freddiefcknmercury

[freddiefcknmercury]

do u ever get a comment on a fic thats just so sweet that ur like Maybe slaving over 24k of fanfiction was worth it for user SprinkleTrashcan2012 to leave a three paragraph comment

[freddiefcknmercury]

Long time no see👀

I've been thinking about posting some smut soon and disappearing again.

All in favour say: 🥸

[freddiefcknmercury]

Long time no see🌚

It's September and I'm actually in a semi decent place with life! So much so that I am considering doing my Fic-tober writing challenge again this year! If you're interested in participating or just seeing me post here again please give this post some love and reply with your fave spooky/autumn/October words so I can throw them in a randomised selector in a few weeks✨

Gonna try to write at least 600 words a piece and do one piece a week for the month of October

[freddiefcknmercury]

I "finished" editing but I'm not exactly confident in it still so I'm holding off for a while... surprise drop coming eventually 🌚

So

I've been editing this same fic for months now, mostly bc it's one of my private fandoms and I'm nervous to share it publicly... but I'm going to sit down and breathe and attempt to actually post it Wednesday at some point. I really like it and I hope yall do as well ✨

[freddiefcknmercury]

So

I've been editing this same fic for months now, mostly bc it's one of my private fandoms and I'm nervous to share it publicly... but I'm going to sit down and breathe and attempt to actually post it Wednesday at some point. I really like it and I hope yall do as well ✨

[freddiefcknmercury]

Joel x Male reader - Frustration Overload

Warnings: Stressed out reader, self-inflicted harm (hitting yourself, clawing yourself), angst and fluff, pet names, extremely soft!Joel (might be out of character but idc I need me a man like this), lots of kisses and reassurance

Summary: Reader has chronic pain and fatigue, tries to carry on with life but after a bad week of work and making mistakes someone comments and makes you feel worse. You’re frustrated, tired and in pain. You need release and are a bit reckless. Joel comes home early from patrol and looks after you.

(A/N): This is a bit close to my heart as I’ve been in chronic pain everyday for 7 years and sometimes my frustration bubbles over and I act out like this as a distraction. Like Joel talking to people about the frustration and getting help is always better than letting it bottle up. Sorry for this “Self indulgent fic”

You had been in chronic pain for a good part of your life. Most of the time the pain was about a 5 and you could keep it under control and not let anyone outside of Joel know. You didn’t want to be looked down upon, asked overly personal questions or not be believed. Some days your joints were so painful that you could barely walk or your back would go trying to pick up your laundry. But it wasn’t just the pain and mobility issues, all of your energy you had your body tried to use in healing itself so you were left knackered. Sadly pain means that you can’t sleep and the less you sleep the more pain you feel, it was a vicious cycle.

Joel was your best friend and boyfriend. He looked after you throughout the pain and frustration even if you lashed out. He understood in his own way and he just wanted to help anyway he could. You were incredibly hard on yourself, you didn’t want to ever use the pain as an excuse. Especially after what a lot of people had to go through with the outbreak. Most of the time you let your feelings build up until you cracked because you didn’t want to burden your loving caring boyfriend.

This had led you to now. You were a month into a flare up and there was nothing you could do but let it take its course. First couple weeks were manageable but the last 2 weeks you had only been getting a few hours of sleep a night, restless to the point you sneaked out of the house with your walking stick to take a walk. You had mobility aids for the bad days but you didn’t want to use them in front of other people so you’d only bring it out when the streets were empty or if you and Joel were together. Joel had been helping as much as possible, talking with Tommy and making sure you weren’t on patrols for the time being. You were exhausted.

With no sleep, no energy and pain this week had been hell. You kept making mistakes, working at the bar for a night and dropping a glass, working at the clinic and not getting all the file notes for the doctor in time. Now you were working at the stables today, you were exhausted. “y/n…. y/n……..Y/N!” Dan the guy who ran the stable shouted at you. You finally snapped out of your head and tried to walk as normal as possible. “I need you to get the hay bales from stores and put a new one in Shimmers stable and feed Callus.” He told you.

