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[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

After the most aggressive marketing campaign since the Crusades, SPEAK NO EVIL is finally here. More importantly, we never have to see the trailer ever again. As its own thing, it’s actually pretty fun! As a remake of SPEAK NO EVIL (2022), it fails epically.

The story follows Ben (Scoot McNairy), Louise (Mackenzie Davis), and their daughter Agnes (Alix West Lefler) as they go to visit some new friends they recently met while vacationing in Italy. After moving to London and having some marital difficulties, going to the county for a long weekend seems like just what they need, even if they barely know the people they’ll be visiting. Upon arriving, things become increasingly uncomfortable as their hosts display behavior that is, shall we say, a bit out of the norm.

As the villainous hosts, James McAvoy and Aisling Franciosi are nearly pitch perfect. McAvoy in particular seems to be having a blast with the material, and is far more sinister than the campy performance the marketing suggested, thankfully. Davis and McNairy do as well as they can in their straight man roles, and I wish I could have seen them dig to the depths that were asked of the performers in the original, but that’s not the movie we got. I was, however, impressed by the child actors! Dan Hough’s Art and Lefler’s Agnes were surprisingly nuanced for people their age.

The original SPEAK NO EVIL was one of my favorite horror films of 2022, and one of the bleakest movie watching experiences I’ve ever had (complimentary), so with America’s track record of diluting foreign horror when we do the inevitable remake, I was nervous to say the least. The experience of watching this remake was fascinating and maddening all at the same time. On one hand, I was really enjoying myself, even though I was fully prepared to aggressively hate it. On the other hand, when the film did the generic thing that I had been expecting ever since the project was announced, I was furious. James Watkins, director of EDEN LAKE, doing a neutered and defanged version of SPEAK NO EVIL was not exactly on my bingo card for the year.

If you aren’t familiar with the Danish original, you’ll more than likely really enjoy this. It doesn’t reinvent the horror movie wheel, and is about fifteen minutes too long, but it’s largely inoffensive. If you are familiar with the original version, you’ll probably want to walk out of the theater about two-thirds of the way through. Will I ever understand why we felt the need to do an American remake of a film only two years old that’s largely in English already? Absolutely not. Did it do exactly what I was afraid of it doing? One hundred percent. I don’t think it succeeds as a remake, and fundamentally misunderstands the material, but ultimately, the films are doing very different things, and I have to give it props for trying to distinguish itself, if nothing else. It’s worth a rental at least for McAvoy’s performance alone, but unlike the vacationers, maybe choose to sit this one out.

3.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Tim Burton’s legacy sequel BEETLEJUICE BEETLEJUICE is finally here, a mere thirty-six years after the original captivated fans the world over back in the late eighties. Is it worth the wait? Not really, but it’s still not a bad way to spend a couple hours at the movies.

The story is truly all over the place, with far too many characters and plot threads that never reach anything nearing a satisfying conclusion. But the main gist of the story involves the living characters from the original coming together after a death shakes the family to its core. At least, that’s what we’re told. Nobody seems very bothered in the finished product. Lydia (Winona Ryder, wearing a series of ever more hilarious faces) is now apparently a television host in the vein of Ghost Hunters. She has a daughter, Astrid (Jenna Ortega, trapped playing a teenager yet again), who steadfastly believes that ghosts aren’t real. Delia (Catherine O’Hara, doing her thing) is at least still recognizable as the character we know and love from years gone by. As for the titular Beetlejuice (Michael Keaton), although I feel he got far too much screentime, he is still up to his mischievous ways. We’ve also got plot lines following Justin Theroux’s cringy Rory, Willem Dafoe’s undead detective Wolf Jackson, Arthur Conti’s boy-next-door Jeremy, and the most underutilized of all: Monica Bellucci as soul sucking villainess Delores. Exhausting, isn’t it?

