#vent account

[insignificantfailure]

Not now please I'm busy rotting in bed

[beebboopbop]

doing this so im never the fattest person in the room anymore.

im doing this so im not the girl in the one piece bathing suit. Im doing this to be able to walk into brandy or pacsun and fit in the clothes. Im doing this so I dont have to suck in my stomach to be able to look in the mirror. Im doing this so this summer I can prance around in itty bitty bikinis and be EFFORTLESSLY thin. I need to be dainty and delicate. I need the clothes fit like a glove. I need this I need this I need this

this is the year.

[su1c1d3wh0r3z]

[lunarofthevalley]

———————tw sh vent art———————

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[nosfe-ratu]

[voidlikepain]

When the sever you built a community and friends with gets deleted. Fuck you discord we were just trying to not feel alone

[thehareswears]

Tw talk of hypersexuality and being a minor

Don't be fucking weird, these are my thoughts and experiences

I despise the fact that the only way I know how to get attention is by being provocative and flirtatious. I don't feel like anyone is interested in talking to me unless I'm stroking their ego and getting them off

Aside from all of the shame that comes with it, being hypersexual and under 18 might be one of the hardest things I've had to come to terms with so far. I can't even jokingly flirt with people or offer to "pretend to date each other" because I know for a fact that I would take it too far and either make someone uncomfortable or put myself in danger and it makes me feel awful

Back to the shame thing, I cannot fucking express how absolutely awful I feel for how many people I have interacted with in an NSFW way online. I shouldn't, I always make sure they know I'm a minor before anyone talks to me. I just can't help but feel like I've ruined lives, I've made monsters out of innocent people, if they feel half as guilty as I do (and they should) they probably will never forgive themselves.

I'll never forgive myself either. For wanting to do this, for acting on it in the past, for not being responsible and hurting myself. There is irreparable damage from this and I did it all to myself like a fucking idiot and I hate to know that if I got the chance I would do it all again.

[helloworld232]

I wanna ⭐ve to d3@th

[beebboopbop]

I hate when people are like standoffish but not straight forward like do you hate me or not?!

[cryptic-diary]

I hope. I hope that when it is my turn, I will be able to see stars as clear as the darkening edge of my vision. I hope that when the cold seeps into my clothes and into my bones, that it will comfort me as much as it cured the burns of the past before. I hope that when I take my final breath, it is of relief.

[su1c1d3wh0r3z]

[lunarofthevalley]

this is what my first month on sertraline feels like:

[insignificantfailure]

I wonder if people notice. If doctors, restaurant servers, pharmacists, uber drivers, delivery guys, receptionists, and other strangers I interact with notice how awkward I am. How childish, how shy, how scared, how anxious, like I'm barely a human being. When doctors see my age, and then they proceed to have a conversation with me for like 30 minutes, do they see how something's wrong with me? How I'm on the verge of having a breakdown from simply having to exist in society? I must look so pathetic in their eyes. I must seem like a child in an adult's body. It feels like I'm cosplaying someone of my age, and it's embarrassing. I try to hard to act normal, but the raw, unfiltered side of me... it shows.

[nosfe-ratu]