I decided to create a masterpost that would help you with what you are struggling with. Hopefully any of the links below will help you!
Reminder; You’re going to be okay. What you are going through will pass, just remember to breathe.
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Distractions;
Here are some distractions to help keep your mind occupied so you aren’t too focused on your thoughts.
-Draw something
-This website translates the time into colours.
-Create your own galaxy.
-Play flowing.
-Make a 3D line travel where ever you like.
-Listen to music.
-Calm.
-Ocean mood, do nothing for two minutes.
Sleep issues;
- 8 hour sleep music.
-Rainy mood.
-Meditation.
-Coping with nightmares.
-How to cope with nightmares, 11 steps.
-Calm
-Foods that can affect your sleeping, both positive and negatively.
Uncomfortable with silence;
-Rainy mood.
-10 hours of rain and thunder.
-3 hours of rain and thunder.
-Human heartbeat.
-Rainforest.
-Sound of rain on a tin roof.
-Autumn wind.
-Rain on a tent
-Traffic in the rain.
-Soft traffic.
-Fan.
-Train.
-Simply noise.
-My noise.
-Rainy cafe.
Anxiety;
-How to stop worrying.
-Tips to manage anxiety and stress.
-The 10 best ever anxiety management techniques.
-Self-help strategies for anxiety.
-Helping a friend with anxiety.
-All about worrying.
-8 myths about anxiety.
Sad, angry and depressed/depression;
-“I’m always sad”
-Feeling sad.
-Going through trauma.
-“I’m always angry”.
-Anger management.
-All about anger.
-National helplines and websites.
-Self-help strategies for depression.
-Dealing with depression at work.
-Dealing with depression at school.
Isolation and loneliness;
-Pets and mental health.
-All about loneliness.
-“I feel so alone”
-10 more ideas to help with loneliness.
-How to deal with loneliness.
Self-harm;
-Alternatives to self-harm and distraction techniques.
-146 things to do besides self-harm.
-More alternatives to self-harm.
-Self-harm alternatives.
-How to take care of self-harm wounds/injuries.
-Getting rid of scars.
Addiction;
-How to help a friend with a drug addiction.
-What is addiction?
-All about alcohol and addiction.
-The facts about drug addiction.
Eating disorders;
-Helping a friend with an eating disorder.
-Eating disorder treatments.
-Support services for eating disorders.
-Self-help tips with eating disorders.
-Eating disorder recovery.
-Recovering from an eating disorder.
-100+ reasons to recover.
-Understanding and managing eating disorders.
Dealing with self-hatred;
-3 ways to ease self-loathing.
-How to turn self-hatred into self-compassion.
-Self-hatred resources.
-10 step plan to deal with self-hate.
Suicidal;
-International suicide hotlines (1) (2)
-Preventing suicide.
-Reasons to stay alive.
-Dealing with suicidal thoughts and feelings.
-Coping with suicidal ideation.
Schizophrenia;
-All about schizophrenia.
-Helping a person with schizophrenia.
-Understanding and dealing with schizophrenia.
-Delusions and hallucinations.
OCD;
-Managing your OCD at home.
-Overcoming OCD.
-How to cope with OCD.
-Strategies for dealing with the anxious moments.
Borderline personality disorder;
-Helping someone with BPD.
-All about personality disorders.
-Treatment for BPD.
Abuse;
-Healthy relationships VS abusive relationships.
-Emotional abuse
-Overcoming sexual abuse.
-Hotlines services.
-5 ways to escape an abusive relationship.
-Domestic violence support.
-Signs of an abusive relationship.
-What do to if you’re in an abusive relationship.
-Surviving abuse.
-What you can do if you’re sexual harassed.
-Sexual assault support.
-What to do if you’ve been sexually assaulted or abused.
Bullying;
-How to stand up against bullying.
-How to protect yourself when it comes to cyber bullying.
-How to help stop people bullying you.
Loss and grief;
-How to cope with a suicide of a loved one.
-Grieving for a stranger.
-Common reactions to death.
-Working through grief.
