cowboylikemac

[cowboylikemac]

THEME???????? 😻😻😻😻😻

YESSSS

[cowboylikemac]

the way everyone is coming at Sabrina is lowkey giving the summer of 2020 all over again. People feel powerless about the state of the world and latch on to small things online and create a huge discourse.

1. that “lolita” reference that everyone is talking about was in a magazine issued last year and no one had a problem with it then (she apologized after the shoot saying she wasn’t trying to reference it and if it’s anyone’s fault it’s the issuers), people are only bringing this up now because people are hungry to cancel someone new. obviously the lolita shoot was wrong but it was for a magazine where she had no creative direction. In reference to the sprinkle picture everyone keeps throwing around: The photographer is Zoë Ghertner and she’s very into nature, water, warmth, and what she describes as ‘goey’ aesthetics. None of the other pictures she took of Sabrina in that shoot have any resemblance to anything from ‘Lolita’. According to W Mag, it was the last picture of the shoot because it was very hot out and it would ruin her makeup and hair. And many of Zoë’s other shoots depict models in wet conditions, tights, covered in organic elements like sand, showing off the body in some ways. I sincerely doubt Zoë, Sabrina, or W Mag wanted her to mimic ‘Lolita’. If after this information you still want to believe the internet theory, go right ahead.

2. Everyone is talking about Sabrina’s cover like have you seen some of these male rapper’s album covers? one for example is partynextdoor this just shows that if it was a man’s album cover no one would be freaking out like this.

3. the album is literally called man’s best friend and features a man treating a woman like a dog. the lead single is manchild. how are people missing that it’s clearly satire? she’s mocking the way women are dehumanized under the male gaze. it’s not that deep unless you don’t get it, then it kinda is.

4. people making this political or thinking it’s political are just wrong. Sabrina’s not suddenly being political, she’s being intentional. the album isn’t about policy or activism, it’s social commentary. it’s satire. she’s playing with the male gaze, gender roles, and how women are seen, using irony to make a point. that’s not politics, that’s art.

[cowboylikemac]

bf taylor take me away

[cowboylikemac]

should i come back…

[cowboylikemac]

. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　

Me on my wedding day when my husband is not Fred Weasley...

. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　. ݁₊᪥⋆. ݁　

[cowboylikemac]

the giver has actually been on REPEAT

[cowboylikemac]

BLANK SPACE | H.P

“ screaming crying perfect storm .”

harry potter x fem!reader

includes: fluff, angst

The first time Harry kissed you, it was a mistake.

Or at least, it was supposed to be.

The Gryffindor common room was too hot, too loud, thick with the aftershock of a Quidditch victory. Someone had pushed a glass of firewhisky into his hand, someone else had dared him to do something reckless, and before he could think too hard about it—

There you were.

Watching. Waiting.

It had been your voice that cut through the haze, amused and sharp. “What’s wrong, Potter? Scared?”

And Harry had been drunk on adrenaline, on victory, on the unbearable temptation of you.

So he kissed you.

Hard, fast, reckless.

It was supposed to be a joke, something to laugh about later.

But then you kissed him back, fingers curling into his collar, pulling him closer.

And just like that, the game began.

The next time it happened, there was no excuse.

No party, no dare, no convenient push into something careless.

Just you and him, alone in a shadowed corridor after curfew, whispering insults that sounded too much like foreplay.

“You think you’ve got me figured out, don’t you?” you mused, tilting your head, eyes gleaming in the dim light.

Harry swallowed, jaw tight. “I don’t think I want to.”

And just like that, you kissed him first this time.

Because Harry Potter never backed down from a challenge.

And neither did you.

Loving you was like holding fire.

You burned bright, fast, all-consuming.

Harry found himself looking for you when he shouldn’t. He told himself it was just curiosity. Just habit.

Then why did it feel like something else?

Why did he feel like he was losing every time you walked away?

Because the truth was, it wasn’t just about sneaking around anymore.

It was the way you knew him too well.

The way you saw past the Boy Who Lived, past the Golden Boy, straight into the part of him that ached to be understood.

The way he let you in before he realized he had.

And that was the problem.

Because Harry Potter wasn’t supposed to fall for people like you.

People who were dangerous, sharp, ambitious, untouchable.

People who made love feel like a battlefield.

But he had. God help him, he had.

It was fun, until it wasn’t.

“You’re doing this on purpose.”

You didn’t even bother looking up from your book. “What?”

