyn in his castle. Take care of yourself."

When he had left, Y/N decided to sleep. She had been feeling very sleepy for the last few months. However, her dreams were not very peaceful. They were plagued by strange dreams she could not explain.

Y/N fell asleep as soon as she lied on the bed. She started dreaming again. She walked through the misty path in a forest she could not recognise. She kept walking. She looked down to see that she was walking barefoot and there were lesions on her feet. Her feet hurt. She heard her name being called and she walked towards the source of that voice like an insect which flies towards fire. The call was like a spell. She could not resist it. She walked with her wounded feet and soon reached a stony path. The stones cut her feet some more. Whenever she stopped, the voice called her again. She reached the edge of a cliff and looked around to see smoke emerging from cracks around her. It felt as if the cracks on that cliff stored lava. When she looked closer, that was actually the case. Suddenly, a hooded man appeared out of nowhere. Before she could even blink, the man had disappeared and reappeared right behind her. When she decided to turn around, he pushed her before she could see his face. She rolled down the cliff. She got up with a lot of scratches and cuts on her body. When she stood up, mist surrounded her again. In the mist, she could only see the shadow of a dragon. She found herself crawling towards it. But before she could go further, she found egg shells. Those were not the eggs of a bird, but the eggs of a dragon. They looked like they had been destroyed by someone. She heard the roar of the dragon. Her breath quickened and she started crawling away. The dragon kept roaring. Just as she reached near the cliff from which she had fallen, she heard the voice calling her name again. She looked up to see the same hooded man who had pushed her. She looked carefully so as to see his face. But, the man had no face. The hollow hooded man stared at her. Y/N kept staring at that man without a face, as if staring at the emptiness that was ready to swallow her.

She woke up with a jerk. She took heavy breaths as she caressed her belly.

Y/N washed her face before going out of her chamber. A maid came running towards her.

"Why are you here? What is the matter?"

"My Princess, Lord Stark has ordered that you are to be accompanied by a maid or two wherever you go."

"I do not need you."

"Lord Stark has strictly ordered us."

"I said that I can go alone. I do not need you following me like a tail."

"I might get whipped, Princess. Please take me along."

"Fine"

Y/N and the maid walked through the corridor.

Y/N said, "Let us go and take a walk in the courtyard."

"That will be good, Princess," the maid replied.

They were strolling in the courtyard when the maid said to her, "Lord Stark cares a lot about you, Princess. He asked the gardener to plant these blue chrysanthemums here because he had heard that you liked them. And do you know the best part? He did that even before you came to Winterfell."

Y/N only nodded. Her emotions were conflicted. Truth to be told, she pitied her husband. He did not deserve to marry someone whose heart had turned into stone long ago. Her eyes had no love and her hands were as cold as snow. There was nothing she could give him, save for this child perhaps. Maybe that was the reason he did not want to give up on his child. Moreover, he was the one who put this child in her belly. So the reaction was only natural.

"May I ask one thing, Princess?" the maid looked at Y/N with pleading eyes.

"Ask," Y/N replied.

The maid cleared her throat and said, "Do you really like dandelions? They are only weeds!"

"I do actually," Y/N said. "Although, I would not prefer them nearby if I were to grow vegetables."

The maid nodded.

Y/N asked her, "How do you know that I like dandelions?"

The maid replied, "Yesterday, Lord Stark asked my brother, who works as a gardener, to plant dandelions in the courtyard which can be seen through the window in your chamber. When asked, he said that you liked to stare at dandelions."

"That's very... thoughtful of His Lordship," Y/N remarked.

Y/N stopped to admire the chrysanthemums. She touched the blue petals and felt the morning dew on her fingers. Just then, she felt a sharp pain in the lower part of her abdomen. She closed her eyes and felt warm liquid flowing down her thighs and legs. She looked down and saw blood. She froze in shock and soon fell down unconscious. The maid screamed for help.

Cregan returned to Winterfell the next morning. He arrived to the castle to find everyone staring at him, as if hesitating to look into his eyes. He ignored them and started walking towards his wife's chamber to check on her. He found a huge crowd outside the chamber, staring into his soul. In another corner, she saw a maid crying while others were trying to console her. Dread filled him. He walked slowly towards the chamber and found the Maester standing at the door.

Before he could say anything, the Maester bowed his head and said, "My Lord, the Gods took your child too soon. Princess Y/N has lost the child. She is now, in a stable condition. You should go and see her."

Cregan opened the door to see Y/N curled up in the bed. He approached her and sat at the edge of the bed. Y/N was weeping silently. He picked up the blanket that Y/N had thrown on the floor and covered her with it. In another corner of the floor, he saw the blood stained sheets that had not been taken away yet. His heart sank and his eyes filled with tears. He wiped them away and sat near Y/N again. He kissed her head and caressed it.

Y/N only wept.

She started saying, "This is the second child that I have lost. I thought that the first one was my mother's doing. But she said that she did not do it. Now...this!"

"Second child," those words shot Cregan like an arrow. He did not know that Y/N had been with child before. Y/N had been not just a widow, but also a mother who had lost her child. And to think that she believed her own family was responsible for this, made her hatred for him much easier to understand.

Y/N was too much in grief to remember that she did not like Cregan. She did not mind his hand caressing her head and his lips kissing her head. She said, "Mayhaps, the Gods will never grant me a living child."

"No...no... don't say that... don't," Cregan said to her while rubbing her back. "You will have children...lots of children... children you will love... children you will sing to...and..."

Cregan's voice cracked. He could not control his tears anymore. He broke down crying in front of her.

Red Keep :

The Red Keep was busy with the preparations. The wedding of the Crown Prince Jacaerys to Lady Baela was only two moons away.

Jacaerys was standing on the terrace and admiring the view of the city when a guard interrupted him. "My Prince," he said. "The queen has asked for your presence in her chamber."

