cryinggarbagebag

[cryinggarbagebag]

I saw a tik tok edit that reminded me of my absolute rage at Endgame and Steve leaving specifically because I genuinely feel that Marvel writers/the Russos read way too far into their own line here. So here, now you get some analysis cus I'm worked up.

"I had a date" is, IMO, a fantastic summary of Steve's state of mind at this moment. A feeling not just of missing something, but of missing OUT on something. He wakes up in New York City, somewhere that should be familiar, but he's missed decades of history. Home is unrecognizable. The war- a war that gave him his entire purpose- is over. He could have lived to see that if he hadn't gone into the ice. He could have seen peace, had a life, gone on a date. But now he can't, and he's left with this feeling of missing out that will never EVER go away. He's not mourning Peggy specifically- he's mourning a life he never got to have and a life he will never GET to have.

But the thing about Marvel is that sometimes they take a short, quippy, impactful line and they'll beat it to death for the sake of making it relevant again. An example that comes to mind: Budapest. Mentioned in Avengers by Natasha, "Budapest" is meant to serve partially as a joke (Marvel truly loves their little one-liners, especially in the early days), but also partially as an indicator of Clint and Natasha's relationship. It's a reference that only they understand, one that shows their long history, but the ambiguity is what makes it interesting. We, as an audience, ask; what happened in Budapest? And the imagination is the greatest tool here! We imagine an entire life that Clint and Nat lived with infinite possibilities. But then in Black Widow- and don't get me wrong, I loved Black Widow- Marvel couldn't resist the urge to make it relevant again. They answered the question, and boom, no more ambiguity, no more infinite possibilities, no more imagination.

Back to "I had a date," the same thing happens. The line makes us wonder; what if? What if Steve had lived? What kind of life would he have had? Would he be happy? And then there's this pain of not knowing, of NEVER knowing, of acknowledging that it is impossible to know, but still being curious enough to imagine it for ourselves despite that. Just like Steve, we can't help but imagine what life could have been. The impact is in the ambiguity, the IMPOSSIBLE. He has to move forward because he can't go back. It's his driving force. His crucible for character development. He's falling forward and scrambling to catch himself and adjust, and that's what transforms him. That's what makes him finally grow and mature.

But the writers can't let a line exist without making it a call-back, and they can't resist the urge to make it relevant again. They treat these character development lines like Chekov's gun. Instead of allowing the line to exist as initially intended- a feeling of loss, of missing out on life, of imagining a different life- they make it a book-end. Steve goes back and has his "date" and that's supposed to be satisfying because it's a call-back, but in actuality, it negates the initial impact of the line. We didn't want Steve to come "full circle." The hero's journey doesn't end with the accomplishment of the initial task. It ends with growth. It ends with a realization, for better or for worse, that what you wanted at the start is never going to be exactly what you get in the end because on the path to getting there, you were fundamentally changed.

Oh and this is the edit, by the way. Show it some love.

[cryinggarbagebag]

i should probably mention that this is only the first chapter! i will be uploading the rest onto AO3 so if you liked this please go check out the rest!!

After Hours || Steve Rogers

I posted this on AO3 as well but i thought it may be more successful on here. The Steve Rogers/Reader side of AO3 is dead right now (i think bc of thunderbolts). You can find the link below.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/67199275

Summary: You’re an ex-shield agent who has gotten a great offer from Tony Stark to move in to the new Avengers Compound and serve as the Compound Operations Director. You were unsure of your new position until a somewhat eventful outing with Steve Rogers convinced you otherwise. How will you adjust to the quietness of the compound after living in upper Manhattan for so long?

aka i miss 2014 Avengers fanfics and this is my attempt at bringing it back. All your favorite cliches from the good old days.

.-. The first time you met Steve Rogers was nothing extraordinary. A simple pass by in the hallway, a soft smile on the way to your briefing with Nick Fury and Tony Stark for your next mission. Of course you knew of Steve, he was Captain America for christ sakes. In all your years working with SHIELD, this was the first time you beheld him in person.

The second time you met Steve was at the tower when Tony needed to go over some details for the new Avengers compound to be built. You were standing across from Tony, jotting notes as he pointed to spots on various blueprints spread on the livingroom floor, of all places. “Better lighting,” he had said- but you knew it was really because he wanted people to be nosy.

And nosy they were.

Clint came and went, making a few remarks on where the archery simulation room would be in the training center. He also requested a copy of the HVAC system for the compound, claiming he just wanted to check how many vents would supply each room. “I run hot,” he qualified. I said nothing but quickly jotted a note to email him a copy.

Nastasha and Steve rounded the corner soon after, the former asking about the layout of the bedrooms, wondering what the bathroom situation would be. “Don’t worry, everyone has their own bathroom,” you supplied.

A smirk graced her face, “good, I hate sharing a bathroom with this animal and Barton,” she joked, nudging Steve playfully.

You gave a small laugh, “That's what I told the architect. He said plumbing would be a nightmare but he was convinced after a hefty tip from mister Stark,” You said. It was then that you looked at Steve. “Do you have any questions mister Rogers?”

He smiled softly, “oh no. I couldn’t care less if I’m honest. As long as I still have a place to stay and a decent gym,” he said kindly. “And it's just Steve. Have we met before?”

Steve held out his hand.

“Not formally,” you shook his hand, returning his smile, “I’m Y/n.”

“Yeah and she’s busy being my assistant right now so please take your stardom somewhere else Cap,” Tony huffed. You looked back at him as he pointed at another spot on the blueprint, “this whole room needs to be redone.”

You sighed gently, jotting down the note.

“Well it was nice to meet you Y/n,” Steve said before leaving with Natasha. You watched him go before snapping back to reality, jotting down more notes from Stark.

The third time you met Steve was when you were just coming back from your weekly grocery run for the tower. You had one earbud in your ear as you unloaded items from the grocery bags. Poptarts for Thor, just in case he decided to show up this week. Pancake mix for Sam, microwave breakfasts for Bucky, and a hoard of protein shakes for all of them, as well as a plethora of other staples. As you were placing the last of the protein shakes in the fridge, you heard something drop a few feet away. Your head snapped up to reveal Steve gathering up a stack of movies from the floor. You quickly took your earbud out, mumbling shit under your breath at the shock.

“Sorry if I scared you,” he chuckled, noticing your eyes were slightly wide.

Your shoulders relaxed, “I didn’t think anyone was home.”

“No it's just me right now,” he said, setting the stack of DVDs on the island. “Everyone got assigned a mission or a meeting it seems.”

You balled up the last grocery bag, adding it to the growing supply of them under the sink. “Well you better grab the good snacks while you can,” you hummed, “freshly stocked.”

You didn’t really know what else to say. You were in the presence of who, some may say, is the greatest superhero alive. But your job wasn’t to be awestruck- you worked with superheroes daily, your job was to get their groceries and help Tony with random bullshit, or anything except your actual job description.

“Thanks for doing this, I would have offered to help if I’d known,” Steve said, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.

