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[deviantofthemind]

date night

[deviantofthemind]

Ghost IS scary dog privilege. Like don't mess with him or the people he cares about because he can and will fuck you up. Actually- just behave yourself. Don't even risk being racist, or misogynistic, or homophobic near him, you don't know what he'll do. Don't even risk it, that motherfucker could rip you in half

But soap is crazy, insane, feral dog. Sure ghost is menacing, but soap? Soap is scary. Ghost will go for the jugular, but soap will go for the balls. Soap is insane. And he's good too, because you don't think anything of him. To you he's a normal guy. To the dude that slapped his partner, or the person still stuck with the racism of 1932, or the overly Christian lady who called the nice couple on the corner "unnatural", to them he's something else. Something far more sinister.

And Don't even get me started on what happens if you insult either of them to the other's face. Shit, man, that happened in front of price once, never again. That was so much worse than anything he's ever seen on the battle field. Maybe not physically, but mentally, emotionally, spiritually, every way other than physical.

[deviantofthemind]

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Figured out the orange side single handedly ♥

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁

Dec 30: Countdown - Loceit Rating: E

Logan had not expected it to be like this, not ever. Because had he, he maybe wouldn’t have done it. But he was glad that his evaluation had been wrong as he was laying face down on a soft blanket, more relaxed than he had ever been in his life.

[ Ahh well, it’s more Come Down than Countdown but I wanted to have this here because I’m self-indulgent and find aftercare scenes comforting.]

Sooo unfortunately rl severely derailed my plans for ficmas by swamping me with work (and anxiety) but I didn't found it fair to let you wait until Dec 30 for this piece I had already ready. I might finish the rest of Ficmas at some point but I likely won't be able to this December. Though there are lots of fleshed out ideas and partially written shots, so it's unlikely i'll abandon it completely.

“Fuck, Logan…” Janus laughed breathily, carefully unfastening the gag at the back of Logan's head. The other man was totally slumped against him, eyes glassy and whole body loose. He cupped his face with both hands to massage the strained jaw muscles and to support Logan's neck. “We did quite a number on you, hhm? Shut that overactive brain up real good it seems…”

“You’re drooling, Lo…” Janus smiled gently while cleaning Logan's face from tears, spunk and spit. The man blinked sluggishly at him, most likely not really comprehending what he was saying, but that didn’t matter. He made sure to keep a stream of soft chatter, praise and gentle touches up while cleaning his partner in the most calming way he could manage. He hoped he could prolong this experience for Logan as long as possible.

Janus hadn’t expected it to go like this, at all. It had been a spontaneous proposal from him, having previous experience and thinking that it could, maybe, benefit Logan and his hyperactive mind. They had talked about it extensively, of course. But still, neither he or Logan himself for that matter, had thought it would go like this.

“You did so well...I’m very proud, you took everything I planned and then some, you did so good for me, love.” He kissed his partners swollen lips chastely before lowering him down on the bed. The impact marks on the back of Logan's thighs and ass definitely needed some aloe but the rope indents should be fine once he gently massage them a bit to get the blood flow again.

To get confronted with how much his partner trusted him was mind blowing, it truly was. He had known that they trusted each other but Logan had handed over his whole sanity without a second thought and experiencing this kind of trust was another level entirely.

When he turned the other man to his front, he mumbled something unintelligible and Janus carded a hand through his slightly sweaty hair to make sure he stayed. The impact marks were pretty extensive and upon assessment some areas would definitely bruise in the next hours.

As he gently rubs the balm in, he thinks that Logan himself likely hadn’t estimated this, their first scene, to go like this. Which was typical, in the end. He wouldn’t have allowed himself that kind of release if he had known how it would affect him. As it was though, Logan had gone done very easy, almost yearning for the chance to give up any control.

It had been beautiful and his heart was tender with the love he felt for his partner. He pulled the soft blanket from the end of the bed over Logan. He was still feeling hot to the touch and the marks he left were positively burning but the other man would start to cool down soon.

Logan was watching him, utterly boneless against the soft surface, blinking reflex still delayed. It was obvious that he was still deep in subspace. “You’re wonderful, you know that. So good. And I love you so much. You amaze me, love.” he whispered, “I’m back in a second, okay? Just washing quickly and getting our things from the fridge.”

Of course they had prepared as much as they could, since leaving Logan like this, even just for a few minutes made him feel deeply uneasy. He washed himself hurriedly, hands, face, groin and so on before slipping in a pair of pyjamas. Retrieving the basket they had prepped from the fridge and grabbing some additional water bottles he was back in his room in record time.

His heart stopped for a moment when he came back to Logan sitting on the edge of the bed, blanket pooled in his lap, looking absolutely lost. Janus was with him in three long strides, setting his things down. "Lo, what are you doing, love? Are you okay?" 

"Ye.. - ah…" he croaked, hands fisted into the sleeves of Jan's pyjamas, "Just thought-.. you've been gone?" His nose scrunched adorably but his words could have made Janus cry. He was so damn soft for this man. 

“I’m back. Just got us snacks quickly.” He assured, gently opening Logan's hands and taking them in his. “You should drink some more water, you think you can do that?” 

A slow nod. Logan was still floaty and dazed. A little deft maneuvering later Janus had a newly hydrated Logan swaddled in the blanket and lying on his chest while he himself was propped against the pillows. He gave them both some more time to float and come back down gently, wrapped around each other before he decided it was time for something to eat. Their activities had been strenuous and burned a lot of energy after all and he didn’t want to let their blood sugar plummet. 

Feeding his partner fruit and chocolate, and not in a strictly romantic way too, was a new experience for Janus. And he bet it was for Logan too. He had been very open to the reasonable request when they discussed but getting fed out of plain care for your mind and body was intimate. Janus liked this, a lot. It settled a bunch of uncomfortable emotions that always came with domming. Seeing no embarrassment in Logan about being cared for like this was also balm for his very soul. When they finished their chocolate bar he even received a little crooked smile, a signal that Logan was coming back down gently now.

They slipped down to lie flat next to each other after sharing another bottle of water.

He kissed him unhurried, deep, wet, with tongue, just lazy strokes and flicks. It had surprised him initially when Logan had requested kissing as part of his aftercare. Not because he wasn’t enjoying it usually or anything. Logan was a very good kisser in fact and he had a lot of patience for it, which he rarely displayed for other things. But now, slowly snogging each other in the most intimate ways he understood that this was Logan's way of checking in with him, and on him. Maybe he had correctly suspected himself rendered barely verbal. 

“So, that was intense…” Logan said after a long time of them just sucking little hickeys into each other's neck.  His voice was still absolutely wrecked and the implications and memories sent a hot little shiver down Janus’ spine.

“Yeah. Very intense.” he agreed softly. He wanted to ask a thousand questions at once. How do you feel? Was it okay? Do you need anything? What could I’ve done better? Was there a point you thought about your safewords? 

He decided to simplify and not overwhelm his partner. “Would you like to do it again?”

To say he was flabbergasted would be a gross understatement of what he felt when his extraordinary composed, often perceived cold and analytical partner whimpered outside of a scene. “Yes, please.”

It took a moment to compose himself from that display of rawness that also warmed his insides in a lot of very different but very pleasant ways.

“Enthusiastic, I like that.” he whispered back, laughing quietly. And Logan, honest to God, blushed. He wouldn’t have deemed it possible considering what they had done with each other in the hours prior. But here they were. And if the half hard cock that was pressed against his thigh was anything to go by they maybe ought to talk about one humiliation kink or the other soon. But now was not the time.

“I’m genuine, Lo. I love that this was good for you. It turns me on that this was good for you. It makes me a little giddy that you might want it again.”

He received a nod in return and had to kiss him again, fuck his tongue between those pretty lips again because he was not lying when he said he was overjoyed how everything went. A few more minutes kissing, erotic, wet little sound and soft moans later Logans hip were rotating aginst him absent minded.

“You want to come?” he asked, opening his eyes to watch his partner's flushed face. 

“Yes, I- ..would like that.” 

“Hmm, you’re so hard for me already too, Lo. Do you feel good? Can you feel where we put those pretty red marks? Are they hurting?” He didn’t play around, they were both too tired for games. He took his cock into a firm grip after spitting into his palm, striking a consistent rhythm.

"Yes. Yes, yes, yes.." Logan panted, hands on Janus shoulders. 

Logan was always easily aroused by verbal cues, so Janus had developed a fine branch of dirty talk catering to both of them. 

"When I have you like this I always think about when you drill into me with that huge thing. I sometimes think I can taste you, Lo, dick so deep inside of me I can barely breath. That strong, thick thighs that usually fuck me senseless are all spanked and flogged raw now, Baby. So good, you're so good for me." If Janus hadn't come two times earlier he would definitely be right there with Logan now because watching him and riling him up like this was so irresistibly sexy. 