(Other loss and grief)
-Moving away from friends and family.
-Coping with a breakup.
Getting help;
-Seeking help early.
-All about psychological treatments.
-Types of help.
-All about age and confidentiality.
Things you need to remember;
- Don’t stress about being fixed because you’re not broken.
-Remember to remind yourself of your accomplishments. Tell yourself that you’re proud of yourself, even if you’re not.
- This is temporary. You won’t always feel like this.
-You are not alone.
-You are enough.
-You are important.
-You are worth it.
-You are strong.
-You are not a failure,
-Good people exist.
-Reaching out shows strength.
-Breathe.
-Don’t listen to the thoughts that are not helping you.
-Give yourself credit.
-Don’t be ashamed of your emotions, for the good or bad ones.
-Treat yourself the same way as you would treat a good friend.
-Focus on the things you can change.
-Let go of toxic people.
-You don’t need to hide, you’re allowed to feel the way you do.
-Try not to beat yourself up.
-Something is always happening, you don’t want to miss out on what’s going to happen next.
-You are not a bother.
-Your existence is more than your appearance.
-You are smart.
-You are loved.
-You are wanted.
-You are needed.
-Better days are coming.
-Just because your past is dark, doesn’t mean your future isn’t bright.
-You have more potential than you think.
- Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.
Please remember to look after yourself and know that you are more than worth it and you deserve to be happy. Keep smiling butterflies x
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Closed Closet (Spinel X Reader)
So I watched the Steven Universe Movie and I am FAMISHED. I knew right away I had to make a fanfic of Spinel, so here ya go! (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
I did rush this quite a bit, and in no way am I expecting this to relieve your thirst for Spinel, but I do intend on revising and updating this post once I have the time. I have a bad habit of prioritizing less important things over my actual school work…whoops. This is kinda spicy, so I hope this satisfies your needs ≧◡≦
Word count: 4,019
Warnings: Foul Language
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You sat on the floor comfortably as you leaned back onto your hands. Your nails dug into the carpet on the floor gently as your eyes darted from person to person in the room. Steven had planned a little hangout at Lars’ house and invited multiple people. You had wondered for a moment why he hadn’t just planned a hangout at the temple, but then you had realized that there was an accident that had recently taken place at the crystal gem’s home.
Peridot was left at the house unsupervised by any of the gems while she was baking a cake for Pumpkin’s birthday. Once Steven returned home after getting donuts from the Big Donut, he had found the house partially burnt. You nearly knocked yourself out from laughing so hard when Pearl told you about the incident. You couldn’t believe that they would leave her all alone like that!
So while Bismuth and a couple other gems repaired the house, Steven decided it would be nice to have a small party with his close friends, which honestly you didn’t mind, because you loved hanging out with Beach City’s weirdest people.
Your eyes scanned everyone’s faces in the room; Lars and Sadie, Connie and Steven, Lapis and Peridot, Pearl and Amethyst, and Garnet with Spinel. Everyone was chatting, some were on the floor like yourself, others were dancing to quiet music, and others were eating snacks while telling jokes. It was nice and calming, that was until your eyes met Spinel’s.
The feeling of your heart thrumming at the sight of her eyes almost made you feel dizzy. It was really odd, though, because your heart always did that whenever you were near Spinel. She was always very comfortable with you, she’d call you cute little pet names (which you assumed to be friendly), and she’d always go the extra mile just to make you smile. Whenever she talked about something that really intrigued her or made her excited, her little accent would be audible to your ears and you couldn’t help the warm sensation that spread across your face.
You had definitely grown very fond of the gem, regardless of what others think of her. She did have that pissed off looking rest face, which does make her look quite intimidating, but you honestly thought it was cute. You really enjoyed her company, even if she did struggle with her own issues.
But you couldn’t help the frown that formed on your lips at the thought of Spinel. Whenever you looked at her you felt disappointed. At the beginning of your friendship, she had opened up to you about her feelings and problems. Whenever she looked agitated or felt down, you were always there to listen and comfort her. If anything, your similar feelings were the reason why you had grown so close. But then she just stopped. She stopped talking to you about her feelings.
