atruemoomoon

[atruemoomoon]

I fucking hate that I still miss him. He did a full 180, and is so convinced that I’m a bad person now, but goddamn it I miss when he loved me.

He has taken so fucking much from my life and Still refuses to acknowledge any wrongdoing on his part whatsoever.

Our mutual friends keep reminding me to keep his fucking feelings in mind but He Hates Me Now and no one is telling him to keep my feelings in mind.

[atruemoomoon]

the neurodivergent experience:

20% of the time: wowwieee!!! i love my passions and interests!!!!! they make me so happy i want to jump up and down!!!!! weee!!!!!!! :3333333333

80% of the time: this mind is a prison

[atruemoomoon]

the way ppl have designated cuddling as a purely romantic thing and is weird outside of that context has done widespread damage to our pack animal nature

[atruemoomoon]

why must my joint pain exist in such a manner as to happen no matter what position I am in if I remain still long enough?

let me be comfy dammit

[atruemoomoon]

forehead press during missionary tn?? cupping your face in my hands and ragged breathing and pressing our foreheads together for a moment during a pause in missionary and you’re still inside me and everything in the world feels so so far away except for you tonight?????????

[atruemoomoon]

I keep having dreams where my ex actually apologizes and we figure things out and try again

But then he flips over a mistake I make or just leaves again and it becomes what our breakup was and I wake up feeling like shit and literally shaking because our breakup ended up going worst case scenario

I just wanna not care anymore man

[atruemoomoon]

I have like, political philosophy brainrot. I Cannot stop thinking about it, and making my own theories(essentially just the way I think the world both works and should work)

Thomas Hobbes I’ll kill you for this

[atruemoomoon]

sometimes you’ve been waiting to hear someone say something but only realize it because someone else finally says it

[atruemoomoon]

Tumblr please, if you’re gonna make the ads This Fucking Ridiculous, you could at least let me reblog it.

What is the quality room? I have no clue and frankly I don’t know if they do either

[atruemoomoon]

My most delusional fantasy is that he’s as crushed by the breakup as I am, that he can’t help being reminded of me in the littlest things everyday like I can’t, that he wants to ask about me as badly as I do about him.

My most delusional fantasy is that the him who I had for a year, the one who put in effort, the one who felt like he was trying to do better, who felt like he loved me as much as I loved him, that him comes back into my life.

[atruemoomoon]

the groundhog reportedly saw "a blood red sun. in the foreground a massive wheel framing the sun in the sky. the wheel has ceased to turn". nobody is sure what this means but its probably fine

[atruemoomoon]

It feels like I’ve tripped and dusted myself off, gotten up on my own, and the people around me would check in. Make sure I was okay, express sympathy that it happened.

But this time, when I was dangling off the edge of a ravine, begging for someone to help me up over the edge, they walked away.

They said, “you’ve fallen before and gotten up by yourself, you’ll do it again” and left me behind.

“Not this time. Not alone,” I pleaded, yet almost everyone still walked away.

[atruemoomoon]

Think I might start putting art on here

I’ve been sorta directing feelings into this, but idk if I wanna try and explain them. So, up to interpretation

[atruemoomoon]

My school has an ice cream bar in the dining hall, and Sometimes they have graham cracker crumbs as a topping.

Whenever I see they have them, I get a bowl of soft serve Vanilla and use about a 1:1 ratio of Crumb to Cream.

It’s my bowl of Sand.

You ever decide "fuck it", put an unreasonable amount of brown sugar into your yogurt and grind a bag of assorted nuts into freshly ground nut crumbs, mix it all together and add some raisins and then just eat your luxury gravel out of a bowl with a spoon.

[atruemoomoon]

just made the best non-looping gif i think

[atruemoomoon]

i love cis people cause when i say “when i used to be a girl…” they go “mhmm…. but also….. you’ve ALWAYS been a man” okay ur very sweet but actually i was a weird girl in middle school and you need to know that to understand my personality today

[atruemoomoon]

I am angry.

I am angry that I am not allowed to focus on myself.

I am angry that I am not allowed to be selfish.

I am angry that you can only think that my explanations must center you.

I am angry that, despite saying it time and time again, no one will actually Tell me when I do something wrong.

I am angry that everyone assumes I am doing something with malicious intent, and then accepts that assumption as fact.

I am angry.

Me trying to deal with and explain MY problems should not become me blaming you for them, especially when I say many times that it is not.

How much clearer can I be?

I trust(ed) you, so I go to you for help, and that clearly means I’m manipulating you.

I say, over and over, that I don't want to cause harm or discomfort, so why is it my fault when you don’t tell me that I am.

At what point will you acknowledge how your actions impacted Me? Because I don’t feel that you have.