Jacaerys nodded and walked to his mother's chamber. Rhaenyra looked at him with sadness. Jacaerys held her hand to ask what was wrong. She said, "A raven came from Winterfell. Your sister has lost her child."

Jacaerys sighed. He did not know how to feel about it. His sister did not want that marriage and yet, got pregnant quite soon. Did she love the child that was growing in her belly? Or did she loathe him like she loathed her husband? He did not know. She loathed all of them now and the child was gone. Those thoughts were meaningless. 

Rhaenyra touched his son's cheek and said, "Jace, you should fly to Winterfell. Make peace with your sister and convince her to attend the wedding. The environment here will please her."

"I will, Mother," Jacaerys replied. "I will leave today."

Winterfell :

The guards saw Vermax flying towards the castle. One of them rushed to notify Cregan. Jacaerys landed Vermax outside the walls of the castle. As he walked towards the gates, he saw Cregan coming out to greet him.

"Welcome to Winterfell, My Prince."

"Thank you, My Lord."

"I apologise for the lack of grandeur. We did not know that you were coming and recently...we are going through hard times."

"I know everything, My Lord. We are brothers now. You need not think about arranging a feast about me while grieving."

"I am glad you understand, My Prince."

They walked in through the door. The castle was gloomy due to a lingering feeling of sadness.

"How is my sister?"

"Losing the child has weakened her. And she is grieving. She barely eats or drinks and does not leave her chamber."

"I wish to meet her."

"I ought to say that it is not the right time to do so."

"But why?"

"You know it yourself, don't you?"

"My Lord...I..."

"You should not have forced her into this. None of us is happy with this arrangement."

"The ones in our position do not get to follow our hearts, My Lord. We often have to do what we are told and what is expected of us."

"But would you disagree if I say that the wedding was too soon?"

"I think that the timing was good enough."

"Not for her....or me. If you had waited for a year or two, perhaps she would not have loathed my existence so much."

"Did she...tell you something?"

"She did not. But I wish she did."

"Her Grace specifically asked me to make peace with my sister. What about that?"

"I will inform her about your arrival and then you can go and meet her when she is ready to receive you."

"As you say, My Lord."

Cregan took Jacaerys to one the guest's chamber and ordered the servants to attend to his needs. He took his leave and went to Y/N's chamber.

Y/N was sitting by the fire and staring at it. She did not notice Cregan entering her chamber. Cregan walked towards her slowly and stood behind her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and said, "Prince Jacaerys has come to see you."

Y/N said with a bitterness that rolled out of her tongue quite easily, "Did he come here to see me or to invite LORD STARK to his wedding?"

"He says that he wants to see you," Cregan said. "You should sort out the rest yourself. Moreover, he has not yet spoken about his wedding."

"I don't want to see him," Y/N said, tearfully.

"He had his own reasons to do whatever he did. It never hurts to talk about things," Cregan replied. "I will tell him that you are ready to see him."

An hour later, Jacaerys found himself being walked to his sister's chamber by Cregan. On reaching the door, Cregan said, "She has been through a lot. It will be unwise to push her into anything else."

Jacaerys nodded. Cregan left him there and walked away. A maid informed Y/N about his arrival. Y/N said to her, "Let him in and ask the others to leave us alone."

Jacaerys entered the chamber slowly. Y/N was sitting on a chair near the fireplace. She had worn a simple red gown and her face was emotionless. She pointed towards the chair beside her. Jacaerys sat on the chair and smiled at her.

"Are you here to mock me?"

"Sister...no!"

"Then why are you here?"

"I have come to see you. Mother wanted us to make peace with each other. She feels that if you attend my wedding, the atmosphere will cheer you up."

"Cheer me up? What has happened to me? Did I lose a doll that she can cheer me up?"

"Mother knows what it is to lose a child, Y/N."

"I don't want to attend your wedding."

"Why?"

"Why should you get to marry the one you love when I don't even get to grieve for the one I loved?"

"We all go through different circumstances, Y/N."

"And why is it that I am always on the losing side and you are always on the gaining side?"

Jacaerys stood up and sat on the floor beside his sister. "Y/N," he said. "That is...just our fate, my dear." He took Y/N's hands in his and said, "I know that it is hard for you. I know that losing a child is hard. And to you it has happened not just once, but twice..."

Y/N's eyes widened. She looked at Jacaerys and questioned, "How do you know that I had lost a child earlier?"

Jacaerys could not find words.

Y/N stared into his soul and asked again, "It was you, wasn't it? You killed my child, didn't you? My and Aemond's child?"

Y/N pushed Jacaerys away and stood up from the chair.   "Earlier, I used to blame my mother. Then I started thinking that... maybe Mother was innocent. Mayhaps, it was the will of the Gods. BUT I WAS RIGHT!" Y/N said.

"No, not mother," Jacaerys said, defending Rhaenyra. "She had no part in this. She did not even know that you were pregnant."

"So isn't what they say about her absolutely right?" Y/N said, scornfully. "If she cannot control her son and husband, then how can she control the Seven Kingdoms?"

Jacaerys looked away. He never knew that a day like that would come. He had hoped for his sin to get drowned in the God's Eye along with Aemond. "It was... necessary," he said. "The war was about survival. What if you gave birth to a boy? The Lords that raised their banners for our uncle would then back him. Everything that we have worked for would become meaningless. Tell me Y/N, would you rather have us kill your child after it was born? Or imprison him forever? Or send him to the Wall?"

"What if I had given birth to a girl instead?" Y/N said.

"It is not about a boy or a girl, Sister," Jacaerys said. "We could not take the risk. Daemon said, 'Your sister will not be able to bear the loss of her breathing child. So get rid of the child when it is still in her belly, when it has not yet taken its first breath and before her condition becomes known.' I HAD NO CHOICE, Y/N. I had to defend my birthright."

"You have no birthright, Jace," Y/N said. "You are a bastard! And you deserve nothing!"

