hanguangjunnnnn

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Lan Jingyi: Please genie just one more wish-

Genie: No, I told you; the deal was three.

Lan Jingyi, clutching his three new ninja turtle action figures: Please genie!

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Wei Wuxian: Here you go, nice hot cup of tea.

Lan Qiren: It's cold.

Wei Wuxian: Nice cup of tea.

Lan Qiren: It's horrible!

Wei Wuxian: Cup of tea.

Lan Qiren: I'm not even sure it is tea.

We Wuxian: Cup.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Jiang Cheng: You shouldn't be using a straw.

Wei Wuxian: I know it's bad for the environment or whatever.

Jiang Cheng: No, it just a weird way to eat spaghetti.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Jin JiXuan: I really like her but I don't know what to do.

Lan WangJi: Have you tried flirting?

Jin JiXuan: Yes, I gave her 'the look'.

Lan WangJi: Show me.

Jin JiXuan: *bites his lip seductively*

Lan WangJi: Have you considered biting your bottom lip?

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Nie MingJue: You are so short.

Jin GuangYao: Put some inches in me then.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

*in the library*

Wei Wuxian: You are pretty and you are smart. You are also ignoring me. So, you are obviously my type.

Lan Wangji: *ignores him*

Wei Wuxian: *heart eyes* Perfect.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Wei Wuxian: I have something to tell you all. I like men.

Jiang Cheng: Actually, I like men too.

Madam Yu: Is there anyone in this household who even likes girls?

Jiang Yanli: I do.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Wei Wuxian: So, on a scale of one to ten, how mad are you at me?

Wen Qing: An Eight!

Wei Wuxian: Hm...I can do better than that.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Eternal -Lan Zhan ver.-

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (MDZS 魔道祖師) novel

Lan WangJi happy birthday

*art by zeldacw.  Do not use or re-post.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Wei Wuxian: So, you love my Shijie?

Jin Zixuan: Yes.

Wei Wuxian: Would you take a bullet for her?

Jin Zixuan: Yes.

Wei Wuxian: Great. Meet me in the back in 10 minutes.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Wen Qing, holding Wwx's medical report: Here are your test results.

Wei Wuxian: Haha. Did I pass?

Wen Qing: You will soon.

Wei Wuxian: Huh?

[hanguangjunnnnn]

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Wei Wuxian : Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so instead I told Lan Zhan to periodically send me texts saying, ‘We need to talk.’

Wei Wuxian : It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Someone on the phone : Hello, can I please speak to the man of the house?

Jin Zixuan, handing the phone over to Jiang YanLi: A-Li, they are asking for you.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Be merry and break the rules! 

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Lan WangJi, drunk: You remind me of rabbits.

Wei WuXian: How so?

Lan WangJi: I love rabbits and I love you.

Wei Wuxian: Oh my god.

[hanguangjunnnnn]

Jin Ling: In my life I have only ever said "I love you" to one person and every dog I ever met.