Every time you saw her she looked more angry and tense, and if you asked her about how she was doing she’d just brush your question off her shoulder and answer with: “I’m fine dollface, ya don’t gotta ask every 2 minutes.”
You gave her space from that point on. But the more space you gave her, the more she closed off and the less your conversations lasted. You knew she was lying to you when she said she was fine. There have been times when you saw her, and her eyes were swollen red and puffy as if she’s been crying. Words cannot describe the amount of guilt and pain you felt, because you wanted to help her so badly, but she wouldn’t let you. She refuses to share anything about her past or feelings with you, and you didn’t understand why. What were you doing wrong?
Letting out a sigh, you stood up from your comfortable spot on the floor and made your way over to Spinel and Garnet who sat on Lars’ bed. Their conversation had ceased when they saw you approach them, and Garnet waved at you to sit down next to them.
“Hello y/n.” Garnet greeted with a soft smile. You returned the smile as you made yourself comfortable on the bed, “Hey Garnet-” You turned over to Spinel and gave her wide grin, ignoring the small wave of nervousness that splashed onto you, “hey Spinel.” The pink gem gave you a soft smirk, her eyes instantly growing soft at the sight of you. She greeted you with a small wave of her hand before she placed it behind her head.
You turned to look at Garnet with a relaxed glint in your eyes and you let out a soft sigh, “Man, this is exactly what I needed. We should definitely do this more often.” Garnet snorted, lifting a hand to her lips as she shook her head jokingly, “You see us almost everyday y/n.” You rolled your eyes playfully at her comment as you let yourself fall onto the bed, the soft cushion of Lars’ bed against your back was truly bliss.
“It’s still fun. All of us being in one place and just chatting amongst each other is one of the best things in life. Plus, Spinel doesn’t come on earth often. So it’s nice to see her.” You glanced over at Spinel with a, rather confident, wink. You watched as her cheeks turned light pink at your gesture, and she looked away from your face with a soft chuckle, “Thanks sugar, it’s nice to see ya too.” She winked back, and you could have sworn you felt your heart skip a beat. Man, this gem really has you feeling all sorts of ways.
The sudden voices of Steven and Lars caught everyone’s attention, making their eyes turn to the duo that stood in the middle of the room. After they had everyone’s eyes set on their figures, Lars began to speak, “So Steven and I had planned a game for us all to play. It’s called 7 Minutes in Heaven. Basically-” He stopped mid-sentence as his face scrunched up as if he was trying to remember what he was going to say next.
“hold up.” He whipped out his phone from his pocket and began to type furiously on his phone. Steven sighed with a roll of his eyes, “Basically what the game is about-”
“OKAY,” Lars interrupted, a big smile formed on his lips as he stared at the screen of his phone, “So basically the game is about having two people enter a small space, like a closet,” Lars turned behind him and pointed at a closet door, “and have them spend 7 minutes inside. You can do anything inside, like chat or play games. I’ve left a small flameless candle inside so you can see, and a few board games if you want to play.”
Steven than pulled a small top hat from behind his back and shook it, “Inside this hat is all of your names. We will pull out two random names, and whoever gets called goes inside the closet for 7 minutes. This game is all about privacy, so when you go inside the rest of us will turn up the music and we’ll wait until it is time for you to come out. And remember,” Steven smiled at everyone in the room happily, “have fun and respect the other person’s space. Don’t proceed with any activities if the other party doesn’t consent to it. Do we understand?” Everyone in the room nodded their heads in agreement.
“Great! Now we will draw the names.” Steven lifted the hat and shook it before he reached in to grab a piece of paper. Lars then reached in and grabbed another piece of paper and they both unwrapped the small pieces of paper as their eyes scanned the written names. Your heart began to beat slightly faster than usual. You wouldn’t ever admit it to yourself, but you wanted to go inside with Spinel. It had been so long since you’ve had a genuine conversation with her. You wanted to connect with her so badly. She was growing to become your stranger, and you wanted anything but that. You hoped this would be a perfect opportunity to speak to her.
