Rather Ardently
Spencer Reid x BAUfem! Reader
Category: Angsty Fluff
TW: Cursing, marital problems, mentions of cheating (itâs not really, actually happening, Reader just thinks it is), mentions of schizophrenia and Alzheimerâs
Based on a request from @whale-of-a-time :Â Hey there! I love your writing, you are so talented! I have a request for a Spencer x fem!bau!reader where she and Spencer are married and then he starts having his headaches so he seeks out help from Maeve. She doesnât die or anything but they become friends and reader starts to feel insecure about herself because of how much Maeve and Spencer has in common and then Spencer realises but her reassures that he loves her? Is that okay? Hope youâre safe and healthy during everything.
This was taken from a request and then mixed with a very loose concept Iâd had rolling around in my brain for a while. Iâm a big reader (duh, arenât we all?) and a massive Jane Austen fan. If you havenât seen the film Austenland and are an Austen fan, I highly recommend, but this is based a bit on that as well, except set in the United States, and not in the UK. This might seem super silly as a framing device, but the second I got this request I knew I could combine the ideas and I got so very excited. This is also the first time I get to be super specific about which season Spencer Reid this is, which Iâve never done before, but this is Season 7-Season 8 Spencer. Reader and Spencer met/started dating around Season 2 and got engaged in Season 5. This is set near the beginning of Season 8, and they finally got married ten months prior during Season 7, making this set during their first year of marriage (youâll see, hopefully that makes sense - this timeline was partially written for my own benefit). Also, if you are a Maeve fan (as I am), this is kind of anti-Maeve (I speak of her in an extremely passive way, but the Reader is not a fan; I also might somewhat imply that she likes Spencer more than he likes her). Thank you so much for the request @whale-of-a-time - I hope you enjoy it! Also, shout out to @homooseâ for helping me with some of the dialogue in this!Â
And to all of you: I love you whoever you are. While I was working on this, I passed 500 followers and, somehow, now have over 650, which is insane for my little mind. Thank you so very much for your support. Again, I love you all and hope youâre having an excellent season! xx
~ âI do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.â - Jane Austen ~
Was it bad to wish that you kind ofâŠwerenât as good at your job as you are? Because if you were less good at your job, the two of you wouldnât be sitting, - rotting, really - in this abominable tension. The thought crosses Spencerâs mind for the second time in the hour as the two of you are driven to The Winchell House. They say the first year of marriage is the hardest, but, Spencer didnât know who âtheyâ were and heâs sure not even the omnipotent âtheyâ couldâve imagined such an unusual predicament for him and his new wife.Â
The Winchell House is a mock-Georgian mansion that sits in the middle of Maine, the rainy climate adding to the attempt at a British atmosphere as much as the summer long Jane Austen retreat the mansion has hosted every year for the past fifteen years. However, this summer, among the Austenites, there had been a series of two rather grisly murders over the course of two weeks. Both victims had been found, arms and legs strapped to a plinth, a small concrete slab, that sat in the middle of the pond at the back of the property. The cause of death was asphyxiation, caused by a wire strapping their necks to the plinth, the particular knot used causing the rope to tighten as the victim struggled. The murders were grisly, but completed quickly and meticulously, even when extra security had been added to the property. The retreat, which ran from the end of June to August, was the brainchild of a British-American immigrant named Evelyn McCleary, whoâd contacted the FBI, desperate for help. And that is how you and Spencer came into the mix.Â
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a change in place
cw: fluff, strangers to lovers, canon level violence, pre-atsv events, blood, needles, mention of food
wc: 3.1k
pairing: miguel o'hara x civilian!reader
It had started as a regular day, regular enough actually. It was raining hard, and your boots were getting wet and then there was a flash of purple, yellow and red and three people fell from the sky.
You were on your way to work, needing to get to work on time this once. The rain has been keeping you back all week- youâre not sure how your boss would take it if youâre late for the fourth time.Â
âMake sure you clear the area of civilians!â you hear and quicken your pace. Whatever is going on, you want no part of it.Â
Youâre speed walking, trying to avoid puddles of water in the cracks on the pavement when a metal appendage is flung in your path.Â
âHey!â you yell, turning to the direction of the body to see the three spider-people tying whoever it is theyâve been fighting with their webs.Â
One of them turns to you, black spider eyes blinking at you. Thereâs a little chill that runs down your arms as he leans his body in your direction, like he wants to hear what it is you have to say.Â
âWatch where youâre throwing those limbs around!â you donât linger for something else to fall in your path, stepping over the limb as you carry on your way.Â
Thereâs commotion behind you, but youâre trying not to look. You donât want another thing flung at you.Â
As it turns out, not looking wasnât the best decision because you hear a shout and before you know it your umbrella is falling to the ground and your feet are hovering over it as youâre pulled off to an alleyway.Â
âLet go of me!â you twist and come face to face with the spider-person youâd reprimanded. âWhatâs your deal?âÂ
âDo you go around grabbing every girl by the waist to save them from imminent danger?âÂ
You canât see the manâs expression behind his mask, but you assume he isnât smiling by the tone in his voice,Â
âDo you go around telling off Spider-people?â you offer a real smile this time.Â
âWhen theyâre not careful, course I do! That arm couldâve taken my head off.âÂ
They donât answer; only jut their chin to the villain theyâd been webbing bursting through the constraints and is charging down the street, trampling the cars that had been alongside you.Â
âOh,â you gasp, the spider-person putting you down.Â
âYou couldâve been crushed.â they say and you flash an embarrassed smile as the person stands on the ground.Â
Before the man can say any more, thereâs a little holographic woman that pops up on his shoulder that makes you gasp.Â
âAre you a fairy?â you ask, reaching a hand to the woman in yellow who flits around the manâs shoulders and head.
âOh no sweetheart. Iâm this oneâsâ her thumb points to the man standing beside you. âAI companion, though I guess AI is a bit wrong, because I do everything for him. Heâs a little temperamental.âÂ
You giggle at her teasing. He grumbles Spanish under his breath.Â
âHelp him improve his vision, I almost lost my head.â The man wants to argue, but youâre bending down for your umbrella and shaking it. You turn to him, âThis was really nice and all but I gotta get to work.âÂ
He nods, watching you walk off. The woman returns, this time taunting him. âFor someone so against love, you sure feel attraction pretty quickly.âÂ
âLyla, scan for any more anomalies.âÂ
-
The next time you see the Spider-people, youâre on your way back from school. Itâs late, too late for crime in your city- most everyone is asleep at this time. Except you, and your ten assignments that were due about an hour ago.Â
Youâve treated yourself to an Earl Grey tea and three slices of pistachio cake.Â
However, the Spider-people are trying to ruin it. Youâre not sure since when your city had gotten so many super-villains that they needed to defeat but here they are again.Â
âWatch out!â you hear, the man in the red and navy spider suit from the last time comes swooping down, webbing himself to the bakery youâd just left and pushing you back inside. Even the owner is shocked.Â
âWe have to stop meeting like this,â you say to him, tucking the hair in your face backwards.Â
âWe do.â he seems a lot more tense than the last time youâd run into each other.Â
âIs this one worse than the âGiant Metal Octopusâ from last time?â youâre quoting your local newspaper as you speak.Â
He doesnât say anything to your question, just taps at his wrist before a series of little robots pop out. They look like the prongs of a âyâ on a tiny ball.Â
âThese should keep you safe, donât leave the panaderĂa till I come back,â thereâs no time to even say good luck before heâs gone.Â
You turn to the old man as the little robots attach themselves to the door of the bakery, âHe was strange, no?âÂ
It takes hours before theyâre done, and after the day youâve had, youâre barely able to keep your eyes open.Â
The large Spider-man comes in, his robots hopping back to his wrists and disappearing in his watch. He addresses the old man first, whispering apologies about keeping him awake so long, to which the man responds with a flick of his wrist. âWe all need a protector, right kid?âÂ
Then he turns to you, âOye,â you blink owlishly at him as you stand, shoving your pastries into your bag. âHow far do you live?âÂ
You wave off his concern, âTwo miles from here, sânot far.âÂ
He follows after you as you leave the bakery. âIf youâre going to walk me back, could I know your name? Just in case you turn psycho-murderer on me ?âÂ
The man scoffs. You can tell heâs deliberating if he should give you his name and before you can tell ânevermindâ he mutters, âMiguel.â
You introduce yourself, âWhy did you become Spider-man?â you ask, looking back at the man whoâs still in his mask.Â
âWasnât much of a choice.âÂ
âOkaay,â you think, ânot big on conversation.â
Thereâs silence for about twenty paces before you ask, âWhy didnât you go back to wherever you come from, like the other spider-people? Do you have a crush on me?âÂ
Again he scoffs, and the little woman from last time appears on his shoulder, âMiguel, thereâs no more anomaly activity here.âÂ
âAnomalies? Like things that arenât supposed to be here?â you ask and Miguel bats at Lyla who looks shocked when she sees you. âAre you supposed to be here?âÂ
He grumbles and you imagine his lips in a straight line that looks almost comical for someone as big as him. âYes, Iâm supposed to be here.âÂ
You pout, dramatised and exaggerated, âHere I thought you just kept coming back for me.âÂ
The little woman in yellow pipes up, âWell, he-âÂ
Miguel cuts her off, âLyla, go away.â She does; much to your dismay.Â
You stop before your apartment door and Miguel lets out a small chuckle at the door. Itâs painted a blue that resembles his suit, and thereâs a fairy on the handle. âNot all of us can get to your level of brooding mystery, Miguel.â you say with a bashful smile as you fiddle with the key and the lock.Â
âNot judging, it just makes sense.â you hum, reaching into your bag.Â
âDo you have nut allergies?â you ask, reaching into the bag as your eyes remain trained to his face to get his answer.Â
He shakes his head, âno,â and you brandish one of the slices of cake.Â
âTake it,â you say when his hand doesnât move. âAs a token of gratitude.â you say with a performative lovelorn tone.Â
Miguel lets another chuckle escape before taking it, âThanks, coqueta,â his hand makes the slice of cake look foolishly small and that makes your eyes widen a little. Youâre not sure if he can tell, but he teases, âMake sure you lock up.âÂ
You donât see it but Miguel fights the urge to let one of his nanobots stay on your doorstep camera.Â
For no reason really, just to make sure youâre safe.Â
-
The next few weeks you delve deep into trying to track him down, trying to get even a crumb of who he is. You come up with nothing and then decide to take a different approach.Â
Someone who can make such advanced tech has got to get the information and the funding from somewhere.
Again, you find nothing.
âWho is this man?â you mutter to yourself, chopsticks holding a potsticker near your mouth.
You take a bite just as thereâs a knock on your window. Your heart is in your throat and you grab your phone and a knife you have laid on your coffee table.Â
The knock sounds again, a little more impatient as you draw closer. As you look up, you spot a familiar red and blue suit and let out a big breath.Â
Opening your window, Miguelâs eyes widen at the sight of the knife, âMost women donât take well to strangers knocking on their window,â you say amused at the way heâs holding himself on your window sill.
âIâm sorry,â then as a second thought he murmurs, âYou were asleep.â clearly catching your tired eyes.Â
âNot exactly,â you lean towards him and whisper, âAre there anomalies here? Is that why youâre here?âÂ
Miguel almost cracks a smile at your stage whisper.Â
âNo, Iâm here to give you something.â he pulls a box from his pocket. Youâre surprised that his suit can have pockets, it seems stuck to him.Â
âWhat for?â you look up at him, eyebrows drawn low with your teeth nibbling on your bottom lip.Â
âRepayment,â Miguel explains, âfor the cake.â
You canât argue when he opens the box and shows you a little pair of fairy wing earrings. âI highly doubt this was the same price of a two dollar slice of cake.âÂ
Theyâre delicate things as you peer at them in the box. The pair are almost holographic in colour, swirls and delicate lines indenting the wings- like those from the fairy illustrations youâve seen almost about a thousand times. Youâre enamoured by them; by the effort it more than likely took to get a pair like this.Â
âNo, they were a little over four dollars. Lyla spotted them for me.âÂ
Your face flushes, then you gather yourself, âSo youâve been thinking about me then?â Miguel indulges your flirting with a chuckle.Â
Heâs nervous though, or annoyed, youâre not sure youâre reading him right- but to aid your assessment, his hands are shoved into his pockets and his head hangs low beneath the mask. âTheyâre beautiful.â you say, taking them from his hand and inspecting them close up.Â
âThereâs a little amethyst stone on the end of it.â he says and you smile wide.Â
âYou went through all that trouble,â you say and Miguel frowns. âDo you want to come inside or are you just making your Spider-rounds?âÂ
âSpider-rounds?â Heâs confused and intrigued by you at the same time.
âYeah you know, your little patrol of the city to make sure everyoneâs sleeping soundly and safe from the anomalies.âÂ
Miguel shakes his head, âI think youâre letting your imagination run away from you.âÂ
Before the conversation can go further, Lyla pops up, eye mask pulled up as she says, âSome Vulture thing just came through a tear in the arachno-humanoid poly multiverse,â as a secondary thought she turns to you, âHey honey, might want to get inside.âÂ
Itâs a blur, the moment between the Vulture attacking Miguel and him getting his mask on and pushing you into your apartment.Â
You hear a lot of crashing, shattering and grunts. Youâd never been close during the other battles, but now itâs quite literally on your doorstep and you feel the pin pricks of panic settle in your chest and fingers.Â
If youâd had a little more blood pumping to your brain you might have stayed inside your apartment, hiding behind the door and the little fairy earrings. But your door is opened and youâre rushing outside to catch a glimpse of Miguel on the Vultureâs back claws digging into its back as he tries to get it to yield.Â
He spots you, eyes widening behind the mask as he catches you walking towards him and the Vulture.Â
âGet back in the house!â Miguel yells, the distraction enough to have the Vulture throwing him off his back and making his way to you as you hold your hands to your mouth as you watch Miguelâs body hit the ground hard.Â
âHello dear, why was the Spider-man visiting you?â The Vulture is on his way to you when you grab a rock and launch it towards his head. It hits him square in the forehead, but it doesnât slow him.Â
His wings are enveloping you in seconds, your screams ringing out as youâre off the ground.
âPretty enough, maybe we could get a reaction from the Spider-man.âÂ
Itâs not like when Miguel had saved you those last two times- this time your heart is beating in your throat and your fingers are trying to grip some part of the Vulture that will cause him pain.Â
He gets to you first though, talons biting into your obliques and your bicep. Thereâs a burning sensation and youâre not sure if itâs poison or if itâs just the pain- but it stings like all hell.Â
You fight and twist, trying to get a good grip on him. You pull on the feathers just under his neck and you pull. As his wings open, and youâre free-falling you get why people would want to skydive. Thereâs an adrenaline rush that makes you feel like you could actually fly. It makes you sympathise with Icarus; the boy had a taste of a freedom thatâs usually not afforded to humans and itâs freeing in a way that makes you accept the splat thatâs going to be you hitting the pavement.Â
Miguel doesnât let it happen.
His nanobots form a blanket on the ground, holding you as he rushes off to capture the Vulture.Â
âLyla, call Margo and tell her open the multiverse anomaly receiver.âÂ
You donât hear much of what her response is because your hand is covered in blood as you press it to your side.Â
âCoqueta, pensĂ© que dije que me quedara adentro?â I thought I said to stay inside? Miguelâs hand moves to his watch, giving new instructions to his nanobots that mould to your open wounds. âYou have a hard time listening, donât you?âÂ
You look up at him, breathing harshly, âSometimes pretty people distract me. I thought you said, âFor sure come outside, I need help,â itâs easy to mix up the words.âÂ
âYou donât even know what I look like,â He points out and watches you roll your eyes as best as you can in your current position, âHold on to me.â He thinks better of the simple instruction and lifts his mask up to look at you, âI mean exactly what I said. Hold on to me.âÂ
Swinging with an open wound wasnât as nice as the other times. This time you could tell Miguel was very conscious of where his hands were and how much pressure he was applying to your body.
You're wherever Miguel stays, and it looks very him. The room he takes you to is full of dark reds and blues, matching his suit completely. âDid you want to camouflage in your own office?â youâre a little breathless as you speak, body tired and growing even more tired as you lose more and more blood.Â
Miguel doesnât say anything, he just clears a table and lays you on it. âDonât scream or anything. The other Spider-people are asleep.âÂ
âThereâs more of you?âÂ
He gives one deft nod and then digs around his desk till he pulls out a first aid kit.Â
Your eyes are fluttering shut and Miguel notices your breathing getting worse.Â
âDonât close your eyes.â he instructs, tapping your cheek lighting to get you to open your eyes again.Â
âIâm tired,â you groan, jolting away from his hand on your hip. You melt into it when you open your eyes and find Miguel staring intently at you. âYou couldâve left me at the hospital.â
âAnd explain your wounds how?â he holds an antiseptic cloth in his hand. âThis might sting.â you nod, biting your lip as the cold cloth presses against your side.
âFuck,â you murmur, clenching your fists as he finishes cleaning the blood. Miguel tries to distract you but talking to strangers isnât really his strong suit.Â
âIs this your first time getting stitches?â he asks and you hum- a broken little sound as the needle pierces your skin. Miguel feels awful at the sound, âIâm sorry, itâs going to pinch the whole way through.âÂ
You nod, trying not to focus on the way the needle pinches on your side with every stitch. âDo you have to stitch yourself a lot? Is that why youâre good at this?âÂ
Miguel doesnât say anything to your question, just ponders the way you put on a brave face as he closes the stitch.Â
The second time the needle pierces your skin you feel your head spin, âThink Iâm gonna pass out,â you say and Miguel frowns.Â
You hadnât looked that bad to Miguel, but he feels his mistake fester and feels the way it can all go wrong so quickly.Â
âLyla, get her vitals up on the screen,â he instructs, hoping the nerves arenât reflected in his voice, watching as your blood pressure drops. âFuck,â
You go to say something but Miguel stops you, âYouâll have to stay here tonight. Thereâs no way youâre going back to your apartment.âÂ
Your eyes feel heavy as you look at him, âOkay,â you twist to lay flat again but the movement seems to have taken the last bit of energy from you. âIâm sorry.â Your bones liquify and your breathing is even and Miguel swears lowly.Â
His chest feels heavy and achy. Â
âLooks like youâre getting bedside manner training,â Lyla coos as she finishes displaying all your vitals.Â
âI just donât want her to die here, Lyla. When sheâs a bit more stable Iâll take her to my room.â Miguel uses a gentle hand to brush your hair from your face, and he takes a moment to let his affection guide him as his thumb strokes the slope of your nose then the curve of your lip.
âYou wonât die, no one else is dying,â the words are whispered as he finishes sewing you up, taking his time in cleaning the wound before sitting back in his seat, just watching your vitals till theyâre good enough for him to move you to his room.
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Shouldn't I want you?
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader
Summary: Spencer lets you break up with him, thinking he is not enough for you
Words: 2.1k
Warnings: angst, happy ending, arguments, mentions of ice-cream, lots of tears, swear words, use of y/n and pet names, mentions of Spencer being in prison
----------------------------------------------------
Spencer has been acting weird lately. And you don't know why. He's been so distant. Making different excuses on why he couldn't make it to the dates.
He's also started texting you less and less. And the calls just seem forced from your side, like he doesn't even want to speak with you while away on cases.
It's honestly breaking your heart, and maybe that's Spencer's plan. To just break your heart so you would break up with him.
It's making you so anxious that you wait everyday for the text from him that will say 'It's over. I'm breaking up with you.' But it doesn't come, and you don't know what to think of it. You don't even know why would he want to break up. You don't think that you've done anything wrong, and you are very certain that Spencer hasn't done anything wrong either. This whole thing is just so unusual.
On the one hand, Spencer is almost ghosting you, but on the other hand he doesn't want to break up? You are so confused about the whole situation.
You are crying over the break-up that hasn't even happened yet, watching your tv with a big bowl of ice cream in your lap. Spencer's supposed to come home today from a case, but you know he's not going to come to your apartment. He hasn't done that in the last few weeks, not since he's started being so distant.
So you sit in a pit of your tears, cheesy rom-coms and a bucket of ice cream. Suddenly, there's a knock on your door, and looking at the clock you know exactly who it is.
You panic, you didn't expect him to come. You quickly wipe your tears away, and hide the ice cream in the freezer. You know that you look puffy anyways as you open the door with a big sigh and a fake smile.
Spencer, of course, sees right through it.
"Hi- what's wrong?" Spencer immediately asks with a frown. He pushes you gently out of the doorway, and steps inside too as he closes the door.
"N-nothing," you lie, trying to force a smile on your face, "what...what are you doing here?"
A quick flash of hurt and confusion passes over Spencer's face, "I wanted to see you."
You suck in a shaky breath,"oh."
"Oh?" Spencer asks, baffled. "Seriously sweetheart, what's wrong?"
"Don't-Don't call me that," you whisper, eyes on the ground.
"What?" Spencer's eyes go wide, "I shouldn't call you sweetheart?"
You sigh, and look up at Spencer. He looks so lost by what you mean, and for a split of a second you think good, let him be confused. You've been confused for the last few weeks because of him. But then you remember that it's Spencer, still very much the Spencer you love.
"Yes, you shouldn't," you sniffle a little, "because it's only hurting me more."
"I-" Spencer starts.
"Spencer, just let me finish. I think that we both know that you don't want to be in a relationship with me anymore. So please Spencer, let's just not do this anymore. I can't keep going on like this, it's-it's just too much. It hurts too much," you say, your cheeks wet with tears yet again.
Spencer stays quiet, it's actually one of the rare times that he doesn't know what to say, and it just breaks your heart even more.
"Y-you won't even say anything? No reason why?" your voice breaks in the middle of the sentence. But looking at Spencer's teary eyes and completely shut mouth, you know, you two are done.
"I-It's over, Spencer. Please just go, you can come take your things some other day," you don't even wait for him to say anything. You go open the door and look anywhere, but him while he slowly leaves.