With wound up Logan had been earlier and Janus concentrated efforts of making him climax it didn't take long. He gritted out a final gasp and pumped hot semen all over Jan's hand and stomach. 

"Very nice, Baby…you okay?" 

"Hhmm…Jan.. Love you, Jan. Thank you." Logan mumbled in that scratchy voice, closing his eyes. 

"You're welcome, love. So welcome." he whispered, leaning over to dab a kiss to Logans forehead and eyelids. He didn't think that he heard when he excused himself to the bathroom again. 

When Jan came back Logan had melted into the duvets and pillows, mouth slightly agape, sleeping deeply. It was a sight Janus was treated to very often. Normally he would go to bed hours before Logan. And even if he caught him sleeping, he always seemed kind of stiff, as if he was unable to let go off all of his stress even while asleep.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁 Dec 9: Snowflake - Logicality Rating: E He was eternally grateful for Patton's foresight and preparation because when the time came, he just had to say one word. OR Logan announces a code snowflake and Patton delivers on it.

Logan's jaw was aching. Not because he had gotten into a fight with Roman, or anyone, for that matter but because he had been gnashing his teeth all day.

Sitting with everyone else on the dinner table was grating on his nerves, he had things to do and the ache from his jaw was slowly creeping upwards into his temples. It had been a few shitty weeks, with lots of unnecessary and aggravating drama.

He was so tense he could barely eat and he was sure that Patton had a very disapproving eye on him. After dinner, he and Patton were left to deal with the dishes.

“You okay, Lo? Need anything?”

It was an innocuous enough question and would have not been worth a second thought if he hadn’t come from Patton. As it stood Logan was not exactly okay and he almost always <i>needed</i> Patton, in the, you know, metaphysical sense one tends to need the person one loves. 

“I guess not?” Is what he says, instead of the very concrete thing ghosting around his mind, that would probably be incredibly useful and good right now.

“You sure?” Patton asked softly but neutrally, wiping down the table while Logan dried the dishes. He reconsidered. And Patton seemed wholly unperturbed by his silence, going about putting the cutlery away.

It would be a new thing. An intriguing thing. A thing that they had prepared for and Logan was very thankful for Patton's sensible foresight since it had taken them quite a while. He did want, right now, to get a bit out of his head, to relax, to enjoy his evening like any other person. It would cost him just one word and Patton would <i>make him</i> enjoy his evening like, maybe not, every other person.

Logan exhaled deeply, putting the last stack of dishes away. “Snowflake.”

He turned slowly to face his partner, now Dom, he guessed and Patton’s smile was patrically lighting up the dim kitchen. He stepped close, right into Logan's personal space to kiss him gently, both hands on his jaw, open-mouthed and gliding tongues. That was from zero to hundred real quick and it left Logan's head spinning a little but Patton was not letting go even after their lips parted. 

“Perfect.” Patton breathed, “Get upstairs, my room, undress. I’m with you in a second.”

Logan felt a little breathless, shaking his head to clear it, then nodding it to indicate that he had understood but Patton still was not letting go of his face.

“I can’t hear you, Lo.” Patton said sweetly, smiling a little when confronted with the visible confusion on Logan's face before understanding was taking over.

“Yes, Patton.” he simply said, getting rewarded by another peck and being released.

He was fast about his task, sprinting upstairs getting out of his clothes, shivering a little when newly naked. It wasn’t cold in Patton's room, it never was, and the newly installed fairy lights gave everything an even softer, warmer glow. So probably just nerves on his part. He wondered if it was okay to sit on the bed? 

“Hey love, here I am.” Patton interrupted his thoughts, putting a small basket down by the desk before coming over, “Perfect, very good. Please lie down, face down.”

Logan did, listening intently to Patton rustling around for a few more minutes before the bed dipped next to him and he turned his face to the side. He already felt weirdly calm and anticipatory at the same time. This was working better then he had hoped, and nothing had actually happened yet.

Pattons hand stroked down his back and ass with even pressure, almost massaging but not quite. “Okay. Something simple for today, yeah. As a first and also because you should actually take advantage after and sleep as much as you can. Remember your safewords?”

Logan nodded again, knowing his safewords and knowing what something simple meant, before remembering and almost tripping over his words to correct. “Y-es, Patton.” he turned his face back into the comforter and concentrated on breathing evenly. He knew Patton was smiling, maybe even laughing a little, even though he was out of sight, and that pleased him on a level he frustratingly struggled to explain.

The first few hits on his ass and thighs were startling and louder than he had imagined. Also he could see it potentially be humiliating, in some different setting. But it was not hurting in the way he had been prepared for, or maybe hoped for.

But then Patton checked in, placed a warm splayed hand between his shoulder blades and established a downright hypnotic rhythm. And it did fucking hurt after a few minutes. Logan could hear his own ragged breathing, his fingers were gripping the pillow like a lifeline, and there was sweat beading down his neck, his whole back a slippery plain. 

Patton checked in again and Logan was flabbergasted when he almost choked out his <i>green</i> with an accompanying sob. “Fuck, fuck- I..?”

“You’re okay, Logan, love. You can just relax, c’mon. You’re doing great. How’s your head?” Patton murmured softly, brushing a hand through Logan's sweaty hair but not waiting for the answer.

Logan's revelation that his head was indeed fantastic, that he wasn’t thinking, that his mouth was open slightly, relaxed and his tongue not pressed to the roof of his mouth was drowned out by Patton resuming his steady obliteration.

They stopped eventually. But Logan had a whole lot of difficulties sorting out his sense of time or anything really. So he let it be. The sweat, starting to rapidly cool him down, was very gently wiped away, whispering praise that Logan didn’t need to examine too closely a soothing background noise while he was floating a bit. Cool balm on his hot skin. He would feel this tomorrow, and wasn’t that wonderful?

Maybe directly after, maybe after some time he was cradled into his boyfriend's arms, leaning against his chest. A cute kiss. Patton always did cute kisses. Sometimes filthy, but always kinda cute. Logan giggled.

“Hey there you...feeling good Lo?”

“Yes, Patton.” Logan croaked a bit, but he couldn’t care less.

Patton pressed a bottle of cool water into his kinda numb fingers and made him drink a considerable amount.

“Need something else, love?” Patton asked again. But Logan didn’t. This was pretty neat, he felt a little more aware now but still bone tired and in the perfect state to fall asleep.

“No, perfect.”

“Indeed, that was perfect.” Pattons tone, tinged with pride and softness, made Logan blush a tiny bit while he curled tighter into the embrace as Patton lowered them both down to sleep.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁 Dec 8: Ice-Skating - Dukeceit Rating: T

Janus isn’t ready for going ice-skating with his NHL playing boyfriend for the first time. Not really.

“Fuck-! Fucking hell! REMUS?!”

They have been together for almost a year. And Remus has had a key to his apartment for about a month now. So it’s not that he is there that has Janus fuming upon entering his door but the almost falling over a small mountain of hockey gear left directly behind the entrance.

Possibly he is tired and hungry and therefore a bit cranky too. But that doesn’t change that his normally meticulous space is invaded.

Remus comes blustering down the stairs of the maisonette upon hearing him. Has the audacity to look cute and still half asleep.

“Hey Jan!” he smiles and steps close for a welcome-back kiss. Janus is having none of it right now, he is angry at this weird shift of balance and intertwining lives. And the mess, of course.

“What the fuck is this?” Janus cuts him off, gesturing unpacked gear, pinching the bridge of his nose to stave off the headache, that is lurking.

His 6'5 boyfriend visibly deflates, looking like a kicked puppy for all that it’s worth. “Uhm..just my hockey stuff, from training?” he says, as if he’s asking Janus. He would never ever (not yet, at least) admit it but the flood of guilt he feels quells the irrational anger he’s brought home real quick. He nods curtly, and steps over the mess to get himself sorted.

One of the reasons they worked out so well in the beginning was that Janus couldn't give two shits about hockey and how Remus was famous. That had been a relief for the other man and Janus had only been delighted by the youthful goofball.

Maybe it was time to change that? To be more...invested into each other's interests and life?

Jans neck cracked audibly when he rolled his shoulders back to shake out some of the tension and lingering tiredness of his flight. He could hear Remus come into the bedroom, hesitating a little.

“Sorry about that?” he said, shrugging a lot more insecure than Janus liked him, “I know you like your apartment tidy…” - “It’s alright. I mean, I do. But it wasn’t a major issue. I’m sorry for yelling in lieu of hello.”

Janus pulls him in, until they are chest to chest, Remus a good head taller and looking down at him with a bit of a puzzled expression and he sighs before dabbing a kiss to his jaw. “Good to be home… Hey maybe, wanna go out for food? And then you could take me to the rink at central plaza?” He says before he can think better of it.

