lunarwriting - Tumblr blog

[lunarwriting]

@cheezbot 

Ray-Ban Sunglasses

[lunarwriting]

@cheezbot 

Ray-Ban Sunglasses

[lunarwriting]

writing about the way you feel when you are in love feels like you are growing flowers for everyone to see. the way your heart seems to fill the pages, how it feels like you are creating spring, how writing something for someone to see feels like you are naked with clothes on, how vulnerable it feels to give someone your soul to judge. or how writing something for someone for you, not for them, feels like you are holding a secret that can bloom.

writing about the way you feel when you are heartbroken feels like releasing the weight of the world into something only you can understand. taking your pain and creating it into art feels like this pain can finally mean something, it feels as a release of pain, of the worst kind of pain, can remind you that something can grow from hurt.

reading something that you wrote for the person you love makes you feel unrecognizable, like the person you were is now just a ghost, a stranger. remembering who you were one year ago, two years ago, three years ago, can teach you more than the present can. 

[lunarwriting]

the moon goes in phases, and so do i. I know. I know this. I know the moon has a dark side and a light side and so do I. I know this. But somehow, every time I feel the sinking feeling that comes with the beginning of my long-term friend, I become unreasonably angry with myself. it is always me that I blame, and apologies roll of my tongue far easier than I wish they would. The moon doesn’t punish herself no matter what phase she is in, she doesn’t apologize. I aim to be more like this.

the moon goes through phases, and so do I. I know. And when I look out the window and I notice her crescent, i know that it is only shadows and though the moon looks like she is small, it is only the shadows distracting us from seeing reality. And though I understand this, I can’t convince myself that I am the say way. Through my shadows, I recognize myself as incomplete, but I am whole. I’ve always been whole, no matter what phase I’m in.

the colder it gets, the sadder I am. The darker it becomes, the more isolated I become. The worst part of my depression hits me in the happiest time of the year, right before Christmas, and it is the loneliest feeling in the entire world. The worse I feel, the meaner I am to myself. I am forever wishing for more kindness to give to myself.

I aim to be more like the moon, who goes through phases, who has a light side and a dark side of her, but still shines throughout the dark no matter what.