You don't have the courage to look at him. You hear him sniffle, but don't look. You can't see his broken face, it would be even worse than it already is.
Spencer leaves, and you slam the door shut behind him. It feels like your heart is being cut open by millions of tiny glass pieces as soon as the door closes.
You barely manage to walk towards the couch before you break down. Sobs violently shaking with your body.
-
A few days go by, and it's only when you don't pick up your phone on like the 20th try does Penelope march into your apartment.
You reluctantly open the door after she knocks, and knocks, insisting she's not leaving until you open the door.
"Hi," you greet her, and you immediately notice her slightly shocked face at the sight of you. And you get it. You haven't slept properly for the last few days, and the almost constant tears can't help either.
"Oh my gosh, honey, come here," Penelope instantly pulls you into an embrace, and you melt into it like a puddle.
She squeezes you tightly until you're ready to let go. "Pen, what...what are you doing here? Did Spencer send you?"
"Don't even say his name. He's in big, big trouble," she says in her own angry way. A small smile appears on your face when she says it.
"I can't believe he's done this. He can be such an idiot sometimes even if he really is a genius," you don't argue with that, but you don't want to talk about Spencer either. He's been on your mind enough as it is right now.
"Can we...can we not talk about it? I just want to get over it, and move on as soon as possible, "you sigh. You let Penelope in, and you want to make her go sit down to the living room while you make the tea, but she insists on staying in the kitchen with you.
"Believe me, honey, I wouldn't want to talk about Spencer if it wasn't important," she starts, and your mind immediately goes to the worst possible scenario.
Seeing your wide, worried eyes she adds, "he's okay. He's just stupid, that's all."
"Yeah," you agree quietly, even if you know that it's not true. Spencer maybe used to be clueless about things like relationships, but that has changed. He was never clueless in your relationship.
"Oh sweetheart, " Penelope rubs your shoulder in comfort, "I could beat him up for making you so sad."
Her very serious tone makes you let out a small chuckle. You and her both know that she wouldn't even hurt a fly let alone Spencer, her dear friend.
"Thanks, Penny, but it's okay, I'm okay. Spencer didn't want to be with me anymore, and i-i made my peace with that or-or at least i will eventually."
"But that's just it. That's what I came here to tell you. Spencer loves you, and he just let dumb people with dumb opinions get to his head," you almost burn yourself with the warm water for the tea when you hear her words.
"What do you mean?" you quizz. You forget about the tea, and turn to her.
"He'd heard some people talk about you and him. Some colleagues saw you two together somewhere, and started gossiping. He heard them say that you're too good for him with him being in prison and all-"
"What? That's just ridiculous," you exclaim, you've never heard such a bullshit before.
Of course, you know that Spencer was in prison, but you also know he was innocent. You knew Spencer even before he went to prison, and maybe he did change a bit, but he was still the same Spencer. The Spencer you've always been in love with.
"Exactly, I told him the same, but he wouldn't listen, " she looks sympathetically at you, "I think that Spencer just loves you so much that he's willing to let you go for better or worse."
You are stunned. You stand there absolutely baffled, and Penelope just looks at you with understanding. It takes you good few minutes to finally say something.
"You knew about this?" you question as you head towards the door with Penelope on your heels.
"No, I found out yesterday otherwise I would have told you sooner," you quickly put on your shoes as you listen to her.
"I know you would. Thank you for telling me this, Pen. You're the best," you give her a tight hug.
"He's at home right now," she tells you, you appreciatively smile at her, and basically run to your car with Spencer on your mind.
-
When Spencer opens his door, you instantly push yourself inside. You don't give him even a second to react, protest or say anything.
"Spencer Reid!" you start angrily. "I can't fucking believe you. You let us break up over some stupid gossip? And you didn't even tell me?" You say, hurt.
"It's not stupid, it's true-" Spencer starts calmly, a complete contrast to you. But on the inside he feels like he's going to pass out. It was already hard for him without seeing you, but now it feels like hundred times worse.
"Like hell it is!" you argue. "Spencer of course you're enough for me. I don't care what anyone says. It's not even true anyways. I don't care that you've been in prison, i don't care about any of it."
"But it is true. I'm no good for you. You can do so much better, sweetheart. Like look at me," he gestures towards himself, " I'm such a mess, my life is always messy. You don't deserve this kind of life, you deserve so so much better. You don't deserve to be waiting late at night for me to come home, wondering if i even come home. I can't let you have that kind of life. I'm not worth it."
Finally, Spencer lets the tears go down his cheeks freely. He knows what he is giving up by breaking up with you. He'd planned his whole life with you by his side. But it's better this way. Well that's at least what he is telling himself anyway.
"Don't you get it, Spencer?" you laugh dryly from the frustration, "I don't want better. I don't want anyone else. I just want you. I want you, Spence."
You sniffle slightly, and look at Spencer with hopeless eyes begging him to understand.
"You shouldn't, sweetheart, you shouldn't want me," Spencer tells you helplessly, running his hands through his hair.
You take a brave step towards him.
"Why shouldn't I?" you start. "Shouldn't I want the sweetest, the kindest person I know in my life? Shouldn't I want to be with the person that makes me smile, and makes my heart go fast? Shouldn't I want to be with somebody I completely trust? Shouldn't I want my best friend in my life forever? Shouldn't I want somebody who I feel safe with? Shouldn't I be with somebody I love the most?"
"So Spencer you tell me? Shouldn't i? Shouldn't i want you?" your cheeks are wet from the flowing tears, too.
Spencer shakes his head. You're impossible. How could he ever think that you'd just get over him without questioning why. He should have known better than that.
Spencer takes the final step that's between you two, and softly wipes away the tears from your puffy cheeks.
"I just want what's best for you," he whispers with a broken voice. Looking right into your watery eyes.
"Then let me have you!" You point at his chest with a sniffle. You see Spencer's face soften, like he finally understands.
Spencer's hands move from your cheeks to your hips, and he pulls you closer to him. "A-are you sure?"
"Spencer, you're unbelievable, " you say, vexed, "there's no one else for me Spence. No one."
Your words are the final thing for Spencer to breakdown, to allow himself to be with you. He pulls you towards him, hugging you oh so tightly. He hides his face into the space between your neck and shoulder. You feel the wetness of his tears run down your skin.
"There's no one else for me, too," he whispers into your shoulder. You hum in agreement, not ready to say anything yet.
After a few minutes you pull away, caressing Spencer's cheek you smile at him. "I love you," you mumble, "Please don't ever let people get to your head like this. At least not without telling me, yeah?"
"Yeah," Spencer says in hushed voice, leaning into your gentle touch. "I love you, thank you for not letting me be an idiot."
You both chuckle, sniffling, and it finally feels like it's all going to be okay. Like your worlds won't be ending after all.
You and Spencer go snuggle on his couch, content to be near each other again after the few days apart, and even if you know that there's still a conversation to be held tomorrow, you feel happy.
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Could I request a oneshot with Remus Lupin with the promt "kiss me so i can feel alive again". Also congratulations on 1000 followers đâšđ
ALIVE AND TRUE
PAIRING: Remus Lupin x reader
WORD COUNT: 2k (whoops)
SUMMARY: Having found a lost friend, living in the countryside of Yorkshire, feelings of once hidden affection start to bloom in the need to be alive and good things to be real.
A/N: Thank you for requesting and Iâm so sorry for taking so long! This is one of my favorites because itâs so soft and romantic and I adore this request. Please tell me what you think of it xo.
WARNINGS: Angst.
support my writing through ko-fiđ
MASTERLIST
Itâs the house you see from trudging down the walkway that forces you to double take your previous steps. Silent and empty, it seems to twist into the forest from afar. Bent trees adorn the lane with overgrown greenery at its feet and ancient brick walls that run along with it. The fields in Yorkshire are vast and immaculate but right now, you are alone and suddenly the far stretch of land doesnât seem to have the shine of the countryside. Your eyes shift to the house that sits behind a rusted gate, joints barely holding together from the years of rotting and exposure to the heat and rain. Itâs barely a house but more of a cottage. No, itâs not even a cottage. Semi-derelict and tumbledown, it looks more like the ruins of what used to be a home.
You look down to the note in your hand, parchment torn at the edges with the cursive words of your handwriting that make up an address and coordinates. Visually, thereâs no indication of where exactly you are but according to the coordinates, you are precisely where you need to be. For the past three years, your investigation into finding your friend has proven to be impossible and almost met with the acceptance that you will never see him again. Yet, after an anonymous tip had been owled to your doorstep, indicating the suspicions of the presence of a werewolf somewhere in Yorkshire as overheard by the locals of a nearby town, gave you a tinge of hope to reconnect with someone you lost.
The sight bears a high chance that he may be hiding here, unfortunately. It makes it hard to believe that someone you saw had so much life in him, is living in this condition.
Anxiety starts to creep onto you as you push the worn-down gate. It creaks with the rustling of the wind, a sign of an imminent storm. The sun doesnât shine anymore, clouds of grey congregate in the skies above in the chorus of rainfall. You donât do too well with apparition, thankfully having only lost half of your hair during the war. Hence, if the anonymous tip turns out to be a fake, you would have to make your way out of the countryside in the rain or even worse, take the Knight Bus.
You hate the Knight Bus.
Attempting to conjure up whatever courage you have left, you steadily make your way into the compound, plodding through the overgrown grass. As you grow closer, the cottage looks even worse than it was from afar, climbing plants of dull green embellish the walls of the ruins.
Then, in your periphery, you catch a glimpse of violetâBluebells. The same flowers that used to grow on the forest floor of the forbidden forest. You remember him telling you about how he had seen a white bluebell, rare to its nature.
Warmth fills your chest, you know he is here.
The door is wooden, climbing plants seem to have made their way to it, branching around its handle.
You knock once. No answer.
You knock twice. Thereâs footsteps, theyâre heavy.
With the swing of the door, you are met with none other than Remus Lupin. He looks older, dark circles below his eyes that have lost their intensity of blue, hair unkempt and shabby, and a beard, tracing along his jawline. He has his wand directed to you in defense. Probably because no one ever visits.
The smile on your face is impossible to suppress. It's bright at the recognition of the familiarity of his face. âRemus,â you breathe, eyes crinkling and gleaming with the bliss from the effort and worth of your investigation to find this very man, who stands just a couple of inches away from you. You swallow, not wanting to blink away the possibility that this may all be a dream. âIâve been looking everywhere for you.â
He says your name through a whisper like itâs the answer to the millions of prayers recited and uttered from his lips as he drifts off to slumber under the moonshine, beaming through the shattered glass of the windows by his bedside. He dreams of you, often in times when his body is too weak to endure the aftermath of a full moon.
Yet, you're here and very real.
Then, he watches your grin falter and how your eyes move around the curves of his face. The deep cuts are there and visible. Although magic heals, time and energy play a crucial factor in healing wounds. In an instant, his apprehension creeps in, and suddenly, he feels small. The memories of you are forever intertwined with the rest of his friends, memories too painful to endure.
Your hand reaches out for his face but he staggers back in his step.
âYou shouldnât be here.â
He doesnât mean it. Remus really wants you here. To feel your warmth, your touch, the smell of your hair and to hold you but he sees the way you bring your arm down to your side, shoulders slump in near defeat. In reality, you would never let him go that easily.
âDonât say that, Remus.â
The crinkle of your eyes is gone, now sharp with the frustration of his tendency of locking himself away from the world out of paranoia. Itâs been a minute since youâve seen his face after three long years and heâs already trying to chase you away.
Typical Remus.
An odd sense of nausea takes over him, knees buckling as his surroundings begin to spin like he is on a sailing boat at sea. His body is frail and with a blow, he will fall. His eyes are trained on you as he feels his feet give way and his body drifting towards the ground. Just then, he feels your touch, arms around him like an embrace. Youâre holding him in his weakened stance, stabilizing his balance by moving his arm to hang around your shoulder. He immediately shifts his weight on you, uttering a soft apology.
âYou donât have to apologize for something you can't control.â Your voice is soothing, speaking so close to his ear. Your tone is laced with knowing and care. You both know those words have been articulated from your very lips many times before. And your hands are gentle upon the curve of his waist, against the rough material of a dress shirt but your grasp is strongâthe true touch of a healerâs hands, precise and careful. Remus always knew you would turn to become a highly-skilled healer.
With every cautious step, the creaks of the parquet flooring are loud and lasting. Itâs as if the house itself cries for its condition, like a child with a wound to their knee after taking a nasty fall. The wailing wind outside doesnât help with the fact that everything seems to be falling apart.
You guide him to the armchair by the fireplace, pressing him by the shoulders to sit. He plops onto the chair with a heavy sigh and feels a sense of regret sinking in his chest at the sight of the visible scowl of your lips and the turn of your brows.
Your open palm finds his cheek. He hears the drag of your deep exhale. You donât say anything, only to pull out your wand from your back pocket. Yet, Remus is quick to grab your hand, halting you in your movement. Your frown a little deeper, sharp eyes finding him.
âJust let me heal you. Itâs the least I can do.â
Itâs a promise, a vow, uttered from your very lips filled with dignity and hope. So, he lets you, just to feel you close to him.
â
The rain is yet to arrive. Thunder booming through rolling clouds above and still not a single drop of rain but thereâs a peak of sunlight between the cracks of the storm. Maybe, itâs because youâre here and sunshine always seems to trail your steps, no matter where they lead.
Now, Remus is seated on the toilet seat facing you, who has settled for a shaky stool to perch on as your gentle hands hold the edge of his jaw while the other grips onto a straight razor, gazing along the cheek. He cannot take his eyes off the crease between your brows and the way your eyes slowly shift along with the moving blade.
Magic is meant for convenience in small but necessary tasks like these yet you insisted on doing it in the traditional muggle wayâusing your fingers. Your hands work wonders, beautifully moving as a paraclete. You hold him like youâre maintaining his strength, to keep from fracturing into pieces. You look at him like heâs your masterpiece, carving every curve and bend of his skin and structure.
You lift the blade away from his face, dabbing it onto a rag cloth hung by the sink. Remus finally finds the time to speak. âYou donât have to do this.â You simply laugh and it comes out like a puff of air. Your eyes are still trained on cleaning off the razor. âOf course, I donât. But, I also donât want you competing with Dumbledoreâs beard.â
Remus laughs, truly laughs. Itâs loud and echoes within the walls of the tiny toilet. âI could never beat him.â Youâre laughing too, grin wide as ever. Then, after a beat of silence, your grin suppresses into a small smile, lips pressed together as you place the razor aside. Youâre clearly in deep thought.
âCome away with me.â
Remus blinks. âWhat?â
You turned to him, eyes glinting with expectancy. âStay with me. I live a few blocks from St Mungos...and you get to see me at work.â You watch how his mouth is now agape, half of his chin still in shaving cream.
âAnd Iâm sure you look magnificent in green but you know I canâtââ
âYou can, Remus. You can come here a week before the full moon and then come back to my place. Iâll help you heal, a lot faster and you know thatâs true. Maybe, I could get hold of aconite for Wolfsbane at the hospitalâ â
You hadnât realized your rambling until Remus began to shake you by the shoulders, calling out your name with an odd sense of serenity and hint of urgency for you to stop. So, your words immediately halt with a turn of your head to meet his gaze. Your expression is soft. His hand drifts to yours, holding it in his. âYou know I canât because if they find out you are living with someone with lycanthropy, you will lose your job and I donât want you to lose it for my sake,â he squeezes your hand with assurance. âBut, thank you. Thank you for always being so kind to me.â
The candle flickers from behind you, sitting idly on the ceramic shelf above the sink. No sunlight beaming through the room and only the hues of flame, beginning to shrink with the melting of its wax. Your hair presents an illusion of golden threads against the candlelight, face as warm as your hand on his as you shift your fingers to the back of his palm. Gradually, you sigh whilst raising his palm to you and press your lips to the arch of his hand. Itâs quick but affectionate.
Your stare is strong and his heart stutters for the millionth time since your arrival.
Remus is drawn to you and the thought of how your lips should be on his. He drifts closer, eyes roaming your face, feeling your breath against his skin.
âCan I kiss you?â your question is soft, a whisper, only for his ears. A secret so sacred that youâre afraid nature would hear the words of your confession that was solely reserved for your mind and the man you are confessing to. He nods, itâs slight but itâs true, feeling like this is all a dream. He doesnât want you to dream anymore. For you are here, hand tangled in his, thinking about his lips on yours.
Then, he whispers as the candle flickers once more. âKiss me so I can feel alive again.â
So, you do. You kiss him, gentle and sweet, your hand still in his.
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Red.
Remus Lupin x fem!reader
"I'd rather not see you at all."
"You'd miss me."
based on a request.
warnings: banter, probably fluff, my writing
8.1k
author's note: i dont know how i feel about this but enjoy. english is not my first language so beware <3
You stood on your feet, staring dead into the brown eyes before you. You weren't even aware of your frown, but you were sure you didn't look happy. His mocking eyes were eliciting you, sending waves of rage down your chest.
"How about you two sit together?" James asked, smiling with his eyes.
You reminded yourself that your anger wasn't aimed at James but rather at his tall and vexatious friend. Thus, instead of snapping at him, you sent him a mere warning glare.
"Or you can just fight. That'll work," James shrugged and turned around.
Your eyes averted back to Remus, who had slouched behind your deskâthe same desk you had been sitting behind for years.
"That is my seat, Lupin."
He didn't budge at all, keeping on staring at you.
"I didn't see your name on it."
You pinched the bridge of your nose. This boy was going to be the end of you.
"Remus," you said, "I've sat there last year and the year before that, please go find yourself another desk."
"It's a new school year, though, is it not? Make a change."
He must be testing your patience, which was at its limit. The lesson was about to start and yet you were still on your feet.
You blamed Remus for that.
The desk he had been resting behind was yours. You didn't need to write your name on it, everyone knew it was yours. For six years of Transfiguration, you had been sitting there, listening or sometimes disturbing the class with James and Sirius. It had a nice view of the board and could hide you well if needed.
Thus, you had always sat behind Pads and Prongs while Remus satâŠ
Well, you didn't know where he sat, but it was definitely not next to you.
"Miss Y/L/N, sit down please."
You closed your eyes for a moment when you heard Professor McGonagall's stern tone. With a quick glance around, it was obvious that you were the only one standing. So after a sharp exhale, you sat down next to Remus.
"Wanker."
Remus let out a derisive hum.
This. This was what would drive you crazy. This was what would make you want to strangle the boy, burn the body and get away with murder. That mocking, jeering and pleased hum.
James and Sirius would always tease you for not getting along with one person that anyone could get along with. Always fighting and bantering with one person that anyone could have a proper conversation with.
The problem was that they weren't exactly wrong.
You always witnessed how Remus was kind and gentle with everyone, rendering it absolutely impossible to bicker with him. He would smile and nod, easing his way out of every dilemma. He wouldn't pick a fight, and certainly wouldn't provoke anyone.
Except you.
With you, he was acting like a moronic person. Or that's what you thought.
When you were little, he would pull your braids in the mornings, but would mumble a quick 'I liked your hair today' in the evenings.
When you were famished for breakfast, he would grab the last waffle before you could, leaving you frowning with an aching hunger, but then leave bars of chocolate on your books during class breaks.
When you would be studying with the Marauders and couldn't cast a spell, he would smirk and mock your ineptness but would seek you out before the exam and explain how to move your wrist better than any professor could.
He would never disrespect you, but wouldn't let you stay sane throughout the day, either.
Lost between his inconsistent behaviours, you would find yourself confused, overthinking every tiny interaction to fathom if he cared for you or not. You would often decide on the latter.
For the sake of the other boys, you would ignore his gall and cheekiness. Although you had moments of outbursts, which would eventually lead to a bigger fight, you had managed to keep the problem under control so far.
"Miss, Y/L/N?"
You jerked your head up, finding the source of your name. McGonagall was piercing through you with her icy eyes, almost judging you for not listening, without voicing anything.
"Yes, professor?"
"Answer the question."
What question?
She asked a question?
You parted your lips, shuffling useless facts or overlooked memories in your mind to stumble upon the right one.
You felt one second drew out to one minute, or maybe it was simply your anxiety. Embarrassment was making its way under your skin with every second- or minute?
You were starting to sweat as your body was on fire.
"Levicorpus," Remus whispered under his mouth.
Not wasting a second, you repeated the word, earning a nod from the Professor. She turned away, carrying on with the lesson.
"What was the question?" you asked the boy. He didnât bother to look at you.
"Pay attention next time."
âJames, itâs a terrible, horrible, and incredibly foolish idea.â
You were dawdling around in the yard, enjoying the weather while you could. With the chill breeze mingling around your hair, nothing could ruin your peace. That is until the Marauders entered the scene.
âExactly. Thatâs why we should do it.â
Being friends with James and Sirius was hard, especially if youâre the only one with common sense. Who would believe making a firework explosion in the middle of the Great Hall would earn them a ball to celebrate Christmas?
James and Sirius.
âWe need to call Dumbledoreâs attention. Bring it right up to the headmaster, or it wonât work,â Sirius backed up his friend. You ignored Remusâs scoff-like laugh.
âYour worry is that if you bomb up the Great Hall in front of any other professor except Dumbledore you wonât get a ball?â
âSee, now youâre getting it-â
âWhat makes you think you will get a ball?â
James stopped walking, put his hands on each side of his waist in disappointment, and frowned.
âNow, youâre just repeating Moony.â
You glanced at Remus, who was staring at you with blank and tired eyes. This boy really needed to sleep, but that was another dayâs problem. Your eyes lingered a bit longer on his attire before returning to James; tawny jumper with black lines and ivory trousers under a pastel orange trench coat.
âRare moment of your Moony using his common sense,â you shrugged. âYou know youâll get a huge detention, right?â
âWhat else is new?â James smirked. âAre you gonna help us?â
The prospect of a ball during Christmas did entertain you. Fancy dresses and music, all while carousing with your friends was something no teenager would reject. And you knew if things wouldnât go as planned, Marauders wouldnât acknowledge your involvement; that was an agreement between the four boys even Remus had honoured. So you agreed to help them.
