liveyourlastbreath - Tumblr blog

liveyourlastbreath · 2 months ago

Note

Lighthouse

Shamelessly sliding my own into here as well

Jeremy and Jean fics where Jeremey is the one going through it? I can never find ANYTHING about him or surrounding his angst.

You guys r awesome TY

Most angsty stories and art focusing on Jeremy and Jean stay true to their canonical role types: sunny vs dark.

But now we have a sequel series, and The Sunshine Court books reveal unvarnished and often painful bits of Jeremy’s reality. So, you will be seeing much more fandom content with Jeremy angst (and healing) as his character works through things with Jean and his found family.

We do have a few previous and new-to-the blog recs for pre-TSC-series Jeremy angst, and I’ve noted where spoilers begin later in the post. However, if you really want to feel this boy’s pain, it may be time to pick up the new books. - A

pre-tsc previous recs:

Jeremy hurt/comfort (with ‘caught by a low moon’ and more) here

‘Sixteen Hours’ here

‘Play Pretend with Me’ here

‘Change in scenery’ here

‘thick skin, an elastic heart’ here

‘The House of the Rising Sun’ here

‘Tell me where it hurts most’ here (kerejean)

Remarquer by bazerella [Not Rated, 2460 Words, Complete, 2020]

“Ever since I got here, I’ve been waiting for you to break,” Jean admitted. “I waited for someone to fuck up at practice, for you to grow impatient with how long it was taking me to warm up to the team, for something, anything really, to push you over the edge. It never happened. If anything, the more things didn’t go your way, the happier you got.” --- Or: Jeremy is tense, Jean helps.

tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: anxiety

my intuition is telling me there'll be better days by kbirb [Rated G, 694 Words, Complete, 2021]

In which Jeremy has a lot of anxiety about the passage of time, especially once it means less with Jean.

tw: anxiety

Can you drown my demons? by a_writing_stranger [Not Rated, 1142 Words, Complete, 2021]

Jeremy has a fight with Alvarez and they say some hurtful shit. Jeremy locks himself and Jean comes to help him out of the black hole.

transferable skills decaflondonfog [Rated E, 11111 Words, Complete, AFTG Then and Now 2023]

It’s the way Jean watches his own hands as he guides the thread through the paper, pulling the gathering tight to the spine. It’s the way Jean bends, strong and handsome, over a tiny embroidery hoop to get the details exactly right. Jeremy Knox is supposed to be spending his senior year worrying about what comes next. Instead, he’s mesmerized as he watches each stitch come to life and finds, there in between the threads, something completely unexpected.

tw: negative self image, tw: explicit sexual content

I Can't Give You Forever (So I'll Give You Myself Instead) by NikNak22 [Rated M, 1702 Words, Complete, JereJean Appreciation Week 2021]

Day 02 : Nightmare/Panic attack/Flashback Jean is woken in the middle of the night by Jeremy having a nightmare. As he tries to comfort him, he mulls over their past and the uncertainty of their future together. For what answer can he give to an ending he can't see?

tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: nightmares

Murmurs Like Knives by thearoacewriter [Rated G, 839 Words, Complete, JereJean Appreciation Week 2021]

jean helps jeremy through his sensory overload

tw: sensory overload, tw: internalized ableism

Of cancelled flights and lazy Christmases by EbbaTriesToWrite [Rated G, 1578 Words, Complete, 2022]

Jean was just settling down on his bed with his laptop in his lap, the opening credits of Love Actually rolling, when he heard a knock at his door. He frowned in confusion as he paused the movie and padded over to his door, he was sure everyone had left already, Christmas was in two days after all. He opened the door and was met by the sight of Jeremy staring up at him with red-rimmed eyes and a pout on his lips, “Wha-” “My flight got cancelled.” Jeremy interrupted Jean’s question and promptly burst into tears, throwing himself forward, letting his suitcase fall to the floor in favour of wrapping his arms around Jean.