Harry stood stiffly in front of you, arms crossed, looking at you like he wanted to shake you. “McLaggen.”

Now you looked up, unimpressed. “And?”

Harry’s jaw clenched. “You’re playing games.”

You smiled then, slow and sharp. “That’s the fun part, isn’t it?”

His fingers curled into fists. “Not when I don’t know what’s real.”

Your heart stumbled. Just for a second.

Then you exhaled, feigning indifference. “What does it matter, Potter? You’ll get bored eventually.”

He took a step closer, voice low, dangerous. “Is that what you think?”

You shrugged. “Isn’t that what always happens?”

Something in his expression cracked. And for the first time, you saw it.

The hurt. The anger. The way he had let himself believe, even for a moment, that you were something real.

You had been winning—until you realized it never should have been a game in the first place.

The final fight was the worst one.

“I can’t do this anymore.”

You let out a quiet, hollow laugh. “That’s what you said last time.”

Harry shook his head, pacing, hands in his hair like he was trying to keep himself together. “Yeah, well. I meant it this time.”

You forced your voice to stay light, unaffected. “Alright, then. See you around, Potter.”

His head snapped up. “That’s it?”

You shrugged. “What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know,” he admitted, frustrated. “I don’t know what I expected.”

You smiled then, slow and lovely and cruel. “That’s your problem, isn’t it? You always expect too much.”

And maybe—just maybe—you said it because you wanted him to prove you wrong.

But he didn’t.

He just exhaled sharply, turned on his heel, and walked away.

And for the first time, you let him.

The war hadn’t started yet.

But it was coming.

And Harry still looked for you.

He told himself he was done. That he didn’t need the chaos, the push-and-pull, the mess of it all.

But then he walked into the Great Hall, and your eyes met across the room, and suddenly—nothing had changed.

He still wanted you.

And maybe, just maybe, you still wanted him too.

The difference this time?

You weren’t going to run.

So you found him first, slipping into the Gryffindor common room like you belonged there.

Harry was by the fire, looking up as soon as you stepped inside.

He let out a breath of disbelief. “What are you doing here?”

You hesitated. Then, softer, honest for once—

“Starting over.”

Something shifted in his expression.

You took a breath, steadier now. More real.

“I’m a nightmare,” you said, lips quirking, a little self-deprecating now. “You said it yourself.”

Harry exhaled, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, well.” He glanced at you, something softer in his gaze now. “I think I like nightmares.”

Your chest tightened, something warm creeping in beneath the mess of it all.

You leaned in, close enough that he could feel your breath against his skin.

“Then let’s make a new game, Potter,” you murmured.

Harry smirked, shaking his head, but his hand found yours anyway.

And this time—neither of you let go.

masterlist!

a/n: remember my inbox is always open for suggestions

tags: @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine

[cowboylikemac]

sorry that I haven’t uploaded in so long, I have been busy with projects but I will post this week <3

[cowboylikemac]

I’m so jelly of ur theme it’s so cutesy omg

omg i feel special tysm <33

[cowboylikemac]

okay but let's talk about zeus reader x percy?? (also may be biased)

-anon ⚡

THIS WHAT YOU CAME FOR | P.J

very small blurb but I’m going to name it bc I actually love it

Percy had kissed you a hundred times before—soft, slow, playful, teasing—but never quite like this.

The two of you had snuck away from camp, finding refuge in a quiet spot near the lake, the summer air warm and thick with tension. The sun was setting, casting everything in a golden glow, and Percy had been giving you that look—the one that made your stomach flip.

And then, he kissed you.

It started soft, his hands cupping your face, his lips brushing against yours with lazy affection. But it didn’t stay soft for long. Percy deepened the kiss, pulling you closer, his fingers trailing down your arms, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

And that’s when it happened.

A sharp zap cracked between you, a sudden jolt of static that surged from your skin straight into his.

“OW—SHIT!” Percy yelped, jerking back, eyes wide.

Your heart dropped. “Oh gods—Percy, I didn’t mean to!”

He was rubbing his bottom lip, looking somewhere between stunned and amused. “Did you just electrocute me?”

Your face went hot. “It was an accident!”

Percy blinked, then suddenly grinned. “That’s kinda cool.”

You groaned, covering your face with your hands. “No, it’s not! I just shocked my boyfriend mid-makeout session!”

“It’s a little cool,” he teased, tilting his head. “I mean, it’s not every day you literally get a spark when you kiss someone.”

