dear-yunho

[dear-yunho]

Broken Glass

Pairing : Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader Genre : ANGST !!!  Word count : 515 Warnings - mentions of cheating, pain / borderline abusive actions  * A/n - This was literally just written on the spur of the moment, sometimes I do very short ones to sort of find my motivation back - this is a product of that. I want to make it very clear this is not at all a healthy scenario nor is it any indication of how I view Yunho. Simply some rubbish that came out of my brain. *

“Who do you think you are?” Yunho’s grip was unnecessarily and surprisingly tight around your wrists, and with every word it only seemed to tighten, until you were hissing under your breath and wincing. He was angry, he was upset, you could see every turbulent emotion in his eyes as he stared at you, completely oblivious to the pain he was causing. 

Without a doubt, you had gotten yourself into this situation. There was nobody else you could blame but you, and both of you knew that in this moment. You’d made mistakes that you couldn’t unmake and you were watching the consequences of it ripping your boyfriend apart in front of your tear-filled eyes. “What went through your mind that would make you think cheating on me was a good idea?” Yunho groaned, every word ending on a tremor. His grip loosened and you took advantage of it, wrestling out of his too big hands, hands that had only days ago caressed you with so much care. He had every right to be upset, and you had none. And yet still you felt a tiny flame of indignation at his question, as if he had no blame to play in this scenario. “Yunho you broke up with me!” You reminded him with a tight voice lacking the control you’d hoped it would have, rising a few octaves higher than normal. “What did you expect me to do? Just sit around and cry!?” He was still for a moment, staring up at the ceiling, though you were positive he wasn’t actually seeing it at all. All he was seeing was fire and pain. “Yes.” He finally uttered, looking back down at you with tears now shining in his eyes too. “How many times have we had fights that end in breakups? We always come back to each other, we always wait..” He was right, you knew that. So you didn’t know how to explain to him that this time the pain had been too much, that despite knowing he would come back to you when he had cooled down, you still ran into the arms of a longtime friend, finding the wrong kinds of comfort in them. It not been your intention to cheat on him, to hurt both of you like this, to break what was already so very broken. It had just happened. But you couldn’t say those things to him, how could he understand that when he had never even considered turning to someone else for comfort? “I’m sorry.” The words fell like broken glass, ripping parts of you out with them as they fell into the space between you, offering neither of you any kind of relief or solace. The tears finally released from his eyes, flooding down his cheeks and you wanted to fall to your knees and keen out in pain because he shouldn’t be crying, never because of you. Instead you did the only thing you knew to do, the only thing you had ever done when you’d done something irreparably wrong. You turned and you left. 

[dear-yunho]

stay on tumblr pls 💐 make friends on here so it's easier to come back to or something 💫 Pls,, I like your writing a lot 💕 and pretty much only use Tumblr to read ff✨ PLS 😣😣 I don't wanna sound selfish but 😔

🥺Hello! Thankyou so much for this, it truly made me feel so appreciated! Don’t worry, I definitely won’t ever leave Tumblr and I will continue to write. I go through periods of struggling to write and then I’ll go through a phase where I’ll write non stop and get out a lot of content. I’m starting to feel like I’m finally ready to write again too so hopefully you’ll see more from me soon ;3 again thankyou so much for saying you like my writing it means so much to me, truly!!! 💕

[dear-yunho]

For real I think I have commitment issues, can’t keep up with my tumblr, my twitter or my Wattpad 😩🙏🏻 we wont even talk about my relationships.

[dear-yunho]

🥺👉👈 hi,, how have you been? imy 💕😣

Hello 🥺 I’ve been,, okayyy. Things go up and down always no matter what I do but things are doing okay right now ❤️ WHO ARE YOUUUUUU, WHOEVER YOU ARE IMYT!!!!!

[dear-yunho]

Coffee

Pairing : Kang Yeosang (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader

Genre : Fluff Word Count : 1741

You weren’t particularly fond of the way that the boy lounged at the far end of the cafe had been eyeing you curiously from the moment you sat down a few hours ago.

You were even less fond of how blatant he made it, barely shifting his gaze even when one of his taller friends jostled against him to catch his attention. The last thing you wanted or needed today was a distraction like a pair of immensely attractive eyes belonging to an even more attractive guy, following every tiny movement you made, right down to the embarrassing moment that you dozed off momentarily, jaw slamming painfully down onto the table below you. You didn’t bother to look up and check if anyone had seen the moment, you could feel his eyes still boring into you and the heavy silence that filled the now essentially empty cafe meant that even if he hadn’t been watching, he would have at the very least heard the sharp thud of your jawbone on the flat wooden surface. Your gaze glanced wistfully to the empty cup in front of you, the bottom of the white ceramic still covered in a few, long cold, dregs of coffee grit. Cold or not, you were tempted to force the miniscule amount of liquid back in an attempt to beat the fatigue weighting your mind and body down. You were still deciding when you felt a sudden shift in the atmosphere around you and a shadow fell over your table, making you look reluctantly up. You had your suspicions long before your neck arched and tilted backwards to take in the person standing in front of your table, but your eyebrows still arched in surprise, no disbelief, despite knowing what you were in store for. “It’s not enough to stalk me all day from the other side of the cafe then?” You scoffed, crossing your arms in front of you on the table and giving the attractive guy your best glare. You suspected by the vaguely amused grin on his petite mouth that it wasn’t at all having the intended affect on him. “I wanted to introduce myself.” He said, instead of apologising for making you uncomfortable for a ridiculously long amount of time. You couldn’t even fathom why he’d spent the whole day in here, you at least had the excuse of needing somewhere quiet to study, but in the whole four hours that you’d been here doing just that, he hadn’t so much as pulled out a book. Of any kind. “What if I’m not interested in being introduced to you?” You retorted, keeping your face carefully blank of as many emotions as you could manage. “You are interested.” He said simply, deep voice somehow managing to be raspy and soft all at once as he effortlessly tugged back the chair opposite you and sat himself in it. You gaped, almost unable to believe what was happening. “Well I’m not, I have things to do, so please leave me alone.” You lifted your book pointedly, letting it slam back down onto the desk to further reinforce your words. Unfortunately for you, the book wasn’t quite heavy enough to make a dramatic sound and the guy barely seemed to notice, his expression remaining neutral as he watched you intently. You were about ready to stand and leave when he finally spoke, leaning forward onto his elbows as if he’d never been more interested in his own words before. “You’ve been reading the same page of that book for the last hour and a half and you’ve barely written anything on that piece of paper.” He gestured, palm flat, at the mostly empty piece of paper that you’d been attempting to fill and then the book you’d attempted to scare him off with, eyes narrowed. “So I don’t exactly think I’m interrupting anything but please do correct me if I’m wrong.” If there had of been some kind of smug or cocky way to his words, or even a coldness to his expression, you might have been able to scoff at him and tell him in not so many nice words to get away from you. But blank expression on his face had slipped up somewhat, revealing a shimmer of lonliness in his dark orbs that tugged, hard, on your heartstrings. So you closed the book and turned your gaze curiously on him, giving him your attention and earning a pleased semi smile for it. You couldn’t imagine how much more attractive he looked when he smiled a full smile, but it was a surprise that he didn’t have an armful of girls hanging off his every breath with a face like that and a smile that could probably put models to shame. “What do you want?” You asked warily, cupping your chin in your hands and staring at him some more, taking in the sharp angles of his jaw and soft roundness of his cheeks accompanied by wide, deep dark pools of eyes that seemed to tug you endlessly in and down into them. If his hair weren’t styled so cutely, all curls at the top and straight at the sides, he would have been an intimidating sight. But he was still intimidating, and he was still too attractive to even be looking at someone like you, let alone engaging in flirtatious conversation with you. “To buy you another coffee so you don’t fall asleep talking to me.” He hummed, eyes darting between your face and the empty cup that you’d been contemplating further emptying a few moments ago. “I’ll probably still fall asleep.” You quipped at him, narrowing your eyes in a half hearted glare, nothing alike the first effort you’d made when he approached earlier. He grinned, almost seeming to revert into a child for a moment. “Let me buy you one anyway.” He insisted, leaning back in his chair again and watching you for a sign of agreement. You paused, bottom lip tugged under your teeth as you contemplated his offer. You weren’t a complete idiot, despite the pure impossibility of it, this guy was clearly interested in you and if you agreed to let him buy you a coffee then there were a thousand different ways that things could progress. And if you declined, you were pretty certain he’d get up and walk away, and that would be the end of your brief interactions. He’d either go back to watching you from afar or he’d just leave altogether. You’d never see or hear from him again. Maybe. You picked up the pen that you’d been using earlier to write out sentences onto your page, twirling it around your fingers while you considered everything. “What’s in it for you?” You finally spoke, looking up and making eye contact with him. He looked somewhat surprised at the question, tilting his head to the side as he thought about how to answer. Or maybe he was just considering the best way to make an escape now that you were showing a semblance of interest. “A chance at something that isn’t controlled by my company, a relationship that I get to decide that I want, rather than somebody else deciding for me.” His voice is quiet, although no matter how quiet he was, the emotion searing behind the words he spoke were loud and clear. For a moment you were so entranced by it that you nearly missed an important part of his sentence. You sat straighter, somehow even warier now than you had been moments ago. “Company?” At your guarded question his face almost seemed to crumple, any hope he’d had glimmering in his eyes moments ago chased away by the realisation of some mistake. He fumbled to explain, clearly thinking faster than his mouth could keep up with. “Yeah, well it’s not big and, well I mean I’m not big, we aren’t. It’s nothing-” You lifted a hand, indicating for him to stop which he did with a grateful hang of his dark haired head. “You’re a trainee?” You asked, suddenly understanding his ridiculously good looks and quiet demanour a bit better. He grimaced, seeming to hesitate to disagree or elaborate and your eyebrows lifted. “An idol..” At that he nodded reluctantly, looking away from you, the tips of his somewhat pointed ears reddening. If he didn’t look so terrified, you might have snorted and told him you didn’t believe him. “Wow.” You muttered aloud, leaning right back in your seat. What the hell. “This is really not how I wanted to introduce myself.” He mumbled, glancing back at you shyly. You nodded, understanding despite the spinning of your head. Of course, why would he want to reveal that to someone unnecessarily, why risk that you could use any of your interactions with him against him or his company. Not that you would, you couldn’t care less whether he was an idol, although now if you accepted his drink offer it was going to seem a lot like you were doing it only because you’d figured out he  was an idol. Which again, you could care less about. And suddenly, although the air felt thick with awkwardness, he shoved his small hand out over the tabletop towards you, his eyes once again locking onto yours with a whole new level of intensity. “Let’s start again. My name is Kang Yeosang, I’m an idol in a group called Ateez, who you’ve clearly never heard about before because you didn’t recognise me, which is why I’ve been staring at you all day and finally worked up the courage to come over here and tell you that I’ve seen you around here so many times I feel like I already know you.” You balked, hand lifting limply to his and letting him grip it, his lips curving slightly upward in a hopeful smile. “And I’m really not normally so forward around new people, much less cute girls, but I really do want to get to know you.” He added as a quick afterthought, his smooth fingers squeezing yours lightly as if encouraging you to say something, or do something more than just gawk at him. You blinked, struggling to pull yourself and your thoughts together. “I’m…” Overwhelmed. In disbelief that someone so cute and famous was interested in you. Nowhere in his league. Not even the same realm. Totally head over heels for that smile. “Y/n. It’s nice to meet you Yeosang.”