You shrugged, “it’s my job. I do it every week.” You pulled the receipt from your purse, taking a picture of it before emailing it to the accountant so she could verify the purchases at the end of the month. You looked up again at the stack of DVD’s, “you finish those?”

Steve nodded, “Sam recommended these. I was just returning them to the library.”

“I can take them for you, I have to pass by the library on my way to the dry cleaners.” you moved to take the stack off the island but Steve grabbed them before you could.

“We can go together then, I need to pick up some new ones anyways. I’ve got almost seventy years to catch up on” he smiled, “if you don’t mind of course.”

You shrugged, fighting the slight wave of anxiety running through your chest. “No, I don’t mind at all.”

You ended up driving across town to the library together. Music played faintly in the car and it did nothing to calm the spiral of thoughts running through your head. God, why did you have to be so awkward? He was just a person. Sure he’s Captain America, but you knew better than to clump that up with who he was. He was Steve, a normal guy, a coworker, just like the others. A friendly face. Why was it so intimidating, then? I mean you could handle Tony Stark, Natasha was almost a good friend, you had a steady friendship with the others. Maybe it was because he was relatively new to your life. Years on the team and this is the first time you ever actually interacted with him, and now he was in your car, watching pedestrians as you waited in a heap of afternoon traffic. Until now you never really wanted super powers, but you silently begged the Gods for time travel, or even flight, anything to stop the silence quicker.

Steve, bless his heart, attempted to cool the tension. “I guess the traffic never really gets better, huh?” he asked rhetorically.

“New York is a overpopulated cesspool,” you grumbled, turning on your blinker in hopes of meeting your left turn soon. “Sometimes I wish I never moved here.”

The car behind you honked and you met the driver's eyes in the rearview mirror. You wanted to yell something, but since you were with company you let it go. Impatient asshole, you thought, I'm stuck in the same traffic you are.

An internal battle played in your mind, a fit of road rage kept silent by pure kindness. You wouldn’t act like that, not in front of Steve, by yourself maybe, but not in front of Steve. Finally traffic inched forward, not much, but your turn began coming into view before you were stopped again.

“Maybe we should have taken the subway,” you mumbled.

“I don’t mind, I don’t really have any plans today.” Steve said, “you said you’re not from here?”

You leaned back slightly in your seat, sighing, “No I’m from Jersey. Not much better but it was never this bad.” The car behind you honked again and you couldn’t resist, your head snapping to look over your shoulder.

“What do you want me to do??!” you yelled to the void of the backseat. Your shoulders tensed to your ears at the annoyance, and at the fact that Steve was staring at you.

“Jeez if i knew it would be bad i definitely would have suggested walking,” he said again.

“I’d prefer not to in heels, plus I had to get the dry cleaning and whatever else Tony needs me to do.” Your fingers drummed on the steering wheel.

“So are you actually his assistant?” he asked, “I feel like i’d have met you sooner.”

You shook your head, “no I’m actually a shield agent, but i got an injury a while back so this is Fury’s idea of light duty.” Finally the car in front if you moved enough for you to turn the corner- thankfully to a less busy street. You let your shoulders drop as you returned to your journey through the concrete jungle.

“Really? And we’re just now meeting?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve been assigned a few air patrols for your missions, never anything on the ground,” I responded, pulling into the parking lot of the library. “Well here we are, do you want me to stay here or..?”

“I might be a minute. Sam gave me a list. There's a coffee shop nearby if you want to wait there, or you’re more than welcome to come with me.” He said kindly, getting out of the car. I grabbed my purse from the floorboard and turned off the car before getting out and scanning the QR code on the parking meter to pay.

“Tell you what, I’ll get us coffee and you can meet me there when you’re done,” you offered.

“Sounds like a plan. I’ll try not to take too long. Be safe,” he smiled before turning and heading up the front steps of the library.

You let out a breath before turning in the direction of the coffee shop. It was a short walk- maybe five minutes, so your feet didn’t hurt too bad in your sensible black heels. Your blouse and trousers did well to shield from the cool breeze. As you opened the door to the coffee shop you were immediately enveloped into a warm, espresso scented embrace. As you waited in the short line you realized you didn’t ask Steve what kind of coffee he wanted. You scanned the menu nervously, trying to gauge what he would like based on your minimal knowledge of him personally. You settled on a classic cappuccino for him and an iced vanilla latte for you. You sat in a booth by yourself, deciding to catch up on some emails. You pulled your ipad from your purse to look at some blueprints and models, sent your preferences from the other day to the architect, drawing up some changes for your office space. Yes, Tony somehow convinced you to move into the new Avengers Compound once it was built- a new title coming with it. Compound Operations Director. You would still work for SHIELD, coming in for missions as needed, but your injury wasn’t looking any better, plus you’d be out of the hustle and bustle of the city. You hadn’t officially given him your answer, but it was starting to look more appealing every day. You loved your team, the Avengers were some of your closest friends, and it would be safer- not to mention pay better. You’d have a leadership position, which was always a dream of yours. It would be a good decision all around. You’d miss your Manhattan apartment, but it would be a good change. Plus, you could probably keep your apartment for when you’d need to come back to the city, or when you spent a rare night on the town. You wondered how your cat would get along with Bucky’s. You tried not to let that deter you- you'd have half a floor to yourself courtesy of Tony, so if anything your cat could just stay there. Every concern you had always had a logical answer, it’s like you were meant to go. It would be a new, exciting challenge. You wondered if you should mention it to Steve, but you decided that you’d just let word come out naturally during the transition. You had a meeting with Tony later this week and you’d tell him then, and discuss the logistics of your move, your salary, all of those important things.

You sipped your drink absentmindedly, circling a point on another model and writing in your opinions and notes. You wondered how long Steve would be. You had to get to the dry cleaners by four and it was only 2:45, so you hoped he wouldn’t be long. Who knew how long it would take to drive with the traffic. You cursed Stark for his expensive taste in dry cleaners. He just had to get his done five blocks out of the way of the tower. You took another sip of your drink, looking up as the bell above the door jingled and Steve strode inside, looking around before catching your eye and walking your direction.

“This seat taken?” He asked.

You shook your head, “be my guest, Rogers.” You pushed his drink towards him as he sat down across from you, “I wasn’t sure what you liked. Got you a cappuccino, I hope that's okay.”

“That's just fine, thank you.” he said. Steve took a long sip of his drink before setting it back down, “still warm too.”

“I prefer iced,” you hummed, “did you find any good movies?”

He nodded, looking down at the tote bag for a moment, “I got all three of the Godfather movies, as well as the first Jurassic Park.”

“Can’t say I’ve seen any of those,” You said sheepishly, finishing off your drink.

“Really? Sam said they were classics. You’re welcome to watch them with me,” he offered.

“I’m pretty busy most of the time, but if I’m free then sure,” you said, turning off your ipad and putting it in your purse, “are you ready to get going? I have to be at the dry cleaners before they close.”

