middleagedmary

[middleagedmary]

She.

Delicacy is one of the most desired traits in a Club Girl. Delicacy, femininity, classiness, healthiness, and elegance are the five most important things that clubs want in their exec level girls. The Eastern European and Russian girls that work on the exec levels at the different clubs I know all have ballet backgrounds, they all wear makeup and look a certain way, they're all very precise and have control over their lives, they all dress properly, they speak with soft and gentle voices, and they end up marrying rich. I've spent my entire club career emulating them. I'll refer to them as She because they're so lovely and refined that they're an entirely different class of girl that I've completely idealized.

Delicacy.

She has a strict gym routine and she takes care of her body. She works out, she constantly takes barre and ballet classes, she listens to classical music, she stands with ballet arms, she has perfect posture, she is thin but healthy and was healthy about the way that she became thin, she is mentally strong and in therapy, and she presents herself as a delicate gift wrapped in chiffon and tied with ribbons but she is strong, she knows how to survive heartbreak and rejection easily and she knows how to keep going.

She is not weak and she is never a damsel in distress. She knows that if the man she's giving her time will not give her the thing that she wants, she can easily find another man who will worship and kiss the very ground she walks upon. She presents herself as someone who can and should be cherished and cared but she's capable of doing that for herself because she knows she deserves love and nothing is more satisfying that loving herself. She probably drinks and does coke occasionally but she considers it self care and, babe, it's organic and girls need fun.

Femininity.

She has long flowing hair, she knows how to do her makeup with a soft but firm hand, she knows how to apply first her lip liner, then her lipstick, and then her lip gloss, she knows how to handle her liquid eyeliner to make a fake birthmark, she knows how to add soft shimmer to her eyelids to show her youth, she knows to always have a soft color on her nails, she knows that long lashes and wide open eyes always do the trick, and she knows how to apply just enough blush to add to her alluring femininity. She is a woman and she knows how to flaunt her beauty to the men who admire her and make them obsessed with a glance.

She speaks with a soft and gentle voice. She shows expression through her eyes at all times and gasps at all of the right moments, she knows how to lean in and pout her lips at the proper time, she knows how to place strands of her hair behind her ear and look up at the man she's with through her eyelashes, she knows how to gently toss her hair behind her shoulders and waft a gentle breeze of her perfume towards the man she's speaking to. She knows that she is the epitome of femininity and she uses all she has to benefit herself and ensure her success. She is charming but calculating, she knows her desires.

Classiness.

She knows how to dress herself and choose jewelry. At the start of her club days, she wore black and fully accepted her role as new and young, now that she's experienced, she prefers soft pinks, pearls, delicate jewelry, and delicate high heels. She is marriage minded and so she dresses in a way that will impress marriage minded men. She sometimes arrives to her club wearing fresh clothes from ballet and sits at the front desk doing her greeting and check ins, standing to kiss every one of her men on his cheek and enquire after how his day at his office was.

She knows how to choose and pour wine expertly, she knows how to dance for him, elongate her neck and glide towards him, how to bring all of her sensuality and sultriness into the smallest of motions and gestures, she knows how to stretch her leg out in front of her and bend forward just enough to show a slip of skin as she serves him a drink, she knows his favorite beverages and meals, and she knows that when he leaves the club, he'll be returning home to his $30 million home and thinking of her all night. She is pure classiness and she knows that he cannot get her out of his head once she's entered it.

Healthiness.

Her skin glows with health and she's hydrated, she stretches and elongates her neck to correct her posture, she stands with her breasts just barely pushed out and her arms at her sides, she walks gently and knows how to show off her body as she walks. She's poised, perfect, beautiful, and self aware, she knows that there's no one like her and so she makes sure that she's at her best everyday before she leaves her house because she would never allow anyone to glimpse her at less than the best. She takes immense pride in her beauty and appearance and strictly maintains them.

She drinks fresh fruit and veggie juices, she sucks on ice cubes, she eats healthily but has a cheat day once in a blue moon, she has a vibrator in her drawer because she's sexually healthy, she does yoga and meditates, listens to subliminals, goes on healthy walks in the fresh air, takes care of her hair, dry brushes and oils her body until it glows, and she keeps herself at peak physical and mental health. She knows that if her health is perfect, she will not fail, only success will hurry towards her.

Elegance.