“You wanna go skating? With me?” Remus asks, a little incredulous and obviously delighted at the prospect.

“No. With aunt Patty.” he deadpans, making Remus laugh before getting kissed and squeezed breathless. “Yeah, okay. we can do that.”

Janus clearly did not think this through in his squishy, soft moment thinking of more commitment. Because he has never in his fucking life stood in skates, least of all been skating.

So a few hours later has him wobbling onto a busy rink, death grip on his boyfriends forearms, who is clearly trying not to laugh as he moves them both gently away from the gate.

“All good?” Remus grinned, unfortunately looking positively delectable, “You can relax a bit there, okay? I won’t let you fall.”

“I’m good.” Janus gritted out, between clenched teeth, carefully, slowly losing his grip a little.

It was a horrible experience through and through. It involved touching his skilled, confident, sexy boyfriend the entire time. Learning one or two new things about him, skating and hockey, because apparently gliding over an overfilled rink slowly made him a lot more talkative than he usually was. Also skating was fucking exhausting. And distracting. 

Which was because the whole thing was eliciting some obnoxiously dirty talk from Remus, making Janus even hotter under his already sweat soaked hoodie.

“Remus!” he hissed, turning around to check if any had heard him and making his boyfriend laugh even more, “What is it with you?! We are in public.”

“Ah, I don’t know Jan. It’s the mushy, romantic mood. And being here and skating. With you.”

Janus knew Remus had tried for mocking but not succeeded in the slightest. Right decision after all. And maybe, <i>maybe</i>, he could learn to enjoy this too.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁 Dec 7: Cold - Roceit Rating: E

This bit is heavily inspired by angelsdemonsducks wonderful fic  this cup of yours tastes holy (this lie is dead). Seriously, it’s so lovely. It’s Loceit and I absolutely fell in love with that cool af court scene they wrote and I had do try do my own.

Roman is waiting impatiently for the return of his most trusted advisor and diplomat to return for the Christmas festivities at Sanders Castle.

“Are his chambers prepared?” Roman asked while he was signing the last documents on his desk. 

“Yes, Your Majesty, everything is arranged for My Lord to return tonight.”

Roman dismissed his butler with an appreciative nod. Once alone he rolled his shoulders trying to get out some tension. It had been trying weeks leading up to this day. A war avoided by hair's  breadth. A marriage evaded once again. A new ally secured somehow in all of this chaos.

And all thanks to the one man he finally, finally would be seeing again tonight.

Only weeks ago he had thought he would be on a battlefield by tonight and then everything had turned around. In their euphoria the whole palace had managed to organize for the traditional Christmas festivities to be even grander than the years prior in such a short time span.

Roman still felt equal parts elated and exhausted. And he was very glad that the year was over. Not just for the sake of it being spiked with political conflict left and right that had now quieted down. But also because a whole year was a torture device like he hadn’t thought possible.

Hours later, the sun long down had the great hall bustling with noise, chatter and clatter. Guests and inhabitants of the castle filled the hall, eating and generally utterly relieved and relaxed.

Roman almost missed when the door of the side entrance to the hall opened for just a second and a tall figure walked in silently, cloak all glittery white and heavy with snow. He was actually holding his breath when the other took off his hood. He looked just as delectable as Roman remembered him. He couldn’t believe it had been a year of only letters. No one besides him seemed to be aware of his most appreciated confidant.

He smiled that vague little smile Roman loved so much, then respectfully implied a bow, and Roman loved that he couldn’t tell if the gesture was genuine or mocking. Then he turned and searched for a place on one of the banquet tables. His own attention was demanded once again by the nobles sharing his table and he lost sight of his evasive diplomat.

Once the feast was over and everyone was going about their business, searching out acquaintances to exchange well-wishes and bask together in the moment that well and truly meant that a war had been evaded, that had looked inevitable up until the last second.

Janus finally approached him, the same tiny smirk on his lips. He himself had retreated to the fireplace at the far end of the hall, as far away from the music and the mingling as possible, desperately hoping he would at least get to talk to Jan with a modicum of privacy. His heart was racing with the anticipation to have him back, to have him close again.

“Good evening, Your Grace.” Janus greeted pleasantly, his voice a lovely, low hum. And his  pretty, dark eyes burning into his when he knelt to kiss his liege’s ring.

Of course this was the exact expected behaviour to display at court when one was confronted with one's king.

Of course Janus let his lips drag over his fingers. Roman wanted to rail him. His fingers twitched imperceptible as Janus stood, graceful and looking as unaffected as one would expect. Roman knew him better.

“Excuse me, Your Grace, I don’t want to hold you up. I’m sure there are a lot of people that want to talk to you tonight.” And he vanishes. Leaving Roman a little shell-shocked, and aroused to make pleasant conversation with anyone but him for the rest of the evening.

He bristles, a little. But he also knows he’ll find a bath warm lover in his bed later. And he had seen the exhaustion in Jans eyes close up.

He wandered the hall dutiful, talking, making connections, letting folks see him while his mind stayed glued steadfastly to whatever he imagined Janus might do in this second. Getting rid of his cloak and armour? Unpacking? Delivering all important writs he brought to Romans study? Undressing? Slipping into the bathtub? Unwinding? Warmed up again after months cooling down?

Romans neck felt hot when he finally, finally excused himself from the festivities. He tried hard not to hurry, keeping his steps measured and even. Taking the time to send away the guards in front of his quarters before slipping in almost as silent as Janus probably had.

And there he was, half leaning over Romans massive desk to read a paper, clad only in one of Romans shirts, hair still damp and turning to him.

“Roman.”

He was with him in four large strides, cradling that sharp jaw to press a nearly desperate kiss to palish lips. It did not feel different at all, same fire answering, pressing back after just a second of hesitation, unsure if they were still the same. The were. They had to be or Roman was going to lose his mind.

"You've been away so long!" - "I apologize, Your Grace, I was trying to save your kingdom." Clearly mocking, this time. Mischievous eyes and upturned brow and perfect.

"You are not allowed to ever leave again!"

"As you wish, my king."

They both know it’s futile vow. Empty, in the grand picture of things of securing a reign and keeping peace. But it doesn’t matter right now. Not when they simultaneously open their lips for one another, tongues stroking softer than what their bodies suggest.

Roman crowds Janus slender, body against the desk. The fission thought of too slim, starved from months of malnourishment at a military camp, is gone with the first groan from that mouth and strong arms around his neck pulling him closer.

“Missed you…” Roman mumbled distractedly, but needing to say it nonetheless, “I can barely sleep without you by my side.”

It’s true. And not just in the romantic way of entwined, warm bodies but in the visceral protectiveness and loyalty that is his lover. Janus would die for him. Had killed for him. And felt no remorse.

The sound his confession gets out of Janus is an interesting mix of cooing and growling that makes his insides feel like molten lava. He’s so hard it hurts. Had been since that slick tongue had touched his fingers hours ago and he had half a mind of retaliation by shoving a few between increasingly pinker lips. Later.

“I need you..!” he gasps, kissed breathless.

“Yes, my king.” No jeer, no sarcasm, just the same need.

They stumble to the bed, unsteady but hastily, greedy for each other and shivering as they lose their clothes on the way over.

The tenderness that constricts Romans throat isn’t unexpected when Janus is under him, naked, and proves Romans earlier assessment right. There are also new scars, ones that he wants to ask about but not know about. Janus is shameless and he doesn’t care much for Romans sensibilities when it comes to himself and just reels him back in, kisses him breathless again. 

It’s messy and unrestrained. Everything they aren’t in the light of day, individually and together. It’s filthy and precious, slipping into that tight, oil-slick hole and, overcome by pleasure and relief Roman allows himself an “I love you…” 

Janus does not say it back. He never had and probably never would and Roman didn’t need him to. He reveled in the raw panting that was coming out of Jans mouth instead, eyes a little glassy, heady mix of pleasure and pain. It had been some time and Janus liked it that way. Liked to go about his tasks the next few days, still being able to feel Roman, even when they would be too busy to get into and under each other's skin again.

It took not more than these thoughts and the incredibly tight glide to push them both over the edge far sooner than either would have liked.

And in the aftermath it was all too easy to be lulled to sleep by the smell and breathing of Janus, bodies still tangled. They should talk. There was so much to talk about. But Roman had meant that he never was able to sleep as he would have liked to, as he could with Janus stretched out next to him.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁 Dec 6: Hope - Intruality Rating: M

Patton spends the night before Christmas in the hospital after his boyfriend had been in a (near) fatal crash.

By the time Patton was tentatively approached by a kind nurse he had already been crying on a hard plastic chair for almost two hours. She was very friendly, handing him a plastic cup of chamomile tea and offering words of reassurance he was unable to process.