“Sure,” he said, getting up and following you out of the shop, you threw away your cup on the way out, before walking back to the car. You get in and push the start button and are met with silence. Your eyes widened.

“I swear to god…” you mumbled, pressing the button again- still, nothing. “You have got to be fucking kidding me!” You groaned, slamming your face into your hands quickly before looking up again. “We’re going to have to walk,” You said to Steve, getting back out of the car and slamming the door. You scanned the qr code on the meter again and paid for another hour before dialing up Stark's mechanic. The line rang as you started walking in the direction of the dry cleaners.

“How far is it?” Steve asked, walking in time beside you.

“Five blocks,” you sighed, hoping your heels wouldn’t betray you. “We should be okay if we hurry,” you picked up the pace a bit, determined. Your arms were folded across your chest, fighting the cool breeze as you walked. Finally the call picked up.

“This is John,” the man on the other line greeted.

“Hi John, this is Y/n, listen my car broke down outside of the library. Any way you could send someone to tow it or jump it?”

The man agreed and you thanked him before hanging up, sighing. “I’ll never hear the end of it once Stark finds out.”

Steve didn’t say anything, maybe because he could sense that you were one mishap away from insanity. Your heels clicked on the pavement, you knew you probably looked insane as you stormed through the busy sidewalks of Manhattan, Steve at your side, giving you some distance but keeping a steady pace. The journey was a blur, fueled by coffee and frustration. The only constant was the slow ache forming in your feet, and the sound of Steve's footsteps matching yours and you weaved through the bustling sidewalks. Eventually you came up to the dry cleaners, Steve was kind enough to get the door for you and you stepped inside.

You greeted the lady at the counter, giving her the slip for Tony’s clothes and she disappeared to the back. You leaned against the counter, shifting your weight from foot to foot.

“Maybe I should establish a new dress code,” you sighed, “one where I can just wear flat shoes.”

“Can you do that?” He asked.

“I’m not sure, but I think it's worth a shot,” you shrugged as the lady came back with Tony’s clothes. You paid her before leaving. You made the trek back to the car where the mechanic was jumping the battery. The car roared to life and you sighed in relief.

“Thanks so much,” you said to the mechanic, handing him some cash as a tip- Stark Industries would be invoiced for the payment. You and Steve got settled in the car before heading back to the tower. He helped you bring in the dry cleaning to the elevator and you didn’t hesitate before taking off your heels, sighing in relief.

“Thank you for coming with me, sorry it ended up a marathon,” you said, leaning against the glass wall of the elevator.

“It was my pleasure, I was glad to keep you company,” he said kindly. The doors opened and you dropped off the clothes in Tony’s closet, before you and Steve went your separate ways.

That evening as you sat on your couch in your Manhattan apartment, savoring a glass of wine and a box of pizza, you thought back on your day, and the possibilities of your new position. It wouldn’t be bad at all. And you were already accepted by the Avengers, they all liked you- even Bucky who rarely spoke to anyone. Maybe this would be good for you.

You gazed at your cat who lounged on the windowsill. Maybe you needed to be around more people, it did get lonely, just the two of you all the time. You thought back on your day with Steve, how kind he was despite your horrible day. You smiled to yourself, sipping your wine once more. Yes, this would be a good thing. A very, very, good thing.

[cryinggarbagebag]

25 posts!

[cryinggarbagebag]

After Hours || Steve Rogers

I posted this on AO3 as well but i thought it may be more successful on here. The Steve Rogers/Reader side of AO3 is dead right now (i think bc of thunderbolts). You can find the link below.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/67199275

Summary: You’re an ex-shield agent who has gotten a great offer from Tony Stark to move in to the new Avengers Compound and serve as the Compound Operations Director. You were unsure of your new position until a somewhat eventful outing with Steve Rogers convinced you otherwise. How will you adjust to the quietness of the compound after living in upper Manhattan for so long?

aka i miss 2014 Avengers fanfics and this is my attempt at bringing it back. All your favorite cliches from the good old days.

.-. The first time you met Steve Rogers was nothing extraordinary. A simple pass by in the hallway, a soft smile on the way to your briefing with Nick Fury and Tony Stark for your next mission. Of course you knew of Steve, he was Captain America for christ sakes. In all your years working with SHIELD, this was the first time you beheld him in person.

The second time you met Steve was at the tower when Tony needed to go over some details for the new Avengers compound to be built. You were standing across from Tony, jotting notes as he pointed to spots on various blueprints spread on the livingroom floor, of all places. “Better lighting,” he had said- but you knew it was really because he wanted people to be nosy.

And nosy they were.

Clint came and went, making a few remarks on where the archery simulation room would be in the training center. He also requested a copy of the HVAC system for the compound, claiming he just wanted to check how many vents would supply each room. “I run hot,” he qualified. I said nothing but quickly jotted a note to email him a copy.

Nastasha and Steve rounded the corner soon after, the former asking about the layout of the bedrooms, wondering what the bathroom situation would be. “Don’t worry, everyone has their own bathroom,” you supplied.

A smirk graced her face, “good, I hate sharing a bathroom with this animal and Barton,” she joked, nudging Steve playfully.

You gave a small laugh, “That's what I told the architect. He said plumbing would be a nightmare but he was convinced after a hefty tip from mister Stark,” You said. It was then that you looked at Steve. “Do you have any questions mister Rogers?”

He smiled softly, “oh no. I couldn’t care less if I’m honest. As long as I still have a place to stay and a decent gym,” he said kindly. “And it's just Steve. Have we met before?”

Steve held out his hand.

“Not formally,” you shook his hand, returning his smile, “I’m Y/n.”

“Yeah and she’s busy being my assistant right now so please take your stardom somewhere else Cap,” Tony huffed. You looked back at him as he pointed at another spot on the blueprint, “this whole room needs to be redone.”

You sighed gently, jotting down the note.

“Well it was nice to meet you Y/n,” Steve said before leaving with Natasha. You watched him go before snapping back to reality, jotting down more notes from Stark.

The third time you met Steve was when you were just coming back from your weekly grocery run for the tower. You had one earbud in your ear as you unloaded items from the grocery bags. Poptarts for Thor, just in case he decided to show up this week. Pancake mix for Sam, microwave breakfasts for Bucky, and a hoard of protein shakes for all of them, as well as a plethora of other staples. As you were placing the last of the protein shakes in the fridge, you heard something drop a few feet away. Your head snapped up to reveal Steve gathering up a stack of movies from the floor. You quickly took your earbud out, mumbling shit under your breath at the shock.

“Sorry if I scared you,” he chuckled, noticing your eyes were slightly wide.

Your shoulders relaxed, “I didn’t think anyone was home.”

“No it's just me right now,” he said, setting the stack of DVDs on the island. “Everyone got assigned a mission or a meeting it seems.”

You balled up the last grocery bag, adding it to the growing supply of them under the sink. “Well you better grab the good snacks while you can,” you hummed, “freshly stocked.”