“Y/n.“ Lars read out loudly.
Oh goodness.
“Spinel.” Steven said, looking up from the paper in between his fingers and smiled, “Alright you two, go on ahead inside.”
Wait, did that really just happen?
You didn’t realize the smile on your face. You couldn’t even feel that you had subconsciously smiled at the fact that you’d be staying in a closet alone with Spinel. You could finally speak to her. What was the likelihood of Steven and Lars actually drawing both of your names like that? What an odd coincidence.
You just hoped this would go smoothly.
Getting up from your comfortable spot on the bed, you made your way over to the closet with Spinel walking straight behind you. You stepped inside the middle-sized closet with Spinel as you heard the volume on the boombox increase. Steven peered inside the closet and smiled at the both of you, “Have fun, you guys. See you in 7 minutes!” And with that, he closed the closet door shut.
Regardless of the blasting music behind the closed doors of the closet, it was pretty quiet. Too quiet. You could hear your blood pump in your ears.
“Since we’re gon’ be here for 7 minutes, might as well get comfy.” Spinel said casually, sitting down on the floor with her legs crossed. You stood there dumbfounded for a second as you gather your thoughts before sitting down across from her. You smiled sheepishly at her, and she smirked, “What'dya wanna do doll?” She turned to a small pile of board games and reached for the one on the top, “Wanna play Monopoly?” She asked, her gaze turning to look at your face and waited for your answer.
You nodded with a small smile, “Yeah, I love Monopoly. Have you played before?” Spinel shook her head softly, her pink hair following her movements as she opened the box and opened the board to set on the floor, “Nah, but you can teach me as we play. How does that sound?” You hummed in agreement with her proposal. You watched as she set down all of the game cash and the figurines on the board, “You can pick a character you want to play as.” You told her.
She nodded and picked up a game piece, “Heh, this one’s cute.” You let a small giggle leave past your lips as you pick up another, “Alright, I’ll play as this one.” You and Spinel began to play for a few minutes, as you explained to her about the basics of Monopoly and how you have to pass go to collect 200 dollars. You have the rules of the game burned in the back of your brain since you’d always play it with your childhood friends when you were small.
Just as it became your turn, you suddenly stopped and looked up from the board and up to Spinel. She returned your gaze and rose a brow curiously at you. Were you going to speak to her? Were you going to follow through with your feelings? “Spinel,” You spoke out her name, and she cocked her head a little to the right, “Something the matter dollface?” Her voice held curiosity and slight concern, but you suddenly felt a wave of irritation and frustration ram into you. And it rams into you hard.
You let out an airless sigh, your fingers letting go of the figurine that you held in your hands, shaking your head in disbelief. Was she being serious right now? Did she seriously just ask what was the matter, when you’ve been spending the last couple months trying to ask her that question?
“You’re really going to ask that right now, Spinel?” You say with a roll of your eyes, feeling every bit of annoyance and hurt that had built inside slowly start to spill out of you.
“You have been emotionally distant from me and from everyone you know. For months I’ve been trying to help you. But every time I try you push me further and further away! And now you’re going to ask me what’s the fucking matter!?” You gasped at your sudden outburst and quickly placed your fingers on your lips. You hadn’t meant to blow up, it just…happened.
Spinel sat wide-eyed at your words, but you watched as her face grew dark and sinister. You could feel your heart plummet down into your stomach when you watched her expression change drastically within split seconds, and the low growl that erupted in her throat made you want to hide and never come out. You knew damn well you had angered her, and there’s no way to go back.
The easygoing smirk she had plastered onto her face was a mere mask, and now her true emotions are slipping past her grasp and all you can manage to do is meet her angry glare.
“I don’t gotta tell you shit, toots.” She sneered out through her bared teeth, making you flinch at how aggressive she became. You’ve never heard her growl so deeply before, and it honestly terrified you. You wondered why she hadn’t acted so cold to you before…
Her words really hit it home when you started to feel your heart ache in pain, it was pretty damn clear that she wanted nothing to do with you. And god damn it, it hurt. Because no matter what you did or what you said, you knew she was going to shove you away. Fighting fire with fire wasn’t a wise decision, but you needed her to hear everything.