[dear-yunho]

YOUR WRITING IS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. I love it so much. I'm so emotional rn bc like your angst is *chef's kiss* ughhhhhhhhhhhhh bless 🤎💙😘❤️🧡🥰❤️😘💚😘❤️🥰❤️

This made me UWU so hARD, thankyou so so so so much. Getting little comments like this makes me so soft and happy, it’s what motivates me to continue to write. I love you so much uwu <3

[dear-yunho]

For You

Pairing : Choi Jongho (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader Genre : Fluff Word Count : 1,994 Author’s Note : Writing for Jongho is always difficult for me! Hopefully you enjoy this! 

“Okay, Jongho you know that Y/n can see you right?” San’s voice whispered way too loudly into the room, causing the other members to let out snickers as the youngest’ head popped up from his hiding spot behind Mingi’s broad shoulders. You fixed him with a glare, arms crossed tightly over your chest as he stood up slowly and meekly. “Jongho’s in trouble.” Yunho teased, his smile lighting up his face as he stared between you and Jongho like he was watching the world’s funniest reality show. You supposed for them it was pretty funny, though for you the fact that Jongho had been hiding from you behind his friend meant that he wasn’t actually looking forward to seeing you. You couldn’t entirely blame him, you’d been a mess a lot lately and he was overwhelmed with comeback preparations, but you’d wanted to surprise him for once.