"And so are you, Y/N! So are you! You are no princess! You are no Velaryon! You are a bastard of Queen Rhaenyra! Nothing else. But here we are, treating you like a princess and giving you much more than what you deserve," Jace replied.

Jacaerys approached his weeping sister and cupped her face. He said, "Y/N, let us not hold on to the past. It will not do good to any of us. Come with me to King's Landing. Lord Stark will join you there at the time of my wedding. Let us be together as a family... like we always have been."

"Things have changed, Brother," Y/N said, pushing him away. "I have just realised that I gave up on my husband and let him die, and got my child killed...so that YOU can sit on the throne. So that YOU can be benefitted. And now you expect me to attend YOUR wedding to the woman you love. No Brother, you ask too much from me."

Jacaerys grabbed her arm and said, "Y/N, listen to me." He then released her arm and made her turn towards him. He spoke with a tone which sounded almost like a whisper, "Whatever you did, you did it for all of us. It was for our good."

"For your good, you mean," Y/N said. "Joining our mother's cause did no good to me. What did I get after all? I am now the daughter of the queen, who will become the sister of the king in future. It would have been the same if our uncle had been the king. I would have been the niece of the king, and the wife of the king's brother. As a matter of fact, it would have been better. I would have stayed in the court and my husband and child would have been alive."

"Are you regretting our mother's ascension, Y/N?" Jacaerys said. "Do you realise that you can lose your head for these treasonous words?"

Y/N slapped Jacaerys. "You dare accuse me of treason," she said. "After all I have done!"

"Should I call it greed then?" Jacaerys asked. "The same greed which consumed Alicent and Otto Hightower, and plunged the realm into a war?"

He grabbed her arms and said, "When did you become like this? Are you not supposed to support and fight for your family? Are you not indebted to the woman who bore you? Should you choose a man you barely spent a month with over me, your family, your own blood?"

"AEMOND WAS MY FAMILY TOO!" Y/N screamed. "AND SO WAS HIS CHILD WHO YOU KILLED IN MY WOMB."

"Y/N...." Jacaerys was about to say something when his sister cut him off.

"No, Jace. I will hear no more justifications from you. Go away, Jace. Any more words will only increase the bitterness," Y/N said to him, tearfully.

Jacaerys left the chamber silently. Later, that evening he  met with Cregan and extended the invitation to his wedding.

"What did your sister say?"

"She has refused to attend the wedding."

"Your sister is grieving the loss of her child. She needs some time before she can be herself again."

"What about you, My Lord?"

"I would love to attend your wedding, My Prince. However, you have already seen your sister's condition. I need to be with her."

"Are you sure about that, My Lord? Let us not pretend. It is just the two of us here."

"My Prince, I am your sister's husband and her not being fond of me does not change the fact. I have responsibilities towards her and those include being available for her, whenever she is in an emotional distress."

"But My Lord, Her Grace would want your presence in the wedding. After all, you are her only good-son and it would be unseemly if you are absent."

"I understand what you are trying to say, My Prince. But I beg you to consider the situation I am in."

"I have considered it and I hope that my sister finds it in her to love you in the way you love her."

"Your sister is doing her best, My Prince. More than anyone would do in her place."

Cregan urged Jacaerys to stay for at least another night but he refused. "Your dear wife does not want me here," he said to Cregan.

Surprisingly, when Jacaerys was about to leave, Y/N came out to see him. Cregan, who was standing nearby, was surprised.

"Sister?"

"It would be unseemly if I didn't come to bid my brother farewell."

"Did you come only because people would talk about it if it went the other way?"

"Yes"

"Sister... please forgive me."

"May the Gods forgive you."

"What about you?"

"I...I...don't know."

They exchanged no words further. Jacaerys mounted his dragon and flew away. Before Cregan could even look at her, Y/N started walking back into the castle.

A few months had passed since then.

Y/N kept to herself most of the time. Cregan resumed his Lordly duties while occasionally visiting Y/N for a small conversation. He was unsure about how she felt about him after all this time. So he kept those visits brief.

It was a cold morning. Cregan had returned to Winterfell after being away for a month as he had gone to inspect Moat Cailin. The Maester received him at the gates.

"Lord Cerwyn was here, My Lord."

"When?"

"Yesterday, My Lord. The princess received him and hosted him."

"Then I shall talk to her about it."

"That will be good, My Lord."

Y/N was sitting by the window and staring at dandelions when she heard a knock on the door. She knew that knock. It was Cregan. Cregan entered the chamber with a small smile on his lips. He took off his fur cloak and sat down beside her.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing much, just staring outside."

"How have you been?"

"Fine. And you?"

"Good and well, as you can see."

"Maester told me about Lord Cerwyn."

"Oh yes, he did come. He is getting married. He wanted to invite you to his wedding personally. But he did not know that you had gone to inspect Moat Cailin."

"Is that all he said?"

"He offered his condolences for my miscarriage, if that's what you are asking."

"I see."

"Have you eaten?"

"I did it on the way."

Silence followed those words. They sat together for a while without exchanging any words or whispering. Finally, Cregan stood up. He caressed her cheek and kissed it before saying, "Take care of yourself." He then left the chamber.

Lord Cerwyn's wedding to Lord Karstark's daughter, place three moons later. It was quite a grand affair, attended by all the Northern Lords. Y/N was quite hesitant to attend it, but Cregan insisted that a feast would make her happy and that, all the Lords of the North will expect to see the Lady Stark. She agreed and attended it along with him.

Just like Cregan had said, all the Lords and Ladies wanted to meet Y/N and talk to her. Among them, Y/N took a special liking to Lord Bolton's sister and spent the rest of the wedding with her, drinking more than eating.

By the end of the feast, Y/N was so drunk that she could not feel her legs.

After the feast, everyone retired to the chambers that Lord Cerwyn had prepared for them.

Cregan opened the window to let the cool breeze into the chamber. He took a deep breath and gazed at the river flowing at a distance. Just then, the door creaked and Y/N entered the chamber, stumbling. "Thank you, My Ladies," she said to the Ladies who had helped her to reach there.