“Do you not understand the fact that I’m worried!? What do you take me for? An idiot?? I know you’re lying when you say you’re FINE Spinel.” Your voice grew louder and louder with every word, and you could feel your throat swell and ache at how much you yelled. Your eyes stung as you felt hot, burning tears well up in your eyes, and you tried to keep them from escaping past your lids.
Your hands balled into fists as you continued, “Hell, even the Diamonds know you’re hiding something! They worry for you Spinel! Everyone does! I worry about y-you!” Your voice began to crack as for you could no longer look at Spinel while you were saying these things. It was too much for you. All you wanted was for her to be happy, and you can’t even make that happen.
You could see your knuckles turn white from how tightly you were holding your fists. You didn’t care if anyone outside the closet could hear you, it wasn’t even on your mind. You just needed to get this off your chest, even if Spinel wasn’t willing to listen.
“We used to be so close…but then you started pushing me away!”
There was silence for a short while. But the sudden sound of the Monopoly board game flying towards the wall made you squeal in surprise. Spinel was closer to you now, and in the corner of your eye you could see the scattered pieces of the Monopoly game all over the floor, but that wasn’t your main focus. Your eyes met with Spinel’s, and you could see anger, but there was another emotion, or multiple, that were added to the mix that you couldn’t quite identify. You were so overwhelmed with your own emotions that you couldn’t even comprehend the situation entirely.
“Lemme tell ya a little somethin’ sweetcheeks,” She then grabbed a fist full of your shirt and lifted you up so that you were mere inches from her face, you were so close to her that you could feel her hot breath hit your face. A long, cold shiver ran up your spine at the sensation, and it only made your heart race faster than it already was. “I got my reasons for what I do what I do. My feelings ain’t got nothin’ to do with you. So why don'tcha just mind your own damn business?”
You didn’t want to think that her voice could get any deeper, but you were most definitely wrong. The lump in your throat overwhelmed you, along with the heating of your skin, and all you could do was whimper in response to her words. Spinel’s grip only grew tighter on your shirt as she pulled you even closer, “Why the hell do ya want me around anyway!? Just so you can leave me all alone like she did? So you can use me up and toss me away when you get bored of me!?” You felt confusion and pain swirl within your heart and soul. What was she talking about?
You didn’t understand what she was saying. She was abondoned? By who? Why?
“N-no!” You stammered out, big, hot tears rolled down your cheeks as you turned away from her hateful gaze and to the wall. You hated this. You hated how she made you feel. You hated how she made you hurt for her when she doesn’t even care.
“I want you around b-because you’re my friend Spinel-” She interrupted you with a dark chuckle, her grip on your shirt forced you to look into her eyes, “Ya don’t gotta lie to me babycakes,” She pressed her forehead against yours as she continued to snarl out her hurtful words, “I know you’re only pretending to care bout’ me. When the fuck are ya finally gon’ admit that you don’t want me, huh!?”
“But I do want you!”
It took you only a few seconds to realize what you had just said, and the true meaning behind your words. Silence. You and Spinel both fell completely quiet, and the words you yelled out echoed within the walls of your head. Your face grew hot, embarrassment had been added to the mix of emotions you were experiencing. Did you just…
Spinel’s glare disappeared, and a look of shock had replaced it. Her mouth was held agape, and her eyes were slightly wide. You could see her cheeks flush a deep red. She opened her mouth to say something, but quickly closed it. You left her completely speechless. Your heart threatened to leap out of your chest when you saw her eyes move from your eyes down to your lips.
“Damn you…” Spinel growled before she roughly shoved her lips against yours in a heated kiss. You squeaked in surprise, a new wave of emotions splashed onto you and you closed your eyes shut, focusing on her touch and warmth. Her mouth moved against yours, and your hands instinctively moved to her shoulders. You could feel her hands move to your cheeks as she softly held your face, pulling you closer to her.