Remus had been in an accident. Obliterated clean of a crossroads on his motorcycle by a drunk driver. Remus was only barely alive right now. They were supposed to be home right now, sweaty and exhausted and sated. And not here. Not apart. Not like that.

His cheeks felt raw at this point, sore from tears and wiping them away. His throat felt sore too, with the choked sobs that had torn out of it when he’d been notified by the hospital staff. He had next to no recollection on how he had gotten here, just of being here, while the man he loved was fighting for his life.

The overhead light was your typical grey-greenish cold flicker, and Patton wasn’t sure if that was the reason for him shivering so damn much that he needed to hold on so tight to his tea but it might have as well been.

He also hadn’t been able to follow the doctor that had updated him of Remus' present condition and the surgery going on right now in an attempt to save his life. Just that it was life-threatening had very well short-circuited Patton's already panic-swamped brain.

It’s another hour later before a middle aged surgeon steps up to him and Patton is more exhausted than ever before in his life. He realizes that he has no idea how to brace for whatever words will inevitably come out of the man's mouth in a few seconds. It’s simply not imaginable.

Remus lives. ICU. Overhead light flicker. Extensive blood loss. Overhead light flicker. Possibility of permanent damage. Overhead light flicker. Stable, for now.

When the doctor steps back, Patton gasps for air, the rush of his own blood deafening in his ears. He’s dizzy all of the sudden, tiny black dots dancing in the periphery of his vision.

He gets a grip on himself. He has to. He’s not the one almost being killed and alone and in pain and fighting. His job is being strong, he <i>needs</i> to be. In his own perception he still needs an unwarranted amount of time to get his body back under control enough to follow the medical staff tasked with escorting him to Remus.

When people tell you someone is pale, or when movies show you someone who is pale, they get it wrong. Patton is certain. Because he’s never, anywhere, seeing someone so plainly white as Remus is right now. 

The kind nurse pulls a chair over for Patton to sit down, probably scared he would crumble, and tells him to call for him any time. He has not even the mind to thank him, wringing his cold hands, gaze transfixed on a vicious pattern of scrapes of Remus' exposed shoulder. 

The sense of wrongness in that still, sturdy frame is hard to comprehend. The man he loves is never still. He’s pretty huge, for lack of a better word. Patton huffs a shaky laugh. But it’s true. Remus is tall, broad shouldered , athletic. Strong. Foulmouthed, obnoxious and animated. And not...this. Not this. 

This is just the vivid and horrifying threat of loss. Thinly veiled by the misplaced peace of the night before Christmas.

When the first light of the morning filters through the yellowed blinds and Pattons eyelids just hurt from being held open by force of will he feels the lightest squeeze in the hand he had sneaked into the formerly limp counterpart.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁

Dec 5: Ornament - Royality  Rating: T

A royal Christmas Wedding. (This is essentially just the newlyweds gushing about each other :)]

Patton was stunning. Absolutely breathtaking. And he obviously felt really uncomfortable with all the attention he was getting on his wedding day.

The whole day had been a flurry and Roman had barely talked to Patton beyond their vows. They had known, of course, that it was going to be somewhat like this, their mothers banding together to plan and orchestrate and give the New Yorker high society something to talk about instead of a celebration for Patton and him themselves. But, oh my God, it was like being in a tank of sharks instead of being surrounded by people meaning them well. It was getting annoying. He just wanted to nuzzle into his husband's neck and breathe for a few seconds.

His husband. Somehow that hadn’t sunken really in until now. They had really gone and done it. Defied any societal bullshit. Granted they were kinda paying for it with their wedding day being totally side-tracked, but somehow that seemed like a small price to pay.

But now he had to save Patton from a circle of old women increasingly impolite and direct questions.

“I apologize profusely, ladies but you’ll allow me to hijack my husband for now.” 

He gave them his brightest smile as he put an arm around Patton's waist to lead him out on the deserted balcony. He deflated and relaxed visibly, poor angel, this must have been even more taxing for him than for Roman.

“Ugh, thank you…” Patton sighed, stepping closer to sink into the offered embrace, “It was getting..uhm- meddlesome.

“I could tell.” Roman smiled into the soft mob of hair, smoothing his hands down Patton's white waistcoat in a soothing gesture. “What a day, hhm?”

Patton was drawing back a little to look up and press a kiss to Romans jaw. “Yeah..that was not what I expected when we allowed them to take this over,” He said softly, with a wry smile tugging at his lips, “But I’m married to you now, so..I’ll take it.”

Roman snorted, pulling Patton a little closer still before exchanging only their second kiss of the day. Soft, sweet, nothing hurried, just a reassuring lovely press of lips. Patton shivered a little, the contrast of the cold winter night air and Romans warm lips giving him goosebumps.

“You’re cold,..we should go back inside.” - “I don’t wanna…”

Another kiss, half laughing into each other's mouth.

“Not long anymore, Darling. I think it’s safe to vanish in about an hour without raising any eyebrows.”

Patton put on an overstated pout, making Roman laugh again. “You look stunning, by the way. I hope you know that.” he whispered, before bending down a little and pressing another tiny kiss behind Patton's ear, “And if you don’t, then be prepared for me telling you all night how devastatingly beautiful you are.” 

Patton blushed absolutely crimson, it was astonishing. It was a little as if the magic of the snowflakes started to fall around them and the charm of them finally being husband and husband had added a bit of a new fire. On top of the old one.

“And you… you are very beautiful too..!” Patton finally said, a little breathless and Roman knew he needed to get back inside now, or they would be rude. Very much so.

“See you in an hour? At the tree? So we can take our own ornament?” he asked, catching those lovely whisky eyes.

“Yeah, yes! An hour.”

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁

Dec 4: Holiday Movies - Anxceit  Rating: E

Virgil is cosied up for christmas break with his boyfriend in his parents otherwise empty house. They plan on nothing but eating an ungodly amount of food, relaxing and watching mushy Christmas movies. They don’t actually watch anything.

Finals week had been freaking hell on earth. Had anyone told him just how much it was, he may have reconsidered college. Virgil had been so stressed that the muscles in his jaw were sore because he had clenched his teeth so much. And now his calves and thighs were equally as destroyed because he had tried to run the stress out of his body, literally.

He panted hard, bent over, hands on his knees. The cold air burned in his throat and lungs and the sweat on his body made him shiver in the fresh winter wind. 

With his icy hands he had a hard time unlocking the front, fingers fumbling and numb. When he finally made it inside he was immediately surrounded by a cosy warmth. The smell of lasagna his mom had made this morning, before his parents left for their vacation, was still strong in the air. 

He generally was in a pretty good mood, the holidays were here, his boyfriend would be here in a few hours, he just had to get rid of the residue of lingering anxiety and, it seemed, he’d been successful with his run. He would take sore muscles and post-sports-starve any time. That was one reason, if not the only one, while he played lacrosse and he thought it was one of the reasons while Janus was into soccer.

Between the two of them they could eat a very impressive amount of food. Virgil would forever cherish the memory of Janus being invited over for the first time to have dinner with Virgil's parents. His mom, very smugly, saying, “I’m so happy to see you enjoy my cooking!”, after Virgil had them both dealt a third helping. It was probably the only time he’d ever seen his boyfriend blush. 

He stuffed a left-over piece of pizza into his mouth at once, checking over the content of the fridge while at it and found it to be satisfactory stacked. Sitting down on the kitchen island he willed himself to chew slowly and checked his phone for an update from Jan. Nothing yet, but Virgil knew he was on his way. 

The shower was good, Virgil lingered much longer than he usually would. He only got out when his stomach rumbled to signal for more food than just a tiny piece of pizza. Also, he didn’t want to miss the doorbell. He hadn’t seen Janus for almost three weeks after all and was a bit giddy with it.

He had a snack of another piece of pizza while he waited for his oatmeal to cook and just appreciated the quiet and newly loose muscles. He took the bowl into the living room, eating on the floor while he lit the fire so he could warm his cold feet in front of the fireplace and also because it was romantic. Jan liked romantic. Virgil might do so too, not that he would admit to that outright. On second thought, he probably had already when they talked about what they wanted to do for their break and Virgil had said he wanted to be alone and watch christmas movies. 

Just when he had shoved the last spoon into his mouth he could hear a car pull up into the driveway. It was a little embarrassing how quick he was up and unloaded his clattering bowl into the sink before he opened the front door.

Janus was just slinging his duffel bag over his shoulder, smiling brightly as he walked over the short way to Virgil. He swooped him into a very nice kiss hello. Soft lips and gentle pressure. “Hi Virgil..” 

Suave fucker. "Good to see you, asshole." Virgil grinned despite himself, pulling Janus inside the house to kiss him again, a lot more sloppy. 

“You’ve missed me, huh?” Virgil had to nip that annoyingly handsome smirk off his face because turning around gesturing up the stairs.