A lot of what doesn’t work feels like mistakes that a first time director would make. Being so excited to finally get to make a movie that they try desperately to cram all their ideas into one film, and as a result none of it gets executed very well. On the bright side, the glorious practical effects work is still stellar. If you’re a fan of old school practical effects, this film will fill you with glee from shrunken head to dismembered toes. The jokes, when they land, *are* very funny. Unfortunately, the ratio of jokes that work and jokes that don’t isn’t in the ideal range. You’ll be groaning nearly as often as you laugh. That being said, humor is subjective, so take that with a grain of salt, I suppose.

Ultimately, it’s a fun, yet deeply flawed and frustrating watch. I had less of an issue with it than some as I’m not the biggest fan of the original film, so I’m not precious about the material. I think wasting Monica Bellucci is the biggest sin it commits, and I don’t believe for a second that Lydia would go into television for a career, but otherwise, I had a fun time! It has less heart than its predecessor, feels shallow, and never really justifies its existence; but in this age of countless legacy sequels and reboots, this is definitely better than it had to be. Cautiously recommend.

3.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️1/2

I love a good ultra low budget indie horror movie, but “good” is not an adjective I would use to describe Joshua Recene’s DEMON BEHIND THE GLASS.

The overly convoluted plot follows disgraced journalist Jonathan Birdsall (Adam Holley) who is searching for redemption in all the wrong places. Specifically, he is following a fracking story and decided to stay in a house that any sane person would politely ask for his or her money back upon arrival. Naturally, he soon discovers a body behind the bathroom mirror. Being a cartoonish sketch of an actual human being, he is remarkably unbothered and instead decides this should be his comeback story.

The actors are doing their best, but clearly are confused by the material they’re working with at any given time. The only one who largely escapes without embarrassment is Jessica Nogaret. Her portrayal of a pregnant widow caught up this demonic romp was the only performance I halfway believed, even if the plot details surrounding her made zero sense in the context of the story.

DEMON BEHIND THE GLASS unfortunately falls prey to the same misfortune to which many new directors succumb; they are so excited to be making a film that they try to throw everything and the kitchen sink into their feature. There’s a good movie buried in here, but it’s like digging for an earring you lost in the mud. You might find it, but you’re not going to be in a good mood from the experience.

If you’re looking for an innovative micro budget horror, I suggest checking out BRIGHTWOOD instead.

1.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Eggers brothers’ THE FRONT ROOM is a hot mess of a film, but it’s a helluva lot of fun.

The film follows Belinda (Brandy Norwood), a very pregnant anthropology professor, who allows her overworked husband’s (Andrew Burnap) estranged stepmother (a devilish Kathryn Hunter) to move in - against his better judgment- after the death of his father. What ensues is a hilarious and often disgusting battle of wills between the two matriarchs. Unfortunately, it’s also bogged down with a lot of unnecessary details and plot points that ultimately come to nothing.

On the bright side, the performances are very fun to watch! Brandy is always magnetic onscreen, and the relatability of her situation makes you want to scream if you think even for a second about what you would do in her shoes. Kathryn Hunter’s Solange is a hoot, and she’s clearly having the time of her life in the role of a mother in law from hell. Burnap is mostly just there to look pretty and is relegated to the stereotypical spouse role usually reserved for women, which, while refreshing, still had me wishing he was just a bit more fleshed out.

While I don’t think the Egger brothers were even remotely the right fit for this type of material, some stuff in here is quite effective. The film is extremely gross (complimentary), and the people in my screening were having very visceral reactions to the bodily fluids we were “treated” to at every turn. It was enough for me to call my partner as I was walking to my car and make him promise me that, no matter what, our parents were never allowed to move in.

While I did have a marvelous time with this, the flaws in the script (also by the brothers Eggers) are too much for me to recommend THE FRONT ROOM in good conscience. I only gave this the rating I did based on the fun factor alone, and it *is* fun; I cackled loudly a great deal during the blessedly brief runtime. I suppose I’ll just have to continue dreaming about a time when studios will let a female POC tell a story like this. I guarantee it would have been a much better film.

3/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

WOW! JT Mollner’s STRANGE DARLING is electrifying, and hands down one of the best theatrical experiences I’ve had all year. I cannot wait to make everyone I know watch it.