He picked his way through his friends to your side, casting you a somewhat curious stare when you didn’t explode into angry yelling but turned and left the room silently. Tears welled in your eyes as you made your way for the front door, barely hearing his footsteps pattering after you, nor his concerned call until your hand was on the door handle and his was clasping over it, preventing you from opening the door. “Y/n?” For someone who danced intense and physically demanding choreographies everyday, he sounded quite out of breath from a short run from one end of the hall to the other. You closed your eyes tightly, willing away the tell tale shine of tears in your eyes and telling yourself to pull it together. You were monumentally over reacting, he’d likely just been trying to joke around and you’d let it get to you unnecessarily. You knew that… And yet your heart still hurt at the very idea that he would dread seeing you enough to actually hide. “Hey, look at me.” He said quietly, tugging gently but forcibly at your hand until you turned to look at him. You knew instantly by the crestfallen look on his handsome face that you’d failed at not wearing your feelings on your face. “I’m sorry, I was just kidding, you know that right?” He sighed, reaching out to place his hand against your cheek for a moment. Your lips puckered in a half pout half grimace as you struggled desperately to contain the oncoming flow of tears. You didn’t want to be the kind of girlfriend that cried over something stupid, nor did you want to be the girlfriend who needed constant reassurance. That was a quick way to ruin a relationship and dissolve any trust between you. But it had been a long week and you had just wanted to come and see your boyfriend for some comfort. With little warning the dam broke and tears began to flow down your cheeks in twin rivers, little sniffles escaping you.  The harder you tried to stop them, the more hiccups built up in the back of your throat as Jongho stared at you helplessly, unsure of what to do to help you. “Y/n.” He said, folding you into his embrace and resting his cheek against your forehead, murmuring soft words of comfort into your ear. “I’m sorry.” You finally managed to gasp out when you were in better control of your emotions, trying to pull yourself away from him. But he held fast, arms far too strong for you to even bother attempting again to seperate yourselves; if he wanted to hold you then you weren’t going anywhere. “You don’t need to apologise, I do.” He sighed, letting you free of his arms but keeping one hand on your right shoulder while his other lifted to cup your face, thumb swiping away the drying trail of tears on your cheeks. You’d never seen him look so heartbroken. You hated it. “You did nothing wrong, Jongho.” You rushed to tell him, needing desperately to explain to him but not knowing how. How could you explain the things going on inside your head without scaring him off? He watched you, an understanding in his gaze that very nearly had you in tears again, your heart thumping unevenly in your chest. “I shouldn’t have hidden from you.” “You were just kidding around.” “I was, but it still upset you.” You sighed softly, this could go on for hours, you were pretty sure both of you could easily continue to find things to blame on yourselves, but that wouldn’t make things any better. “You mean the world to me, you know that right?” He said softly, holding your eyes with his in a way that both made you want to melt and cower at the same time. Everything about Choi Jongho exuded power and stability, whereas you always seemed to manage to look tiny and insignificant in any situation. You bit hard on your lip, hoping that would stop it from trembling. When you didn’t reply to him his thumb stilled its swiping motion against your cheek, his eyebrows furrowing a little. “Will you come with me?” He asked suddenly, dropping his hand from your face cautiously, as if by letting you go you would simply crumble at his feet. Determined to prove that fear wrong you jutted your jaw out, very nearly smashing your head into his. “Where?” Any facade you might have momentarily built about being the strong one disappeared when you spoke in a weak voice that shoot around every syllable. Jongho simply smiled, grabbing your hand and gently pulling you along behind him as he tracked his way back down to the room that you’d walked into earlier, where all his band mates were waiting with barely concealed curiosity in exactly the places they’d been sitting earlier. “Hongjoong,” Jongho spun to face his leader, subsequently bringing you further into the room, earning a toothy grin from Mingi when you grimaced at being forced into the very small space left in the centre for your body. Hongjoong raised an eyebrow, nodding at Jongho, as if a whole conversation had passed between them while you were distracted by Wooyoung muttering something into San’s ear. You were pretty sure that neither Jongho or Hongjoong had actually spoken to each other though and your confusion reached new heights when Hongjoong leapt nimbly to his feet and exited the room, gesturing both you and Jongho after him. The sounds of the member’s talking in quiet voices followed all three of you for a few moments before you were being pulled into a whole new part of the dorms that you’d either never been in or just never noticed existed before now. The closest thing it was comparable to was a small studio, the walls lined with foam that you figured would have something to do with keeping the sound in, and a mic hung over Hongjoong’s infamous laptop which was open, as per usual, on his music app. “Sit.” Hongjoong said to you sternly, pointing at a row of chairs on the far side of the room. You threw Jongho a confused look when his fingers untangled from yours and he moved towards Hongjoong, giving you a soft nod. “Y/n, sit.” Hongjoong repeated, less stern this time, his eyes softening when your gaze followed your boyfriend’s figure. “I’m going to explain what’s going on to you in a second but you should be sitting when you hear it.” His words sent a shiver of worry through you and before you knew it you were stumbling back onto the edge of one of the seats, fingers clasped over the edge of it where your legs weren’t, feet crossed below you. Your knee bounced to an imaginary beat and you were pretty sure that sweat was beginning to bead on the back of your neck. “Calm down.” Jongho murmured from beside Hongjoong, his eyes darting between your bouncing leg and your tight facial expression. His hand lifted to his chest, resting above his heart, the light above him twinkling like stars in the glassy reflection of his eyes. It was something he’d started doing for you when you first met him, before you were ever anything more than just the water girl at Ateez’s first photoshoot, coincidentally that had also been your first photoshoot. Throughout the day he’d watched you, picking up on your nervous ticks. And somehow he’d known even then that the sound of a heartbeat, whether yours or someone else’s, would calm you down. So mid photoshoot, right on the brink of your oncoming panic attack, he’d lifted his hand and pressed it to his chest, dark eyes grabbing yours captive until the panic seeped out of you. It had stuck, somehow seeing him touch his heart was as calming to you now as it had been the first time. Your breathing evened out and your leg slowed it’s irritable pace. Hongjoong watched you both through narrowed eyes until he felt that you were calm enough to hear his next words. He nodded once at Jongho then reached behind him and touched a few keys on his laptop, sending a soothingly beautiful melody from the speakers that were positioned just perfectly above the row of seats to completely encase you in the sounds. “Jongho came to me about two months ago,” Hongjoong started, wandering over to sit down beside you, glancing over to make sure you were still listening to him. Your eyes were fixed on Jongho, who was smiling, the tips of his ears slightly red. “because he wanted help finding a way to tell you how he felt about you.” Your mouth dropped open slightly, your neck twisting harshly to take your eyes to Hongjoong’s face. He gave you an amused smile, tilting his head a little. “He wanted to do something that he could have complete input in, that he could tell you in a way that perfectly matched who he is.” You looked back over at Jongho, who was rubbing the back of his neck, his eyes now on the ceiling as if suddenly realising his situation. His ears continued to redden while his cheeks paled somewhat, drawing a short giggle from you. “He’s not the best at words,” Hongjoong chuckled, earning a brief glare from his maknae. “but most of what you’re about to hear was entirely Jongho’s words. I just rearranged them and plucked around with a few things. He even helped me create the melody.” Pride surged in your chest, filling your eyes with a fresh bout of tears. This time though, they were happy ones. Jongho opened his mouth and began to sing, his voice, as strong as the rest of him, flowing like molten honey into your ears. Your heart had never felt so full and happy as it did now. By the time Jongho was done, his chest rising and falling a little from his long notes, Hongjoong’s presence had disappeared from beside you, the door shutting firmly behind him. “Jongho.” You whispered, standing immediately and dashing to him. He opened his arms, folding you against him, his face nuzzling into your neck. “Y/n, I really hope you..” He took a deep breath, his arms tightening a little around your body. “understood what I was trying to tell you.” You smiled into his chest, leaning back to look up at him. You weren’t at all prepared for the look of pure adoration in his dark eyes, or the soft smile on his lips that you’d never seen on him before, a smile that seemed to somehow light up every single feature on his face. You weren’t prepared for the way the sight made your heart falter and stutter in your chest or the way your breath caught in your throat. But you meant the words that flowed effortlessly out of your lips, curved up in a smile that matched his. “I love you too.”

[dear-yunho]

Comfort

Pairing : Jung Wooyoung (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader Genre : Fluff Word Count : 849 Author’s Note : This is a much shorter one than my normal! And please if you have any requests then feel free to give them to me! I love writing for others! :3

You followed the sounds of lighthearted arguing down the corridor, poking your head around the corner of the kitchen to see San waving his arms around in Wooyoung’s face. Wooyoung normally held his cool well in front of San, or anyone really, but you’d never seen him look so close to snapping at his best friend as he did now. His hands were clenched in tight fists at his side, eyes flashing with irritation as San went on about some off handed comment that Wooyoung had made during a recent interview. Your heart panged sympathetically for Wooyoung when San’s voice cracked and his head dropped, hands clasping tightly in front of him. You knew as well as everyone else that Wooyoung adored San, would do anything for him. But his ability to handle San’s exuberant personality on top of the things that went on in his own head sometimes fell short of Sannie’s expectations. Quietly you slipped in between them, placing your hands around San’s wrists gently. “San.” You said softly, urging him to look up at you. After a moment he lifted his head, pouting at you wordlessly. He knew that he’d gone too far, got too far into Wooyoung’s space, but he never knew how to stop, how to get himself out. You pouted back, ruffling his long hair to lighten the mood. “Maybe you should go find Seonghwa.” You suggested lightly, smiling reassuringly at him to let him know that you’d look after Wooyoung. He paused, eyes flickering once to his friend’s stony expression before nodding with a small ‘okay’ and leaving the room. You waited a few moments, taking a deep breath to steel yourself, before turning to face Wooyoung. The irritation and exasperation had fled his expression, leaving behind an exhausted and guilty husk. “I didn’t mean to upset him.” He said quietly, staring after San’s retreating figure down the hall. You slipped your hand into his, squeezing it and earning a grateful glance from Woo. “I know, so does he. Seonghwa will look after him.” You promised him, moving to stand in front of him, smiling sweetly at him. His distracted gaze switched back to you, allowing you to claim his attention. An easy smile returned to you and he nodded, dark hair fanning out across his forehead. It was one of the rare times you got to see him with his hair down and unstyled, the normal part in it almost completely nonexistent. You couldn’t help throwing him a look filled with adoration, fingers reaching out to brush a strand from above his eyes. Wooyoung chuckled, his eyes crinkling and hands capturing yours before they could drop back to your hand. His palm was warm around your fingers and his thumb stroked soothing circles on the back of your hand, the way he knew you loved. He knew a lot of little things about you. Like that sometimes the only way you could sleep was if you had a pillow cuddled against your chest and his arms around your waist. Or that you always ate your vegetables before you ate anything else on your plate. Or that you rarely ate a desert, no matter what it was, without a small spoon. Even if a larger one was more practical. And he knew that you loved the sound of rain in the morning even more than you loved him singing you to sleep. “You’re so cute.” He mumbled without meaning to as he stared at you, lost in a thousand thoughts and a million different reasons that he loved you. Your cheeks tinged red and you looked away to hide the blush, biting your lip shyly. You’d been with him for almost a year now, and yet every compliment he gave you still made your heart beat at twice its normal speed. A tiny giggle escaped him at your reaction and he peppered your cheek with kisses. “Stop.” You whined, batting him away with a smile, covering your cheeks in an effort to hide your more intense blushing. This only made him grin more, swinging his arms out to draw you against his chest. “Stop what?” He poked your side gently as you struggled in his grip. He wasn’t using much of his strength to keep you there, but non the less you knew there was no way that even using all of your own strength you’d find your way out. “Wooyoung I swear!” You screeched out when his pokes turned into light tickles, tearing gasps from you. He laughed over you, mercilessly continuing to tickle you, purely because the sound of your laughter made his heart swell like a balloon with happiness. When he finally stopped you didn’t have the energy to even attempt to get him back, opting for leaning all your weight on him instead. “I hate you.” You muttered, snaking your arms around his waist and burying your head into his shoulder. He just smiled, kissing the top of your head. He knew as well as you did that you couldn’t hate him even if you truly wanted to.

[dear-yunho]

Date Night

Pairing : Kim Hongjoong (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader Genre : Mostly Fluff/Comfort Word Count : 2,310 Author’s Note : This is the first Joongie fic I wrote that I was happy with! 