You peeked through your fingers, still embarrassed. “You’re impossible.”

Percy smirked, stepping closer. “Come on, let’s try again. Maybe I’ll get superpowers.”

You rolled your eyes but let him pull you back in, heart racing as his lips hovered just above yours.

“You ready?” he murmured, and before you could answer, he kissed you again—slow, deliberate, and utterly unbothered by the risk of another shock.

And this time, when your hands tangled in his hair, you focused on keeping the electricity at bay.

Mostly.

(Okay, maybe he got a tiny shock, but judging by the way he kissed you harder, he didn’t mind.)

masterlist !

tags: @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine

[cowboylikemac]

very small blurb because I love being in cabin seven !

you sat by the water with your feet curled beneath you as your head rested on your knees. You watched as the sun danced on the water.

You heard the soft squeaks of the sand as someone walked behind you. You turned your head seeing your boyfriend Percy walking over to you.

You smiled as he greeted you “Hey sunshine.” He said softly sitting down right next to you placing a soft kiss on your head as he did.

“Hey.” You greeted softly giving him a small smile before turning back to the water.

A calm silence fell over the two of you, it felt perfect. You and Percy never needed to communicate all the time, that is what was nice to be with him. It could be painfully quiet and neither of you would have to overthink anything.

“Y’know—“ he spoke up “It’s almost like the water and the sun belong together.” He stated softly turning to look at you.

You felt yourself smile as he said those words.

“Guess it’s a good thing I’m cabin seven then.” You said watching his grin winden

“Guess it is.” He said softly before kissing the side of your jaw.

masterlist !

tags: @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine

[cowboylikemac]

this might be biased but apollo reader x percy is the cutest shit ever

[cowboylikemac]

my mind turns your life…

˚ ⊹ ˚ — — 𝓜ac’s 𝓟ub

on the record player : taylor swift , harry styles , chappell roan , gracie abrams , billie ellish , charli xcx , olivia rodrigo , conan gray , & tate mcrae

in the library : shatter me !

in the cassette player : RW&RB , harry potter , greys anatomy , criminal minds , pjo , & the office

on the typewriter : masterlist !

— my inbox is open for recs and convos ! ִ ࣪𖤐.ᐟ 💋

into folklore ! ੭* ‧₊°

[cowboylikemac]

LOVE NOTES | J.P

“ love’s a game, wanna play? ”

james potter x reader

including : fluff

word count : 1k+

Valentine’s Day at Hogwarts had always been an over-the-top affair. Professor Flitwick charmed pink and red paper hearts to float lazily through the corridors, Madam Pince enforced an even stricter no public displays of affection in the library rule (which never stopped couples from sneaking into the Restricted Section), and Peeves delighted in dropping flower petals—or sometimes actual ink—onto unsuspecting students’ heads.

It was ridiculous. Excessive. Completely overdone.

And yet, it had never mattered much to you—until now.

Because for the first time in your life, you had a secret admirer.

The first note had appeared in your Potions textbook, folded so neatly it was clear whoever had left it had taken great care. The parchment was slightly crinkled, as if it had been held too tightly before finally being placed inside.

“A smile like yours could rival the sun—lucky for us, you don’t burn as bright, or I’d be blinded every time you walked by.”

At first, you assumed it was some sort of prank. Maybe Sirius Black was up to his usual nonsense, or perhaps some lovesick Hufflepuff had gotten the courage to anonymously express their feelings. Either way, you dismissed it as a fluke.

Until the second note arrived.

This one was slipped into your robe pocket between Transfiguration and Charms, folded once with the same careful handwriting:

“If kindness had a sound, I think it would be your laugh.”

The third note came the following morning, waiting for you at breakfast beside your goblet of pumpkin juice:

“I swear the library is quieter when you aren’t there. Even the books miss you.”

By the fourth note, which had been tucked into your favorite quill case, you were officially flustered.

Who in Merlin’s name was doing this?

Who was noticing these small things about you?

And, more importantly… why did it make your heart pound so much?

The answer, of course, came in the form of one James Potter—who, much to your amusement, was not handling the situation well.

“What do you mean someone is leaving you notes?” James demanded, sitting across from you in the Gryffindor common room, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. His hazel eyes, usually filled with mischief, were narrowed in something suspiciously close to jealousy.

You raised an eyebrow, casually twirling the most recent note between your fingers. “I mean exactly that, James. Someone’s been leaving me love notes.”

James’s scowl deepened. “But who?”