You hadn’t paid 100% attention and now hauling a heavy bale towards the stable flared up all the nerves in your back and leg. You were getting a bit disoriented and you completely forgot who needed what. You ended up putting the bale in Callus’ pen in the stable and feeding shimmer. As you were feeding her and petting her muzzle, Dan approached you.

“Y/N you keep fucking up, go home you’re useless!” He shouted at you. “Wait what the fuck?! Why I did what you told me?!” You took a step back shocked. “No you fed shimmer when I told you to feed Callus, now she’s had twice the amount of food, Callus has had nothing and now we’ve wasted a hay bale too. Just get out of my sight” he scoffed at you.

You nodded mutely keeping the tears behind your eyes until you were far enough away. You hobbled your way home, you were in excruciating pain and you were frustrated. You were strong, capable and useful but maybe Dan was right. You kept messing up, you were a fuck up, you were useless. And you would continue to be.

By the time you got home you were sobbing in frustration, pain, sleep deprivation and self loathing. You were in the living room sitting on the sofa sobbing, milling over your thoughts. You felt pathetic and wanted to stop feeling this current pain. You were scratching at your legs and arms trying to focus on that and try to stop the tears . You kept rubbing and palming at your eyes with one hand. The frustration was too much and you needed the thoughts to stop. You used the other hand to hit against your temple gently to begin with and then getting more rough.

Before you could cause any marks or any rough damage to yourself, your arms were seized from your face. You flinched and try to back away, not having the capacity to recognise the concerned eyes looking back at you straight away through the tears. Joel pressed a kiss to your hand “Hey, Hey it’s me it’s Joel you’re ok” he said soothingly. You had been so in your own head you hadn’t realised he’d come home from patrol and entered the house. “J-joel… I’m” you tried to explain and say you were sorry but the pain and emotions caused the sobbing to re-intensify.

Joel sat on the sofa and pulled your form to him gently knowing that you were in a lot of pain. You were crying into his shoulder and massaged you back soothingly. “It’s ok I got you, I’ve got you” he whispered and kissed your hair. After a few minutes you calmed down and stopped crying. You felt very embarrassed for your actions so you tried to wriggle out of his embrace and avoid looking at him.

He hugged you closer with one arm and the other hand lifted your chin towards him. “Look at me darling” he spoke gently. You shook your head and closed your eyes. He’s seen this cycle a couple times before when the flare ups were bad. You felt bad and bottled it up then you started to put yourself down more and then snapped and felt completely overwhelmed and wanted to find a release for it. Then you would be embarrassed for reacting that way. “Baby look at me, there’s no need to be embarrassed. You’re in pain, you’re rightly frustrated with it but I need to tell me exactly what’s going on in your head. What happened? And What do you need?” He leant down to meet your eyes.

“Can you help me to our bedroom first, I want to get out of these before we talk” you looked at him biting your lip. He nodded, you tried to push of the sofa but you winced and gasped at the pain. Joel stood and bent down to pick you up, “Sweetheart wrap your arms round my neck and ankles around my waist and on 3 I’ll lift you ok?” You nodded doing as he said. After 3 he lift you and though it was still painful it was better than trying to walk. He walked carefully up the stairs and laid you on the bed.

Joel moved around the room to grab you some comfy clothes as you tried to remove your current outfit. He quickly moved to help you undress while jolting you as little as possible. To try and soothe you he would kiss each piece of exposed skin as he went. When he removed your T-shirt he kissed you where your shoulder met your neck tenderly. He then put a T-shirt of his on you knowing you liked the smell of him and finding comfort in him. He removed your jeans carefully and placed a kissed on each of your knees and dressed you in a pair of his joggers. He then made his way up to kiss you sweetly on the lips. The whole process made you feel so loved.

He sat down against the headboard of the bed and parted his legs placing a pillow against his chest then moved you to press your back against the pillow and his chest. He wrapped his arms around your waist as you leant back against him. Air and a little bit of the tension left you body as you relaxed against your boyfriend.