You didn’t really know what else to say. You were in the presence of who, some may say, is the greatest superhero alive. But your job wasn’t to be awestruck- you worked with superheroes daily, your job was to get their groceries and help Tony with random bullshit, or anything except your actual job description.

“Thanks for doing this, I would have offered to help if I’d known,” Steve said, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.

You shrugged, “it’s my job. I do it every week.” You pulled the receipt from your purse, taking a picture of it before emailing it to the accountant so she could verify the purchases at the end of the month. You looked up again at the stack of DVD’s, “you finish those?”

Steve nodded, “Sam recommended these. I was just returning them to the library.”

“I can take them for you, I have to pass by the library on my way to the dry cleaners.” you moved to take the stack off the island but Steve grabbed them before you could.

“We can go together then, I need to pick up some new ones anyways. I’ve got almost seventy years to catch up on” he smiled, “if you don’t mind of course.”

You shrugged, fighting the slight wave of anxiety running through your chest. “No, I don’t mind at all.”

You ended up driving across town to the library together. Music played faintly in the car and it did nothing to calm the spiral of thoughts running through your head. God, why did you have to be so awkward? He was just a person. Sure he’s Captain America, but you knew better than to clump that up with who he was. He was Steve, a normal guy, a coworker, just like the others. A friendly face. Why was it so intimidating, then? I mean you could handle Tony Stark, Natasha was almost a good friend, you had a steady friendship with the others. Maybe it was because he was relatively new to your life. Years on the team and this is the first time you ever actually interacted with him, and now he was in your car, watching pedestrians as you waited in a heap of afternoon traffic. Until now you never really wanted super powers, but you silently begged the Gods for time travel, or even flight, anything to stop the silence quicker.

Steve, bless his heart, attempted to cool the tension. “I guess the traffic never really gets better, huh?” he asked rhetorically.

“New York is a overpopulated cesspool,” you grumbled, turning on your blinker in hopes of meeting your left turn soon. “Sometimes I wish I never moved here.”

The car behind you honked and you met the driver's eyes in the rearview mirror. You wanted to yell something, but since you were with company you let it go. Impatient asshole, you thought, I'm stuck in the same traffic you are.

An internal battle played in your mind, a fit of road rage kept silent by pure kindness. You wouldn’t act like that, not in front of Steve, by yourself maybe, but not in front of Steve. Finally traffic inched forward, not much, but your turn began coming into view before you were stopped again.

“Maybe we should have taken the subway,” you mumbled.

“I don’t mind, I don’t really have any plans today.” Steve said, “you said you’re not from here?”

You leaned back slightly in your seat, sighing, “No I’m from Jersey. Not much better but it was never this bad.” The car behind you honked again and you couldn’t resist, your head snapping to look over your shoulder.

“What do you want me to do??!” you yelled to the void of the backseat. Your shoulders tensed to your ears at the annoyance, and at the fact that Steve was staring at you.

“Jeez if i knew it would be bad i definitely would have suggested walking,” he said again.

“I’d prefer not to in heels, plus I had to get the dry cleaning and whatever else Tony needs me to do.” Your fingers drummed on the steering wheel.

“So are you actually his assistant?” he asked, “I feel like i’d have met you sooner.”

You shook your head, “no I’m actually a shield agent, but i got an injury a while back so this is Fury’s idea of light duty.” Finally the car in front if you moved enough for you to turn the corner- thankfully to a less busy street. You let your shoulders drop as you returned to your journey through the concrete jungle.

“Really? And we’re just now meeting?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve been assigned a few air patrols for your missions, never anything on the ground,” I responded, pulling into the parking lot of the library. “Well here we are, do you want me to stay here or..?”

“I might be a minute. Sam gave me a list. There's a coffee shop nearby if you want to wait there, or you’re more than welcome to come with me.” He said kindly, getting out of the car. I grabbed my purse from the floorboard and turned off the car before getting out and scanning the QR code on the parking meter to pay.

“Tell you what, I’ll get us coffee and you can meet me there when you’re done,” you offered.

“Sounds like a plan. I’ll try not to take too long. Be safe,” he smiled before turning and heading up the front steps of the library.

You let out a breath before turning in the direction of the coffee shop. It was a short walk- maybe five minutes, so your feet didn’t hurt too bad in your sensible black heels. Your blouse and trousers did well to shield from the cool breeze. As you opened the door to the coffee shop you were immediately enveloped into a warm, espresso scented embrace. As you waited in the short line you realized you didn’t ask Steve what kind of coffee he wanted. You scanned the menu nervously, trying to gauge what he would like based on your minimal knowledge of him personally. You settled on a classic cappuccino for him and an iced vanilla latte for you. You sat in a booth by yourself, deciding to catch up on some emails. You pulled your ipad from your purse to look at some blueprints and models, sent your preferences from the other day to the architect, drawing up some changes for your office space. Yes, Tony somehow convinced you to move into the new Avengers Compound once it was built- a new title coming with it. Compound Operations Director. You would still work for SHIELD, coming in for missions as needed, but your injury wasn’t looking any better, plus you’d be out of the hustle and bustle of the city. You hadn’t officially given him your answer, but it was starting to look more appealing every day. You loved your team, the Avengers were some of your closest friends, and it would be safer- not to mention pay better. You’d have a leadership position, which was always a dream of yours. It would be a good decision all around. You’d miss your Manhattan apartment, but it would be a good change. Plus, you could probably keep your apartment for when you’d need to come back to the city, or when you spent a rare night on the town. You wondered how your cat would get along with Bucky’s. You tried not to let that deter you- you'd have half a floor to yourself courtesy of Tony, so if anything your cat could just stay there. Every concern you had always had a logical answer, it’s like you were meant to go. It would be a new, exciting challenge. You wondered if you should mention it to Steve, but you decided that you’d just let word come out naturally during the transition. You had a meeting with Tony later this week and you’d tell him then, and discuss the logistics of your move, your salary, all of those important things.

You sipped your drink absentmindedly, circling a point on another model and writing in your opinions and notes. You wondered how long Steve would be. You had to get to the dry cleaners by four and it was only 2:45, so you hoped he wouldn’t be long. Who knew how long it would take to drive with the traffic. You cursed Stark for his expensive taste in dry cleaners. He just had to get his done five blocks out of the way of the tower. You took another sip of your drink, looking up as the bell above the door jingled and Steve strode inside, looking around before catching your eye and walking your direction.

“This seat taken?” He asked.

You shook your head, “be my guest, Rogers.” You pushed his drink towards him as he sat down across from you, “I wasn’t sure what you liked. Got you a cappuccino, I hope that's okay.”

“That's just fine, thank you.” he said. Steve took a long sip of his drink before setting it back down, “still warm too.”

“I prefer iced,” you hummed, “did you find any good movies?”

He nodded, looking down at the tote bag for a moment, “I got all three of the Godfather movies, as well as the first Jurassic Park.”