“Wanna get rid of your bag first?”

“Would love to.” Jan still grinned that smug smile and before he could himself blush even deeper, Virgil led up the way to his room.

When Virgil had decorated that room at the ripe old age of fifteen he wouldn’t have thought that one day he might he coming home from college and maybe have sex with his boyfriend for the first time. In all fairness, he still had been fairly convinced that it would be a girlfriend back then.

He heard Jan snort on his laugh when he stepped inside the room after Virgil, letting his duffel fall to the floor by the door. The sound was nice. Deep, rich. It was more than nice actually. And it was what had endeared him to Janus in the first place. Now it made him a little nervous, not just because his incredibly cringey, teenage angst nightmare of a bedroom was on display.

Janus walked around the room, still laughing softly, downright giggling at one or the other ancient poster.

He turned back around to Virgil fiddling silently with the cuffs of his hoodie. “This is very you. Would have definitely been able to pick out this as yours under a thousand.”

“Is- uhm, is that good?”he asked, and it came out soundly a lot more insecure than he intended, making him wince a little.

Janus stepped back into his comfort zone, sighing softly, before kissing him again. Not as charged as before just...incredibly mushy and sweet. “Perfect.”

They spend the afternoon making some mulled wine, accidentally cooking all the alcohol out of it, too busy snogging on the kitchen island. And talking, mostly gossiping and venting. And it was good, it was exactly what Virgil had hoped when he offered spending the holidays together. Just, spending time, being comfortable, shaking off the stress and anxiety of the last weeks. 

They warmed the lasagna and got cosy in the living room later that evening. Shoveling his face with his mom's cooking and reminding his boyfriend of the first time they did. Janus did the endearing blushy thing again. Vorgil felt exceptionally good about his plans.

“Wanna watch a movie?” he asked when they sorted both their long limbs to get comfortable snuggled together.

They decided on Happiest Season and got about ten minutes into the stream before Virgil was distracted by Jans sharp jawline, feeling compelled to kiss and nibble softly until he could hear the breath of his very composed boyfriend hitch lightly.

“V…, Baby.” Janus hummed softly, using the nickname that never failed you make Virgil heat up all over. He let his mouth wander until he reached another pair of soft, relaxed lips to slip his tongue in. Jan gripped him more firmly, pressing him against his chest, heat trapped between them now, while they kissed. Things only got more heated between, the kiss downright dirty and open-mouthed and a little dizzying with the lack of oxygen. Both of them were hard, which was nothing new really, they often got turned on like that from kissing each other.

“Hey V..” Janus asked, right against his lips, gorgeous and absolutely out of breath, “Can I blow you?”

They hadn’t done that yet. Actually they hadn’t done anything really, except for rubbing against each other, fully clothed. Because Virgil had been to anxious about, well, everything, to do with having sex with his boyfriend. Jan had never pressed for anything more and he was intensely thankful for that. But he must have felt too that tonight was different. And holy shit, he wanted to get his mouth on Virgil's dick! He could actually feel his dick dribbling a little at that and had to hide his head in Jans neck to get himself under control.

“Fuck yes, yes, please, I’d like that.” he whispered. Again that irresistible laugh, but this time it made the unbearable heat in his belly even more intense.

“Okay, yes, sounding enthusiastic there, yes?”

“Yes, yes, very enthusiastic. Very.” he hurried to say when Jans fingers wandered to his waistband.

“Just making sure..” This time the heatwave came from his boyfriend smoothly sliding onto the floor between his outstretched legs, and it made actual sweat break out in the small of his back. The sweats were gone in an instant.

Shortly before Jan was about to strip him out of his pants he gripped his hands in a sudden bout of nervousness. They’d never been naked around each other either, what if- “Virgil, Baby.” Janus interrupted his rabid brain, “Stop thinking. I already know you are gorgeous and I want you, yes?”

He waited until Virgil cracked a small smile and confirmed that he could go on, still a little wary but also really, really excited.

In comparison to all the porn Virgil had ever seen this was incredibly sloppy. Nothing about it was tidy and very coordinated or anything like he had imagined from what he had ever seen. And it was mind numbing. Absolute bliss and it was over so fucking fast he could barely warn Jan.

“Fuck, Baby.” And again that incredible warm laugh. Virgil didn’t feel like examining how he was liking his lips while doing it or he most likely would have ended up with the next erection.

“Want me to..?” he gestured a little helplessly and dazed between his boyfriends legs which must have been a little funny because he was treated to another soft huff. “Don’t worry, V...taking care of it myself real quick. Just relax and savour that afterglow, yeah? We have all of the holidays if you want to  reciprocate.”

[deviantofthemind]

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ apocalypse now ♥ [I just thought, you know, in honor of 2020 ending soon.]

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁

Dec 3: Shopping - Prinxiety Rating: T

Roman is unduly excited about christmas shopping. Virgil finds it annoying, but also unsettling, embarrassing and so very nice.

“Roman, please.” Virgil hissed between clenched teeth. This was the third high end fashion shop they were in and Virgil was sweating with humiliation.

He didn’t even know what made him agree to accompany Roman for his shopping spree and now he was regretting it bitterly as his boyfriend tried to convince him to try on a coat that cost more than Virgil was usually living off for a year.

He felt so out of place it wasn’t even funny. How had he even ended up here, with the most attractive man in a 100 mile radius, that was somehow rich as fuck too?

“Hmm, yeah, you’re absolutely right. That's not your style at all..” Roman hummed thoughtfully. And Virgil didn’t even know anymore if Roman was taking the piss out of him. They were together for a grand total of two weeks (the months of flirting Virgil up at any chance didn’t count!), what if this was just a hoax to embarrass him?

“I’m going to get some fresh air.” he whispered before almost fleeing the shop, leaving his boyfriend standing there alone.

The air outside was crisp and hurt little as Virgil hastily drew it in to quench the wave of panic he felt. This was all fucked up, what had he been thinking? This would never fucking work. He couldn’t believe Roman managed to get him inside these shops in the first place. In his ripped jeans and almost worn through hoodie!

It didn’t take long until Roman joined him outside, smiling his dumb, sweet smile when he caught sight of Virgil huddled into a corner. “Baby! I got some things. Are you alright?”

Virgil took a shuddering breath and swallowed. “Roman...I don’t think I can do this..”

“Oh no, are you tired, Baby? Cold? You are right, we should definitely have coffee and a snack and relax.” 

Before Virgil could intervene Roman had taken him by the hand and he was gently tugged in the direction of the nearest coffee shop with no chance to ever clarify that he just wanted to end the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Of course he paid for the damn caramel latte and Virgil had to hide his red face behind the cup as they settled in one of the comfortable booths. Naturally the dumb man slid in ride next to him, huge, warm body pressed next to his.

Roman took a sip of his (incredible complicated) sounding coffee and sighed. “What’s up, V? Not feeling well?” 

The puppy dog eyes, wonderful. Virgil just wants to snog him silly. He’s so in love it’s pathetic. “No, no, I’m good. Just...uhm, this is not a good mix?”

“The coffee? I can get you another?” 

Virgil laughed, how could he not? “No, God, the coffee is fine Ro. I meant us.”

“What?” He looked startled and concerned and Virgil was already regretting that he brought it up. “But..I love you and I- ..Am I doing something wrong? I’m sorry I’m not sure how this is supposed to go? I can do better? Please?”

“No, oh fuck, Roman, no,“ Virgil whispered back reassuringly, as if he hadn’t thought about ending this at all, “I just meant, maybe it’s not such a good idea, going shopping together and all.” 

Roman hummed unsure, “Uhm, okay? If you don’t have any fun than it’s better we do something else together? Is it the people? We could go on a trip over Christmas and not see anyone?”

Virgil was going to cry. Honest to God cry. And he felt bad for ever thinking that there could be any kind of malice behind Romans actions. 

“Roman, please, erhm- it’s not that either. Though I could definitely spend some time with considerably less people around.” Virgil started, turning to that huge oaf he very much adored and decided to be candid and rip it off like a band aid, regardless of how humiliating it would be. It was obviously necessary if their relationship should get any real chance. “I work two jobs, Roman. I don’t know how I will afford any kind of suitable christmas gift for you. I can’t go on a trip with you. I can’t afford a slip of clothing in this shops we’ve just been together.”

He hoped that he had clarified that he was dirt poor to Roman. But if his expression was anything to go by he hadn’t.

“I do know that you don’t have much money.” Roman said as if Virgil was the purposely thick one here.

“But- , how can you take me with you into those fancy as fuck shops and suggest a trip over Christmas when you know that I struggle to feed my every other week?” Virgil asked incredulously, gesturing wildly only to have Roman  catch his hands in his bigger ones.

