itstimeforanewblog

[itstimeforanewblog]

God wants you to serve in the best way possible. Stop believing that this is a two tiered world in which only the University educated are helped, placed, moved upward. We are all playing a role, a very important role.

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Let nothing stand between you and serving the greater good. There is a place out there for you and the whole universe is working to get you there. However there is also a place out there where stuck people can go who are committed to staying stuck, so beware. 

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It was clear to me last night that I needed to create instead of be caged. How do I do that? Where do I begin? It’s one thing at a time. Think of Derek and Hannah. 

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I am adopting a plant based diet. My theory though is that raw-food in our diet actually causes all illness. So I am going to cook, ferment, etc everything before I eat it. 

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Today I am not choosing to believe anything, I am simply doing. I am serving. I know how to do this because I know how to not serve, not be placed, resist God. I am not resisting anymore. 

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Im a child of the internet now. As much as I’d like to connect with my cousins and family it has just been too long. I am more familiar with strangers now.

I am really struggling here with my family and am being challenged.

I don’t want to be taken advantage of but I also don’t want to take advantage of others. It’s hard for me to draw the line when I am with people who are calculating. I’m an all or nothing person.

[itstimeforanewblog]

I come from an A type mother and a B type father and I myself am O type and everyday I am affirmed that personality could really be highly dependent on a persons blood type.

This graphic is so true. Just imagine how hard it is for an open hearted, genuine, simple, honest, kind person to live among others with guarded hearts and such complex ways.

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I feel a bond with everybody who has stayed on Tumblr past the content restrictions. I’m here for you all.

[itstimeforanewblog]

The only thing is Eckhart Tolle. If I followed him I would give up my body completely, be slack, be soft, be non resistant, be still, be feminine. God knows I have tried to do this, tried and suffered, tried and failed. I suppose the my bet guess as to why I failed is the lack of informing others of my spiritual identity or attempt at spiritual identity. If clearing out my muscle of fat works and become calmer, healthier , happier, able to meditate better, avoid the terribly painful “overload” days then I will continue and count it as a victory. If I am unable to I will go again towards the spiritual life but this time tell everyone I am doing so.

[itstimeforanewblog]

Maybe it will work? Maybe I’ll be able to prevent the horrible state that I’ve come to know, which is when my blood feels like there is acid in it and I can’t sleep and the next day is written off. What can I call this state? What I think it is is high blood sugar because the muscles entry ways are blocked by fats. Maybe it will work and I will have stability and can begin to fix my life!? That would be great. I would start by getting a job and saving money and then moving away, but more importantly is probably making some friends and getting some people to know about me and who I am and what my life means, and loving me!

[itstimeforanewblog]

Moving forward I am going to focus on doing whatever I need to do to make sure the intramyocellular lipids are used up and out of my muscles. This could mean fasting, this could me restricting fat intake, this could mean working out or manually breathing more throughout the day. Whatever have to do to prevent my body from getting in the state in which carbs ingested somehow stay in the blood. I am open to ways to manage this. Maybe cutting out refined sugar? Maybe going ketogenic? Maybe fasting and ketogenic?

I feel like my body is combustible and that I must disarm it daily with breathing and muscle use if I want to not be unable to get out of bed in the morning. I wish I didn’t run so much in my younger life because I really think my body is kind of broken now unless I keep that level activity up... if I could do it over again I would have lifted weights instead of running.

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Is it possible that I cannot digest sugar and carbohydrates because my family hates me or I feel that my family hates me? It sounds crazy.

Some are loved and some are hated in families, that’s just the way it is. Hopefully those hated ones leave and find a better place but there is always someone on the bottom.

[itstimeforanewblog]

I’m feeling terrible today and the last couple of days. My grandmother passed away but it’s not just that I’ve been having terrible anxiety that’s prevented me from getting sleep the two of the three previous nights. I don’t know how much this even connected I think it might just be coincidental.

I do mourn my grandmother but I have mostly lost touch with that side of the family.

I have digestive issues. It could be gluten, it could be crohns or colitis but maybe it is actually more connected to my family then I realize.

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Am I attached to the past? Am I holding on tightly to things and it’s making me sick? 

Nate is ascetic, but definitely going upwards. What do I want for him? I want a break for him. I want a space for him to be physically experessed in. 

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When you open up to good things sometimes it means letting go of those specific things that you have failed to manifest. 

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Good things are coming in to your life

[itstimeforanewblog]

Give in the way the you can give. When you do this you’ll be shown other ways to give.