Y/N leaned on the closed door to support herself. Cregan watched her in silence. Stumbling, she walked towards him. He caught her just in time before she fell down. Y/N smelled like wine and there was a smile on her lips. She held him close and looked into his eyes. She then started playing with his hair.

"Princess? What are you doing here?"

"I need... something."

"What?"

"Eh....let us....make....a.... child."

"Princess?"

"Let...us...do it... please."

"No, Princess. You are...drunk."

"I don't care."

"You are not yourself."

"I want a babe."

Cregan carried her in his arms and made her lie on the bed. Y/N was too drunk and fell asleep soon after. The next day, she woke up early in the morning, to see Cregan combing his hair. She sighed.

"You are awake, Princess."

"Hmm"

"Is your head still spinning?"

"Not spinning exactly. But I do have a terrible headache and my whole body is aching."

"That happens after you drink too much."

"I know."

"You probably don't even remember what you did last night."

"I do, actually."

This was followed by an eerie silence. "You do?" Cregan asked, confused.

"Is it wrong for me to want a child?" Y/N asked in return.

Cregan replied, "No, certainly not. I was just...not expecting you to behave that way."

"What way?" Y/N asked in return. "Was it too indecent for you?"

Cregan said, "It is not about decency. It is about your state of mind. I would advise you to not rush things."

"You tell me. You have been... taking care of me for the last few months. Do you not want me to be happy?" Y/N asked.

Cregan said, "I certainly do."

Y/N pleaded, "Then give me a child and make me happy."

Cregan was still doubtful. He thought that Y/N was saying that at the heat of the moment and would perhaps regret it later. So he responded by placing his hands on her shoulders and saying, "We will talk about that again after reaching Winterfell."

But she pulled him close to her and kissed his lips. She then cupped his face and said, "Look, I know that this matter is quite messed up. You might think that I am an insane woman who does not know what she wants. And I know that this feels awkward and too sudden after all this time. But I do know what exactly I want, at least at this moment. But do not ask me why. Because I do not know that either."

Cregan said, "Let us see if you say the same thing after the effect of the wine wears off. Then we will decide."

It had been a week since Cregan and Y/N reached Winterfell. They had no further conversation on that matter. But Y/N was growing restless. She felt that Cregan was running away from her. So one night, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

She took a bath and put on a grey gown. She walked through the corridor and saw one of Cregan's personal guards. She stopped him and said, "Where is Lord Stark?"

"Lord Stark has just returned to his chamber, My Princess," he replied.

Y/N went to his chamber and opened the door. There was no knock or anything of that sort. She entered the chamber and closed the door behind her while Cregan, who was washing his face, stopped his movements to stare at her. She then took off her gown, revealing a thin white underdress. She walked towards Cregan, who had worn a white tunic and black breeches.

"Princess?"

"Yes"

"Why... are... you...here?"

"I can be in your chamber whenever I want. I don't need your permission, do I?"

"Ye..No! No! Absolutely not. You can come as you please."

"Yeah... I know."

"Do you know why I am here?"

"No...but I think..."

"Since you have been running away from me, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Now, no more running."

Y/N pushed him against a wall and started to pull the strings holding his breeches. Cregan's breath quickened. With one hand, he held his breeches and with the other, he held her hand to stop it.

"What are you doing, Princess?"

"What does it look like I am doing, My Lord?"

"Breeches should come off at last... I think."

"Well...if you say so."

Y/N then cupped his face and kissed his lips. She kissed him like she wanted to eat it. Cregan put his tongue in her mouth and she put her tongue in his. She bit his tongue and when he retracted his tongue as a reflex, she bit his lower lip hard, till it started bleeding. She then sucked some of that blood before letting Cregan move his face away.

"You are craving blood, aren't you?"

"I am."

"I did not know that you have a beast in you."

"Well, now you do."

She worked on the buttons of his tunic while he worked on the buttons of her underdress. When both came off, Y/N was in the clothing she was born with while Cregan had only his breeches on. Y/N grabbed his arm and pushed him to the bed. She sat beside where he was lying and pulled the strings. She then stood up and pulled the breeches.

Cregan bit his lips as his manhood grew large and erect.  "Would you... like to take the initiative, Princess?" he said to Y/N.

"No," Y/N replied. She lied on the bed next to him and whispered in his ears, "Get on top of me, My Lord." She then kissed his ears and his cheek.

Cregan did not take much time to get up from the bed and climb on top of her. Soon after, he felt her legs parting. He pinned her hands down and kissed her lips.

He claimed her four times that night.

They were in each other's arms, panting from the lovemaking.

"Princess, what has gotten into you lately?"

"I don't know, My Lord."

"Cregan...call me Cregan...at least when we are in bed."

"Fine...Cregan. But 'My Lord' is better. Rolls off the tongue easily."

"Is it so?"

"Yes"

"I am glad to have you like this... happy, enthusiastic and... not sad."

"You are a good man, Cregan."

"Am I?"

"Yes"

"I have something to say, if you do not mind," Cregan said, hesitantly.

"What is it?" Y/N asked.

"It is about your brother...Prince Jacaerys," Cregan replied.

"I know what you want to say," Y/N stated. "But let me tell you, Jacaerys has done many wrong things and I can never forgive him for that. And let me tell you, the war is not over."

"I do not understand."

"You do...you do understand so well...but you pretend not to."

"I might understand better if you don't talk in riddles."

"After my mother dies, who do you think will be a stronger claimant for the Iron Throne? The Prince of Dragonstone, the eldest son of the Queen, a bastard? Or Aegon, the eldest trueborn son of the Queen? The Lords might accept a woman as their king. But will they accept a bastard as their king when there are other trueborn claimants? And whom do you think will Daemon support?"

"Daemon's daughter will be married to Jacaerys."

