I enjoy other peoples art and I hope you do too. 20. Male. Speaking of art, Profile picture is by Rapid-artwork.tumblr.com
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The worst part is exhaling the shaky breath and the tears don't come. I breath out and by the time I've drawn another breath i feel nothing. Just an ache with no release.
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I remember when feeling hollow inside felt like some kind of curse, now i wish it would just come back. Why is it that it only lets me feel the bad parts of my life? Why when I want to smile do I feel nothing, why when I need to cry do I feel nothing, why when I start to feel stupid do I suddenly get to feel again? Why when I feel angry do I suddenly get emotion. If they are going to leave i want them all to go. I don’t want some of them to stay. I don’t want to hurt. I just want to feel anything else. It would feel amazing if i could even cry right now. Honestly i just want it all to go away. I’m such a fuck up.
#I'm sorry#ignore this#i needed to vent#i have nowhere to vent#so here it is#depression#like diagnosed too not just a box i checked because i felt bad once#Even when my life was going well this happened.#I think i'd be better off dead.
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Some of my Inktober drawings so far. Really love the Kuroo one <3
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It Takes Some Time: Part 1?
Hey hey I’m back in action with a bit of writing. This was more or less improvised. I just sort of let it flow naturally and took it from there. I apologize if it is a little messy or boring. It is a bit long for some people but I hope you enjoy. ^_^
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“Hey! Connor! Did you go out to get food today!?” The question rang out from the kitchen, muffled partly from the barrier of the wall between there and the living room and partially because Connor was sure his roommate had his head buried in the fridge. Of course this meant that his roommate already knew the answer to that question.
“Sorry dude, had work all day I forgot.” Connor actually hadn’t forgotten, well not exactly but he wasn’t about to let it slip that he avoided the task on purpose. Quinn would be pissed if he learned he didn’t want to shop just avoid his Ex who had been working the register that day.
“You forgot? Dude you work right next to the grocery store, how the hell did you forget? You walk past it coming home.” The voice was closer now and Connor could see her standing in the doorway, hands on hips, over the edge of his laptop.
“Quinn I’m sorry it just slipped my mind, I had to do about fifty returns in like the last hour today. I swear forty something white moms are the god damned worst with this shit.” Connor rolled his eyes and finally looked up from the almost completely blank text file he had open. “If you want I can go out and get stuff now. The Pharmacy at the corner should still be open and they have groceries. I don’t know why we don’t shop there anyways it’s closer.” Quinn just let out a long sigh and turned heel back into the kitchen where the unmistakable sound of a fridge being shut in a not so calm fashion could be heard.
“Fuck it, I’m going out. Please just get food so I don’t have to eat fast food tomorrow I’m trying to make weight.” After the, um ‘gentle’ closing of the front door of the apartment the harpy was gone. Of course that wasn’t really a fair description of her. While Quinn did have some issues keeping calm she was still one of Connor’s best friends and the only one who’d take him in after last summer. Plus it wasn’t the first time he had ‘accidentally forgotten’ to get the groceries. That added on top of the diet she was trying to maintain for boxing meant his blunder today resulted in a pretty fair amount of anger.
Letting out a resigned breath of his own Connor got up and grabbed his coat off the back of the couch. He briefly considered changing into something other than a T-shirt he’s had since high school that barely fit and shorts that should not be worn outside the house but he really wasn’t trying to impress anyone today. So slipping on the worn out windbreaker and jamming his feet into a pair of beat up sneakers was all he did before slipping out of the apartment, only to double back halfway down the hall of his apartment building because he had forgotten several key items. Namely keys, hat, wallet, and the all important cellular device.
With his assortment of essentials gathered and ready to go Connor once more slipped out of the two bedroom apartment. This time he made it to the street without any sudden realizations of miscellaneous objects he would need on his little adventure for foodstuffs and toilet paper.
The city was pretty bright considering it was well past sundown, a fact of both convenience and great annoyance to conner. He enjoyed being able to see where he is going and such but a walk in the dark was always something he enjoyed as a teenager. He and his friends always took long walks over the weekends, just smoking and enjoying the simple things in life. Of course now he didn’t smoke much and life’s simple things were a tad less enjoyable but the nostalgia of it seemed to cover for those things a fair bit. Of course this walk would only be for a couple blocks but again it didn’t really matter.
