madds444

[madds444]

for some reason i couldn’t post until today, but thank god.

day 12: i normally have a bag of popcorn and I’ll have cucumber turkey boats. since ive been on my period this week ive been eating a bit more but im working on fighting those urges.

[madds444]

very bloated today from being on my period (i definitely am extra bloated tonight as i did end up eating way more than planned and had drinks, but im cutting some slack since i only get a period once every 4 months and it’s been painful and food has been the only thing to help the pain and cramps). i plan to get back to eating less and healthier this week, even if im in pain

[madds444]

day 10: probably my kindness. ever since ive been restricting (and binging which leads to more restricting and self hatred) ive been deflecting my personal feelings about myself onto everyone around me. ive isolated and been snappy. im moody, and instead of being the normal kind and loving person i am, i find my inner voice constantly not only bringing myself, but others, down. when i see someone eating all i can think is that they are going to be f@t, but i know it’s just because deep down im jealous i cant be carefree and actually enjoy eating anymore

[madds444]

just another day waking up f@t :/

[madds444]

manifesting losing 35 pounds overnight🙏🙏🙏

[madds444]

so mad at myself. i started my period and can’t control it. im so hungry. and so bloated.

[madds444]

ㅤ15 Reasons To... ㅤ Lose Weight!

BEING DESCRIBED AS "the skinny one"

getting complimented

"how'd you lose weight so fast?"

hipbones showing

cheekbones showing

thin thighs

small waist

thin arms

being tiny next to people

being in control

being able to say "yeah I lost ... pounds"

being tiny even in XS clothes

"oh my god you're so tiny!"

"you look so different"

people following you on tumblr/twitter just because you're skinny and they wanna be near you

[madds444]

having an 3d is literally just waiting 24/7

- waiting to w3igh in

- waiting for your next meal / when you can eat

- waiting for ppl to notice your wl

- waiting for the mirror to change

- waiting for the "special number"

waiting waiting waiting . . . it sucks.

[madds444]

day 9: yes. my whole life. i remember being called chunky/chubby as a kid, and when i became a teenager everyone at school would pick on me for gaining so much weight (i was like 10lbs away from being 200). now it’s not really my weight that is commented on, but my eating habits. people will pick on me for having a big appetite, or making comments like “wow that would last me like three days”. i remember their words and can’t wait to prove them wrong.

[madds444]

im going to start doing progress pics to motivate me to eat less and let @na guide me

pls give me tips and even mean$po atp i need anything to help me stop being such a f@t pig

[madds444]

does anyone else feel like they're shit at having ana

[madds444]

I deserve to be skinny.

[madds444]

day 8: honestly i dont have one. i work at a pharmacy so im on my feet and running around 3-5 days of the week 8-11 hrs. i try to get movement in on my days off but it can definitely get hard with my depression. most of the time its a battle to even get up to use the bathroom on my days off because im just so depressed. but i want to start hiking and forcing myself to be active like walking or swimming more before the summer ends

[madds444]

I'm trying to ⭐️ve myself gradually but idk how to get back into the right mindset and have enough motivation to forget about eating because I ❤️ food, which is ovbs a downside as I don't wanna look like a f@t p1g for the rest of my life :/

Any tips would be much appreciated~ xoxo

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[madds444]

[madds444]

I feel like people should understand that not every person with an ed is always underweight or even at a normal weight. People with ed's are all shapes and sizes and still suffering

[madds444]