They made you regret it a few moments later in the Gryffindor common room.
âIâm not working with Remus.â you shook your head intently, wearing a displeased expression.
âOh come on! Why not?â James pleaded. âYou two are the best at Charms! You just need to figure out how to charm the fireworks to act how we want them to. Pete will get them and hide them, while Pads and I will handle transforming them into letters.â
âBecause last time we worked on something together, it blew right in our faces.â you point at Remus with your hand. âI got zero when I couldâve got the best point available.â
âWasnât the potion perfect? Professor gave you a zero because you wouldnât stop bickering,â Peter said. âIt was very distracting.â
You cringed at the memory. Your hard work had held no value only for a little (or not so little) quarrel with your partner. The only nice outcome was that they rarely partnered you two together anymore.
Remus was slouched on the couch, legs apart with one hand placed on his thigh, while the other held a book. He lowered his book to look at your discontented face.
âIâm not happy about it either, yet you donât see me whinging.â
You winced at him in aversion.
âIâd rather not see you at all.â
âYouâd miss me,â he tilted his head, wearing a feigned smile.
James clapped his hands to prevent another incoming tiff.
âAlright, you two will start your research when you see fit and keep us updated. Donât drag it out until November though, itâs a bit of a complicated matter.â
By the time a month had passed, you had figured that irritation was like a bunch of thorns piercing through your skin thanks to Remus. You had also learned that you can murder someone by spoon, but why would anyone bother themselves with shoving the spoon down Remusâs throat?
Therefore, you had been sitting with Remus every week, halting yourself from stabbing him with your quill. He wasnât helping you out at all.
âStop hitting my arm,â you whisper-shouted once more. Was Remus Lupin thick-headed? He didnât look like it, so he probably just enjoyed getting a reaction out of you.
âWhat is your armâs business next to mine? Sit properly.â
âRemus, If you havenât noticed, youâre tallââ
âThank you.â
âI didnât mean it as a compliment, shut up,â your head snapped in his direction, facing his smug grin. âYouâre taking much more space than me.â
âWell, sorry for you.â
âYouâre distracting me from my studies.â
âYouâre doodling right now,â he pointed to the paper before you with his brows. âAnd miserably failing, if I may add.â
âNo, you may notââ
âIs that supposed to be a rabbit?â he inclined his head an inch more to the paper. You smelled his shampoo from his hair, crisp and woodsy and; the brown locks were so close you wanted to run your hand through them to see if they were real.
âThatâs clearly a cat.â
âWhy does your cat have two paws?â
âSheâs sitting!â
âYou really suck at this,â he propped his head back, offering you a pitiful look.
âOh, and youâre rocking?â
âTen points from Gryffindor, Miss Y/L/N,â you flinched at your name from McGonagall.
âBut professor, Lupinââ
âOne more distraction and I will make it twenty.â
You clenched your jaw shut and lowered your head, letting embarrassment swallow you whole as all Gryffindor students sent you scrutinising glares. Of course, you would be the unlucky one that would get picked by the professor, not Remus, who was provoking you in the first place.
So, until the end of the class, you kept your head low and zoned out with your doodles.
You drew a circle, but it was more like a sun in your mind. Or the moon. You didnât remember.
You drew ears for the moon, and it seemed like two triangles stuck to a circle, but you didnât mind that either.
You even took some notes of the lesson but then you scribbled something thatâs supposed to be a lamp or a cactus on them, so they werenât very readable in the end.
You only snapped out of it when the unusual noise rioted, signalling that the class was dismissed. You had spent an hour doing nothing; an amazing use of time.
Remus pushed a parchment on your art pieces, covering them. You didnât see what was scrawled on the parchment as Remusâs hand had blocked the ink.
âI do rock,â he said before heading out of the classroom.
You stared after him as he disappeared behind the door. You thought he would be in the library as you lifted the parchment.
It was a sketch of you from the side.
You took the red velvet cookie in your hand, examining it for any trace of poison. They seemed perfectly fine, delicious even. What was troubling you was that they were a treat from James. Thus, there was no way you could get good-looking, appetising, tasty cookies without a headache.
âHave you two started your research?â
That was it. You had a headache.
Therefore, you deserved the cookies. You took three of them in your hand and threw yourself next to Sirius. You turned to lock eyes with Remus, all while nibbling on your sweet.
You noticed him looking at you and then your hands and then...your lips? You immediately pushed the thought deep into your mind, not indulging it even a second. No, he was probably staring at the cookie next to your lips.
Unconsciously, you put the sweet down and arched a brow at him.
âNot yet,â he said without breaking eye contact with you.
You heard James groan and used it as an excuse to avert your eyes, but you could still feel his brown gaze set your body aflame. You couldnât quite figure out if it was his hatred or something else that you refused to voice that was burning through you. You didnât dwell on it.
âYouâre waiting for Christmas Eve to do it?â
âProngs is right, Pick a time and do your homework, lads,â Sirius agreed. âPete is done already.â
âItâs hard to mentally prepare yourself for Remus,â you said, mouth half full.
âDonât talk your mouth full, itâs disgusting.â
âYou havenât seen yourself eating, have you?â
âHere we go again,â James complained. âJust go to the bloody library and find the spells, will ya?â
Remus stood up, and strode up next to you, towering over you. You stared at him like he was a crazy person, which he was in your opinion.
âLetâs go,â he said.
âNow?â
âYes, you have things to do?â
You didnât have things to do. In fact, your only to-do list for today was eating red velvet cookies. Thatâs why you didnât know why you were hesitant to go and be alone with Remus. You didnât know why your heart started to pick a race, either.
âIâmâŠâ You looked around, seeking an excuse that you knew didnât exist. âEating cookies?â
Remus grabbed the cookie jar. âYouâll eat them on our way to the library.â
All four boys were looking at you expectantly, so you hopped on your feet. You didnât bother to take the jar from Remus.
âDonât sulk, Y/N, itâs for the greater good!â You heard Sirius call after you.
You exited the common room, went down the stairs and hastened to the library. You didnât look back for Remus; you knew he was there. You could feel his presence.
You didnât question how he had managed to get the cookie jar in when you entered the library and he placed it on a table. You simply turned to the books, chasing their titles with your finger.
âWhat are we exactly looking for?â
âSomething that will charm the fireworks to act how we want,â Remus mumbled, too focused on the book titles. You noticed him examining the shelves that you had passed because of your height. It both irritated and tingled you the way he effortlessly could reach the top shelves.
âAnd how do we want them to act?â
âFly around in order, not the way they fly around usually.â
You hummed and didnât engage in anything more. Taking a cookie from the jar, you started reading and digging into all sorts of books.
How to charm your brush to comb your hair?
Not the one you've been looking for but sounded nice, you should look it up some other time.
Charms to take revenge on the ones that wronged you.
Would Remus get suspicious if you picked that one? You should look that one up too, next time.
Charms for cheating in the exam.
Why did a school shelter a book like this?
Charms for celebrations.
You smiled, looking up at the red-covered book. If there was a celebration, then there certainly would be fireworks.
You stretched out your hand to take the book, but your fingers only brushed its spine.
You climbed on your tiptoes, trying again. This time you could feel the engraved title letters on the spine. But other than that, to no avail.
A heft and warmth, that didnât belong to you, stroke your body. Your skin reacted faster than you did. You felt the surge of an unfamiliar heat and shivers under your skin, unable to fathom the hand on your hand.
You turned your head back, almost bumping it into Remus's chin. He wasn't looking at you, but you could see his clenched jaw and stiffened shoulders. The close proximity was suffocating, or maybe your breath had hitched. Either way, you held your breath.
Remus grabbed the red book, stepped back and started skimming it.
"You're starting,â he said.
It took you longer than usual to react to him.
"I found the book first," you said after recovering from the sudden and uncharacteristic surge of heat. You hoped your face wasn't flustered.
"Why didn't you take it first then?"
He was mocking your height difference, and it didnât annoy you this time. It did, however, make you conscious of your heartâs rhythm.
"I was close. You interrupted me."
Remus looked up from the book, a teasing smile gleaming on his lips.
"The only thing you were close to was hitting your head on the shelf."
You frown, being absolutely free of his previous effect on you. You snatched the book out of his hand and sat behind the table. You didn't raise your head when Remus stood in front of you and over your head, with his arms placed on the table.
You focused on the ink, forgetting Remusâs suffocating presence. Thatâs why you didnât want to be left alone with him.
After a few minutes and lines or pages, your eyes twinkled with mischief. Two pages of instruction on different ways of charming fireworks.
"Found it."
The easy part was done.
You let Remus take the book from you. He read the page with a wrinkle between his brows and nodded after finishing it.
âWeâll have to start practising it soon.â
âHave some pity, I exceeded my weekly tolerance of you, today,â you murmured. âI canât spend any more time with you.â
âAnd what made you think that I enjoyed our time together?â Remus stepped a bit back and leaned into a shelf.
You parted your lips and then closed them again. Time had gone rather unproblematic with Remus today, and ended without a headache. It was almost...boring.
âYou never even once did something to annoy me.â
His lips curved, eyes gleaming in amusement.
âDo you want me to annoy you?â
You hated the teasing in his tone. Something between confusion and disclosure hit you in the gut, goosebumps rose in your arm as a response to your fluttering heart.
âWhat? No, why would Iââ
âDo you enjoy bickering with me, Y/N?â
âI donât!"
âYou sure? Sometimes it sounds like youâre picking fights with me on purpose.â
âYou flatter yourself, Lupin,â you laughed, a bit awkwardly. He was smiling now, one step away from smirking. You noticed you rarely saw him smile this big around you. It was beautiful.
âJust like you said, I wasnât the one annoying you today. You started it.â
You felt the temperature rise in your body, embracing you without your consent. You didnât appreciate the way he threw the accusations at you or the way his eyes wrinkled adorably when he beamed.
âYouâre not the only one hating the other.â
Your lips uttered the words but you didnât hear yourself. You were too busy to stare at his changing expressions. His smile ebbed a little, but not enough to wipe the soft wrinkles around his eyes. He walked up to you, excruciatingly slow, looming over you. You watched his eyes rambling between your eyes, and even travelling to your lips, too. Your eyes, however, stayed only on the brown orbs, sorting out every layer, every colour, every blemish one by one.
âI donât hate you,â you heard him drawl.
Before you could take in what he murmured, his face changed into something else. You fathomed it from the twitch in his jaw and his faltering blinks.
âYouâre just annoying,â he said as if recovering his tone.
He stepped back, eyes lingering on your lips for one more second before turning away. You bit down your lips as you watched him exit the library.
âI brought candles,â you announced, tossing the candles to the wooden floor. They made an uncomfortably loud thud on the ground, causing you to grimace in displeasure.
âYes, please make sure to break all of them. Donât leave one unharmed,â you rolled your eyes at Remusâs cynical voice in the other corner of the Requirement Room.
You two have been visiting there to learn the charm of the fireworks every week. For two weeks, you had been working with the sticks and had mastered them. Thus, it was time to finally alter the sticks with candles, something that resembled a firework according to Sirius. They didnât want to work on fireworks, it would be a waste for James.
âTheyâre fine. Donât be dramatic,â you said to him as he walked up to you, glancing at the candles on the floor.
You felt him squat down, grabbing a white candle. He showed you a crack on it that wasnât there before.
âIt was there before.â
âYeah, sure,â he grinned. âWhatâs with the colours?â
You shrugged. Why choose only white candles when you could have red and yellow and purple and pink also?
âDonât mind the colours. Letâs start.â
Remus lit a candle as you took out your wand. He placed it on a chair, and stepped back, waiting for you to cast the spell.
When you first muttered the incantation, nothing happened.
You tried again, this time more fiercely both in your spelling and movements.
Nothing happened, The candle was sitting on the chair, mocking you with its flame. You were sure Remus was also repeating the same internally.
âYouâre too hesitant to bend your wrist,â he said.
You didnât hear any teasing in his voice but still cringed in embarrassment.
âYou wonât put out the candle if you bend your wrist a bit hard, Y/N. Stop hesitating,â he said again.
You tried once more, despite the sweat forming on your temple from anxiety.
With sticks, it was easy. Say the spell, bend the wrist and aim the wand.
With candles, you were afraid you would mess it up somehow; maybe put out the fire or even start a bigger fire. It was a fire, after all, it was dangerous.
When you failed again, Remus made his way to you, standing only a step away behind you.
You felt his breath behind your neck as he closed that one step, laying his body onto yours. You didnât manage to ask him what he was doing, you didnât need to. Your heart dropped when he put his hand on yours, lifting it in the air. He aimed it towards the candle, but you were too out of it to apprehend.
Your whole body was focused on his skin on yours, savouring his touch on you without your permission. Suddenly, you didnât think the sweat was from anxiety. You didnât think your heartbeats were from embarrassment. You didnât think your whole body was aflame because you were conscious of your ineptness.
You knew what it was. You knew what it was that set fires in the core of your chest, grasped the air from your lungs, and took the strength in your muscles away.
But you didnât acknowledge it.
You let Remus move your arm, copying the instructions. You let him brush your hand with his fingers. You let him show you how to bend your wrist all while his hand on yours. You let him whisper the incantation in your ear.
You felt the void around your fingers when he withdrew his hand and his body from yours.
âGo on,â he said, so low you wouldnât hear him if you werenât holding your breath.
You aimed the wand, bent your wrist, and cast the spell.
The candle rose to the air, attracting a few candles to itself and lighting them up.
âAttagirl. My turn."
You said nothing as you stepped away, letting Remus place himself in front of the chair. You lighted another candle for him and put it on the chair.
You watched him take a stance and aim his wand. You didnât know if it was because of his stance or his long legs or arms, but he lookedâŠhandsome.
He looked handsome with his serious expression; wrinkled brows, clenched jaw, stiff shoulders and narrowed eyes.
Heck, he looked handsome with his smiling expression too; curled-up pink lips, brown locks decorating his forehead, chestnut eyes glistening as his smile.
You cursed yourself at your admission.
He cast the spell, succeeding with the first attempt. The side of his lip inched up with pride for a tiny second.
You did it. You were ready for the plan. The only thing left was James and Siriusâs work.
He turned his eyes to yours.
âWe did it.â
âYes,â you nodded and got to collect the candles.
Remus frowned, visibly uncomfortable at something.
âWhatâs wrong?â he asked.
âWhat?â
You refused to glance at him. You didnât want to admit anything else just because his ridiculous gorgeousness affected you.
âSomethingâs wrong. Youâre acting weird.â
âHow am I acting weird? Iâm just cleaning up the mess so we can go and eat.â
âYeah, but,â he started helping you out by gathering the unused candles, âYouâre a bitââ
âI didnât know you cared about me,â you snapped your head in his direction.
He stopped whatever he was doing. You saw him swallow.
âI donât.â
âGood.â
You almost threw your candles at him.
âIâm going to dinner.â
You didnât wait for him. As you exited the room, you reminded yourself that he thought of you as annoying.
âStop panicking.â
âIâm not panicking!â You wiped your palms on your cloak, counting to ten to calm your nervousness.
âYeah, sure, thatâs why your breath is unsteady.â
âWhy are you even focused on my breath?â
You frowned when Remus didnât reply.
It was a big day. In the end, you'll either end up dreaming about your ball dress or worrying about the detention.
James and Sirius were in the Great Hall, hidden under the Invisibility Cloak. They were waiting for your charmed fireworks as you and Remus were waiting for Peter to bring them behind the gate.
Everyone was busy eating their dinner, like a casual evening. Chatters and clatters were mingling in the air, serving you an opportunity for secrecy.
Remus was standing next to youâa bit close, as your arms were glued together. His eyes were on the corner where James and Sirius were, as your eyes should be looking for Peter.
Except that you weren't looking for Peter.
No matter how much you wanted to prevent it, your eyes were drawn to Remus.
For the last fifteen days, it had been this way. You would look for Remus in every corner, and your heart would chirp like a bird when you would find him. You would start agitating him so maybe he would react, and wouldnât back down when he would annoy you first.
Even now, you couldnât help but steal secret peeks at him. Sharp jawline and unblemished face despite the scars were completed with downy hair and hazel eyes.
He was stunning and you were attracted to him. Your five-years-ago self would roll her eyes at you if she was to see you. You were attracted to him despite his annoyance with you, and your pride hated you for that.
You were sure if Remus knew your newly emerging feeling for him, he would mock you to the point you cried.
You turned your head away from Remus when you heard heavy step voices. Peter was bringing a box full of fireworks, trying to be as discreet as possible in the meantime. You stepped up and helped him. He nodded at you before entering the Great Hall like a starved boy whose only intention was to have dinner.
You pulled Remusâs sleeve and he turned to you. You heard him mumble ârightâ under his breath before taking out his wand. You repeated the same, waiting for him to sort out the fireworks.
âWeâll do it at the same time, remember. Or James wonât be able to Accio all of them at once.â
You nodded, aiming your wand all while alerting your senses to Remusâs voice. Between all the noise from the Great Hall, he had to raise his tone from whispers.
âOne. Two. Three.â
Both of you cast the spell. You made sure to bend your wrist this time. Two of the fireworks lit up and attracted other fireworks to themselves. Remus sent James the signal.
Seconds passed, but the fireworks werenât Accioâd anywhere.
You waited a bit more, glancing at Remus to see him do the same with a frown.
Another few seconds passed.
Nothing.
It was getting dangerous. You couldnât be near them. They were about to blow up.
You squirmed close to the wall, adrenalin filling up your veins and piercing your heart. Remus was sending the signal over and over again but to no avail.
You wanted to run but your legs were glued to the ground, not even managing to help your standing let alone running. You winced as the firework got close to blowing by a second.
One more second and it was going to explode right in your faces.
One.
You felt Remusâs body on yours, pushing you hard to the wall, almost squeezing you with his torso. His arms held your sides as you leaned into him, clenching your eyes shut.
You waited for the big hit.
But it never came.
Remus raised his head from yours, checking around.
Fireworks werenât there.
Just when you moved to get away from Remusâs hold, blaring cracks emerged in the air. You let out a scream, thinking it came from near you. Remus squeezed your arms, snapping his head to you.
âBloody hell, Y/N, my ears just bled.â
You looked around frantically, still standing between Remus and the wall. Your eyes averted back to Remus when you saw the real firework art was going on in the Great Hall. The fireworks were forming letters.
Chatters had turned into cheers, screams of excitement and joy echoing in your ears. You felt the colours of the fireworks on the walls, halls, your clothes and Remusâs body.
Remusâs body, which was too close to yours.
âSorry,â you uttered, gazing into the depth of his brown.
âYou alright?â he asked low, not letting you out of his grasp.
âYeah, yeah,â you nodded. âYou?â
âIâm alright.â
âGood.â
âGood,â he drawled, repeating to you.
His hands around your biceps were now burning up your skin. He was supposed to let you go now. Let you go and put a distance between your bodies.
Your heart cried at the thought of space. You begged and hoped and prayed that he wouldnât loosen his grip.
You started counting seconds. He didnât let go.
His stare at you darkened, breathing getting heavier by the second.
Your eyes lowered to his lips. They looked both soft and chapped. He parted his lips.
You looked back into his eyes. They were piercing through you, welcoming thoughts in your head that you so desperately shunned. You felt his touch on your skin tighten.
You yearned for his touch not only on your arm but every inch of your body.
You reminded yourself that he was annoyed by you.
You didnât blink. You didnât inhale. You didnât exhale.
You put your hands on his face and crashed your lips onto his.
The butterflies inside you resonated with the fireworks inside the Great Hall. Your heart quivered at the feeling of his lips on yours. Your chest flamed up in lust, your body smiled when you felt Remusâs hands wander to your back.
He kissed you back, welcoming the passion to run free in your veins.
You arched your back just to have him closer. You felt his slips stretch into a smirk, his fingers digging into your skin.
You kissed him harder.
His heavy breaths mingled with yours, hovering over your face. Your whole body shivered under his silky lips, sheltering the heat of your chest under his touch. His hands covered every inch of your body, learning it by heart. The heft of your lust drowned under the intensity of his manoeuvres.
Your heads were up in the clouds, unaware of anything going down around you.
You forgot where you were. You forgot what you were doing. You forgot why you were doing what you were doing. The dark in your eyes leaked shadows in your mind, blackening every thought.
That is until three boys intervened.
You pushed Remus away, putting the distance you so despised between you two. You pushed your lips together in an attempt to hide their red and swollen state. You ignored the cry of your lips, body, heart and soul for Remusâs caress.
âWE DID IT! WEâRE GOING TO CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS WITH A BALL!â
You grinned at James and let the boys have their celebration. You didnât cast a glance at Remus. You didnât see him not taking his eyes off of yours for even a second.
It was Friday. The last Transfiguration class before the well-deserved ball.
You were seated behind your desk, definitely not waiting for Remus.
You two hadnât talked about the kiss since it happened. Hell, you hadnât even talked to each other properly.
You might be ignoring him a little bit.
You were leaving the room when he was entering, going to sleep when he was approaching you, and being busy when he was trying to talk to you.
You might be ignoring him not so little bit.
Your leg was bouncing up and down, and you were fighting with your urge to not check the door every ten seconds. You hadn't quite figured out how you were feeling, but you knew it was something intense that your hands were freezing not because of the winter but because of the nervousness.
The same nervousness that made your mouth run dry when you saw Remus enter the classroom. The same nervousness that made you breathe quicker and feel dizzy when you felt Remus sit down next to you. The same nervousness that turned yanked the colours out of your face when you heard him talk.
âWill you run again if I open my mouth?â
âYou just did,â you say, trying to sound as casual as you could. You werenât facing him just the way he wasnât facing you.
âAnd you didnât run.â
âI didnât.â
âGood,â he nodded. âYouâve been ignoring me.â
âNo?â
His head snapped at you, forcing you to turn to him as well.