The smell of popcorn seemed to stick physically to you as you and Hongjoong left the theatre, and pieces of it were actually literally stuck on parts of Hongjoong where an overexcited child had thrown the remainder of their card box box of buttery kernels at him. You couldn’t help letting loose a tiny giggle at the memory of his stunned expression as the mother hurried her child away, throwing a rushed apology over her shoulder. “What?” Hongjoong looked at you, completely unaware that there were still pieces left on him, “Hold still.” You told him, reaching out to pluck the offending food from him and showing him the small pile in your hands before dumping it into the nearest bin. He pouted, hands patting the rest of him to ensure there were none left. “It’s not funny, stop laughing at me!” He exclaimed, pout growing the longer you continued to struggle to hold in giggles. You bit down hard on your lip, filling your eyes with an apology to ease his lost puppy look. “It’s a little funny.” You choked out when he finally smiled back at you and he glared for a moment before grabbing you around the waist and crushing you in a one armed hug while his free hand danced against your sides. “Is it still funny?” He questioned gloatingly as you gasped against him, trying not to laugh at the tickling he was torturing you with. “Hongjoong!” You whined, slapping his arm gently until he stopped, grinning widely down at you now. “Sorry princess.” He chuckled, kissing you quickly and softly before pulling away and inspecting you with adoration in his eyes that made your knees weak. This was the first time in weeks that you’d been able to see him, his schedule had been so crazy and you’d wanted to give him space to deal with that without worrying about you, but you hadn’t realised just how much you’d missed him. You stood on your toes, mouth seeking his in a kiss that lasted only a few seconds longer than the last. He held your waist, smiling against your lips. He’d missed you too. After a few more kisses that you were sure would probably have people gagging at the sight of if they were wandering past, you realised the time. It was getting dark, and you had things to get done at home, because although it was Hongjoong’s day off, it wasn’t yours. And you’d already left it too late, you’d be up well into the early morning struggling to meet your deadline for a work assignment that was due in tomorrow. “Mm I need to go.” You told Hongjoong, squeezing his hands and stepping away from him. His face fell in dismay and he followed your steps back, hands catching yours. “Let me walk you home at least?” He begged, mouth twisting sadly when you began to shake your head before he was even done speaking. You tugged your hands from his, catching his face gently between them and kissing him one last time. “If you walk me home, I’ll let you come in and spend the night and I won’t get any work done.” You pointed out, giving him a small smile that he half heartedly returned. Being the leader of his group, you knew that he understood what you were saying. But that didn’t make it any easier for him, or for you. “I could help you.” He offered, already knowing your response even as the words left his lips. “You helping would be a distraction in itself.” You giggled, running your fingers through his hair, amazed that it felt so soft and silky still, even though it had just recently been dyed red. The colour suited him, bringing out the delicate features of his face and accentuating the natural blush that often sported his face when he was with you. “Okay, Okay.” He agreed finally, pulling you into a bone crushing hug, his chin pressed to the top of your head as it rested against his shoulder. You sunk into him, allowing yourself a moment to be encased in his arms, in the warmth of his body against yours. “Go now because if you don’t then I’m not letting you go.” He mumbled into your hair, squeezing you somehow tighter. You buried your head deeper against his shoulder for a moment, sighing softly against him. If it were possible to freeze a moment forever, this would be the perfect one to keep in your heart. With a lot of willpower you managed to force yourself out of his arms, chewing your lip as you weighed the cost of putting off your work further.

As much as you loved Hongjoong, and you did, even the night with him wasn’t worth the outcome that you’d suffer for not getting the assignment done. “I’m going now.” You informed him, smiling when he chuckled at you, his eyes shimmering in the moonlight that was beaming down on you. “Be safe, go straight home.” He told you, lifting his hand in a tiny wave that nearly had you running back into his arms. Instead you nodded, as if you’d be going anywhere but straight home. The hardest thing you’d ever had to do was turn around and start walking in the direction of your apartment. Every step felt like you were dragging a bag full of bricks behind you and you refused to turn and check behind you until you knew you’d walked far enough that you couldn’t possibly still see Hongjoong with the romantically lit up theatre entrance behind him. Suddenly the air seemed colder without his bubbly presence beside you and you shoved your hands deep into your pockets, seeking the warmth, and focused on hurrying your steps up. You ached to be at home, bundled up in bed with your laptop in front of you working on your assignment and occasionally messaging Hongjoong with updates. You were halfway there when you noticed the sounds of footsteps echoing softly between yours.

Immediately your heart sped up and the hair on the back of your neck stood up as you resisted the desire to take off at a run. Every cautionary lesson ever on being followed in the middle of the night on an empty street the victim gave in to their flight desire, only encouraging the pursuer into the chase. But things were much easier discussed in a safe classroom in the middle of daylight hours than they were acted out. After a few minutes the footsteps got heavier and closer, and faster and you swallowed heavily, fingers wrapping around your phone in your pocket. Really you should have pulled it out long ago to call someone, but a part of you figured that the moment whoever was behind you saw the phone they’d pounce. It could just be someone else walking home. You tried to convince yourself, fingers clenching and unclenching around your phone. It would be so much easier to believe that, but if you were wrong then believing that for too long was what could get you attacked. The decision was made for you when a hard grip captured your elbow, spinning you forcefully around to face a man that had to be at least twice your age, and definitely highly intoxicated. Terror trilled through you and you scrambled to loosen his grip, bringing your phone out and attempting to unlock it one handed. “Come on love, no need to struggle.” The man drawled, smirking in a way that made your skin crawl and your heart race in the complete opposite way that Hongjoong made it race. Hongjoong, you’d give anything to go back and ask him to walk you home now. “Let me go, you asshole.” You hissed at the drunk, trying your best to ignore how painful his grip on you was becoming as you twisted desperately in an effort to escape. If you could free yourself you figured you’d easily outrun him, hell even fast walking would probably throw him off, but he was twice your height and even drunk much stronger than you would ever be. “Nawh come on, there’s no need to struggle.” He repeated, eyes sweeping hungrily over your body as you struggled, bringing the urge to vomit to you. You didn’t bother to respond, still holding on to the hope that you could somehow manage to worm your way out of his grip, which was surely going to leave bruises. Idiot, bruises are the least of your concerns right now. You inwardly screeched at yourself. “Let her go.” A familiar, and yet completely unrecognisable, voice rang out quietly from behind the man, whose shoulder shielded you from being able to physically see who it was. But you knew. You’d recognise Hongjoong’s beautiful voice anywhere, although you’d never heard it quite so dangerously low and angry until this moment. The man scoffed, turning abruptly to face his interrupter, incidentally dragging you along with him thanks to his tight grip around you. Hongjoong was glowering, his hands curled in tight fists as he stared first at the man then at you, his eyes sweeping over you to check you were uninjured. “Joong.” You whispered, tears clouding your eyes. You made a mental note to thank him for following you after you berated him for the same thing. “Hey princess.” He said quietly, expression softening for a moment before it returned to your captor, hardening once again. If you were anyone but his girlfriend, you’d be terrified of him right now. “I’m not going to ask you again, let my girlfriend go.” Hongjoong directed his words to the man who spitefully gripped tighter to you, earning a reluctant whimper of pain from you. You could swear that the bones below his hand were close to snapping under the pressure of his hold. Hongjoong’s expression grew, somehow, darker and he stepped closer warningly. “What are you gonna do?” The drunk crowed, stumbling back and taking you with him, your eyes fixed desperately on Hongjoong. A part of you ached for him to close the distance and retrieve you, but another part was terrified of what would happen to the disgusting human holding you if Hongjoong got his hands on him. As much as you couldn’t care less for his life in this moment, you cared about Hongjoong’s, which would be ruined if he were arrested for beating a man to a pulp, even under the circumstances. “Honestly? I don’t think you want to find out.” Hongjoong told the guy, frowning in a way that made him look like Satan himself. Your body shook and you tried once more to tug yourself out of the vice like grip on your arm, resulting only in causing yourself more pain. Tears slid down your cheeks. “Ah,” The drunk rolled his eyes, glaring first at Hongjoong then you. “Stupid bitch isn’t worth it.” With that he flung your arm out of his grip, sending you tumbling to the ground at the sudden change and scraping your hands against the rough ground. Hongjoong was beside you in a heartbeat, arms encasing you and cradling you to him as an overwhelmed sob ripped out of your chest. You clung to him, shaking in his arms. “It’s okay Y/n, it’s okay. I’ve got you.” He whispered, kissing your forehead over and over, hands rubbing your back soothingly until you stopped shaking and the tears stopped trailing down your face. “It’s okay.” He repeated when you lifted your face to stare up at him with watery eyes, his thumb reaching out to sweep away the remaining tears clinging to your cheeks. “Let’s get you home.” He said softly, lifting you carefully to lean against his shoulder, his arm wrapping around your waist and taking almost all of your weight. Your legs weren’t injured, you wanted to point out, but you didn’t have the heart to and nor did you want to walk any further away from him than you already were. You held your injured arm to your chest, letting him continue to whisper soothingly to you as you both walked the rest of the way to your apartment. “I can go in alone.” You mumbled when you were standing outside the apartment door and Hongjoong was reaching into your pockets to retrieve your keys. He paused and looked at you with raised eyebrows. “If you think I’m going to leave you by yourself tonight after what just happened then you’re crazy.” He finally got the keys and slotted them into the lock, twisting it and pushing the door open. A rush of warm air indicated that you’d accidentally left the heater on before rushing out to meet Hongjoong, something that was now a blessing on your freezing skin as you both stepped into the small apartment. “My work-” You mumbled, eyes landing on your laptop, discarded in the middle of the kitchen counter. “Can wait. I’ll talk to your boss.” Hongjoong reassured you, closing the door and ensuring it was locked behind you before guiding you to your bed and gently sitting you down on the edge of it. He’d been in your apartment enough times to know where everything was without a light and soon he’d gathered your most comfortable clothes and dumped them on your lap, leaving you to change with a kiss and a gentle reminder that he would be in the kitchen calling your boss while you changed. When you’d finally managed to do it you slipped out to wrap yourself around him where he waited, sinking into the warmth of his body as he held you tightly. “Thankyou for following me.” You whispered against his chest, feeling him tense slightly at the words. Probably thinking, like you, about what would have, could have, happened if he hadn’t.