"Baela poses no threat to Aegon's rule. On the other hand, Aegon poses the greatest threat to Jacaerys' rule. Daemon will certainly know to choose his own blood."

"And which brother will you choose?"

"You will choose your dear friend Jace and so will the entire North after you. Additionally, Lord Manderly's youngest daughter will be married to Joffrey. That will also play a part. But if you ask me... I will choose Aegon. I shall not let anyone deprive my brother of his birthright."

At that moment, the dreams that she had in the past few days, flashed before her eyes. They were horrible nightmares. She could see her blood soaked gown from the time when she had lost Aemond's child. She could see Jaehaerys lying on the floor, in a pool of his blood, with his head gone. And she could see the bloated corpse of Aemond deep in the water of the God's Eye.

A year later :

"Our little girl is so lovely, isn't she?" Cregan said, touching the cheeks of the little baby in Y/N's arms.

"Of course she is. After all, she is my daughter," Y/N said, giggling.

"But I do believe that she has my grey eyes," Cregan replied, playfully narrowing his eyes.

"She does," Y/N said, smiling.

Just then, the Maester arrived.

"My Lord! My Princess!"

"What is the matter, Maester? Why are you so worried? Is it something related to Y/N or the babe?"

"No, My Lord. But the news is terrible."

"What is it?"

"Lord Manderly's youngest daughter, the one betrothed to Prince Joffrey, broke her neck while learning to ride a horse and died this morning."

"I shall write to Lord Manderly and offer my condolences."

Just as Cregan stood up and left, Y/N looked at the baby in her arms and kissed her forehead. "You will be the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, my dear daughter," she whispered to the child who was barely a month old.

..

..

..

To be continued

Tags : @anime-lover-forever-1127 @24k-raptor @sandrellymendonca

Special mention : @reylatargaryen (There is something special for you)

[athzhowakar]

Hands As Cold As Ice ❄️

⚜️ Pairing : Cregan Stark × Female!Reader

⚜️ Period : Post Dance AU where Jacaerys and Daemon are alive. Rhaenyra is the Queen.

⚜️ Synopsis : The widow of Prince Aemond and the daughter of Queen Rhaenyra is to marry Lord Cregan Stark as a means to secure a political alliance. The princess marries Cregan despite not wanting to do so.

⚜️ Trigger warnings : Intimate scenes ahead, mention of death, kind of non-consent, depression, incompatible relationships.

⚜️ Next part : (Tap here)

It had been a month since Queen Rhaenyra had taken the throne. Princess Y/N was strolling in the garden and gazing at the walls of the Red Keep. It had only been four months since she became a widow with an empty belly. She loved her mother, she loved her mother's husband who had raised her, she loved her brothers and she loved her cousins. That was the sole reason behind escaping the Red Keep after her poor dear brother, Lucerys was killed by her very own husband. She had disliked Aemond, loved him and hated him. After all this time, she missed him. She did not understand by which sorcery, Daemon and his dragon survived something which Aemond and Vhagar could not. Caraxes was wounded. But wounds heal, lives do not come back.

Y/N had been wearing black for quite some time. They thought it was to show loyalty to the 'Blacks'. But she herself knew and so did a few others, that she was mourning her husband. Because despite everything, he loved her. He used to look at her with the one eye the Gods had spared him and smile. She used to play with his long silken silver hair and kiss him. Now that he was gone, there was no one to hold her.

She had moved into her dead husband's chamber after Queen Rhaenyra had taken the Red Keep. For she feared that anyone else would throw away Aemond's things and she would have nothing to remember him with. The war was a tragedy for everyone. It broke several families. One of them was her own.

Y/N had many responsibilities during the war. She could not spare time to cry for her husband whom she had left in the Red Keep or cry for her husband who had died fighting her step father. She did not get the time to grieve for the child which she had lost during the war either. Sometimes she wondered, "Did my mother know about my child? Were she and Daemon responsible for me losing my child?" Difficult times do not grant the luxury of such leisurely thinking. She called it the will of the Gods and carried on.

While she was walking, she saw a man approaching her. She had not seen him before but still, she recognised him. People had described him enough.

"Princess Y/N"

"Lord Stark"

"It is good to see you."

"I am glad to see you too, My Lord. I hope that your stay in the capital is comfortable."

"I am sure it will be, My Princess."

"Why are you so sure?"

"I was... being polite."

"That's nice of you to do so."

"Your mother suggested we spend some time together and get to know each other. After all, we have to be ready for what is to come."

"I... don't understand, My Lord. What is to come?"

"Why? Our wedding. Prince Jacaerys wanted it to happen as soon as possible. He insisted on getting us married next week."

Lord Cregan Stark said with a smile. Y/N's eyes widened in shock. Her eyes filled with tears of pain and anger. Before she could say anything, Jacaerys appeared. He said to Cregan, "My Lord, I would like to borrow my sister for a moment." He held her hand and took her inside the Keep.

While in the hallway, Y/N freed her hand from Jacaerys' grip. Jacaerys looked at her. He knew that his sister wanted answers.

"Y/N... Sister...listen to me"

"LISTEN TO WHAT?"

"It was an alliance. We needed the support of the North."

"So you promised my hand to him?"

"It is your duty. All of us need to perform our duties."

"Do not dare to talk to me about duties. I know what duties are."

"Then why are you fretting?"

"WHY SHOULD I NOT? You didn't think that it was necessary to consult me before making a decision on my life?"

"I had to make certain decisions on my own, Y/N. You are not the only one whose matches were arranged by me. I arranged the matches for Joffrey and Aegon too."

"They are babes! They can't give an opinion about matches. But I am not a babe!"

"This was a diplomatic decision. Lord Stark gains an advantageous match and we get his men."

"And was insisting on getting me married next week also a part of your great diplomacy?"

"Sister....listen..."

Jacaerys had not even finished speaking when he felt a blow on his face. He looked up to see his sister's tear stricken face and eyes filled with rage. She started slapping and punching him. When he fell down, she started kicking him.