“Virgil…” he sighed in that stinking nice voice of his, “We seem to talk past each other… I know that you struggle, okay? I know. What I do not understand is what this has to do with me taking you shopping or on a well-deserved vacation?”

Virgil's face was burning with shame and a few hot tears that had escaped. He let Roman tug him fully into an embrace, biting his lips to stifle a sob. “I can��t pay for a life with you, Roman, dammit. You don’t get that?” he whispered against the smooth, soft fabric of his boyfriend's shirt.

“Ahhh, I see.” Roman hummed, squeezing him like a plushie, kissing his hair. Dumb, big, soft man making Virgil feel so adored. “Listen V. I’m in love with you. And I don’t know for the life of me where you get the idea that I’d expect you to pay for anything I invite you to. I know that money is always tight. I do have it though and not through any of my own earning. You don’t, not through any of your own fault. Please let me take care of you.”

“I’m not some kind of gold digger!” Virgil mumbled angrily, trying to get an arms length away from Roman.

“Yeah, that much is obvious.” Roman frowned at a loss of how to express what he was thinking about their situation. 

“I don’t need you to take care of me! I’ve done that my whole life!” he hissed as quietly as he could manage.

“I know that too, V. Honestly, I do know because I see you struggle and work yourself to the bone and barely ever get enough sleep, I see you worrying yourself sick. I know you can take care of yourself because you always had to, okay? But you don’t need to now? Don’t be so proud. You worked so hard for so long, you can take a break and let me give you nice things and take care for a hot minute. I want to. In fact, nothing would make me happier.”

Virgil could just stare at him, stunned until a fresh wave of tears and emotions hit him like a sledgehammer. “But- but..?!”

“Nuh uh. Not but. It’s that easy, Baby: I love you. I want to be happy and healthy and revered. I have money and you don’t through some crude joke of the universe. Nothing more to it, no guilt, no complicated feelings about it.”

“It’s not so easy!” Virgil sniffed a little pathetic when he was pulled against Romans chest again, probably ruining that silk shirt for good with his eyeliner. 

“Uhm yeah, it is. So easy. I think I need to show you how easy it is.” 

Virgil giggled, a little desperate, exhausted and teary but how could he not? This dumb oaf was annoyingly lovable. (And kind and sexy.)  

Roman grinned into Virgil's hair when he heard him bubble with soft laughter. “Okay yeah, that sounds good, yes? So here is what we are going to do: I’m going to go get you the chocolate muffin you’ve been looking at earlier, - don’t think that I don’t know that you haven’t had any lunch- , and once you’ve eaten I’m going to two more shops with you. And I’m going to buy you things and you are not allowed to object to any of them, except for you finding them hideous. Deal?”

“I- what? No! That sounds like a blanket permi-” Virgil protested tiredly.

“It’s a test run, Virgil. We need to test under realistic circumstances and see what we come up with, yeah. Then we can verify how easy it is.”

He gave in. Well, because, how could he not. The muffin tasted good and felt good in his empty stomach and he blushed a little when this already seemed to make his boyfriend so freaking happy.

And when he was driven home that night with bags full of a whole new winter wardrobe and a huge new snuggle blanket and there were some unpleasant feelings bubbling up about it, he was kissed breathless and fed with murgh makhani until there was nothing but warmth left.

“Wonderful day. Loved that.“ Roman sighed as he cradled Virgil's body close to snuggle him more thoroughly. He hummed, drowsy and sleepy from the food and the master tier cuddling he was receiving.

Romans heart almost couldn’t take the adorableness. “Great, since you are agreeing I declare the test run a wild success.” he whispered, grinning when he could hear the soft snores coming from his boyfriend.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁

Dec 2: Gingerbread Rating: E

Janus comes home from a long business trip, stressed and burnt out to a nicely decorated house, the smell of gingerbread and his very lovely husband.

It had started to snow on his way home from the airport. Very cliché and terribly romantic. Patton was probably delighted and stoked for the possibility of actually white Christmas. Janus smiled to himself. He had missed him so much it was pathetic. 

His new job had taken him away from home for four weeks at the time when Patton had finally taken over the bakery from his grandparents and he should have been home to support him through this extremely busy time. But Patton had convinced him to take the promotion he had been offered and everything that entailed.

So through the last four weeks they both mostly had shattering, busy days and lonely nights with just sleepy phone calls to tide them over. But now he was on his way back home, on his last mile over snowy roads and one day earlier than Patton was expecting him too.

The house was decorated with soft yellow lights like something out of a corny christmas movie. It was amazing.

Janus paid the taxi driver and got out. Immediately the thick snow flakes stuck to his coat, hat and hair when he made his way to the entrance. There was light on in the kitchen, so Patton had taken his advice and had gone home before nightfall for once. He fished his key out of his inside pocket and unlocked the door as quietly as humanly possible.

There was a rush of warmth when he stepped inside silently, shutting the door behind him. He quickly stepped out of his boots, discarded coat and hat, slipped out of his gloves and suit jacket.

There was a very distinctive smell wafting through the house. Gingerbread. Janus loved Gingerbread. And Patton was making some for him despite probably being a tired ball of adorableness and having worked almost non-stop for the last weeks. 

He sneaked down the hallway towards the kitchen. Patton was humming along with the christmas songs playing quietly on his phone. Janus leaned on the wall outside, right next to the entrance to their open kitchen, listening and breathing in the aroma. If this were a mushy christmas story he would have said that his heart was full. He smiled to himself, good thing that his reddened cheeks were clearly from the cold outside.

Just when he decided that it was high time now to kiss and embrace him, Patton was taking the baking tray out of the oven and the smell intensified. Also Janus got a few seconds to just look at his unaware husband.

The stress was visible in Patton's face and tired eyes. He was flushed from baking, there was a bit of flour in his hair and he was obviously the best thing that had ever happened to mankind. Janus just stood right there in the entrance, watching with his head tilted lightly, waiting patiently and silently to be acknowledged.

Which was obviously a huge mistake. Patton got startled so bad that he let go of the tray, which thankfully clattered only a few inches down onto the countertop. It took one gasping breath until he realised who was standing in his kitchen. 

“J-Janus..?”

Janus was over in a few long strides when he heard Patton's voice wobble like that and a few seconds later could see the tears accompanying them.

“Ohh, oh no..no Baby, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you!” He murmured gently, taking the other man into his arms.

“You’re home…” Patton sniffled into his shoulder softly, taking a few deep breaths, before suddenly pushing away from him a tiny bit, eyes uge with surprise, “You’re home!” Patton swatted his arm lightly, grinning but still teary eyed. “You can’t startle me like that, you ass!”

“I’m sorry, love. I didn’t mean to.” he murmured, taking the other man back into his arms fully, kissing his cheek.

“ ‘s okay, I’m just tired and yeah..” Patton mumbled, muffled against his dress-shirt.

“I missed you so.” Janus sighed, tipping his husband's head up to finally press a kiss to his lip. He held his face cupped gently after, continuing to kiss his cheeks and nose and brow and forehead. “You can’t imagine how much I missed your adorable face.” 

Patton chuckled, having closed his eyes under the gentle onslaught. “I missed you too..so much Janus. Let’s not do this again too soon okay?” Janus just nodded before pressing another kiss to sweet, pink lips, squeezing his lovely spouse even closer before deepening it. He tasted exactly like Janus had expected. Slippery warm, spicy, sugary goodness. And he was clinging to him, holding him just as close as he was holding him.

When they parted, they both panted softly, smiling as they rested their foreheads against each other. 

“You made me Gingerbread…” Janus grinned smugly, like the proud, lovesick trophy husband that he was. Patton, who was the absolute best pastry chef and baker far and wide, had taken the time, after his incredibly busy days, and spent extra hours on his feet, in the kitchen to bake for him. Allow Janus the smugness. But also the worry. Because Patton definitely should be on the sofa, snuggled up with chinese take out instead of working even more.

“It needs to cool down a little more...I only expected you tomorrow.”

“You must be aching, love.” Janus frowned, tracing Patton’s cheekbone and watching his eyes flutter close again as he soaked up the endearment. "Mmhhhh yeah, but it's okay, we've the holidays now to relax.." 

"We do, and you should really use them to relax, you look exhausted.." 

"Not sure if I should be insulted?" Patton huffed a laugh. 

"Want me to order food? So you can jump in the shower quickly?" Janus asked, brushing through Patton's soft hair. 

"Am I smelly?" Patton furrowed his brow, trying to smell himself. He'd been up and about for many hours, been baking and organizing and obviously had been rather sweaty. 

Janus laughed, pushing his face into Patton's neck to brazenly lick a stripe up to his ear. He shuddered and goosebumps were breaking out his arms when Janus laughed darkly into his ear. "Baby...don't play coy with me, hm. We both know that I love how you smell and that it turns me on. Just thought you would want to relax a little under the water." 