Connor’s mind drifted as he walked, his hands jammed in his pockets and only the sound of passing cars to remind him of reality. The deeper his mind drifted the more her face started to show up, Laurin. This happened so frequently now that it barely bothered him, at this point it was to be expected. Of course he wished this would end and that he could simply move on but something about her nagged at him whenever he got lost in thought. Maybe it was the loose curls in her blonde hair or the way she chewed her lip when she was lost in thought but he couldn’t get her out of his head.
It was pathetic. Really it was. Connor was the one who broke it off with her, she had hurt him and yet he still thought of her like this. She still haunted him like a delightfully soft nightmare but he knew he’d never let that happen again. There were times where he thought he was insane for still feeling this way about her after almost a year.
A loud and sudden honking from behind him cut those thoughts short, which was admittedly for the best and connor turned around. The car that had been honking was a stark white convertable of some kind. It looked european but Connor couldn’t really tell since he wasn’t much of a car guy. More importantly inside the car were four women, each squealing like children as the blonde in the front seat honks her horn repeatedly at the red light. When the light changes there is a remarkably loud tire squeal and a roar of an engine as the car bolts forwards through the crossing at a fairly unsafe speed. The laughter and shouting of the women fades off in the distance as the car passes and something about the whole scene caused Connor to bust out laughing.
Maybe it was the incredulity of the whole scene and maybe it was the juxtaposition of that against his silly worries and musings. Whatever it was he’d have to thank them for saving him from his own torrent of gloom. He might also have to tack on a thank you about reminding him that he was already where he needed to be he just had to cross the street to the pharmacy. He can’t count the number of times he had absentmindedly walked past whatever destination he was headed for because he was too wrapped up in his own stupid pity party to notice.
After a few scares where he was almost hit by cars, Connor successfully crossed the street and made his way into the small 24 hour convenience store slash pharmacy. After glancing at the signs hanging from the ceiling he made his way to the section labeled ‘groceries and canned goods’ which he noted was an odd description as he figured you could count canned goods as groceries. It only took a few moments to pull up the list Quinn had texted him earlier and gather the things she had wanted and to pick out a few things he wanted as well.
Once all the items were gathered he had a new dilemma. He had a shit ton of things he had to carry all the way home and unlike Quinn he wasn’t a boxer so his arms were going to fall off from the weight of it. Of course he was no going to complain to Quinn or wimp out now, that would be a one way ticket to getting his ass kicked and thrown out. Two things he did not want to happen.
So sucking it up he made his way to the counter and lined up all the stuff on the counter in front of a girl with obviously dyed black hair and really pale skin. Basically if anyone fit the bill as a vampire it would be her. Her smile was obviously enforced as some sort of company policy because it really didn’t fit on her face super well. She didn’t really say anything at first but after looking all of his stuff and bagging it for him she lost the smile and raised an eyebrow with a look that seemed more like her natural resting face.
“Dude didn’t you walk here? You know you can’t steal the shopping car right?” Her voice was pretty monotone but the corner of her mouth twitched and you could tell she found the idea a bit amusing.
“Shit, here i thought you’d be cool and let me take it.” Connor offered a grin, and picked up a couple of the bags in one hand as he prepared to leave. The bags were annoyingly heavy already and in five minutes when he starts walking his arms are going to hate him.
“Nah, i might get the axe for that. I tell you what though, You wait twenty minutes and I can give you a ride home.” This time her smile spread more naturally and she motioned over her shoulder in the general direction of the parking lot.
“Alright, but before you make any moves I’ll have you know I carry a wooden stake at all times.” Connor was thankful for the offer and hoped he could keep their bit of banter going.
“Uh… what? Wait…” Her face went from puzzled to suddenly getting it within seconds and she let out a soft laugh. “Sorry kid, you’ll actually need silver bullets for me. Nice guess though.”
“Shit and here i thought I was safe for once.” Connor took his turn to laugh. “Alright I’ll wait outside, twenty minutes right?”
