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It’s time to get this blog back up and running.

I won my Camp NaNo July goal of 115 pages and 36k words!

And now, to shelf it this month...

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Project Rekindle - Draft 2

Camp NaNoWriMo July is here! I have been getting done what I can with edits and notes from the first draft to the second draft.

Project Rekindle (temporary name) is a New Adult Gay Romance novella about a young man trying to gain back the love of his ex who has been showing signs that a second chance at love is on his mind.

Although the first draft is already completed and uploaded, I have been working on editing the entire text. That includes developing minor characters, focusing on what worked and what did not, deleting scenes and adding a lot more to the plot. I’m very excited to work on the second draft this July!

I definitely surpassed the first draft’s goal at 26,390 words, but this second draft’s goal will for now be 25,000 words. I will change it if I feel that I’m catching up too fast.

I have high hopes for this draft! Good luck to all!

- Gray H.

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I am a(n):

⚪ Male

⚪ Female

🔘 Writer

Looking for

⚪ Boyfriend

⚪ Girlfriend

🔘 An incredibly specific word that I can't remember

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I... I have completely no idea what post was supposed to schedule when. There’s something saved in my Queue, but it won’t show me and I can’t remember what it was. Noon at some random day, something will post!

- Gray H.

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I’m not sponsored, I just really like Grammarly.

They talk about how coming to terms with how non-Black, cis and hetero backgrounds and identities have contributed to harm and injustice might feel uncomfortable at first, but a moment of thought and reflection is worthwhile.

They have links to anti-racism resources for white people (podcasts, books, etc). They also say to allow others to educate you. Besides, they’re taking time out just to share information that you need to learn.

The article goes more into the use of gender neutral pronouns such as plural and singular “They,” referring to groups or individuals. They also mention how to intervene when someone says something potentially racist. Silence is not a neutral position for allies.

Feel free to give it a read!

- Gray H.

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Shelving the First Draft.

I discovered why shelving the first draft of your project for a month is necessary.

In April 2020, during a Camp NaNoWriMo event, I worked on my novella known as Project Rekindle. As the month drew to a close, I had completed the first draft and immediately thought I was ready to tackle it with edits. However, burnout had prevented me from performing anything more. The only logical thing I could do was to place my novella on the shelf- in a literal sense. According to other authors' experiences, it was promised that returning to your novel after a month was going to allow you to read the text with fresh eyes, to see what does and does not work.

The first few days of leaving my project alone had made me feel uneasy. All I wanted to do was fix mistakes and go through with edits in each chapter. Instead of doing so, I switched my focus to edit a different project titled Your Starlit Ceiling, which was an abandoned fanfiction of three or four years. Both projects had a comparable genre and plot: they were a second-chance gay romance.

Throughout May, I had gained new ideas and scenes to add in Project Rekindle. What comments I received for Your Starlit Ceiling helped me to know what people liked (although, it was a fanfiction; I received nothing negative as of yet). Those positive comments allowed me to think of how I could reuse or alternate certain scenes to include them in my main novella.

Another thing I did was read a romance story. This one was a contemporary lesbian romance titled Love's Tender Warriors by Radclyffe. This novella helped me to write a couple of scenes with passion in Your Starlit Ceiling, as well as it allowed me to know what I truly am capable of with my writing style. I learned how sometimes, the physical sensations are a lot more important than emotional sensations. A warm hand on one's back could soothe the anxiety they would feel, or a breath caught in their chest with a racing heart could describe the kiss better than "they pressed their lips together."

Although I discovered a lot during my break, I am still learning and coming up with more ideas for my main project (if not, then for my future stories). For Project Rekindle, the first chapter will be different, there will be more scenes, and there will be changes throughout the entire draft while sticking true to the original plot and idea. Taking a break for a long month may seem intimidating at first, but giving yourself time to focus on other projects or reading similar books could help you gain more ideas until you are ready to switch back to the main project.