Sorta Kinda Perfect by justadreamfox [Rated T, 13075 Words, Complete, 2021]

Two years after the crash that took his mom’s life and half the cartilage in his knee, Jeremy Knox finds himself on a new professional team on the other side of the country, courtesy of one (1) Kevin Day. Jeremy and Kevin have known each other for years, their lives entangled in innumerable ways, but for the first time the Golden Boy and the Son of Exy are stepping onto the court side by side - leaving Jeremy scrambling to figure out where he fits in his new life, and why, exactly, he wants to stand so close to Kevin.

there is no choice by saturnwaves [Rated T, 2756 Words, Complete, 2023, Locked]

Jean watches as Jeremy falls back asleep, a furrow firmly between his brows. He brushes the furrow away, throat tight, and eyes stinging with tears he can’t shed. The thing about Jean is he doesn’t like to argue. He doesn’t like to fight. He fought enough for the majority of his teens. Most of the time Jeremy and him communicate really well. If one of them upsets each other then they talk it through. But this… Jean’s not sure he can talk through it with this particular argument.

Time of fear by LadyTimelessness [Rated T, 2670 Words, Complete, 2023]

Moriyama grins contentedly at the camera, clearly pointedly bypassing the bed. Jean remembers all his manipulative tricks. Riko knows where to push to make it hurt, — mentally or physically, it doesn't matter. Jean can almost feel Jeremy sniffing the air as Riko's palm buries itself in his golden hair.

tw: kidnapping, tw: abuse, tw: psychological abuse, tw: noncon kiss, tw: violence, tw: blood, tw: murder, tw: canonical character death

You are my sunshine by orphan_account [Rated G, 1433 Words, Complete, 2021]

Jeremy has a cold and he is very sleepy

I don't need to say it to tell you I love you by orphan_account [Rated T, 2254 Words, Complete, 2019]

Three times Jean and Jeremy share a bed. Not the only three times, just three times that seem important. Ft. Jean's nightmares and Jeremy's help, with a side of Jeremy's insomnia and self-deprecation. None of it is solved, but it sure helps to have the other to get through it.

tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: nightmares, tw: insomnia

🚨 tsc series spoilers from here forward:

I know the end by Zombiecowboy65 [Not Rated, 15883 Words, Incomplete, Updated May 2025]

The first time it happens, Jeremy isn't alone. Or, even the sun will burn out eventually

tw: anxiety, tw: car accidents, tw: nightmares, tw: emotional abuse, tw: implied/referenced suicide, tw: negative self image, tw: sex as self harm, tw: insomnia

healed everything but my shame by iz_anxiously [Rated M, 48937 Words, Incomplete, Updated May 2025, Locked]

When a video from Jeremy's freshman banquet is leaked and a new scandal breaks out, Jeremy has to contend with an escalating turn of events and tragedies, his family's daunting expectations and his own uncertain future. Will his friends be enough to save him when Jeremy's whole world crumbles to dust around him?

tw: public shaming, tw: suicidal ideation, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction, tw: involuntary outing, tw: homophobia, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: internalized victim blaming, tw: sexual assault, tw: emotional abuse, tw: toxic family dynamics, tw: excessive force, tw: threatened conversion camp, tw: dissociation, tw: panic attacks

we can't make any promises by icedcoffeebro [Rated M, 32218 Words, Incomplete, Updated May 2025]

Jean greatly dislikes Jeremy not being fully Jeremy. That includes him coming to him smelling of other men. It evolves into something that's going to perhaps drive Jeremy insane; an arrangement the two men don't discuss.

tw: homophobia, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: toxic family dynamics, tw: emotional abuse

The Color of Letting Go bySuckITJosten [Rated G, 1698 Words, Complete, 2025, Locked]

CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE GOLDEN RAVEN!!!! Jeremy Knox sees his brother's face looking back at him in the mirror. Jean comforts him after he has a breakdown over it.

tw: implied/referenced suicide

Secret Languages by Rederiss [Rated M, 10230 Words, Complete, 2025]

Jeremy Knox has been seeing Leo Foster on the down low. Keeping it proves difficult when Jeremy is becoming more and more exhausted by the day. What will happen if people find out about this fling?

tw: unhealthy relationships, tw: negative self image, tw: sex as self harm, tw: violence

You'll pull through by centaurdreaming [Rated G, 4166 Words, Incomplete, Updated Apr 2024, Locked]