âDonât mock me, Y/N,â he warned, irritated.
âIâm not mocking you, Remus. Iâm justââ
âWhat did I do wrong?â he cut you off. âTell me.â
Your heart skipped a bit at his question, clenching around a pain that you wished to ignore.
âYou didnât do anything wrong.â
âI donât understand,â he frowned. â You kissed me. So, Iâm guessing you wanted it.â
You didnât reply, too busy reliving the whimsical moment that had been keeping you awake at night, attacking your heart with butterflies.
âYou did want it, right?â
âYes,â you snapped back to the moment. âYes, I did.â
âThen tell me what I did wrong and maybe I can rectify it,â he said. âTell me what I did that youâre ignoring me.â
You didnât know what to tell him.
You couldnât tell him that you were running from him because you were too embarrassed to look him in the eye and admit that you were attracted to him. You couldnât tell him that you were still figuring out what you were feeling, too afraid to get your heart broken.
You couldnât tell him that despite your fears and doubts, you were still yearning for the sound of his laugh and craving the touch of his skin on your skin. You couldnât tell him that there wasn't a moment in which your mind could offer you any other thought than him.
So you told him the first thing that came to your mind.
âYou didnât do anything wrong. It was me. I shouldnât have kissed you.â
Remus looked appalled, eyebrows furrowing.
âWhat?â
âIt was a mistake.â
âA mistake?â
âYes.â
He laughed bitterly, shaking his head.
âWe both know it wasnât a mistake. Stop lying to yourself.â
âI-I just donât think itâs a good idea for us toââ
âIâm not asking you to marry me.â
âI know!â you said, losing your temper for a second. âI know, Remus. Iâm just not sure about...well, everything.â
You watched him inhale deeply, contemplating something in his mind. You wished to know what was going on in his head but didnât ask.
âWe can, uh,â he started, âWe can try to be friends.â
âFriends?â
âYeah, until we figure out whatever this is.â
You stared into his eyes, they werenât pleased. Like they were keeping something back. You didnât know how to ask him that, so you didnât
âFriends,â you repeated as if testing the word. âI guess it can work.â
Remus nodded and stretched out his hand to you. You stared at his hand for a moment, recalling the way they caressed your skin a few days ago. You ached for that feeling.
âAnytime before I graduate would be nice,â he said.
You muttered a quick âsorryâ before shaking his hand.
Geoffrey Fawley had asked you to be his date for the ball.
He was a nice boy from what you had heard from James. He was in the Quidditch team with James and was a good chaser. Of course, you hadnât mentioned either James or Sirius about your date. You wanted them to be surprised so you could mock them later on.
You hadnât mentioned Remus about it, either. Why should you? Right?
It was only two days since you had agreed to be friends and in those two days you barely even talked, mainly because you were too busy choosing a dress for the ball.
To your delight, you had found the perfect one.
Checking your attire with one last glance, you turned your heels and walked out of the dorm room straight to the hall.
Geoffrey was waiting for you with a smile; he was an undeniably charming boy, you had to admit. Blonde hair sparkling above the green eyes with a graceful frame, he could steal any girl's heart.
Except that yours was already stolen by a pair of brown eyes.
You pushed Remus's visage deep in your mind, refusing to revive your disappointment when he didn't ask you out to the ball as his date.
You let Geoffrey take your hand and curtly lead you from the door to the ball.
"You look absolutely gorgeous."
"Thank you," you smiled.
As you two occupied yourself with small talk, you didnât notice James and Sirius making their way to you. You had learned that Geoffrey has two elder sisters, he doesnât like chocolate and he unsurprisingly loves Quidditch. He was kind, sensible, and a great listener.
He was everything and nothing you ever wanted. He wasnât Remus.
âFawley! Y/N is your date?!â James called, smiling from ear to ear as he approached you.
âYes, Potter. Apparently, she deemed me worthy of standing by her side tonight,â Geoffrey joked back, smiling at you gently.
âAh, yes, fancy words,â Sirius dropped his arm around your shoulders. âHave you kissed yet? Her lipstick looks intact.â
âSirius!â you hit him in the torso.
âIâll take this as a no and head out to Remus,â Sirius said, âHeâs been a moody bitch these days.â
âWhereâs he?â you asked, forcing your tone to the casual.
James turned back, pointing at someone with his hand.
âThere. The one with the sour face and brown hair.â
He had leaned against a wall, looking around with a frown. He was captivating in a black suit, his hair falling into all the right places and creating an art-like view. You enjoyed the view a few moments more, memorising every little detail about his figure. You wished he could be a bit closer to you.
âHe doesnât look like he enjoys himself. Should we invite him?â Geoffrey asked.
âI donât think thatâs necessary. He looks comfortableââ
âNonsense, Y/N,â Sirius cut in. âOi! Moony! Come here!â
You squeezed your lips together as Remus reached you. He was without a date.
Would it be malicious if you felt relieved by that?
âYou guys have fun. Lily is waiting for me,â James said before leaving you four together.
âHe is with Lily?â you asked Sirius, both surprised and happy.
âGeoffrey must have really swept you off your feet,â Remus drawled, staring into your eyes.
You felt uncomfortable. Not because of Remusâs words but because of Geoffreyâs presence. You smiled at Remus awkwardly, knowing you had Geoffreyâs eyes on you.
âYou donât have a date, Remus?â
âNo,â he said to you. You felt cold at his tone.
âOh, Iâm sure youâll find someone here.â
âI donât want to find someone.â
You felt Geoffrey grab your hand.
âWould you like to dance?â
You smiled and nodded at him, letting him carry you to the dance floor.
He put his hand on your waist as you placed your hand on his shoulder. He intertwined your other hands together and started moving with the rhythm.
You glanced at his eyes only for a moment before dragging them to every corner of the room. They landed on Remus.
His eyes cut through your chest like a dagger, reminding you of every feeling your skin, heart and soul had felt two days ago.
You hated that you felt nothing if it wasnât Remus touching you. You hated that you felt nothing if it wasnât Remus smiling at you. You hated that you felt nothing if it wasnât Remusâs words that were whispered in your ear.
âYou seem distracted.â
âOh,â you locked eyes with Geoffrey again, smiling. âForgive me.â
âItâs Lupin, isnât it?â
âExcuse me?â
âYou have been acting weird since he stopped by.â
Your smile ebbed as guilt prickled inside of your chest. Geoffrey chuckled at your fortified expression.
âItâs alright, you know. I knew you had no feelings for me when I asked you. I just didnât think you may have feelings for another.â
You lowered your head to his chest. There was no point in denying it.
âIâm so sorry Geoffrey, truly. I didnât mean to disrespect youââ
âYou havenâtâ
âOr offend you.â
âYou havenât either,â he shook his head in a warm smile.
âI shouldnât have said yes,â you mumbled before looking up at him.
âIâm glad that you did. I wouldnât be able to move on if I didnât hear you reject me.â
You admired his genuinity, and his pleasant smile and his gentle manner.
You adored his kindness and good heart. He was the kind of boy that would never annoy you, bicker with you or hurt your feelings.
But he wasnât the kind of a boy that would make your heart race in excitement, passion and desire.
He wasnât Remus.
When the dance ended, you couldnât find Remus.
âGo,â Geoffrey said, âIâll be alright. Itâs obvious that you two need to talk.â
You thanked him before placing a short peck on the cheek. Then, you dashed to Sirius, who was too busy getting drunk.
âPadfoot, whereâs Remus?â you yelled, attempting to drown the music.
âWhereâs who?â
âRemus! Whereâs Remus?!â
âIâm here,â you startled at his voice behind you.
You parted your lips to speak to him but he acted faster.
âCome with me,â he said, holding your hand and dragging you away from the people.
He led you to another room and closed the door after him.
âA bit quiet.â
You nodded, feeling the blood in your veins rush. It had only been a second since you were alone with him and your feelings were already messed up.
An awkward silence filled the room.
âRemus, I donât want toââ
âYou didnât tell me youââ
You sighed, hoping that he would talk first. And he did.
âYou didnât tell me you had a date.â
Your heart skipped a beat.
âI didnât know I had to.â
âI thought we wereâŠfriends,â his teasing tone daunted your nerves. You forgot what you were searching Remus for.
âWeâre not that close friends.â
âYou seemed pretty close with Geoffrey.â
Pride clawed at your insides, taking an internal scream from you. It didnât hurt, you felt powerful.
âJealous much?â you managed to hide the smirk but you didnât hide the smug tone. You saw Remus clench his jaw and clear his throat before talking.
âWhat if I am?â
âThen Iâd ask you the reason,â you said. Your smug tone changed into something different, something desirous.
âDonât tire yourself, love. Iâm not jealous.â
âNice,â you smiled, stepping forward. âThen you wouldnât mind if I returned to my date.â
Remus filled the void between you and the door with his body, not letting you go through. You peeked at his lips momentarily.
âWeâre not done talking.â
You hoped you could cover your jitters with cheekiness because your heart was racing, your mouth was dry and your hands were trembling with anticipation. You didnât even want to mention the surges of fire and flood inside you exhausting each other.
âOh, isnât this new? You finally want to talk to me after years of vexation.â
âThatâs what friends do, right?â he shrugged.
The way that âfriendâ word agitated you was ridiculous.
âIâm all ears,â you told him, still not backing away from him, holding onto the distance that could easily be conquered with one step.
You were finally close enough to him to easily feel him under your touch. You could see the beauty marks, freckles and scars vividly. You wouldnât even need to get closer to caress them. You only needed to raise your hand andâ
âI fancy you.â
Your eyes shot up from his lips to his eyes, widening in bemusement. You chose not to let your ears deceive you, not to let the words plant hope in you, not to let butterflies escape their cage.
âWhat?â
âYou heard me,â he frowned. âIâve been fancying you since you were a little girl and I was a little boy.â
âYou hated me when you were a little boy and I was a little girl.â
You shook your head. He did the same.
âNo, I didnât. Annoying you was the only way to get you to talk to me, so I clung to it for years.â
You felt the heft weighing you down drag you onto the surface, letting you finally breathe. You felt the fireworks inside you, or maybe that was just butterflies. Your heart chirped in its cage, ready for you to set it free.
âI fancy you, too.â
You set your heart free from its cage. You let him fly away, welcoming the warmth that the boy before you had to offer.
Remus straightened and closed the distance between you two.
âYou do?â
âYes,â you whispered. âI do.â
You closed your eyes, giving into the night when you felt Remusâs hand on your cheek. You drew a breath in when you felt his other hand on your waist. You parted your lips when you felt his hot breath on your lips.
Anticipation climbed its way from your stomach all the way to your heart, shaking your breath. One more inch closer and you would die in his lips, one more second later and you would break down under his touch, one more breath in and you would crumble into pieces by his kiss.
âWould you like to see how I ruin a friendship in a second?â
âYes,â you pleaded.
He closed the one last inch, spent the one last second and inhaled the one last breath.
He kissed your lips.
You died in his lips, broke down under his touch and crumbled into pieces by his kiss.
His lips, so soft and silky, intoxicated your mind. His touch, so gentle yet so firm, ignited your skin. His skin under your hands, so warm and flawless, blazed your fingertips.
You melted under him, ready to die in his arms.
He kissed your lips until they were red and swollen. He kissed you until you were breathless and dizzy. He touched you until he sent shivers down your spine.
When you pulled away, his eyes dark and in trance were still on your lips, his lips placing pecks on all over your face.
You smiled into his lips, letting him embrace you.
âJames owes Sirius ten sickles.â
âWhat?â you laughed, taking in his scent.
âTwo years ago they had a bet on us,â he said, and you loved the way âusâ echoed between his lips. âSirius said sooner or later we would get together."
âWe just made Sirius ten sickles richer.â
I love that I can write Remus both as a kind, gentle, sweet boy and as a mysterious, complicated but hot boy. It just makes sense in both ways.
Anyways, if you've read this far, thank you so much for your time. And thank you to the person that sent the request.
Please let me know what you think!
and if you loved this fic or my writing, buy me a coffee <33
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Scars To Your Beautiful - James Potter
A/N: I have no idea how I was able to finish this xD thank you @captainlunaxmen for all your help! I hope yo loves like this :)
Request - @nix-rose asked: What about a James Potter x Black!Reader (if reader can have some personality: extrovert, loyal, gryffindor but could probably be a slytherin, just a happy person, definitely rough and tumble but still enjoys looking cute-) âHave you⊠Always been this beautiful?â ââŠThatâs so cheesy even for your standards.â
Warnings: reader is really insecure, mentions of abusive parents, James protecting you from a creep (nothing to explicit though) also, this isn't proofread :D
Disclaimer: I donât own Harry Potter :) gif isnât mine :DÂ Â
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Scars To Your Beautiful
But there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
And you don't have to change a thing,
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
The âother Blackâ. That's how you were known in Hogwarts.Â
You knew your family wasnât perfect. As much as they all like to make it seem that way, it was very much far from it. Being part of The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black brought a lot of pressure with it, but you were used to it by now. And, deep down, you loved your family. At least your brothers and your cousins. Well, two of your cousins, you were always pretty terrified of Bellatrix after she enchanted all of hers and her sistersâ ancient creepy dolls to come alive and it still terrified you to your very core today. But you loved Andromeda and Narcissa, even if the latter was now spending all of her time with Lucius Malfoy and you saw less and less of her.Â
Even if youâd never admit it, you were always a bit envious of them. Not in a bad way, you just⊠wondered a little how it would feel to be like them. You remembered guys literally fighting to get your cousinsâ attention. And not a day went by without you having to hear at least ten different people saying how gorgeous your brothers were.Â
And then, there was you. You had a respectable reputation since you were part of the Black family. But it sometimes felt like you werenât worthy enough to be part of it. Youâve sometimes noticed some guys staring at you a bit too long. And youâve gone out with a few guys before. But youâve also had people come to you specifically to get closer to one of your relatives. And nobody had referred to you as beautiful. Well, no one, exceptâŠ
âHey, beautifulâ you heard that very familiar voice standing next to you.Â
âPotterâ you smirked.Â
âGoing to the match today?âÂ
âThe Slytherin-Gryffindor match?â you smiled. âOh, I wouldnât miss it for the worldâ you told him.Â
âGood, cause I need my good luck charmâ he said as the two of you walked to the Great Hall.Â
âExactly, how does that work, Potter? Because Iâm not really rooting for your teamâ you reminded him and he scoffed, pretending to be offended.Â
âBut of course you are, your brother plays on my team-â
âMy other brother plays for my teamâ you interrupted.Â
âWell, maybe not the team but⊠Iâm sure you like the Gryffindor captain more than Slytherinâsâ he smiled sweetly at you.Â
âWell, you got me there, Potterâ you admitted.Â
âPromise youâll come to the party when we win?â he asked as you entered the Great Hall and you knew you would separate.Â
âThatâs a lot of talk, Potterâ you smirked but he offered his pinky to you. You rolled your eyes but you took it. âNever speak of thisâ you told him.
âSee you there, beautifulâ he said before he saw you walk to your table.Â
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
âHereâ you said, sitting down next to your brother at Potions and handing him a small bag.Â
âWhatâs this?â he asked, grabbing the bag.Â
âThat girl from Ravenclaw wanted me to give you this. I think she wants to ask you to Hogsmeade next weekendâ you said, grabbing one of the chocolates inside. âBite this, if it doesnât have a love potion, Iâm stealing themâ you said.
âIâm not trying anything!â he complained. âRemember when we had to take care of Sirius after that girl from Hufflepuff basically drugged him?â
âI know, thatâs why I wanted you to try them firstâ you chuckled.Â
âHold onâ he said, grabbing his wand and pointing it at the candy. âWeâre goodâ he said when a small purple dust came out of it. You grabbed one of the chocolates and Regulus grabbed another one, reading the note inside. âSo, how was your talk with Potter this morning?âÂ
âI didn't talk to Potter this morningâ you frowned, stealing some of his chocolates.Â
âDonât do that. Iâm not Siriusâ Regulus glared at you. âIâm not oblivious of how you two just casually entered the Great Hall togetherâ he said.Â
âI donât know what youâre talking about, Reggieâ you said, pretending to be confused.Â
âOr whenever he goes to Honeydukes he just happens to buy one too many Peppermint Toads so he gives you some, which just so happens to be your favoriteâ he said.
âHe doesnât⊠do thatâ you said, with your mouth half full of chocolate.Â
âAre you⊠playing dumb? Or have you actually not noticed this?â
âNotice what? James is just friendly. Thatâs how he isâ you tried to explain.Â
âReally? Heâs never gotten me Sugar Quillsâ Regulus said.Â
âHe doesnât like Sugar Quills, why would he buy those?âÂ
âHe doesnât like Peppermint Toads eitherâ he smirked.Â
âY-yes he does!â you argued, nervously.Â
âNo, he likes Chocolate Frogs, like the rest of us normal peopleâ he said, as you glared at him. âAnd besides, itâs not just that. Heâs always asking Sirius and me what your favorite books are, or asking Remus which songs you likedâ he shrugged.Â
âHe⊠he does?â
âDoes he really strike you as the guy who would read Pride and Prejudice for the fun of it?âÂ
âHe mightâ you tried to convince yourself as you grabbed another chocolate.Â
âLook, I know what youâre doing, and I know why youâre doing it. And itâs not worth it, bugâ he said, getting serious.Â
âItâs easy for you to say, Regâ you mumbled, picking another chocolate. âLook, itâs just⊠not that easy for meâ you added.Â
âYouâve gone out with guys beforeâ he frowned, confused.Â
âNot like Jamesâ you added. âWhat if⊠what if heâs really just being friendly? What if I think heâs interested in me and then I make a complete fool of myself? Just because heâs nice to me and I think there might be something else there? I feelâŠâ you sighed, looking down at your hands. âIt feels patheticâ you mumbled.Â
âFirst of all, thereâs nothing wrong with you liking James. Having feelings doesnât make you patheticâ he said in a serious tone. âSecondly, did you not listen to what I just said? I honestly donât think that James is just nice to you randomly like heâs nice to everyone else. Heâs always looking for excuses to be around you, and he seems happier when he is. As do you. And, to be honest, I thought you were as oblivious about this as Sirius is, but now that I know that you were just trying to live in denial well, youâre dumber than Sirius- OUCH!â
âExcuse me?!â you asked, offended.Â
âOnly when it comes to thisâ he defended himself. âLook, I know that⊠for some reason, youâve convinced yourself that youâre never going to find someone who fancies you-â
âFor some reason? There is a very clear reason, Regulus, her name is Walburga!âÂ
âI knowâ he rolled his eyes. He knew very well about the hierarchy of the three of you in your home. And even if you were still not as below as Sirius because you were in Slytherin, your mother never let you forget that you were not Regulus or any of your cousins for that matter. âAnd I know that is not easy for you to turn off her voice in your head but, if you donât, you might miss your chance to be with someone who is actually a great fit for you and it looks like he really likes youâ he explained. âDonât do that. If you let her win, youâre admitting that sheâs right. And we all know, sheâs notâ he reminded you. âWhatâs the worst that could happen if you give Potter a chance?âÂ
âItâs very annoying when youâre right all the time, did you know that?â
âI doâ he smiled triumphally, eating one last piece of chocolate as Professor Slughorn finally entered the class.Â
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
âUgh, what is it?â you heard your cousinâs annoyed voice on the other side of the door that you knocked on before it opened, and she appeared. âOh, hey, loveâ she smiled when she saw it was you.
âHi, Cissa, um⊠is this a bad time?â you asked, hoping you were not just interrupting her having sex with Malfoy.Â
âOh, no, love. Lucius is just moping about losing the matchâ she laughed, stepping out. âWhatâs up?âÂ
âUm, w-well, I wanted to ask for a favor⊠if youâre not too busyâ you smiled.Â
âPlease, anything to get away from Luciusâ she said, linking her arm with yours and already walking over to your dorm. âSo, whatâs going on?â she said, stepping into your dorm and noticing all the clothes scattered around your bed and the floor.Â
âWell, I was hoping to get your opinion on somethingâ you said, smiling sweetly.Â
âLet me guessâ she said, sitting on your bed and grabbing a few skirts and dresses. âYouâre going to the Gryffindor party to see James Potterâ she said, erasing the smile off your face.Â
âWha-? How did you know? Did Regulus tell you?â
âOh, please, love, Iâm sure you and Sirius are the only ones who didnât knowâ she laughed.Â
âWhat?â
âYeah, Bella and Andy also knowâ she informed you.Â
âWhat? How?â
âI told themâ she shrugged.Â
âUgh, greatâ you said, throwing yourself on your bed. âMy entire family is discussing my pathetic crushâ you lamented.Â
âIt could be worseâ she said. âAt least heâs a purebloodâ she smiled.Â
âRightâ you said awkardly, sitting up. Of course that would be the only pro sheâd find on James.Â
âBesides, he obviously likes you backâ she said as she started looking through the dresses. âStand upâ she said, pulling you up and putting the dress in front of you.Â
âHow are you so sure that he likes me back?â
âOh, please, love. You canât be that denseâ she snorted. âThe boy wonât leave you alone. And Iâm pretty sure youâre the only one not from Gryffindor to get invited to their partiesâ she said. âOr at least the only Slytherinâ she said.Â
âW-well, maybe Sirius invited me-â
âThen why isnât Regulus going?âÂ
âOkay, fairâ you sighed.Â
âThis looks pretty. How come you havenât worn it before?â she asked, holding up a black dress.Â
âOh, I got it a while ago in a very cute shop, but, I know itâs not something my mother would ever let me wearâ you told her.Â
âWell, lucky for us, your mum isnât hereâ she said, throwing the dress at you.Â
After you put it on, Narcissa happily sat back down on your bed and helped you with your makeup.Â
âHey, Cissa?â
âTry not to move, Iâm doing your eyesâ she said.Â
âHow do you um⊠get a guy to uh⊠notice you?â you asked, making your cousinâs look soften a little.Â
âJames Potter already notices you, loveâ she smiled.Â
âW-well, yeah, I guess b-but, um⊠how do I let him know that I like him?â you asked. âYou know, without actually telling himâ you chuckled.Â
âYou mean, how do you flirt with him?âÂ
âItâs just⊠Regulus insists that he does these things to get my attention and⊠to be honest, I didnât think it was any different from the way he acts with other girls so⊠I guess I have been acting normal, but⊠Iâd like him to know that Iâm interested, I guessâŠâ
âWell, Potter seems to have a big ego, so congratulate him on how well he played todayâ she said as she kept doing her makeup and you glared at her a little.Â
âAnd Lucius is as humble as they come, I supposeâ you muttered.Â
âFair pointâ she said, before she continued. âLook, you already know heâs interested in you. Just smile at him, laugh at his stupid jokes, you should be fineâ she insisted as she finished. âOkay, Iâm doneâ she smiled. You got up and walked over looking at yourself in the mirror.Â
For the first time, in a very long time, you actually felt beautiful. Narcissa had managed to make you look as elegant and flawless as you did whenever your family had a dinner party, but you didnât feel like you were wearing a costume in one of the dresses your mother always picked. You felt like yourself. You turned around and hugged your cousin tightly.Â
âThank you so much, Cissa!â you smiled.Â
âYouâre welcome, love. Now go flirt with your dumb boyâ she said, ushering you outside your dorm.Â
âYou tooâ you said, smiling and walking down the stairs as she rolled her eyes.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
When you entered the Gryffindor Tower, the party was already in full mode. You felt a few people, guys specifically, looking your way but you thought maybe it was because you were possibly the only Slytherin here. You walked across the Common Room, looking for James, but you found a different Marauder first.Â
âHi, Remusâ you smiled as he walked over to you.Â
âOh, thank Merlin youâre hereâ he hugged you. âYouâre the only person I like at this party and now Prongs can finally stop moping about you not being hereâ he said, making you laugh a little as he pulled away and looked at you. âWow⊠you look-?â
âBad?â you panicked.