They ended up doing exactly that. Patton padded upstairs with an adorable blush on his cheeks to have a nice, hot shower and Janus ordering takeout and smuggling his suitcase and with it, Patton's Christmas presents into their bedroom. 

The shower had been a brilliant idea. Patton had been incredibly tense and standing under the warm stream really helped his soreness. It also helped that he could hear Jan clattering in their adjoining bedroom. That was soothing and lovely and just <i>good.</i> Patton had missed him so much and having him back at home gave him a peace nothing else could. 

"Sweet thing I'm waiting downstairs in case the food comes. Take your time." 

Not half an hour later saw them curled into the same corner of their huge sofa, both clad in soft flannel pyjamas . Jan's long legs left and right of Patton and the Lo Mein precariously balanced between them. And finally they had some time to just vent about the last weeks.

 Patton told about how is Grandparents just couldn't let go and were head butting in on his decisions for the bakery, even though that officially resigned and handed over. And how everything was kind of tense because they couldn't accept him making decisions now. Jan just was tired of the missing competency in his new Department and how much time he had to invest to implement a new structure.

It just felt good, comfortable and familiar. Both of them just relaxed in each other's company while eating. Patton was always amazed how even a short span of time spent with only Janus could recharge him so fast even though he had been downright exhausted before. Which, he still was. But he felt about a thousand times lighter than before his husband had come home. 

Once they had diminished the noodles, Janus took Patton's feet into his lap and just leaned back closing his eyes. When Patton wiggled his toes he huffed a laugh before he gave in and gentle rubbed them. 

“Oohh..this is so nice…” Patton mumbled, positively melting into the cushions. Janus grinned a little and carefully pressed his thumbs to the sole, kneading steadily.

“<i>Holy fuck</i>, Jan! So good…!” Patton downright moaned, back arching a little.

“Now you’re just trying to turn me on.” Janus deadpanned, turning his head to look at his very pretty spouse, not ceasing his massage.

“Maybe..is it working?” 

Jan could only laugh again as Patton sleepily blinked up at him with heavy lidded eyes from where he had slipped down. He gently pressed his feet down into his lap to let Patton feel his half-hard dick. “Absolutely.” he said solemnly, “But I think you are very tired now, are you Baby?”

“Hhhmm”, Patton frowned thoughtfully, his brain a little mushy from that heavenly massage, “But I want naked snuggles?”

“How about I carry you upstairs, suck your pretty cock and then we’re having some Gingerbread in bed?” Janus suggested and got prompt, enthusiastic nodding from Patton. “Okay, grab two and up we go.”

Hoisting the shorter man up on his hips was as easy as ever. He nuzzled happily into Patton's neck, holding him securely against himself, the others penis trapped between them as they climbed the stairs slowly.

“Is that huge dick hard for me, love?” Janus cooed softly, “I wanna ride it so bad, gotta have you inside of me first thing in the morning…”

“Your mouth is filthy!” Patton whined, hips rolling against his husband's stomach on their own accord. 

“What are you going to do about it?” Janus asked smugly, letting Patton bounce on their bed, coaxing an adorable little shriek from him, “Stuff it full of dick, Baby? I’d love that.”

Patton let the gingerbread fall to the bed and hid his face in his hands groaning. “ You’re incorrigible!”

“Yeah. But you love my dirty mouth and me.” Janus agreed easily, opening the knot on Patton's pants to tug them down and be rewarded with the hard cock he'd been yearning for, slapping heavily onto his lover's belly. “There we go…”

He was pretty sure he wouldn’t like giving head so much if it weren’t Patton. But as it were, they had both lucked out. Because the other man tasted so good and made all the perfect little breathy sounds Janus adored. And judging by how heavy and hot his balls felt he really, really enjoyed being swallowed down just as much.

With Patton's hands in his hair, cock stretching his lips and the smell of them all around Janus lost himself so fast. He didn’t even register rutting against the sheets or Pattons soft tugging to warn him. He came as soon as warm, sticky come flooded his mouth and throat. A lot of it, he couldn’t swallow all of it, letting it dribble down his chin, growling and sucking his love dry while his own orgasm tore through him. 

“Dear God, I love you…” he croaked, throat a little sore and grinned up at his husband's fucked out face.

“You’re a mess..c’mere..?” Patton coaxed him up his body and surprised by being a horny little pervert. He used the gingerbread to scoop up some of the spunk dripping down Jans chin to take a bite and offer the rest to him. “I didn’t get to decorate before you came home, did I?”

Janus' brain was short circuiting and if he hadn’t had an orgasm literally right before this he would have been hard again this instant. As it was, he just took the gingerbread, eating under Patton's heated gaze. “Fuck Jan...this was definitely one of my better ideas. You taste so lovely, Darling, don’t you think?”

In all honesty, he did not think much with his fried, tired brain that wasn’t related to absolutely worshipping Patton. However...he could only agree: It did taste <i>good.</i>. Salty and sweet and a little forbidden. He did like spunk on it’s own just fine but this had really been next level.

Shaking crumbs out of their sheets the next morning had never been this hot.

[deviantofthemind]

Sanders Sides Ficmas 2020

↪ 𝔉𝔦𝔠𝔪𝔞𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔱 🎁

Dec 1: Snowed in Rating: T

Logan accompanied Roman on a Dragonwitch coven stalk out. They end up trapped in an old hunting cabin by a snowstorm in the middle of the imagination with nothing to entertain them for the next 24 hours. Roman grows very interested in Logan's recent reading material.

Roman sighed dramatically looking out of a small, almost completely blind window. “I apologize, I did not anticipate snowfall this heavy and sudden.”

Logan was not fazed or mad in the slightest, he would still get the required data when the snow storm was over and they could continue their stalk out. He was very pleased that Roman had been amenable to taking him to the Imagination with him.

Since they had become aware that there were other sides that they still didn’t know about, Logan was relentlessly researching in all possible directions. Villains that could have been built up in the Imagination itself or true Sides that had grown unnoticed by them and fueled by outside influence.

“We should probably make a fire if we are going to be stuck here for a while.” he knelt down by the small fireplace to stack some of the thankfully dry wood.

Roman was igniting the fire with a small flick of his wrist. The hut was now lit in a soft, orange glow and no more of the dark blue night was creeping in. Enough light to read for Logan, perfect. No time would be wasted. He hung up their wet coats to dry while the other man rummaged through the cabinets likely in search of food.

“At least we won’t be going hungry waiting the worst out here.” Roman said, “And it’s good to have you with me this time.”

“Is this happening regularly? I mean, that you get stuck in the imagination due to weather conditions?” Logan specified his question, “We always assumed that you just get caught up in certain adventures.”

“No, usually I have pretty good control over the..uh, conditions? It’s just gotten a little unpredictable a short while ago.”

Logan hummed thoughtfully, while opening a large trunk next to the door. “Considering the Imagination is directly tied to your state of mind, wouldn’t it be logical to assume that some personal or emotional turmoil is responsible for the recent anomalies?”

Roman hesitated to answer. Of course Logan was already connecting dots, clever as always. “Uh...I guess?” he said as noncommittally as possible, busying himself with the search for a bucket to fetch some snow for water from outside.

When he stepped out into the cold night, the snow was already piling high and the wind was lashing into his face. He quickly filled the bucket and closed the shutters around the hut.

Logan found some huge, scratchy wool blanket and a huge linen shirt amongst other things going through the chest. He was very curious about what could have the potential to confuse his friend enough that it influenced the Imagination in such a way. But he had learned the hard way that his blunt way of causal investigation was not always appreciated. Was almost never appreciated in fact. Roman had not volunteered any further insight, so it could either be that he thought it was none of Logan's business or that he didn’t trust him enough yet. He could at least work on the second option and not be immediately intrusive and annoying he guessed.

Roman pressed the door close again with quite a bit of force against the wind and bolted it shut. The fire had already warmed the tiny room considerably compared to outside.

“Okay. Looks like we are going to be reasonably safe here.” he announced, bringing his findings over to the cot by the fire, “You can even change into that dry shirt I’ve found so you won’t catch a cold.” 

Roman set the snow down by the fire to be melted soon. Turning slowly he fidgeted a bit. He was cold and his shirt was soaked where he had slipped into a snowdrift earlier in an effort to save Logan from exactly that. Stripping was not something he hadn’t anticipated for their trip. And he couldn’t say that he was very eager to get naked in front of his crush either. But well, cold. And also the other man looked at him expectantly.

He hurried, trying to make it as quick and ordinary as possible. Of course he got stuck in his sleeves and had difficulty getting the wet garments of his skin. He was flushed, embarrassed and shivering by the time he managed.