The guards separated them with some difficulty. In this commotion, Y/N fell on the ground. Facing the cold hard floor, she started sobbing. Lord Corlys and Queen Rhaenyra were informed about the argument and they rushed to the site. Rhaenyra was horrified to see her daughter sobbing in that way and then her eyes fell on her son, who was bleeding from his broken nose. Lord Corlys helped Y/N get up. She hugged him and started sobbing even louder. The old Lord only caressed her head to comfort her.

Y/N did not want to cry. She had not cried openly after Aemond's death. But now, she could not stop crying.

Coincidentally, everything happened outside the chamber in which Dowager Queen Alicent was confined. She had heared and understood everything. She felt strange. She did not know that there was someone else who mourned her poor child. She had not expected the mourner to be the very same wife who had abandoned her son to join his enemies.

Later that night, Lord Corlys, Prince Jacaerys and Prince Daemon were discussing the situation with Queen Rhaenyra in her chamber.

"My granddaughter has done nothing to deserve this," Lord Corlys said, angrily.

"We are not punishing her. It is an advantageous marriage. She will be wed to the Warden of the North. She will be the Lady of Winterfell," Jacaerys replied.

Corlys approached him and said, "Are you blind? Can you not see that your sister is in pain? She is grieving!"

"Grieving for a traitor!" Jacaerys almost shouted.

"Do not talk of treachery, My Prince. We all know who the traitors, liars and usurpers are," Corlys said with a low tone hinting at something. "What I am trying to say is, my granddaughter is entitled to her feelings. She did what was right. She fought for the rightful queen. Now, if she wants to grieve her husband, she should be allowed to. It doesn't matter which side her husband fought for. What I know is, he loved my granddaughter."

"My Lord," Rhaenyra said. "I have seen my daughter. She is lonely. If she doesn't get married, she will only continue to grieve. I want her to start a new family."

"War has left scars on our chests, Your Grace. I lost my wife. I know about the pain," Corlys replied.

Daemon had been silently listening to everyone till now. He spoke up, "My Lord, the date for the wedding has already been fixed. Changing it will not be a good idea. Lord Stark might think that we do not intend to wed our daughter to him at all and he might take this as an insult."

"So will my granddaughter not even get a year to grieve?" Corlys asked, with tears in his eyes.

Daemon replied, "I am afraid not, My Lord."

Corlys did not say anything further. He bowed to Rhaenyra and left the chamber.

Corlys searched for his granddaughter everywhere in the Red Keep but could not find her. The search continued for some time before he found Y/N in one of the least frequented part of the Godswood. She was sitting by the fire which she lit herself. In that fire, she was throwing one thing after the other. He approached her.

Y/N was throwing several things into the fire. Books, papers, letters, clothes made of wool, clothes made of the finest silk, leather and many other things.

"What are you doing, my dear?"

"I am burning his things."

"Why are you doing that?"

"It is better to burn them myself than to see them being thrown away by someone who doesn't care about them."

"Granddaughter....."

"I should have burned his body. He should have gotten a funeral. I could give him nothing. I couldn't even save him. I am such a failure as a wife."

Corlys wished he could say something to calm her. But the deeper he thought, the sadder he became. It was indeed true. Y/N had been an ideal daughter, an ideal sister and even an ideal granddaughter. But she could not exactly fulfil her duties as a wife.

"No man is flawless, my dear. Besides, it is not your fault. You only did what you thought was the right thing to do."

"I loved him so much....Why did he have to be on the Usurper's side?"

Corlys could not answer her. He sat beside her and watched her cry as she burned all of her dead husband's possessions one by one.

Once everything was burned, Y/N was exhausted from crying. She kept her head on Corlys' lap and closed her eyes.

"Grandsire..."

"Say it, Granddaughter."

"Can you take me to Driftmark for a few days? This place suffocates me."

"That will be good. I shall talk to your mother about that."

Even though Rhaenyra had denied to postpone the wedding, she could not deny Lord Corlys when he expressed his desire to take his granddaughter with him to Driftmark for a few days. However, she did that on the condition that he would bring her back for the wedding on time.

The wedding was a grand affair. Many Lords attended the wedding with their wives, sons and daughters. Prince Jacaerys and Prince Daemon were talking to the Lords in the feast.

Y/N was getting dressed for the wedding. She had worn a cloth-of-gold gown. Her necklace had rubies and her earrings had them too. Her hair was braided and arranged around her temples like ram's horns and then covered by a hairnet.

Rhaenyra entered the chamber to see her daughter already dressed.

"You look very beautiful, Y/N," Rhaenyra said, smiling at her daughter.

Getting no response from her, she asked the ladies-in-waiting to leave them alone. She then made her daughter sit beside her on the bed and said, "Y/N, I know that this is hard for you. I do not blame you for loving my half-brother. He was a good husband to you. Besides, we do not choose whom we love."

Y/N only stared at her mother and said no word. Rhaenyra held her hands and said, "Lord Stark is a good man. He will keep you happy. I want you to accept him and start a new life. Be a good wife to him, give him children. Do your duty to him. You cannot hold on to the past forever. You have to let go."

Y/N wanted to say, "If you had let go of your foolish feelings for Harwin Strong, then our lives would have been much easier." But she remained silent.

Rhaenyra made her stand and put the cloak containing the colours of House Targaryen and House Velaryon around her shoulders.

Rhaenyra had tears in her eyes. "Will you not speak to your mother at all?" she said.

"Did you kill my child?" Y/N said, with a voice which was barely louder than a whisper.

"Child?" Rhaenyra asked, bewildered.

"Yes, the child in my belly...Aemond's child...which I lost only a few days after fleeing to Dragonstone," Y/N replied. She asked again, "Did you kill that child?"

"Oh my poor child!" Rhaenyra burst into tears. "I would never. I did not even know that you were with child. Trust me, I have done no such thing."