âWhat? No! You look lovelyâ he smiled. âProngsâ probably gonna have a heart attack thoughâ he smirked.Â
âShut up! Stop saying things like that!â you widened your eyes at him.Â
âOh, please donât tell me that you are as oblivious as your brotherâ he chuckled.
âI am not-! You know, I hit Regulus for saying that today!âÂ
âAlright, donât hit meâ he said, putting his hands up in surrender. âBut, you cannot tell me that you havenât noticed the way Prongs acts around you. He was literally throwing a fit about you not coming todayâ he insisted.Â
âReally? Because he seems fine to meâ you said, pointing behind Remus where you saw James talking to a group of very pretty girls as he offered a drink to one of them while another one threw her hair back, clearly flirting with him.Â
âThat means nothingâ Remus said, rolling his eyes when he looked back to you. âThatâs how James is-âÂ
âExactly, thatâs how James isâ you repeated.Â
âNo, itâs different with youâ Remus insisted as he grabbed a drink and handed it to you.Â
âReally? Enlighten meâ you glared at him.Â
âSo, you are admitting you are as oblivious as Sirius then?âÂ
âYou know, youâre making a big deal out of that for someone who is just as oblivious on my brotherâs crush on him-â
âWhat?!â Remus said, choking on his drink and pulling you aside. âAlright, now youâre just making stuff upâ he said.Â
âIâm not! You really havenât noticed how Sirius is obnoxiously loud whenever youâre around to get your attention?â
âHe⊠does notâ Remus said, blushing a little.Â
âOr that he calls you sweet namesâ you smirked.
âHe calls everyone âloveââ he interrupted.Â
âYes, he doesâ you nodded. âBut he only calls you âmyâ loveâ you added.Â
âHe⊠does notâ he repeated.
âWhat are you doing here?â Sirius asked, walking over to the two of you all of the sudden.Â
âNothingâ Remus quickly said.Â
âBeing normal, why?â you said at the same time, making Sirius raise an eyebrow at the two of you. âUm⊠h-have you seen James?âÂ
âNo, but I am seeing too much of somethingâ he said, gesturing his hand at your body. âWhat the bloody hell are you wearing?â
âA dress?â you said, looking down at yourself.Â
âThat is too revealing. You need to go change!â
âFirst of all, it is not. And secondly, your shirt is literally completely open!â you complained.Â
âYeah, well, this isnât anything they havenât seen beforeâ he defended himself. âI am not in the mood to fight some prick that stares at you for a little too long because of⊠thatâ he said. âGo upstairs and grab my jacketâ he told you.
âWhat? No!â you complained.
âYesâ he insisted. âWould you reason with her, my love?â he asked, looking at Sirius and you smirked when he blushed furiously.Â
âShut upâ he whispered to you. âLook, just go upstairs and pretend to look for a jacket, Iâll distract him and you can come back in a few minutesâ he said while Sirius finished his drink.Â
âUgh, fineâ you rolled your eyes.Â
âHow come she only listens to you?â Sirius complained, pouting at Remus. âIt must be your beautiful eyesâ he smiled.
âHow many of those have you had?â Remus asked, taking his glass away from him.Â
You made it upstairs to the boysâ dorm and went over to Sirius' trunk to look for one of his jackets. You found one that you kind of liked and put it on before you went back downstairs. You looked for James but saw he was still talking to the group of girls. You tried to look for your brother instead but saw him very busy with Remus and you didnât want to interrupt so you went to grab something to drink.
âI didnât know they let Slytherins into our partiesâ you heard Augustus McLaggen on your left, pouring himself a drink as well.Â
âOhâ you said nervously. You were rarely alone at these things. You would at least have Regulus by your side and he would make someone go away if you were uncomfortable. âW-well, James invited me and- I was with my brother-â
âRelax, darling, Iâm jokingâ he smirked, walking closer to you.Â
âOhâ you smiled wearily.Â
âItâs actually a bit⊠refreshing to have someone from another houseâ he said.Â
âUm⊠thanks?â
âThereâs something different about youâ he said, eyeing you up and down. âI canât quite put my finger on itâ he said, making you pull your jacket a little closer.
âHey! You finally came, loveâ you thankfully heard Jamesâ voice coming towards you and wrapping his arm around your waist. âI thought you were standing me upâ he said, kissing your head.Â
âJ-James, hiâ you smiled relieved.Â
âSorry, mate, gotta steal her for a bitâ he said, smirking at McLaggen who was glaring at him and he quickly pulled you aside.Â
âThank youâ you told him as the two of you walked away.
âDonât mention it, love. McLaggenâs a prick, why were you talking to him?â
âI wasnât talking to him! He was talking to meâ you insisted as James raised his eyebrow. âI was just getting a drink! And I was gonna go look for you-â
âAre you wearing my jacket?â he asked, confused.Â
âY-your⊠what?â you said, looking down at your jacket. âThis is y-your jacket?â you asked confused.Â
âYeahâ he smiled.
âOh, Iâm sorry, it was in Siriusâ trunkâ you said, confused. âI thought-â
âYeah, beautiful. Iâm gonna save you some time, probably none of our clothes is in the correct trunkâ he laughed. âExcept Remusââ he added.Â
âIâm sorryâ you said, starting to take it off.Â
âN-no! Donât worry about it, gorgeous. Are you cold? Is that why you wanted my jacket? âCause it looks good on you- I mean, you look beautiful tonightâ he said smiling at you. âW-well, you always doâ he added.Â
âR-really?â you smiled, feeling your cheeks blush.
âYeahâ he nodded. âYou donât need the jacket if you ask me-â
âOh, um, w-wellâŠâ you stuttered. âSirius just⊠didnât like my dress and said I needed a jacketâ you rolled your eyes. Â
âWell, Padfoot just needs to snog Moony and mind his businessâ he laughed, making you laugh as well. âYou look beautiful with that dressâ he smiled dreamily at you.Â
âThank you, Jamesâ you said, feeling your heart flutter. âWait, you know about that?â
âHow Sirius calls Moony âmyâ love? Of course I doâ he chuckled. âSo, what took you so long to come? Were you crying all this time because your house lost?â
âReally? Did you want me to come just to brag about the match, Potter? I can still leaveâ you smirked as he handed you a drink.Â
âPlease donât. I was so bored before you cameâ he said, walking you over to one of the sofas near a window.Â
âI find that very hard to believeâ you said, looking around.Â
âWhy do you always think Iâm lying?â James asked, placing his hand on the sofa, behind you.Â
âBecause Iâve known you since Iâm eleven?â you replied, making him glare at you a little.Â
âThat hurts, loveâ he said, trying to sound offended. âWhen have I ever lied to you?âÂ
âWell, for starters, you didnât tell me that you, my brother, and Peter became Animagi to help Remus-â
âThat was your brother. He didnât let us tell youâ he defended himself.Â
âAlrightâ you said, trying to suppress your smile. âSo, youâve never lied to me?â
âNever, loveâ he insisted.
âNot even to avoid hurting my feelings?â you raised your eyebrow at him and noticed him tense a little.Â
âN-no, of course notâ he said, taking a sip of his drink.Â
âSo, last Christmas when you invited us over and your mum was teaching me how to cook, you actually liked the Christmas Pudding I made?âÂ
âOf course I didâ he chuckled.Â
âJamesâ you glared at him.Â
âYes, love?â he smiled, goofily at you.Â
âI mistakenly added salt instead of sugar, it was ruinedâ you laughed.Â
âNo, no. It wasnât ruined. It gave it a new better tasteâ he shrugged.Â
âJames!â you laughed.Â
âWhat? Itâs true! I liked itâ he insisted.Â
âNobody else ate it! You canât possibly think it was goodâ you laughed.Â
âWell, I didâ he shrugged, turning your way.Â
âYouâre really stubborn, did you know that?âÂ
âOh, and youâre not?â he laughed making you smile. âHave you⊠always been this beautiful?âÂ
âThatâs so cheesy, Potter, even for your standardsâ you chuckled, feeling your cheeks burning.Â
âWait⊠do you-? Do you not believe me?â he asked, his tone getting serious.Â
âI- um⊠I doâ you said, unconvincingly.Â
âYou donâtâ he said, turning himself to you. âIt is one thing that you donât believe that I liked your Christmas Pudding-â
âYou didn'tâ you insisted.Â
âBut how can you not believe me about that?âÂ
âI do!â you insisted. âItâs just⊠Iâm sorry, Iâm being stupidâ you smiled sadly, looking at your drink.Â
âNo, youâre notâ James insisted, placing his hand under your chin to make you look at him. âWhatâs going on, love? Did- did I say something wrong?âÂ
âNo!â you quickly said. âYou never say anything wrongâ you smiled sadly. âItâs just⊠Iâm not really used to um⊠hearing thatâ you said, feeling your cheeks blush.Â
âLove, I tell you that every single day! Why is it so hard for you to believe me?âÂ
âBecause, James, look at my entire familyâ you said, sadly. âYou know who I live with. My mother is not warm and loving like your mum is. I grew up very differently than youâ you reminded him, making his look turn soft and his heart break a little. âI know you wouldnât lie to meâ you added. âItâs just⊠not easy for me to believe it, I guessâ you smiled sadly.Â
âWell, loveâ he said, moving closer to you and placing his hand softly on your cheek. âIf youâre okay with it, I will keep saying it until you believe meâ he told you. âBecause you are the most beautiful person that I have seen in my life. And, since apparently I havenât been as obvious as I thought I was, I am completely and madly in love with you and I would love to take you out on a dateâ he said, making your heart stop.Â
âR-really?â you asked and he raised his eyebrows at you. âI m-mean, y-yes, I would love to go on a date with youâ you smiled. âAnd⊠in case you didnât know because Iâm horrible at this⊠I am very much in love with you tooâ you added, making the biggest smile appear on Jamesâ face. âAnd I also think youâre really beautifulâ you said before he pulled you in to kiss you on the lips.Â
âI love you, beautifulâ he said, making you smile.Â
âI love you too, Jamieâ you said. âCan I ask you one more thing?â
âAnythingâ he said.
âDo you like Peppermint Toads?â you asked suddenly, remembering your conversation with Regulus.Â
âDo I uh-â he frowned. âWhy are you asking me that?â he chuckled nervously.Â
âYou always give me Peppermint Toads when you say you bought too many but⊠I donât think Iâve seen you have oneâ you explained.Â
âWell, love⊠I hate to break it to you, but nobody likes Peppermint Toadsâ he admitted.Â
âThatâs not true!â
âYes, it isâ he said, kissing your cheek. âI just bought them because you always smiled when I gave them to youâ he said. âSo, Iâll buy you as many as you wantâ he said, hugging you to him and giving you another peck on the lips.Â
"Thanks, love" you smiled. "Can you now tell me if you actually liked my Christmas Pudding?"
"I did!"
The End
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
A/N: I hope you loves liked it! :)
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Truth or Dare J.P. x Fem!Reader
Warnings: swearing, mentions of lame dares, mention of James getting a bloody nose, anxiety, Sirius Black
Word Count: 3.5k
Pairing: young!James Potter x Fem!Reader
Summary: You kept your secret crush on James, well, a secret. From everyone but Sirius that is. That was a big mistake as now heâs forcing everyone to play truth or dare. Not to mention everyone has taken some truth potion too
A/N: the song James sings is âI Will Surviveâ by Gloria Gaynor
Masterlist Taglist
The smirk on Siriusâs face was the only evidence you needed to know this was a horrible idea. There was a certain way his mouth would move when he came up with an idea that would end in some sort of disaster. Despite learning what this smirk looked like, you were never able to predict it before it happened. Usually, you noticed it much too late. Currently Sirius was smirking at you and you could practically see the gears working in his brain.
The afterparty the Gryffindor team had thrown to celebrate winning the Quidditch cup was finally winding down and you were sprawled out on the couch; the sound of conversations and the rain hitting the windows could have lulled you to sleep if it wasnât for James. Your feet were resting on Siriusâs lap while your head was in Jamesâs. His thumb was absentmindedly stroking your cheek as he carried on a conversation with Remus; the action sent butterflies to wreak havoc on your insides.
Sirius, who had only been watching the scene play out for a while, pinched your leg to get your attention. It was that action that caused you to look at him and see the terrifying smirk on his face. Months ago you made the mistake of confessing to Sirius about your crush on James. You hadnât really meant to tell him since you thought you were just confessing to Remus but Sirius was the one who came in the empty classroom. You started spewing your feelings without looking to see exactly who came in. At least it wasnât James.
But ever since then, Sirius made it a point to try and find a way to get you to admit your feelings for James to the man himself. You had him swear not to tell anyone, especially James and so far heâs followed his promise. Of course, you can never expect Sirius to keep his mouth shut for long.
âEveryone!â Sirius yelled and stood, shoving your feet off of him. âItâs time to play a little game of truth or dare, with a twist. Remus, itâs time.â
Remus abruptly ended the conversation with James and sprinted up the stairs to his dorm. As he came back down, he had a small vial in his hands and smirk that could almost rival Sirius on his face. He knew. After telling Sirius about your crush on James, you didnât dare tell anyone else. It was bad enough that the biggest gossip in Hogwarts knew, no one else could know either. Except of course, Sirius told Remus; you were sure he told him because how else would he have known?
You werenât sure if Peter or Lily knew but they soon proved they did when they also smirked at you. Did everyone but James know? You turned your head to risk looking at the boy that captured your heart but luckily he looked confused. You were safe, for now.
âWhat do you have Moons?â James asked, patting your arm a little before he helped you sit up.
âYeah Moony, whatâs in the vial?â Peter asked, nudging Lily with his elbow.
Remus looked you in the eye with a shit-eating grin. âJust a little potion Lily and I whipped up today.â He paused, no doubt for dramatic affect. âVeritaserum, the most powerful truth serum in the magical world.â
Sirius wandered over to Remus and plucked the potion from his hand. âNow any of you babies who pick truth over dare, wonât get away with a lie.â
At this, you scrambled off the couch and moved over to Sirius. âWhat are you doing? Donât do this to me. Donât do this to Remus.â You hissed, grabbing his arm. âYou canât be serious.â
âNewsflash love, I am Sirius and Iâve given you plenty of chances to admit your feelings but you never did. Now, weâre forcing your hand. Get over it and play the game babes.â He patted your head much like you would do to a dog and gathered everyone to sit in a circle on the floor. You were sure that somewhere in his brain, Sirius was doing all of this to help. You never asked him to help but he wasnât the type to just sit back and wait for things to happen. In some way, he thought this was the best way to help you, or you hoped that was the case.
You took a seat on the floor between Lily and Peter. Despite them also knowing about your feelings for James, you hoped they would be kinder. Remus moved around the circle and placed a single drop of the potion in everyoneâs mouth. Once everyone, including himself had one, he sat down next to James who was across from you. âThis is a safe group for Moony. Everyone here already knows about his hairy little problem.â Sirius smiled and turned to Peter. âTime to test the potion. Pete, whatâs something you would never tell anyone?â
âI wet the bed until I was 10.â Peter answered quickly. Everyone was silent.
You patted his back and smiled. âDonât worry Wormtail. Itâs alright.â
Sirius nodded slowly before he cleared his throat. âAnyway, letâs start with James. Truth or dare?â
âDare of course.â James rolled his eyes and leaned back on his elbows. He looked so cocky with the smirk on his face but he sure looked good.
âLovely. I dare you to serenade Moony. Pick whatever song youâd like.â
James jumped to his feet immediately. âAt first I was afraid, I was petrified. Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side.â He dropped to his knees and began crawling toward Remus who was looking anywhere but at James. âBut then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong and I grew strong. And I learned how to get along!â He crawled into his lap and grabbed his face in his hands, forcing his friend to watch him. He mumbled for a while, making up the words he didnât know until he got to the chorus. âDid you think Iâd crumble? Did you think Iâd lay down and die? Oh, no not I! I will survive!â
âAlright, thatâs enough.â Remus groaned and shoved James off his lap. He adjusted his glasses and crawled back to his seat.
âPersonally,â he said as he sat down, âI think that was my best performance yet.â James sent you a wink and the butterflies were back with a vengeance. âAnd I think you should go next Moony.â
âNo matter what I pick Iâm sure Iâll be embarrassed so, truth I suppose.â Remus sighed and rubbed his face. He was certainly having regrets about playing this game.
âWhen was the most inappropriate time you farted?â James asked through the giggles that overtook him. The rest of the group laughed along with him but you were too busy smiling to laugh. James had the cutest and sweetest laugh you ever heard. It reminded you of pure joy and you were sure if you could find a way to bottle it up and sell it, you'd be a billionaire.
âIn History of Magic two weeks ago. Binns gave us a test and it slipped out. I blamed it on James and everyone believed me.â
James pouted and stopped laughing while everyone else only laughed harder.
---
The night continued with silly questions and dares and surprisingly, many of them were not directed at you. Either everyone had forgotten their plan to make you confess your feelings or it hadnât happened yet. Just when you thought you were going to get out of this with your dignity still intact, Sirius turned to you. âAlright Y/N. Iâm giving you the option here. Truth or dare?â
You didnât know which one to pick. If you chose truth you were sure Sirius would force you to just admit your feelings. Dare had its own risks too. Sirius had made Lily and Peter switch tops (he actually looked quite cute in the crop top), Moony had to drop his pants and moon the group, and poor James had to try and do a backflip; his nose had just stopped bleeding. There was no winning. âTruth.â Sirius had that wild smirk back on his face. âNo! I choose dare. I meant to say dare!â
âToo late. If you had to marry someone in the group, who would you pick and why?â
That actually wasnât too bad. âJames. Heâs sweet and funny and he can always make me smile. Heâs also pretty handsome too.â Perhaps you would have lied if you could have but with the way James was smiling at you, you were glad you had to tell the truth.
âJames, since you won Y/Nâs hand in marriage, she can do the honors of giving you your truth or dare.â Sirius patted James on the back and winked at him. That had to have been some sort of secret message between them.
âWell then, I choose truth as well.â
It would be easy to ask him if he liked you or if he liked anyone. He would have no choice but to tell the truth and then you would know. If he did like you, maybe things could change and you would tell him the truth too. Of course if he didnât, your heart may never recover. You had been friends with Lily before you were friends with the marauders. Every time James would flirt with Lily or even talk to her, your heart would flutter. He eventually stopped bothering her and they became friends which meant you also became his friend. It had been a couple of years now and the friendship with James was easy. He was so caring and he always took the time to check on you and make you laugh. He was easy to fall in love with.
âWhat was the last lie that you told?â
James hummed as he tried to remember, a blush coating his cheeks. âI think it must have been when I told Sirius I didnât have a crush on anyone.â
So he did like someone! That someone could even be you. You couldnât help getting your hopes up as you watched him rub the back of his neck and look at the ground. Sirius looked at you and smiled, actually smiled; he must have been thinking the same thing as you. âProngs, is your crush here?â
James nodded.
âThen I vote you have to kiss them!â Sirius proposed and everyone cheered.
James paled and shook his head. âI canât do that. Everyone will know and if they donât like me then everyone else will see it happen.â He looked as terrified as you felt.
âHow about,â Remus said and quieted the group, âwe all close our eyes so we donât see who he kisses. Sound alright to you Jamie?â
He shrugged and everyone closed their eyes, including you. Once darkness fell, so did the silence. No one moved or made a sound until across the way you could hear James shuffling. The sound of his movements got louder and you assumed, and hoped, he was moving toward you. Then, all of a sudden, the shuffling stopped. Could he have stopped in front of Lily? Could he have stopped in front of Peter? Your heart was pounding in your chest and you were sure the rest of the group, possibly even all of Hogwarts, could hear it thumping. What if he didnât kiss you? Would you be able to continue on with the friendship knowing there was no possible chance it could blossom into something more? You wanted to believe you could but it was hard enough to look at that messy hair and his sweet hazel eyes and his perfectly pink lips without knowing his feelings. How could you ever look at him again if you knew he felt nothing more for you than friendship?Â
What if he did kiss you? Would you kiss him back or would you be too shocked? What if he kissed you and you forgot how to kiss? What if you sucked at kissing and it made him change his mind? What if it was magical and everything you dreamed it would be and you started dating and then eventually you broke up? Would it ruin the friendship? Was it worth the risk of losing him to even try and get him in the first place? You were never going to confess to him.