The twists and turns the story takes are best experienced as cold as possible (and in a theater!), so if I seem vague on the details, it’s out of respect for my fellow movie lovers. All I can really say is that it involves a one night stand that goes all kinds of wrong when the hookup ends up being a serial killer. The story is not told in chronological order, and it’s one of the most delicious uses of the format I’ve ever seen. Knowing what’s to come and anticipating how it got to that point has never been more exciting.

The two leads (Kyle Gallner and Willa Fitzgerald) are perfectly matched. As a longtime Gallner fan, seeing him sink his teeth into a role like this was nothing short of exquisite. Pairing him with Fitzgerald - who I’m becoming a huge fan of since her remarkable performance in last year’s THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER - is inspired. The raw energy they both bring to this project is breathtaking. The film is essentially a two-hander, so the casting is crucial. Thankfully, they nailed it with these two performers.

I laughed, I gasped, and at one point outright cackled with fiendish glee on this blood soaked journey through the Pacific Northwest. A murderous battle of the sexes has never been so much fun. If this isn’t playing near you, *beg* your local theater to program it, trust me.

4.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️

Mikael Håfström’s SLINGSHOT had potential. Unfortunately, the final product is an utter slog. The characters in it get to go to hypersleep, but the unwitting audience members have no such reprieve from the boredom they’ll be subjected to during the 108 minutes they’ll be trapped in their seats.

We follow John (Casey Affleck, sleepwalking his way to a paycheck), an astronaut undertaking a first-of-its-kind mission to one of Saturn’s moons in an attempt to get a source of clean energy to save an Earth that is quickly on its way to being uninhabitable. Along on this voyage are Captain Franks (Laurence Fishburn, slumming it) and scientific officer Nash (THE BOYS’ Tomer Capone, the one actor I felt was actually trying in this snooze fest). The trip involves using a slingshot maneuver with Jupiter’s gravitational pull, and after something strikes the ship, the small crew start to have differing opinions on whether it’s feasible to continue. Then the paranoia and hallucinations start, which certainly won’t affect anyone’s judgment.

The premise, while familiar, had promise. Hoping against hope I would be treated to a fresh take on this type of material, the script continuously persisted in being subpar, at best, actively irritating more often than not. And don’t even get me started on the incessant unnecessary flashback scenes that made me wish I had an alcoholic beverage, if only to make a game out of it. By the time the ending (finally) rolled around, it was too little, too late.

Speaking of the ending, you’ll either love it or be so mad you’ll throw something out of sheer frustration at being toyed with so mercilessly for the better part of two hours. As for myself, I would have admired it if I hadn’t been so annoyed at everything leading up to the climax. All in all, fellow critic Brian Tallerico summed it up far better than I ever could in his Letterboxd review: “In space, no one can hear you yawn.”

2/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Colby Holt and Sam Probst’s GANYMEDE takes the prize for the most triggering thing I’ve seen all year. I mean that as a compliment.

The story follows Lee Fletcher (Jordan Doww), the wrestling star son of an ultra conservative Christian politician (Joe Chrest), as he develops feelings towards an openly gay classmate, Kyle (Pablo Castelblanco). As if being overwhelmed by these new feelings and discovering things about himself wasn’t enough for a teenage boy to deal with, he’s also being tormented by a demonic figure. When Lee and Kyle are discovered in an embrace, Lee’s parents resort to drastic measures suggested to them by their current pastor (David Koechner).

The behaviors depicted in the film will probably feel ridiculous to audiences unfamiliar with a particular type of upbringing, but for this critic, it hit all too close to home. Scenes of Lee desperately praying about his sexuality made the hair raise on the back of my neck thinking about my own adolescence. Now, this being a horror film, things are dialed up to 11, but it still felt real enough that at times I had to remind myself that it was just a movie. My parents certainly never attempted conversion therapy, but for many young people, it’s not out of the realm of possibility. Every time the pastor or Lee’s father opened their mouths and would say some of the most damaging things a teenager struggling with identity could possibly hear, I would think back to similar things I’d heard in churches my whole life, and I felt devastated thinking about the many teenagers who wouldn’t be as lucky as I have been with access to therapy and a good support system, and the lives that would inevitably be lost due to ignorance and hatred from people who are supposed to be teaching love.