You resisted the urge to laugh. “If I knew that, they wouldn’t be a secret admirer, would they?”

Sirius, who had been lounging beside James, smirked in amusement, clearly enjoying his best mate’s unraveling. “Merlin, Prongs, you sound jealous.”

James scoffed, waving a hand in frustration. “I’m not jealous—I’m concerned, love.” He gestured wildly. “What if it’s some creep? Some bloke with terrible intentions?”

You shot him a look. “James. Someone who writes poetry about my laugh doesn’t exactly scream dangerous.”

James ran a hand through his messy hair, looking properly exasperated. “I just don’t like the idea of you getting all these notes from some anonymous git who can’t even sign his name.”

Sirius snorted. “Big words coming from the bloke who’s been carrying his love letter around for two weeks without delivering it.”

James immediately stiffened.

You blinked.

“What?” you asked slowly, turning to James.

James spluttered, his face immediately turning scarlet. “I—I don’t know what he’s talking about.”

Sirius threw his head back, absolutely delighted at the turn of events. “Oh, come off it, Prongs! You’re the worst secret admirer in history.”

You stared at James, your heart hammering in your chest. “Wait.” You sat up straighter, gripping the note between your fingers. “You wrote these?”

James didn’t respond right away. Instead, he let out a quiet groan, dropping his head into his hands. When he finally spoke, his voice was muffled. “Maybe?”

Sirius was howling with laughter now. “Oh, this is bloody fantastic! You’ve been ‘jealous’ of yourself this whole time!”

James groaned again, refusing to lift his head. “I hate everything.”

You, meanwhile, were trying very hard not to laugh.

“James,” you said, reaching out to gently pry his hands away from his face. He peeked up at you through his fingers, looking so embarrassed that it was almost endearing.

You squeezed his hand. “You’re an idiot.”

James exhaled sharply, finally meeting your gaze. “I know.”

“But,” you continued, a small smile tugging at your lips, “you’re a very sweet idiot.”

James perked up ever so slightly. “Sweet enough for a Valentine’s date, pretty girl?”

You hummed, pretending to consider it. “Hmm. Maybe.”

James straightened. “Maybe?”

You grinned, enjoying the way his face lit up. “I might be more convinced if you write me one more love note.”

James groaned dramatically, though there was no hiding the dopey, lovesick smile spreading across his face.

And when Valentine’s Day finally arrived, a final note appeared on your bedside table, written on slightly crumpled parchment in familiar, loopy handwriting:

“I may have been late to the game, but if you’ll let me, I’d love to be the only one writing you love notes from now on.”

And something told you that he would be.

happy valentines day from yours truly, mac <3

masterlist!

tags: @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine

[cowboylikemac]

Please please please write part 2 for QUESTION…? in which Sirius and reader get back together after more angst 🥺

QUESTION…? PT.2 | S.B

sirius black x reader

Including : post-break up , angst

word count : 1k+

The night was quiet, save for the wind threading through the stone towers. The sky stretched endless and dark above you, the stars burning cold and far away.

Sirius stood at the edge of the Astronomy Tower, his back to you, hands braced against the stone railing. He must have heard you approach, but he didn’t turn.

Still, he knew it was you.

He always did.

You took a slow breath. “I didn’t come here to fight.”

A beat of silence. Then—

“Good.” His voice was quiet, rough at the edges. “I don’t think I could do that again.”

You stepped closer, your fingers ghosting over the cold stone. “Then why do we keep pretending this is easy?”

Sirius let out a slow exhale, still not looking at you. “Because if we don’t, we have to admit that it never really ended.”

Your chest tightened. Because that was the thing, wasn’t it? You had spent weeks trying to move forward, convincing yourself that what you had with him was in the past.

But then he looked at you like this—like the world hadn’t shifted at all—and suddenly, you weren’t sure if you had ever let him go.

“Sirius,” you said, softer now.

His fingers curled against the railing, like he was steadying himself.

“I need to know,” you murmured. “Did you walk away because you wanted to? Or because you thought you had to? Do you…wish you put up more of a fight?”

He swallowed, the movement sharp in the quiet. Then, finally—finally—he turned to face you.

His expression was unreadable, but his eyes—those storm-grey eyes—were tired. Worn from the weight of something unsaid.

“I left,” he said slowly, voice quieter now, “because I thought I was doing the right thing.”

You studied him. “And now?”

His throat bobbed.

“And now I think it was the worst decision I ever made.”