To wrap up :: Shelf your project for a month. Shift your focus on either taking a break or working on a different project (but do know your limits; take a break when you need to). Read; focus on character development, think of why the characters feel and act the way they do and pay attention to the style of the writing. And especially ask questions! Does the author define emotions more than a physical feeling in a certain scene? Why do you think they did that?

As always, happy writing!

- Gray H.

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hello! as someone with vasovagal syncope and a history of fainting at protests, here are some precautions i take before taking to the streets:

drink a bottle of gatorade (or any other electrolyte-rich drink) BEFORE going out as well as bringing some to drink while at the protest.

wear light clothes so you don’t get too hot, even if it means standing out a little if everyone else is wearing black.

eat lots of high-fiber food beforehand AND bring snacks (such as protein bars, trail mix, candy, etc.)

take breaks from shouting/chanting for a few minutes at a time! this is possibly the most important one for me, as someone with asthma. it’s so imperative to make sure you always have enough oxygen.

have your phone on you IF YOU CAN so that you can call/text someone for help if you need to be taken home or to the hospital.

go with friends, and tell them what to do if you pass out (shout for help, cushion your head, hold jackets or bags above you to provide shade, get a water bottle ready for when you wake up, and anything else that you or your doctor knows will help).

stand close enough to other people so that if you do fall, you’ll fall against someone rather than on the ground. this will decrease the chances of hitting your head (note: this may not be possible due to the pandemic. if you can’t stand near others, make sure not to stand on ledges or benches that would worsen the fall).

routinely shift positions to keep your blood flowing and make sure you’re not locking your legs! something that helps me remember to do this is wearing uncomfortable shoes, which isn’t very fun but it forces me to step from foot to foot and roll my ankles a lot. 

if you start to feel faint, SIT DOWN. even if it means leaving the action for a few minutes. find somewhere shady to sit, drink some water or gatorade, eat something, and then rest for as long as you need. 

if you stand up and still feel faint, LEAVE. have someone drive you rather than taking public transportation, and if you don’t think you can walk to a car, have someone call an ambulance. don’t worry about drawing attention to yourself/being embarrassed (something that has prevented me from taking the necessary steps in the past). your safety is more important.

please share this if you can! also, please rb with anything you may have to add. stay safe!!!!!!!!!

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I’m aware this is a plant blog, but as a person, a black women, I have to use whatever platform I have to spread awareness. Everyone has a part to play and if you are doing nothing you are part of the problem.

🌿Silence is betrayal

🌿Silence is violence

🌿Silence is complicity

Black Lives Matter

credit goes to @sfbucketlist on instagram for these 40 ways you can help right now

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Educate yourself

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A note I made on Wattpad.

Hello, everyone! I have a few things I wanted to say. Please support the black community and the movement to end police brutality and racism. Do your research and open your eyes to how under-noticed they have been, be it authors, writers, or developers of any content, or perhaps everyday people. Wage gaps, under-payments, and unfair treatments silently exist. There is discrimination, and it needs to end. Please support the transgender community as well, especially the youth. Not all women have periods, and some people who might not identify women can have periods as well. No matter if you do or not, your identity is very valid (I'm with you here, as I identify as agender)! Have a nice day, and stay safe! - Gray H.

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I've been rethinking the Booktube part of my channel. Sharing books and reads, I feel are not beneficial to me- mental health wise, that is. Feeling the pressure to keep up to date with books, coming out with reading vlogs and reviews every week, turning down tags because I can't remember the reading or haven't read enough, and creating a TBR and Wrap Up videos require actually reading.

As someone who is a lot more of a writer, I have noticed how much reading with a "deadline" has been taking up my time. It has been affecting my mental well-being in a negative way, although reading HAS been positively affecting my creativity. I need to take my time with reading, but the time I want to give myself would be way too slow for Booktube videos. There is a part of myself that needs free time.

I haven't made a final choice just yet. It is possible for me to do book reviews, and maybe reading vlogs on the months I would take a break from writing. Those are possibilities. The community has been wonderful to each other as far as I have seen, but I may need to step away and focus on Authortube as well as my mental health. I will always keep reading and supporting other channels.