Your heart was beating faster and faster and all the air in your lungs escaped you. Your head was spinning and your thoughts were racing. Was the room always this hot or was it just you? Why was it still so quiet? Did something happen and you missed it? Had James kissed someone else and told everyone to open their eyes and you were sitting there with your eyes closed like an idiot? It was too much.
Your eyes flew open and you jumped back; James was right in front of your face with worry written all over his. His eyebrows furrowed and he grabbed your hand, steadying it. You didnât even know you were shaking. âHey, are you alright?â
You stared at him with wide eyes and glanced around him. Everyone else had opened their eyes and they were now watching you both. The air shot back in your lungs and your chest heaved as you tried to get your breathing under control. James continued to watch you, waiting for some kind of answer. When you didnât have one for him, he grabbed your hand and helped pull you to your feet. âLetâs go to my dorm and get some air.â He started to lead you to the stairs but turned to look at the group one last time. âWeâll be back down in a bit. Just, stay here and give us some time?â
He put a hand on the small of your back to help guide you up the stairs. Once you were in the dorm, he grabbed your hand and pulled you over to his bed, helping you sit. âStay right there.â He whispered before rushing around the room and throwing open all of the windows. The fresh air coming in did help calm your breathing. Your mind was still racing but as James sat next to you and you listened to the sound of the rain outside, your thoughts began to slow.
James slowly wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close to his side. âWhat happened?â He whispered. âI was crawling around and I could hear you breathing all heavy. Then you started shaking and I was going to check on you and then you kinda scared the shit out of me and opened your eyes.â
A small smile appeared on your face as you laid your head on his shoulder. James really could always make you smile. The smile didnât stay long as you began speaking. âI was scared you were going to kiss someone else but I was scared you were going to kiss me. I started overthinking everything and I just got nervous.â The words flew out of your mouth before you could even think about what you were saying.
âWhy were you scared?â James whispered and you could feel his body tense next to you.
âBecause Iâm in love with you.â Holy shit. Why did you say that? âI didnât want you to kiss anyone else because I would never be able to look at you the same if I knew you thought of me as just a friend. But I was scared you were going to kiss me because then things would change and if something ever went wrong, I couldnât live without you.â You just poured out your deepest secret about James to James. What were you doing? You decided to never tell James about your crush so why did you say it? You scanned the room, hoping that maybe there would be some answer and there was. Laid out on one of the beds was Remusâs favorite sweater. Remus.
The veritaserum! It was still working and it just made you spill your guts to James. You shoved yourself away from him and covered your mouth with your hands. James watched you with wide eyes but neither one of you moved.
Your chest was rising and falling rapidly as you watched him as well. What could you possibly say to make this better? âIâm so sorry. I didnât want to tell you because I was so worried that it would ruin our friendship but that stupid potion really does work well and I couldnât help myself. I want to say Iâll be fine if you donât like me but I probably wonât be alright. I love you so much James but if you donât love me in any sort of romantic way then Iâll have to live with it. Just please, donât hate me; donât leave me.â
James swallowed thickly and pushed his glasses further up his face. His cheeks were bright red and his bottom lip was pulled between his teeth. âDo you really love me?â
âOf course I do.â You dropped your hands from your mouth. You didnât have to continue as you already answered his question truthfully but the damage was done. There wasnât any more harm you could do if you told him why. âYouâre the most amazing guy I know. Youâre funny even when I lie and tell you I hate your jokes. You can make me smile no matter what kind of day Iâm having. You make me feel special and loved and when I talk you give me your full attention. You remember my favorite book and my favorite food and you always remember my birthday. Youâre perfect James. How could I not love you?â
His eyes traced over your body a few times before they stopped on your face. The way he was looking at you, the intensity of it all, made you want nothing more than to shy away. But you couldnât. You had to see this through to whatever end. âDo you⊠do you love me too?â You whispered, unsure if he could even hear you.
âI do. I love you Y/N.â Time stopped as he spoke. You werenât even sure if you were breathing anymore. Could this be a dream? It was only fitting that the man of your dreams confessing his love for you would happen in a dream. Gingerly, James reached out and took your hand. He was warm and a little sweaty; James always got sweaty hands when he was nervous. His palm was heavy on top of yours and as he scooted closer to you, you decided that if this was a dream, you didnât want to wake up anytime soon.
He stopped moving when his face was just centimeters away from yours. âCan I kiss you?â This close you could see the deep browns and brilliant greens in his eyes. You could smell the cologne he put on after each quidditch match.
âPlease.â That was all it took. He leaned forward and planted his lips on yours, softly at first but soon he leaned in further. His arms wrapped around your torso as your hands threaded through his hair. Your lips moved together in perfect harmony and you could no longer tell where you began and he ended. Desperate for more, you climbed onto his lap and your noses bumped.
âOw shit.â James quickly pulled back and covered his nose with his hand. In the moment you had forgotten all about his poor nose.
âIâm so sorry James.â You whispered but soon started to laugh. Nothing was exactly funny but something about the whole situation was hilarious. James joined in your laughter and shook his head. As the giggles died down, he rested his forehead on yours.
âI should probably see Madam Pomfrey about my nose in the morning. I did hit the ground pretty hard.â James smiled and pecked your lips.
âWhat happens now?â You whispered, tucking some hair behind his ear.
âBesides finding some ice for my nose?â
âYes,â you laughed. âBesides that.â
James hummed and rested his hands on your hips. âHow about after my nose gets fixed Iâll take you on a date? We can go to the Three Broomsticks and take a walk. Maybe get some candy?â
âIâd like that a lot.â
âSplendid.â He mumbled and leaned in again, attaching his lips to yours. The dormitory door swung open and you quickly pulled away from him. Sirius stood in the doorway and as he took in the sight of you on his best friendâs lap and James still leaned in for a kiss, he smirked that same wicked smirk.
âWell, pardon me.â He winked at James and turned around, shutting the door behind him. You could still hear him yell, âMoony! Wormtail! Weâre sleeping on the couch tonight boys! Prongs finally got the girl!â
Taglist (if your name is crossed out I can't tag you)
@100gaysnails @weasleybuns @steelthistle @jsjcue @andy200700
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âThe war is over, itâs been over for a year.â
Warnings: Mentions of war, sadness
Pairing: Harry Potter x Reader
Words: 1.1k
Summary: Harry visits his first love at St. Mungoâs Hospital
After the war, it was expected that the Wizarding World would be in shambles. Harryâs friends, his family all separated to grieve in their own personal way. He, in fact, didnât see Hermione for the longest time after the war neither did he see the Weasley family very often. He understood. Living through the war was almost as bad as dying from it. The memories stick to your teeth and implant themselves into your bones so youâre forced to relive it every time you close your eyes. But, week after week and month after month, the Wizarding World seemed to heal by individual stitches. Harry saw Hermione and Ron more often, debating on whether or not to return to school, and he was squished in a large hug from Mrs. Weasley. He even traveled and saw Luna who had been living in a small cottage in the woods. But, you. It was you he had seen the most, every Sunday of every week at St. Mungos.
You were, by all definition, Harryâs first love, perhaps even only love. Next to him, side by side, you faced the difficulties that Harry had seen throughout his years at Hogwarts. However, during the war, something happened. No one was quite sure what took place to make you lose sanity, but Harry didnât care. You were still the girl he loved, still, the girl he had faith in.Â
Harry tousled his hair and held the bouquet of flowers in his grip. He entered St. Mungos which was quieter than usual and greeted the nurse at the front.
âHere for Y/N?â she asked,
âHow is she today?â Harry replied, looking around the halls.
âSheâs how she usually is, though I suppose today she is a bit tired. Go on then,â she directed Harry.
As Harry approached your hospital room, he took a deep breath. It killed him to see you like this. Why couldnât he have stopped you from fighting? Why didnât he tell you to stay home? Guilt bit at him. But, instead of delaying, he knocked on the door.
âCome in,â your sweet voice rang. Harry turned the doorknob to see you, sitting perched on your bed. You were reading some sort of book with your legs crossed. âOh! Harry! I didnât know you were coming today.â
Harry paced in, feeling a smile on his lips. âWhy wouldnât I be here? I come every Sunday.â
Your eyes furrowed, âIs it Sunday already? Have you brought me flowers? You shouldnât have!â
âI always bring you flowers,â Harry reminded, moving towards the vase to throw out last weekâs flowers and placing the new ones in them.
âDo you?â you tried to remember, narrowing your eyes in concentration.
âYes,â he sat next to your bed, holding your hand in his.
âHow did you know I love Forget-Me-Nots?â
âI suppose I just had an inkling,â Harry replied brushing off the fact that you told him you love Forget-Me-Nots every time. âWhat are you reading?â
You flipped the book to show off the cover, âIâm reading Romeo and Juliet.â
Harry squinted in his glasses to see the book reading the title âLittle Women,â he frowned slightly before answering, âLast week you were reading Romeo and Juliet, youâre reading Little Women this week.â
You shook your head, âNo! This book is about four sisters and a lovely fellow named Laurie, andâŠâ you trailed off, âOh.â
Harry patted your hand, âNo worries, weâre all a little forgetful sometimes.â
âWhy are you here, Harry?â you asked, crossing your legs to face him.
âWhat do you mean?â
âIsnât the war starting? You should be out there finding the Horcruxes!âÂ
Harryâs heart froze. It was often that you were forgetful, but never in such a state.âY/N,â Harry said as softly as he could, âThe war is over, itâs been over for a year.â
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âNo, please. Donât say that. You love her, not me.â
Warnings: Drinking, alcohol
Pairing: James Potter x Reader
Words: 3.5k
Summary: Youâre in love with your childhood friend and it is painful to watch him pine over Lily Evans
Part Two âJames, youâre a right knob head sometimes. She loves you.â
Part Three âIâll say it every second of every day if need be, I love you.â
Before you could even count, before you even wore diapers, you and James Potter were best friends. He liked to brag that you two were destined to be together, two people tied together with golden string and fate had brought you together; as friends of course. Best friends. Friend. That word created a pit in your stomach that sucked all your emotions and left nothing but a taste of bile and heartbroken sadness that you forced yourself to swallow. It was incredibly hard being Jamesâ best friend. He was quite affectionate with his friends, a caring man he was. He tended to Remus on the lower days where his body seemed to ache, sat with and comforted Sirius in complete silence when he receives letters from home that spoke of nothing other than their disappointment and aided Peter in his quest to become a more confident, bright young boy. He was, by any definition, a good friend and had the tendency to wrap his arms over the shoulder of anyone who was closest and he was never shy to tell his friends âI love you.â Â
You werenât even quite sure when you had fallen in love with him, maybe you always were in love with him, nevertheless, you simply wiped the feeling off your shoulder and ignored the consistent thumps of your heart whenever he was around. However, as years passed from childhood into teenage years, it became increasingly more difficult. James had sprouted over the years, you barely even noticed until the two of you had hit platform nine and three quarters until you realized you had to purposefully look up to see his eyes. His hair became more tousled and his Quidditch practices left him with muscles that he so humbly bragged about. He was, arguably, quite handsome. So, yes, it was hard to be best friends with James Potter.
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âi will if you kiss me?â
james potter x fem!reader
2k words
description: James needs a tutor in Herbology and youâre the best at it.
"A tutor? Seriously Minnie?"
"Yes seriously, Mr. Potter. You're failing Herbology, and if you do not pass your exam next Friday, you'll have to be benched from the quidditch match that weekend."
James threw his head back and groaned, "Can Remus tutor me? Or Lily?"
The professor shakes her head, "No, Ms. Y/I/n will be your tutor as she is most proficient in the subject. You are to meet her in the library tomorrow at 4:00. Understood?"
"Yes ma'am" He states as he salutes her and turns to exit McGonagall's office.
-
Laughing, that's all Sirius has done since James returned to the dorms and told his fellow Marauders about his tutoring issue.
"I can't, I can't breathe, oh this is too good. Herbology?
You're failing Herbology?" Sirius huffs out in between his hysterical laughter whilst slumping against the shoulder of his werewolf boyfriend.
"Yes Padfoot, I'm failing Herbology and have to get tutoring from that Y/I/n girl.â James huffs as he flops onto his back on his bed.
"I've never even spoken to the girl, hell I don't think I've ever heard her speak in general." The bespectacled boy continues as he stares up at the red canopy above his bed.
"She's nice." Remus says casually.
"Funny too." Sirius adds on.
James shoots up in his bed to look at the couple.
"You guys know her?"
"Yeah, I study with her sometimes,â
"And I've met her when I'm bugging Remus while they study" Sirius smirks.
James groans and flops back down, his head filled with dread of the upcoming tutoring session.
-
You let out a groan after looking up from your watch.
It's 4:15, fifteen minutes past when James Potter was supposed to arrive for tutoring.
You decide to wait five more minutes and if he's not here then you're leaving.
Of course, five more minutes do pass and he hasn't arrived. So, you start to back up your textbooks, parchment, and other supplies.
"Hi, hey, sorry.. I'm late"
You look up to see one James Potter standing before you out of breath.
Did he run here?
He sits across from you and you roll your eyes slightly.
"Just don't be again, or you'll have to find someone else to help you."
He tilts his head to the side slightly and his eyebrows knit together in confusion.
If you weren't already annoyed, you would have found the sight to be adorable.
"I thought Minnie said there was no one else who could tutor me?"
"Exactly. You reply, your lips forming a tight sarcastic smile as you take your supplies back out to begin studying.
James eyes widen a bit in shock, his lips part slightly as well before they curl up into a smile.
Maybe this girl isn't that quiet.
-
A few hours have passed and the two students are quietly laughing amongst themselves as they pack up their books.
The pair head out of the library and walk until they reach a point where they have to go in separate directions.
James up towards the Gryffindor tower and you down into the cellars to reach the Hufflepuff dorms.
"Okay, I'll see you in the library on Thursday. At 4:00.
Do not be late or so help me James, I will-"
"Okay, okay, I got it, l'lI be there at 4:00. Promise." He says putting his hands up in mock surrender.
"Mhmm" You hum. "See you then James."
You turn and head down the stairs into the cellar but not without hearing James yell "Goodbye" down the stairwell at you.
-
You walk into the Great Hall with your friends shortly after bidding your goodbyes to James and depositing your bag in your dorm.
On your walk to the Hufflepuff table, you glance over at the Gryffindor table and end up catching the glasses-covered eyes of a certain boy who seems to have already been watching you.
James just smiles and waves, and you can almost swear you saw his cheeks turn a little pink when you returned the gesture.
"Okay, what was that?" Your friend Sarah asks as you take your seats at your house's table.
"What was what?" You ask in return while serving yourself some food.
"Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that, The James Potter just waved at you. And then blushed?!" Your other friend Beth exclaims.
âI'm tutoring him. We just had our first session before dinner. And he did not blush."
"I'm sorry? You're tutoring the guy you've been crushing on since third year and didn't tell us??" Sarah whisper-yells at you.
"First of all, shut up. Second of all I did not and do not have a crush on him. Just thought he was cute."
"Mhm, sure Y/n, sure." Beth drones sarcastically.
-
At 3:45 on Thursday afternoon, Sirius Black is almost 100% sure he is about to murder his best mate.
"James, if you don't sit the fuck down l'm going to shove your head into a blender." Sirius says exasperated.
"Merlin Pads, that's violent." James shudders and sits down on the end of his bed in lieu of the pacing he was doing previously.
"Oh c'mon Padfoot, he's just excited to see his tutor that he has a big fat crush on.â Peter teases without even looking up from the deck of cards he's messing with.
"Shut up, I don't have a crush on her. I just think she's nice, and funny.. and really pretty.â
"Godric, you are so gone" Remus laughs.
"Oh, whatever, piss off. I'm leaving now."
"It's only 3:50, aren't you supposed to meet at 4:00?" Peter questions his friend.
âYeah, but I was late last time so I want to be sure I'm not again." James hurries out before leaving the dorm to head to the library.
-
You walk into the library at 4:00 exactly to find James already sitting at the table with his notes out and reading his textbook.
"Hi James." You smile as you approach him and sit down across from him.
"Y/n! Hi!" James beams at you when he looks up at you from his book. "I'm not late this time." He says proudly.
"You are not" You smile and laugh softly at him and this time since you aren't annoyed you do acknowledge the thought that bounces around your head.
Merlin, he's cute.
-
A week later you find yourself in the library yet again with James for your final tutoring session before his exam tomorrow.
Over the last week you had both spent a good deal of time together even outside of your sessions.
James would find you in the halls between classes and claim that he had Herbology related questions but really it was just an excuse to walk you to class. And you knew that, he always asked almost the exact same question.
Or he and his friends would walk by where you were sitting outside reading and you would call his name and he would immediately bid goodbye to his friends to hangout with you for a while.
Sometimes you would just continue reading but out loud for him to listen as well, or sometimes he had a bunch of energy and would spend an hour rambling about whatever he happened to be excited about at the time.
You always listen thoroughly and James noticed and felt extremely happy as most people tune him out when he rambles.
He even apologized the first time he did it because he assumed he was annoying you. You immediately shut that idea down.
But right now when you're trying to make sure he knows everything that is going to be on his exam tomorrow and won't stop asking random questions you need him to stop.
"James."
He doesn't even seem to hear you and just keeps talking and flailing his hands around.
"James." You say again a little louder.
Still nothing.
Luckily during the last few sessions you have started sitting next to each other so you are able to act on the thought you have.
You reach up one of your hands and place it on James's jaw and turn his head to face you.
In doing this you also brought his face significantly closer to your own.
"James."
"Y/n."
James sounds a little breathless when he speaks and you watch as his eyes dart around your face for a while but they linger on your lips most often.
"James, you need to focus on the work, your exam is tomorrow.â
"Right." He sighs dreamily, still not fully paying attention to what you're saying.
"So will you focus on the work now?" You ask him softly, your own breathing beginning to become a bit heavier under his gaze.
He glances back down at your lips again before looking into your eyes and speaking.
"I will if you kiss me?"
You giggle at him and smile.
"Fine but you better focus after.â
With that you lean in and connect your lips in a gentle yet passionate kiss.
When you both pull away you're grinning at one another.
"I don't think I can ever focus on anything but that ever again." James smiles.
You wack his shoulder lightly and smile.
"James! Work, now!" You groan but even then you're still grinning.
"Okay, okay! Focusing now." He says as he turns back to the notes in front of him.
He wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you closer to him while you begin to explain what he needs to remember again.
-
It's Friday afternoon, classes have just ended and you are making your way through a crowded hall trying to get down to your common room when you hear someone shout your name behind you.
You turn around and are greeted by the wonderful sight of James running up to you.
Once he reaches you he bends over, placing his hands on his knees, in an attempt to catch his breath, so you pull him off to the side of the corridor so you're not in anyone's way.
"You good there James?" You smile and place your hand on his back gently.
"Yeah, yeah I'm good." He huffs as he stands back up to his full height.
"But..look! Look!" He says excitedly waving a piece of parchment in your face.
"James, love, you've got to stop waving it around if you want me to look.
James' hand immediately stops moving and his face flushes at the name.
You smile and grab the parchment from his hand and read over the title.
Final Herbology Exam.
And next to that was the number 95% in black ink.
"Oh my godric, James!" You exclaim and jump up to wrap your arms around his neck.
He quickly responds by wrapping his own arms around your waist and lifting you slightly off the ground.
"I'm so proud of you!" You excitedly but softly say into his ear.
"It's all thanks to you." He responds in the same tone as he sets your feet back on the ground but neither of you make any moves to release each other from your arms.
You move your head from the side of his to look at him and smile.
He quickly leans in and kisses you sweetly. When he pulls back he murmurs against your lips.
"Thank you for tutoring me."
You smile against him before responding.
"Of course, had to have the best player on Gryffindor on the pitch to make it all the sweeter when Hufflepuff wins."
He pulls his face back quickly and his eyes snap open to see the smirk stretching across your lips.
"How dare you!" He gasps dramatically before continuing to speak. "You have to support Gryffindor now." He finishes matter of factly.
"Now why would I do that? I'm in Hufflepuff.â
"Because, your boyfriend is the captain of the Gryffindor team."
"My boyfriend, huh?" You tease.
"I mean, if you'd want me to be?" He smiles sheepishly.
"Obviously I do, James." You smile before pressing your lips against his again before pulling back quickly again.
"But I'm still supporting Hufflepuff tomorrow."
"No.. love." He groans as you release yourself from his arms and start to walk away.
He follows after you like a lost puppy and continues begging you to support Gryffindor tomorrow.
Little does he know you intended to the whole time.
-
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Poor bunny
Remus Lupin and fem! marauder! reader
[Requested â see request here]
Summary: Y/n doesnât understand why her friends are lying to her every month, so on one full moon she follows themâŠ
Warnings: swearing, mentions of blood, gashes, scars, everything associated with werewolves and one attacking someone, quite graphic and sad but there is a lot of fluff in thrown in there to balence it out...maybe bring some tissues x
A/n:Â 5.4k words, reader is a marauder and a rabbit animagus, hence the name bugs (like bugs bunny), I really like this one, super proud of it, enjoy!
