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Dear bitch. I have trouble making friends. What are you going to do about it?

-Jax’s submission to the suggestion box

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Caine: I have prepared something for just such an emergency.

Pomni: You’re prepared for a bunch of Abstracted players escaping the cellar?

Caine: That is correct!

Pomni: How do you plan for that?!?!

Caine: Lucky Guess?

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Pomni: Why is Jax gagged?

Zooble: He wouldn't stop talking.

Pomni: Even when he was unconscious?

Zooble: Especially when he was unconscious!

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Caine: You deserve a prize! Here, have a head that's always screaming!

Caine: *summons the Angel*

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Kinger: *violently swinging a metal pipe*

Pomni: Whoa, where'd that come from!?

Kinger: I punched an oil drum!

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Caine: You know, studies show that keeping a ladder in the house is more dangerous than a loaded gun.

Caine: That's why I own ten guns, in case some maniac tries to sneak in a ladder.

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Jax, to Pomni: Welcome to the Digital Circus, you're joining at a bit of a low point.

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Ragatha: He's very excitable, so don't say anything to surprise him.

Kinger: Pleased to meet you.

Pomni: Actually, we've met once before.

Kinger: WHAT!? *explodes*

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Kinger: Why does Ragatha look so worried?

Zooble: What are you talking about? She looks exactly like she always does.

Kinger: To you, perhaps. But I've finally learned how to read her emotions. Her lips are slightly pursed, and she's blinking at eight-second intervals as opposed to her normal ten.

Kinger: Oh my god, she's having a meltdown.

Zooble: "Meltdown" seems excessive.

Kinger: Yeah, it's a meltdown. Mark my words.

Kinger: Hey there, Ragatha! Everything okay?

Ragatha: No, I'm having a meltdown.

Zooble: Props, that was amazing.

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Gummigoo: You either buckle down and do your work, or you'll end up at McDonald's.

Chad: We're going to McDonald's if I don't do my work?

Gummigoo: No-

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Caine: What's your greatest strength?!

Kinger: My decisiveness!

Kinger:

Kinger: W-Wait, I changed my mind!

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Zooble: (slaps a “TEAM %$!#ED™” sign on the wall) So.

Zooble, to Pomni: Welcome to being %$!#ed™.

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Gangle: Do you think Pomni could really have a normal adventure?

Zooble: Short answer: No.

Zooble: Long answer: Nooooooooooooooooo...

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Ragatha: If you see anyone-

Jax, pulling out the shotgun: Murder them!

Ragatha: HIDE! If you see anyone, HIDE!

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Jax: You know, when you're right, you're right.

Pomni: No, we don't have time for-

Pomni:

Pomni: Yeah, I am right...

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Ragatha: Wait, hold on. This is no time to be hysterical.

Jax: It's the perfect time to be hysterical.

Kinger: Should we be HYSTERICAL?

Zooble: No!

Gangle: Yes!

Ragatha: Maybe, but not right now!

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Pomni: It's about time I contributed to the online discourse.

Pomni: Bricks are domesticated rocks.

Zooble: Stop.

Jax: Let her speak!