“Can’t say I’ve seen any of those,” You said sheepishly, finishing off your drink.

“Really? Sam said they were classics. You’re welcome to watch them with me,” he offered.

“I’m pretty busy most of the time, but if I’m free then sure,” you said, turning off your ipad and putting it in your purse, “are you ready to get going? I have to be at the dry cleaners before they close.”

“Sure,” he said, getting up and following you out of the shop, you threw away your cup on the way out, before walking back to the car. You get in and push the start button and are met with silence. Your eyes widened.

“I swear to god…” you mumbled, pressing the button again- still, nothing. “You have got to be fucking kidding me!” You groaned, slamming your face into your hands quickly before looking up again. “We’re going to have to walk,” You said to Steve, getting back out of the car and slamming the door. You scanned the qr code on the meter again and paid for another hour before dialing up Stark's mechanic. The line rang as you started walking in the direction of the dry cleaners.

“How far is it?” Steve asked, walking in time beside you.

“Five blocks,” you sighed, hoping your heels wouldn’t betray you. “We should be okay if we hurry,” you picked up the pace a bit, determined. Your arms were folded across your chest, fighting the cool breeze as you walked. Finally the call picked up.

“This is John,” the man on the other line greeted.

“Hi John, this is Y/n, listen my car broke down outside of the library. Any way you could send someone to tow it or jump it?”

The man agreed and you thanked him before hanging up, sighing. “I’ll never hear the end of it once Stark finds out.”

Steve didn’t say anything, maybe because he could sense that you were one mishap away from insanity. Your heels clicked on the pavement, you knew you probably looked insane as you stormed through the busy sidewalks of Manhattan, Steve at your side, giving you some distance but keeping a steady pace. The journey was a blur, fueled by coffee and frustration. The only constant was the slow ache forming in your feet, and the sound of Steve's footsteps matching yours and you weaved through the bustling sidewalks. Eventually you came up to the dry cleaners, Steve was kind enough to get the door for you and you stepped inside.

You greeted the lady at the counter, giving her the slip for Tony’s clothes and she disappeared to the back. You leaned against the counter, shifting your weight from foot to foot.

“Maybe I should establish a new dress code,” you sighed, “one where I can just wear flat shoes.”

“Can you do that?” He asked.

“I’m not sure, but I think it's worth a shot,” you shrugged as the lady came back with Tony’s clothes. You paid her before leaving. You made the trek back to the car where the mechanic was jumping the battery. The car roared to life and you sighed in relief.

“Thanks so much,” you said to the mechanic, handing him some cash as a tip- Stark Industries would be invoiced for the payment. You and Steve got settled in the car before heading back to the tower. He helped you bring in the dry cleaning to the elevator and you didn’t hesitate before taking off your heels, sighing in relief.

“Thank you for coming with me, sorry it ended up a marathon,” you said, leaning against the glass wall of the elevator.

“It was my pleasure, I was glad to keep you company,” he said kindly. The doors opened and you dropped off the clothes in Tony’s closet, before you and Steve went your separate ways.

That evening as you sat on your couch in your Manhattan apartment, savoring a glass of wine and a box of pizza, you thought back on your day, and the possibilities of your new position. It wouldn’t be bad at all. And you were already accepted by the Avengers, they all liked you- even Bucky who rarely spoke to anyone. Maybe this would be good for you.

You gazed at your cat who lounged on the windowsill. Maybe you needed to be around more people, it did get lonely, just the two of you all the time. You thought back on your day with Steve, how kind he was despite your horrible day. You smiled to yourself, sipping your wine once more. Yes, this would be a good thing. A very, very, good thing.

[cryinggarbagebag]

heat. || bradley “rooster” bradshaw x f!reader.

After working a long day at the Hard Deck, a special visitor arrives just before close. The San Diego heat isn’t the only thing that soon gets you hot under the collar.

Explicit Sexual Content. Post-Beach Scene. Minimal Top-Gun Maverick Spoilers.

Word Count: 4.3k

WARNINGS: Explicit 18+ Content. Jerking Off. Oral Sex (F!Receiving). Vaginal Sex. Dirty Talk. Alcohol (But No Drunkenness). Explicit Language. Not Beta-Read. Slight Top-Gun Maverick Spoilers.

Support your content creators! Likes are appreciated, but comments and reblogs are golden!

Keep reading

[cryinggarbagebag]

if you’re up for it, #33 from the fluff list — “i can’t think around you.” or #3 from the smut list — “do that again.” with obi-wan? 👀 or both mixed together ajshdhs whatever you wanna do!! no pressure if they don’t click tho ❤️ (also female or gender neutral pronouns are fine!)

Your wish is my command!! :)

Distracted

Obi Wan x Fem!Reader

Summary: The tank top you wore kept your dear friend, Obi Wan, distracted, delaying your journey to the outer rim.

Warnings: smut!!

Word count: 1.2k

(gif not mine)

The glimmering stars painted a gloss over your eyes as you stared at the endlessness of it all. As you sat yourself in the co-pilot seat of the ship, you prepared yourself for the jump to hyperspace. The trip would be long, Obi Wan reminded you, so you needed to get comfortable. Your tunic was warm, but the ship was warmer. You removed it, leaving yourself still covered with a thin tank top. Wearing a bra was never your thing, but you hoped that Obi Wan wouldn't notice how your breasts rested freely on your chest beneath the thin material.

Just as the thought of him left your mind, he joined you up front into the pilot's seat, returning from checking some internal wiring before beginning your journey. You glanced over to Obi Wan as he landed in his seat.

"Everything looks good. We are ready to go" He reported.

Then, from the corner of your eye, you watched him pause in his motions to notice the lack of clothing on your upper body.

"Were you...wearing that before?" He asked, playing it off like he was only confused about your attire.

"No, its hot in here. I took off my tunic. You told me to get comfortable" You reminded him, snarky as ever.

"Ah, I did" He concurred.

His attempt to enter the coordinates was distracted, which is unlike him. He selected incorrect buttons, and grew frustrated at getting it wrong. You noticed it right away.

"Are you alright, Obi-Wan?" You tried to console him for whatever it was. You placed your hand on his shoulder and he sunk into your reach.

"Yes. I'm quite alright. Um.." He looked around, scatter brained and absentminded of what he was doing. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"You were putting in the coordinates, right?"

He sighed deeply, looking over to you, where his eyes obviously travelled down your face and past your collar bone. His eyelids shut slowly as he turned back toward the controls.

"I can't...I can't think around you" He mumbled shamefully, refusing to look back in your direction.

"What?" You laughed softly, sitting up in your seat in attempt to make Obi Wan look at you. You thought maybe he was joking.

"Y/N" He went on, "I can't focus unless you put your top back on"

You grew annoyed. How is it your problem that he's distracted?

"I'm covered" You fumed.

"Barely" He spat back. You weren't sure if he was angry with you, or himself. Knowing Obi Wan, it was likely the latter.

