fragilelittlething

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

I wish I could erase 2022 from my memory.

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

I wish I could go back to when my mom got pregnant with me and let her know it’s not worth it. Just abort me please.

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

I'm going insane again and I don't know where to go. It's obviously not normal to think about suicide but it's the only thing that's in my mind right now ever since I woke up. Life is just scary for me and I can't help but think of unaliving myself so I can escape from this hell called life. Everyone else I know is having fun, with goals in their mind but I'm just here waiting to get really sick or terminally ill. I wanted to post my thoughts on Reddit but I couldn't post anything there. Bruh I was even banned from r/suicidewatch where people I can relate to actually exist. I have no one to talk to. I can't say this to all the people close to me because they obviously would worry. I'm alone in my dorm and because of it, I thought of committing suicide here. But I don't have a rope and there's really nothing here which could hold the rope. All these suicidal ideations are making me dizzy. Oh how I wish someone would just shoot me right now. I don't want to hear suicidal thoughts from my own brain anymore. I'm sick. I'm so mentally ill. Can someone please shoot me

[fragilelittlething]

#me

just had a realization. if you're heavily distressed every day. i think... i think that's called living in crisis. that's not normal. that's not healthy. that's an urgent health concern. you deserve better...

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

Last year, I made a post about how hopeless because I had DPDR. Now, I'm coming back here to say that I'm BETTER now and I don't experience DPDR symptoms anymore. So if you're feeling stuck because of your DPDR or any sort of mental illness, please know that you'll feel alright someday or soon. I'm now feeling more hopeful that I'll get my degree this year and that I won't be admitted in a psych ward. Also, I have a boyfriend now, and he accepts me for who I am despite my mental illness. That's all, folks. It doesn't mean that I'm not suicidal anymore. I still am. I still think I'm better off dead. But at least, I've gotten better. That's what matters the most. Someday, maybe I'll eventually stop being suicidal. But for now, I live with my thoughts of death every day. I'm healing though. And I hope you too.

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

Fuck my depression is trying to sabotage me again

[fragilelittlething]

I deserve sleep

[fragilelittlething]

Dear diary...

I'm lost. I'm hopeless. I'm scared. And I don't know what to do.

I'm just a lost empty ghost wandering in this endless void with nowhere to go.

[fragilelittlething]

[fragilelittlething]

I don't know what would happen but someone said I'd die on Dec. 15th and that someone is me. I've promised myself I'd never do it again. So probably I'll get really sick that even meds won't work. So I have 9 days left. Soon I'll be gone. I'd tell God to let me catch a fatal bacterial meningitis. Dying really makes me feel at peace everytime I think about it. I just hope it comes for me soon. Others avoid death but I beg for it. I want to die soon. I don't want to be here anymore. Please God talk to me even just in my dreams. Grant my wish please. I really want to talk to you. I really want you to talk to me and tell me that it will be alright soon because I'm gonna get meningitis soon and it will kill me in my sleep. Please. 🙏