“Nineteen now, but yeah. Get outta here so I can do my job.” She waved him off nonchalantly and Connor headed for the door only to be stopped short by a voice. “Hey! Wait! I didn’t catch your name stranger!” Her laugh followed the dumb cliched line.
“Oh, right I’m Connor.” He spoke loud enough back that she could catch it easily and he stepped outside. Of course he hadn’t bothered to ask her name because he was busy trying to act smooth but in the end just came off like a character he might write in a poor book idea.
Sitting himself down at the curb he let his eyes run over the four cars that were in the parking lot and tried to guess which one was hers. There was a black SUV in decent shape, a silver convertible that looked to be about twenty years old, a beat up bug painted some dark color like black or blue, and the last one was an orange mustang that had definitely seen better days. Judging by her black nails, dyed black hair, and snow white skin Connor guessed she probably owned either the SUV or the old Bug. Deciding between the two he went with the bug since she worked at a convenience store which he doubted could pay for the relatively nice SUV.
Having made his bets he still had a few minutes before she would follow him out and settle the debate once and for all. In those few minutes Connor did a number of things, all of which were totally interesting and worth noting.
A few flicked pebbles and 74 passing cars later a short petite girl wearing a beanie and boots that clashed with her uniform stepped out of the building. She looked the wrong way first and did a sort of pirouette before spotting Connor sitting in the shade.
“Jeez, and you made fun of me for being a vampire. You know the streetlights aren’t the sun right? You won’t burn.” She grinned and offered a hand to help him up which he accepted.
“True, but I was hoping that if I hid in the shadows you might let slip your true name so I could control you.” This line was a stretch and in hindsight was more than a little cringey, but it got a laugh anyways.
“What am I? A demon or rumpelstiltskin? Neither of those sounds like a compliment though.” She picked up a few of his bags and started towards the silver convertible, which meant he had guessed wrong.
“Well I was hoping to find out. I guess I can settle for the name you’d be wiling to offer me. I can’t just call you cashier girl can I?” Connor loaded his bags into the trunk of the car and slid into the passenger’s seat when prompted.
“I suppose not, but seeing how you missed your chance to ask earlier it might be funny if I withhold the information.” She offered him a grin as she turned the key in the ignition and the car practically wheezed to life.
“That didn’t sound to good. I think the hamsters running your engine are dying.” Again a pretty cringey line but she only shot him a glance before laughing softly. “Yeah ok that was definitely not the best joke. I assume it’s not that unusual a sound though?”
“Yeah, the old thing has sounded the same for about three years. Honestly I’m only a few paychecks away from upgrading to something that runs a little better before this gives out on me.” She shrugged without looking over and kept her eyes steady. “ You didn’t tell me where we were going by the way. I have no clue where you live.”
With a chuckle Connor informed her that it was a straight shot to his apartment and should only take a few minutes. The two of them simply made smalltalk the rest of the way and when she pulled over Connor thanked her and got out.
“Hey, before you go. The Name’s Eve. Friday night I’ll be at the coffee house down the street” She offered him a wink and drove away before he could respond.
With a shrug of his shoulders Connor took his bags of foodstuffs up to their fourth floor apartment halfway up the building. Everything about the last forty minutes had been like something at the start of a goofy romance movie. Right down to the bad lines and how hot she was in comparison to him.
Once he got to the apartment he noticed the door was unlocked and the doorway smelled vaguely of meat and cheese. Burgers.
Inside the apartment the smell was stronger and on the couch was Quinn, sprawled out with a mountain of burgers on the coffee table. As far as Connor knew she was still on a diet so he took pause and opened his mouth to speak before being cut off immediately.
“I got a call while I was in the car.” Her voice sounded very agitated and Connor’s mind instantly cycled through everything he had done in the past week to make sure it wasn’t because of him.
“Um… about what?” Connor was genuinely confused and that carried in his voice.
“Apparently my opponent was caught juicing. So my bout it cancelled.” She paused for a moment. “Well sorta. Apparently I can get a fight scheduled for that same day but I will have to go up an entire weight class. The club needs the win to convince the board for funding so i don’t have alot of choice in this.”
