cryptidstealingyourcreditcard

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i absolutely adore the headcanon that riz is just a total creature™️

like his ears move like a cat’s, depending on what he’s hearing and his emotions

his pupils dilate, also depending on his mood

he has sharp fangs and claws and a tail with a little tuft at the end

his tail helps him with balance and dexterity and he can use it to hold on to and move things, but it can’t support his whole body weight like a prehensile tail

he doesn’t have fur per se, but his body hair is very thin and soft and covers almost everywhere

he hisses and snarls and purrs and sometimes even chitters (the way cats do to imitate birds)

if he gets cold enough, he will enter a state of torpor (basically involuntary hibernation, but more short-term and easier to wake from)

idk i just love him

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thinking of how fig must’ve gone from elf-passing to a full tiefling

do you think her skin would’ve turned red in patches that slowly grew bigger until it covered all of her? do you think sandra lynn and gilear thought it was a medical condition? do you think fig scratched and scratched at the top of her head because it was so itchy and it hurt and no one knew why? do you think, when the horns started to grow in, they split the skin that she had scratched raw? do you think she woke up one day to find blood crusting around two small points above her hairline? do you think sandra lynn tried to style her hair to hide the horns until they got too big? do you think her horns grew quickly, half an inch or so a day? do you think they gave her splitting migraines? do you think her tail sprouted even faster? do you think it completely threw off her balance? do you think she had to quit cheer because she could barely walk in a straight line without tripping? do you think her skin began to thicken, more so than elves’ paper-like skin? do you think sharp fangs grew in under her teeth and pushed them out like baby teeth? do you think she felt like she was teething again? do you think the whole process was over in a mere couple of weeks? do you think do you think do you think-

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thinking about the Bad Kids sharing clothes. like

- gorgug’s hoodie is basically a communal hoodie at this point (everyone is seen wearing it at some point) (it’s like. a dress on riz)

- adaine has a scarf that everyone likes to steal because it’s so soft (fig showed ayda a picture of boggy wrapped in it and ayda cried. real tears)

- the girls + riz love to steal fabian’s muscle tees (they don’t fit gorgug) (fabian buys one that’s way too big for him so that gorgug can steal it) (he pretends not to realize that it’s way bigger than his other tees) (cause he’s embarrassed that he did something nice) (the others clock it immediately but pretend they don’t for fabian’s sake)

- kristen has the ugliest socks (the kind that go around each toe like gloves) but they’re so comfortable (everyone’s ashamed to be seen wearing them) (but they’re so soft and warm and they might be enchanted??? no one knows) (if someone is seen wearing them they just exchange grim white-boy-tight-lipped-awkward-look-away nods and don’t say anything about it)

- riz has a scarily large assortment of hats that no one’s ever seen him in (no one knows why, or how, he got them) (they’re in every hat style imaginable) (usually one of the Kids will just borrow a beanie, but kristen has tried a cowboy hat on occasion) (it was slapped off of her head immediately)

- fig has tried to make her leather jacket a communal jacket like gorgug’s, but it “doesn’t fit anyone else’s aesthetic” so instead she always has a pair of (not fingerless) gloves with her in case anyone gets cold

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it’s freshman year. you think that fig angsty-rebellious-punk-rock-broken-home-half-devil faeth would be the most batshit crazy. you are wrong. it is kristen summer-camp-counselor-cleric-chosen-prophet-of-helio applebees.

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hey guys friendly reminder that fig tried to cover for, and subsequently take the fall for, adaine stealing that book on the first day of school despite not knowing her at all beforehand

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✨chej✨

i know i’ve posted this before but im posting it again cause i love how it turned out

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headcanon that the rest of the Bad Kids clock fabian’s blindspot after his right eye gets taken out and immediately start doing little things to help

like grouping to his left so he can see them all, or moving things when his depth perceptions a lil off, or making sure people don’t come up on his right and take him by surprise

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freshman year riz vs junior year riz who will win

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sometimes a friend group is the adopted friend passively looking for their bio dad, the child-of-an-affair friend actively looking for their bio dad, the friend with a dead dad, the friend with a borderline emotionally unstable and highly pressuring dad, the friend who got disowned by their radical cult member dad, and the friend with a blatantly neglectful and abusive dick dad.

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lil doodles of the Kids™️

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OH AND RIZ GOT THAT VIDEO OF BIZ DANCING OR WHATEVER THE FUCK HE WAS DOING IN THE ARCADE

can we take a sec to talk about the Bad Kids digital footprint. because like

fig: was a popular cheerleader in middle school, then a rebellious teenager who probably had at least one viral twitter thread, then became a world famous rockstar, and was revealed to be the daughter of a very high ranking devil

kristen: literally the chosen prophet of a very well known and worshipped god, died and renounced helio, created her own god, then later renounced that god as well

adaine: the child of very prestigious and important high elves, then the literal oracle, and killed the lunch lady on the very first day of school

gorgug: at first a nobody, but then becomes the drummer for a world famous rock band, as well as a star athlete on the owlbears bloodrush team, and then an expert artificer, not to mention the fact that he consistently kicks ass

fabian: the son of bill fucking seacaster, conventionally attractive and very very rich, another star athlete on the owlbears bloodrush team, killed toxic masculinity, and dances now

riz: notoriously weird, one of very few (if not the only) goblin in aguefort (if not in all of elmville), the youngest licensed private investigator probably in all of solace, not to mention the fact that he actually ate kalvaxus, and now works with angel fbi agents

and then they post a viral video with a tabaxi that only some people could see, then a viral livestream of all of these children absolutely wasted and having a crustacean-themed rager, and then another viral livestream of them in the fucking forest of the nightmare king battling the nightmare king himself and the previously mentioned tabaxi where some of those actual children literally fucking. DIE.

like what the fuck that’s so wild what

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headcanon that riz likes to wrap his tail around his friends’ legs, just as some casual affection. the only problem is that half the time they forget that riz’s tail is there and try to walk and inevitably end up eating shit

(he doesn’t do it to kristen because he knows she’ll forget and will absolutely 100% fucking die)

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headcanon that the Bad Kids full name each other when they’re angry

fig becomes figueroth

fabian becomes fabian aramais (they don’t add seacaster because fabian loves to boast his name)

adaine actually gets shortened to addie?

gorgug becomes gorbag for some reason??? it took him a while to catch on and he was really confused as to why they were calling him his bio dad’s name

kristen becomes kristen chilis applebees (or shortened to KCA)

riz becomes any variation of rizbert, erizabeth, rizolothew, rizgueroth, etc.

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aromantic allosexual adaine and alloromantic asexual riz anyone?

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riz’s disdain-turned-hatred of biz is so fucking funny

reference pic:

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young sklonda gukgak was 1000% a menace to society

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oh gorgug’s tin flower shoulder tattoo you are so special to me