lirillith

[lirillith]

[lirillith]

Finally figured out how to permanently disable google assistant on phone

[lirillith]

i think we should be talking about the semi-recent advancements in cystic fibrosis treatment like all the time every day. there hasn’t been a drug like this since AZT medications for HIV infection it is truly fucking miraculous and very important

[lirillith]

We just got new phones and now all the emojis in my texts are ANIMATED. this is the worst thing that has ever happened in the history of humankind and I am ready to go live in the woods in a hut and forage for my food. The future is HORRIBLE.

[lirillith]

Downside of collecting Pokémon plushies is that every single time I get a new delivery, I have to explain to my parents (who don't know jackshit about Pokémon) what my new little adorable freakchild is and sometimes I end up looking like:

Because my taste in Pokémon is cute critters, most of the time I can get away with just saying "It's a cat/bird/dog/fox etc" and they'll except it, but sometimes if the Pokémon is more... unconventional, it gets a bigger, (mostly "What the fuck?") reaction.

Examples:

Unfortunately Raichu is one of the few Pokémon my dad DOES know (because he watched the Lieutenant Surge episode of the anime sometime when it first aired) and I'm mentally preparing to explain the concept of Regional Variants to him to explain why this Raichu is sitting on its tail.

My mum was like "Sweet jesus what is that thing?!" I just went "Oh it's just a cute arctic fox :)" and deliberately omitted the part where it's literally a ghost reborn from pure malice

My dad thinks these are terrifying.

My mother thinks these are terrifying

My mother misheard me and thought this one was called "Lardy Ass"

"Is it a peacock?"

Definitely the most positive reaction I've ever gotten. My mum's face lit up.

To quote my dad:

"Of all the doofy things you order, this is the best one."

*when he showed it to my mum that evening* "Did you see [my name's] ball seal? Isn't he just the best? :D"

[lirillith]

do you know? do you know? the new pope has been revealed..

art by chiho saito!

[lirillith]

One of the machines broke down at the hyperbole factory. The situation is frustrating, but ultimately manageable.

[lirillith]

You're about to close on your very own, suspiciously affordable and comfortable house. Just before you sign the contract, the realtor shows you the required legal disclosure: your new house is haunted by the type of presence you'll get from this spinner wheel.

Of course it is.

[lirillith]

abandonware should be public domain. force companies to actively support and provide products if they don't wanna lose the rights to them

[lirillith]

The Magician and The Hierophant

Today's most popular trick is to make an important religious figure disappear.

[lirillith]

"wow ur so good at math" ah ha but you see. you dont ever get good at math. you stay bad, but now youre bad at harder math

[lirillith]

Requested by anon

[lirillith]

Matzo Ball Soup and Challah - Jewish Food for The Sims 2

These are conversions from Sims 4, low poly. Matzo Soup is available at lunch and dinner time, same Chili cooking skill required. Challah is a dessert, available anytime, 3 cooking skill points required. Invisible plate is required for the Challah (included).

DOWNLOAD HERE

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[lirillith]

[lirillith]

attention this is your captain speaking chag sameach pesach to all celebrating and a reminder do not open the airlock to greet elijah the vulcan rabbinic council ruled that opening the door to the room where the seder is occurring is sufficient elijah can get on a starship just fine himself he just likes to be personally invited in to your seder we dont need another incident like last year thank you