cyraslair

[cyraslair]

i cry every time they sleep before i do. because they're the only one i wanna talk to at night and i don't wanna be lonely i don't

[cyraslair]

would they like me more if i was prettier? i try so hard to be pretty i do my hair every day and wear nice clothes why am i not pretty thr way other people are pretty

[cyraslair]

i wish they'd just say they hate me cause i know they do

[cyraslair]

i feel like someone dead pretending to be alive

[cyraslair]

why does loving people feel so guttural and painful for me? i just want to love without feeling every ounce of emotion to my core.

it’s becoming more and more difficult to find reasons to stay.

my existence is torture.

[cyraslair]

Why tf was I born ugly?

[cyraslair]

will i be remembered as good or a monster

[cyraslair]

[cyraslair]

when you feel so empty and desperately hope that something will come along to fill the void

[cyraslair]

Can’t it be over already, please

[cyraslair]

Still in disbelief two days ago i couldve kms and only two people cared . Two . After so much ive done && time ive spent with these people 2 cared ???

Maybe its my fault because im always jokey and most things i say arent srs . Do i need to put a damn tone tag after everything . Do i need a gun to my head live 4k to get people to say anything .

Clearly . Regardless i blocked them . I now know who isn't and is my friend ^ _ ^

[cyraslair]

[cyraslair]

I always think I hit rock bottom and then I sink even lower and realize there is no bottom, it just keeps going down.

[cyraslair]

i’m fighting a war within my head that i don’t want to fight anymore it’s so exhausting and no one understands

[cyraslair]

Can I please stop waking up

[cyraslair]

i am so tired of everything around me. if there's a way i could vanish without an explanation, i would.

[cyraslair]

im so convinced i was some kind of really bad person in my past life and my current life is my punishment for what ive done