[dear-yunho]

The Mistake

Pairing : Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader Genre : Angst/Fluff Word Count : 3,595 Author’s Note : This was a really quick and random write up, so there are likely mistakes and parts that make no sense but nontheless.. here it is. 

“Y/n?” Groggily you pulled your phone away from your ear, checking the time displayed at the top of the screen. 2:38am. “San? Why the hell are you calling me at almost 3 in the damn morning?” You groaned, pressing the speaker back against your ear so you could hear his response. You’d barely gotten to sleep more than two hours ago, mind a turbulent blend of every tiny thing you had to stress about at the moment. School. Family. Friends. Hiding the fact that you knew and were friends with Ateez from the rest of the world. Not something that a normal 20 year old had to worry about, but something that was an everyday worry for you non the less. San cleared his throat, speaking much quieter when he started talking again. “Well.. Yunho is..” Your throat tightened at the mention of Yunho. Jeong Yunho, the tall dark haired boy with puppy like eyes who you’d had a crush on for as long as you could remember. The boy who had, inadvertently crushed your heart just two months ago. The one who you’d begged the rest of your friends not to talk to you about, because your heart couldn’t take the pain of thinking about him after what had happened that night. You squeezed your eyes closed tightly, only half hearing the next words San said in a hushed voice. “He’s really upset Y/n, he thinks that he did something wrong because you haven’t been talking to him.” He did do something wrong. “He didn’t do anything.” You breathed, knowing it was a lie but not caring. San was quiet for a moment, a soft sigh buffering through the speaker. “I don’t think that’s true but either way, whatever happened, shouldn’t you at least talk about it with someone? Even if it isn’t him, you know that any one of us are always here for you.” You appreciated the thought, truly. But you could barely even let your thoughts wander back to that night, let alone relive it to one of them. Tears welled behind your closed lids and you drew in a few shaking breaths until you felt confident enough to speak. “I can’t, San.” No matter how ready you’d thought you were, your voice still cracked at the end, making you feel small and worthless. You couldn’t even hide your emotions from San, how did he or any of them expect you to be able to face Yunho again without him figuring everything out in seconds? He may be an energetic ball of energy and good looks, but the most attractive part about him was his intelligence. “Y/n…” You could almost hear the sad pout in San’s voice and picture the way he’d have his knees pulled close to his chest, chin resting on the tops of them and hand clutching the phone as tight as he could to his ear. You could feel the sympathy and love from him like a beacon through the phone and it only made you miss him, miss them all, ten thousand times more. “I need sleep.” You choked, hurriedly wrenching the phone from your ear and hitting the end call button before throwing the device as far across the room as you could. It landed with a crunch of glass that made you wince in the corner of the room, close to your doorway. Despite knowing you’d probably just completely broken it, you could bring yourself to regret throwing it as you curled up in a sad ball below your covers. You didn’t want to talk to anyone right now. “Are you hungry?” You looked up in surprise at the sound of Yunho’s familiar upbeat voice, his tall figure leaning against your doorway, a take out bag held up in the air. He’d positioned it almost as if it were a shield, his wide brown eyes peeking out past it at you, as though he expected you to reject his company. You smiled, nodding him in and shifting some of the books on your bed to give him a space to sit. You needed to study, desperately. But there was nothing in hell that could make you turn Yunho away. He grinned, looking somewhat relieved and plopping himself with his normal energy beside you, humming and shoving the bag of food into your hands. A mouth watering scent rose from it, drawing a groan of hunger from your lips and a gurgle from your stomach as you wrenched it open and peered excitedly into it. “Yunho!” You beamed happily, dragging the tub of bulgogi out. His mouth quirked up as you dug into it, briefly forgetting about the piles of assignments you still needed to complete this week. “How did you get in by the way?” You asked through a mouthful of beef and rice, eyebrows raised at him. “You left the door unlocked.” He said pointedly, eyes glancing to the doorway of your room, through which you could just see the front door that entered your small apartment. You grimaced, shaking your head. Every time you entered your apartment you told yourself to make sure you locked it behind you. And almost every time, you still forgot. “You should really get an electronic lock, it’s safer.” Yunho reprimanded you softly, reaching out with his slender fingers tor ruffle your hair. You ducked out of his reach, resenting the brotherly gesture. You’d given up on putting any belief in your feelings for Yunho being returned long ago, but that didn’t mean you were going to make it any easier for him not to see you. “Can’t afford it.” You swallowed your mouthful and offered him the nearly empty container, smiling when he let out a small laugh and accepted it, scooping a small amount out into his mouth before handing it back to you. He chewed silently, watching you as you grabbed for your books again now that you were done being distracted by food, trying your best to focus on reading the information on the page you were up to. But his gaze on you was as distracting as a thousand bells going off at once and you found yourself glancing up at him curiously, trying to figure out why he was watching you so intently. “Yunho, what?” You finally blurted in exasperation, closing your book and giving him your attention. He blinked in surprise, a half hearted smile flitting across his lips, his cheeks tinging pink. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to distract you..” He said apologetically, lifting his broad shoulders in a shrug. You raised your eyebrows, not entirely believing the statement but choosing not to chase it up. He clearly had something on his mind, though what it could possibly be to make him act this strangely, you had no idea. “Yunho?” You asked quietly after a few more minutes of silence, reaching out to poke his side when he continued to stare at you, his eyes completely unfocused. It was unsettling to see him like this, he was normally so bubbly that it gave you a headache. He shook his head at your touch, offering you another one of those half smiles, still looking faraway. “What’s wrong?” You persisted, shuffling closer to him. You couldn’t help it, though every nerve in your body screamed at you to maintain distance between you, because it meant something different to you than it did to him, every other part of you ached to comfort him however you could. You knew he took immense comfort out of closeness to people, out of caring touches. On more than one occasion he’d dropped his head onto your lap and demanded you untangle his hair while he practised his lines for one of their songs. He’d never known how much it killed you and satisfied you at the same time and you’d never told him. You didn’t ever plan on telling him how he felt. Having all of his friends know was embarrassing enough and you just weren’t ready to risk losing his friendship over some stupid unreciprocated feelings. He looked at you carefully, biting his lip. You’d have to be blind and not secretly madly in love with him to miss the shine of tears in his wide eyes. “I think I made a mistake.” He admitted in a tiny voice, his bottom lip beginning to quiver. You frowned, reaching for him and hugging him tightly. “Whatever it was or is, I’ll help you through it.” You murmured into his shoulder, pulling away to look at him. You could have ripped out your heart and given it to him in that moment, watching a single tear slip from the corner of his eye and track its way down to his chin, his face contorting in something similar to pain. He clapped a hand over his mouth, turning his head so you couldn’t see, sniffles escaping in muffled puffs from below his fingers. Your heart ached in your chest and you had to force your hands to remain at your sides, not on his face to turn him back towards you. You wanted to tell him that he didn’t need to hide from you, you of all people couldn’t ever see anything but the best of him even in his worst moments. But that would be too much and this wasn’t about you, it was about him. “You can’t help me this time.” He whispered finally, turning back to look at you, his eyes still swimming with tears and his cheeks soaked. His forehead was furrowed and he swept his fingers over his eyes, as if that would stop any more tears falling. In spite of the action, a few more sped down his cheeks. “Wanna bet?” You murmured, finally giving in and reaching out to thumb away the remaining shine of tears glistening on his cheeks. He squeezed his eyes closed, shaking his head fervently, making you retract your hand. “Seriously Y/n, you can’t. Unless you know how to make me stop loving someone that is never going to see me.. you can’t.” He sighed out, glancing at you. You could have sworn that time froze around you as your heart shattered in your chest, your lips parting in both shock and pain. “You..you’d be surprised.” You choked out. You shouldn’t be surprised. You’d known he didn’t, couldn’t have feelings for you. You’d known that a day would come when he’d inevitably fall for someone that wasn’t you. You should’ve known. You sat up with a gasp, hand clutched tightly to your chest, cheeks warm and wet with tears. You could feel strands of hair clinging to your face. You’d fallen asleep, clearly, because the sun was up now, shining brightly through the window across from your bed, the curtains of which you’d stupidly left open last night. Your mind wandered back to the call from San as you reluctantly dragged yourself out of bed, searching for your phone beside the doorway. “How is it not broken?” You mumbled to yourself, turning the device around in your fingers in surprise. It was almost completely unmarked by the abuse of your throw last night, aside from the tiny scratch on the top left corner. The screen lit up with a message when you were done inspecting it, the green bubble adding on to the ridiculously long list of others. San : I’m so sorry San : Y/n please answer, I’m seriously worried about you. San : If you don’t answer I’m gonna get Yunho. Seonghwa : Is everything okay? San is worried about you.. Seonghwa : Y/n? Now I’m worried. Hongjoong : You’re scaring us all, just let one of us know you’re okay. Yunho : Y/n?? Y/n added to ‘Ateez GC’. Wooyoung : Has anyone heard back yet? Yeosang : What do you think idiot? Of course not. San : I shouldn’t have called her. I should have just let her be. Seonghwa : Which is exactly what we all said to you about fifty times the day before, did we not?