"It's hot in here, Obi Wan. I'm not going to be uncomfortable so you're not distracted by my tits"

He snapped his neck toward you, displeased with how you spoke to him.

"This is incredibly inappropriate and unprofessional" He sassed, throwing himself to lean back in the chair, refusing to go anywhere until you did as he asked.

You couldn't lie, it turned you to know that your body had this much affect on him. Instead of complying, why not have fun with it?

You rose from your seat, taking a small step in the cramped space to stand directly in front of him, looking down as he leaned back.

"What are you doing?" He inquired, his tone already seemingly correcting itself.

You leaned down slowly, his face remaining puzzled.

"Why don't I do something about that?" You asked, looking into his lap to the noticeable bulge making an appearance. He looked down to it, blushing with embarrassment. He wanted to resist but how could he ever begin to resist you? He fantasized about this nearly every day.

"I..." He began, swallowing hard when he was provided the view down the low cut of your tank top. "Stars, Y/N"

"Tell me you don't want this, and I won't" You requested his consent.

He said nothing, but continued to stare in amazement. You leaned up, ready to walk away, but he grabbed your hand before you could leave his sight.

"Please" He begged, for what, you didn't know if he knew for sure. He just needed you to provide him release.

Never breaking eye contact, you remove your shoes and trousers, setting them out of the way, leaving you now in your underwear and the dreaded tank top that started this. You straddle his open hips, hovering your aching heat above his hard-on.

"Well I know we don't have a lot of time...because, y'know, there's places to be" You began, pressing your hips into his, grinding against him with the slightest pressure. A shattered breath escaped him. "But I don't think this will take us long" You purred.

"I'd never be able to last long inside a woman like you anyways. Please" He pleaded, his expression and tone growing adorably desperate for you. His hands trailed down your body, stopping at your waist, squeezing it tightly. You kissed him passionately, like you missed him, and he welcomed it tenderly. You grinded into him with more pressure, dragging your covered slit over his full erection.

"Do that again" He whimpered.

You continued grinding into him, bring pleasurable sensations to both of you. Simultaneously, you worked to remove that thin material that shielded your breasts from him. As they were freed from the clinging top, he groaned, a deep hunger lingering in his throat.

His calloused fingers traced your nipples and cupped your supple breasts while you continued to tease him with your hips. You whimpered as you felt him against you, losing yourself in overpowering him.

"Darling I need to feel inside of you" He whined.

You pulled your panties to the side as he hurriedly released his throbbing cock from its restraints.

With impatience and eagerness, you quickly lowered onto him, gasping as he filled you completely.

"Oh my..." He murmured, unable to say anything else.

"Fuck, Obi Wan" You groaned, using his shoulders to hold onto as you began to move. You curled your thrusts up and down his shaft, maximizing the pleasurable experience for you both.

"Oh my love...is this what I was missing out on? All this time I've known you, and I never knew you'd feel this good around my cock" He panted, running his hand down the curves of your body, gripping your hips to guide you further.

As previously promised, he wasn't going to last much longer, and you felt your own orgasm approaching as well. What he did next shocked you. He stood suddenly, lifting you with him, and moved behind the cockpit to press your back against the steel wall. You cried out as he began slamming into you, losing complete control within your slickness.

He brought his fingers down to your clit, working to bring you to orgasm, hoping to time it with his own.

"So beautiful. Gods, look at you" He continued, his breath growing shaking, and his body tensing.

"Are you gonna cum inside me, Obi Wan?" You moaned, and all he could do was nod.

Your growing climax threatened to unravel, and you tried to hold it back. Thankfully it was no use, because only seconds later, your walls pulsated and your legs went weak. It exploded within you, consuming you completely.

"Yes, darling that's it" He coaxed you within the same second that his thrusts slowed, and he released himself inside you. You felt the heat, and how it began to drip out of you already.

Your rapid breathing refused to cease as you stared into his eyes, wondering who would say something first.

"Do you think we can get going now?" You chuckled. He smiled back sweetly.

"I am sorry for snapping at you earlier. Hopefully doing this grants me forgiveness"

"It will. As long as you're down to do this again sometime" You breathed.

"Oh, certainly. Already looking forward to it" He grinned.

I HOPE YOU LOVE IT DARLING @laserbrains

[cryinggarbagebag]

“not all men” you’re right Atticus Finch would never do this

[cryinggarbagebag]

Tony Starks eyes appreciation post

my god look at him 😍

[cryinggarbagebag]

HOOOOLY SHIT I'M JUST- 😳😳😳

The Stand In

Title: The Stand In

Characters: Bucky x Reader, Sam Wilson x Reader, Steve, mentions of Fury, Tony, and Maria. 

Prompt: Filming themselves having sex- square fill for @star-spangled-bingo​

Summary: While Bucky is away on a long-term mission with Fury, he finds a solution to the sexual frustration that his time away has created inside of you. 

Warnings: Bucky and Sam getting along, minor feelings of guilt, sexual frustration/yearning, all the smut, filming themselves having sex, implied future threesome.

Word Count: 4.3k

A/N: No beta on this one. Still new to writing these guys but I couldn’t resist the opportunity to write both of them x reader in the same fic lol. Apparently I use lots of variations of their names for these fuckers, so sorry if that weirds anyone out. Feedback and/or ‘support’ are greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading, hope y’all like it. 

“Doesn’t Nick know that I have needs?” you huff, knowing how ridiculous you sound but not bringing yourself to care. 

Bucky laughs honestly, eyeing Fury from across the room to gauge how much time he has left on the phone with you. “Well, it’s Fury, so…. No. And if he does, he doesn’t care.” 

“And you have no idea when he’s gonna bring you back from wherever-the-fuck you are?”

“I’m sorry, doll.” 

Keep reading

[cryinggarbagebag]

Study Session

Sam Wilson X Reader

A/N: I gotta give a shout out and thanks to @thetaoofzoe​ for helping me when I got stuck. I really do appreciate it babes!

Warning: Smut

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Steve, I need you to take this to Y/N later,” Bucky said to one of the men sitting in his kitchen while he was busy at the counter preparing some food one stormy Saturday afternoon. 

“What is it?” Steve asked.

“Lunch.”

“Why do you need him to take her lunch? Especially in this weather,” Sam asked, looking up from the magazine he was reading and out the window at the rain cascading down in sheets outside. “Where is she anyway? I haven’t seen her around lately.”

“She’s been at the library, studying,” Bucky explained, turning to look at his friends with pride in his eyes. “She’s been working on her final paper for one of her classes.”

Bucky went back to fixing your lunch. Since he had deemed the food in the cafeteria inadequate for you, everyday he had fixed and brought you lunch while you worked away at the college library. 

You had come to stay with him when you had been accepted to the graduate program at the university near him. He was incredibly proud of you. Though you weren’t blood related, you had been something like a little sister to him for years. He had known your family from back in the day and when he found out that you were struggling, he decided to take you under his wing and help you out.

