fromluminarywhispers

[fromluminarywhispers]

hai :3 i see that ur blog is new nd i wanna b the first ask <3

hmmm, since i have the honor of being first, i’ll try to ask an interesting question ;3

what is ur greatest fear ? if that is 2 heavy, then… which do u prefer, sunrises, or sunsets? im waiting patiently for the answer <3

Hi. Knowing this much is most fortunate; I am truly grateful that you took the time to send this ask of yours, and I'm high-spirited to write back!

It's quite the honor to have you here, and I appreciate the questions. <𝟑

❝𝐆𝐨𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮.❞

My greatest fear, huh…? You see, dearest stranger, I was raised Catholic.

One would not be born with such a fear of that which we nourished and baptized as sanctitude. However, the moment whispers of faith and sin, salvation and perdition, make a hostage of their soul…

And even after abandoning the Catholic Church, the intimations percolating behind old words heard — an uneasiness passed down through generations; learned fear and self-condemnation, masked as inherent, as necessary, as good — shall remain running through their blood, resembling a curse.

God wrapped its essence, this misgiving, beneath and within the flesh of this vessel of mine — threaded and pulsating; a promise, a threat. And now, He's rotting amidst my thoracic cage; confined somewhere between that which I understand as my heart, lungs and bones, His festering has carved a cross-shaped wound that lingers, much too intimate in its nature to be escaped from. There's no healing from the withering of faith.

The Abrahamic God, and all that comes with His nature — the realization about the existence of this as my greatest fear — arises to drown the heart in the quietness of unexpectency; a phantom pain which chooses to make itself known once more without good enough reason behind its appearance. Ever present, haunting, its surviving existence concealed amidst the shadows of earthly life.

Well, and I have some extent of cleithrophobia / claustrophobia, I suppose.

I must express, I have a particular appreciation for sunsets.

Thank you so much for your patience in waiting. And know that you have my heartfelt appreciation for your time and questions! ♡︎

[fromluminarywhispers]

❝𝐠𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐚𝐰𝐧, 𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐮𝐬𝐤.❞ │ 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭.

Amidst afterglow skies, and manifested from the warm embrace of sunlight, this blog of mine comes into existence, finding itself bathed in shadows and fire; a shattered piece of this ever-expanding universe, a fragment of sacredness which I desired to create with my own hands.

You may call me Solaris, and I will be centering my attention on elements which find themselves connected to mental health — expressing excerpts of that which resides within my mind, truly.

────────── · · · · ✦ · · · · ──────────

— ˙ . ꒷ 🕸️ . 𖦹˙— TW / CW : mental illness 𐔌 Questioning NPD, depression, so on and so forth ꒱; suicidal ideation; mention of self-harm; homicidal ideation; mention of grooming; maladaptive daydreaming; gender dysphoria…