… Hongjoong : He was worried, we all were. I understand. Yeosang : Has anyone tried going over to her place? Jongho : Well nobody knows where she lives now except Yunho.. Mingi : He won’t tell you, don’t even bother. Wooyoung : Do you know too Min? San : Mingi don’t know you know it too then? Jongho : You idiots really think he’s gonna tell you that? Yeosang : Someone needs to go and check on her, seriously. Seonghwa : Honestly, I agree and so does Hongjoong. He’s trying to contact Yun… Y/n removed from ‘Ateez GC’. San : Don’t hate me too much when you wake up.. Hongjoong : Aish I can’t believe you’re so stubborn. Yunho : Y/n.. Yeosang : Y/n I don’t know if you’re looking at any of our messages but just so you know, Yunho is comin.. Panic filled your chest and you swiped desperately on the most recent text, from Yeosang, fingers scrambling in your passcode to see the rest of the message. Yeosang : Y/n I don’t know if you’re looking at any of our messages but just so you know, Yunho is coming to your place. Now. San and Wooyoung begged him to come check up on you. You groaned loudly, swearing under your breath and leaping to your feet, rushing towards your front door. You were 90% sure you’d left it unlocked last night. Now more than ever you wished you’d listened to Yunho the last time you saw him and installed the electronic lock with a pin. You reached the door just as the handle turned and desperately you threw yourself and your weight against it, attempting to keep it closed. A useless endeavour considering that Yunho was both twice your height and weight. “Y/n stop it.” He grunted from the other side of the door, giving a push that sent both you and the door flying backwards. Whereas the door was stopped by the wall, you tumbled to the floor, a stabbing pain shooting up your backside where it connected harshly with the floor. “Shit, sorry.” You looked up in time to see Yunho kneel beside you, his face scrunched in both concern and relief. His hair was blue now and he looked older, and less happy than you’d ever seen him. “What are you doing here?” You snapped, shoving away his hand when he tried to help you up, opting for using the nearest wall to your advantage instead. His eyes dropped to the floor, mouth turning even further down if possible. You hated it, you truly did. But you couldn’t let yourself care about it, because if you did that then it was only going to hurt ten thousand times more that he loved someone else. “Everyone was worried about you..” He said quietly, peeking back up at you hopefully, as if that explanation would be enough to return you both back to your normal friendship. You clenched your fists, squaring your jaw and glaring back at him. “So give literally anyone else my address. Why did you have to come?” You were basically hissing now, barely able to see past the tears pooling in your eyes. You knew this was unreasonable, you were the one who’d asked him not to give them your address, not wanting to risk them turning up and outing both you and themselves to their fans. It was bad enough that Yunho knew and turned up so often. Had, past tense. It had been months since you’d seen him. His face was a sea of confusion and hurt, his hands twisting at his sides. He hadn’t understood then why you’d so suddenly told him to get out, clearly knowing that your excuse of needing to study was nothing more than a cover and he still didn’t understand now, months onwards. So much for his intelligence. But then, you couldn’t expect him to ever even believe that his second closest friend would have hidden feelings for him when he was so focused on his own feelings for someone else. “Y/n.” He said quietly, frowning at you as you slid back down the wall, barely containing sobs in the back of your throat. You just wanted him to leave, to take his familiar presence away and to let your heart continue to splinter until you convinced it to move on from him. You didn’t want to owe him the explanation sitting heavily on your tongue as he knelt back down in front of you, his hands steadying himself on your knees, drawn against your chest. You stared helplessly at him, wishing you had a better explanation for why you were so clearly against him being here. “Whatever it is..Whatever it was or is, I’ll help you through it.” He said, using the same words that you’d used on him all those months ago. Fresh tears sprang to your eyes and you looked away from his face, every possible inch of it covered in concern and care that you didn’t deserve for the way you’d treated him. “You can’t help me this time.” You closed your eyes as the words slipped from you, the exact ones that he’d said to you before breaking your heart. It felt like someone was ripping your chest apart now, trying to dig around for the remaining fragments to squeeze and destroy them some more. “Wanna bet?” His hands were on your face, turning it towards him the way you’d wanted to do to him that night but couldn’t. It was different for him of course, it didn’t mean anything. You looked at him, half glaring and half trying to keep in more tears. His lips pressed together sadly. “Y/n, whatever I did wrong, tell me. Tell me so that I can fix us because I’m dying without you by my side.” He begged, his voice catching in ways you’d never heard it catch on each word, tearing your chest apart even more. “Every night I’ve gone over and over what I did wrong, why you pushed me away. How I could have hurt you.” His lip was quivering now and his hands were still on your face, holding you and preventing you from looking away. You wanted to scream and curl into a ball, to beg him to leave. “Please.” He choked, desperation shining in his eyes. Eyes that had always known what you were feeling without you ever having to say it, until it came to your feelings for him. Hands that had always known just the right way to comfort you until he broke you into pieces that just didn’t go back together the same way anymore. Lips that you’d always known would be a source of safety for you until he used them to tell you he loved someone that wasn’t you. “I can’t.” “You can’t forgive me?” “Mhm.” You nodded, watching him try to understand you. “Why?” “You broke my heart.” The words came out before you even knew they were on the tip of your tongue, surprising you both. He stared at you, hands dropping slowly from your face to his side, his eyes wider than you’d ever seen him. You could almost see the cogs in the back of his head spinning out of control, his eyes glazing as he repeated your words in his head over and over. “I mean-” You stuttered, grasping at something, anything that you could say to explain away your slip up. He shook his head at you, pressing his finger to your lips, blocking any words from coming out. “I know what you mean.” He said quietly. He breathed in and out for a few moments, like he was calming himself. And then he did the unthinkable. He smiled at you. “You should have probably told me.” He said in a soft voice, finally dropping his finger from your lips. You blinked slowly, your turn to be confused and attempt to understand what he meant. “I don’t understand.” You finally admitted, sighing heavily. He was almost grinning now, shaking his head, sending blue strands across his forehead. “I think you really misunderstood me a few months ago,” Yunho whispered, leaning forward, his hand cupping your cheek and his nose brushing yours. Fireworks encased your body. “Yunho what do you mean?” You choked, frozen in place by the fact that his mouth was closer to yours than it had ever been. And then you were melting, because his lips were brushing yours, his hand pulling you until your mouth fell against his, returning his gentle kiss. “Idiot, you thought it was someone else?” He chuckled quietly, mouth moving to your nose, planting a delicate kiss, then to your forehead, dusting a few more lingering ones before returning to your mouth, catching your bottom lip between his teeth. “Mmph.” You pulled away from the intoxicating hold, staring wide eyed at him as his words sunk in. “Yunho-” “Yeah.” He nodded, moving forward back into your space, this time pressing your back solidly against the wall with his chest so that you had no space to escape him. You melted into his mouth, hands wrapping in the material of his shirt, chest arching against his. His hands held your waist, his soft chuckles falling into your lips as you kissed, until you managed to pull yourself away again, heavy pants filling the space left between you. “Me?” You asked in shock, wide eyed. He nodded. “You, it’s always been you.” He murmured, eyes softening at you. “It will always be you.”