Which also meant he was overprotective of you too, scaring off any guy you had brought near him. He would sit menacingly across from them, sharpening his knives and flexing his vibranium arm. In his eyes there wasn’t anyone good enough for you. So you had given up on the guys around campus and decided to focus on getting into grad school. Once you did and had moved in with him, your attention was taken by another guy; this time not one on campus. He was a bit more closer to home. 

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[cryinggarbagebag]

y'all 3 days of work just went down the garbage can because apparently even if you save your draft before moving it to your queue, it doesn't actually fucking save it at all. so brb while I go cry

[cryinggarbagebag]

if you look like this:

PLEASE HMU

[cryinggarbagebag]

I mean... shii

NO CHEATING: You’re starring in a movie with the last person saved in your camera roll and the last song you listened to is the title. Who/what is it?

Okay i’m okay with this! 🤣💜

[cryinggarbagebag]

Inner Peace- Obi wan Kenobi

a/n: if you see this could you please comment something :(

pairings: Obi wan x padawan! reader

warnings: none just fluff

synopsis: what happens when obi wan senses something the matter with you?

.-.

"you must focus y/n" you heard your master say as he paced the floor.

"but master I cant" you complained.

"you can, you just need to calm your mind. try again." he responded.

you sighed and closed your eyes again, trying to focus on pure nothingness but for some reason you kept seeing a pair of eyes that were all too familiar.

after a minute you cursed under your breath and opened your eyes, "master it's impossible!"

he hummed in annoyance and asked, "what could possibly be stopping you from doing a simple meditation?"

his words were harsh, but there just didn't seem to be any other way with you. no matter what you did, it was never right for him. after Anakin died and the Jedi basically disappeared you had begged obi wan to stay as your master, but there was just not enough good in the Jedi any more. it was evident in how you acted and the evil poisoned your veins.

"I keep seeing Anakin master" you confessed, tucking your knees to your chest.

he sighed again but this time he gave you a sympathetic look.

"I know it's hard for you y/n" he said, kneeling in front of you, "but you need to try and erase him from you mind".

"I don't think I can. he was my best friend master."

"I know" Obi wan said. he was silent for a moment and you felt sadness radiate off of him. "you know what? training is over. go get some rest"

"thank you master" you said and slowly stood up, you legs hurt from sitting all day. then you made your way to the door, "goodnight".

"goodnight y/n" he said and offered you a kind smile. you smiled back before leaving the room and heading to your room.

Obi wan and you had inhabited an adequate sized hut on tatooine after the fall of the Jedi. it was secluded and perfect for two people. your rooms were separated by a courtyard which also hosted as a cooking area. your bedrooms were as bland as the sand that covered the planet, only holding a bed, a dresser and a small mirror on your wall. there was also a bathroom that wasn't decorated either. you missed your home on coruscant, the small apartment you lived in had been so much brighter and lively. you missed hearing the buzz of ships and staying up late with Anakin, reading Jedi texts or just being silly. telling jokes until you choked from laughter. you missed him dearly, he had been your first and only friend in the Jedi academy and he was basically your brother. Anakin was a few years older than you and he protected you from everything. that night there was no more protection. not from him anyways.

as you changed in to your night clothes, images of that night played in the back of you mind. waking up in your dark room and feeling something entirely bad bottled up in the building. running past Jedi who were trying to escape, padme calling for Anakin, eventually you found him standing at the end of the hallway as if he had been waiting for you. his lightsaber lit up his face in the dark.

"you don't have to do this Anakin!" you had called but it was too late, he had ran to you with his saber in a defensive position, and right before it hits you, it flew from his hands and turned off. Obi wan stood on the other side of you with his saber. Anakin turned from you and ran down the opposite hallway.

you went to bed on autopilot, not really paying attention because of the daydream you were having.

"are you alright?" obi wan had asked you in a panicked voice. you only nodded and tried to hide how horrified you were.

"go with padme. keep her safe" he told you, putting his hand on your shoulder.

"of course master" you said in a shakey voice. he started down twords where Anakin had gone but before he could disappear you called to him, "Obi wan!"

he turned around, shocked to hear his name out of your mouth, "y/n?"

your eyes had welled up with tears, "don't let him kill you".

don't let him kill you. it was a strange request. should you have said the opposite? Anakin was closer to you than Obi wan, and Anakin was the one in trouble. maybe deep down in your heart you knew he was too far gone..

"I won't".

there was a knock at your door and you snapped out of your daydream.

"what?" you asked, your voice was dry from breathing hard.

"are you alright?" you heard him say through the door.

"yes? are you?" you lied.

"I know that's not true, may I come in?" he asked politely.

"yes" you said and unlocked the door with the force. he slowly opened the door and took a seat at the edge of your bed. his blue eyes were illuminated by the moonlight.

"tell me what's wrong" he said softly. you sat up in bed and leaned against the headboard. it was silent for a moment before you looked down at you hands.

"I can't stop thinking about him" you mumbled. "I know we weren't supposed to be attached to anyone but I loved him"

tears started to blur your vision as you rambled, "he was my brother and when he died I wanted to kill myself Obi. I don't know what to do... maybe I wasn't ment to be a jedi"

his eyes widened at your words. Obi wan had never seen you look so completely helpless. he wanted to hold you and assure you that everything would be ok.

"y/n" he started, "I'm so sorry you feel this way. I know I've been harsh to you recently and I want to make it better. don't ever think you're not good enough, you're here for a reason. I know losing him was hard, I loved him aswell." he swallowed thickly, trying to keep a calm aura. "but I know that wasn't him. it was an evil one cannot control, and I know that if he were here today you would be happy and nothing would be the matter"

Obi wan choked on his words when he saw your broken face. he reached out and grasped your hands, "please y/n, don't keep it to yourself. you were made for greatness I know. what can I do to help?"

you let out a shakey breath as tears fell on to your lap. you didn't want to cry in front of your master. it was embarrassing to be crying like a child. but he didn't say anything so you continued to let out silent tears. your head hung low and your shoulders shaked lightly.

"y/n" he mumbled, almost silently.

you looked up at him, sniffing lightly.

"do you need anything?" he asked, "absolutely anything?"

you wanted him to hold you. it was wrong to find this comfort in your master and you knew that if you asked we would probably revert back to his old ways. he somehow sensed it from your silence because he scooted closer to you and pulled you into his arms. you choked out a sob into his shoulder, feeling an overwhelming feeling of something you couldn't describe. it was a warm feeling, that spread throughout your body. you clung onto each other and soaked in the warmth. he ran his thumb up and down your back. after a moment you slowly pulled away and looked up at him. he wiped the tears from your eyes and smiled timidly.

"thank you" you mumbled.