The film isn’t perfect, and not every element works, but I had a marvelous experience spending time with these characters - when I wasn’t reliving trauma, that is. Castelblanco’s Kyle is the heart and soul of the film, and along with his loving mother, Kim (Sofia Yepes), provides a much needed respite from the darker moments throughout. The film can also be quite funny, with a stellar supporting cast that I wished had gotten more to do during the brisk runtime.

GANYMEDE is definitely a “your mileage may vary” type of film in that it definitely won’t work for everyone. If you do have a familiarity with the more conservative side of society, this most likely will be right up your proverbial alley. Either way, I definitely recommend this as a better-than-it-needs-to-be low budget queer horror film! I certainly am glad I watched it. And as a cautionary tale against the dangers of conversion therapy (which is still legal in about half of the USA), I dare say it’s even an important film.

3.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Zoë Kravitz’ directorial debut BLINK TWICE is horrifying, hilarious, and one of the most satisfying films you’ll see this year. Female rage has never been so much fun.

The story follows Frida (Naomi Ackie), who, along with her best friend and roommate, Jess (Alia Shawkat), gets invited on a spontaneous island getaway by reformed bad boy billionaire Slater (Channing Tatum) after meeting at an event where they’re waiting tables for the upper crust of society. Being swept off your feet by a gorgeous billionaire is the ultimate dream, but like the adage goes, if something feels too good to be true… The days and nights of gourmet food and partying with the elite blur together, and something starts to feel off. Then Jess disappears. When nobody remembers Jess ever being there in the first place, Frida realizes something is very wrong in this seeming paradise.

The entire cast understands the assignment and play their roles with razor sharp precision. Tatum especially surprised me as I was not expecting him to be able to play insidious and threatening in a way that made my skin crawl. Ackie is a revelation, the layers of emotion she’s asked to portray at any given time with nuance and care are handled with ease, I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. The MVP here, though, is Adria Arjona’s Sarah, another woman on the island. I can’t get into specifics, but oh boy did I love her character. The men we encounter are slimy and perfectly cast as well, Simon Rex’s Cody was especially entertaining throughout.

Kravitz quickly establishes deftness behind the camera, there’s a distinct style here that one usually doesn’t see from a first feature. As much as I think she would have fit perfectly in this world, I couldn’t help but appreciate her decision to not also star, as is often the case with actors turned directors. So many times films in this circumstance end up just feeling like a vanity project, and here you get the distinct impression that Kravitz just wanted to make a good movie with no ulterior motives.

The twists and turns of this tongue-in-cheek indictment of Alpha Male entitlement are best saved for the theater, but even though some beats may feel borrowed from other films, the script, performances, and direction all come together to make something fresh and relevant. If you’ve ever wanted to see Andrew Tate get what’s coming to him, this is the film for you. BLINK TWICE is PRETTY WOMAN meets THE STEPFORD WIVES, and I cannot wait to see it again. Highly recommend.

4.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Italian horror import THE WELL is one of the best surprises I’ve had all year. When I tell you I *screamed* during a particular sequence, I’m not being hyperbolic. The practical effects are that good.

Director and co-writer Federico Zampaglione mixes a gothic-esque dark fairy tale with a gore fest , and it’s glorious. Our story follows Lisa (Terrifier 2’s Lauren LaVera) as she travels to Italy to restore a very important painting for a Duchess (Claudia Gerini) before it is to be sold. Once there, seemingly alone on the estate with the regal aging Duchess and her creepy teenage daughter (Linda Zampaglione), things start to get odd.

The details that unfold aren’t always the most original, but the cast is having so much fun it’s hard to fault. There’s a playfulness here that comes through the screen in a way that you don’t feel often in this world of mega budget high stakes filmmaking. Where the film truly shines, however, is in the practical gore effects we are treated to throughout the perfectly paced runtime. Every time I have the pleasure to see a low budget film with practical effects that outdo many of the slick horror films every year, I get more and more bewildered why it isn’t the standard rather than the exception. There is some stuff in here that any horror lover worth their salt will kick themselves for missing out on!

