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Another one

(My AU’s Buzz Lippman hugs Buzzpipe)

Buzzpipe: Wh-What’s goin’ on?! What is this?!

My AU’s Buzz: Something your world’s cousin clearly never gave you; a hug.

Buzzpipe: *Cries*

(Source: Oddballs)

^ :'(

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(Josh "Schmitty" Schmitstinstein and the Intern named Josh are standing side by side, and Cookie Masterson is holding a buzzsaw)

Cookie: This studio ain't big enough for two Joshes!

(Cookie cuts the top of the intern Josh's head off with the buzzsaw)

Schmitty, thinking: Phew.

^ Just another day at the studio.

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BR Hostess: In your own words, uh, what is a hedgehog?

Dixie: You want me to make up new words or my words?

BR Hostess: In your own words-

Dixie: Ok. Shmoopandants, rookes prdoof, frush noosts, priopods

BR Hostess:…Cool

^ I mean, what did we expect?

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Guy: So… What would you do if you were in bed with me?

Buzz: Depends. Is your bed comfortable?

Guy: Yeah.

Buzz, not missing a beat: I’d sleep.

5:30 am, 6/29/2025

^

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(I hope crossovers are fine here-)

Buzz holding his newborn looking disappointed:nine months in my womb making me suffer

*he holds him up as he has the same expression as Steven (that’s not my neighbor)*

Buzz:AND HE LOOKS LIKE HIS STUPID DAD!

*nate is watching the twins(age 1 then) stare at the back door waiting for Mr calm*

Nate:your mom is inside you know-

(The source for the first one is c0ca_Mica on twitter and the other one I got from my sisters cat waiting for her at M Y D O O R to which hers is next to mine anyway here are the babs if you’re curious:>)

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Hey, i would normally post a drawing of this, but my computer is too broken to do that. So here i am brushing off the old Tumblr to pass another headcannon that's been plaguing me.

I personally believe that Sexy Owl behaves like a regular owl, a very smart one, but more like Tee K.O.'s Inugami than anything close to Mayonnaise.

If you didn't know, Cookie is canonically pretty good at training birds to do things for him (granted, the birds suck at doing the things properly, they're still birds at the end of the day), and he's also REALLY talented at imitating certain sounds orally.

So i headcannon that Cookie was Sexy Owl's handler during The Jackbox Party Pack. She was really well behaved, keeping her talons to herself, or perched on Cookie's Falconry glove. Cookie likely hooting at Sexy Owl to calm her down when the others got hectic, or when it's time feed her. And overall having a very smooth photography session for promotional images and the likes.

And all The Pack 8 hosts aren't even CLOSE to that level of talent with avians:

• Bubz keeps a clownfish in chlorinated fresh water, if they can't even do basic fish care correctly; i don't think they'd be able to deal with a bird of prey.

• L'averne would probably not be completely clueless, but likely has more experience with monsters than regular old avians, doubt she could properly help.

• The Wheel straight up doesn't know what birds are.

• Lord Tippet's method of dealing with rude fowl is throwing stuff at them.

• And The Narrator wouldn't be able to mentally suggest a feral animal to behave, because i'm pretty sure they don't have the brain power to perceive something like a conscience.

So i just imagine them all getting attacked by this territorial animal, none of them having a clue to get her to calm down. Talon scratches drawing blood and beak bites tugging at flesh. Anything they do just getting Sexy Owl more and more agitated and aggressive, likely having to physically pin her down for photos. And don't get me started when she gets hungry during shootings, you think any of them thought to bring FROZEN MICE for a photo shoot?

^ All mighty dieties of Jackbox, defeated by an angry owl.

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Sheriff: Water my horse, will you son?

Red Herring: Water your horse? I’m not a stable boy!

Sheriff: I don’t care about your mental condition, water my horse!

(Source: The Monkees)

^

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“Oh No!!! My ribcage split open, revealing a grotesque, vertical maw, slavering and bleeding, with uneven rows of jagged and splintered ribs for teeth!!! And prom is TOMORROW!!!”

-Felicia, probably

^

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“You do not scare me! Have you ever been divorced?!”-schmitty in a hunted house

(Source- Amanda from smosh during “is there an actual killer at universal studios Halloween nights”)

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"i gotta stop making friends at the gym" with Alpha as the blue text and Jester as the white text (texts below for reference :)

> Would u be privy to a climb Sunday

> Yes :)

> Would u wanna go grocery shopping w me after

> We could pretend to be an interrace gay couple

> On some fault in our stars shit

> What

^ Oh my gosh!

What if they hugged? And kissed? And maybe, held hands?

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YOOOOOOOOOO!!!

TMP FANS ARE EATING GOOD TONIGHT

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“I’m all-knowing, not all-paying-attention”

—The Wheel, probably

(Source: Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur)

^

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Good responses to getting stabbed with a sword:

Dixie: Rude

Dot: That’s fair

Lord Tippet: Not again

Cookie: Are you gonna want this back, or can I keep it?

Todd: Oh no, I’m allergic

Captain Chuck: It sword of seems you’ve got a problem with me

Felicia: *Laughter*

Toby and/or Lena: Sure it’s the thought that counts, and I appreciate the sentiment, but does this gift come with a receipt?

Master Mentalist: You wound me. Literally. You just actually wounded me. That thing is really sharp! So you- don’t look at me like that, they can’t all be winners

Bob: Wouldn’t it have been hilarious if I just flew back like balloons do when you pop ‘em? Can you imagine? God just- do it again. Pretend the first time didn’t happen. Come on, please

[Redacted]: *grabs the sword by the blade, pulls it out, and hands it back to them* You dropped this

Jerri: That’s unfortunate

Schmitty: It could be worse

M Bubz: This isn’t really how I pictured my day going when I woke up this morning, but who am I to complain?

(Source: Tumblr)

^

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[REDACTED]: God, give me patience.

Schmitty: I think you mean 'give me strength'.

[REDACTED]: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

^ Patience is a virtue, after all!

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Mayonnaise: "Can you not do impulsive crap for two seconds, and listen to me?!"

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“No where in Humpty Dumpty does it say anything about him being an egg. Think of it, go over it in your head. Doesn’t say anything about it, just a guy who fell. A human being, extensively, one would imagine. Yeah, it’s f*cking horrifying! It’s just the macabre tale of a kingdom of horses attempting to reassemble a dead man. Mother Goose, whoever you are, the f*ck?”

-Nate Shapiro on Truth Talk 23/7, probably

(Source: Will Wood)

^ Nate, you've been hanging around [REDACTED] too much.

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Things you must try on an elevator

[Redacted]: Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off

Glargan: Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you admiral

Mayonnaise: Meow occasionally

Nate: Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror, “You’re one of them!” and back away slowly

M.O.T.H.E.R.: Say DING at each floor

Greg: Make explosion noises when someone presses a button

Dot: Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce that this is your personal space

M. Bubz: When there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you

Cookie: Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up then scream, “That’s mine!”

Guy: Call out a group hug, then enforce it

^