“Now you’re more comfortable and little less overwhelmed, tell me what happened to get you in such a state?” He asked calmly placing a kiss on the temple you had only been hitting 20 minutes before. You looked down and sighed grabbing one of his hands to fiddle with while his other hand rubbed soothing patterns into your stomach with his thumb.

“Pain’s really bad again. Haven’t slept more than 4 hours across the past 3 days. I’m frustrated because I keep making mistakes. I smashed a glass at the bar because my hands were too stiff and painful. I couldn’t grab it properly. Then when I was working at clinic the doc needed his clinical notes delivered to him but I was behind on sorting all of that out. They didn’t get mad but seemed disappointed in me. Then Dan shouted and called me useless because I mixed up tasks because of the brain fog and I had to lift a heavy bale.” Joel kept quiet listening to everything you’ve been through the past few days when you sighed. He waited for you to continue now gently turning the hand he had connected to yours over so you could interlock them.

“I was frustrated anyway, I know that I’m decently smart and capable….but the pain beats me down and makes me feel worthless. I felt useless after I smashed the glass even though Seth reassured me it was ok. Then I could see the disappointment of the doc in me. Then I was confirmed to be useless by Dan.” You started to shake a bit but Joel kept you tightly wrapped up, soothing the panic and frustration bubbling back up.

“I snapped, I hobbled back home sobbing then all the thoughts about how I was useless and a waste of time, effort and love kept floating about in my head. The pain was dizzying too. So I tried to cause sharp quick pain to focus on rather than the constant pain. Then I was worried that someday you’d finally give up on me and see that I’m not worth the hassle and finally leave me. I wanted the thoughts out of my head so I started to hit my head. I know it’s stupid to have tried that but I needed it to stop even for just a minute.” Your voice cracked as you told him the truth and how you felt.

“My sweet boy, it’s not stupid, I can’t imagine exactly the pain you constantly go through. It’s not a surprise you’re frustrated. Fuck Dan, he’s an arsehole and I’ll rip him a new one when I next see him. Hurt my baby I don’t think so.” He kissed the crown of your head, gently reassuring you. “You are my good boy, you’re strong and capable. Always have been, always will be. You made a few mistakes this week in excruciating pain, no help and no sleep. You dropped a glass, I would’ve been passed out on the bar. You were behind on paper work, I wouldn’t have been able to do it. And you did tasks the wrong way round, for me that’s just an average Wednesday.” You chuckled at his last statement which made Joel smile, pleased he could make you feel better.

“What I mean to say is, you have pushed on regardless. But you’re allowed to ask for help, to stay in bed and not work when you’re in this much pain. You are not less than for needing to take breaks and rest properly. And you’re allowed to be frustrated and any other emotion. But please next time just talk to me sweetheart before it gets to much, so I can spoil you and make you feel a little bit better. You’re stuck with me I’m never going anywhere.” He smiled against your skin as he kissed your neck and felt your hand come up to his head playing with his salt and pepper locks.

“Now how’re you feeling and is there anything I can do?” He squeezed your hand then brought it up to chin to turn your head to see him and kissed the corner of your mouth.

“I’m ok, tense and an in pain. Would it be silly if I asked you to give me a massage?” You asked sheepishly. Joel smiled shaking his head “Of course I can give you a massage sugar!” He moved out from behind you gently, quickly changed out of his gear and into some comfortable sweats. You watched smiling as the love of your life got changed and found the bottle of oil that you kept for days like today or when Joel would need a massage from you after long difficult patrol. He walked over and tapped the bed, “Come on handsome lay down of your stomach for me.”

With his help you manoeuvred yourself to take of your T-shirt and lay flat against the bed, head turned to the side so you could breathe and see Joel. Joel gently straddled your back, thighs on either side of your hips and gentle to not but too much of his weight on you. He poured some oil into his hands, rubbing them together to warm it up.

He massaged your lower back firm but gently. He released a few knots in the muscles and heard a couple of clicks. You audibly gasped in relief as a little bit of tension released. He was happy he could help and placed a kiss in the middle of your spine before he continued. He continued up your back using his thumbs to work out all the tension and stiffness a much as possible.