With that said, my mental health is linked to a specific disorder that I wish I can explain. It would make sense. Sadly, I am afraid of confusing my subscribers and followers and losing support. This disorder is not scary or harmful at all, but the stigma has recently resurfaced and thus been affecting my self-esteem and trust. Should I share it, or wait?

Thank you for reading ❤️

- Gray H.

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i have ask after ask in my inbox from people wondering what else they can do if they can’t go out and protest and they can’t afford to donate from their own funds. please keep talking about this on social media and off of it! talk to your family and talk to your friends! don’t let this issue die off from word of mouth. sign all the petitions that you can get your hands on! it takes two minutes of your day. this post is a link of a document full of petitions. and if you really are stuck about wanting to make monetary change, check out this post. it’s about an hour or so long video with a ton of ads throughout it and the money the ads bring in is split between numerous bail funds and other pressing issues right now. leave the video open in a different tab. once it’s over you’ll have to play at least three different videos of any length between playing it again so it’s not counted as spam views, and then you can go back. please don’t feel like you aren’t doing enough when you are doing all that you can with what you have.

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books to educate yourself about black history and struggle in America

disclaimer: I’m white. I’m white as snow. My ancestors came to America from Scotland before the war for Independence. My other ancestors came from Germany. I’m THAT white. So if there’s any books that I should take off the list or add, please let me know!! 

- Turning 15 on the Road to Freedom: My Story of the Selma Voting Rights March by Lynda Blackmon Lowery

- The Autobiography of Malcolm X

- For White Folks Who Teach in the Hood… and the Rest of Y'all Too: Reality Pedagogy and Urban Education by Christopher Emdin

- We Want to Do More Than Survive: Abolitionist Teaching and the Pursuit of Educational Freedom by Bettina L. Love

-  How to Be an Antiracist by Ibram X. Kendi

-  Stamped: Racism, Antiracism, and You by Jason Reynolds, Ibram X. Kendi

-  Pushout: The Criminalization of Black Girls in Schools by Monique W. Morris

- The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness by Michelle Alexander

- Free Cyntoia: My Search for Redemption in the American Prison System by Cyntoia Brown-Long, Bethany Mauger

- Loving vs. Virginia: A Documentary Novel of the Landmark Civil Rights Case by Patricia Hruby Powell

- At the Dark End of the Street: Black Women, Rape, and Resistance–A New History of the Civil Rights Movement from Rosa Parks to the Rise of Black Power by Danielle L. McGuire

- The Water Dancer by Ta-Nehisi Coates

- The Underground Railroad by Colson Whitehead

cool so now you have resources to learn from! so stop asking black people to rec you books when you could, I don’t know…google it?? :) stop asking ppl like @blackgrad to educate you when you can do it yourself :))) hi it’s me your friendly education major I’ll teach you as best as I can!!!

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Since I still have a huge following on here I wanna say some shit

Donate. Protest. Sign petitions. Do anything you can, people are tired of fighting for something we expected to get while living in a “free country”. People are dying because of the color of their skin and the government isn’t doing shit. I’ve attached some places to donate, how to safely protest, and a video to watch if you stuck home because of the virus and have no money to donate. Do not be silent. Especially if you have the privilege to speak out. You’re single black tile with a hashtag in the wrong spot isn’t doing shit. NO PEACE NO JUSTICE.

TEXT “FLOYD” TO 55156 TO DEMAND JUSTICE. 

BLM video: https://youtu.be/bCgLa25fDHM

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I found great thread on Twitter.

BOOKS FOR CHILDREN ABOUT RACISM

Educate yourself and others guys!!!

Reblog here and go find it on Twitter if you'd like!

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I’ve written a fully sourced post on Medium which should help you to debunk the most common bad faith arguments against Black Lives Matter and the current protests, using data and citations. It also includes an anti-racist reading list and donation links.

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Dos and Don'ts-stay educated

Via -@wastefreemarie on instagram

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A post shared by Marie (@wastefreemarie) on Jun 2, 2020 at 9:04am PDT