Your breath caught.

Sirius exhaled, raking a hand through his hair, like he didn’t know how to put it into words. “I was afraid,” he admitted. “Of how much I needed you. Of how easy it was to let you in. And I—I told myself that if I let it go, it would be better for both of us.”

Your stomach twisted. “And was it?”

His jaw clenched.

“No.” His voice was barely above a whisper. “It wasn’t.”

The wind carried the silence between you. The kind of silence that didn’t demand to be filled, only felt.

You searched his face. “Do you still love me?”

Sirius exhaled sharply. Like he had been holding his breath this whole time.

“Yes,” he said simply. “I never stopped.”

The truth of it hung between you, solid and undeniable.

Your fingers twitched at your sides. “Then stop looking at me like I’m something you’re afraid of losing.”

His gaze flickered, something raw passing over his features.

“I am afraid,” he admitted. “But if I’m going to lose you, I don’t want it to be because I was too much of a coward to stay.”

Your heart stumbled.

Sirius took a slow step forward, closing the last bit of space between you. His hands hovered at your waist, uncertain.

“I can’t promise I won’t mess up,” he said, voice low, steady. “But I can promise I won’t walk away again.”

You held his gaze, searching for any hesitation. You found none.

So you let yourself believe him.

Your hands slid up, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt, and Sirius exhaled shakily before finally, finally closing the space between you.

The kiss was nothing like the first one. It wasn’t rushed or desperate—it was certain. Like the answer to a question you had both been too afraid to ask.

His hands splayed against your back, pulling you closer, and you let him. Because maybe this time, holding on was enough.

Maybe this time, neither of you had to let go.

masterlist !

a/n: remember my inbox is always open for suggestions!

tags: @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine

[cowboylikemac]

SURF LESSONS | P.J

“ Lost in your current like a priceless wine .”

a/n : I had a sleepover with one of my friends last night and im tired but i wanted to post sooo here is a little blurb! <3

words : 245

Including : fluff

“You owe me, Jackson.”

Percy blinked, all mock innocence. “For what?”

You crossed your arms, glaring at the boy in front of you. “For nearly drowning me!”

“Okay, first of all, that was an accident,” he said, holding up his hands. “Second, you said you wanted to learn how to surf.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t sign up for the Poseidon Special—which, by the way, included exactly zero helpful tips and a whole lot of me getting smacked in the face by a wave!”

Percy grinned, infuriatingly unbothered. “You looked cute flailing around, though.”

You shoved his shoulder. “Not funny.”

“Come on, admit it—you had fun.” He took a step closer, and suddenly, your frustration didn’t seem as important as the way his sea-green eyes were locked onto yours, mischief giving way to something softer.

You swallowed. “You’re still on thin ice.”

He smirked. “Good thing I can swim.”

Before you could think of a snarky comeback, Percy leaned in and kissed you, the taste of salt and summer lingering between you. His lips were warm despite the ocean breeze, and the way his hand found your waist made your heart race.

When he finally pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours, grinning. “Am I forgiven?”

You pretended to think about it, though your face was already burning. “…Fine. But next time, actual surfing lessons.”

“No promises.” And with another quick kiss, he took off running before you could shove him into the water again.

masterlist !

tags : @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine

[cowboylikemac]

QUESTION…? | S.B

“ have you ever kiss somebody in a crowded room ?”

sirius black x reader

Including : post-break up , angst

word count : 1K+

The Gryffindor common room was too warm, too crowded, too familiar.

You had been avoiding places like this—the places that made it too easy to remember. But tonight, Lily had insisted, and you were tired of making excuses.

So here you were, tucked into the corner of the couch, pretending not to notice him.

Sirius was across the room, slouched in an armchair, laughing at something James had said. He looked as he always did—relaxed, effortlessly charming, untouched by the fact that the two of you weren’t speaking anymore.

You, on the other hand, were still figuring out how to breathe normally in the same room as him.

“Are you okay?” Lily murmured beside you, voice low enough that only you could hear.

You forced a small smile. “Yeah.”

She gave you a look. The kind that said she knew you were full of shit but wouldn’t press.

Marlene leaned over the back of the couch, interrupting. “Alright, I have a question,” she announced, grinning. “What’s the worst kiss you’ve ever had?”

A round of groans and laughter rippled through the group. James made a dramatic retching sound. Mary Macdonald pretended to gag.

Someone threw a pillow.

“Terrible question,” Remus muttered, shaking his head. “Why would you want to relive that trauma?”

