maemyung - Tumblr blog

[maemyung]

just clocked it in this moment that people who try to excuse toxic behaviour/ have a morbid saviour complex, never ever ever had ur best interest!

psa to myself - read that again!

[maemyung]

my trauma didn’t raise no bitch :)

[maemyung]

Star Shopping!

[maemyung]

Don't Wanna Fall in Love - KYLE

[maemyung]

SISTER/NATION - BROCKHAMPTON

[maemyung]

4r da Squaw - Isaiah Rashad

[maemyung]

tienes el amor - mae

[maemyung]

heaven sighs from above - amourmae

if you’re reading this please follow on ig

[maemyung]

smudged lipstick

guys follow my instagram if you’re seeing this!

[maemyung]

Megan Neville, “The Night My Father Died, I Almost Believed in God”

[maemyung]

1. maybe after all, i might not know everything about love. what is love anyways? the love I feel is inexistent i tried to love the way men do, so invasively, easily, but do they ever really? is it that i do and i don’t when it only comes to the thought of you in my mind? so quick and i, unprepared. what is your new life like? this morning. I slowly made of you curiosity, a black cat that slowly gaits and scratches the dark walls of your throat and makes of agony the muscles under your skin, you’re nothing but home for my hunting soul to sleep, a certain feeling that runs deep / familiarity and all you want to do is shriek.

2. the next morning / the second day / at your awakening / is it possible for you to sleep for this long my love? while you did / i built you a home / for you, for me / a townhouse six bedrooms with rooms full of nothing but my underlined misery, with nothing but uncertainty, parts of me tucked beneath the wallpaper they breathe so quietly and when the house shakes it’s almost impossible to hear their screams. i built a townhouse for the love i thought we could manage to keep, let run deep.

3. i have seen you in different colours. i’ve turned you from purple to deep acquarine, marine, a weird finger-tingling-feeling, all i wanted was nothing but for you to kill me, drown me in the sickish-blue i had made of you, yet that day a man cooked for me, afternoon skin thicker than the morning before. look at what inspires me. lithromantic late bloomer. you still don’t understand you were red to me the the night in between yesterday and today.

4. maybe after all i might not know everything about love. i wanted to keep vhs cassettes of us just like my parents did but what do i know about love? i wanted to record nothing else but your pretty face, now that I’m playing unrealistic memories of your smile, what do i know about how to hold onto love? your voice tries to speak and I don’t know exactly what you’re saying behind that camera, i want to use my frontal lobe but what do i know about words? what is love anyways? after a while the cassettes stopped working in my mind, untreated and i don’t get to choose which memories of you to keep, i sigh and forget your face the words you say, full storage and not enough space, all that’s left for me is your name.

5. (Pls there’s so much to write I— anyways keep on reading :D) you must really love me. i asked you if you had eaten that morning and it was just as easy for me to know that i couldn’t love myself, be in union with my highest self, enough for me to even care about another of myself. we were too alike and i don’t know what to do with myself. talking to you was like talking to a mirror / i chewed, raw bleeding gum of the pieces of glass reflecting the agony stuck underneath my teeth, my rotting knees. there’s something in my goddamn room, eyes gliding left and right, aren’t you gone /you still remain in a forever-unity with the walls around me.

Discussion 8/7/21

1. What is your new life like 2. Townhouse 3. Late bloomer 4. VHS 5. Union

[maemyung]

I care about you

im not someone people can care about <3

[maemyung]

every forgiven daughter- mae

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[maemyung]

rotting poetry (this is she) -mae

[maemyung]

am i really happy?

am i? and if I’m not what do I do? what do I do?

[maemyung]

Richard Siken - Crush