Lauren LaVera has a captivating screen presence, and Gerini plays European Old Money with perfection. The film wastes no time getting in and getting out, and when the 91 minute runtime was over, I had the biggest smile on my face. What more could you want? Spooky Season is off to a great start.

Coming to streaming September 3

4/5

[claygoestothemovies]

1/2⭐️

THE CROW is easily the worst film I’ve seen all year - and I’ve seen some stinkers.

Rupert Sanders’ reimagining of THE CROW fundamentally misunderstands the source material to a degree that is baffling. It’s soulless, never justifies its existence, and worst of all is incredibly dull. I’m still trying to wrap my head around how something so bad made it to theaters.

This time around, Eric Draven (Bill Skarsgård, in his second flop of the year) and Shelly (FKA Twigs) are no longer deeply in love and preparing to marry before they are brutally dispatched. Now they meet in jail/rehab and go on a drug fueled whirlwind “romance” that is a week long at most before their demise. THE CROW is, at its core, a love story. If you don’t believe the love fueling the events of the story, everything else falls apart. I don’t know what Eric and Shelly are feeling during their short time together, but it definitely isn’t a love that defies death itself. It instead comes across with the same energy as a guy who gets mad that his new girlfriend he picked up at a dive bar keeps in contact with her baby daddy. It’s toxic, and I’m dreading the crossover of audiences who think the Joker and Harley Quinn are romantic goals seeing this and thinking the same thing.

Even if the love story that the plot hinges on wasn’t bad enough to kill the film (it is), every element surrounding it is equally as dreadful. The script is a dumpster fire, the performances uniformly wooden (when Danny Huston isn’t a memorable or threatening villain, you know you’ve got utter trash on your hands), and even worse, you can tell that the film truly thinks it’s being something iconic. There was one (1) sequence at an Opera House that was almost entertaining, but even that was so bizarre in the framework of the story to be nonsensical that I couldn’t even appreciate that. And why are we still using CG blood??? It never looks right!!!

Skarsgård tries his best, but Meryl Streep couldn’t do anything with this material. Twigs doesn’t have the acting experience to bring anything to the character of Shelly, and Huston seems resigned to take the check and hopefully will have a very strong word with his agent. There’s nothing positive I can say about this, other than the “creatives” behind this slop will hopefully never work again. If someone tells you they thought this was a good movie, take them for a brain scan immediately. Stick with the original, some things aren’t meant to come back from the dead.

.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️1/2

Fede Alvarez’s ALIEN: ROMULUS was something I’d been highly anticipating ever since it was announced that he would be helming an entry in the nearly 50 year franchise. What he did with EVIL DEAD was astounding back in 2013, and I couldn’t wait to see what he brought to this project. What we got was disgusting, and not in a good way.

The story takes place in between ALIEN and ALIENS, and follows a group of young people who are living in a harsh mining colony with no sunlight. This being a rough existence, they, understandably, want out. Our de facto main character is Rain (the always reliable Cailee Spaeny), who, along with her android Andy (David Jonsson) agrees to a quick little heist to steal the supplies they need to relocate. This being a horror film, it doesn’t go as planned.

The beats are largely predictable, but still a fun and tense ride. Fede still knows how to stylishly direct horror with ease. One set piece in particular is among the best of the franchise. Unfortunately, the issues the film does contain are glaring enough to overshadow most of the good that is in there.

*If you want to avoid light spoilers, skip to the last paragraph*

My first giant issue is the use of a dead actor as a character in this film out of little more than fan service. Any time this is done in a film, it feels gross. Like a moral violation has occurred. In some instances, you can mostly overlook it if it’s relegated to a cameo or something to that effect. In this instance, it was a relatively large character in the film and I was taken out so many times it was a very frustrating experience. Depending on how you feel about resurrecting dead performers in a film, your mileage may vary.