Marlene ignored him, turning to Lily first.

Lily considered for a moment. “Fifth year. Hogsmeade. Some Ravenclaw who thought snogging meant suffocation.”

Marlene winced. “Oh, brutal.”

They went around the group, each story worse than the last. You were half-listening, nodding along, until Marlene suddenly turned to you.

“Alright, your turn.”

Your stomach twisted.

You should have laughed, brushed it off, said something forgettable about some boy you barely cared about.

But instead—without thinking—you glanced at him.

And he was already looking at you.

The room felt too small, too loud, too much.

Sirius’s expression was unreadable, but his fingers had stilled where they had been absentmindedly spinning his ring. A tell. One you used to know well.

Your throat felt tight.

“Pass,” you murmured, looking away.

Marlene groaned, but the game moved on.

You were done participating, but Sirius’s gaze still felt heavy on your skin.

You told yourself not to look.

You failed.

He was still watching you, something unreadable flickering in his storm-grey eyes.

It wasn’t fair. That he got to look at you like that, like he still had the right.

Like he wasn’t the one who had walked away.

You stood abruptly. “I need air.”

You didn’t wait for a response, slipping out of the common room before anyone could ask questions.

The corridor was quiet, the cold stone walls grounding. You pressed your hands to them, inhaling deep, steadying breaths.

But of course he followed you.

You heard him before you saw him—the soft click of the door, the familiar way his boots scuffed against the floor.

You didn’t turn.

He stopped a few feet away. “Are you going to keep running from me forever?”

His voice was quieter than you expected. Like he didn’t want to startle you.

You let out a breath, your fingers tightening against the stone. “I’m not running.”

He hummed, unconvinced. “Right.”

Silence stretched between you. The air between you was thick, heavy with everything left unsaid.

Sirius sighed. “Why did you look at me?”

Your stomach twisted.

You shook your head, your voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t know.”

But you did.

Because it had never been bad with him. Not once. Not even in the beginning, when you were just friends who flirted too much. Not even when you were in too deep to deny it anymore.

Not even now, when it was over.

“I have a question,” you said softly, staring at the stone floor.

Sirius inhaled. “Okay.”

You swallowed. “Did you ever kiss me in a crowded room just to make everyone second-guess themselves?”

A pause.

His voice was quieter when he answered. “Yeah.”

The memory was still sharp, even now. The way he had kissed you that night at the Three Broomsticks—not because he had to, not because anyone dared him to, but because he wanted to. Because he couldn’t stand the space between you any longer.

You still remembered the way people had looked at you after. Like they had just realized what had been in front of them all along.

You took a shaky breath. “Do you remember ever whispering secrets to me in the dark?”

Sirius let out a quiet, hollow laugh. “Yeah.”

All those nights curled up on the couch in the common room, sharing secrets no one else knew. His childhood, his family, his fears. How he had told you—one night, half-asleep and unguarded—that you made him feel safe.

Your throat tightened.

“Did you ever leave me just because you thought you could?”

This time, the silence was loud.

Sirius exhaled slowly, like he was bracing himself.

His voice was hoarse when he finally spoke. “I didn’t leave because I wanted to.”

You turned then, finally meeting his gaze. “Then why?”

His jaw worked. His hand flexed at his side.

Then, quietly—almost hesitant—he said, “Because it scared me.”

Your breath caught.

Sirius swallowed, his fingers running through his hair, like he didn’t know what to do with himself.

“I’ve never had something like that before. Something real. And I—I thought I’d ruin it. Ruin you.”

Your heart ached.

You shook your head. “You didn’t ruin me, Sirius. You just hurt me.”

Something flickered across his face. Regret.

He took a step closer, slow, careful. “Do you think—” He stopped. Swallowed. Tried again. “Do you think we could ever go back?”

You let out a slow, shaky breath.

“I don’t know.”

Sirius nodded, exhaling through his nose. Accepting it.

But then, softer—more hopeful—he said, “Can I ask you a question?”

You hesitated. Then, “Yeah.”

He took another step closer, close enough to touch.

“Did you ever love me?”

Your breath hitched.

Because of course you had. You still did.

But you weren’t sure you could survive another heartbreak like that.

So you just whispered, “Yeah.”

And then, before you could change your mind or overthink what you just admitted— or before he could pull you back in—you turned and walked away.

masterlist !

tags : @lydiascabinsix @lydiasfalling @laufeysvalentine