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You smiled looking at Remus concentrating on the other end of the room. You wondered if he knew how perfect and pretty he was, of course being his best friend for near 6 years you knew that wasnât true and it broke your heart every time you remembered it.Â
Sirius, James and Peter had gone to Hogsmeade to get some supplies as Remus was feeling a little tired, while you had stayed to keep him company, and by company you lay on Peters bed, since he had the softest covers, contemplating life while Remus read his book
Your gaze was broken as Sirius sat down on the bed next to you, shifting his legs to lean them all the wall besides yours
He taps your sock clad foot with his own âHey bugsâ he says a little tired, leaning his head on your shoulderÂ
You tap his foot back âHi Padsâ you reply leaning your head on his own
While Sirius and you engage in general conversation, James moves to sit by Remus and Peter goes to the bathroomÂ
Plopping himself down James nudges the boy âAlright moonyâ he says upbeat
Remus keeps his eyes on the book âHey Prongsâ he greets with a small smile, bumping him gently with his knee
âGot you some goodiesâ James pulls out a couple of chocolate bars, holding them up
That draws Remusâ attention away from the book âThank you Prongsâ he says placing down the book and accepting the chocolate, as he opens a bit up he lets his head fall into the Jamesâ shoulder
James wraps his arm around him placing a small kiss to his hair, he knew each moon effected his friend differently, but there was a pattern and this one had his friend exhausted and beyond sad. He had stayed up last night with Remus as he cried wishing that he didnât have to go through it once again and it killed James. He wished he could help more, take away the pain, even take it himself so Remus wouldnât have to suffer anymore, all of them didâŠand he also knew you would do the same if you knew
Like the other marauders you were an animagus, a wild rabbit, something the rest of the boyâs thought was rather adorable considering the âbig bad wolfâ was in love with you. You had found the mandrake leaves and questioned it, wondering if that was the plan for everyone to become one. After much, much convincing from the rest of the boys, Remus was swayed into letting you become one, but under one condition, you were never to know and never to come with. He argued your form was too fragile and too easily hurt by him, which was bullshit as Peter was smaller than you, but they ultimately agreed
James knew the real reason though, it was clear to everyone besides yourself, Remus was in love with you
âOh yeahâ Peter says as he comes back into the room âI got your favourite bugsâ he picks up a bag he had set by the door and moving to sit on the end of his bed
Your face lights up, bringing your feet off of the wall and twirling around to face him âOoo gimmieâ you make grabby hands at the boy, making him smile and Sirius chuckle
On the other side of the room Remus admires how happy you look, he loved your smile, loved everything about you. He snuggled into James a bit more, heart longing for you. There were so many times he wanted to tell you, merlin he hated lying to you, but he couldnât let you know he was a monster. He knew you wouldnât hate him for it, but he knew you would try to help, maybe get yourself hurt and worst of all, he was terrified you would never love him in a romantic sense once youâd seen him like that
You struggled to open the packet âYou need some help?â Sirius holding out his hands but you shake your head
âThanks PadsâŠbutâŠIâve got...ow!â you say strained as you try to rip it open but you finally get it you punch yourself in the process, yelping in pain
Remus sits right up âYou alright?â he asks worried, ignoring the amused stare from James
You whine in responseÂ
âWhat happened?â Peter asks, hand on your knee
âI was trying to open it and when it finally gave way I punched my boobâ you explain before cupping your right one and falling backwards on the bed, groaning softly as you pout
The boys try not to chuckle âWant me to kiss it betterâ Sirius wiggles his eyebrows earning your foot waving in his face âHey!â he laughs jolting his head away
Later that night James, Sirius and Peter were all adding some additions to the map on the floor so you joined Remus on his bed, the two of you munching on goodies
âHow are you feeling?â you ask softly, you had noticed he looked off the last few days and figured it must be his illness acting up again
He tenses at the question, you knew he didnât like talking about it âIâm fineâ he assures you
You clasp your hand over his, watching as his body relaxes into your touch âIâm here if you need meâ you say, head falling naturally onto his shoulder
He closed his eyes and smiled, he loved these moments âI knowâŠâ he laces your hands properly, squeezing it ââŠI really appreciate you y/nâ he confesses, he was almost drunk on tiredness but he knew he really didnât tell you that enough
You kiss his shoulder âFeelings mutual Remâ you say quietly
It was times like this you believed truly that you and he were more than friends, sure you held the others boys hands, you and Peter would cosy together as a rabbit and rat quiet often, Sirius let you cuddle him as Padfoot when you were upset, and James let you ride him as ProngsâŠof course the last one Sirius tended to bring up out of context just to make you and James mortified
âI was thinkingâ you say after a few minutes
He chuckles âShould I be scaredâ he lightly teases
You nudge your head into his neck âCheekyâ you giggle together âThereâs this reading night think at Scrolls and Tomes, free food, drinks and they are bringing a bunch of new muggle books inâÂ
Remus can feel your smile on his shoulder âI donât know if anyone else besides Wormtail would like thatâ he admits
You shake your head lightly âI was thinking it could be something for just the two of usâ your voice gentle and smooth but inside your stomach was a tizzy
His eyes widened, it sounded like you were asking him out, although if he actually thought about it, it sounded like the way Marlene and Dorca spoke, the way a group couple would ask to spend time alone together
âWhen is it?â he wonders, heart fluttering at the idea it really could be a date
âTomorrow nightâ you say happily until you feel him tense up âRem?â you lift your head to look at him
His mouth opens but shuts soon after, tomorrow was the full moon, merlin it was just his luck wasnât it âIâm really sorry but I already have plansâ he says sadly, heart physically aching watching the disappointment and sadness wash over in your eyes before it was replaced with your beautiful smileâŠyour beautiful sad smile
âThatâs okayâ you assure him, it would be silly of you to take that as a rejection, you should have asked earlier âSo what are you up to?â you inquire trying to not show the small tearing of your heart
He hesitates âUmmâŠprank set upâ he says, instantly regretting it
Prank set up? What was he thinking. One, you helped them with pranks even helped come up with them, and two, how was that important enough to merit not going with you. He didnât look at you for a second, when he did chance a look, his heart broke in two, you looked completely deflated and the worst part was you were so nice about it
âWhatâs the prankâŠI didnât know you were planning one?â you ask sadly but with a kind tone, even if you felt so angry deep down.Â
They always did this, once a month they would leave you out of something and you were getting tired of what. You stayed quiet though, Remus wasnât wellâŠor maybe he just didnât want to go on a friend date
âItâs to do with the boyâs communal bathroom down the hallâ he says hoping that ends the conversation and it does
You just nodded after that, heading back to your dorm sooner than usual looking crushed and leaving Remus riddled with guilt
You stuck to your dorm most of the next day, after last night you really werenât in the mood to hang out with your best friends, so instead you chilled with Marlene and Lily as the latter tried to teach you both how to knit
âLike this?â you say demonstrating to the redhaired girl
Her eyes light up âYes!â she claps her hands âPerfect youâre my star studentâÂ
You grin at the compliment feeling good about yourself before looking at Marlene and bursting out in giggles. Lily follows your eyes and starts laughing as well, both of you about to say something when there was a knock at the doorÂ
âHeyâŠâ Sirius says as he enters, extending the syllables before it breaks into chuckles âYou alright Marls?â he asks watching as the girl is literally ingulfed in wool
She stops struggling and accepts it, arm and shoulder stuck upwards wrapped in âIâm doing good, Lils is right, knitting is verythrepticâ she says nodding, voice laced with sarcasm
âWhat were you trying to make?â Sirius asks amused
Marlene smacks her lips a little âWould you believe a scarf for my lovely girl?â she says
âA blue scarfâ you add to which Sirius starts laughing again at the fact Marlene had every colour but blue wrapped around her
âNeed helpâ Lily holds up some scissors
Marlene shakes her head âNope Iâm perfectlyâŠ.capab-bleâŠâ she tries to break out but it only gets tighter âYes please I think Iâm losing circulationâ she changes her mind and sends a pleading look to her friend
While Lily cuts Marlene out you turn to Sirius âWhat you need Pads?â you smile at the boy âAlso do you like the jumperâŠI think Rem would suit itâ you hold up a half-finished jumperâŠthat Lily totally started for you but you were taking full credit for
He nods âYes heâs going to love itâ and love you more than he does already âI was just sent to give these to Redâ Sirius pulls out some chocolates and flowers from behind his back
Lily turns to look, as well as a now free Marlene âOh my god!â she says excited, practically skipping over to the boy and taking the flowers.Â
Smelling them, she does a little spin before taking the chocolate
âYou like them?â Sirius asks with a knowing smile
âLike them, I love them!â she exclaims with the biggest smile before it drops briefly âSiri please donât tellâŠâ
ââŠtell him you love it and him because you arenât readyâ he finishes for her, giving the girl a small hug and kiss to the temple âDonât worry Iâll tell him you thought it was nice of him as alwaysâ he says glancing at you as he finishes and winking
As Lily sits down, completely giddy over her gift you and Marlene turn back to Sirius âSo what you guys up to tonight?â Marlene asks
For the first time since he came in you see Siriusâ face falter but he quickly recovers âJames wants us to help him with thisâŠughâŠassignment we got in detention, weâve been planning on working on it tonight for agesâ he says quickly before taking his leave
âThat was weirdâŠâ Marlene notes as the door closes, looking at you confused as does Lily
You nod, heart sinking âIt wasâŠI think Iâm going to go check on themâ you say standing up
âItâs almost curfew so be careful if you go out, outâ Lily reminds you
Marlene giggles âMerlin Lils be less of a mumâ she says earning a stuck out nose from Lily
âIâll be fineâŠmumâ you tease grabbing your jumper and slipping it on in case you did end up outside âOh Marlsâ you say as you reach the door âIf Lily is my mum then are you my wine aunt?â
âI prefer the sexy adopted cousin that you would have a scandalous affair withâ she says casually while Lily half chokes on the air
You bob your head âI could see thatâŠmaybe another life timeâ you say blowing her a kiss and seeing her fall back catching it before you leave the dorm
You walked towards the main part of the common room, stopping at the small balcony you saw your friends heading out. You were mad now, Remus had lied to you, so had Sirius and it hurt more than anything. It was like they didnât even see you as a marauder anymore, for almost two years, ever since you all became animagi, besides Remus who said he couldnât due to his condition, they had disappeared every month. You didnât mind if they wanted alone time, guy time or whatever they called it but lying to you to get it was a big no and you were going to confront them
Following them you ended up outside, you saw them heading to the forest but your jeans got caught on some bushes. While freeing your leg you cut yourself, it was tiny, along where the back of your hand and wrist met, but it still bled. You didnât have time to care about it as you hiked towards the forest, passing by the willow at a safe distanceâŠno way you were going near that thing after you and James and got stuck in it overnight in 3rd year
You hugged yourself as you walked through the trees, it was getting late and cold now. They wouldnât have gone this far in, would they? Looking up you could see the full moon in the sky, you pouted thinking of Remus, your moon, the boy you loved more than anything, who was also lying to you. Huffing you decided to just go back inside but as you were about to take a step you heard something that made you freeze in complete horrorÂ
A howl
You knew there were wolfs in the forest but they didnât sound like that, those were nice, friendly howls while this was deeper, scarierâŠit was that of a werewolf.Â
Looking around you tried to judge if any of the tree were climbable, you paid attention in class there was no way in hell you could out run it and it would catch your scent soon if it hadnât already. Just as you were about to attempt climbing you heard distant cracking of twigs and patters on the forest floor.Â
You turned to the direction it was coming from, this was how you were going to die, you knew the marauders would kill you one day but right now waitâŠmaraudersâŠmoonyâŠhis conditionâŠscarsâŠgone once a monthâŠ
Remus was a werewolf, more specifically the werewolf that was going to kill youâŠoh if you werenât shitting yourself this would be poetically tragic in some way
Your head snapped to see a large shadow stalk out of the bushes about 50m away, you needed a plan, you couldnât die like this, he would never forgive himself. It tilted its head at you clearly gearing itself to pounce, you wondered where the other boys were and then it hit you, you could shift, your rabbit self could hide easier
You closed your eyes and focused everything on shifting but your panic was making it difficult, especially as you heard him approaching. You finally feel yourself shifting but it was too late, werewolves attack was in motion and your bunny self was launched into a nearby tree.Â
Looking around everything was fuzzy. You whimpered, unable to shift back as you were in immeasurable pain, you couldnât even tell where or what the injury was. As you lost consciousness the last thing you saw was Siriusâ Padfoot form licking your wounds and sad grey eyes staring down at you
James and Peter led Remus off and when they were at a safe distance Sirius shifted back into his normal form, looking down at the injured bunny, the y/h/c fur, little y/c/e eyes staring up at him helplessly before they closed, he knew it was you and he felt like the whole world ended
âY/nâ he was already fully in tears, gently shaking your little body âNo merlin pleaseâŠplease you need to wake upâ he sobs harder as you donât move
A series of âpleasesâ and ânosâ left his lips as he thought you were dead, but then he hears the tiniest whine, noticing your chest rising and falling through his tears
âYou stay with meâ he orders you as he takes off his jumper and wraps you in it, blood soaking his white shirt as he started to run towards the castle âDonât you dare die on meâ
Remus groaned as he woke. When he realised he was already in the hospital wing, he let his head fall back onto the soft pillows. He couldnât remember a thing, usually he did but on some occasions when he hurt himself particularly badly he would black out the memory. Problem was he didnât feel injured, if anything there were cuts than usual and that worried him, more so as he only seen James and Peter approaching the bed
He sits up quickly, pain streaking across his chest but he didnât care âWhereâs Siriusâ he asks in complete alarm
James and Peters faces didnât help âRemusâŠâ James says quietly, unsure of how to tell him
âJamesâ Remus says terrified âWhere is Siriusâ he says the words slowly, a lump in his throat
âIâm here Moonsâ Sirius says approaching from down the way, looking distraught, shirt covered in blood, eyes raw
Remusâ eyes widen, shifting to get up, clutching his stomach as he sits legs daggling on the edge of the bed âAre you okay?â he asks, unable to stand due to the pain âIâm so sorryâŠthereâs so much bloodâÂ
Sirius glanced towards James and Peter, both have tears in their eyes, giving him a look that said âthis is going to kill himâÂ
âItâs not my bloodâ Sirius says hesitantly, letting out a shaky breath as he looks over his shoulder to the bed hidden by the curtains
Remus follows his eyes âOh godâ he mouths drops open, chin trembling, he hurt someone, what if he turned them, turned them into a monster too
âRemusâŠâ Sirius starts running his fingers through his hair âSheâŠsheâŠâ he canât bare himself to say it out loud but Remus seems to get it
His heart dropped looking at the curtain, face filled with dread âNoâ he shakes his head âSirius pleaseâ he begs as his eyes fill with tears âPlease tell me sheâŠshe wasnâtâŠâÂ
When Sirius says nothing he has his answer, fully breaking down clutching his chest, his injuries forgotten by the searing pain in his heart
âRe-â Sirius goes to reach out and hold him but Remus pushes by him, shaking his head as he stumbles over to the curtains
He closes his eyes for a moment, breaking heavily before he opens the curtains. He lets out a sob, seeing your tiny little form, you were in your bunny form, battered and bruised
âWhatâŠâ he turns back to James who has joined him while over his shoulder Sirius and Peter crying into each other beside his bed
James walks over to your bed âShe shifted we thinkâ he says quietly âJustâŠjust not in timeâ he looks at you pained then back to Remus âItâs not your fault, youâŠâ
âYes, it isâ Remus snaps at him, leaning over your broken frame, seeing the gash over your abdomen, blood sticking to your usually soft fur âY/nâ his head collapses into the bed beside you âIâm so sorryâ he blubs into the covers, letting out a strangled scream
Remus felt more pain in that moment than every full moon rolled into one. He knew why you were in the forest because he knew what you were like. You knew he was lying yesterday and you followed him, it was his fault, he put you in this position and he hurt you, almost killed you. He heard James say something about Poppy not wanting to shift you back forcibly yet as your wounds needed to heal first, but in better news you didnât get infected with Lycanthropy
James listens to Remusâ cries for hours, eventually carrying him back to his bed when he passed out from sheer exhaustion. The next morning Remus was told he could go to his dorm but he wouldnât leave until you had shifted back and mid-afternoon Poppy did just that.Â
The boys then took Remus to their room and he didnât leave his bed for the next week, only for the bathroom and one forced shower where James washed him while he just stood there with no tears left to cry. Another week passed and he didnât leave his bed, even when the boys rushed in and told him you had woke up and you were okay. He was relieved but then pulled the covers over him, readying himself for the love of his life to hate him forever
The first thing you saw when you woke up was Sirius asleep by your bed. As he slept Madam Pomfrey and Dumbledore explained to you that two weeks had passed since the full moon. They told you that you would heal but would have permanent scars, one running down chest to your navel and another from just below your right breast to your left hip
When you asked about Remus they told you he was fine in a physical sense but hadnât returned to classes nor left his dorm room. You wanted to go to him but you couldnât, you were on forced bed rest until you were one hundred percent. The other boys visited you every day and every day you asked about Remus
âHeâs doesnât want to leave the dorm, hasnât spoken muchâ
âHeâs blaming himself, he thinks itâs all his faultâ
âStill hasnât left his bed but heâs eating nowâ
You took that one as a small victory, at least he was eating.Â
While you were on bed rest you finished the jumper, knitting a half crescent moon on the upper side of one arm and a carrot on the other with a little help from LilyâŠokay Lily did it but you helped by holding the wool
Almost three weeks had now passed from the full moon and you were officially allowed to leave. Grabbing the jumper, you went straight to Remusâ dorm, the boys hadnât told him you would be coming out of fear he would hide from you so when you knocked on the door and there was no response you just let yourself in
Walking in slowly you saw a lump under the covers of Remusâ bed, soft snores coming from it. You approached as quietly as you could, placing the jumper on the bedside table as you took in his appearance. He looked like he hadnât slept in weeks, eyes puffy and red, chalk white as he lay on his back, head fallen to the side
Slipping off your shoes you sat on the bed, snuggling yourself into his side over the covers âOh Remâ you nudge your nose with his, hearing him hum but not wake
Your thumb brushed over the area just shy of a new scar on his jaw. You had almost a whole week to think about what had happened, your anger was gone now, replaced with the wantâŠno need to be with him, look after him, let him know you were there and never ever leaving him
You watched him sleep for a bit before you rested your eyes, not going to sleep just soaking up the feeling of being near him when you heard his voice âY/n?â he asks like it was a question, like he wasnât sure if you actually existed
Your eyes fluttered open âHiâ you give him a warm smile
His heart stopped, staring at you wide eyed and now fully awake, you were here, really here. He had imagined what you would say to him so many times, he always imagined you crying, shouting, all negative. The only time you werenât was in his deepest dreams, in those you didnât know, you werenât ever hurt and all if this was a nightmareâŠbut it was real and now had to face it.Â
The smile never left your lips, why werenât you mad at him? Did you not know it was him, you must haveâŠwait, were you accepting him? But how could you accept and forgive a him after what he did to you?Â
You see his panic, he wants to run away and you understand why so when he sits up and pushes the covers down with his feet in order to do so you climb over him. He lets out a small gasp as you straddle him, pushing his shoulders down like he couldnât just lift you up off of him if he really wanted to
âDonâtâ you shake your head, a pout on your face
He looks confused âY/nâŠâ his eyes start to water âPleaseâ
âNoâ you say firmly, no way in hell were you leaving
For the first time he properly looked at you, you seemed okay, like nothing had ever happened, same bright eyes that held same love as before. You were still his sweet little bunny but he really was the big bad wolf.
In all his years he called himself a monster but deep down he had convinced himself he wasnât really, that he wouldnât ever hurt anyone just like his friends and parents said. Now he truly felt like one and he was shamed, utterly destroyed
âY/n Iâm so, so sorryâ he breaks down in front of you, his hands moving to clutch onto your own that rest on his shoulders âItâs all my fault, I understand if you hate me, I hate meâŠIâm aâŠgod Iâm sorryâ he says pained, tears streaming down his face
You slip your hands out from his tight grip and cup his face âHey look at meâ he shakes his head refusing to look at you âLook at me Remusâ he still refuses so you force his face up
He looks at you broken, a shell of himself
âIt isnât your faultâ his eyebrows pinch âListen to meâ your hands shift up on his face âIt isnât, you canât stop what your wolf does on a full moon, you arenât in control and so it isnât your faultâÂ
He just watches you as you continue, hands gripping at the hem of your jumperÂ
âI went into the forest, myself at night IâŠdonâtâ you stop him from arguing âI put myself in that position, not you, not Sirius, me. I should have waited until morning and asked you, but we can talk about what ifâs for the rest of our lives. What if you had told me, what if I wasnât a bunny, what if you were never turnedâŠand in the end Rem none of that will change anything, so none of that, nothing you have or ever do will make me hate you, stop loving youâÂ
His eyes light at the last part, what kind of love?
âI love you, love you Remâ you answer for him as if you could read his mind
He presses his forehead to yours âIâŠI love you tooâ he confesses closing his eyes âAlways loved you but you donât want to be with a guy like me y/nâ he pulls back âEven if you arenât scared of me, which love you should be, Iâm notâŠIâm poorâ
âYou can be my house husbandâ you suggest in a light-hearted tone, one that makes his heart flutter, even now you were trying to make him feel better
âI couldnât have kidsâ he says sadly
âWe can adopt or not have some, we could get a dog but Pads would get jealousâ you say and he almost smiles
âIâm like an old man, my bones ache constantlyâÂ
You kiss his cheek âSo weâll need a big bathâ you assure him
You were never giving up and he knew that
âIâm littered with scars y/n, they're not attractive, they're ugly, I'm uglyâ he says
You shake your head, thinking for a minute before you pulled up the hem of his shirt
âWhat are you doing?â he says a little panicked, cupping your hands âYou donât want to see them, I donât want you to see themâ
âPlease RemâÂ
His face contoured before he nods slowly, letting you pull the material over his head, revealing his chest. He watched your face, there was no disgust, in fact you smiled at it like it was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen
His eyes widen as you grip the bottom of your jumper, grips your wrists quickly before you can do what he thinks youâre doing âY/nâ he asks bewildered
You shrug off his hands âItâs okayâ you smile at him before taking off your shirt
Remus looks deep into the room and your heart fluttered at how respectful he was being
âRem please lookâ you say fingers gently trailing over his jaw and pulling it to face you
His eyes flicked to your breasts first something you noticed and bit your lip at as you could see the blush and scold he gave himself. He then looked down, face filled with hurt as he saw the scars, fingers moving to trail over where they crossed on your stomach
âIâm so sorryâ he apologises once again
You take both of his hands in yours making him look up at you âRemus are theseâŠâ you gesture to your stomach ââŠugly, do they make me ugly?â
He shakes his head right away âNo, youâre beautiful, so so beautifulâ squeezing your hands tightly, like he was trying to force his love for you through them into you
You smile âThen...â you slip one hand out of his and trace the scars on his chest â...you canât call these unattractive and ugly because then you are calling me soâÂ
He lets out a small smile, tilting his head as he looks at you with so much love. How did he managed to find someone as wonderful as you?
