I just heard this woman say “you procrastinate because you are afraid of rejection. It’s a defense mechanism, you are trying to protect yourself without even trying.” and I think I just realized what was wrong with me.
Unlearning problematic things takes time. So much is ingrained in us that we’re completely unaware of. Personal growth is a lengthy process that doesn’t have a defined end date. You’re not going to wake up and be “perfectly conscious” and never screw up. Every day you have to work at your consciousness. So try not to be so hard on yourself. When someone calls you out, try to remember that it’s ultimately for your benefit. Even though the experience can be embarrassing and painful. That person believes you can do better and you can. It’s not easy by a long shot, but it’s worth it.