[dear-yunho]

Jealousy

Pairing : Choi San (ATEEZ) x Female!Reader Genre : Angsty Fluff Word Count : 3,685 Author’s Note : Haiii! UwU please enjoy and if you have requests let me know! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

You were barely awake for more than two minutes when the slamming of a door made you sit up and cast a sidelong glance to the empty spot in the bed beside you.

San’s spot, which had been filled an hour ago when you’d briefly woken up to get a drink of water, was painfully empty, the dent where his body had been still warm. With a sigh you dragged yourself out of the comfort and warmth of your own position, casting a quick glance around the room in search of a hint for his sudden departure. Your only clue was his phone, which was discarded, still unlocked, on his bedside table. Normally you’d never touch his phone, you trusted San and he you, so there had never before been a reason for you to use it without his permission or knowledge first. This wasn’t normal though, your usually bubbly boyfriend had stormed his way from the room with barely more than a grunt from his mouth and you were pretty sure that the door might have splintered somewhere from the pure force he’d used to slam it closed behind him. So you picked up his phone, squinting through the haze of sleep in your eyes at the far too bright screen, taking a moment to process what you saw. Your heart plummeted heavily. An image, which he’d zoomed into, of you in the arms of someone else. Someone that wasn’t San. Around the image were words, toxic words that you barely read more than a sentence of to know that whoever had written this would be a better fiction writer than a reporter. Any idiot should be able to tell that this photo is years old, taken at least 2 years before you’d even met San. Your long hair, which was short now, was still it’s natural colour rather than the bleached waves it fell to your shoulders at now and your face still had a tinge of chubbiness on it that in the last year had completely evaporated thanks to your fruitless endeavour to help San in learning his difficult choreographies.   And yet it had clearly been the source of San’s rage, because he’d left his phone open on the image, zoomed into the way that the tall figure’s hands wrapped around yours and his dark eyes held on your figure with a loving gaze. Your heart panged lowly in your chest as you locked his screen and pocketed his phone, intending to take it to him when you confronted him for acting like a child over a photo that now meant nothing to you. “Y/n?” A soft knock, which was instantly followed by the creak of the abused door swinging open on it’s hinges had you lifting your head warily to greet the tallest member of the group as he squeezed into the room. His hand pressed the door shut as he fixed a concerned gaze on you, his bright hair still ruffled from the sleep he must have been awakened from. He’d graciously accepted moving into the room beside yours and San’s, the room he’d once shared with the blonde haired boy until San had begged for you to be able to move into the dorms a year into your relationship. The entertainment label had left it up to the boys to discuss, claiming that as long as you and San remained cautious they had no problems in where you did or didn’t live. The only person who had at first been against it was Wooyoung, although even then you’d known it wasn’t about you. He wasn’t ready to share his best friend more than he already had to. Eventually, clearly, he’d given in and even apologised to you, confiding his fears to you and earning a heartfelt assurance from you that though you’d be living here, San would still love him as much as ever, and he’d lose no extra attention than he had when you lived in your own apartment. Thankfully, that had remained true or else you wouldn’t have known what to do. You certainly couldn’t stomach the idea of being the issue between those two. “Hey Yunho.” You greeted him, sitting on the edge of your shared bed and smiling at him in a way that you were pretty sure displayed every emotion you’d rather him not see from you right now. He grimaced, confirming your thoughts, and sat beside you, slinging his arm over your shoulders and drawing you into a one armed hug. “What happened?” You allowed your head to thump onto his shoulder, fingers trembling in your lap as the reality caught up to you. San was mad at you. San, the boy with a dimpled smile and soft whiney voice that could barely hold a glare for longer than ten seconds, was genuinely pissed at you over a picture that was two years old, a picture that he’d never seen before because you’d never thought it would matter. Until now. Instead of answering Yunho you handed San’s phone over to him, watching him tap in the passcode that only the two of you knew because you’d all been in the same room when a drunken San had announced he was going to make it a combination of your and his birthdays. A sharp lance of pain speared your throat at the memory of that night, once Yunho had stumbled out to his room and passed out half on his bed and Half off it, you’d curled up in San’s arms as he sang into your hair, occasional hiccups or giggles interrupting his serenades. You didn’t want to lose him over something so stupid, something so old and insignificant to you. Wordlessly you watched Yunho read the article and watched his long slender fingers zoom into the photo as his brows creased in further concern. He made an effort to force away his misgivings when he finally looked up at you from the screen, which you might have appreciated more had you not already seen his expression. “It’s old.” You confirmed before he could ask the question clearly on his mind, and he nodded slowly, handing you back San’s phone. “Your hair is longer in that photo.” He agreed, as if it had only just occurred to him. You nodded, fingers playing idly with San’s phone. It didn’t have a case on it anymore, because he’d broken it a week ago in a pflayfight with Wooyoung and you knew he’d been meaning to replace it, but his schedule had been hectic since then. You’d planned to take him out this morning to help him find one, because even a small thing like that was important to him. So you couldn’t imagine how heartbroken he must have felt seeing that photo, whether or not he believed that it was recent or while you were together. Yunho squeezed your shoulder gently, his lips pouting a little at the sad expression on your face. Your bottom lip trembled and you turned into his chest, burying your face there and letting a few silent tears escape while his hand moved to your back, patting soothingly as he mumbled comforting words to you. You could barely hear him, because it didn’t matter. If you lost San, everything would cease to matter. You couldn’t even imagine a world in which his dimpled smile didn’t greet you every morning accompanied with his gravelly morning voice or the sweet kisses that he would spontaneously gift you at the silliest of times. You didn’t want to think about how you would get through a whole day, let alone the rest of your life, without a single one of the constant texts that often filled your phone from him, either sweetly checking up on you or whining that he missed you into a voicemail. “Maybe we should go find him and explain.” Yunho finally pushed you off his chest, his finger titling your chin up as his thumb swiped away your tears with a sad smile down at you. You wanted to shake your head and bundle yourself back into his arms. But you knew he was right, however much you dreaded facing San and seeing angry expression and hearing his accusations, you and San both deserved to at least discuss it. You needed to at least attempt to tell him it was an old picture, you needed the chance to save your relationship. “Okay.” You whispered through a sniffle, letting the taller boy stand and help you up, your fingers clasped too tightly around San’s phone. He must have muted his notifications so he wouldn’t wake you this morning when he’d rolled over to check his phone, because since you’d woken up none of the usual thousands of twitter notifications had vibrated the device. Which only made you sadder. He was so considerate, caring and loving. Like it was an instinct driven deep into his core and bones, and you couldn’t even be bothered to let him know about a photo that had been bound to be used against you at some point. Another sniffle let you and Yunho grabbed your hand, giving it a quick squeeze before opening the bedroom door and stepping out, holding it open for you to follow. You stared at him for a moment, taking in the dark circles below his kind eyes and the overall dishevelled appearance that clung to his tall form as he waited. His shirt was half tucked into the pants that he slept in and his hair was a bigger mess than you’d originally thought, the odd strand sticking up in directions that might have been comical to you in another situation. He looked exhausted, bone weary, but still he’d dragged himself out of bed to check on you and continued to help you now when it was clear he needed the sleep more than probably anyone else in the dorm did. Afterall, he stayed the latest overnight in the dance studio, practising the dance moves over and over until he reached perfection and then some, all so he could confidently help his members learn the moves quicker. You felt more tears prick the backs of your eyes and you swallowed past the huge lump in your throat, stepping past him and waiting for him before you continued on down the hall. Out of all the members in the dorm, you were the closest to Yunho, which may have something to do with the fact he very near to shared yours and San’s room with the closeness of his. But he was also the easiest to talk to, his bright encouraging smile always lit up every room he walked into and his intense loyalty to everyone in his family, Ateez and yourself included in that, were some of your favourite qualities in the puppy like boy. You both heard San before you found him, the