"of course" he said, but his hand lingered on your face. you subconsciously leaned into his touch. your arms were still loosely draped on his shoulders and you realized how intimate the position was. neither of you pulled away though, instead you noticed his gaze travel to your lips, something unreadable was behind his eyes. Obi wan looked back up at you before slowly leaning in. you could feel his breath on your lips and you closed your eyes.

suddenly you felt your lips touch softly. he cupped your face and his beard tickled against your skin. you had to turn your head slightly to completely capture his lips. it was as if he was kissing away all your pain and anxiety because suddenly you felt the warmth again, but this time it was more powerful.

that is until he pulled away. Obi wans forehead pressed against yours and he huffed lightly.

"what?" you asked quietly.

"nothing" he said with a smile. you smiled too and kissed him shortly. he let out a surprised noise when you pulled away.

"better now?" he asked.

"I think so" you nodded and fully pulled away. he smiled and went to get up.

"wait" you mumbled, "you can't leave now". you pouted lightly.

"and why not?" he joked.

"what if the nightmares come back" you matched his tone.

he thought for a moment, "hmm that's a good point" he said and sat back down. you scooted over for him and he laid beside you.

"thank you" you said.

"of course" he smiled again and tucked you into him.

and the nightmares never returned.

[cryinggarbagebag]

omg this is so good

padawan -> obi-wan kenobi {part one}

              ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

me: has a witcher series to finish which is taking a lot of time

also me: starts a new series about a character i’ve never written for before!

{also trying out a new layout? unsure of what i think of it}

summary: you’re hopelessly in love with anakin skywalker, but he only has eyes for padmé amidala. your heartbreak is starting to effect your performance in the jedi temple, and your position as padawan to obi-wan kenobi is in jeopardy.

pairings: obi-wan kenobi x reader {eventually}

warnings: none

               ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Keep reading

[cryinggarbagebag]

Hello Again (Sirius Blacks Daughter)

Requested by my friend at school :)

Warnings: crying, abandonment, profanity, denial the works :))

if i missed any pls let me know!

also if you would like to be added to my tags list let me know!

outfit suggestion ^^

.-.

something felt off about tonight and it wasn't for any ordinary reason, not because Dumbledore had asked for me to be at this Order meeting, it was because I found myself standing in front of my first home from before my father was incarcerated, and before I had been accepted into Hogwarts. I only assume that this has something to do with him. I had heard noise about Sirius Black being on the loose earlier this school year, and that caused everyone, and I mean everyone, to think I was hiding him or some shit. it eventually lead to me getting in a couple fights, some physical, and my uncle making the decision of letting me end the school year at home. I was greatful but also pissed off because I was always winning. I guess the med wing couldn't take as many kids as I was sending them. I'm a little aggressive but those fuckers deserved it for disrespecting my father like that! although I only met him as a baby (I was 4 when he was put into Azkaban), I feel like I have known him all my life. it could be through Uncle Remus' story telling, or the twinkle in any of my teachers eyes whenever they spoke of him, I think it's because of a bond only found in someone you truly love. like when Uncle Remus was having a stressful day at the school and I sent him chocolates by owl without him telling me first.

but anyways, the house was eerily familiar, and I subconsciously tucked my short black hair behind my ear nervously. Harry would also be arriving tonight but later on. the Weasleys were also staying there along with Hermione. I smiled at the thought of seeing my friends again as I knocked on the door. we had to use a specific pattern every time so that no death eaters or muggles could get in. I saw the door unlock and it slowly turned open to reveal Tonks. she had a thing for my uncle I guess... good for her.

"y/n! whatsit!"

"hi" I said as she enveloped me in a hug.

"might have to steal your jacket, it's nice" she complimented.

"maybe I'll loan it to you" I winked and made my way inside.

"everyone's in the kitchen" she said and grabbed my arm, "he's in there" she said quieter.

"who?" I asked with concern.

"Sirius. he's anxious to meet you" she said.

"oh" I replied, suddenly getting a strange wave of anxiety as well.

"are you ready?" she asked.

I swallowed thickly, "i- Tonks what if he abandons me again. I know it's not his fault but-"

"y/n don't worry. he loves you and he promised to never leave you again." she said reassuringly and pet my hair. "now, shoulders back, head high, you've got to show him that you truly are his spawn" she joked.

"don't say it like that" I said with a giggle.

"there we go, that's the carefree y/n I know. are you ready now?"

I looked at the door and took a deep breath before nodding. she lead me to it and pushed lightly on the oak wood. there was a long table, with people sitting around it, most of them were my friends, but at the far end was a man who looked just like me only older and with a beard. I froze. I couldn't think, it was too much, but it was too late to turn back.

I noticed uncle remus standing next to him, a timid smile on his face. it was silent, as if everyone had noticed the tension in the room. but then I looked at the ground and reminded myself that I am the daughter of Sirius Black, and I have to fit the role. I do fit the role.

so I cleared my throat, threw on a smirk and said "well, hello again" with as much confidence as I could muster.

when he didn't say anything Uncle Remus nudged him with his elbow as to say 'go on'.

he snapped back to reality and made his way around the table, standing a few feet away from me. he had tears in his eyes, not many but enough for me to know he cared.

"y/n" he started as Molly ushered the twins out of the room. once they were gone it was just me, Uncle Remus, Tonks and my father.

"y/n" he begun again, "my god you've grown. look at you. I feel so old now" he joked lightly, taking in my appearance.

I gave a grumbly laugh that barely made it out of my throat as I realized I was holding back tears too. it was harder to keep them to myself when I realized just how much I had missed him.

"sorry can I just-" I started and rose my arms in a hugging position. he didn't hesitate to bring me into a strong embrace. it was like a part of me that was lost had finally been found. the last puzzle piece had been put into place and I was complete. I let the tears fall then, and I could tell he did too.

once our cry fest was over I lightly pulled away, he heald me at an arms length and really examined my features.

"you're gorgeous just like your mother" he mumbled to himself rather than me.

I smiled wearily and looked down at my scarred knuckles, "so I've been told. they also say I'm your clone."

"I can see why. Remus said you've been getting into trouble lately" he smirked.

"only to defend my last name". I looked up at him and smiled.

"ah that's my girl" he said louder this time, and pride shown in his face. I felt a sense of warmth wash through my body and it was unlike anything I felt before.

"we'll let you two catch up" Uncle Remus said with a smile, putting his arm around Tonks and leading her out of the room. I watched them go before sitting in the seat next to me, Sirius following my lead.

"so, y/n.. tell me everything"

and so I did. I told him about my friends, about my school life, about everything and he listened with genuine interest. I told him about how the other people at school soiled our name, and how I had to leave because of it. he just smiled and laughed it off.

once I had given him my life's story, and everything had died down he leaned forward in his chair and took my hands

"y/n, I know I haven't been there for you, all your special moments and such but I hope you can accept me as your father. I don't ever want to leave you again like I did. I felt horrible for that. I'm hoping now that we can have the life I always wanted for us. me you and Remus that is."

"oh dad, don't feel bad. I know about everything. nothing was ever your fault. what's important is that you're here now."

"thank you" he said and pulled away, "now I'm sure you want to catch up with your friends, I won't keep you waiting" Sirius smiled.

[cryinggarbagebag]

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