My second issue has to do with the depiction of the Android character, Andy. David Jonsson is the only Black POC in the film, and I only mention this because of the portrayal of the character. His entire programming is to do whatever is best for Cailee Spaeny’s (white) character. In addition to this uncomfortable relationship dynamic, Andy is also coded mentally handicapped. The overall effect of this feels dangerously close to the out of date and stereotypical portrayal of POC characters being unintelligent and only there to benefit white characters. Seeing Prissy in GONE WITH THE WIND is one thing, seeing a character coded in this way in 2024 feels completely inexcusable.

All in all, while it was beautifully shot and directed with thrilling set pieces, my qualms with the film that I laid out above makes it very hard to recommend this film. If those things don’t bother you, you’ll probably love it. If they are something you can’t get past, definitely skip this entry so the studios know they need to do better.

2.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️

CUCKOO is one of the strangest films I’ve seen all year - and I watched SASQUATCH SUNSET! It’s a pity it was feature length, as it would have made an *excellent* episode of THE X-FILES. As it stands, it left a bit to be desired.

The story follows Gretchen (an electric Hunter Schafer) as she moves to Germany with her father and his wife and daughter after the death of her mother. They’re moving to help build a new resort for the enigmatic Herr König (Dan Stevens, dropping in for the third time this year with a bizarre and hilarious performance and accent). He offers Gretchen a job working in the lobby and is *very* concerned that she is not there at night. He’s right. This area is not a place you want to find yourself after dark. And why are all these women throwing up everywhere?! After a couple violent incidents, Gretchen is determined to find out the truth of what’s happening, so when a local police officer (Márton Csókás) approaches her for help, she is more than happy to get in on the investigation.

The secret of what is happening is both disturbing and highly silly, and the film itself is at least 15 minutes too long. This is one of those films that your mileage will definitely vary. As for myself, all the elements didn’t entirely work. The script and finished product definitely could have used another pass in the edit, but the creepy bits were mostly effective, and Stevens and Schafer are worth the price of admission alone.

The thing I appreciated the most about the film was that there wasn’t a single mention of Hunter Schafer’s character being trans. She just got to be a trans actress playing a teenage girl. I found it very refreshing to see stories heading in that direction, without making it a statement about trans trauma. Gretchen is just a girl. Bravo, CUCKOO!

3/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

TRAP is the most fun I’ve had with a M. Night Shyamalan film in almost a decade. It’s silly, outrageous, and a killer good time. The fact that it stars Josh Hartnett has absolutely nothing to do with my enjoyment, I’m sure!

The film follows Cooper (Hartnett) and his daughter Riley (Ariel Donoghue) as they attend a Lady Raven (Saleka Shyamalan) concert filled with 30,000 exuberant fans. There also is a substantial police presence - Taylor Swift doesn’t have this kind of security at the Eras Tour! We quickly find out that Cooper isn’t just the lovable hot dad he’s presenting to the world, he’s a serial killer, and a vicious one. Now he’s got to outthink the cops and a brilliant profiler (Hayley Mills, a long way from THE PARENT TRAP) before he’s discovered. To say anything more would be a disservice to Shyamalan, the film, and to you. All I will say is that if you thought the marketing spoiled everything, it didn’t.

Hartnett is delicious in this role, and not just because of his looks. When an actor gets to play against type, it’s always exciting to witness, and this is no exception. Allison Pill also makes a memorable appearance as Hartnett’s mousy wife, Rachel. The standout here, however, is Shyamalan’s daughter Saleka as Lady Raven. Nepo Baby or not, I couldn’t take my eyes off of her when she was onscreen! She portrayed the confidence and loneliness of a pop star with precision, and I really hope we start seeing her in more things after this.

The mind games on display through this increasingly ludicrous plot are never less than smile inducing. It’s just so damn fun! All I know is that if Taylor Swift wanted to make real change in the world, she definitely has the power and should maybe take a few lessons from Lady Raven. Definitely see this on the big screen, and stick around for a mid credit scene that will make you giddy.

3.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

DEADPOOL & WOLVERINE was always going to do well. Audiences were curious to see how the character would be handled after Disney took over Fox, Hugh Jackman’s return as Wolverine, Wolverine and Deadpool together onscreen, there’s no way this wouldn’t work, right? Thankfully, in spite of an overly confusing and muddled story, the nostalgia heavy jokes *mostly* land. If you’re a Millennial.

