cartoonscientist

[cartoonscientist]

if there were a realistic horror movie about astral projection it would just be a three minute short of a thirty year old dude coming out of a trance on his couch and rubbing his eyes going “ahhhhh fuck my cousin definitley molested me when I was six god fucking damn it”

is it the fearmongering about meditation and lucid dreaming that pisses you off because honestly it boggles my mind that mainstream horror is like “astral projection is fucking dangerous as hell, don’t you dare try to learn any inner truths about yourself!! but you know what’s super cool and safe? TRADITIONAL CATHOLIC EXORCISM!”

[cartoonscientist]

is it the fearmongering about meditation and lucid dreaming that pisses you off because honestly it boggles my mind that mainstream horror is like “astral projection is fucking dangerous as hell, don’t you dare try to learn any inner truths about yourself!! but you know what’s super cool and safe? TRADITIONAL CATHOLIC EXORCISM!”

[cartoonscientist]

actually iirc jesus is quoted in the book of steve as saying “if you’re going to smoke crack I guess that’s your perforative but bro you gotta at least test that shit it’s called harm reduction dawg”

[cartoonscientist]

[cartoonscientist]

when john mulaney said that the dude he thought was a drug dealer was actually just a painter I was immediately like “oh yeah that makes sense” because whether that guy is a house painter or an artist it still tracks

[cartoonscientist]

I’m not saying these people are going to get comically swallowed up by a gaping hellmouth while their televengalist leader sprouts devil horns and says some shit like “haha! thou hath been deceived!!” like a scene in a Chick tract, I’m just saying that if they did I wouldn’t be surprised

[cartoonscientist]

a person gets hit by a truck and isekai’d into a fantasy world but they’re unable to shake the feeling that this is all just a dying hallucination and they live their whole life expecting to either wake up or fade into unconsciousness but then they eventually expire of old age on their deathbed and wake up in another fantasy universe and so on and so forth until they meet god and they’re like “did I finally die” and god is like “uh no you ascended through all the planes of existence and now you get to create your own reality if you want, I’m honestly really surprised that you never noticed being reincarnated over millennia”

[cartoonscientist]

screaming

[cartoonscientist]

there’s this thread on reddit right now that’s basically “why do the queers still mask?” and all the comments are like “androgen disruption causes chronic illness and the transgay! virtue signaling tumblr wokelets!”

“autistic personality style”? is that what we’re doing now instead of kibbe? you guys, I just CAN’T get along with my project partner, she’s a limpid autumn autistic ingenue and I’m a wrathful spring schizophrenic jezebel!

okay cool I guess you’re an expert on Autistic People, mister professor, but where does that leave people with ADHD or schizophrenia? are they all just really into cybertechgearshit and east asian street fashion? because that’s why I’m still wearing a mask personally

then finally one person was just like “probably the whole AIDS crisis thing? idk” and you know what credit to them because I myself hadn’t even considered that cultural trauma

[cartoonscientist]

daily feral butch/twunk post

today I rode like eight miles on my cargo trike to art school and back and when I came home I ate five jack in the box chicken strips with dipping sauce 🤘💪

[cartoonscientist]

honestly the reason I play up my porn genre tags online is because irl people can actually be pretty mean to feminine men and muscular women so it’s nice to inhabit a space sometimes where people like me are openly sexualized instead of normie shit like “she’s hot but she’s got man shoulders”, I want people to think I’m hot BECAUSE OF my man shoulders!

[cartoonscientist]

I have to carry my art supplies to college in a 45L tactical backpack because there are so many

[cartoonscientist]

in part of my dream last night cassandra nova was the instructor for one of my college classes and I thought she was really hot but I also felt the ick to some extent because I knew I wasn’t in an appropriate position to flirt with her and I might jeopardize my academic standing if I allow myself to be attracted to her, plus having a crush on a fictional elderly woman is very different from having a crush on a real person who is in a wildly different life stage and power position than you, and my heart is, perhaps unfortunately, extremely ethical. even in dreams where I can do anything I want, which frustrates me to no end. I think I even became lucid at one point because my phone had been stolen, and I was very upset because I SAW the lady who took it and tried to chase her down, and then I was like “just chill out, when you wake up you’ll still have your phone, and I bet if you look in your purse and expect it to be there it will be there”, and it was! but I tend to immediately forget my insight immediately after becoming lucid, also unfortunately.

I think Cassandra may have been doing some distinctly fucked up magic school bus parody shit (which involved our vehicle being attacked by tapeworms) which also frankly should have tipped me off that I was in a situation where it was okay to hit on my professor.

anyway, despite my efforts to keep it in my pants, we had some time together during an open house of sorts where a lot of the campus (which is a disused naval base/lighthouse/hotel with some kind of weird nuclear reactor shit and a dimensionally fucked freight elevator in one of the tallest towers that I won’t go into right now) was open for touring and she started doing this weird hand analysis/palm reading thing to me, and I’m ashamed to admit I’m such a gerontophile that the sensation of her bony-ass crepey hands and long nails caressing mine was was extremely vivid. she said “you have ovulate nails” in the same tone as one would say “you know what they say about men with big hands”, although the implication was unclear. ever the sexual powerhouse, I replied with the underwear-soaking line “my mom says I have long, graceful thumbs” (which she recently did irl)

[cartoonscientist]

in my mental theatre the daughter is actually a cis-passing trans man who is extremely camp gay and his whole dinner party act is going right over her head

[cartoonscientist]

we have trip house, witch house, brunch house, but what about waffle house or gregory house?

[cartoonscientist]

Art Deco Ingrid perfume bottle made of malachite glass by Riedel Glassworks, depicting a figure beneath a waterfall, Bohemia, Czech Republic, 1930s.

[cartoonscientist]

浅草 大勝館1935年 Taishokan Theatre, Asakusa, Tokyo, 1935

Ernest B. Schoedsack’s The Son of Kong.