"If you say so," Y/N replied with a cracked voice.

Rhaenyra was crying. But Y/N did not want to look at her. She was not fully convinced. She walked out of her chamber and saw her brother Jacaerys standing outside her chamber.

"It is time, Sister. I will be the one to give you away. Come with me," he said to her.

Y/N spoke no word to Jacaerys. She did not even look into his eyes. She walked with him through the hallways into the Castle Sept. He took her to the wedding altar with a smile on his face. Lord Cregan Stark was standing there with the most charming smile he could have. In front of him was someone who looked almost like a Goddess. However, like many men, he too failed to read her mind. But the other women present there didn't.

Dowager Queen Alicent saw her son's widow getting on the altar with a face as pale as snow. There was no joy in that face. It looked like someone has drained all the happiness out of her and she could burst into tears at any moment. Y/N's lips were dry and shaking. The area around her eyes had turned pink from frequent wiping of her tears.

"Poor child! Look what that whore has done to her own daughter!" Alicent said to herself.

The vows were exchanged. The septon blessed Y/N and Lord Stark and declared them man and wife. Now, it  was time for the bedding ceremony. Jacaerys was about to declare the starting of the ceremony when Rhaenyra glared at him, as if daring him to speak.

Daemon approached him and said, "My Prince, you do not want to make matters worse. Arranging this wedding already gave you a broken nose."

Jacaerys nodded.

Y/N was escorted to her chamber by her ladies-in-waiting. She sat on her bed reflecting on what her life had become. She saw the decorated bed. There was a knock on the door and it opened. Cregan entered through the door and shut it close from inside.

He approached her with a smile on his face. Y/N would have traded all the gold in the world for the ability to evaporate from that place at that moment. She tried not to show any signs of discomfort. "Stay calm," she kept telling herself repeatedly. She had married him and she needed to perform her duty.

Her gently kissed her cheek and said, "You look very beautiful, Princess. Just like the moon."

He took her right hand in his and said, "I am aware of everything. I will not force you to do anything that you don't want to. If you don't wish to lie with me, then it will be that way."

"That won't be necessary, My Lord," Y/N replied. "The marriage has to be consummated anyways."

"I am glad you think so," Cregan said. "And I want you to address me by my name, at least when we are on the bed."

It did not take much time for Cregan to undo the laces of her gown, nor did it take him much time to unbutton whatever buttons came in his way. Soon, Y/N was out of her gown and as naked as her nameday. She lied on the bed and tried not to look at Cregan getting undressed. He climbed on her and claimed her with quite a great passion. His touches however, contributed more towards triggering the memories of Aemond than it contributed towards pleasuring Y/N. She certainly did not like the way her body was betraying her mind.

Cregan claimed her several times that night. And fell asleep after rolling off her.

Y/N curled up on the other side of the bed and sobbed.

Cregan was very pleased with his wife. He had been a widower for a few years. He was glad to have a beautiful wife like Y/N by his side.

However, things were not so easy for Y/N. Pretending to be a wife was harder than she had imagined. After returning to Winterfell, Cregan visited her almost every night. "Filling your belly is one of my favourite things to do, you know," he used to say.

Cregan used to think that his wife likes to bed him but was shy. He used to think that the war had made her quiet and reserved. So, he used to try to cheer her up by saying those things. Little did he know that bedding him was the most traumatizing part of their marriage. Men can be so clueless sometimes.

Y/N's nights were sleepless. The first half of each night was taken by Cregan and the second half was spent crying. She preferred bathing alone. She used to rub her body vigorously to forget the feeling of Cregan's hands on her and to remove his scent from her body. The scent seemed to never go away, no matter how many perfumes she used on herself.

She started keeping to herself most of the time. She craved loneliness. She spoke very less and only if it was very important.

It was one of those nights. Cregan entered Y/N's chamber. She had worn only a thin gown for sleeping. Y/N's fingers started shaking when she saw him. She tried to calm herself by holding on to nearby objects. Cregan took off his robe and held her waist.

"Was I disturbing your sleep, my love?" Cregan asked.

"As you can see, I haven't slept yet, My Lord," Y/N replied.

Cregan turned her to face him. He caressed her face and touched her lips with his index finger. He said, "Do you know how beautiful a smile will look on these lips? I think you don't. Because if you did, you would smile more often."

Seeing no response, Cregan whispered into her ears, "Let us bet. If I make you scream in pleasure tonight, you will smile for me. What do you say?"

"Sure," Y/N replied.

Cregan bit her neck as he grabbed her waist. She had a weak spot somewhere near the waist and below the navel. He discovered it a few days ago. He pressed that area and saw his wife biting her lips.

Y/N clenched her fist so hard that her nails almost pierced her skin. "Just a few hours," she kept telling herself. On the other nights, Y/N did not only cry after the deed was done, but also in between. She made sure he didn't notice it. But that night, as Cregan turned her around to undress her, she could not control herself. He had finished undressing her when he moved the hair from her face and saw her face. The suppressed tears had finally fallen. She was crying.

"What happened?" Cregan asked.

"I can't do this...I can't anymore...I am sorry...I am sorry...I can't..." she kept saying.

She was hiding her bare breasts with her hands and had closed her legs. Cregan had never seen her like that. He panicked.

"I do not understand. What is the matter?" He asked.

"I can't do this... I don't want to do this... I did... I tried... I can't anymore..." Y/N kept saying tearfully.

Cregan covered her with the sheets. He sat at the edge of the bed. An hour later, Y/N had calmed down.

Cregan looked at her. His eyes were red.

He said, "On our wedding night, I asked you whether you wanted me to bed you or not. You said that you wanted to go for it. All this time, I had been trying to win your smile and happiness with my love, while you had been grieving for a dead man. You brought the load of your past marriage into ours. That dead man was and is everything to you. While I am nothing. You find my touch disgusting. Yet you lie with me every night and pretend to be the perfect wife. Tell me, Princess, was there anything that was real between us?"