After the death of Wolverine in LOGAN, the organization introduced in LOKI that is in charge of the timelines is going to let Deadpool’s universe fall into nothingness because Wolverine was the anchor being holding it all together. Or something like that. Anyway, Wade Wilson is determined to save his ragtag group of friends so his mission is easy - find a Wolverine from another timeline!

The storyline and plot beats are really just set dressing for Ryan Reynolds and company to do their thing. Namely, make jokes about pop culture that will only be funny to the terminally online of a certain age. My personal favorites were digs at Hugh Jackman about his divorce and his musical theater history. The jokes don’t all land, it’s a very kitchen sink approach as you’d expect from a film with a plethora of credited screenwriters, but the ratio of good jokes to clunkers is definitely worth the price of admission.

The thing I loved most about this entry in the MCU was the actors and characters from the past that I never expected to see onscreen again. I’m surprised I didn’t break my movie date’s arm when a particular one appeared, I was that excited! The new characters introduced, however, I found largely lackluster. Emma Corrin’s villainous Cassandra falls as flat as the CGI.

All in all, there are more positives than negatives to be found. The needle drops are perfect, for instance. Overall, it’s a very joyful experience! Hopefully they let poor Hugh retire the claws for real now so he can just sing and dance like he’s always wanted.

3.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️1/2

I certainly would not have expected Lee Isaac Chung’s follow up to MINARI to be a reimagining of TWISTER, but here we are. Unfortunately, TWISTERS is a mostly hollow experience with none of the heart or excitement of the original. That said, Glen Powell continues his career trademark of being the most fun part in any project he’s involved in.

We meet Kate (Daisy Edgar-Jones) in an action packed and terrifying opening (that the rest of the film never comes close to reaching) as she is testing out her theory on how to destroy a tornado, with devastating results. The rest of the story proper takes place a few years later, with her being the reluctant expert dragged back into a life she’s been running from by her old friend Javi (Anthony Ramos). Glen Powell on the other hand is an obnoxious YouTuber who chases storms and sells tees with his face on them and says things like, “If you feel it, chase it!” The script seems to think they have romantic tension, the actual chemistry between the actors leads me to disagree. I had more of a connection with the Nutella I had at lunchtime. In today’s sexless film landscape, perhaps that was by design.

In a film called TWISTERS, I’ll hazard a guess that most audiences don’t care about the depth of the story and are more interested in the storm centric set pieces. The scale is appropriate, although when you don’t really care about the characters involved, it’s hard to be invested in what’s going to potentially happen to them. I am curious about the number of drunk people who will attempt to set off fireworks into tornadoes after this film, though, it seems very tempting.

The most egregious sin this film commits, however, is a combo of truly eye roll inducing dialogue hand-in-hand with the most on-the-nose needle drops ever committed to the art form. Just in case you weren’t sure what a paper thin character was feeling at any given point in the runtime, there’s a song to tell you that information. It felt lazy at first, rolled around to funny, and by the end it was just irritating at how little the entire thing seemed to think of its audience’s mental capabilities.

In the end, it’s just another mindless summer blockbuster. No more, no less. And it gave at least two safety tips about what to do in case of a tornado spawning nearby, which could save a life one day, I suppose. So there’s that.

2.5/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Damien Mc Carthy’s second feature ODDITY is the first film to genuinely scare me this year. You know when they film audiences to get their reactions? I’m glad they weren’t in that screening, or I’d be pretty embarrassed. After CAVEAT scared me out of my wits, I should have been prepared.

After an opening sequence that would have had Hitchcock clapping, we follow Darcy (Carolyn Bracken), a blind psychic mourning the loss of her twin sister Dani (also Bracken) a year earlier. It’s always the one year anniversary in horror films, so it seems fitting. She goes to visit her psychiatrist brother-in-law Ted (Gwilym Lee) and his new girlfriend Yana (Caroline Menton) at the remote house where the violent murder happened, to try and achieve some closure from the dreadful events. She isn’t visiting alone, however. She brings a delightful gift in the form of the most horrifying wooden mannequin imaginable. The significance of this we won’t find out until later, but its unnerving presence looms throughout, always lingering in the back of your mind where it connects to the hairs on your neck.