sounds of objects being pushed around echoing solidly throughout the entire dorm, from the only room that had objects big enough to make that much noise being moved; the lounge room. Hongjoong and Seonghwa were leant, arms crossed, outside the entry way to the room when you and Yunho approached, both looking an equal mix of confused and miffed. “What’s wrong with him?” Hongjoong asked when you both were close enough to hear the bitter tone in his voice; San must have woken him. “What happened?” Seonghwa added in a much softer voice, casting his leader a berating glance then looking at you, the kindness almost physically dripping from his eyes as he waited patiently for an explanation. You swallowed, eyes darting between them and the closed door that separated you and San. You didn’t want to explain it to them, not when he was so close. You just wanted to see him, to hold his hands and explain it to him. “I…” You tried to focus over the heart shattering sounds of San cursing softly, yet loud enough to be heard through the door, after a particularly hard shove of one of the objects in the room that he was abusing. Yunho cleared his throat and squeezed your hand once more. “I’ll tell you, let’s let them speak.” He directed his words to his older members, jerking his head off down the hall. You felt a brief spark of panic at the idea of facing San alone when he was like this, which was quickly berated down by the voice in the back of your head reminding you that San would never hurt you. No matter how mad he was, he would never lift his hands against you in a threatening manner. So you forced away the feeling and nodded thankfully at Yunho, allowing Seonghwa to pull you into a sudden and brief hug. “Whatever it is, you can talk to me about it later if you need.” He murmured quietly to you, in a voice meant only for you before he let you go and hurried after Yunho and Hongjoong’s retreating forms. The sounds in the room had stopped now and you held your hand to the door handle for a silent moment, wondering if San had calmed down or if he was simply just exhausted with moving things around. You assumed the latter more likely than the former. With a heavy heart you pushed on the door and slipped into the room, blinking in the sudden blindingly bright light that greeted you and taking a moment to adjust to it. When you did finally adjust, your heart nearly stopped. San, hair somehow messier than Yunho’s, stood in the centre of the chaos that surrounded the room, his chest heaving and sweat coating his skin. You’d expected him to look mad, angry or sad even but he just looked lost and hurt, his eyes finding yours instantly. “San…” You whispered, jumping violently when the door slammed behind you, no longer having the support of your fingers to hold it open because they were clasped hard over your mouth. He remained silent, lips trembling much like yours as he stared back at you. You wanted nothing more than to launch yourself across the insignificant space between you, to wrap yourself into the arms that had held you lovingly so many times in the last year and a half that you’d been together. You wanted it so badly that your muscles trembled with the effort to hold you in place and a tiny whimper poured from your lips, silenced by the weight of your fingers over them. “San,” You repeated his name again when you had control over your voice, taking a tiny step forwards towards him. His whole body flinched in place, as if you’d lashed out physically at him and you froze, sure that he must be able to hear the sound of your heart crashing to the ground and shattering into a million tiny pieces. “I’m sorry.” It was the wrong thing to say, because you were sure to his mind it implied that what he’d seen was recent. But you couldn’t figure out what the right thing to say here was. You could explain it all to him, but you weren’t entirely sure that he could hear you right now. You weren’t even convinced that his glazed over eyes were seeing you either. A lone tear, cold like it had been collected and waiting in your eyes for too long, slipped down your cheek as you stood, waiting for some kind of epiphany on what to do hit you. In the end it was San that made the first move, crossing the room and lifting his hand to cup your face, thumb absently sweeping away the tear that still glistened just above your lip. You held your breath, mind reeling with the possibilities of what was going to happen. Was it only by instinct that he’d come to you to wipe your tears, like he had always done. Or had it been an excuse to scream at you for the photo, for never showing it to him before? Or was it something else? “Don’t cry.” He said in a defeated voice, eyes still lacking the emotion that you were expecting in their dark depths.  If anything, that only hurt more and this time your whimper found its way out, your hands curling into shaking fists at your side as you fought to say something more than ‘Im sorry’ to him. “San, it’s-” “I know it isn’t recent, Y/n.” He interrupted you quietly before you could even really begin explaining and you blinked, confused. If he knew that, then why had he stormed out, why was he shoving furniture around and looking at you like he’d lost everything in the span of a single second. ‘I don’t understand’ You tried to say with your eyes as he continued to watch you, lips pressed tightly together. You were feeling faint now, your mind working too fast for your body to attempt to figure out what was going on. He was clearly mad, so if he knew that the picture wasn’t recent then there had to be more to it. After a few moments San sighed, his hand roughly running through his hair. “It’s just.. the way he was staring at you in that picture..” You choked as he spoke, cutting off the end of his sentence and earning a somewhat confused look from him as you slid to the ground, incredulous laughs slipping from you. He was jealous, jealous of a relationship more than two years old. Jealous of the way your ex had stared at you while you were with him, the ex that you’d left for San, the guy that you’d never had to assure San you were over because you’d always trusted that he knew that. Why else would you have moved in with him? “Y/n?” He said cautiously, kneeling in front of you and taking your face in his hands, concern lighting up his eyes as he leaned closer to you, trying to understand your reaction. You gasped for air, closing your eyes and forcing yourself to stop laughing, to calm down. You were edging to hysteria when he pulled you against him, laying your head against his shoulder and murmuring quietly to you and by the time your laughs had turned to soft, relieved, sobs against his shoulder his hands were lightly playing with the ends of your hair in the way he knew you loved. You clung to his body until the last sob left you and your knees were aching from kneeling against him. “You were jealous?!” You muttered, pulling away from him. He looked guilty now, casting his eyes around the heavily disrupted room that he’d so angrily taken apart earlier then back at you, his gaze seeking forgiveness. “San, you know that I love you, right?” You asked him, grabbing his face in your hands and squeezing, as if somehow you could force some sense into him. He pouted and jerked his head out of your hold, looking away grumpily. “Choi San!” You exclaimed, hitting his chest gently. You felt lightheaded with relief, that he’d only been throwing a tantrum because he was jealous was a lot better than him throwing a tantrum over genuinely believing that you would ever cheat on him. “Can you blame me?” He hissed suddenly, eyes pooling with tears when he finally looked back at you, bottom lip tugged harshly below his teeth. You blinked, taken aback and your hands dropped slowly to your side. “Sannie, I-” You began, frowning. He lifted his hand, pressing it against your cheek in a way that radiated his love and yet his eyes continued to collect moisture. “You’re beautiful, Y/n. You’re the light of this entire house,” In any other situation you would strongly disagreed and reminded him how hard he laughed at his members, or how he would die if he didn’t have Wooyoung in his life as his constant support. “You’re the most important person in my life, I’ve never loved and treasured someone as much as I do you.” Your heart thumped unevenly, lips curling up despite themselves at his words, at the sincerity in his gaze. “The very idea that I could ever lose you to someone else, that someone else once held you the way that I want to hold you for the rest of my life is…” He shook his head, sighing softly, the warm breath brushing against your face. “It breaks me.” And now you understood. Because you couldn’t even begin to imagine how you’d feel if you believed even for a millisecond that San loved someone else, whether it was present or past. He pressed his forehead to yours, thumb ghosting over your lip. “I got mad and I’m sorry for that, because it must have scared you.” You closed your eyes, revelling in the simple beauty of his high, soft voice as it washed over you. “But it was only because I never want to lose you.” You knew his lips were closing in to yours now, because the scent of vanilla and hazelnuts that almost always seemed to be on his breath was overpowering everything else now and there was an indescribable heat hovering near your mouth that made you ache for him. “I can’t imagine a world where you’re not mine, where you’re not mine.” You inwardly groaned, hands sweeping up his chest till they found the edge of his jaw, urging his mouth against yours. You kissed him like you were starving, drowning, like his soft lips against yours were the only source of oxygen you would ever need or be able to need. In a way they were. “But I am yours. In this world, in the next and in any world that will ever exist with both of us in it.” You informed him through the kiss, tilting your head to side to bare your neck where his lips brushed loving kisses and nips that burnt through your skin like heavenly fire. “And I always will be.”