bitchin-slytherin

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finally, some good fucking content

I’m not kidding when I say I screamed at the top of my lungs

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au where everything is the same except sirius black is played by jonathan van ness from queer eye

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Just let us rest, please

most fans: please creators tell us more canon information please

harry potter fans: we will pay you to Stop.

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This is Sailor J on Youtube! Please follow her, she's also done these types of videos for Zodiacs and Hogworts houses!

fucking christ I am sobbing

“If the men find out we can shapeshift, they’re going to tell the church!“

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What do you mean this isn't canon

I think one of the reasons the Harry Potter Epilogue was so poorly received was because the audience was primarily made up of the Millennial generation.

We’ve walked with Harry, Ron and Hermione, through a world that we thought was great but slowly revealed itself to be the opposite. We unpeeled the layers of corruption within the government, we saw cruelty against minorities grow in the past decades, and had media attack us and had teachers tell us that we ‘must not tell lies’. We got angry and frustrated and, like Harry, Ron and Hermione, had to think of a way to fight back. And them winning? That would have been enough to give us hope and leave us satisfied.

But instead. There was skip scene. And suddenly they were all over 30 and happy with their 2.5 children.

And the Millennials were left flailing in the dust.

Because while we recognised and empathised with everything up to that point. But seeing the Golden Trio financially stable and content and married? That was not something our generation could recognise. Because we have no idea if we’re ever going to be able to reach that stage. Not with the world we’re living in right now.

Having Harry, Ron and Hermione stare off into the distance after the battle and wonder about what the future might be would have stuck with us. Hell, have them move into a shitty flat together and try and sort out their lives would have. Have them with screaming nightmares and failed relationships and trying to get jobs in a society that’s falling apart would have. Have them still trying to fix things in that society would have. Because we known Voldemort was just a symptom of the disease of prejudice the Wizarding World.

But don’t push us off with an ‘all was well’. In a world about magic, JK Rowling finally broke our suspension of disbelief by having them all hit middle-class and middle-age contentment and expecting a fanbase of teenagers to accept it.

Also. Since when was ‘don’t worry kids, you’re going to turn out just like your parents’ ever a happy ending? Does our generation even recognise marriage and money and jobs as the fulfillment of life anymore? Does our generation even recognise the Epilogue’s Golden Trio anymore?

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WHERES MY 'THE EVIL HS BEEN DEFEATED' GIF

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH, BITCHES, PEATHERS HAS BEEN CANCELLED.

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Y'all: Andy is leaving TWD

Me, a petty bitch who's been waiting for TWD crash and burn since they killed off Carl:

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This is important.

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I'm 90% sure this person is a ethereal fae princess coming to bless us with cute selfies

the nice lady at the jewelry booth let me take a ton of selfies with this necklace even though i couldnt afford to buy it

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Ahatven. Cool.

YOUR DRAGON NAME

last two letters of your first name

middle two letters of your last name

first two letters of your mother’s name

last letter of your father’s name

mine would be Urlelan. Reblog and tag this with yours!

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Is this Brokeback Mountain, LOTR, or A Song of Achilles

….they really had sex on that mountain with absolutely no lube

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Concept: That scene in every 90s high school movie where someone shows the new kid around the cafeteria (”that table is the nerds, those are the jocks, the goths, the cheerleeders” etc) except it’s a medieval tavern and each table has a different d&d class.

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I'M SCREAMING

baby ginny sitting herself down in professor lupin’s office hours with her eyebrows furrowed and lupin’s like “shit” bc ginny is an excellent student and very observant and contrary and less likely to take shit than even hermione granger and is rather reminiscent of other red-haired gryffindor women he has known

“i know you’re a werewolf,” she blurts

“oh?” he says though he is thinking shit shit shit shit shit

“yes, and I don’t care,” she says forcefully

“oh?” he says again, though he is carefully not feeling anything

“yeah, I know what it’s like to be possessed by something evil. it doesn’t make you evil,” she says

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Okay so my friends & i are pretty new to D&D (translation: we only know it from E.T. and Stranger Things) so after a quick run down of races and rules and such, the Game Master (the only person who actually knows how to play) gave us a 'test' to pick are classes. I don't remember the exact question, but it had something to do with facing a dragon. So we're all sitting there and Luke goes "We can do whatever? I wanna use magic and the power of friendship to beat up the dragon". So he's quickly appointed to Warlock. So we go around the circle getting our classes and when it stops on one girl. She seems kinda embarrassed and we're just like "dude theres no judgement here!!" because we're a bunch of liers. She just pauses, stares at us, and whispers

"Can I seduce the dragon?"

She was very quickly appointed Bard (and continued to try to fuck every creature we came across)

Three types of D&D classes:

Those that derail the adventure by saying “I’m gonna kill it”

Those that derail the adventure by saying “I’m gonna steal it”

Those that derail the adventure by saying “I’m gonna fuck it”

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LEAVE MY BOYS A L O N E THEY'RE JUST BABIES THEY DONT DESERVE THIS

“Shh, it’s alright,” the villain said. “You’re doing beautifully and I’m so proud of you. But that’s enough now. It was cruel of them to make you fight me - you could never have won. It’s not your fault.”

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I love this

what if elle woods from legally blonde had been harry’s lawyer during his hearing in the order of the phoenix