"I am sorry... I can't..." Y/N said, when she was interrupted by Cregan.

"Stop that. I don't want to hear that. I don't want an apology. What I wanted...was honestly and that is clearly not your virtue," Cregan said.

He got up from the bed and wore his robe. He then walked out of the chamber.

A month had passed since that night. Cregan stopped coming to Y/N's chamber altogether. Now that he had realised that his wife actually loathed his presence, he avoided her completely. This sudden change in behaviour did not go unnoticed. It was a topic of gossip among the servants but he paid no heed to them. But the seed that Cregan had left in Y/N's belly did not seem to ignore her.

Y/N noticed that her moon blood was late. But she brushed it off thinking that it might have been caused because of stress.

She was sitting at a table in her chamber and waiting for the maid to bring her food. Cregan no longer dined with her. The maid brought chicken and mushroom pie. Y/N remembered that it was one of the things which she liked a lot. But as she took a bite out of it, she spat it out.

"Gods be damned! What is this?" She shouted at the maid.

"It's....the pie, Princess," the maid said, tearfully. The little girl got scared of the sudden outburst.

"You call this a pie?" Y/N asked. "Horse shit must taste better than this. Take this away from my eyes."

An older maid who was standing nearby signalled the maid to take away the remaining pie. The old woman brought some boiled potatoes and sprinkled some salt, poured a little vinegar and added some herbs to them, and then smashed them a little. She gave them to Y/N and said, "Try these, Princess."

"Boiled potatoes?" Y/N was confused.

"Just try it once, Princess," the old woman sighed.

Y/N took a bite of a potato and surprisingly, found it very savoury. She quickly finished all the potatoes. The maid then brought some pieces of lemons and asked her to eat them. Y/N ate them too.

When she was done, the maid said to her, "These are the early signs of being with child, Princess."

"Child? How do you know that?" Y/N inquired.

The maid smiled and said, "I am nine and eighty, Princess. I know a woman carrying a child when I see one. However, for your satisfaction, you should get yourself checked by the Maester. That old man is believed by everyone after all."

A chill ran down Y/N's spine. A child would change a lot of things. Besides, her relationship with Cregan was not good anymore. Truth to be told, she hoped for a daughter because a son had no future there. Cregan already had an heir. Her son would only be a second son who would stand to inherit nothing. A daughter, however, could be married off to a Lord.

She sent for the Maester. The maester arrived with haste. She shared her worries with him and he listened to all of them very attentively. He said to her, "Princess, it is very much possible that you are with child. Please lie down so that I can examine you."

After examining her, the Maester said to her with a smile, "You are to be a mother, Princess. Your doubts were indeed correct."

"How long have I been with child, Maester?" Y/N asked.

"One and a half months, Princess" he replied.

Just then, Cregan arrived at her chamber. They exchanged a brief glance. The maid had informed Cregan that Y/N might be with child and that's why, he had come to talk to her. On seeing the Maester, he asked him, "What did you find out, Maester?"

"The princess is indeed with child, My Lord. You are to be a father again," he replied. He then glanced at both Cregan and Y/N and said, "I shall take my leave now."

Cregan approached Y/N with slow steps and sat on the bed beside her.

"We are to have a child, Princess."

"Aye"

"Do you know what that means?"

"I do."

"Our child deserves parents who love each other."

"I know."

"What I am asking from you is, a chance. I want a chance to make you happy. We cannot play pretend husband and pretend wife in front of our child."

"I will try."

"Will you...truly? Or will you say that to my face and cry when I turn my back?"

Y/N burst into tears on hearing that. Cregan hugged her and kissed her forehead. He cupped her face and said, "Look, I know that you loved Prince Aemond a lot. I am not asking you to forget him. I have not forgotten my Arra. But you see, Arra and Aemond are our past. But the child in your belly is our present and future. I am not asking you to bed me. I am asking you to let me into your life and to let me take care of you. Because I married you to start a family with you. I want to love you."

Y/N was still silent. Cregan had gotten his answer. He said, "If that is your wish, I will stay away from you. But once the child is born, you will not try to keep it away from me. If you do so, I will not tolerate it. Because the child is mine and I will never ever give up on my child."

..

..

..

To be continued

Taglist : @anime-lover-forever-1127

[athzhowakar]

#My man would even adopt Tywin's children if Daenerys won the war or something

Avoiding work and thinking about how Ned just. Obtained children. Like as a threat.

My man came back from each war with a new kid, and would just recklessly open his home to any and all children. mans was a child collector and for what?

He took Theon in after the rebellion.

Came home with Jon.

Offered to foster sweet Robin.

Chronic sleepover-attendant Jeyne Poole.

Wanted to foster Robert’s bastards at Winterfell.

My mans is the dad of all time. Out here running a westerosi halfway house for children with daddy issues. If he’d had more page time, the place probably would’ve been packed with wards, foundlings, and orphaned noble children.

[athzhowakar]

[athzhowakar]

Imagine being SO horny. You're shaking with it. Make no mistake: you want to FUCK.

But! Instesd you have to do this show in front of all these people. And what's worse, once you get there, one of the other performers is 1) a hot guy and 2) into you. Like clearly into you. Like let's go right here into you.

Nevermind, you lock in and you give a pretty good performance. But the hot guy stumbles through his moves (because he's distracted by you. cute.) and his partner - a tiny guy who seems really entitled - ends up falling. No big deal, nobody was hurt and the crowd is applauding.

The tiny entitled guy doesn't see it like that. Just as you're thinking about going over to Hot Guy and introducing yourself with the intent to fuck, the entitled guy grabs a fucking sword and fucking BEHEADS him! Kills him in cold blood! And then they just let him walk out of there??? Where is the King's justice???

You are Ser Loras Tyrell's horse at the Hand's tourney.

[athzhowakar]

Pretty lucky cat 🍀🍀

Meow meow 💖💕

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.