Once he was finished with your back you went to sit up and thank him. “No baby I’m gonna your arms and backs of your legs” he whispered and gently push you back down. Before you could protest be had begone working on your arms. He continued in the same fashion of working area by area leaving kisses here and there. When he was done he helped move you onto your back before massaging a couple more areas.

You looked down at Joel, starry eyed “How did a guy like me ever get so lucky to get you?” You pondered not realising you had spoken your thoughts out loud. He met your eyes and smiled, moving towards your face. He caressed your cheek before lovingly whispering, “I think I’m the luckiest guy in the world, I love you so much.” And kissed you sweetly on the lips.

“I love more” you responded and hugged him tightly.

Once he was finished you felt like you were floating, you were a little sore but feeling much better than earlier. You both spent the rest of the day in bed cuddled up to each other telling stories of times gone by. Ones you’ve both never heard or those you’ve both heard 100 times. It didn’t matter, you both loved each other and were smiling and laughing.

“Thank you for everything you do for me, I know that I’m not the easiest person to deal with.” You told him that night snuggled into his chest. “I love you baby. You help me through so much too. We’re loving and caring for each other in sickness and in health. I’m not going anywhere” He responded rubbing your back in circles.

“I love you too” you kissed him with all the love you had in your heart. That night as you both fell asleep knew that though the world was a harsh place that the love you shared was eternal. You knew that the man you fell in love with through small but powerful actions was yours and in return you were his. To hold onto and cherish for the rest of your lives.

A/N: Hope this was okay, bit self-indulgent and I know probably quite a bit out of character for Joel. But it was nice to get my frustration out onto the page.Let me know what you think!

[freddiefcknmercury]

You ever just look at the last three sentences you've written and gagged a little?🥴

[freddiefcknmercury]

[freddiefcknmercury]

Good news everyone!

I'm forcing myself to write in 2024🥴

You WILL get more fics(whether I like them or not) and I will get through the first draft of my novel🤡

[freddiefcknmercury]

BIPOC, Latina(x), & Hispanic tag-list Pt.4 (remastered)

@punani @shereadsandwritesformelanin @imgoldielikehawn @dcuimagines @bankcease @side-shawty @marwritesgood @mythiccheroacademia @cocoacinna @animedaydreamer @freddiefcknmercury @forthecoloredgirl @ablackfangirlwrites @desiraypark @amethyst-dreams-and-candy-canes @mareethequeen @lotusss-flowerbomb @dylansbum @sapphirescrolls @bakarilennox @chaneajoyyy @sheabuttahwrites @tolkienblackgirl @stardustedangel @ufwshawtyy @mauvecherie-writes @miyuhpapayuh @henneseyhoe @lovrre @sinning-23 @spideryves @thebearer @stxrkiss @tokyosk @harlowsbby @slashisms @slasherscream @ttheriddlerr @vulcanupthatbitch @suekeyyyy @vampireimiko @grandslamkingston-archive @555sage @kyleoreillylover @blueaetherr @vampiremillk @v-era-18 @rimaiahwrites @inklore

[freddiefcknmercury]

Hey y'all I'm still very much unemployed and I have so many bills to pay still✨

So I really don't like to do this but I've been unemployed for the last few months and trying to slowly sell off my stuff to pay rent and fix my car. If you've ever read my fics and and enjoyed them or just really want to help me out this would be a really great time💚

My rent is due to tomorrow which is very short and I have to help out a friend in a few weeks so I also have travel expenses so literally anything would help right now. Thanks so much to all of y'all for being here this whole time

Venm: @ksmchooligan

Cshapp: $beefjerkyinaballgown

[freddiefcknmercury]

Golden Brown

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/reader & Sam Wilson/reader

-Female coded reader

Word count: 800+

Warnings/disclaimer: Smut; penetration. That's really it lol. General reference to a poly relationship. Also maybe skip if you lactose or gluten free🤡

A/N: .....It's just smut lol. People asked for Anotha One to 'Grey' so here ya go.

Summary: Late night snack turns into a late night snack.