Her kisses became more and more heated. You could feel every single emotion that she had kept to herself. Every single kiss held frustration, anger, loneliness, and sadness, and she was giving it all to you. Her lips were so soft against yours. You loved it. You loved her.
Your soul nearly jumped out of your body when you felt her tongue glide against your bottom lip. You accepted her request and let her explore every single spot she desired. You tilted your head to the side to deepen the rough, needy kiss.
“Mmph~” You couldn’t help the soft moan that had escaped your throat when you felt her tongue coax your own to play. She tasted so sweet.
You felt her pull away, and to your surprise, you saw tears form in her stunning eyes as her lip quivered.
“God, I need you…” She murmured, pressing kisses on your neck as she placed her hands on your hips. You could feel her tongue glide on your warm skin and you bit your lip, trying so hard to keep your embarrassing noises to yourself.
“I want you…” She softly bit onto your skin, earning herself another moan. You felt her smile against your skin, then she pressed kisses all along your collarbone and up your neck, then gliding her lips along your jaw.
“I love you…” She pressed her lips against yours into another kiss, this time, it’s more loving and soft. She let out a soft whimper as she brought you closer to her, her lips moving in sync with your own. You never knew just how much you wanted Spinel until now, and you could honestly say that you were the happiest person in the world.
She let out a groan when you bit onto her lower lip, this time exploring her. Her hands were shaky as they roamed all over your body. Her hand went under your shirt and felt every mile of skin. Your hands traveled up to her hair and you softly gripped onto her pink locks and smiled at how surprisingly soft they were. Her hands went up to your belly and to your chest, feeling you, wanting you.
You pulled away and panted heavily, your forehead flushed against hers. Spinel’s face was a deep, beet red color, much like yours, and you just smiled when you saw how the pupils of her eyes shaped into little hearts as she stared at you with adoration and love. You stroked her wet cheeks softly as you pressed a kiss on her nose.
“Wow…” She mumbled, her thumb stroked the skin on your chest gracefully, “You really are somethin’ toots.” You smiled happily at her, and nuzzled your face in the crook of her neck, “After this party, you’re telling me everything that’s on your mind.”
There was a slight pause, so you moved your head to look at Spinel’s face. She looked devastated. Her eyes held so much sadness in them.
"…I’m so sorry I said all those things to ya…” You immediately met her eyes, and saw guilt and regret swirl within her orbs, “All those things I said to ya…I…” She shut her eyes and looked away from you. Purely ashamed for what she had said to you. You gently gripped onto her cheeks and quickly comforted her.
“Hey, hey Spinel, look at me,” Her glossy eyes met yours, your fingers were quick to wipe away any falling tears from her eyes, “I forgive you. Everything you said wasn’t true. You were hurt and in pain. And that’s why I need you to tell me what’s wrong. Or else you’ll hurt others.” You kissed her eyes softly, wrapping your arms around her as you nuzzled into her hair, “Okay? We’ll make it through this together.”
Spinel pulled away and gazed at you with a small, sad frown and nodded her head, “Sure thing doll.” You slowly stood up to your feet and helped Spinel up, hearing the music of the boombox go quiet and footsteps approaching the closet door, and the sudden light of the room blinded you once the doors had flew open.
“Times up! You guys can come out now.” You and Spinel slightly stumbled out of the closet, squinting your eyes as they adjusted to the new lighting. As you made your way over to the bed with Spinel, Amethyst looked over at the both of you and smirked, “Did you guys have fuunn?” Your face started to burn as you remembered you had fought and had an extremely heated make-out session with Spinel in just 7 minutes.
“BAHAHAHAHAH!!” Amethyst laughed hysterically as your red face had answered her question. You just looked away from her in complete embarrassment.
You turned to Spinel when you felt her fingers intertwine with yours, only to see a smug smirk implanted onto her lips, "Ya know…” One of Spinel’s hands laid on your thigh as she softly kneaded your skin, “You tasted pretty good. I wonder what other parts of you taste sweet~”
“Lars and Sadie! You guys are up next!”
You swear your heart was going to explode if the night continued.
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