Meanwhile Logan observed. It was a well-known fact that Roman was the tallest, and broadest out of the Sides but he hadn’t anticipated him to look this, what was the vocab again…, <i>shredded</i>? His skin looked very soft and tanned even in Winter and Logan was surprised by the impulsive want to touch. Usually one wasn’t projecting such things onto one's friends. He had to monitor and manage this better. “You are very attractive.”

Romans head whipped around so fast his neck cracked. He hoped desperately that it was too dark and his former flush was too distracting to see the immediate blush Logan's compliment had brought to his cheeks. “Th-thanks?” He felt like a blubbering idiot, but in all honesty he felt more often than not like a blubbering idiot when the other man was involved. So that’s that.

“I apologize if I made you uncomfortable. I- uhm..yeah.” Logan handed over the shirt quickly and turned away. Roman could be mistaken but he thought he’d seen a slight shimmer of red in his face too. Maybe? It was unrealistic of course but may? If there was a possibility?

“Do you maybe want some tea? I think we could use something to warm us up?” he asked, deciding for the distraction and also because he was a little concerned. He had towed Logan along, hiking through the rough landscape all day after all, he was likely cold and exhausted.

“Yes, please, I would appreciate it.” Logan said, back to his sober self after a short-moment of fluster he had experienced when being confronted with Roman’s physique.

He settled in front of the fireplace as Roman filled a pot with snow, searched for mugs and dug out a small tin of herbs from his satchel. Groaning softly, he kicked off his shoes and socks, to stretch out and warm his aching feet. Conjuring his recent reading material to keep busy was the logical next step.

Soon after Roman plopped down next to him, sans his usual elegance. He put the steaming mugs down in front of them carefully. 

“Thank you. It smells very pleasant.” Logan sighed, breathing in the tea.

Again Roman could feel the warmth in his cheeks, damn his greedy idea to spend time alone with Logan. He rolled his sore shoulders, mumbling a ‘welcome’ before also getting rid of his shoes. 

It was strangely nice to sit together in front of the fire and just relax a bit after their day. But Roman still felt a little guilty for the weather trapping them in the Imagination longer as both of them had planned. Still, Roman relished the moment. Sitting close to an unusual relaxed Logan, being able to provide for him even a teeny tiny bit, no one interrupting. He even dared to watch Logan. The other had ditched his usual attire for something more practical and warm and he looked very cosy and warm and cuddly and touchable and...Roman was getting carried away and needed to hide his face behind his mug again.

“So uhm, what are you reading?” he asked softly, as not to disturb the calm atmosphere. And Logan looked up at him and <i>smiled</i> and Roman had to take another sip to hide for a second.

Setting his book aside momentarily and also cradling the tea, Logan turned to Roman. “I’ve been researching about other possible sides,” he said excitedly, “So far I could only rule out possible manifestations though. And unfortunately I think this also is the case with Lust or respectively Desire, which this book is about.”

Roman cursed as he accidentally took a too large sip of the scalding tea. “L-lust?” he sputtered, blinking at Logan confused and suspicious. Could it be that? No. Just, no.

“Yes… I mean, it seemed like a viable theory?” Logan confirmed a little insecure, shrugging.

Roman didn’t dare check but he was pretty sure he was blushed down to his navel by now. “But you did rule that out now? Why?” he asked instead, as steady as he could manage (He was quite proud of himself) and nervously tugged the revealing shirt close.

Logans took a long time to formulate a response he deemed honest but not too blunt. He was trying to win Romans friendship, not alienate him. “Well, usually when we do something, the one at the core of this function, erhm, pops up?” he adjusted his glasses, “Like Janus comes out when one of us is intentionally lying?” He waited for Roman to nod and allowed himself to just relish being so attentively listened to for a moment. “But, from what I read, we’ve been dealing with Desire but an appearance was never made.” Logan could have hit himself, again. Because that had obviously been the most stupid way to word that particular fact.

His mind was reeling, because <i>holy shit</i>, was Logan saying what Roman thought he was saying? “I’m- I’m not sure I can follow you?” he leaned a bit closer, as if guarding the words between them, “So you say Desire is not a full Side because...well because we’ve been experiencing it?” Swallowing heavily, a little choked with his own bravery, he looked back into Logan's eyes.

There was a hot little pit in his stomach because it seemed he might have been misinterpreting quite a lot of information regarding Romans and his friendship and it seemed the other man had now decided for both of them that it was time for a leap of faith instead of further analysis.

“According to the book <i>I</i> certainly have.” he said, “And I think I misjudged the ability for Desire and friendship to coexist or I maybe would have come to this conclusion sooner.”

Romans breath shuddered out of him, a heady mix of joy and relief and <i>Desire</i>. Logan looked awfully insecure and Roman gave him all the time to pull back before he finally received a tiny nod and allowed himself to press his lips to Logan's cheekbone.

They both laughed a little breathless. Yeah. Desire was definitely not a Side.

There were few more words exchanged as they prepared something to eat together, just slow, tentative smiles and the freedom of deliberately brushing against the others body. 

Later they dared to slip under the blanket together and Logan couldn’t have named the sort of feeling that was compelling him, begging him to press his whole body against Roman as the man curled his body around him.

Roman tentatively nuzzled into Logan's shoulder, relaxing and rubbing his nose along his neck, pressing a soft kiss there too when the other man sighed softly. 

“You know...I never would have thought-..” he interrupted himself, unsure of what he actually wanted to say.

“Yeah, me neither, “ Logan answered into the soft peaceful darkness, “Sometimes, I think, I may be thinking too much…”

[deviantofthemind]

Sugar Burn 12

→  Masterpost / Part 11 

The next morning was the first time since the storms descended that it actually dawned and morning light pierced through the shutters to wake Patton. The house was still quiet, which was probably good and meant actual sleep for certain people.

He turned to face Roman. Breathing evenly, jaw unclenched for the first time since this ordeal had started. He didn’t let much of it on but he was incredibly hurt. But Patton knew. Roman had been the one to bring Janus home after all. Had been his first, friend and lover. And the Imagination was in many parts, his responsibility. 

Roman had chewed his lips while sleeping, they were cherry red and a little puffy and Patton was glad that he seemed to have found a more restful sleep. He still kinda waited for something to happen, for him to lash out or break down or do something equally as stupid as Janus or on Janus’ behalf. 

Patton sighed and slipped out of bed. He opened the window and shutter as quietly as possible and was confronted with a much too peaceful winter wonderland. White, fluffy snow, up so high that their front was probably impassable. The air felt icy and biting, the temperatures well below freezing. it would stay that way until March at least, he just hoped there would not be another storm.

Shivering he closed the window again, checked if Roman was still asleep and kissed his adorable bedhead before leaving the room.

He passed by Logan's door, still closed, silence behind it. He could imagine very well what had happened after his request yesterday night. His stomach was up in tight knots about it but he would have never said it if he didn’t think it was necessary. He could deal with the guilt over what it had cost Logan and meant for Janus. But he wouldn’t be able to deal with losing one of them.

He didn’t think that any of them had grasped the concept of them, really. They had barely functioned before Janus came to them. And he even remembered a time when without Logan, without Remus. Times when they were blandly destructive for each other, driven, restless and unhappy. They only worked like they were now and Patton would make sure everyone of them would understand, sooner or later.

Virgil was practically curled around Janus, clutching onto him with cramped fingers twisted in the other's shirt. Pattons heart hurt just from looking at them. He wished he could give them something, use his ability and give them something good. But he had nothing. He was needed one time and he couldn’t come up with anything since everything was so muddled with everyone hurting. But maybe, this was the key?

Janus, ever the lightest sleeper, woke up when Patton  started to work very quietly in the kitchen. The sigil in his neck smarted with the fresh burn and the implications coming with it. No escape. For now, Logan had him completely incapacitated, stripped of his option to go. And not deal with pain of the inevitable any longer.

Virgil still held him like this meant nothing, and he still could vanish at any time. He couldn’t quite understand what they were aiming at with all of this. And he was, frankly, just exhausted and too drained to think about it. 

Getting up was a bit of a chore, extricating his sore limbs from Virgil's death grip and leaving the other man sleeping while at it turned into a challenge. But he needed to ask Patton what he was to think about everything. What this was about, if this was a punishment, if they wanted more information.

“Hey..?” he called out softly upon entering the kitchen, to alert the other man.

Patton whipped around immediately when he heard that distinctive soft but hearse voice. “Janus..are you okay?” he asked, a little startled.

He awkwardly cleared his throat, coming a few steps closer but not too close, he needed at least the possibility and freedom to slip from the room if he wanted.

“Yeah..good. I slept.” he answered noncommittally, “I wanted to ask- you something?”

This was starting out exactly as painful as Patton had imagined it would be. The distance Janus had deliberately put between them. The uncharacteristic speech pattern. He wanted to hug him so bad.

TBC

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[deviantofthemind]

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ fuck ♥

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