Diamond earrings, quality makeup, designer purses, whitened teeth, plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures, facials and eyebrow threading, Brazilian waxes, gentle perfume, Brazilian and Dominican blowouts, keratin treatments, acrylic nails with gel nail polish, a fur coat once in a while, fitted and tailored clothes, the ability to glide in heels, and dark hair make up dark she is. She had a blonde phase but realized that the bleach and the box didn't suit her, she prefers to show off the fact that she can easily be a bombshell, she doesn't need to adhere to a standard of beauty that doesn't suit her, she prefers the timeless elegance that she knows does.

She makes animated conversation and lets the men surrounding her know that she knows that she's worth it, she flirts unashamedly and with utter passion, she wears lingerie that she can slip and shimmy out of at the end of the night, she's coy and glamorous, and she's sexual without being overtly sexual, she still holds her dress down as she enters and exits cars. She is the image of what she believes a woman should be and men love and idealize her for that, she knows she's wanted, she knows she's an it girl, and she knows that she will always win because there's no game, she's in it to win it and she has no fucking competition.

XOXO,

Renata.

[middleagedmary]

18. keep the promises that you make to yourself, always

summer glow up

1. sleep well. everything begins here. you’ll look better, you’ll feel better and you’ll function better.

2. make exercising and stretching a daily ritual. not just for the sake of getting a hotter body but also to feel better and have a stronger body so that you are better prepared  to handle the obstacles that you might face. take a karate lesson, do yoga or run.

3.nourish your body with fresh foods. freshly picked fruits and vegetabled, lots of water.

4.create a skincare routine and follow it religiously. it doesn’t have to be fancy. rose water, honey, clay and oils.

5.protect your self from the sun. wear spf and cover up when you need to. it’s harmful for the health and the skin.

6.swim in the sea. the salt water does wonders for the skin.

7.love your hair and protect it. try to limit heat styling, apply masks, oil your roots and massage your scalp. use apricot oil, castor oil, jojoba oil.

8.take a break from life. watch the films you’ve had on yur watchlist forever, read the books you’ve always wanted to, play the sims…it’s very important to make time for leisure.

9.drink berry smoothies

10.take cold baths with green tea and rose petals

11. soak your feet in vinegar.

12.clean your space naturally. use vinegar with water and essential oils or buy natural cleaning products. its better than those toxic chemicals that harm your skin, hormones and lungs.

13.cutt off toxic people. start over, begin a new chapter in your life with people who only appreciate, love and support you. fake friends and two faced familt members are not to be tolerated ever again.

14. organize your life. start a bullet journal, habit tracker, planner.

15.be clear about your goals and put all the effort you have in fulfilling them.

16. take your pleasures seriously. indulge, enjoy,be wild every now and then.

17. always do what you love  

[middleagedmary]

mariamadiallo_ via instagram

[middleagedmary]

Operation Create Structure: An Experiment in Creating Routines for a Person that Hates Routines

Operation Create Structure: An Experiment in Creating Routines for a Person that Hates Routines

So, if you read my last blog you know that I am coming off of a two-week vacation which was both relaxing and productive. You’ll also know that I discovered how much better my days went with a little more structure. I’m actually pretty blown away with how much better I looked and felt simply by employing a loose skeleton to my day. It was dope! Now, I think I’m ready to try this out in real…

[middleagedmary]

Vacationing for Relaxation and Productivity – Part II

Vacationing for Relaxation and Productivity – Part II

So, I am home from the first leg of my vacation. I guess now would be a good time to explain how this two-week vacay is being broken up. Week 1: Drive from California to Nevada with my husband, younger brother and kitten to spend the the week of the 4th of July with my parents, older brother and youngest brother. Week 2: Fly up to Ketchikan Alaska with my husband, his younger sister and his…

[middleagedmary]

Couldn’t agree more. Focus on the inside and the outside will follow.

Glowing up is not (exclusively) about losing weight, perfecting your makeup skills or buying an entire new wardrobe. Glowing up is about waking up every morning feeling a little bit closer to the woman (man, or otherwise) you were born to be. And who is she? She is wise and free and beautiful and successful... Whatever that means to her. She is the perfect balance of everything she's ever wanted to be.

"But perfection doesn't exist" you might argue. And you'd be right. As soon as you take a step forward, the best version of yourself will be one step further away: the more you learn, the more you'll be aware of all there is yet to achieve. So why chase perfection? Why strive to catch up with the best you, if it's as useless as running after a setting sun? Because that's how you keep moving forward, and in that movement, that quest for the better, you'll get to know yourself and hopefully, come to love her.

-aphroditesdiaries