âYou have no idea how much I love you, appreciate everything you do for meâ he cups your cheek with his free hand as his other rubs over your knuckles
âI am pretty greatâ you admit and he laughs âAlthough next time you donât want to go on a date with me, just say, donât turn into a werewolf and bitch slap me into a treeâ you say so playfully and casually he canât stop the small laugh that sound like a âhuhâ come out
His nose scrunches up âI shouldnât have laughed at thatâ he scolds himself but the smile stays âWhy am I smiling, thatâs really not funnyâ he looks at you stunned
You giggle placing a kiss to his nose to which his eyes flick down to your lips and kiss your nose back
âI love you Remâ you say planting a peck to the corner of his lips which he again copies âIâm never leaving you, youâre stuck with this bunny forever, my beautifulâ a kiss to the other corner and he copyâs âbeautifulâ his lips and yours âmoonâÂ
After a few seconds you pull away, remembering "Oh" you smile brightly leaning over and grabbing the jumper "I made you this! Well Lily did but helped, look theres a little moon and a carrot and...mhm"
He pulls you in for a proper kiss, unable to wait anymore, the jumper falling from your grip as your lips moving in sync, making up for all of the almost kisses throughout the years
As you pull apart you lean your foreheads together âMy moonâ you say with the upmost endearment
âMy bunnyâ he returns it with the same sentiment
Thank you for reading đ
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i have a request for roommate!spencer where he's just miserable that no one remembered his birthday at work but when he gets home his roommate just welcomes him with the most thoughtful gift and a warm hug PLEASE
thank you for requesting! <3 fem!reader
The lights are off. The air conditioning blows a shade too cold. Spencer shrugs off his jacket and acknowledges that, despite his awful, aching day, itâs nice to be home.Â
The living room is clean where it hadnât been this morning when he left. If he had to clean it by himself, heâd die. It mustâve taken a good hour or longer, even the floor shines sparkling clean.Â
âHey?â he asks into the open air, wondering where you are.Â
âSpencer!â you yelp from the kitchen, âHey, what took you so long? Itâs almost seven!âÂ
He sighs to himself with a great dash of self-pity. âI know. Had to stay and finish something. You cleaned?âÂ
âI had to! Quick, come in here, I need your help with something.âÂ
He doesnât want to help, he wants to lay down in bed. Spencer wonders how a normal person, a normal boy, would feel after a day like today. He wonders if Morgan would go home and lay in bed and cry. He wonders if it could ever be possible for everyone to forget Morganâs birthday.Â
Spencer hangs his jacket on the rack and puts his bag by the shoes. Heâs tempted to go to bed and pretend he hasnât heard you, but he supposes he shouldnât. Heâd sort of been hoping youâd text him happy birthday, and but that never happened. He doesnât think anybody in the world besides his mom knows what day it is today, and Spencer had to remind her, so.Â
âSpence,â you say, your smile of a calibre heâs never witnessed, standing in front of the kitchen island with your hands behind your back, âI hope you know Iâve been waiting two whole hours for you to get back. Actually, Iâve been waiting all day, but you canât be blamed for working. Okay. Are you ready?âÂ
âAm I ready? What did you want help with?âÂ
You step to the side, grinning, the sleeves of your nice blouse like big, soft petals around your wrists and against your thighs. âTada!â you say, guiding his attention to the silver platter on the countertop, a chocolate cake at centre stage and stuck with candles, flames aglow. âI rushed to light them when I heard the door,â you tell him, and he can hear your breathlessness now, your excitement for him evident. âA lot of candles, youâre getting old! Too old for chocolate sprinkle. I shouldâve got you something sophisticated.âÂ
âYou got me a cake?âÂ
âItâs your birthday,â you say happily. âHappy birthday, Spencer. I got you some presents, too, but the cake is the best, itâs from the Leaven. How fancy is that?âÂ
âWill you sing?â he asks.Â
He doesnât know why he asks. Heâs mostly kidding, but you smile shyly and beckon him toward you. âIâll sing. Come stand over here.âÂ
You sing him happy birthday, and he blows out his candles, only ten candles altogether but enough to feel like a kid as the heat kisses his chin.Â
âOkay, and I got you this,â you say, finally pulling both hands from behind your back, seemingly eager to move the focus from your performance.
Itâs a bundle about as thick as an average novel. He knows itâll be books before he opens it, because you know him, and itâs in your nature to give him your everything.Â
He doesnât look at them. He takes the package blindly and shoves it onto the counter, wrapping you in a hug so hard it makes your back click. âIâm sorry,â he says, but he doesnât let go. You donât make him. âSorry, I justâ Iââ Youâre the only one who remembered. âThank you for the cake.âÂ
You hug him not quite as hard, but tight. âHey, itâs okay. I love you, youâre my best friend ever, you can pop me like a roll of dough any day of the week.â You might be exaggerating. Spencer doesnât know. âBut especially today, you know. You can have anything you want.âÂ
Spencer should let go. Anything you want, youâd said. He hugs you until heâs sure youâre sick of him, your thumb pressing little circles into his shoulder, his arms tucked up under your armpits and around your back. âThanks,â you murmur.
âWhat?â he asks. âFor what?âÂ
âFor such a good hug. And being a great roommate. And for not complaining about the candles.âÂ
âThe candles are perfect.âÂ
You lean back in his arms. âThank you. Now what do you want first, cake or dinner?âÂ
Spencer really wants another hug. âUm. Cake?âÂ
âGood choice, handsome.â
His cheeks are pink by the time he gets a slice, but itâs the best birthday cake heâs ever had.
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is anyone else having a problem with clicking on links today?
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remus who needs to make eye contact with reader when talking bc she has his full attention but she tries averting her gaze and heâs Tall so he does that thing where he bends his head down/chases her eyes so they maintain contact
ugh this!!!!!!!! he definitely does this, so hot of him honestly. I didnât do justice to your idea at all but I gave it a shot!!!
rockstar!remus lupin x fem!reader
Remus gets off stage and heâs somehow a billion times hotter than he was two hours ago. Itâs cruel. Heâs the kind of handsome that begs to be looked at. You donât blame his screaming fans. Not when youâd definitely be one of them if it werenât for your lucky position of the bassists girlfriend.
âHey,â Remus says, slinging his bass over his shoulder as he jogs towards you. His headset dangles around his neck, makeup smudged under his eyes and his hair in disarray, and yet he heads straight for you, brushing away a couple of techies who try to wave him down. He comes to a halt in front of you, still buzzing with onstage energy. âCan I hug you?â
âYeah,â you nod, breathless and heâs only said a few words. Heâs so handsome you canât think straight. He hugs you hard, and you donât even care that heâs sweating buckets. His arms cage you, strong and heavy, and he smells like sweat and musk, his cologne subtle but heady.
âYou played amazing,â you tell him as his hands roam your back, one between your shoulder blades and another at the small of your back, pressing you in.
Remus pulls back, hot hands sliding to hold you by the shoulders. He squeezes you, calloused thumbs at your collar. Heâs smiling so big youâre sure his cheeks hurt. â
âCause I had my lucky charm,â he says, chucking you under the chin. âIâm so glad you came, pretty girl.â
Heat flares behind your cheeks. You canât believe heâs real, canât believe heâs this handsome and calling you pretty and telling you heâs glad you came to his show. As if youâd ever even think about being anywhere else tonight but here. You dip your head so you donât have to look at his handsome face, opting instead for the dirty backstage floor.
âIâm glad I came too,â you mumble, toeing a rogue piece of confetti with the tip of your shoe.
Remus follows you down, bending to your height and tilting his head up so youâre forced to look him in the eyes. Heâs gorgeous and heâs lovely and heâs so close you could kiss him.
âWhat did you say, sweetheart?â He asks, lips quirked, his mouth so close that his warm breath fans over your lips. âCanât hear you when you get all shy like that.â
You groan. Heâs awful. âIâm not shy,â you protest, though you are, especially with him. You stick your chin out in a show of fake confidence. âI said Iâm glad I came too.â
Remusâ grins and thumbs your jaw, then cards a hand through his messy, sweaty hair. âMm, I bet you are, sweetheart.â
You know heâs teasing. You donât mind it as much as you should.
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you frustrate me incredibly, sweetheart.
Who knew that having Remus Lupin as your academic rival could be so enjoyable?
note: classic academic rivals to lovers trope, remus lupin calling you sweetheart ACK
tags: @burningwitchprincess
sincerelyyycece © â all rights reserved. please do not repost/translate/copy any of my work.
Y/N Y/L/N stood out as an exceptional individual, effortlessly excelling in all endeavours. Her professors held her in high regard, and her peers looked up to her with a mix of admiration and envy, yearning to emulate her brilliance or bask in her presence. Within her academic department, she held a prominent position, often the subject of conversation and admiration, embodying the epitome of "brains and beauty."
Confident in her abilities, Y/N never fretted about being outshone academically, firmly believing in her own supremacy. While she garnered some rivals, she dismissed them as unworthy of her attention, except for one: Remus Lupin. Despite her initial disbelief, Remus once surpassed her in one of her favoured subjects, leaving Y/N both bewildered and intrigued. From that moment on, Remus became her foremost academic rival.
Y/N found amusement in besting Remus at class activities, relishing in her victories, yet seething with jealousy whenever Remus claimed an award she coveted. Their rivalry provided a captivating spectacle and a source of entertainment that heightened the stakes of academic achievement.
Their ongoing rivalry stretched across countless months, captivating everyone as they eagerly watched the intense competition between them. She harboured a strong disdain for him, and she suspected Remus felt similarly. Yet, as the saying goes, the boundary between love and hate can be remarkably thin.
It all began in the Care of Magical Creature class. She couldn't pinpoint the exact moment or reason, but whenever she laid eyes on Remus, a strange sensation gripped her.
As he presented his project to the audience, something about his demeanour made him unexpectedly appealing. When did he become so captivating? She hadn't even realized she was admiring him until their eyes met. Caught off guard, she quickly averted her gaze, trying to regain her composure. What just happened? She sighed in frustration, closing her eyes momentarily.
From then on, conflicting emotions about him plagued her thoughts incessantly. He occupied her mind entirely, and she yearned to free herself from his influence. The situation grew increasingly perplexing for her. She went to great lengths to avoid him, strategically ensuring they never crossed paths in class. Despite this, she remained actively engaged in her studies, except when Remus was involved.
She believed she'd successfully dodged him. Keyword: almost. En route to her next class, she found herself abruptly pulled into an empty classroom. Just as she was gearing up to give the stranger a piece of her mind, he beat her to it. "Why are you avoiding me?" came an all-too-familiar voice, causing her to tense. "Well?" he prodded.
"I'm not avoiding you, Lupin," she replied, turning to confront him. "I'm simply preoccupied with my studies," she shrugged. Remus emitted a small snort and remarked, "Please. You can come up with a better excuse than that, sweetheart." The endearment melted her, but she pretended to grimace at it, retorting, "I've asked you not to call me that."
"Not until you enlighten me on the genuine cause of your avoidance," he interjected, clearly teasing. "I've told you, I'm swamped with my academics!" she protested. He responded with a buzzer-like noise akin to those in TV game shows. "Incorrect. Try again," he prompted. "This is so ridiculous," she groaned. Once more, he replicated the sound, drawing out the exchange. "Ugh, I can't stand you!" she finally exploded. That's not true.
"That's not true," Remus interjected, almost as if he were privy to her thoughts. "What?" she murmured softly. "You don't hate me," he remarked with such ease, as though it were a commonplace observation. Her eyebrows furrowed. "What leads you to believe that?" she inquired, hoping to conceal her nerves. "I just have a feeling," he replied nonchalantly, shrugging.
"And what basis does this feeling have?" she pressed, her patience waning as his responses remained terse. "Just a hunch," he reiterated. "You're not making any sense," she protested. "If we're finished with this conversation, I need to head to class. I'm already running late."
As she moved toward the door, he halted her with a sudden confession, addressing her by her first name, a departure from his usual address. She turned back, silently urging him to continue. "I don't hate you," he admitted. Her expression twisted in confusion. "But you do," she retorted.
Remus shook his head, his smile unwavering. "No, really," she persisted. "You hate me!" Once again, Remus refuted her claim. She sighed inwardly in frustration. "Then why have you been competing with me relentlessly? Why strive so hard for the top spot if you don't harbour any animosity towards me?" she demanded.
"I confess," Remus began, "the only reason I've been your constant rival is because it was the only way to capture your attention." He paused as he noticed her silence, then added, "Your intellect has always fascinated me. I've admired you from afar, too intimidated to approach you directly. So, I engaged in every debate, competition, and challenge to ensure your focus was on me, if only for those moments when our minds clashed."
With a deep breath, he continued, "But now, I want more than just rivalry. I want to be the one you choose, the one you love."
My demeanour softened at his confession. I had mistaken his competitiveness for mutual hatred, yet he had been tirelessly vying for my attention all along. His confession made me realize his feelings for me. As Remus anxiously waited for my response, I finally spoke up, saying, "I've spent countless hours competing against you, but I've come to a realization." Remus visibly relaxed upon hearing my voice. "I no longer desire competition. Instead, I want to work with you, beside you, because... because I've fallen in love with you too."
He flashed a grin and remarked, "You frustrate me incredibly, sweetheart." I responded with a smile, quipping, "It's my forte."
With that, he tenderly encircled his arms around my waist, murmuring, "Can I kiss you?" I couldn't help but chuckle as I noticed the hint of a pout on his lips. He pleaded, "Pretty please?" I closed my eyes, leaning in to meet his lips. The kiss unfolded languidly as if we were relishing each other's presence. As he eventually drew back, he sported a foolish grin. He jestingly remarked, "Perhaps this is my finest reward yet." I couldn't help but snort at his cheesy humour.
Their lips met again in a moment that seemed to suspend time, sealing their newfound affection with a tender promise. With the weight of competition lifted, they embarked on a journey together, intertwining their paths in both love and academia. As they walked out of the empty classroom hand in hand, Y/N knew that their story was just beginning, brimming with possibilities and shared dreams. And in that moment, surrounded by the quiet hum of their shared laughter, she realized that sometimes rivalry could blossom into the most unexpected love story of all.
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I really hope you mean here đ€
Request: "Remus is being rude to the reader due to the upcoming full moon.. make it as angsty as you can"
Thanks for requesting babe <3
cw: migraine, Rem is mean :(
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ⥠1.2k words
When you come home from work, the apartment is dark and thereâs evidence of Remusâ shit day everywhere.Â
The curtains are drawn closed against the sunlight, and thereâs a discarded blanket on the couch and several snack containers half-emptied on the coffee table. One of them has tipped onto the floor, a mess of crisps your boyfriend was likely feeling too unwell to tidy. Heâs spilled tea on the table, too. These kinds of things are more common in the days before the full moon, but you think he must really be having a rough one. Even a few unwashed dishes in the sink is usually enough to stress Remus out, so he has to have been in a state to leave things like this.Â
You brew a fresh cup of tea, grabbing some chocolates from the cabinet in case he didnât bring any with him, and broach the bedroom. A shape moves under the sheets when the door creaks open.Â
âHi,â you say softly. You kneel by the bed, lightly touching the ends of Remusâ hair. âHow are you, love?âÂ
âBad,â he mutters from beneath the covers. You wince. He must be, if he wonât even lower the sheets beneath his eyes.Â
You do your best to keep the pity from your voice, knowing heâd hate it. âI brought you some tea,â you murmur, âif you want it.â
âCanât right now.âÂ
âItâs chamomile,â you coax. âIt might helpââ
âI canât.â The low rumble of his voice takes on a hard edge, and you fall instantly silent. You nod even though he canât see it, setting the tea and chocolate on his nightstand as quietly as you can.Â
You donât tell him youâre going, sure every footstep is agonizingly loud for him. You force down the lump in your throat. Remus is miserable right now; heâs not thinking about how his tone affects you, and thatâs not his fault. He doesnât mean anything by it. You can deal with it, help anyways.
You sweep instead of vacuuming, gathering the little bits of crisps into a dustpan and dumping them in the trash. The half-eaten snacks get reshelved in your cabinets, the puddle of tea cleaned off the coffee table, and candles lit to banish the stale smell in the living room. The cinnamon ones are usually Remusâ favorite, but you trade them out for lavender on the off chance it helps with his headache. Youâre washing dishes one at a time so they donât clatter when the bedroom door creaks open.Â
âHey,â you say, relieved. âFeeling better?âÂ
âNo.â Remusâ voice is low, and the scratch of it tears at your heartstrings. He trudges to the end of the hall, where he stops, rubbing his forehead with his thumb and forefinger. âI need you to be quiet.âÂ
âOh, sorry.â You soften your voice, freezing with your hands submerged in the warm dishwater. âIâve been trying, I didnât realize you could hear. Iâm almost done with this, soââÂ
âCould you stop?â he asks, tone going harsh again. âJust, be quiet or find somewhere else to be, please. I canât deal with this.âÂ
You swallow against the intrusion in your throat. Will away the heat from your face. âOkay,â you say, the word barely a whisper.Â
Remus turns, plodding back to the bedroom. You hear the door shut.
You leave the dishwater to get cold rather than pouring it out and making more noise. You sit down on the couch with a book, eyes skimming over the words as you convince yourself over and over that itâd be stupid to cry about this. Your face heats, then cools. Tears blur your vision and you blink them away. This is ridiculous. Remus is just moody, he didnât mean it. You know better than to take anything he says to heart right now. You canât expect your efforts to be properly appreciated, but the important part is to keep making them. When heâs feeling better, heâll thank you in a million sweet ways, because thatâs who he is. He loves you. He didnât mean it.Â
Itâs dark outside when the bedroom door creaks open again. You hadnât noticed night falling, even when the light became too dim for you to make out the words on your page. You set your book down; you hadnât been reading anyway.Â
Remus sits next to you without a word. He leans the side of his head against the cushion with a sigh.Â
âDove?â he murmurs.Â
You donât dare do more than hum in response.Â
A scarred hand finds your leg, the thumb sweeping back and forth over your skin. âIâm sorry for snapping at you,â he says quietly. âThat wasâŠit was really mean. And undeserved.â
âIâm sorry I was being loud,â you reply, and you canât help it, your throat clogs all over again. âI was just trying to help.âÂ
Your voice catches on the last word, and Remus makes a pained sound that has you silencing yourself instantly. He makes another at your response.Â
âFuck, Iâm so sorry,â he rasps. âDo you want a hug?âÂ
You bite down on your lower lip. âAre you okay to hug?âÂ
âYeah, sweetheart.âÂ
He meets you in the middle, pressing upon your shoulder blades like he can hold you together by sheer physical force. You try for his sake, swallowing the cries that rise in your throat.Â
âIâm sorry,â he says again, palm marking a slow path up and down your back. âYou werenât too loud, Iâm just fussy. You were only being your kind self. I had no reason to be so horrid.âÂ
âYou werenât horrid,â you warble. âI know youâre having a hard time.âÂ
âThatâs no excuse.â His palm makes its way back to your shoulders just in time to feel the first little sob escape you. Remusâ grip tightens. âAw, dovey. Iâm so, so sorry. I canât believe I spoke to you like that.âÂ
âItâs okay.âÂ
âItâs not,â he murmurs, kissing the exposed bit of skin where your shirt is slipping down your shoulder. âItâs not, andââ He pauses, looking around the room for the first time. âDid you clean?âÂ
You nod against his front, feeling the pained sigh that leaves him.Â
âFuck, Iâm awful.âÂ
âYouâre not.âÂ
âYou were cleaning up my mess, and I yelled at you.â Now Remusâ voice sounds a tad raw too. He gathers you closer, stubble scratching your forehead as he kisses your hairline. âMy sweet girl. You should have ripped me a new one.âÂ
âYou werenât yelling,â you point out, teasing a bit now, âand anyway, it seemed like you were already being ripped a new one.âÂ
âStill,â he mumbles into your hair. âYou lit the lavender candles and everything. You deserve to put me through hell.âÂ
âYouâre already going through hell,â you remind him gently, brushing a kiss against his cheek. âI donât need to help the process along. Do you want some tea, love?âÂ
Remus hums. âI do, but let me get it. Let me get some for you, too, yeah?â He leans back to look down at you. âYou want some nighttime tea, darling?âÂ
Youâre alright really, but you tell him you do anyway. He looks nearly happy as he drags himself into the kitchen, and he wonât stop mollycoddling you for the rest of the night.Â
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itâs time to go | r. lupin
Sheâs a brilliant witch. The perfect pure blood daughter from the House of Black. His best friendâs twin sister. The girl heâs always loved. Everything he wants but cannot have. And heâs just Remus. JustâŠ.Remus. Her unwilling engagement and a party at Grimmauld Place is sure to be the least perfect situation for a heart to heart.
part 2 part 3
WORD COUNT: 3,2k
PAIRING: remus lupin x female reader (siriusâ sister, no physical descriptors)
CONTENTS: angstâŠ. like,, a lot / talks of low self esteem and self worth over remusâ condition / arranged marriage / mentions of alcohol consumption and smoking
A/N: (this is a repost, the original is an oc version) Iâve had this idea in my head for months and I finally got around to writing it. this is heavily inspired by Ms. Swiftâs itâs time to go, although it has nothing to do with the actual song and itâs way more heartbreaking than I intended it to be x
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