To say that things are very wrong in that house is an understatement. This is a world where disbelief can get you killed. Horribly. Jump scares can be a cheap way to make your audience think they’ve been frightened, but when earned, and wielded effectively as they are here, well, you might want to make sure you visit the restroom before it starts. One especially made me levitate about ten inches above my chair, I’m certain.

None of this would work without the stellar performances of the leads. While some of the individual story beats may feel predictable to the more discerning viewer, you’ll doubtfully care because you’re having such a delicious time watching these actors. Bracken is the standout, getting to play two characters, and one of them is blind and *eccentric* to say the least. I also really enjoyed Caroline Menton’s pitch perfect portrayal of the new girlfriend, Yana. There is a scene of the two of them at a dinner table that crackled with so much tension at one point I was wondering, “if someone gets slapped, will I feel it, too?”

I did find the story itself ever-so-slightly on the clunky side, but with the raw talent and zeal for the craft behind the camera, I’m willing to forgive it a bit as McDonald’s Carthy further hones his skills. No sophomore slump here, that’s for sure! I’m not sure how I feel about the final shot, but I think I like it, even if it is a bit of a silly note to end on. Maybe that’s what we need after a story like this though. Definitely see it on the big screen, at night. Then add this to your Spooky Season rotation.

4/5

[claygoestothemovies]

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Greg Berlanti’s FLY ME TO THE MOON had my theater cackling, myself included. Unfortunately, the rom part of this rom-com crashes on take off. Thankfully, this screenwriter (Rose Gilroy, based on a story by Keenan Flynn and Bill Kirstein) at least appears to know how a cat acts in real life, unlike another recent film.

The razor sharp caper follows Kelly Jones (Scarlett Johansson playing Don Draper if he was fast on his feet and had a sense of humor), a marketing genius who’s “encouraged” by a man working for Nixon (Woody Harrelson) to take on a job in Florida. What will she be marketing? Why, the moon, of course! America is deep in the Space Race, and NASA needs a social facelift if it’s any chance of succeeding. On the more technical side of making Apollo 11 happen is launch director Cole Davis (Channing Tatum), and the last thing he needs is a smart and attractive woman making distractions, or something like that.

The big hook of the film is that in order to ensure that the moon landing goes off without a hitch to the American People and the world, they have to take measures to fake it. The comedy of all of this is hysterical. I haven’t laughed so much at a con since DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS. The jokes consistently land, and make fantastic use of Tricky Dick being in office. Scarlett Johansson is at the top of her game here, more films should let her be funny! Give us a ScarJo/Rachel McAdams buddy comedy, someone! Rose Byrne can come, too! Tatum is fine, and he handles the comedic elements satisfactorily. Harrelson and the rest of the supporting cast seem to be having a marvelous time, especially Jim Rash as the high strung director brought in to make the top secret film. Ray Romano also gives a warm turn as Henry Smalls, a fatherly figure working at NASA. A delightful black kitty is also featured. What a year for cats in cinema!

If this had just been a comedy, I would mostly give it top marks. Although I would definitely deduct points for that inexcusable runtime, no comedy - romantic or otherwise - needs to be 132 minutes long. But it’s not just a comedy. It’s a romantic comedy, and in that department, it somehow fails entirely. Everything about the romance, except for maybe the meet cute, feels so utterly forced I never bought in for a second. It’s the Sixties, I should be feeling Doris Day and Rock Hudson levels of sexual tension between these actors! Johansson could have chemistry with a napkin, yet Tatum seems like he could be her character’s brother; romantic sparks are not the vibe they give while sparring.

While overlong, and that could have been fixed by Nix(on)ing (sorry) the romantic plot, and my issues with the romantic aspects aside, I still had a great time with this one! I laughed a lot of that runtime, enjoyed some possibly revisionist history, and got to see ScarJo rocking period costumes and hair while making all the men around her look dumb. It’s not rocket science, but as far as popcorn entertainment goes, you could do a lot worse.

3.5/5