“Ah…” There really wasn’t much else to say. Quinn was dedicated to boxing and as such she would make this work, but he wasn’t sure how. “Um So all of the food I bought?” He ventured the statement as a question.
“It’s fine. Most of that stuff would have lasted longer but I need to boost my calories.” Quinn gritted her teeth a bit before glancing back at Connor. For a moment her face was exactly what he had expected but then her eyebrow shot up. “You met a girl?”
“Wha.. how the hell did you do that?” He was dumbfounded. There was absolutely no way she could have found that out just by looking at him, it was impossible.
“I just havea sense for these things with you. We’ve been friends since High School.” She took a long drink from her giant cup. “So is she cute?”
“Yeah, I’d say she is.” Connor started to get things put away as he spoke, the wall separating the kitchen and the living area serving as a barrier from the embarrassing staring she’d no doubt be doing. “She isn’t actually my type, but we hit it off well enough that i could look past it.”
“My my how noble of you, letting the non-blondes bask in your favour for once.” The sarcasm was so thick that he could practically feel her rolling her eyes in the other room.
“Oh come on that isn’t fair! You do that shit too!” This time it was Connor’s turn to star disapprovingly from the kitchen doorway. “Name one time you dated or had sex with a guy that wasn’t shorter and thinner than you.”
“Puh-lease, that is not the same at all. I’m 6’1” most guys are shorter than me and just because I like skinny guys doesn’t mean i wouldn’t date another… wait shit. Fine you win.” She sighed and took a mouth full of a burger. “Hey by the way you haven’t eaten yet tonight right?” She punctuated the question by tossing Connor a burger. “Go nuts i think if i eat all of these i’ll puke.
Connor rolled his eyes at his overzealous friend and unwrapped the burger befor plopping himself down on her feet. “Thanks Q.”
“Yeah yeah.” She tugged her feet up and moved so that instead of laying on the couch she was sitting with her legs stretched out. They were still close to Connor but at least now he had proper eating room.
The rest of the night was fairly uneventful. Quinn passed out on the couch and Conner cleaned up the wrappers that were thrown around the room at random. After he got everything picked up he dragged a blanket over his friend and headed to his room. Life wasn’t always going to be so boring and simple, he’d learned that as a kid, but right now he wished that every day could end like this. Afterall he didn’t have all that much to worry about and things seemed optimistic for once.
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Hey hey this is my new writing bloggo dealy. It’s basically a collection of things I’ll be writing and have written. Right now I’m just doing a backlog of things I have written in the last 6 months or so. Please follow if you are at all interested or if you just want to take pity on a writer!
Wrltlng Backiog #8
Not much to say about this one. It’s framed as a sort of nostalgia piece about some kids doing some stupid stuff lol. I hope you can enjoy this! _________________________________________________________
I always used to come by this riverbank as a kid. It was calming to me, to watch the fish float by in the little lull where I used to play. The water was fast further down the stream and my parents always told me that it was really dangerous to actually swim in the water here but I don’t think I ever actually listened to them if they weren’t watching me. I can’t count the number of times I’ve swam across the river and back in the dead of night with my friends from school. Of course We weren’t very safe about it, often jumping in off the banks further up river and catching each other when we made it to the lull. Of course nobody ever got hurt so we figured it was all good fun. Our parents tried to scare us away by claiming that a river troll lived at the end of the river and ate children who got swept downstream, but there was no way that was true so we just ignored them. One day in the middle of summer, Rachel and Harry thought it’d be fun to take the raft we made further down stream and check it out to see if the troll was real or not. I didn’t think it was that good of an idea but they seemed to be into it so I went along with them. There were four of us in all Harry and Rachel who were twin brother and sister, Annabelle my neighbor, and me. We packed a lunchbox, flashlights, a waterproof radio, and Harry stole his dad’s fishing knife. With all of our supplies ready we leaded up onto the crudely made raft, which surprisingly held up really well and we headed down river in the dead of night. Needless to say it wasn’t a very good idea at all, after the first few hours we were completely lost. The town where we lived was pretty far behind us and the river was picking up speed. Our raft was put together when we were in second grade, and being in middle school now meant it was surprising the thing still floated at all. On top of all of that we had begun to hear strange moaning sounds coming from the banks of the river and began fearing that our parents were right about the troll. Harry tried to assure us that with the knife he’d be able to protect us but that promise was short lived when we hit a rock and he dropped the knife into the river. By the time the sun came up the four of us were crowded in the middle of the raft and passed out from lack of sleep. We woke up at the base of the river with police officers helping us out of the water and asking us for our phone numbers. After a few hours we were all picked up by my mom and we drove home in silence. We didn’t even eat the food we brought. Annabelle moved out of state after that summer and the twins were sent to a boarding school that was year round after their parents divorce. I’m the only one left now. Sometimes I go out and sit on the bank of the river at night and shake my head at how stupid we were. The rapids could have killed us. I’m glad we did it though, it’s sort of a testament to the passing of our youth. I’m Twenty-Two now and I can say pretty confidently that I don’t regret our last voyage. After all, youth is fleeting so why waste it.