~*As always, be Nice to me I'm delicate*~

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

It's late.

Too late to be eating anything at all, but you can't sleep. This grilled cheese though, it'll fix you.

Even pulled the fancy cheese out of the fridge, the expensive ones you have to slice yourself and put it on some of the sexy bread Sam brought home yesterday. The fresh loaves with soft pillowy insides and a gorgeous crusty outside that you have to squeeze each time you get it.

If you love yourself you butter both sides of the bread.

You find a small pan and place it over the hob, letting it click a few times waiting for the flames to appear. After beginning to arrange the cheeses precisely on the bread you notice movement coming from around the corner.

Bucky still somewhat sleepily walking into the kitchen, catching you red handed at the stove after 2am. You freeze for just a moment, fully prepared for a halfhearted lecture about 'already not getting enough sleep', but decide to continue preparing your not quite breakfast anyway.

Silently he places a slightly cool metal hand on the small of your back before carefully wrapping it around you under your shirt, pressing the pads of his fingers firmly against your stomach. Resting his face against your shoulder, you feel him studying your movements for a beat before watching him turn the burner you meant to use off.

You shift slightly, turning to look at him inquisitively. After a firm squeeze of each of your shoulders he steps aside and lightly pushes into the centre of your chest with a single finger, suggesting you backwards into the kitchen island with a soft thud. Resting his forehead gently against yours Bucky reaches down, hoisting you up onto the counter. You stare back at him, he hasn't said a word yet as he tugs against your waistband. You lean back onto your palms lifting your hips up slightly for him to remove the bottoms. He takes your chin in his hand, pulling on your bottom lip exposing your tongue to him. Gently he massages it with his thumb, soaking it thoroughly before reaching down to coat himself with your saliva. He takes you by the knee, staring almost flatly back at you waiting for that first gasp to escape your lips as he slides inside. Your eyes flutter just a little, it's been a while since he felt so inclined... he grabs rough handfuls of flesh on your hips and pulls you flush against him with a groan. You wrap an arm around his shoulders to brace yourself, burying your free hand in his hair as you both rock into the island. Soft groans and whimpers fill the dimly lit kitchen for what feels like an hour when you feel a soft finger being dragged along your arm.

Sam silently leans against the island next to you, Bucky doesn't seem to notice, or couldn't care less if he does. Sam tenderly pushes the hair out of your face and squeezes the apple of your cheek with a soft smirk. You feel your face get hot; embarrassed isn't the right word for the feeling you get seeing one of your boyfriends still look at you so fondly while the other one rails you in the kitchen in front of him in the middle of the night. Your eyes follow him as Sam walks over to the stove and clicks the fire back on.

Bucky feels your focus shift off him and pushes you flat onto your back, the cold surface just a bit exhilarating. He pulls you all but into his lap, your fingers gripping the edge of the counter. He kisses your stomach before reaching up to your tongue again, more desperate this time, almost frantic. He uses that thumb to gingerly massage your clit as he drills into you. He groans deep in his chest and you hear a soft sizzle coming from behind him but you're too far along to concentrate on anything else now. Your back arches and the world goes silent as Bucky pushes you over, his hand still feels determined to make you black out. You take several deep ragged breaths while struggling to grab his wrist and make him stop. Sam reaches over into a cabinet to pull down your favourite plate and you hear the burner click again. Bucky grips both hips and buries himself into you with a single raspy:

"Fuck..."

You whimper to the feeling of him twitching inside. Sam walks around the island behind you placing your food and a damp cloth off to the side. Rolling your head back to look at him you see that same soft smirk. He wipes the sweat off your forehead and places a heavy palm on the center of your chest, watching you breath for a minute as Bucky carefully exits you. He squeezes your thigh and gives you a knowing look; One you still can't explain to anybody else, before taking a bite of your sandwich and leaving you to collect yourself. After lifting yourself up into your elbows Sam gives your shoulder a light squeeze as he swiftly follows after him, you immediately hear whispered bickering in the hallway. Grabbing the cloth you side eye your almost perfect grilled cheese, suddenly not very hungry anymore...