At 05:47, a street-side camera catches the moment a stolen Mercedes sprinter smashes into a white Lexus at 50mph, sending the small car and its driver barrelling out of view. --Jeremy knows it can't go on. He knows he'll pay for it one day, but when that day actually comes will he have the time to stop and think about what it'll mean for the people who love him?

tw: distracted driving, tw: car accident

lines crossed by niixna [Rated M, 13439 Words, Incomplete, Updated Apr 2025]

Jeremy has to make a choice between the family that doesn’t want him or start living for a family that does. For Jean Moreau? He will always choose Jeremy. Every time.

tw: emotional abuse, tw: toxic family dynamics, tw: implied/referenced suicide, tw: homophobia, tw: bullying, tw: violence

here, on the hotel bathroom floor by livlikesrocks [Not Rated, 1370 Words, Complete, 2025]

he feels the cool touch of a palm against his cheek. maybe, he thinks, you could save me from myself or; Jeremy knows better than to think himself worthy of the life he has been given. Jean disagrees.

tw: unhealthy relationships, tw: negative self image

something akin to a flame by Chishiy4 [Rated T, 6480 Words, Incomplete, Updated Apr 2025]

USC Trojan’s vs Edgar Allen Ravens. Jeremy is determined to win and will do anything to secure the victory. Even if that means putting himself in danger and exceeding his physical capabilities. Jean has proved himself to the trojan’s, time and time again, this game, his main priority is ensuring that a certain blonde stays safe and doesn’t push too far.

tw: bullying, tw: implied/referenced suicide, tw: violence

The Urge to Need You by Smitten03 [Not Rated, 783 Words, Complete, 2025]

Jean's focus only wavers at the feeling of a hand on his lower back, completely freezing when two arms slowly wrap around his torso, hugging him as soft sniffles are heard over the rushing water. Jeremy had a really tough day, but Jean is all the comfort he needs.

the death of the party (came as no surprise) by halfaperson [Rated M, 5040 Words, Incomplete, Updated Apr 2025, Locked]

When Jeremy Knox was young, before the world had taken shape in front of him as the complicated knot of pain and horror and ever-present anxiety he now tried hard to fight with a winning smile, his moniker really had been accurate. He had been the golden boy in every sense of the word. He’d been happy, loved, not perfect but charmingly close to it.

tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction, tw: emotional abuse, tw: vomit

Art House by sun_monsterz [Rated E, 10230 Words, Complete, 2025]

When Jeremy returns to their hotel room after hooking up with Faser, he’s bordering on an anxious break. Jean suggests he take a bath to relax, helping him destress while asking about Jeremy’s past. Their feelings for each other become harder to suppress as the night goes on, and worn down by the weight of his mistakes, Jeremy stops denying what a good thing him and Jean and their love could be.

tw: anxiety, tw: implied/referenced drug use, tw: implied/referenced suicide, tw: negative self image, tw: sex as self harm, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon

A Super Comprehensive, Totally Foolproof, Really Effective Step-By-Step Guide on How to Appear Normal by Jeremy Knox by neiljokesten (vykio) [Rated T, 15471 Words, Complete, AFTG Mixtape Exchange 2025]

It’s fine. Jeremy Knox is not going through anything, actually. But if you were going through it, and you wanted to handle it the way Jeremy would, here’s the advice he’d give you: Avoid ever thinking about your problems (try to do this successfully) Angst in bathrooms, not in public Show everyone you’re fine by doing things almost exactly as you would normally Lie about it until the lie becomes true enough (try to do this successfully)

tw: implied/referenced sex as self harm

yours is the only voice I would wake to fic by @centaur-dreaming [Tumblr, 2025]

obsessed with the way nora wrote jeremy meta by @joejhang [Tumblr, 2025]

i love every you jeremy meta by @joejhang [Tumblr, 2025]

Jeremy family drama in TGR meta by @ninyard [Tumblr, 2025]

Jeremy’s self punishment meta by @cleansound [Tumblr, 2025]

His guilt haunts me meta by @zombiecowboy65 [Tumblr, 2025]

Jeremy has a dissociation problem and Jeremy Knox, do you realize? meta by @rederiss [Tumblr, 2025]

Thinking about how Jeremy must have felt in rehab… hc by @wherethemothsgrow [Tumblr, 2025]

🚨 Art

my sun art by @pepeshka

the moon & the sun art by @j0anko