#Writing#Author#Self promo#I'm a dork please support my things#some of it is good I promise#this one is pretty decent#Nostalgia piece#Please love me
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Please support their Indiegogo! Failing Upward is a super cool animation project about two young adults and their daily lives as told through conversations they have with each other on the phone. I think it is a super neat idea and I’d love to see them funded! Link: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/failing-upward-animated-series-half-of-season-1-cartoon-animation--2#/
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WE PASSED 20% IN FOUR DAYS! KEEP IT GOING STRONG, GUYS AND THANK YOU!
#Indiegogo#Failing Upward#Failingupward#Failing#Upward#Cartton#animation#neat#phone#cool#ummm#im bad with tags#please support#JC is like super cute#Indie#pls i cry
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I loved Becky Prim’s Pilot thingy it’s super funny. I really hope everything works out for it!
Congrats to @karlhadrika for #BeckyPrim getting 300,000+ views on youtube!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcchrgJgryo
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That isn’t chubby, that cat is overweight. Cats should be able to squeeze themselves through basically anything their heads fit through. My mother is a veterinarian and she’d be the first to tell you that if you car about your cat you’d get them on a diet conducive to their health. Like most carnivores cats and dogs will eat basically any time food is available (there are exceptions of course) because in nature it is likely that there will be times when they don’t have extra food.Their bodies build fat reserves in order to offset the loss of calories later on. However an excess of fat cells can cause issues for animals of any type, and we all want our animals to live long happy lives while they can. I know this was meant as a “lol funny fat cat” thing but it’s important to understand that preserving the health of your pets is up to the owner.
#Pets#Health#Cats#Overweight#thoughts#sorry this doesn't fit in well#basically only porn blogs follow me anyways#so nobody who cares will see this
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Good gods man, if all chefs were that powerful they’d run the world.
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Actually, I think this may be the best part of the evilicious finale.
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I am 19, My name is Alex... and I have a receding hairline. (many tears have been shed)
hello friends i am balding
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Kirby with a nose is my favorite. So i took some time and i arted it up to produce my magnum opus
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No it isn’t, like at all. C’mon people fact check at least a little.
Clancy Brown - Mr. Krabs
Darin De Paul - Reinhardt
I dunno who thought that they’d misinform people but why make up a lie?
THE SAME FUCKING VOICE ACTOR FOR REINHARDT
IS THE SAME FUCKING VOICE ACTOR
FOR MR. KRABS.
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Reminds me of Game Grumps sad Hoshi.



うわあ、なんだか凄いことになっちゃったぞ by zezest (@zezest2)
#game grumps#Danny#Danny sexbang#arin hanson#GG#egoraptor#sad hoshi#sad#hoshi#Godzilla#art#good art#japan
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Lmao only thing you should be ashamed about is killing tracer ya goober, she can’t take off the thing she wears on her chest. In all seriousness artists should feel free to express themselves how they wish. It doesn’t matter if you agree with it, or if you want to see it quite frankly. Freedom of speech is a fundamental right all human beings hold, and that right covers art as well. So quite frankly, fuck you guys and use a NSFW filter yah dinguses.
I’m gettin’ shamed for drawing overwatch porn. It finally happened. (Turn on your NSFW lock, you silly bean.)
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