kal31d0sc0p1c

[kal31d0sc0p1c]

ok but why can i relate but at the same time kinda like,,

sobs in corner

i def have someone in my life like this but i know they don't really feel the same towards me. if i told them i loved them they might think i'm weird, or making a joke/prank, or maybe think it's in a romantic way something,,,,,,

"i love you" "haha thats funny" "no seriously. i love you" "haha sure thanks bye"

"i love you" "arent u aroace" "yes but-" "so ur not aroace?"

"i love you" "ewww were just friends"

NO BUT WHEN I TOLD SOMEONE THAT I LIKED HIM(not romantic/sexual) THEY THOUGHT I WAS ASKING TO (romantically) DATE THEM

NO. I JUST WANTED TO FUCKING TELL U, NOT DATE U. IM AROACE. NO. WHO SAID IM STRAIGHT, BITCH???

I think I love you

but not in the way couples do. couples love and love and love and they live in their own little bubble of contentment. couples love and they're infatuated. their heart flutters when they hear their partner's name.

i don't feel that, and i don't think i ever will. but what i have with you is special. i can't call it anything else but love, because like is too small of a word to describe what i feel towards you. it's a small, little thing, that slowly brings me into this state of existing with you. i don't want to do anything with you. i just want to exist by your side, and i don't care if you fall in love. but i love you, and that's the word i'll use for it.

i love you, with all your imperfections and your shyness. i love you, for the way you are, i love you, for the way you always gave me time and space. i love you, for defending me. i love you, for being here for me. i love you, for being so good and everything i'm not.

i

love

you.

you're brilliant and amazing and you can't see it. you're brighter than anything else in my world, and i would like to say that i think you saved me. from myself, and from everyone else around me.

i don't think i can ever express all i feel towards you, so i hope you understand when i say i love you!

[kal31d0sc0p1c]

introvert limbo (sorta vent post?)

I made it up, but "introvert limbo" is, as an introvert, where you, an introvert TRYING to socialize for the first time, just awkwardly stand in the middle of a very active conversation-- typically with two other people-- could be more, but the whole point is that, even if you want to, you somehow can't find a way to be part of the conversation, no matter how hard you try.

i keep going into the introvert limbo and it sucks. i want to talk to them, and i tried, but i get one reply and them I'm just nothing again. like i was never there.

it's not really like hell, because as an introvert, I'm perfectly fine not talking to anyone. but it's a limbo because I'm in between hell and heaven. heaven being, "great! you don't have to talk to anyone!" and hell being, "they probably just don't like you and don't want to talk to you".

for me, I don't understand why I'm still stuck in limbo.

why am i stuck? why can't i get over it and move on? why is this so fucking difficult?

if anyone relates, i'm genuinely so sorry.

[kal31d0sc0p1c]

me omw

to go tumble into the abyss.

my friend asked me truth or dare

i said truth

they asked what do i not like about them

bruh.

[kal31d0sc0p1c]

(also me)

"i identify as a girl" "i identify as a boy" "i identify as nonbinary"

i identify as a fucking menace

[kal31d0sc0p1c]

R A I N B O W pure vanilla cookie ✨️ (I drew that)