Read Grey here

[freddiefcknmercury]

✨Interest post✨

I've had a Spider-verse AU floating around in my brain for weeks now and I LOVE the idea but I'm not sure if I'd be the only person interested in this story or not...

*It would be Prowler!Hobie Brown but a version of our current Hobie with a Spidey MC.👀👀👀👀

If you respond to no other of my posts please respond to this one🥴 reply or message me- I really need the encouragement.

[freddiefcknmercury]

**Hey so I'm literally gonna post a much longer piece of work today too so like WOO! But in the middle of editing that I decided to crank this little thing out real quick before I lost it lol. I'm honestly not sure what or when or where but I thought I'd share it with y'all bc I don't know how to be hurt in private lmfao.

*Some Hobie Brown and reader interaction. Idk if it's romantic or not, if I'm gonna continue with this or not, and no it's not smut sorry y'all lol but it's definitely "~intimate" so enjoy??? It's only 500 words too🤌🏾

TW: for abuse and moderate descriptions of wounds.

••••••••••••••••••••

You excuse yourself under the guise of being injured from a fight earlier in the week. The truth is you let Miguel toss you around too hard again. You struggle to walk normally down the hallway, holding your side until you can duck into one of the barely used restrooms. Ripping a paper towel and running it under some cold water before lifting your top and pressing it against the fresh fang marks there. It's intense but soothing. You look yourself over in the mirror. The bags under your eyes, skin a bit pale, you look exhausted and you are. You hadn't noticed how dark the set of marks on your throat have gotten. You pull the collar of your suit up more to hide it, shifting as upright as possible when you finally notice Hobie standing in the archway watching you.

"Don't."

Your voice is soft but you almost bark it at him. Knowing what he has to say about your little arrangement with Miguel. And knowing you don't want to hear it from him right now.

He just rolls his shoulders, stepping closer to lift up the hem of your suit top and take a good look at the marks there. He expected teeth but the obvious finger or... claw shaped marks throw him just a little.

"Hm."

He wets another paper towel and replaces the now warm old one. He presses it firmly against you, it stings a little but you both know Hobie would never hurt you intentionally. But then he grabs your shoulder as he tugs slightly on the waistband of your pants, noticing an even older set of bruises on your hip, and a couple newer ones...

You snatch yourself away from his grip, staring deep into his eyes for a long silent moment. He drops his gaze to your throat, knowing Miguel was particularly angry yesterday so the worst of it is probably there. He steps forward in an attempt to see it up close and know just how angry he should be with him.

"Just stop Hobie."

You place your palm against his chest firmly but it doesn't deter him. He quickly pulls down the collar exposing the wound: an ugly purple black bruise with two sets of four deep distinct holes. He bit you three or four times last night, the effects from his paralysing venom still making you groggy. You hiss as his fingers graze the tender flesh and slap him across the face, taking a few steps back.

Unfazed, he steps forward again to speak into your ear.

"I don't know what he has over you, but this isn't worth it."

He pulls back looking over your face before slowly taking his exit. You grip the counter to steady yourself hearing him call back to you.

"If this escalates... I'm steppin in."

He disappears around the corner to the outside world. You don't bother protesting, knowing his mind won't be changed. Standing there you get a good look at yourself in the mirror wondering if you really are okay with this.

[freddiefcknmercury]

Y'all listen,

I wanna hop on the Hobie smut train too but literally the first thing I thought to actually write on my own was just so fucken sad and not fun at all why am I like this🥹 please forgive me

[freddiefcknmercury]

Hey y'all real quick!: I have a few "series" running here and more and more I get discouraged a lot from posting bc (as silly as it is to share solely for other's opinions)it feels like I'm the only one who likes reading them🥴lol

So if there's ANY unfinished storylines you actually wanna see more of please let me know✨

I plan on editing a few things to post and hold us over until I can feel good and start writing new works steadily again🤎

[freddiefcknmercury]

BLACK WRITERS WHO (AND THEIR PAGE) ARE STILL ACTIVE (PART 3)

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